#i am crying and laughing and some of these are omg dffdgs spot on some of them LMAO

[requiemofrebellion]

@deathfavor ― * ― Send in 📜 and I’ll use this incorrect quotes generator using your muse and my muse.

📜 give it to me for them all ( or as many as you wanna do )

Draken, in a meeting: My policy is if you see something, say something. Hanma: I saw a squirrel in a tree today! Draken, with the tone of someone who is used to Hanma: Outstanding. Draken: This is what I’m talking about people.

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Hanma: Whaddya call a fish with no eye? Draken, not looking up: Myxine Circifrons Hanma: Hanma: fsh

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Kazutora: Is something burning? Hanma: Just my love for you. Kazutora: Hanma, the toaster is on fire.

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Hanma: English is a difficult language. It can be understood through tough thorough thought, though. Kazutora: You need to stop.

Kisaki: Hanma was banned from the chicken shack, so we had to go out of town to get some. Hanma: Well, they shouldn’t say “all you can eat” if they don’t mean it. Kisaki: Hanma, you ate a chair.

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Hanma: You saved me. I owe you my life. Kisaki: No thanks. I’ve seen it and I’m not very impressed.

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Kisaki, tending to Kazutora's wounds: How would you rate your pain? Kazutora: Zero stars. Would NOT recommend.

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Kazutora, standing with their back turned: I’ve been expecting you, Kisaki. Kisaki: How did you do that without turning around? Kazutora: ... To be perfectly honest, the first couple of people I did that to were not you.

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Hanma, to Kazutora: My life is in the hands of an idiot! Kazutora, motioning to themself and Kisaki: No no no no no, TWO idiots!

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Hanma: What did you do with Kisaki's body? Kazutora: What didn’t I do with the body? Hanma: Kazutora: Okay, that sounded more sexual than I intended. I disposed of the corpse respectfully.

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Izana: I’m going to take you out Mikey: great, it’s a date! Izana: I meant that as a threat. Mikey: See you at five!

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Mikey: I prevented a murder today. Izana: Really? How’d you do that? Mikey: self control.

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Izana: Kakucho! My face is on fire! Kakucho: Izana! Are you ok?! Izana: Oh yes, I'm fine. I just said that to make sure you'd come in here quickly. Kakucho: But your face is on fire. Izana: Yes. It's much faster than shaving.

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Kakucho: Violence isn't the answer. Izana: You’re right. Kakucho: *sighs in relief* Izana: Violence is the question. Kakucho: What? Izana, bolting away: And the answer is yes. Kakucho, running after them: NO-

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Izana: On the count of three, what's your favorite cake? One, two, three- Izana and Hanma, in unison: Chocolate cake peanut butter frosting with chocolate chunks! Kisaki: Our turn, Kakucho! One, two, three- vanilla! Kakucho, deadpan: I've never had cake, what is cake.

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Kakucho: *Screams* Izana: *Screams louder to assert dominance* Kisaki: Should we do something?! Hanma, observing: No, I want to see who wins this.

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Mikey: Care for another sundae, weenie? Izana: I am not a weenie! Kisaki: Relax, you’re among friends. *raises their drink* Izana: My friends don’t hang out at Weenie Hut Jr’s. Hanma: You tell ‘em, Izana! *sips their drink* Izana: Hanma, what’re you doing here? Hanma: I’m always here on Double Weenie Wednesdays.

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Mikey: Tonight, one of you will betray us. Izana: Is it me, Mikey? Mikey: No, it’s not you. Kisaki: Is it me, Mikey? Mikey: It’s not you either. Hanma: Is it me, Mikey? Mikey: Mikey, mockingly: Is IT mE Mikey?

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Mikey: We’ve been conducting an ongoing study to see what Kisaki will and will not eat. Izana: Grass? Yes! Mikey: Moss? Yes!! Izana: Leaves? Ohh, yes! Mikey: Shoelaces? Strange but true! Izana: Worms? Sometimes! Mikey: Rocks? Usually nah. Izana: Twigs? Usually! Mikey: Kakucho's cooking? Inconclusive! Hanma: How did you… test this? Mikey: You just hand them stuff and say ‘eat this’ and if they eat it, they eat it. Hanma: ... I don’t know how to feel about this. Kakucho: IS THAT WHERE ALL MY SPARE SHOELACES WENT?

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Kakucho: What does 'take out' mean? Izana: Food. Mikey: Dating Hanma: Murder Kisaki: IT CAN MEAN ALL THREE IF YOU'RE NOT A COWARD.

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Hanma: *Kicks the door down looking panicked* Kakucho: What did you do? Hanma: Nobody died. Kakucho: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?!

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Kakucho: Do you have any skeletons in your closet? Hanma: You mean literally or figuratively? Kakucho: Honestly, the fact that I have to specify...

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Hanma: In my defense, I was left unsupervised. Chifuyu: Wasn't Kazutora with you? Kazutora: In my defense, I was also left unsupervised.

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Chifuyu: If I die, my funeral is going to be the biggest party ever and you’re all invited Hanma: If? Kazutora: Great, the only party I’ve ever been invited to and they might not even die.

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Chifuyu: I’m gonna need a human skull and I can't have you ask any questions why. Hanma: Only if you also don't ask why Hanma: *Pulls out 7 pristine human skulls* Take your pick. Chifuyu: Hanma: Chifuyu: This one is fine

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Hanma: Do you take constructive criticism? Chifuyu: I only take cash or credit.

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Hanma: Okay. I get it. You've had a really hard time lately, you're stressed out, seven people died- Lamia: Twelve, actually. Hanma: Not the point. Look, they're dead now and really whose fault is that? Lamia: Yours! Hanma: That's right: no one's.

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Lamia: Name a more iconic duo than my crippling fear of abandonment and my anxiety. I'll wait. Hanma: You and me!!! Lamia, tearing up: Okay.

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Chifuyu: Are you an ‘arr’ pirate, or a ‘yo ho ho’ pirate? Serpent: I’m a ‘I’m not paying $600 for photoshop’ pirate.

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Serpent: That’s one of my biggest fears. Like, if I ever woke up as a donut... Chifuyu: You would eat yourself? Serpent: I wouldn’t even question it.

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Machi: *holding a bottle* Is this whiskey or perfume? Chrollo: *chugs entire bottle* Chrollo: It’s perfume.

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Chrollo: WHAT’S YOUR TYPE Machi: Anything, honestly, but nerds especially Chrollo, desperately, as Machi bleeds out: YOUR BLOOD TYPE Machi: Oh! B positive. Chrollo: DONT TRY TO CHEER ME UP JUST TELL ME YOUR BLOOD TYPE Machi:

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Shinya: *Gets down on one knee* Byakkomaru: Oh my god, it’s finally happening. Shinya: *Falls over* Byakkomaru: The poison is kicking in.

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Byakkomaru: Sorry it took me so long to bail you out of jail Shinya: No it’s my fault, I shouldn’t’ve used my one phone call to prank call the police

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Shinya: This is such a bad idea. Horn: Then why are you coming along? Shinya: One of us need to be able to talk the cops out of arresting us when this inevitably goes wrong.

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Horn: You often use humor to deflect trauma Shinya: Thank you Horn: I didn't say that was a good thing Shinya: What I'm hearing is, you think I'm funny

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Killua: I actually have a black belt. Kalluto: In what, karate? Killua: No, from Gucci.

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Kalluto: I turned out perfectly fine! Killua: Kalluto, this morning you thought a ghost made your toast Kalluto: I DIDN’T PUT THE BREAD IN! YOU DIDN’T PUT THE BREAD IN!!!

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Inui: I know you’re deflecting by making jokes about how hot you are. Izana: It’s not a joke. Izana: *sniffles* Izana: I’m a legit snack.

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Izana: Am I going too far? Inui: No, no, no. You went too far about seven hours ago. Now you're going to prison.

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Draken: .. .----. -- / ... --- .-. .-. -.-- [translation: I’M SORRY] Kazutora: What's that? Draken: Remorse code. Kazutora: I'm even angrier now.

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Kazutora, struggling to keep upright in their 1 inch heels: Yeah, I-I don’t really think heels are for me Draken, pointing at them and walking flawlessly in sparkly golden 6 inch heels: WEAK.

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Kazutora: I'm incredibly fast at math. Mikey: Alright, what's 30x17? Kazutora: 47 Mikey: That's not even close. Kazutora: But it was fast.

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Mikey: What’s up guys? I’m back. Kazutora: What the- you can’t be here. You’re dead. I literally saw you die. Mikey: Death is a social construct.

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Mikey: I slept for almost 12 hours but I might still be tired so lets go for 12 more just incase. Hanma: Mikey, that's a coma. Mikey: Sounds festive.

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Hanma: What if the 'g' in 'gif' is silent? Mikey: Go the fuck to sleep Hanma: What gif I don't want to? Mikey: Fuck You