#i believe it's one of those times when we can't take it any more –woolf

[fromdarzaitoleeza]

Hii ( this is a scheduled post )

If you are reading this now just know that this was written 3 days ago, i have been doing terrible in all aspects of life ( in Everything you can possibly imagine = family, love , friends, career , mental/physical health etc) .

I hate to admit but things are really dire and have been traumatic from a couple of months now, when i say traumatic I mean the real shit like real !

So much of the time has passed ever since i have been trying to battle everything in my life , and i have been carrying myself all this time while I reached my exhausted self long long ago ( this is coming from a person who doesn't give up or who never easily gives up on anything)

I would need a break from everything while I search for myself , and get over the voices in my head and flash backs of all the trauma which wakes me up in the middle of the night with rage, i don't even feel safe where i stay currently i genuinely hope sooner I will be able to change it.

I carry so much rage and grief inside me , which is eating me up from inside, more rage than grief or more grief than rahe I am not sure which one is true ,I can't even properly keep this text to one topic it's a combination of so many things that has led me to this state .

I used to achieve so much as a child and teen i don't know how things got so bad overtime and now i am failing at everything as an adult and even Falling apart ,time has passed so quickly i can't accept it .

I hope the next time I come back online to this site I will be much better, in case you ever miss my poetry or work , a mutual from here takes care of my instagram and posts it ( I believe she would be able to keep it active for a while ) !!!

I will take a break from everything and have some time away from everything , i can go on living without having access to the phone for a couple of weeks i have done this before hopefully I will be able to do it again !

Thank you for always hearing me out, the amount of love i received on Tumblr is so massive 💗🫂, i have never been loved so much anywhere else as I have been loved by people here 🙏Your anon texts have helped me to keep moving from time to time !

“i have spent all of my life trying

Trying not to lose my last hope ”