#i didn't edit this lol have fun reading the unstructured sentences

[admdmrtn]

hi edith :-) how are things with nate?

That’s a loaded question, she thinks to herself. Thankfully, no one’s in the office with her to demand for an answer immediately, so she decides to take her time to mull it over.

Edith leans back, looking outside to where the caramel hues of the sun embraces all that they come into contact with, creating shadows that cast along the streets in a warm bronze glow, reminding her aptly of a certain vampire’s eyes.

She sighs, tearing her eyes away. She grabs a stress ball from her desk and tosses it into the air; while it defeats the purpose of the object, throwing and catching it has always been the better remedy at distracting Edith rather than merely squeezing it.

Stop digressing.

She’s unsure of this ... love triangle that she seems to have found herself entangled in. On one hand, things with Nate are always easy. Comfortable. And Edith knows she can rely on him to communicate his feelings openly, which in turn encourages her to do the same as well. There is no reason whatsoever to feel insecure whenever she’s with Nate, and there’s just something about him that lets her be at ease. Not to mention their multiple shared hobbies and likings - which definitely helps them in their process of enjoying each other’s company.

And yet.

Edith catches the stress ball, her arms outstretched far above her head. Biting the insides of her cheeks, she squeezes it hard till she can barely feel her fingers.

She knows deep down that it would be a lot less complicated if she can just give her entire heart to him. Besides, Nate has already declared how he feels towards her; but they remain at a standstill, and it’s all on her to make that next move.

Another sigh escapes her lips as she closes her eyes, bringing her arm down. Maybe she might - maybe she might accept his confession. Perhaps, it’s the right thing to do. If anything, Edith feels massively guilty for constantly thwarting away his advances and she knows that it’s only a matter of time before she has to stop dragging him along, leading him on, and decide.

But then again, it’s in the fact that Edith is taking so long to make up her mind that elucidates the bigger problem. The other side of the story, if you will. One that involves a broody leader.

She sits upright in her chair, both hands fiddling on the stress ball now. 

See, while Edith is much more similar to Nate in terms of taste, what she feels towards him is a stronger platonic connection rather than a romantic one. True, that the best of love stories buds from a solid rooted friendship, but it seems to Edith that this may be an anomaly. Because whenever she tries to think of Nate in that regard, the image rarely stays for long and it’s Adam who takes his place in replacement eventually. With him, there’s an attraction that Edith simply cannot explain - cannot do anything else but to feel - and it compels her to do almost anything to continue delaying the progression between her and Nate’s relationship. 

Well, that’s your answer, isn’t it?

“No,” she whispers to herself.

There’s your answer.

“No-”

“E.D.?”

A different voice calls to her, coming from the front of the station rather than inside her head. The door to her office creeks softly as it opens, and not a second later, Edith’s eyes meet brown, mirroring the glaze that blankets the world outside.

Truly, it feels like the universe has prompted the answer all along - and now, he’s literally standing right before her.

But Edith can’t help it when her chest tightens, disappointment settling deep within her very being. She can’t help it when the realisation washes over her as though she hadn’t already knew about it all this time.

As her eyes lock into Nate’s adoring gaze, Edith feels nothing except guilt alone while her answer repeats itself over and over in her mind.

I choose Adam.