#i died trying to make this deadline lmfao

[white-hyacinths]

My submission to Wynncraft's Festival of the Blizzard contest!

[spinsterennui]

I was tagged by the amazing, kind, lovely @sherrinford221b Thank you so so so much for thinking of me darling. I love doing these things. Sorry this took a couple days. I’m not going to tag anyone though bc you guys almost never do my tags. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Super long so I’m going to put under the cut :)

the last 1/ drink/ tea

2/ phonecall/ I think to my doctor?

3/ text message/ with my best friend/ex/roomie

4/ song you listened to/ rise to me by the decemberists

5/ last time you cried/ earlier today

6/ dated someone twice/ no

7/ kissed someone and regretted it/ the last time I did this? oh shit no clue. but I’ve done it several times.

8/ been cheated on/ yes. last time was probably when my fiance (who actually ended up od’ing) cheated on me

9/ lost someone special/ this past spring

10/ been depressed/ I deal with this every single day of my life

11/ gotten drunk and thrown up/ the last time was quite a while ago... probably in college

3 favourite colours 12/ purple 13/ black 14/ grey

in the last year have you 15/ made new friends/ sort of

16/ fallen out of love/ sadly no, only into it

17/ laughed until you cried/ yes

18/ found out someone was talking about you/ no, didn’t find out lol

19/ met someone who changed you/ YES changed my life in so many ways, made me a better person, a better writer and thinker, allowed me to fulfill my dreams and just basically saved me from a life of misery even if he doesn’t realize it. I will always love him for this. With absolutely no qualifications.

20/ found out who your friends are/ yes it’s funny how when you need people the most, that’s when people abandon you and you realize they never were your friend to begin with

21/ kissed someone on your facebook list/ i only just made an actual facebook with my actual name and I haven’t even followed anyone or anything on it lmao

general 22/ how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life/ ......

23/ do you have any pets/ skipping this one right now bc still too hard

24/ do you want to change your name/ not anymore

25/ what did you do for your last birthday/ finished an essay lmao like literally my bday was the deadline. then again that shit makes me happy so.....

26/ what time did you wake up/ today? I actually slept until 5 bc the sun was not very bright this morning :)

27/ what were you doing at midnight last night/ sleeping

28/ name something you can’t wait for/ to finish my dissertation and have my MA awarded to me and then to start work on my PhD; also can’t wait to go home bc it’ll be nice to not be alone all the time

29/ when was the last time you saw your mum/ I haven’t seen my mom in almost 20 years idek also haven’t talked to her in that long as well

31/ what are you listening to right now/ right now I’ve got Lucifer is on so I’m just listening to that with the traffic outside and the occasional rumble of the train that goes past my window

32/ have you ever talked to a person named tom/ I’m sure I have but tbh I can’t think of a single specific one

33/ something that is getting on your nerves/ oh god I hate to say it but I need a break from England/London lmao there are just things that I love but also things that just drive me fucking batshit nuts

34/ most visited website/ tumblr

35/ hair colour/ I have natural red hair but it’s a little lighter the older I get and I don’t color it

36/ long or short hair/ long but not super long anymore

37/ do you have a crush on someone/ lol yes obviously but I think it’s past the crush phase and is just soul-crushing agony stage by now

38/ what do you like about yourself/ my mind

39/ piercings/ ears only, three on left one on right

40/ blood type/ I actually don’t know for sure... that’s weird right? w/e

41/ nickname/ none

42/ relationship status/ single celibate and prob going to stay that way for the rest of my sad pathetic lonely life lmao

43/ zodiac/ aquarius

44/ pronouns/ she/her

45/ favourite tv show/ of the moment is Lucifer

46/ tattoos/ I have two shitty tattoos that I aim to get fixed one on my back and one on my ankle

47/ right or left handed/ right; but when I eat two-handed I sometimes use my fork in the right, sometimes in the left

48/ surgery/ wait what? like have I had any??????? my tonsils and adenoids out????

49/ sport/ I used to swim competitively; as far as watching none really anymore I like watching swimming at the olympics and I used to love hockey but stupid bettman stole my team so fuck the nhl

50/ vacation/ ??????????

51/ pair of trainers/ black on black vans

more general 53/ eating/ I am so confused by some of these... like what do I like? american food lmao no but really I have serious food issues and can’t eat a lot of food in general it sucks but it’s not just “being picky” it’s literally physically recoiling in horror and absolute discomfort with a lot of foods

54/ drinking/ I try to drink a lot of water but I also love tea and espresso drinks

55/ i’m about to/ fuck around on tumblr lmao but in the near future I’m about to go home for a while!!!!!!!!!!! yay!!!!!!!!! never thought I’d miss georgia that godforsaken place lmfao

56/ waiting for/ “someone” to be single? lol jk waiting for idk a lot of movies to get released, shows to start, nothing big right now. waiting for my plane ride home!!!!!!!

57/ want/ to finish my masters and get my phd, to make “someone” proud and have them be in awe of my accomplishments and to have them see me as an intellectual equal and not as a student....... (and also as other things lol but that’s not realistic)

58/ get married/ lol see above

59/ career/ academic and fiction writer

which is better 60/ hugs or kisses/ depends on who it is

61/ lips or eyes/ eyes but lips kiss so there’s that

62/ shorter or taller/ okay so for so long I’ve had a short dude fetish, and for girls I really love tiny itty bitty short girls (both girls I’ve been in love with were like 5 feet tall lmao), but after the TH thing, and now you know who, i’ve gotten a bit into the tall guys thing... so both are good lol

63/ older or younger/ okay so here is the thing when you’re younger everyone loves older men but when you get to be my age it stops being as attractive lmao so I’d rather have a slightly younger dude or my age... girls I don’t care either way :)

64/ nice arms or nice stomach/ i like arms and tummies both but I admit a slight thing for tummies bc you know who does this thing where he always wears shirts that ride up and he pushes his hair back and shows his nice slightly brown tummy and it’s super super good [I want to show a pic but I am terrified that will out me more than I’m willing to have in this forum even though I do use his name occasionally lmao]

65/ hookup or relationship/ I have to say they both have their positive aspects

66/ troublemaker or hesitant/ hmm... sometimes the most hesitant person is a troublemaker underneath

have you ever 67/ kissed a stranger/ yes

68/ drank hard liquor/ yes

69/ lost glasses/contact lenses/ I don’t wear them (though I need them desperately)

70/ turned someone down/ yes but I admit I don’t do this very well I have trouble saying no it’s the sub in me

71/ sex on the first date/ yes

73/ had your heart broken/ all the time lmao

74/ been arrested/ fun fact, yes! I’ve been arrested for fucking expired tag/no insurance in godforsaken athens clarke county it was a bunch of shit

75/ cried when someone died/ yes

76/ fallen for a friend/ yes

do you believe in 77/ yourself/ I wish I could say yes, but not really. However, I don’t give up, so in a way I’m constantly trying to prove myself wrong about myself.

78/ miracles/ not as much anymore

79/ love at first sight/ not love, I don’t think love is a visual thing

80/ santa claus/ ........

81/ kiss on the first date/ yes if it feels right

82/ angels/ yes absolutely just not necessarily the whole surrounding christian stuff

other 84/ eye colour/ blue

85/ favourite movie/ Brazil :)

[yaminerua]

Tagged by @yuuripean

Never got this particular tag meme before so this’ll be fun!

Gonna shove it under a cut tho cos it’s a little long

5 things you’ll find in my bag

1. A rubber egg with Jouta Kujo drawn on it that a friend gave me

2. A sketchpad for whenever I get a chance to sit and draw

3. Old train tickets from god knows how long ago that have no business being in there but are still there anyway

4. Period pads. Because you just never know when it’s gonna strike

5. ipad... in desperate hopes I’ll find a wifi that’ll let me connect

5 things you’ll find in my bedroom

1. Cosplay stuff. Mostly the Kakyoin wig that sits on its stand overseeing the entire room

2. A massive foam yaoi hand that was given to me by a stranger on a London train completely randomly lmfao... It’s just sort of.. there.. It amuses me greatly

3. A lightbox that was given to me by a friend. I need to clear that area so I can use it again tho ;;;

4. A bunch of anime figures still in their boxes cos I have no available space to actually set them up nicely

5. Plushies. Pokemon plushies, Naruto plushies, matsu plushies, random dog plushies and Mokona.

5 things I’ve always wanted to do in life

1. Really get into the animation industry and like.. properly become what I’ve always wanted to be ;;

2. Have a stall at an anime con selling art and stuff

3. Learn Japanese and go to Japan and visit lots of places there

4. Make my own cosplays fully by myself

5. Create something that people would love and enjoy (or at least be a part of something like that)

5 things that make me happy

1. The fun and adventure of travelling to cons with friends and just. everything that those weekends bring

2. People’s positive reactions to things I create, even when I myself don’t particularly think it turned out all that well. I really appreciate that

3. Hugs. And just? Cozy stuff like friends all bundled together watching a thing with a cup of noodles and snacks and shit like that

4. Getting to eat my favourite foods. Or making something and trying it and having it turn out yummy!

5. When people show me a thing they made for me, or tag me in something they think is relevant to my interests or just ;;;; little things like that

5 things I’m currently into

1. Mob Psycho 100. It has 100% taken over my life currently and I’m just accepting this as my fate rn.

2. CLAMP. Just. Everything CLAMP (though you all know I love the CLAMP School, TB and X stuff the most)

3. Osomatsu-san. I’m still dearly fond of those six shitty boys and that lonely little oden man

4. Voltron. I’m gonna die waiting for season 3

5. JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure. I’m so sad part 4 anime is over, but I’ll look forward to the possibility of a part 5 anime!

5 things on my To-Do list

1. Drawing stuff, like commission work and also something for a zine I forgot I signed up to.. RIP the zine’s deadline is really soon

2. Get the SU Reanimate shot done

3. Make an attempt at starting my Mob cosplay. or at least do like.. a mini-practice run-through to figure things out???

4. Tidy my room since I got a friend coming to stay really soon oh god I need to tidy this place up

5. Some ficlet things I owe people who sent asks (not to mention other fics that need updates.....). My writing has died and I need to revive it.

5 things people may not know about me

1. When I was about 5 I had alopecia so my hair fell out a lot, especially at the back. But once that got sorted it all grew in really thick again.

2. I used to go to an acting school but left because of an extreme confidence crash.

3. I am terrible at judging the volume of my own voice and often do not realise I’m speaking louder than I maybe should be.. I always need to be told to hush

4. I flooded someone’s bathroom once completely by accident and never ever owned up to it. I still feel super guilty about it

5. I once sent my grandparents on my mum’s side a fake fanclub letter for the football team they despise because I thought it would be funny. They didn’t see the funny side xD

idk who to tag in this. I’m a weenie who never tags ;;;;

[survivormuxloe]

Episode 16: “I’m a petty bitch betta know that” - Scott

FUCK YOU RHYS HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA I SURVIVED GOAT ASS BITCH IM COMIN FOR THAT FIC WIN SO I CAN TAKE UR GOATY ASS TO THE END AND WIN I FUCKING DESERVE IT THAT WAS THE MOST STRESSFUL THING OF MY FUCKING LIFE HOLY SHITTTTTTTTTTTTT AS ANNA WOULD SAY IM HARDDDDD

Oh boy mo lost firemaking. Oh well. I tried. Not sure there is much hope in me winning, but guess I have to try. Ima be preparing a bomb ass speach, and a decent rites of passage. Not looking hopefully but like fingers crossed.

Also I think I’d make end either way now. Scott wants me in the end probably. Ryan wants me in the end probably. So if so. I get 2nd at the least. But I’m probably winning immunity anyway so ;).

ok its the day after.. n i finished my rop.. hopefully the jury likes it. LOL LIKE I WASNT GUNNA JUST KISS THEIR ARSES FUCK THAT im gunna be honest ab my feelings...

also like. kinda feel bad ab my confessionals last nite ab rhys.. i was a bit. excited. but. its tea. LAMFJBFHBFG

Final immunity is a little stressful. Like it’s the last one to win, if I win this that’s 5 individual wins. Just something more to put on my speech cause I’m gonna need it.

I’m feeling confident I can manage to pull out this win so like yeah I’m gonna have to work and try to win each part of this.

im actually gunna lose this fic which is super annoying bc it means i get 3rd LOL! aLMNFBFG

like memory lane i can win if im not dumb which i am so. winterbells i'll 100% lose like i lost to anna lol. endurance i'll 100% lose bc i'm such a forgetful slut i only lasted 40 mins in canadienne.... slide puzzles are legit my worst nightmare and then the mystery task i looked up from last ssn and it took them 11 mins so if i take more than that i lose... yay!

wow i can't wait to get 3rd place;;;; i feel like scott has gotten into rhys' ear and now i'm not the prime choice to be brought to final 2 grrr. at least thats what it seems like idk. ugh rhys doesnt deserve to make final 2 and it will make for a boring ftc zzzzzz who knows maybe scott or i can pull out an upset. i lowkey think scott would vote me out tho which is ugly and i would 100% be bitter at him idgaf KLFADHSKF

earlier i wasn't really sure what rhys and scott were thinking in regard to who they'll bring to f2, but since then i've talked w both more and i feel like 80% confident both will take me to final 2 so that's cute 8~] i don't think i'm doing well in the final immunity so far so i'm honestly banking on that lol.... as much as I think I'd have better chances against Rhys as the end, I am rooting for Scott to win it and bring me bc that is the ending this season deserves imho. i don't think there'd be a clear cut winner going into it and the ftc would be contentious as fuck... i hope at least lol. Scott def played a really dominant strategic game but def has some iffy relationships with jurors. I played a really purposefully utr game for most of the time but i think it's respectable, although there are some point against me like sitting out of so many challenges, that tie vote with jones voting early being the reason i was saved... but i think i can make a good case despite those faults and i'm honestly excited to show a new me at the live tribal. like i've been nervous as hell every time we had to go to tribal bc calling makes me anxious af, and that was def a contributing factor to me sitting out of the spelling challenge and even the card stacking one. so I'm planning on forming my case around that anxiety, and hopefully the contrast between my ftc performance compared to every live one before that will bank me the jury's respect. kind of like Kristie from AU survivor where she stunned the jury bc all game she had appeared so timid and dumb at tribals. hoping i can channel that energy and pull out the win hehe

so we got 5 and a half ish hours until deadline. uhm. i'm honestly really happy with my scores? like. i feel as if i have a big chance of winning this and that would be SOOOOO fucking good like both of them can smd honestly if they think im giving this chance up and getting 3rd or getting 2nd to ryan... like i love him but hes beyond dumb if he thinks im taking him to the end i cant throw a victory like that lol.

i dont wanna get 2 confident tho bc knowing my ass i'll be crushed if i lose this fic lol like at least if i dont i know ryan wins so it isnt that bad but it should be me!!! im a selfish cunt i need this jsjsjs

i say this after doing endurance for 5 and a half hrs so my brain is a little floopy rn :) forgive me :) aLFMNHFG

uhm ya. rhys can suck my ass as well with his OH IDK WHO I'D PICK!!! like bitch if u pick ryan enjoy a rerun of canadienne only this time ur losing unanimously lol

Honestly im done with Scott. Like stop being rude okay. Like I GET IT. YOU DONT WANT TO BE 3rd!. I GET IT. Like quit it with the "I dont want to wait to be cut", cause honestly, I dont know who im taking, OR IF IVE EVEN WON YET. so like stop it. Like ive been told im gonna loose, stop attacking me, because i essentially chooses who wins.

I think my immunity went good. I did good in all the parts I think.

ok.... time to guilt scott into bringing me to the end lmfao

Dammit I was so close to winning, but in the end from what I’ve heard I’d be the best choice for Scott to take to the end. So fingers crossed. Scott will take me there cause I really want to make the end. Even if I loose. I’m proud of my game and I just want to get as far as I can.

BIG FUN! CUS TONIGHTS THE NIGHT. bitchhh i get to pick who i want in f2 with me!!!

THIS IS SO EXCITING BC I LEGIT HAVE NEVER WON A FIC OR A F3 CHALLENGE BEFORE AND I FUCKING DID THAT!!! I SWERVED THAT VICTORY AND ITS SO FUCKING SATISFYING HOLY FUCKK

NOW IM GUNNA MAKE RHYS SUFFER EVEN THO IK IM PROB PICKING HIM BC HE WAS AN ASSHOLE LAST WEEK :)) IM A PETTY BITCH BETTA KNOW THAT

LIKE RYAN UNDERSTANDS IF I VOTE HIM N HE 100% VOTES ME TO WIN AND I DONT PLAN ON FLOPPING FTC SO :) BYE! UR WINNER IS HERE!

i feel like scott is gonna vote me out and i’m a bit gagged sbdbjsjsjs i really didn’t expect him to slit my throat like dis but. ig he wants to win badly and rhys most likely secures him an easy win so i cant blame him. still sucks though :C i thot we were solid dndjjdjs and ugh i dont wanna join that angry ass jury

ok so i'm still not giving up on tryna convince scott lol. honestly like i've made it this far in the game, no way i'm gonna accept defeat so easily. i don't actually know if it's better for scott to sit next to rhys than me, it probably is but seriously my game isn't amazing and i very well could see scott beating me. i think he's really overestimating how much the jury "hates" him like idk they aren't that petty, if anyone is it might just be michael. but scott really has dominated this game and everyone is aware of it, he should beat either of us.

So, this could be my last confession.

Scott, I don’t know where he was thinking. I thought it was general concensous that I was the one to loose. Yet here I am Scott is still unsure about who to take and it’s an hour 40 untill tribal.

So like this could speak well about my game if Scott worries he can’t beat me. It could also just be him wanting to take his best friend to the end. So yeah. I’m like 50/50 when I thought I should’ve been 99/1 about staying.

I can’t believe I’m here. I have a half chance at winning. That’s if we’re even which were probably not.

This is probably an uphill battle for me, so I have to go hard or I’m going home empty handed. I haven’t lasted this long just to come second. I do think I’ve played a winning game. I think I can make a killer final tribal preformance just to solidify my case. Hopefully this will be the third winner of celestial.

So final tribal happened.

Funny how has mo won that tiebreaker I would’ve lost unanimously. So thanks scott for winning that, and the FIC.

I think this could go either way tbh. However if I win it’s because of Scott’s bad jury management which isn’t the way I wanted to win. I would’ve preferred people to see my game more and respect that but because my moves weren’t big or flashy I have been put down to doing nothing.

it's 2 and a half hours until we find out the winner. am i nervous? absolutely.

do i feel as though i deserve to win? absolutely.

it just keeps ringing in my mind what ryan said in his speech that the jury seemed to root for rhys and be bitter against me. i feel as though my speeches and answers were much better than his and i was able to explain my game so much more clearer so i'm hoping that they reconsider and see that i controlled the game.

if i lose i'll be gracious and nice to rhys because at the end of the day it was my own fault that my jury management was bad but it'll definitely sting because i don't really see that he did much tbh alkfjhfg. i love him but it's tea. especially when he's said that i probably deserve it more. ):

i'm really just hoping for the best at this point! anything can happen and hopefully it'll be in my favour hehe. it's been an incredibly fun season and i wouldn't change it for anything else.

this has been mr scooty toots with his finale confessional, and hopefully mr scooty toots will join the winner and the hall of fame. hehe. will lowkey be awkward if i lose tho!! LOL but oh well alkdjfg

Scott wins in a 8-1 vote!