#i guess that coming from a fandom where the band has sworn to never perform outside of their home country prepares you for that

[bisonaari]

Guys calm down

He's literally losing money on the european tour I thirk we can sympathize with the fact that he may not be thrilled by international gigs anymore because of that

He's also had no rest for a full year at this point. Exhaustion and passions do not mix well, it's very emotional from all sides and punches you in the face. Let's try to understand how he feels ok

We knew it from the start. He wants to stay in finland and perform in finland and sing in finnish. It's alright. We'll watch him online

We're not entitled to ANY of his time.

[winchesterprincessbride]

Still I Rise-Part 3

Master List

Intro (all parts are linked)

Characters-Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester, Jim (OC), Rhiannon (OC), Reader

I was a solitary child.  I just preferred to be alone.  I had a very active imagination and enjoyed playing in the woods behind our house from the time I allowed out alone.There was a stream that emptied into a small pond that I particularly loved. I used to pretend that I could turn into a mermaid and swim far away to the ocean

.One rainy afternoon someone else was playing in my pond when I got there.  She looked to be around my age, with short dark hair and deep blue eyes.  Her skin looked a little bluish, but she had a friendly smile.

 “Hi!” I said brightly. “I’ve never seen you before.  Do you live around here? My name is Y/N.”

“I live where the waters run.  I am Rhiannon.  Would you like to join me?”

I spent an enjoyable afternoon playing with my new friend, and she promised she would come and see me again, just as long as I kept our time together as our little secret. 

Jim and I hunted together after the deaths of my mom and sister,  and he taught me everything he knew.  He began my best friend and as I became more immersed in the world of hunting, I left my old life behind and I never looked back.

Under Jim’s tutelage, I learned to draw a demon trap, perform an exorcism, and shoot with deadly accuracy.  My life became a cycle of dingy motels, take out food, and pretending to be someone I wasn’t.

But every person I saved, every I monster I ganked, did nothing to quell the anger inside me.  I took stupid risks because I knew I could.  My reckless actions drove a wedge between Jim and me.

“What the hell were you thinking, Y/N? I told you to wait for me! Taking on a whole vamp’s nest by yourself is suicide! Do you have a goddamn death wish?” He demanded as we barely escaped with our skins.

“I had it under control!” I snapped. “I don’t know why you’re getting so angry!” 

Jim threw up his arms in frustration as he continued to yell. “One of these days your actions are going to get both of us killed, Y/N.”

“Don’t hold your breath,” I whispered morosely as I ran into the bathroom with my bottle of Jack and locked myself in. I sank to the floor sobbing and spent the night on the questionably clean bathroom floor drinking myself into oblivion.

Jim died because I got cocky.  

It was only two vamps, and I thought that I could phone it in and I got careless, and it cost Jim his life.  It was over in minutes.  All that remained when the hunters found me were two headless vamps and me on the floor cradling Jim’s body as he bled out.

I sat there for the longest time.  Soon you couldn’t tell if the blood was mine or his, we were both covered in it.  I think I was in shock.  I heard the shouts, and I felt the strong arms try to pull me away from him.  I fought like a maniac until I finally collapsed in the guy’s arms, sobbing hysterically.

He held me while I cried, and he told me he was a hunter too.  He asked me my name, but I wasn’t able to stop crying long enough to tell him.  I sobbed uncontrollably.  Now that the tears had finally started, it seemed like they were never going to stop.

I cried for so long and so hard but still, the hunter sat on the ground and held me, not caring that he too was covered with Jim’s blood now.  It was as though a dam in me had burst, and all the tears I had been storing up for all these years were finally bursting free.

He told me his name was Sam.  He was very big, and he had cute dimples when he smiled and kind eyes.  Another hunter was with him, a stunner with haunted eyes that had clearly seen things he wanted desperately to forget.   Sam said this was his brother, Dean.

Sam helped me stand, and the combination of shock, dehydration from crying, and grief were just too much for me and I went down like a stone.  

When I woke I was in the back seat of Jim’s truck, and Sam was driving.  “Jim!” I said in a panic.

Sam smiled his dimpled smile at me.  “Don’t worry, my brother has your friend’s body.  We couldn’t leave you there like you were, so we figured we’d bring you to our place, and give him a hunter’s burial.”

“Thank you. Jim would want that.” I whispered. “I’m Y/N, by the way. I appreciate all your help.”

“Was Jim your boyfriend?” Sam asked me suddenly. I shook my head no. “Your husband, then?”

“No, nothing like that.  He was like a second father to me.  He saved me from a werewolf that killed my family, and I’ve been hunting with him ever since.” I closed my eyes as the tears threatened to start again.

“Why don’t you just relax for a bit? We will be at our place soon?” Sam said as he saw my stress level rising.

We sat in silence as I wondered what I was going to do now that Jim was gone.

Their “place” turned out to be their own private fortress. I have never seen anything like it.  Sam told me it used to be owned by this super secret organization called “the Men of Letters”. Turns out their grandfather was a Man of Letters and that made them legacies.

That night, Sam and Dean collected firewood for the pyre.  I wrapped Jim’s body myself, refusing to let anyone else touch him.  :”I’m so sorry, Jim.  I should have listened to you.  Your death is on me, and I will never forgive myself.  Goodbye old friend.” 

 I wiped the tears from my eyes with the back of my hand as I threw the match onto the pyre and watched the hungry flames ignite Jim’s body.  I could have sworn I saw the exact moment when Jim’s shirt broke free of his earthly body and floated away up to heaven.

I would have stayed there all night watching him burn had Sam not finally forced me to come inside.  “We need to get you out of those bloodstained clothes,” Sam said practically, leading me to the huge shower area in the back of the bunker while Dean dealt with Jim’s remains.

He left me for a moment and returned with a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt.  “These belonged to our friend Charlie.  You look about her size.  I’ll put your stuff in the wash while you shower.”

The shower washed away the dirt and blood, but nothing would wash away the guilt I felt. 

After I had showered and dressed in the borrowed clothes, I joined Sam and Dean in the library.  Dean handed me a double shot of whiskey which I tossed down in one gulp.  My eyes watered and I coughed, but I welcomed the burn.

“So what are you gonna do?” He asked.

I shrugged. “Hunt alone I guess.”  I’d been away from my old life for too long.  I couldn’t just go back like nothing had happened.  I wasn’t that girl anymore.

Sam and Dean exchanged a look between them that I didn’t catch.  “Why don’t you stay here tonight? We have plenty of extra beds.  Take your pick.” Sam suggested.

“You can figure out your options after you’ve had a good night’s sleep.” Dean agreed.

“I don’t want to impose, you two have helped me so much already....” I began.

“We insist, Y/N.” Dean smiled winningly at me, all green eyes and charm.

“Okay.” I finally conceded.  “But just for tonight.  I will leave in the morning.”

Dean walked me to an empty room, and when he closed the door behind him, the silence was deafening.  I had to admit, the idea of driving off alone tonight made my stomach churn.  I needed to close my eyes and not think for a little bit. 

I struggled to keep my eyes open, for fear of the dreams that would haunt me.  I had lost everyone in my life that mattered to me. My father, my mother, and sister, my best friends, my boyfriend, and now Jim. 

 I didn’t know if I could hunt without Jim, or if I wanted to.  Another chapter in my life had ended with the loss of Jim, and I didn’t know it, but another was about to begin.

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