#i just think she deserves the world and i'm tired of her getting shitty pictures

[beanghostprincess]

I like to imagine that after Sanji transitions and they all get new bounty photos, she's like 'oh thank GOD' but when they all finally get to see the new photos. Sanji's is still as much as a Travesty as before.

You may be able to change your gender but you cannot change the bad luck that is Picture Day

I like to think she gets a gorgeous picture for her bounty (even if she's not passing, bc that's stupid and she doesn't owe normative femininity to anybody and she's gorgeous no matter what!) and she looks so good even Nami is a bit jealous but they're all happy for her and the only reason her other bounty posters were shit was that she wasn't being true to herself. And then Zeff sees the wanted poster and hangs it right in the kitchen where everyone can see his daughter <3 And if anybody says something dirty about her he'll just kick their asses!

[wheels-of-despair]

The Letter Pairing: Eddie Munson x You Summary: Evil Woman gets a letter in the mail and says it's not a big deal… but to Eddie Munson, it's a very big deal. Contains: A misunderstanding, a dumb boy, a happy ending. Words: 1.4k

Eddie knocks twice, just to announce himself, before letting himself inside your house. "You don't have to knock, Eddie, you basically live here," they'd all told him several times, but he still felt like they deserved a warning.

Her mom has pulled a chair from the kitchen table closer to the phone mounted on the wall. She smiles and waves at him, gesturing for him to go on to the bedroom where his other half is probably getting ready for their favorite kind of date: Markdown Day at Tape World. They'd raid the clearance bin for new cassettes, then stop by the pretzel place for their usual. He'd get something salty, she'd get something sweet, and they'd split both and wash it down with a shared pop. Perfect.

"Yeah, the letter came earlier this week. She's playing it cool, but I think she's excited. She'll fit right in at Penn."

Eddie feels his blood run cold.

Of course the child of two college graduates is going to college. The thought had crossed his mind a few times, but he was always able to distract himself and banish it. But now…

His feet carry him to her bedroom while his brain spirals.

"Hey! Ready in a sec, just let me finish… oh, fuck it." She slams her textbook shut and tosses it from her place on the bed to the backpack by her desk. She rolls her eyes when it misses, then gets up to shove it into her backpack. She may not be getting a basketball scholarship, but of course she's college-bound.

She could have a real life. A future. A career. She could do anything. Hell, she'd taught him things in a week that the teachers of Hawkins High had been trying to beat into him for years. She's a fucking miracle-worker. Why would she stick around a shitty little town like this? For someone like him?

"Priorities," she smirks, wrapping her arms around his neck. She's so fucking beautiful. How is he gonna keep existing when she's not here? "You okay?" she asks, tucking a wayward strand of hair behind his ear. "You look paler than usual."

He closes his eyes and nods. She feels his forehead. If she cared so much, why would she leave him? "You sure?"

"I'm fine. Just tired," he lies. He misses her already. "Ready?"

She kisses the tip of his nose, and he tries not to cry.

"Let's blow this popsicle stand," she grins, grabbing a jacket.

Eddie forces a smile and feels his heart breaking.

*~One Week Later~*

"Switch those two paragraphs around, and I think you're good," you note, passing Eddie his essay back. You're sitting beside him at your kitchen table. Your brother is making a sandwich at the counter. It's the picture of domestic bliss.

"Thanks," Eddie mumbles, sticking the paper back in his English folder.

"We still on for Tape World tonight?" you ask hopefully. Maybe a good deal on some new music would perk him up. God knows he needs it.

"Dunno," Eddie mumbles without looking up, "got a lotta campaign stuff to work on."

"It's Markdown Day," you remind him.

He shrugs and starts gathering his stuff.

"Alright, what's your problem?" You snap the book in front of you shut, making your brother jump instead of Eddie. Oops.

"No problem," he lies, still not looking at you.

"Bullshit. You've been going back and forth between clingy and distant all week. What's your fucking problem, Munson?"

"I don't have a fucking problem," he spits as he starts shoving stuff into his backpack.

"Kay, this was fun, but I've gotta go do literally anything else!" your bother announces loudly as he scampers back to his room with his hastily-made sandwich, leaving his PB&J supplies open on the counter. Like he was raised in a barn.

You wait until you hear his bedroom door slam before you continue your attack on Eddie, who has run out of room in his backpack. (Your lunchbox, Eddie. You shoved your lunchbox in there.)

You put your hand on a folder and slide it toward you, out of his reach. He glares.

"Talk to me."

"I am," he says defiantly.

You consider beating him to death with his math folder.

"Give it," he orders, reaching out a hand for his folder.

You slide it further away from him, daring him to come get it.

"Or don't, I don't fucking care, I'm just gonna fail again anyway." He drops his overstuffed backpack on the floor and stomps toward the door.

"Eddie!" you call in shock. You stand as if you're going to physically stop him from leaving, but your feet don't want to move.

He gets to the kitchen door and puts his hand on the knob, but doesn't turn it.

"When were you planning on telling me about getting into college?"

"What?"

"I heard your mom on the phone, talking about your acceptance letter," he says to the door.

"Oh."

"Oh?" He turns around with an accusatory glare.

"I didn't think it was that big a deal," you shrug. And it wasn't... to you. You knew he was sensitive about the subject. He visibly bristled when anyone mentioned the c-word. You planned on breaking the news to him after graduation. One thing at a time. And right now, getting a high school diploma in Eddie Munson's hand was the only thing that mattered to you.

"Of course you wouldn't think getting into college is that big a deal."

"Eddie, I didn't mean it like that," you say gently.

"I guess moving a few hundred miles away from me isn't that big a deal either."

"What?"

"Don't play dumb, alright? I know you're going to Pennsylvania, where you won't have some dumb loser townie holding you back. Your mom seemed real happy about it."

Pennsylvania? You're going to… you connect the dots, and a laugh escapes you. You clamp your hand over your mouth.

His eyes fill with tears. "Yeah, it's gonna be real fuckin' funny when the love of my life runs off and forgets about me, just like everybody else did as soon as they graduated." This boy is giving you emotional whiplash. He turns around and reaches for the doorknob again.

This time, your feet cooperate. You rush over and wrap your arms around him from behind before he can get the door halfway open, and he tenses. You can feel his sides shaking. He's trying not to cry.

"That's not gonna happen."

"Bullshit." His voice cracks.

"Eddie, that's not gonna happen to us. Look at me."

He takes a shuddering breath and turns around, but keeps his eyes on the ceiling as he tries to blink back tears. You go in for a hug anyway. He resists for a second, but soon gives in and wraps his arms around you.

"I love you," you say into his neck.

Silence.

You thump him on the back. "Say it back."

"I love you, too," he mumbles.

"Do you trust me?"

He pulls back and looks at you with his big wet eyes and nods. You cup his face, kiss him on the tip of his nose, and smile. "Come with me. I gotta show you something."

"What?"

"Just come on," you grin. "Let's go for a little drive."

You scribble a note for your brother, in case he dares to venture out of the safety of his cave before you get back, and lead Eddie to the car.

Nineteen silent minutes later, you pull into a parking lot, find a space, and turn off the engine.

Eddie looks around quizzically at the parked cars, the people rushing by, and the bodies lounging on the grass. Then he looks to you.

"Where are we, Eddie?"

"Isn't this where your mom works?"

"Yeah. But where are we?"

He stares at you blankly. He's lucky he's pretty, because he is so damn dumb. You've never loved anyone more.

"C'mon," you smile, getting out of the car and waiting for him on the sidewalk. He watches you from the passenger's seat for a moment, until curiosity gets the better of him. You wait patiently, then hold out your hand when he approaches. When he takes it, you lead him toward the main building, where your point will be easier to make.

You stop and point at the massive stone sign. "What's that say?"

He huffs out an annoyed breath and reads, "Pennhurst Coll… oh." You see the realization dawn on his face, soon accompanied by a blush. "I'm an idiot."

"You're my idiot," you grin, pulling him close. "And I'm not going anywhere without you."

A Note From Wheels: Honestly can't remember if I've ever mentioned it, but in my mind, Evil Woman's mom has always been a college professor. 😂 EW will be attending Pennhurst because it's cheap (well, free, since Mom's got the hookup) and close to Eddie. 🥰 I'd imagine Pennhurst is not a very prestigious university, so Mom could probably get Eddie in if he wanted to go. (He absolutely does not.)

[flyingcakeee]

Part 2 of cunty Williams Racing, a tired and shitty analysis by yours truly, Cake.

Today, we dive into our former Williams drivers.

And who better to start off with than Jenson Button himself? He's technically in the team as a Heritage Driver, and senior advisor regarding both the F1 race and Williams academy drivers, but we'll ignore that for the sake of this tumblr post ☺️

Jenson Button is just a cunty British man and this is not foreign knowledge. He coined the name Britney for Nico Rosberg due to his hyper sexual fixation on Britney Spears (or so I'm told 😀) and, let's be honest, there's not a lot of explanation needed here (I say after a whole paragraph).

Next, of course, Nico Rosberg himself.

My guy beat his teammate, albeit not in Williams, in equal machinery for the world championship and then dipped to be a girl dad. A Girl Dad. And he became a reporter. A F1 reporter. Cunty af in every picture too. Just can't deny this man.

You know who the other Nico to drive for Williams is? Nico Hülkenberg!

Also a girl dad, dyed his already blond hair to be platinum blond, HulKENberg, got one of the last pole positions for Williams after they hadn't had one in 5 years and then was dropped at the end of the year and he came back after a year. Sure, he is allergic to podiums but may I remind you that this man is a 24 Hours of Le Mans winner?

Next, everyone's favorite, George Russell. Should not be a surprise, really.

It's George Russell! What am I supposed to say? His doe eyes and now ungelled hair should be enough of a reason. And he's an absolute diva 🤍.

Now, what's more cunty than getting all the older men around your finger, Lance Stroll?

Lance Stroll has the hips to be the cunty princess he is, let's admit it. His first season he scores his first points in Canada and then gets third place in the race right after? And, as previously mentioned, he has all the middle aged men of the paddock in love with him. Fernando Alonso, Checo Pérez, Sebastian Vettel, the list goes on.

Ignoring team orders and getting a race win? That's some cunt level activities from Mark Webber!

Mark Webber will have a pilots license and manage to get 2 different cars to fly into the air 4 times. Yes 4 as twice was in a RedBull and twice in the Mercedes during the 1999 Le Mans. And then he looks absolutely hypnotized by his teammates and fellow drivers. It's the Australian in him.

A little break here to say, oh my fucking god there's so many drivers I can do. I can have Valtteri Bottas or Pastor Maldonaldo or Felipe Massa or Ralf Schumacher or Nicholas Latifi or like, anyone really. Anyways, let's continue ☺️

The man who sighed a picture of him after his team dropped him, Nyck de Vries.

Points your debut race and then getting pulled out the car like the princess you deserve to be, it's beautiful. And oh yeah, his name is Hendrik Johannes Nicasuis "Nyck" de Vries and I think that's very fitting. I hope he's enjoying Formula E because I'm going to buy into temptations and go to a race just to see my short princess 🤭.

Oh, you think I forgot the Queen herself, Susie Wolff? YOU ARE WRONG!!! 🥳🥳

I love Susie Wolff. Former Williams development driver and definitely could've been a great driver today if she was on the grid. And, she's president of the F1 Academy and defeated the FIA's little investigation probe which is funny because a lot of FIA executives have been quitting now soooo go Susie!!! Everyday I wonder how Toto Wolff got lucky to be her husband, the queen's husband ☺️

And let's end us off today with a picture of Lance's hips and one of the older men staring at it as if it's his property (probably is)

Beautiful.

At the end of the day, Williams fosters cunty drivers and team principal and it is my favorite thing ever. This isn't saying other teams don't possess any cunt energy, but Williams has a lot of it rooted in history and I am also sleep deprived and sick 🥳🥳🥳

[dungeonpuppykai]

Small World anon here again,sorry. I can't believe I left out one thing in that long ass ask of mine,where Bucky wouldn't ate without Reader. Like- That is so- 🥺 *sniffs* I know that you wrote that she's the homerunner so that means she's the one who cooks & do all the other houseworks,I understood it but it's still so cute and all the more heartbreaking,you know? 🥲 I also understood it as he wouldn't eat WITHOUT her. He wouldn't eat if she's not eating with him,like a proper family (married couple/old married couple) type of thing. Like even if the food's ready,he's not eating and refuses to eat if she doesn't too,WITH HIM 🥺😭 Does that mean Bucky refuses food when he's in jail the first time they served him after he got caught? Cause he was in bliss & on cloud nine for months living a normal domestic life with her that it's hard to let go even though he's mad at her for thinking she reported him so he refused eating the first time they gave him food in jail right after he got caught? Back to their domestic phase! That is so cute tho! He wouldn't eat without her,awww! 😭 He's tired and beat coming home from work and he's starving after a long shift and he's about to eat but he sees that Reader's not eating and now he's not eating either. They both need to be at the table EATING together for him able to eat AWWWWW 😭💕

Okay,okay,I'm done gushing about Small World. I'll stop being annoying now,seriously 😭 Btw,I wrote that very long review/feedback ahead so I can truly express every single thing on how I feel on each plot/scenes in Small World so I didn't notice that you've changed the picture you photoshopped to the one of a gif of Bucky from CA : TWS. In fact,it's still showing the photoshopped picture in my reblog lol. But my point still stands,I felt bad that you had to so much work for my request,including photoshopping. Just know that I really appreciate every single thing you do to perfect my fic request in such a short time,thank you so much again 🙏🏼❤❤❤ A million times thank you 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🫂🫂🫂🫂

I also saw your posts and #kai rambles that I've missed. I'm so sorry for everything. I still felt bad about my late feedback but I understood you meant in general. Yeah,it sucked that people couldn't take the time to leave a feedback,a short comment,a reaction anything to a work that an author/writer put so much work and effort into in such a short time for our reading enjoyment. It's especially even more of a shitty move if it's a request a writer decided to take up and then there's just silence afterwards once the request is written...... Forever. Crickets,nothing. The writer doesn't even get paid for writing these requests. The least they could do is simply give a feedback,a short simple straight to the point feedback accompanied with a thank you. It's not that hard. I don't know. People need to be more appreciative. It's not easy at all to write,I tried and it's hard asf. Don't just go complete silence after a completed request,it's not too much to ask at all. It's the bare minimum. I know that a fic you've written have gotten 1k notes,prob reaching 2k now as we speak. I'd love nothing more than to see that kind of interactions happen again with every single one of your work because a talented,kind & humble writer like you is more than deserving of it ❤ I can try to be interactive but I'm one person. But try,I will. Cause it feels like the only way I can give back the same way writers like you put your heart & love into all of your works for our sake. So we would surreal reading experience. And it's really not asking much at all when the writers's the ones doing all the work between writers & readers.

Are you okay btw? I saw your #kai rambles,what's going on? If you need someone to talk to,you can vent to me,I'll dm you. If that's crossing the line,then you can just vent to me through these anon asks instead. You wrote that you felt insecure about your writings,that this app made you feel that way and that you might chuck it all one day. I want to plead to you please don't but this is YOUR blog and all the fics you wrote are YOUR works,YOUR properties so I have no say to say what you can or can't do with your own work. Your own blood,sweat & tears. But I will still have hope that you'll stay 🫂❤ I've found works from deactivated writers (and they're really good too) where I try to find that maybe they left their work up on AO3 but nothing. Can't find their full works anywhere,it's like they disappeared off the radar completely. And I've seen some talented writers deactivated and deleted all of their works from all the sites they posted them on. It truly felt like you just lost something important in your life,especially when you've been following their works for years and suddenly one day,they just disappeared. It's an empty feeling of loss that can be filled or replaced. Every writer is unique and has their own style. No 2 of them will ever truly be the same. It breaks my heart to know that such a creative and talented writer like you feels insecure about your own work and view them in a different light than your readers do? I'll convince you that your writings are perfect a million times if I have to. I'm so sorry that you still felt this way. Idk what to do to make you change your mind. The least I can do is offer support and tells you how much your writings meant to me. How happy it makes me. How it stayed in my mind for a long time afterwards 💜 Your writings are beautiful ❤ They're perfect 💕 And I'm not telling you what to do but I hope you'll stay here for a long time 🫂 Your writings are not how you see them at all. They're freaking amazing 🙏🏼 Also,I saw that you're taking a break from writing for a while,is that correct? If that's so then take care of yourself,honey ❤ Hope you'll feel a lot better once you return 🫂 I'll miss you but I understand 💜 Take care of yourself first 💜🫂 Lack of interactions can really be grating. Take care of yourself properly,I'll still be here if you ever want to talk 🫂❤ Sorry again for writing so long.

First off, I love the chokehold that Small World Bucky has us in 😂🩷

YESSS! Lord knows how I sobbed writing it because fuck if someone cared for me and my presence like that 🥺 (and I literally enjoy eating alone lmfao). No, you're right. It doesn't matter whether she has cooked or not because some days she can be sick and surely hubby isn't so heartless. It is totally that he DOES NOT eat without her regardless of whether it's take out or home cooked. After all, what kind of a couple doesn't eat together? 🥺❤️

I see Small World Bucky as a rather chill and laid-back kinda guy (I mean that isn't much different from canon Bucky I think) but you best believe the first few days of his prison food (if he even went there, that is 👀) was eaten by the walls and the floor. He just got betrayed by his future wife who he cannot eat without. Of course he's not just gonna say grace and enjoy the shitty slammer food 🙄

Thank you for your kind words, they are really heart warming and definitely uplifting. I do have to agree with you about what you said about response and feedback. But I also kinda dislike my writing and don't understand why people like it 💀 I've tried to stop many times but I can't. It's probably because I am a literature major and I compare these to the stuff I study and of course fanfic can never compare to those and English isn't even my first language but I can't help it still.

I am not sure about a 'break' because sometimes I feel like taking one but then I come back because I enjoy writing stories and being delulu hehe. Your words really do mean a lot to me and thank you again for taking the time to write such a sweet ask to me ilysm 🩷🩷🩷

You can interact with me however you feel comfy, I don't mind. Although I am not someone who likes to vent or talk about things because I feel like it doesn't actually solve anything 💀😂 yeah I am a pessimist like that. That's one of the reasons exactly why I stress rant in a cryptic way so it's not so out there but I can still get it out of me. Though the fact that you said you'll miss me is making me so 🥺🥺🩷🩷

Also please never apologize again for writing a lengthy ask to me. I am the same way and I do not mind it at all 🩷

[hawkins-hero]

1, 4, 9 & 16? for stranger things (obvs)

Bless you, anon. I was hoping I'd get some asks from this one.

What OTPs in your fandom(s) do you just not get? My two big ones are Harringrove & Mileven. Harringrove is just so fucking toxic imo and as someone who rps Steve, there's literally no world I can picture where he'd be interested in someone that threatened his kids and almost killed him. Like sorry, but that's a no. And Mileven is just... idk. I think they've run their course and they were cute for a minute, but El spent so long being unable to experience a real life, and I think she needs space to become a person in her own right. I'm biased as a Byler truther, but I also just really feel like El deserves a chance to grow and get to know herself without worrying about the expectations that come from being in a relationship. 4. Do you have a NoTP in your fandom? Are they a popular OTP?Thankfully they don't seem to be popular at all, but romantic Stobin is a giant NoTP for me. Like Robin literally, explicitly states that she's into girls and while she might not say the word 'lesbian', we all know exactly what her conversation with Steve in the Starcourt bathroom means. The fact that people are willing to bend that to fit their narrative and make Stobin romantic grosses me out to the core. They literally have the perfect relationship on the show, and there's no romance required for it to be the case. 9. Most disliked character(s)? Why? Billy Hargrove, hands down. I know he saved El & the rest of the kids in the end, but one good act doesn't absolve someone for all the other truly shitty things they've done in the past. Like I already mentioned, he nearly killed Steve... he was ready to do serious harm to Lucas, treated Max like absolute shit, and was generally just a racist fuck. Yes, I know his dad was the worst, but as someone who also had an abusive parent, it's not enough in my eyes to excuse everything that he did. 16. If you could change anything in the show, what would you change? This one is so obvious, but I would absolutely not have killed Eddie. Not only is it a tired plot at this point since they introduce someone quirky and loveable every season and then promptly kill them off a few episodes later (fingers crossed that Robin has lesbian plot armor), but he was also just a great addition to the group of older teens. As someone who is stupidly partial to Steve, I absolutely loved that Eddie was so soft with him and never made him feel like he was an idiot or wasn't good enough. Dissertations have been written about how he was the first person who didn't immediately remind Steve that he used to be a terrible person, so I won't really ramble about that... I'll just reiterate that it's true. I also loved that he showed people it's okay to not always get it right the first time (or two) but that they shouldn't give up. He could have easily dropped out and tried to get his GED instead of suffering through school, but he didn't. He didn't think he was brave, but he was wrong because that was something that took a different kind of bravery than what people like Steve or Nancy show. (I would also make the show gayer. Canon Steddie, Ronance, and Byler please & thanks).

Please ask me other shit, y'all. I love doing these.

[shawn-is-my-giant-jellybean]

ONLY WANT YOU.

Pairing : Shawn Mendes × reader

Genre : Angst, smut, fluff

Warnings : Swearing, Daddy kink, thigh riding, unprotected sex, dom!Shawn, Self depreciation(very mild), oral (male receiving)

Summary : The reader and Shawn have an intense argument and then Shawn let's the reader know who's the one he wants.

You were more than worried now. It had been precisely 2 hours 14 minutes since Shawn left. You really managed to send him over the edge. You didn't want to. You didn't mean it. But you can't help it when all of the world is pining for what's not true. He's yours but no, everyone wants him and camila to be together.

Camila was such a lovely lady. You couldn't help but feel insecure. She was everything you'd want to be. Hell, she was beautiful and the worst part you wanted to hate her but you couldn't. She had that aura.

You and Shawn were in it for long. That's what you thought at least. You knew he was the one for you. And you believed you were too for him until recently.

Ever since the PR began after Senorita was out you couldn't help but question everything. Your bond with Shawn seemed to weaken. You found yourself distancing from him. You didn't want to. You never did. Everytime you saw an article in some shitty tabloid your breath got caught. You felt you couldn't breathe. You knew it was fake but guess these two were really good actors cause it didn't seem unreal it to you.

You tried to calm yourself. Remind yourself you were overanalysing the sitch. He is your boyfriend. He will be home soon. Then you can be in his strong arms and feel safe and secure. But none of it worked.

All this while, since the PR managers suggested this, Shawn had made sure to get you involved. Let you be a part of everything that's been happening or is going to in future. Make sure you're comfortable with it. And boy, did you say yes cause you didn't wanna hold him down. But now when he was not with you for the holidays, when he had to fly out every weekend to Miami you felt your nerves kick in.

You hated yourself for being such a hypocrite. Shawn never once made you feel secluded but your overthinker ass ravaged everything.

You were certain he hated you now. This was the longest you two had gone without talking after that intense a fight.

Shawn was back home after three months. You were so excited for him to be with you for a whole week now, until you saw that article. You knew it meant nothing but seeing your boyfriend sticking his tongue down another women's throat got the best of you. You didn't think it was going to affect you so bad when you said yes to the whole PR stuff but now you just didn't know how to feel.

You never told Shawn when your anxiety kicked in seeing him with her because you didn't want to seem like a hypocrite. But weren't you one?

You just suffered quietly. Tried to let it pass. It'd end soon. That's how you always calmed your raging nerves. You became quieter. Stopped being your bubbly self when Shawn called. He obviously noticed. He knew you better than you yourself. He just couldn't figure the issue cause you had so convincingly persuaded him to believe you were fine with it all.

"Hun, I'm home. " Shawn said as he closed the door after settling his luggage beside the shoe cabinet right at the entrance of your shared apartment.

When he got no response he was stressed. He expected you to pounce on him as soon as he opened the gate but there was no sign of you.

He kicked his shoes off and then remembered how it'd annoy you so much, laughed to himself and went back to put them in the cabinet before calling out for you again.

"Y/N, baby I'm home. "

He checked the living room. You weren't there. The kitchen next. No sign of you anywhere. He didn't expect you to be asleep cause it was just 7 and you were a night owl getting all pumped with energy as the clock hit 6 pm. This was your best time of the day and Shawn certainly had decided to make the best of it but you were nowhere to be found.

He wouldn't lie he was disappointed when you didn't fling yourself into his arms and peppered his face with cute wet kisses and were all clingy and lovey with him. He missed you so much.

He went to your bedroom, your shared room. Checked the whole house but there was no sign of you. He felt all that excitement dial down.

He decided to call you, obviously.

You didn't pick up.

He was worried now. He called your best friend cause you usually liked to hangout with her at evenings like this, discussing your medical school stuff and just chilling at times. She didn't pick up either. He called your mom and she told him that you were out with Y/F/N and she thought that he already knew.

Shawn was more than upset. He felt a little angry because you had been acting so not yourself and this was the least he could expect from you. There was something wrong obviously but why wouldn't you talk to him. Every time he tried to talk, you'd just make some excuse. He was tired now and this was what sent him over the edge. He tried calling you after an hour again. Just to get back a text saying "I'll be home late. Dinner's in the fridge. Don't wait for me. "

He was pissed off. Really bad.

You came home around 10:30 at night. You knew this wasn't fair to Shawn. After you saw that article you just couldn't. You had to let some seam off. Y/F/N called you and asked you if you'd wanna come to a small party they were throwing for Tom, a batchmate of yours Shawn had a huge disliking towards. Tom had asked you out cause he didn't know you had a boyfriend and he made it very clear that he liked you a lot. Shawn didn't take that well, obviously. He hated Tom's guts.

You wanted to get on his nerves after seeing the article. So you did.

You put on your sexiest one piece Shawn got for you year on your graduation day. The nerve of you. You informed your mom cause you knew Shawn would call her as you didn't plan on picking up his phone.

You opened the door with your key. The click noise made Shawn wake up from his light slumber.

You knew you had pulled off real shit and well consequences weren't gonna be good.

As you went inside. You saw the food was out on the counter but untouched. Shawn was in the living room, glaring at you.

"Where were you, Y/N? " He asked you with a voice dangerously low sending chills down your spine.

But heh you had enough liquid courage to be a douche at this point.

"Hello to you too. " You said in a rude tone.

"I said where the fuck were you, Y/N? It's been three goddamn hours. I have been so stressed what the hell is wrong with you. You didn't even care to tell me yourself. What the fuck?" He snapped at you moving towards you in the kitchen where you were pouring some water for yourself.

" I was at Tom's birthday party with Y/F/N." You said non chalantly.

His eyes shot up. Going wide.

" So you decided to go to that fucker's party instead of being with me. I'm home after three fucking months for fuck's sake." He yelled from across the counter.

You flinched hearing his tone but snapped right back. "Well what am I supposed to do Shawn? Sit here like a fool while you stick your tongue down her throat. All I see are pictures of you two making out every fucking where so am I just supposed to fucking wait for you after getting ten thousand notifications showing my boyfriend and his fucking girlfriend!? "

He took in a deep breath as if to not do anything wrong. The change on his face was scary. He just went from angry and worried to nothing. His face went expressionless. The tension getting thicker with every passing second.

You realised how wrong you were instantly. Hands flying to cover your mouth. " Shawn, i-... I am.. I didn't mean it. Bab-"

"You fucking meant it, Y/N. I can't even. You've got to be kidding me. " He took his Jeep's keys and headed for the gate. You tried to stop him by touching his shoulder but the look he gave you made you feel disgusted with yourself. He slammed the gate as he went out. Tears made their way down your cheeks smudging all your make up.

You sank down right where you were beside the kitchen counter. You hated yourself in this moment more than you ever had. The one person who always put your needs first, cared for you more than himself, you managed to make him hate you. You were certain he did.

You ran took your phone called Shawn. Over and over again. 5 calls went unanswered. You were perturbed. Didn't know what to do. Didn't know where he could be. You wanted to just be in his arms. You didn't deserve it but you felt home. His arms were your home. And you just ruined it all. Your baseless insecurities did.

You sat there helpless, loathing yourself. You don't know when sleep took over you. When you woke up it was 12. You got up in haste, drowning in worry. It had been an hour and a half since he left. You called him again and again to no avail. You lost the best thing you ever had and you knew you wouldn't be able to live with yourself after what you did.

You decided leaving was the best. He anyway wouldn't want you near him. Shawn deserved the world. He deserved the best. And then there was you who gave him nothing but hurled insults at him.

Tears didn't stop flowing at a point you felt you didn't have anymore left but you were wrong. You went up to your bedroom. Taking out a suitcase. You didn't want to bother him more. You weren't worth it.

You put in your essentials in the bag, moving to the closet after that. You changed into one of your hoodies. It was his. All of your clothes were basically his. You needed to wear them to feel home when he wasn't around. He loved them on you but now you weren't so sure. You anyway did it. One hoodie wouldn't upset him.

As you were done packing you checked the time it was over 2 hours. You wanted to die right at this moment. Shawn was not picking up your calls. You called Geoff earlier, he had no idea where Shawn was. Now you decided to call Karen. You didn't know what to do. You had already asked Andrew if Shawn was at the studio. You didn't want to stress everywhere cause Shawn didn't get mad easily but when he did it was bad. Extremely bad.

Just as you were about to call Karen you felt yourself being turned around, moved towards the closet door, a pair of strong arms pulling you and then his warm swollen lips being attached to yours. You melted right then. You didn't know how to respond. You couldn't believe it. Were you dreaming? But as you let it sink in, it was your Shawn kissing you. His smell invaded your senses making you feel alive again. Those lips moulded with yours felt like heaven. Tears made their way out of your eyes again. Lips starting to move against his. Hands going into his hair tugging at it as he devoured you. You didn't realize he was crying too until you opened your eyes. His eyes blood shot, cheeks tear stained. You hated you were the reason for his disheveled state. You hated yourself.

You broke the kiss. Not being able to look him in the eyes. Trying to catch your breath.

After a few minutes of total silence you figured this was goodbye. You started moving towards your suitcase.

As he saw what you were doing he let out a loud groan. He wanted to knock some sense into you and he decided he will.

He held your arm pulling you towards himself, asking with a hoarse voice "Where do you think you are going? "

"I'm sorry, Shawn. I just....you deserve better. I'll leave, I wanted to ask you if I can take this one hoodie? If you want it back I understand. I just didn't mean to hurt you. I didn't mean anything I said earlier. It just I was a little drunk you know it's I'm so terribly sorry. " You rambled didn't realising when you started sobbing.

You felt his arms wrap around you. Engulfing you in a loving hug. You broke down. He was still being so considerate when all you did was break his heart.

"Shush honey. Y/N, I am right here. You're not going anywhere."

"I am sorry. So sorry. I-.. I'll leave. "

"Baby, I said you are not going anywhere. I need you hun. You remember, it's forever." He said in his beautiful voice showing you his promise ring. The one you got him three months back. Just before he left.

You looked up at him through your crys. You wanted to see if he hated you or not. He could lie to you but his eyes could never. To your surprise all you saw was worry and love. A sense of relief washed over you. You released a breath you didn't know you were holding all this while.

"I love you baby. We are okay. I'm sorry I shouldn't have left like this."

"No no no Shawn. You.. I.... I'm so fucking terrible. I didn't mean anything earlier. I just wanted to I don't know I'm a fool. I was so scared I lost you forever. I'm so sorry. I love you so much. "

"No bub, I get where you're coming from. I understand. Just seeing you go to his birthday party made my blood boil. Seeing me with Camila, making out, holding hands I get it. I'm sorry. You should have told me, Y/N. I always wanted you to be comfortable with it. Although I shouldn't have put you in that spot when I know you won't ever say anything that's not in favour of my career. "

" I just didn't wanna hold you back, Shawn. I knew it was important but seeing you with her I just can't help but compare myself to her. I'm so pathetic. I hate myself. "

" Hey don't you ever say that about my baby. She's the best. Okay? Most beautiful, most caring, loving, selfless and she has the best legs. Her ass is so sexy. Her curves. Those lips I never wanna let go off. " He said his hands on your ass massaging it. You let out a low moan. It had been so long.

You wanted Shawn more than anything . His head dipped down to your neck, your head falling back. It felt unreal to be this close to him again. Especially after that sick stunt you pulled off.

He bit you at your soft spot and you jumped in his arms making him chuckle. He licked it to soothe it and you moaned. Not being able to control how overwhelmed you were after months of no physical contact with him.

"By the way that dress, baby. Not a smart move wearing it to Tom's birthday party, was it? " He said as his hands creeped up inside your hoodie sending shivers up your spine.

You just moaned in response only to receive a light tug at your bum.

"Words, honey. Use your words with me. " He said in that deep voice making your knees turn into jelly.

"Yes daddy. It was so stupid of me. Sorry daddy. " You said in your most innocent voice. Eyes looking glossy.

Shawn literally lost it there. Letting out a low growl. " Fuck Y/N." He turned you around. Making you face the mirror on your vanity. Your ass pressed onto his front. You could feel him already getting hard against your thigh. "Say it again." He commanded in a low voice. So you did feeling yourself getting wet. The pool in your panties becoming larger. "Mmm Daddy." You moaned as he moved your hair onto one side tilting your head so that he could assault your neck again. He knew how much you loved it when he did this.

"You know I wanted to take you right when you entered the house. Looking so pretty in that dress. Daddy got so worked up, baby. Only if you weren't being an annoying little brat." He said bringing his hand on your left boob cupping it under your hoodie.

"No bra? You're being very naughty I see."

"Sorrrryyy daddy. Sorry for being a little brat. I need you, daddy." You couldn't take his assault anymore. You whined. You just wanted him to fuck you into oblivion. Wanted him to be rough with you. Wanted to be close to him. As close that even air couldn't get in between the two of you.

"My hun is eager, I see. What do you want honey?" He asked.

"Want daddy to fuck me. Hard." You answered. Your eyes closed as he played with your tits. You could already feel yourself dripping on your thigh.

"Fuck baby. Getting daddy so hard huh? But do you deserve it after what you did."

"No daddy I have been bad. Very bad." You said. Extremely excited for what was in store for you. Shawn being a little rough and dominant always got you in the mood no matter when and where. That was his effect. The fact that only you got to see this side of the otherwise always a sweetheart gentle giant Shawn worked wonders on you. You loved it and he knew that.

"Hmm so kitten what is your punishment then?" Shawn whispered in your left ear. Making goosebumps arise on your body.

"Spanks, daddy. I have to count."

"Mm look at you being so good. How many do you deserve baby? "

"6 daddy? "

"Isn't that very less for what you did hun? Make it 10."

"Okay daddy."

He tugged at your hands as an indication for you to raise them so that he could take off his large hoodie of you. Leaving you only in your black lace panties. Looking at your almost naked body, Shawn couldn't help the moan that escaped his lips. Hands immediately cupping both your boobs. "So beautiful kitten."

"Thank you, daddy."

He proceeded on to take off his shirt. His biceps flexing in the process making your mouth water. You still were in a haze. This man, literally Adonis was yours? How'd you get so lucky? His flawless skin. The little hair peppering his chest. The defined pecs. His abs. You didn't even realise you were gawking at him. Literally with your mouth open. A chuckle brought you back to reality. Getting flushed instantly.

"Mmm definitely enjoying what you see hun. Come here." He said sitting at the edge of the bed opening his legs so that you could bend over his thighs. You did as told.

"Want these off baby. " He tugged at your panties. Before you could even move to get them off. He ripped them apart in half as if it was nothing. You got wetter if that was possible.

"Now bend." He said. You did as told. You bent over his lap.

"Count baby." He growled as his hand slapped your right ass cheek. A loud moan leaving your lips. "One."

Another spank at the same place. Making it become an angry red. "Two." You whined.

Shawn saw your wetness dripping down your thighs forcing a strangled moan out of him. His fingers immediately going to your freshly shaved pussy lips. "You are enjoying this so much kitten? " He asked as his fingers dipped in your folds, you almost screaming at the sudden action, then he took them in his mouth. You sublimated right that moment. If this wasn't the hottest thing you'd ever seen you didn't know what was. You felt pure bliss.

Still in that euphoria you didn't realize how time passed and his hand came in contact with your ass again. Harder than before.

"Three." You cried. Your ass blood red. Tears threatening to fall out of your eyes any second. Just for a second Shawn's demeanor faltered. He seemed to be having second thoughts. He couldn't hurt you. His hand soothingly titillating the area.

You, as if, read his thoughts and told him to continue. "It hurts so good, daddy." That was all he needed. "You're doing so good kitten. Just two more." With that his hand came down again not so hard this time. You moaned, loving the burning sensation.

He repeated the same with your left cheek. You started to cry by the time he was done. He took you in his arms. Making you face him. Straddling his lap. "Did so good for me baby." You rested your head on his shoulder. Your bare pussy against the rough fabric of his jeans. His thick thighs clenching. And you started to grind your self on his thigh. You didn't even realise when. The pleasure seeming to only increase with each thrust of your hips. You let out a moan at the same time as Shawn, it's what made reality dawn upon you. Your actions halted thinking he'd want to punish you, maybe.

When you looked into his eyes, they were darker than before, almost black, filled with insatiable hunger. A wave of confidence hit you. Your movements resumed. Your pace a little faster now. Your hands made way around his neck, wrapping them for support as he held you by your waist. His eyes boring into yours, you felt yourself melt. "I want you to get off my thigh, Y/N. Don't stop until you cum." He said in a voice that was enough to do it for you. He sounded so fucking sexy you couldn't even make sense of it. "Okay daddy." With that you increased your pace. His toned muscles flexing with your movements. It felt like heaven. You felt the fire burn in you. That familiar pit. Shawn kept on cooing filthy things in your ear sending you over the edge even faster. You held onto him for dear life as you came, nails digging in his skin. This was different. The way he responded to your actions. It felt unreal. It was beyond amazing.

"Felt so good daddy." You said as you went to kiss him. He captured your lips with his, kissing you with burning passion. You poured all your apologies, how ashamed you were of your unreasonable behavior, your unconditional love for him, all in that kiss. It conveying more than you could vocally have.

"Look at you hun, ruined daddy's pants huh? Looked like a goddess getting off of my thigh. You like it?"

"Loved it daddy. I love 'em."

He wrapped your legs around his waist as if you weighed nothing, standing up. He threw you on the bed. Taking his pants off along with his boxers. His thick member sprang out of the confines hitting his abdomen making the most unholy noise. You almost gasped at how terribly hard he was. It must be painful.

You scooted closer to him on the bed, reaching the edge. "Can I taste you, daddy? "

"Fuck. Go ahead baby."

"Mmm okay." You said as you reached for him. Getting in between his thighs. Making him sit on the bed and getting on your knees on the floor. You wanted to make him feel just as good as you felt. And boy were you determined.

You took his length in your hands. Spreading the precum all over it and your lips pulling out a pornographic moan off him. He stared at you in awe. Looking so pretty with his cock in your hands, on your knees for him. So wet, your juices dripping everywhere. It was nasty and he loved it.

You took his balls in your mouth, caressing his cock, all the prominent veins and the angry red tip making you salivate. You started running your hands up and down him. Sucking his balls. "Fuck honey, so good. Go on." He caressed your hair. "Always so good for me." You released his balls from your mouth with a pop sound and licked his underside from the base to the tip, feeling each vein. You took his tip in your mouth making him almost stop breathing. "Such a good girl, Y/N. Doing amazing." He moaned. It felt like music to your ears. You finally took him all in. He let out a loud whine. The warmth of your mouth making him dizzy. You started moving your head faster, almost releasing him fully then taking as much of him as you could until he hit the back of your throat. You loved giving Shawn a head. Hell you loved doing everything to him. Anything you did for him, with him was automatically your favorite. You felt what a dumbass you were to even think of leaving him. He's the best thing that has happened to you ever. He's your present and your future. You can't let yourself ruin that. Shawn abruptly stopped you. Pulling himself out of your mouth. You gave him a confused look. "What's wrong, Shawn?" "Not gonna last long, baby. Wanna feel you. Be inside you. Come here." He scooped you in his arms. Made you lay on the bed facing the vanity mirror. He came up beside you. His large body engulfing you as he spooned you. You reached down taking him in your hands, not being able to take anymore teasing. You needed him in you. Wanted to feel full again. It almost felt like the first time today. Your emotions all over the place, being so raw. You loved every microsecond of it. You lined him with yourself, almost about to take him in when Shawn took control. "Calm down. You know Y/N, good girls don't behave like this." "Sorry." You mumbled grumpily. His hand wrapped around your throat. Pressing lightly. Fuck, you got wetter if that was humanely even possible. You felt you might cum right then. "Sorry, what honey? Be good." "Sorry Daddy." "Mmm better." He said as he rubbed his tip at your slit. Teasing you like always. "So wet for me, honey. You've ruined all the sheets." You just moaned loudly in response incapable of forming a coherent sentence. He slowly pushed inside you. He was so fucking big. It hurt. He stretched you out so well. Relief washing you over. Feeling him in you made you feel complete. He stilled once he was inside letting you adjust. "Move baby? " He asked. "Mmm fuck. Yes daddy." You said.

His hand moved from your throat to your clit, rubbing you as he fucked you hard from behind. Your eyes started to close which as soon as he noticed he stopped. You whined so loudly at this it was almost shocking for you. "Open your eyes, baby if you want me to continue. Watch us in the mirror. Watch how daddy fucks you so good." And you saw the most obscene sight. His one hand rubbing your clit. You could see his cock move in and out of you. Other hand on your left boob pressing it hard. You couldn't help but whimper at the beautiful view. So dirty. You loved it.

His pace got faster as he dipped his neck into the crook of your neck leaving hickeys. Your hand reaching back holding onto his arm. Your nails scratching him, digging into his skin.

The feeling of bliss took over you as you yelled "I'm going to cum, Shawn." "Come for me, honey. I'm gonna cum too." His pace faltered becoming slower. He was close too. He rubbed your little nub faster, the nerves started burning at his assault.

"Aaah fuck fuck fuck daddy." With that you came all over him, him following you almost instantly. He let out a grunt as he came inside you, filling you up. Riding you both to the end of your orgasms.

He stayed like that for a few minutes. Not moving at all. Then he pulled out of you. Getting up to go to the bathroom like he always did. He came back with a wet towel, cleaning you up so gently. Then he cleaned himself up with the same towel. And you don't know but this always felt so intimate to you. More than all that you guys just did. Him cleaning you both up with the same towel made your heart flutter. You were so fallen for him you didn't know yourself.

He came back after dumping the towel with the dirty laundry.

As soon as he came to bed, you snuggled into his chest. He was your home. You felt so safe. No one could hurt you with him there. Not even you, yourself. He'd protect you.

A single tear slipped from your eye as you both lay in comfortable silence cuddled with each other. As he noticed it, in the sweetest voice ever he said "It's okay baby. You don't have to even think about what happened earlier, again. I knew it'd affect you badly and I still went for it. I knew if I asked you, you'd never say no. So it was me taking you for granted, hun. You're not at fault. It was me, baby. I put you in that spot."

"Oh shut up, Mendes. Always making me seem so good. It was my and only my fault. Don't you dare blame it on yourself. And I'm so so sorry. I won't ever doubt what we have. It's the most real thing I have felt in my whole 22 years of existence. I love you so much, words can't even express it."

"But you do in other ways. You know." He smirked making you roll your eyes, nudging him lightly in his chest.

"You riding my thigh was the most fucking hot view ever. Trust me, I almost came."

"Oh shut it and let me sleep." You said all flustered about what you did.

"One last thing, baby. "

"Hmm? "

"You're the only one I want. "

You cuddled more into him finally being able to fall asleep soundly in your home.

Taglist: @monikamendes @holland-styles @bvttercupbby @lonelyreputation @badreputationlove @shawn-youth @itsalwaysbeen305 @perfectlywrongsm @particularnarry @wholesomemendes @myboyshawn @myboyshawnie @imaginashawnns @camilalewiss @swiftmendeshoran @princecharmingmendes @fallinallincurls @glitterypositivityforaesthetic @shawnpetermuffins @stylesharrys @shawnblanc @shawn-mendes-thirst @shawnftchris @lonelyreputation

Tell me guys if anyone wants to be added or removed from the taglist.

Also this is my first time writing on tumblr so i dont know if I did any stupidities please let me know if I did 🥺🥺

And How'd you guys like the shot? I'd really appreciate if you all leave feedbacks. Thank you lovelies! ❣

[duskwood-by-daylight]

Long Day

Based the day after the rehearsal dinner, slightly paraphrased from canon conversation, Marco wants to talk.

Warnings: cursing, I despise this man

Word count:650ish

A/N: I didn't have as much anger in this one as I wanted. Maybe the next one. As always, 18+, minors DNI. Don't steal or copy or whatever. Feedback always appreciated.

"It's been a long day, always ain't that right," you sing along with Rob Thomas, feeling the lyrics in your soul. Work has been an absolute nightmare lately, but especially today. All you want is to get home, stuff your face, and finish reading your new book. Taylor offered to bring over some take out and you're still considering his offer, having told him you'll text when you're finally home. You drum your steering wheel in time with the music until suddenly it stops, interrupted by a call. 

Marco. 

If you rolled your eyes any harder, they'd fall out of your head and roll down the street. Well, this day can't get worse. "Hello?"

"Hey, did I catch you at a bad time?" Hearing his pathetic tone through your speakers makes you wanna bail out of the car, traffic be damned.

"I'm driving home."

"Oh," he simpers, "I can call you later."

"Well, I'm having dinner with Taylor later, so we might as well talk now."

"Oh." That sounded a little more unhappy. "I just wanted to make sure you were okay after the other night. You and Taylor left in a hurry."

"Well… yeah. You and Sally were fighting and you tried to push the blame on Taylor. I figured it was best to make ourselves scarce."

"I apologize for that. I was upset."

"Accepted."

The silence hangs in the air for a moment and it isn't entirely uncomfortable, at least not for you. Marco must feel differently because he blurts out, "So will you still be part of the wedding? Please?"

Sally despises me. I don't like you. Why on earth would I, other than to make sure you get married and out of my life? "On one condition. After this wedding, we're done."

"What?"

"I'm tired. I'm tired of all this back and forth and complete nonsense with you people. It's like a merry-go-round in Hell."

"I can't agree to that. I can't let you go."

You sigh, parking your car in your designated space. Maybe it won't be up to you, Marco. I was only doing this to help Taylor and now I'm just trying to get out. "Okay."

"You know I'll respect your decision, even if it kills me. I know I haven't been the best friend to you lately. Dragging you into all of my relationship problems, ignoring boundaries, being jealous of Taylor… I'm sorry. I don't think anyone in the world is good enough for you."

"Not even yourself?" His apology comes as a surprise. Marco is typically too self absorbed to see any further than his own wants and needs. This sudden change of heart has you more suspicious than anything. He has to want something.

"You deserve a lot better than someone who fantasizes about being with someone else the week of their wedding." He's quiet and something tells you this is Marco at his most honest. You lean back in your seat, waiting for him to continue. "I know it's wrong but if I don't say this now, I never will. I'm still in love with you." 

It's lucky that you've already parked because otherwise you would have run off the road. You knew, of course you knew, but you never thought he'd have the courage to just come out with it. It doesn't matter.  "Excuse me?"

He sighs heavily and seems to be waiting for you to say something else. You don't. "I know this is shitty timing and I should've said something before. Sally isn't in love with me, she's in love with the idea of a wedding, of having her picture perfect life. I can't be happy and be with her."

"... does this admission change anything?"

"It changes everything, doesn't it?"

"It doesn't for me. It isn't up to me whether you marry Sally or not. Nor is it up to Taylor. I'm gonna give you some advice. You're both grown adults and you need to act like it. Talk to each other and really listen. Be honest. Stop waiting for your friends to fix this for you. And if neither of you can stop being selfish, at least stop being stupid. This one sounds like a personal problem, Marco."

By the time you hang up and make it inside your apartment, your rage has given way to exhaustion. You do manage to text Taylor, telling him that Marco is still an ass and to come over please. Pretending to date Taylor is suspiciously like actually dating Taylor, but those emotions are for later. For now, you'll settle for having Greek takeout with a like-minded fake boyfriend who at least has a good sense of humor.

[vole-mon-amour]

OTP tag game.

Tagged by @captainjowl. You know for sure than I'm struggling to pick only 10 & fit them in here. But hell, that’s fun, thank you <3

Rules: Choose 10 OTPs BEFORE reading the questions, and then get to answering

1) Harry James Potter & Sirius Orion Black

2) Daniel Le Domas & Grace (Ready or Not 2019)

3) Samuel & Nathan Drake (Uncharted 4)

4) Corvo Attano & The Outsider (+probably Emily Kaldwin; Dishonored series)

5) Steve Grant Rogers & Bucky Buchanan Barnes (Marvel)

6) Tony Edward Stark & Peter Benjamin Parker (Marvel)

7) Handsome Jack & Rhys (Borderlands video game series)

8) Damon Salvatore & Elena Gilbert (TVD Books & a tv show)

9) Batman & Joker (in every universe, really)

10) Adam Jensen x Francis Pritchard (Deus Ex video game series)

1. Do you remember the episode/scene/chapter that you first started shipping 6?

I believe it didn't hit me before Spider-Man: Homecoming. Civil War was about Steve & Bucky for me, but when I saw that growing up Peter with Tony, their dynamic, chemistry. Tom & Robert are really just like that.

2. Have you ever read a fanfic about 2?

Lmao. I've read like 50% of the tag on AO3, I wrote my own & started a few wips on them. They are amazing. Plus, with that shitty canon? We didn't get enough of them & they deserved better, so it's only logical to save yourself with fanfiction.

3. Has a picture of 4 ever been your screen saver/profile picture/tumblr screen saver?

I was living with The Outsider icon on my twitter & tumblr. That one is still my Google profile picture I believe. Don't remember about having an icon with the two of them. Also had The Outsider as my lockscreen on my smartphone for a while.

4. If 7 were to suddenly break up today, what would your reaction be?

Funny how it fits canon, lmao. Rhys literally tried to erase Jack's AI in TFTBL, so I guess another day on Pandora, nothing new. They torture each other, they kiss each other, they kill other people in the process. It'll be fiiine.

5. Why is 1 so important?

I love them since the first time I met them, which was much more than 10 years ago, I don't even remember when. At some point they were the reason I was waking up & forcing myself to eat just to read more fanfiction & feel something. Even if I was drowning in pain (I was extremely depressed), it was still something. I read every fic I could find at that time. The depression that Harry went through, all these feelings, his love for Sirius. I was living through it, I could relate.

I'm currently drowning in these two again, though in a much healthier & happier state. I see their flaws & I know as much as I can. I see them differently as an adult. They saved me, they keep being my number one, I still consider making a tattoo of Padfoot/Sirius or of both Harry & Sirius together. I have many headcanons, ideas, I write fics about them. They are everything, you see? They were my choice when there was nothing, no one. They are HOME.

6. Is 9 a funny ship or a serious ship?

Both. There goes the dynamic of Jack & Rhys: torture, fighting, flirting, a lot of trauma. I'd definitely say that they are wild and comical sometimes, but they are definitely serious. With the Asylum, the mental health issues. There is so much more to it, the complexity of their relationship. The struggle of loving who you probably shouldn't (but hey, when does it work like that?) Thinking about Tettlate's Batman, about Batman: Europa & how Joker was: "You must be crazy, putting me in charge of the plan, letting me decide. Okay, well..."

Nah, they are entertaining, but this is a serious ship.

7. Out of all the ships listed, which ship has the most chemistry?

Are you kidding me? They are all the definition of CHEMISTRY. I'd say 5, but then go 2, 6, 7, 8. Come on. I'm not choosing. Most of they are WILD.

9. How many times have you read/watched the 10’s fandom?

The fandom itself? Idk. I found one of my favourite artists through this fandom. If it's about the characters themselves, I played the first game with the DLC from start to beginning, looking around every corner. Spent more than 60 hours in there. Watched a second game (my laptop can't run the game) and the DLC (obviously), since Francis is in the DLC & not in the main game. I have a tag for them on tumblr, I read fanfiction, I tried to write my own. I still follow Elias & want a third game. Elias liked my tweets about Adam and Jensen being an actual couple a few times. I'd say I interacted with all of this a lot? Still do, actually.

10. Which ship has lasted the longest?

5. Best friends since childhood, fought & died for each other, still found their way back to each other. "It would break your Captain's heart, to see what they did to you." That only the MENTION of Steve can pull Bucky out of this brain washing(ed?) state, distract him in the middle of a fight. When Steve died in the comics because of Sharon & Tony sent Natasha to take Steve's shield from Bucky because even Tony knew how much Steve means to Bucky. And Bucky was like: "Oh, I see what he did. Not happening!" Fought Natasha (that is his ex in the comics) & kept going for Steve's sake.

Well, you see the point, I can go on and on.

11. How many times, if ever, has 6 broken up?

They're not actually canon so none? They had a few fights: In Civil war (the comics), in Homecoming (the movie).  That only means that they’ve got history & love each other.

12. If the world was suddenly thrust into a zombie apocalypse, which ship would make it out alive, 2 or 8?

As fierce Grace is, they wouldn't stand a chance against Damon & Elena. Those two had to deal with worst thing than brainless stupid zombies. On the other hand, if there were no alive humans to drink their blood... It's either an animal diet that Damon hates so much or I don't know? Still, they're faster & more powerful. Their bodies have advantage of healing the wounds as well.

13. Did 7 ever have to hide their relationship for any reason?

From some people, yeah. Don't tell Athena, don't tell Vaughn, don't tell Fiona. Though Rhys wasn't very subtle about it & Jack just doesn't give a fuck. You will probably end up dead if you disagree or bore him, or if you're useless.

"I can take you to the top, but you gotta know where the top is" & Rhys doesn't tell anybody until Jack makes him the President for like whole 20 minutes lol.

Fiona & Sasha: "This can't be happening." Sure it can, darling.

14. Is 4 still together?

I have a headcanon about The Outsider finding Emily & Corvo after Billie frees him from the Void. He doesn't have anybody & they are his only friends aside from a potential friendship with Billie. And if we don't consider TOTO dlc, they definitely are! The Outsider visits them both when they sleep & takes them to the void sometimes. How could he not?

15. Is 10 canon?

Not really but also sort of? Let's say that they really care about each other in canon, despite Adam pushing Francis away because of his trauma & fear that Megan caused him. :/

16. If all 10 ships were put into a couple’s Hunger Games, which couple would win?

Can you imagine wizards fighting extremely powerful vampires? Superheroes with venom in their bodies that make them super strong with people that made a deal with the Devil himself (hi Le Bail)? 5000 y.o. God and his lover that share his powers and an augmented human protecting his tired IT guy? Combine mental health issues to that, Jack and Rhys with Batman and Joker. Corvo & The Outsider would probably slay them all as Corvo and Emily did in both games with entire islands, though it will still be a slaughter anyway.

17. Has anybody ever tried to sabotage 5’s ship?

All the fucking time, lmaooo. I’m not even talking about it.

18. Which ship would you defend to the death and beyond?

I feel like I already did with Steve & Bucky after many Marvel movies (we're not even mentioning Endg*me, I fucking died & was dead for full 4-5 months).

19. Do you spend hours a day going through 3’s tumblr page?

I used to do that a few years back, but not anymore. There is not much content since the trilogy is finished.

20. If an evil witch descended from the sky and told you that you had to pick one of the ten ships to break up forever or else she’d break them all forever, which ship would you sink?

1 already went through it & fandom lives, so I'd say maybe 7? Rhys will find a way to bring Jack back & they are both so wild. It’s what happened in canon anyway. Jack kidnapped Lilith & forced her to do Angel's job, so I'd like to see that witch try at first. Jack is an immortal bastard. <3

Now that I think about it, Corvo would also deal with her in seconds as she waits to curse them.

As a conclusion: no one breaks up forever, we're killing the witch.

I tag: @ianmillkovichgallagher​ & @aledbr​

Whoever else wants to join the game, please do.

[i-hate-everyone--equal]

After having a very rough life that makes her want to risk it all at the age of 12. Elaina receives a call from her older brother begging for help with his new born daughter. After watching the fiasco Ari and Aaliyah, her little sisters started in Crenshaw and knowing they needed to lay low for a long time. They head to a Freeridge California and meet a little beat up boy named Cesar. After awhile they start to rebuild the never put together family that she's always wanted but what happens when his older brother finally gets out of jail?

Show some love if you like it! I do not own on my block or any of its characters. I only own my own ocs. I also dont own the pictures. If you don't like the book don't read it and I'm always welcome to nice criticism but if your an ass you will be removed. I also dont speak spanish so I'm gonna do the best I can.

...................................................................

Driving to get to my new house in Freeridge was tiring as hell with my mija in the car. Dont get me wrong I know this is the first time we've got to spend time together in awhile but, I also know the girls hyped her up on candy and soda from the way she practically vibrating and jumping in her purple and black car seat. Fortunately she crashed from her sugar high about 40 minutes back and I would be able to carry her big head into the house.

Tapping my hand in the steering wheel, I pull through tagged up streets until I arrive at my new house in Freeridge, California. There were little trees and bushes blocking all edges of the house at the end of the street giving it a very good privacy setting. Its walls a off white concrete with beige tiles on the roof. There was a big yard big enough to store some of the cars Juju and I like to work on, a small garage and a doggie house for my dog Cerberus. As my eyes roam the house I let out the sigh that seems to have been on the tip of my tongue since I left my old home in Crenshaw.

I notice there were no lights on in the house and that I will have to get black out curtains, considering the amount of windows there were. It wont be good when I have to drink my self to sleep only to be woken up by the sun wanting to show how much holier it is than I. The houses off white cemented walls shined in the fading sunlight the light reflecting off the windows giving it a warm and cozy look thankfully along with the sun going down so is the famous unforgivable heat.

Stepping out of the car was a little more challenging than I thought it was going to be considering how my skin wanted to mend into the car seat. So, after I finally was able to surgically remove myself I was able to start walking up to the reinforced door one of the first things I noticed.

'That was probably one of Vin's ideas.' A bitter smile came at the thought....missing mi familia. I honestly don't even know where he is right now. 'I'll find you when it's safe again.' Already knowing the words were lies before they even left his mouth.

The second thing I notice was the cameras discreetly pointing at every angle surronding my house. So if a lizard crossed my yard I would know about it. I opened the door and propped it open with one of door stopper that was right next to it. Not even bothering to look further inside Going back to the car and I pull out mi hija without waking her while also grabbing whatever else we needed to spend one night in an empty house.

Quickly grabbing my silver .9mm from the glove department, I place it in my waist band of my black yoga shorts and start walking in the house and once fully inside, I put Nena and the bags down in the living room on the deep brown wooden floors before rubbing her hair. Glancing at her mixed cream skin with crazy black curly hair I secretly admire her beauty. 'She deserves this fresh start more than any of us. ' I quietly think to myself continuing to take in her peaceful sleeping face that looked so much like her fathers.

She has such an innocent face but, that's just what lures you in about her. She has such a devilish smile when you get past her angelic eyes.

Rubbing her hair once more I walk out and grab a few more bags before placing those bags around her as well. I go back and lock the door before going through her night bag and pulling out her pajamas.

Picking her up to wake her only causes her to start groaning and whining as she lazily opens her eyes and gives me a sweet soft kiss.

"We have to change your clothes before you go back to sleep Nena." I say quietly to the 3 year old.

"Tía" she said with her quiet rarely used voice it coming out soft and toddlerish. Her tired eyes trying to close despite my best efforts. God this girl could try to sleep through anything!

"You cant call me that anymore mija." I said to her softly with my soothing voice while looking into her deep amber eyes. My mother always said that I had the voice capable of putting anyone to sleep. I remember when I was 4 she told me one night that she wanted me to sing for her every night to chase away the nightmares. Unfortunately the next morning I found her overdosed in the tub covered in urine and throw up.

"Yes mama." She said starting to get a little excited but still in her sleep haze.

"I love you mama." Nena said burying her head into my shoulder. Secretly trying to go back to sleep from what I could tell by the way she started to slump into my arms.

"I love you too Nena. We have to get you changed before you go back to sleep plum."I said chuckling to the half asleep toddler before looking away and turning to my phone when I hear the gun shot notification. Clicking my phone on. I see a blaring picture of Nena and *Bang!!* another new text message. This one from the moving company. [ We will arrive Tomorrow at 7 am] Alright. Not that bad and there's really nothing I could do about that right now.

Scrolling to my other messages I see one from Abuela.

[ We are 30 minutes out. She is in a mood driving us all loco.] Chuckling when I finished reading.

'She just lost her sister, nana.' I thought to myself. Before shaking my head to get rid of the thoughts of her. Putting down Nena on the floor unconsciously bringing up old unwanted memories of before the beginning of all of this bullshit.

*Flashback 2 years ago*

Sitting here with my hands bruised, slashed, and bleeding all over the place from the street fights I've had that past week. The dark purple and yellow bruises seeming to do a puzzle the way they fit on top of each other.

Kissing my teeth and looking far out of space while throwing my head back, and letting out a small scream while standing up to let out my frustrations. Today was not a good day, but it seems like bad days are the only days I'm allowed to have anymore honestly. Turning my head around to fully take in my shitty surronding of an abandoned apartment building with dried blood on the walls, broken glass bottles everywhere, and dirty couches and mattresses. The whole place stunk of mold, anemone, and shit. A scoff escapes me.

'What am I even doing here?' I think to myself but in reality I already know why I was not home..... trying to get too fucked up to remember anything. This is not where I am supposed to be doing that though. I pry through the existing migraine to get to the depressing things I'm forced to call my thoughts. While pulling out my phone to check to see if I have recieved any messages, nope but it is 02:30.

'I should probably go home.' Although, as soon as that thought went though my head it was already gone. My mind being too filled with the existing numbness and static to absorb anymore thoughts of home.

Not now.... 'Theres no one there to return to anymore.'

Walking though the trashed old and moldy apartment building somewhere in NY blood territory if the tagged up place was anything to go by I stepped out side. Looking around I notice the tagged up neighborhood and my 2014 purple and black Dodge Charger. Stepping in the car with a groan I start the car and look at my phone again to connect the bluetooth and start playing Leroyce -Forever before I take off toward a destination not really caring where as long as it's not here.

Opening my glove department I pull out a blunt and light it before coming to a stop. 'Got to get off the road soon dont want to get pulled over again.' I sigh, even though I look older than it I am still only 10. One that really is tired of this worlds sandeces 'I really dont want to call Vin to tell the officer to let me go if I get caught.' I add another sigh to my day as I pull into a parking space and turning off the car. I continue to smoke my blunt while listening to the music letting it vibe though me. 'I haven't eaten in 3 days' I think with, yeah you guessed it another sigh not particularly having an appetite or craving anything to eat.

Putting out the roach that was left while also making sure my silver glock is by my side, I get out of the car and walk to the nearest store. Walking up to the 711 I open the door and notice there were three young chicos in the candy isle and an Arabian at the register. Going to the bakery isle I grab two banana nut muffins before going to grab a beer and some chips.

"Can I get a black and mild wood tip?" I asked as I walked up to the Arabian girl at the register. Her big brown eyes first going to my holstered gun before looking into my hazel green eyes. Looking like she was having a debate with herself on whether or not to ask for an armored mixed girls Id. Flipping her fake blonde hair it seems like she made the decision that she doesnt care about my life.

"That will be 9.34."

Placing a 10 on the counter I walk away leaving the change. Going straight back to my car rolling another one and, staring off into space letting my mind wonder into the depths that would only bring and leave more scars. The only thing that brings me back is the sound of my ringer going off. Looking at the screen I see a picture of my hermano Vin and I on the screen. My long curly black hair pushed to the side my eyes closed and a bright smile on my full lips showing off my pearly whites. Vins tattoed arms wrapped around his hermanita as tight as possible knowing that would be the last time we would see each other for awhile.... and it's already been 8 months. "Qué?" I demanded. As soon as I picked up the phone.

"Elaina."

"Hm?"

"Te necesito." His deep voice says hesitantly over the phone.'Really....now you need me?'

"Por qué?"

"We can't speak about it on the phone. I need you to come to me." His gravely deep voice demanded on the phone. Not really giving me a choice in the matter in my head.

But now, what could be so important that you cant tell me over the phone. Well the only way I was going to find out was by going to him.

"I'm in New York right now, get my location and set it to the nearest airport. Make sure you keep the cops from my route I dont want any problems. Order me a private jet and set it to where ever you are."

" Thank you Elaina."

Humming, then ending the conversation. I recieve the route not even a minute later. Taking care of my family is a full time job that I didnt even sign up for....but without them I would have given up a long time ago. I sighed pulling out of the parking lot finally lightin the blunt.

'This finna be some bullshit.Well at least I get to go to London.'

*Present*

Hearing a truck pull up outside the house. Walking to the door I peek out the bullet proof window to see Abuela's black truck outside. The short mexican lady is cursing my hermanitas the hell out I notice with a small smile. Knowing them they probably deserve it. Shaking my head I start making my way to the door unlocking the door and stepping onto the second brick step.

"THATS YOUR MOTHERFUCKING EXCUSE FOR GETTING ALL THAT SHIT ON MY SEATS!?" oooh car problems...... Walking right back inside grabbing Nena who found her toy bag and was currently sleeping on a stuffed animal. But she was already dressed in her pajamas so imma just count it as a win-win situation. I already did what I needed to do which was open the door.

"Sissy save us!!!!" I hear both my other twin sisters yell. No. You fucked up her truck. You did this to a crazy Mob grandma.

"Let's go find somewhere to sleep Nena." Walking off not listening to the distressing calls of "Sissy!" from all three my sisters now.

I end up picking the empty master bedroom mentally cursing my brother for not having furniture arrive before his family did. 'Pendejo.'

Laying down on the carpet floor while putting white headphones in my ears and using a giant panda stuff animal as a pillow I pull an already asleep Nena over me and, put her head on my chest before closing my eyes.

I stayed like that for hours my insomnia not letting me sleep and my mind never truly letting me rest. I sit, wait, and listen to my sisters and grandma put away the little things they had before going to sleep. Well at least two of them do.

Looking up to my door as I hear the door click open. My younger sister Juju is there with a burning blunt and bottle of Hennessy...... our sleep medicine.

She's wearing a faded purple spaghetti strap crop top and black pajamas shorts. Most of her tattoos being shown off due to the lack of clothes. Pushing a deeply asleep toddler off of me and onto the panda. I watched her wrap her arms around the toy before turning and grabbing my phone.

After making sure my bebé was still fully asleep, something I honestly dont know why I even questioned, I stand up.

Following my younger sister outside to the back yard we hop on the concrete railing facing opposite of each other with the bottle between us and pop it open. Taking out my phone I start to play Say yes by Floetry. Before I really start to look around the back yard. Cerberus was going to have the time of his life fucking shit up back here. He will be arriving tomorrow along with the furniture, he doesn't do well with long road trips at all so we decided to just drug him and put him on a plane along with the rest of the stuff.

"I thought Vin said he would be here?" Her raspy tired voice said drawing me out of my thoughts and making me turn towards her. Big puppy dog hazel eyes that had dark circles from lack of sleep and brown curly hair made her look like a sun goddess. Her light carmel skin basically glowing in the moon and pool light. Out of all of my siblings I connected with sisters the most. Maybe because I went through a lot of bull shit with them? Maybe because they shared the womb at the same time with me? Either way I'm happy for it considering how much the world seems to hates my guts its good to have sisters that actually care if I die or not.

"You know why he can't come here." I said hitting the blunt. Knowingly about to start an unwanted argument.

"Wouldn't you say to protect his girls he would actually be here with us?Not there trying to get himself killed?!"She asked irritated and worried.

"Hm." Taking the bottle she chugs down the liquor with no regrets. Before handing it to me when she is done, I do the same thing until I feel somewhat alright.

"What school are we going to go to? Will you do football?" Now why would I be thinking about doing football? This ain't my home.

"We will be going to sign up for school soon I guess and no I'm not doing football."

" You might be able to start a new life, have friends, find love." She continued. Her mind filled with nothing but romance, roses, and bullets. She already knew that we shouldnt really get attached to anyone out here. It was far to dangerous to get anyone evolved in our lives but right now on this railing she can dream.

"Are you listing out Liyah's to-do list or mine?" I said laughing and fully feeling the effects of the alcohol. Not wanting to be the one to state the facts.

"All of ours fool!" She says laughing. Her smile showing off her small dimples. The smile slowly going away putting her head on my shoulder before shaking it.

"After everything that's been going on we deserve it.........How did we get here hermana?" Sighing I dont answer, knowing that question was more towards the Angels than to me.

"This isn't fair, for him to send us to one place while hes halfway around the world." She continues with a slight whimper in her voice. Taking another sip out of the bottle before passing it and lighting a black and mild.

"He's trying his best." Those soft spoken words could've been yelled at the poor girl with how quickly she quieted down.

Looking over at her down casted head.

"Yeah he is trying his best....but, his best could be with us there to help." She said damn near sobbing. The medicine is working.

"You know why we cant do that Juju. Come on." I said picking her up from the railing and stumbling back into the room after I placed her next to Nena before turning around and locking the door. Poor girl was already asleep when I turned back around.

What could I expect though after everything that's been going on. Quickly checking my phone for the time to see 02:45. I finally lay down next to them and let the alcohol in my system drag me into Morpheus's arms.

[lapeaudelamemoire]

Things I am not putting in your inbox, 27th November 2018

I love you still, and kiss your picture goodnight. Dream good dreams and live well where I am not alongside you.

/

Watched Pickup on South Street (1953) tonight, for all my efforts today at school.

I'm tired of seeing it only as women being trampled like fine roses underfoot, so I'm changing my view of it.

Jean Peters is gorgeous in this film, and maybe she could be read as falling into the arms of a man who happens to just come her way and screws her over, willy-nilly like some sort of hapless flower, but I want to look at it like this now:

I think her character is so strong, just because she decides she's fallen in love with a pickpocket and does what she can for him even if it seems silly and airheaded and troubled naive. Is falling in love at first sight without the guy even knowing her name stupid? Okay, but in her own way she braves things; she takes a beating because she refuses to give his location up because she wants to keep someone else alive; she's got her own morals, she won't give him up on her own principles either. Couched in some anti-communism or not, which, in light of Stalin and the Soviet Union, I can't fault, either way you have it at least she does what she thinks is right by herself and by someone she cares about. Sure it's a woman's lot but for living as a woman in a world not made for her she doesn't scheme, she's not selfish, only the men are. She gets knocked around by this guy and that does suck, but she does conk him on the head herself later. She gets shot for all her trouble, yeah that's just shitty writing but I don't know, maybe I'm resigned to romantic stupidism, but at least she gives a crap. She lives, anyway. I'll pick anyone who does all they can to protect the ones they love anytime. I don't want to be the one tearing down faith or belief in a better someone else. Let it be seen as strong to hope for better and to act in the way one thinks is as it should be, not in the way the world is as unkind and unfair, no retaliation, just holding out hope, to try at all.

The men play at being cynical bastards, macho shooters-up of other people, and maybe the women give up their lives like they don't know any better, but what man would do that so immediately, so open or vulnerable to love, I want to know.

Yeah, we should know better, but let's be honest and understanding - we've rarely been taught to believe in that for ourselves. And if a woman gets hit, is she stupid I don't want to blame her any more than she's suffered, rather, what does that say about the heartlessness, the violence, the mean crudeness and lack of honour of the man, who raised his hand to her?

Maybe it's stupid to give your heart up or away, and yeah we do deserve better, but I'm happy to die a fool if it means I had a little love and hope in my heart and a belief that it meant something; over living with a hardened shrivelled cold grey stone of a heart, who cares for nothing, loves nothing, and only sees oneself.

Maybe I'm just saying that the amount of love and light women give to the world despite the deplorable way we've all been hurt and screwed over and taken for granted and misused and abused is incredible; maybe I want to acknowledge that it's amazing. Maybe it's exhausting and maybe it's insane or makes us stupid childish women who believe in fairytales or fantasies but fuck it, I know more women who want to be tender and soft after everything than men who even give enough of a rat's arse to attempt it. How many caring mothers versus how many distant fathers? How many women determined to give their child a better life even as their husbands disabuse them? How many women strive and endure? Men have this bombastic idea of testing their mettle big ideas of if they were ever tortured they'd never give their brothers up but look at all these women living day to day copping all form of abuse and still being open to kindness. Who, if they shut themselves up, don't take it out on others half as readily as a man spoiling for a bar fight and a bloodied fist or someone else's broken nose.

Maybe I'm wrong. But I just - I don't think we see it as strength enough as we also blame it as weakness. What was wrong with hoping this time it'd be different? Would it have been better if we just shut ourselves off and never gave it a chance again? Would that be worth the living?

Screw being bitter. I wouldn't want to live in a world without women. I don't want a Lord of the Flies. I don't want a fucking Stanford Prison Experiment world. I'll take the hits and the blows and the looking for all the world like a dumb insipid ass idiot if I like someone enough to let them make me smile and grin like the sun itself just touched me without burning me in blistering pain.

I have to. What else could it possibly mean to be alive to the world, and all its possibility? God stretches out his hand. The boat comes your way. Do you refuse? Do you wait for God to scoop you up into the bosom of heaven itself, and how do you answer when he questions you what did you make of my gift to you of a life on this earth? What earthly gifts have you brought back to me? A black heart and an acid tongue?