#i know im already not super active on this blog but. its gonna be awhile before i come back to it

[sfw-mlm-thoughts]

boyfriend broke up with me time to crawl into a dark hole forever ;_;

[asmywhimseytakesme]

Hi, I just saw your blog and I have to ask; do you have any recommendations for people who really, really enjoyed the Murderbot Diaries? Im kinda obsessed with it

Hi @extra-plus-ordinary ! I am so flattered to be asked this because I LOVE giving recommendations.

The first thing I’ll say is, there is a very active Murderbot discord server and if you aren’t in it send me a dm and I’ll get you a link! The lovely folks there can probably give you lots more recommendations than me. I’ll admit I haven’t been on there much lately because life be like that sometimes, but you can bet I’ll be active there plenty when the next Murderbot book comes out in a few months! The folks there also found me links to a couple Murderbot short stories that you should absolutely check out if you haven’t yet.

I have to admit, my first thought on getting this ask is... there isn’t anything else quite like Murderbot! Sometimes all you want is more Murderbot and we don’t have any (yet). The first time I finished the series I started over again at the beginning because all I wanted was More Murderbot Please. It took me awhile to be in the mood for anything else. I absolutely recommend indulging that mood because personally, when all I want is Just This Book, I end up disliking anything else I try to read, even when I normally would like it. But! If you are in the mood to try something a bit different with perhaps some overlapping appeal, let me offer a few suggestions:

The Queens Thief series by Megan Whalen Turner

I have to mention this first because it’s fans of THIS series that got me to read Murderbot. Also I’ve been obsessed with these books since I was a teen. Similarities between the series include:

Sarcastic first person narration—this is mostly just in the first book of the series, The Thief. If you, like me, fell in love with Murderbot because of its voice, give this book a try. Gen is a different narrator in many ways, but I find the appeal similar. There are also some similar character dynamics and interactions with a group gradually getting to know a character they previously underestimated, and forming strong friendships over the course of the series.

However, I will note that The Thief is notably different from the rest of the series in tone and pacing, and some people find it boring. That was not my experience, but many recommend starting the series with the second book.

The second book has a character that I feel is similar to Murderbot on many levels, but I don’t want to say much more about it because SPOILERS. Actually I don’t want to say any more about the series at all because it’s really best to just go in and experience it for yourself. Take my word for it—many people love both series, there is lots of crossover appeal.

The Mandalorian tv series

Ok I feel kinda dumb mentioning this because I feel like everyone’s probably heard of this show by now and has already decided whether they’re gonna watch it. I mean, it’s STAR WARS. So I’ll be brief here, but I really feel like Mando and Murderbot have a LOT in common and would get along really well, and people drawn to one of these characters might also like the other. Murderbot wishes he had as good an excuse as Mando for keeping a helmet on at all times. They’re both similarly good at their jobs (which involve fighting), and end up coming to care for characters weaker and less experienced than themselves. They then put themselves on the line to protect their new Found Family, while steadfastly refusing to admit that they have any feelings whatsoever. Also, so far? No romantic pairings. Murderbot would approve. There are more comparisons I could make but I’ll stop....So yeah, if for some reason you haven’t given The Mandalorian a try.... do it.

Digger by Ursula Vernon

Ok, so the cool thing about this recommendation (aside from the fact that it’s a super amazing story, which I’ll talk more about in a bit) is you can read the WHOLE THING. FOR FREE. RIGHT NOW. Don’t have to put it on hold at the library, don’t have to order it and wait for it to come in the mail, don’t have to track it down in a used bookstore. ITS ALL FREE: http://diggercomic.com/blog/2007/02/01/wombat1-gnorf/

That link should take you to the first page of the comic.

The first comparison I’ll make here is the VOICE. Digger has a first person funny/sarcastic voice that reminds me a LOT a of Murderbot. Different, of course, but..., I think Murderbot would really like Digger. She would be a good client. Practical, tries to stay safe and make good decisions, and she would 100% get Murderbot’s sense of humor. She gets thrown into a crazy magical world and takes it all in stride, making plenty of friends she’s ready to defend with her life.

Yeah, Murderbot would like Digger.

I’d go on, but seriously—did you forget I just said THE WHOLE THING IS FREE TO READ ONLINE so just.... go start reading it and get a taste for it yourself.

http://diggercomic.com/blog/2007/02/01/wombat1-gnorf/

The Vorkosigan Saga

This is a big one that will keep you occupied for awhile! I don’t remember how many books are in the series... 20 maybe? I don’t even know. This is the series I re read when I was coming off my Murderbot high a few months back, because in some ways it has a similar vibe.

Anyway, this is another Space Drama that explores some interesting potential economics, politics, and conflicts of a future of planets linked by wormholes. Some of the planets have a more Corporation Rim feel, others are like Preservation, with many others thrown in the mix. The main character, Miles Vorkosigan... he would love Murderbot. He’d recruit it on the spot—a competent person who shows initiative? Wonderful! On the other hand, Murderbot would HATE Miles.... no sense of self preservation, barreling into problems with no clear plan of how to get out... he would drive Murderbot absolutely crazy.

Personally, I started reading the series with The Warriors Apprentice, and that’s where I recommend starting. However technically Shards of Honor, which tells the story of Miles’ parents and how they met, is the first book chronologically.

The Winter Prince by Elizabeth Wein

This is a very short novel (so if the Murderbot novella length worked for you, give this a try). It’s a gripping take on Arthurian Legend told from the point of view of Medraut (Mordred). Medraut reminds me of Murderbot in many ways—he feels unworthy of love because of what he is, wrestling with a violent past and trying to be better, struggling to know what to do when he is loved by people who he doesn’t think should love him. Also, like All Systems Red, his narrative is addressed to a specific person, which affects how the story is read.

So those are just a few books/series I recommend for Murderbot fans! And everyone, really, because these are all excellent because my taste is impeccable ;-).

I hope there is something here to tide you over til the next Murderbot book comes out @extra-plus-ordinary 😁

[lethbians]

can you explain what's going on right now? i keep seeing big IT blogs talking about some discourse or something but i have no idea what they're talking about other than it involves you lol

alright i like. i truly do not like having diScOurSE out in public because i’m not one to air out my dirty laundry 24/7 but seeing as how it was brought into public against my will i feel like the least i can do is clear up the situation for those who’ve been seeing the posts. 

i’m putting this under the cut bc it’s long. tws for some biphobia, brief mention of transphobia and, at the end, a rape mention. 

so if you don’t know: hi, i’m migz, i’m an it fandom blogger. its okay, i know, its really cool. part of my shtick here is that i like to turn normal thirst tags into works of art for the sake of comedy. perhaps you’ve seen some of my highlights from my “fhg” tag - perhaps your brain has been spared. either way, it became kind of “my thing” around the third or fourth week (mid nov) of me having this blog. at first, i tagged just about every ask i got mentioning the thirst tags with “bill hader” - they had to do with him, so why not tag him? it would draw more like minded people! about two days into that i got a message asking me to tag my nsfw. i am a big dumb idiot, and apologize for not initially doing it. i havent had a following bigger than like 10 in several years and completely spaced on basic etiquette. so by the end of november i was tagging everything applicable  with “notsfw” and “bill hader”. 

now you’re caught up.

on december 1st i got this message from user billhaderanti:

now i want to start by saying i absolutely was in the wrong here. i didn’t even think about how many people were being subjected to the asks i was getting - especially ones who had no idea they were all jokes. i don’t track the bill hader tag, so it just didn’t even occur to me - that’s ignorance on my part, and to anyone who was subjected to the terrors of me before my tagging system: i am genuinely sorry. i relay the same sentiment in my response, though you can tell i’m on edge.

and they replied:

clearly they Were offended by it but thats.. not the point. at this point, im feeling Really weird about the whole interaction, but still understanding, because again - i GET it. i know my posts are gross - that’s the point. it doesn’t make it excusable, though, which is why i understand why people are offended. so i responded with the only solution i Knew would keep us both safe and happy posting on our own blogs. 

so i thought this would be the end of things! i’d been pretty anxious lately already since i’d started to receive anons telling me i was gross and whore-ish for thirst posting in this way (i delete all of those, so if ur thinking about sending one, i guess no one’s stopping you but it won’t be seeing the light of the dashboard). i’m unsure if it was immediately or a few hours later, seeing as how i have a bad concept of time and the post-dates are right on the edge between nov 30 and dec 1, but i went to their blog - because anyone who has been on the internet knows the opportunity to vague post is near irresistible. and...what do ya know

fair! it’s their blog. however i am an emotionally fragile egg girl and immediately got freaked out. the odds that they were the only one who thought this were low. and, again, i’ve been very open on my blog about how important it is to respect boundaries; my posts are absolutely prone to breaking those boundaries people have created for themselves. 

so i made my own, semi-vague post, letting my following know (and i’m pretty sure i’d answered asks about it before, but this is going to be long enough w/o me searching those up too) that i understood if they wanted to block me or unfollow or whatever - people need to create their own safe spaces. the tension is pretty clear in the tags, i’m not trying to hide that. i felt that the way this woman slid into my dm’s was pretty abrasive (just my opinion/how it made me personally feel) and i let myself be a lil emotional about it in the tags of my post.

alright! maybe this is the end. maybe we both go our separate ways and post happily on our own blogs... except it’s not the end. later in the day (some of this was happening like 1/2am, so now its Day day, i believe - again, not good w time passage lol)

clearly, i’m upset. my groupchat double checked that i didn’t get too emotional in my response - did i mention im anxious about discourse lol - and apparently.. it did the trick. she didn’t message me again. great. it was over. 

at this point, i decided i needed to make an even bigger change. so a few days after i’d calmed down i created an entirely new tag for my thirst posts so if people hadn’t already hidden the notsfw posts or just blocked me outright, they’d have a third option to escape the madness. at this point, id had my blog about 6? weeks, but there were still 2k posts for me to sift through - some of them were completely untagged. i also had to do it post by post, because one of xkits features - the mass re-tagger - was getting blogs deleted for some reason, and i wasn’t going to do that. so i spent a few days going through all 2k+ posts, adding the “fhg” tag. 

YEEHAW! a brand new tagging system, no more hopping into the bill hader tag (minus one or two really funny, not super explicit asks, like the bill hader farquaad meme), and, tbf, i’d completely put this woman out of my mind. i don’t seek out drama and do my best to stay in my lane. yesterday, i checked my activity for the first time in awhile since id put out a couple new original posts that had started to get traction and i Love reading tags. i noticed a mutual had @’d me, and realized i havent checked my @’s in...ever, maybe. i see a post from my good pal billhaderanti. 

since i dont follow them and never check my @’s, i’d completely missed it. however, once i did see it, i was horrified. id gone through all that fucking work to keep my blog My Blog and also respect everyone’s boundaries and it still hadn’t been enough. i’d been awake for almost 24 hours and went. a little crazy. and i didn’t reply immediately because i just had no words. i sent it to my friends because i... i just wasn’t going to be able to figure it out myself. 

there’s a lot to unpack in this post alone, but whatever, i’m gonna put my own grievances with the immaturity of 1. making a callout post to begin with when i’d been nothing but civil 2. making a callout post about something as (in the grand scheme of Life) minor as some tags where i refer to a someone’s genitals as a “whack pack” and 3. making a callout post in such a rude way - aside. at the end, she calls me (and whoever else!) a demonic mlw (man loving woman, we assumed, and then later confirmed with a post further back on her blog). 

which - yeah, we started scrolling. at first we were looking for more vague blogs, and then we just...started finding things. billhaderanti is a self proclaimed lesbian separatist, which... fine. but it’s already pretty clear that this woman hates me on some level simply because i am a bi woman (demonic mlw, remember!) which is just. damn man i can’t believe we are still fighting the biphobic fight lol. so the more we scrolled, the more we uncovered - and not just the biphobic / vaguely mtf transphobic things they posted (or put in tags), but we also found that they had their OWN thirst tags. certainly not as hyperbolically comedic as mine, but they were there, talking about his body and his person the same (and, frankly, a bit creepier for other reasons) as mine. 

there’s one post in particular that snatched my wig in it’s creepiness - and i say creepiness in the sense that it feels personal. like this woman feels like she knows bill to some degree where she can say these things. my tags have always had a sense of distance, as they’re written for humor. and maybe this particular post was written for comedic purposes, but it doesn’t read that way, and if it WAS, then she has no right to call ME out for MY comic tags and posts. 

i’ll let it speak for itself, mostly because i don’t want to read it again. 

i also won’t be going through her blog again to find the posts with biphobic and other Interesting:tm: tags because there are plenty and i just really! want to be done with the whole ordeal! her blog is public and i’m sure you can all find it and look to your heart’s content. 

feeling a bit feral and a bit pissed off now that we knew the depth of how rotten this woman’s vibes were, a couple of my pals made a post or two similar to what my tag’s are like except turned up to eleven (if possible) - and tagged them with “bill hader” (and notsfw!!). yes, a bit childish, but at this point, the entire situation was childish, and making jokes was truly the only way we were going to get through it. another vague post went up on her blog soon after.

talking down to us, calling us children, and then for whatever reason calling us virgins... whatever, weird post. around this time most of us (est) went to bed, because it was nearing 3 or 4 in the morning. 

and then today happened. i woke up fresh and ready for the day after a wonderful 4 hours of sleep and found that jane had made an incredibly intelligent post in response to the situation. i won’t ss it, but i’ll LINK in case you missed it. attached there in the reblog is my own response. i think they can speak for themselves. 

after that, things were kind of jumbled, since i wasn’t online a lot and when i was i was Not checking my activity simply because i was afraid of what i’d see. for the most part, it ended up just being support (which i am very grateful to all of you for - it means a lot that you all enjoy my content to any degree). 

there was some more vague posting from both “““““sides”””””” of the “““““argument”””””” - mostly just people restating the fact that this is a public space and we should All be aware of how we effect others. i still hadn’t heard directly from billhaderanti, so i assumed we’d all be dropping and disengaging and moving on. i still wasn’t blocked, though, so who really knew what would happen. 

eventually, it culminated in this last post. tw for mentions of rape

i’m going to start by saying that 

1. there are nearly no teenagers that were involved in this. im turning 23 in january and most of my friends are 20+. maybe one or two are 19. 

2. none of us sent any sexually violent asks - most of us didn’t send asks at all. i believe one or two of my friends admitted to sending asks however they assured me their nature wasn’t bad; as far as i know, everyone remained civil in whatever went on (again, unclear to me as to what was being sent; no one was actively posting or talking about it. if billhaderanti wishes to elaborate, they can, but i don’t have anything to put in). 

3. before i finish this, i would like to apologize to billhaderanti. as a comedian - not just my stupid tags, i mean in real life, too - i know that humor can hurt. it’s not always funny, it’s not just stupid hahas. sometimes things that are supposed to be jokes just hit people differently and cause bad things. i recognize that. i never meant to trigger you (if you’re reading this) or cause you any severe mental/emotional harm. i apologize for my humor bringing up your trauma, and i never meant for that. regardless of my own thoughts and opinions about the nature of my posts/the thirst tags themselves, they hurt you, and i’m sorry. 

anyway, i’m going to wrap this up (i’m bad at endings, what can i say! steven king and i took the same writer’s class!). if you read all this... sorry. i probably won’t be taking any asks about it, because i find the whole “drama” of this to be stupid and rooted in some seriously biphobic issues this fully grown woman has. 

tldr; i attempted to contain my blog so this woman could exist and function safely on her blog, but it wasn’t enough for her, so she called me out, and then some of the fandom called Her out for being biphobic and mean and overall just immature about the situation. as of now, she’s yet to block me, though her and her wife have blocked a few of my friends. her wife continues to clown on my friends. this post was made for clarity’s sake. the end, i’m getting a drink. 

[rxcusant]

HOW I RUN MY BLOG

SPEED

i do my best! generally i just try to keep the pace going but im also a turtle with very bad attention span. like everyone sometimes i have more muse for certain threads and i try to tackle those first. otherwise i?? just try to keep the ball rolling.

REPLIES/DRAFTS

imma be real here chief. I don’t use my drafts. If i put my replies in drafts i will NEVER get them done. so i either Like them or i rely on my memory fkjhgkd  i usually reply in later evening/night hours tho! I’m ATROCIOUS at replying during the day time and its just a lot easier on me in silence with no one around. I try to reply the day after my partner does but sometimes stuff happens and i get to it the next night lmao

STARTERS

I don’t mind doing them and I usually volunteer to! But Im also happy whenever someone else does cAUSE ITS ONE LESS THING FOR ME TO DO L M A o..,,, If theres one thing I noticed Im bad at tho its responding to one-liner starter calls cause i just... spit 2 paragraphs back kjfdghj and they usually end up going no where and it makes me kinda sad. But Im gonna keep liking them cause i wanna interact with people!!!! and those calls always pop up on my dash!!!!!

INBOX

listen here young man my blog is almost 5 years old. This inbox is CLUTTERED....... i try to answer everything as best i can tho!! But, as i will keep saying, I HAVE BAD ATTENTION SPAN and if i forget its not on you!! admittedly sometimes i dont know how to respond so i’ll leave it to stew over but... i end up forgetting anyway. By then i just delete it if its been awhile.

SELECTIVITY

I’m only semi selective tbh I don’t have High Standards or anything djfhkgjf I like an active dash and I like meeting people!! Im coming off a year long hiatus and I still feel like I’ve barely scratched the surface with following people in this community.  If you really wanna know tho I don’t like following if your blog is nothing but ask memes or if youre about is just Off The Wall Crazy that i feel winded after reading it and im not sure i can see us interacting. I’m chill i swear As a side note, I do not follow personals back. 

WISHLIST

[takes out a very long scroll that unwinds and scrolls out the door and keeps going for miles] Well, now that you’ve asked -i want sorikai content..... i want sokai content....... i want soriku content....... i want trinity trio content........ i want the misery that comes with being snorts friend. i live for that. I live for riku and kairi lamenting over trying to save their best friend whos actively avoiding seeing them as much as it pains him cause he doesnt wanna get them hurt hhhhhhh I WANT THEM SNEAKING BEHIND THE SCENES SEEING EACH OTHER CAUSE THE FRIENDSHIP IS TOO STRONG AND THEY LOVE EACH OTHER TOOMUCH TO BE APART AND EVEN XEHANORT CANT DO THAT TO THEM  -I WANT..... ORGANIZATION RPS......... i want!! soranort to interact with all the other vessels!!! there is SO MUCH TO DO HERE!!! Get under his skin, remind him hes gonna beat the light out of precious friends, just!! fuck with him man. Sora will snap back and stick to his guns and make for one big sass fight. Cmon sora was LITERALLY THEIR ENEMY FOR ALL THE GAMES AND NOW HES FORCED TO SIDE WITH THEM theres a lot to do here!!!!!!!!!! And if sora does what he does best and worms into their heart and they become friends?? ALL THE BETTER!!! one of my FAVORITE old relationships on this blog was with saix! it was great!!!!!! im starving out here pls give me organization rps -v...vanitas........ listen i know i rp vanitas too but SOME OF MY FAVORITE RPS ARE WITH OTHER VANITAS BLOGS...... we can work it out man, we can plot it out, i just rEALLY LOVE OTHER VANITAS BLOGS A LOT OK its really fun seeing another vanitas tear down sora that isnt myself. Im just eternally nervous about approaching other vanitas’s in case theyre like NO I DONT WANNA  DO THIS so i sit in silence watching from afar  -DISNEY!!!!! DISNEY!!!!!!! RPS!!!!!!!! DISNEY!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LIVE FOR SORA SEEING HIS OLD DISNEY FRIENDS AGAIN AND THEYRE LIKE “hey what happened” aND HE LAUGHS LIKE “HAHAHAH NOTHING I SWEAR IM FINE HOW ARE YOU THO” OR ALTERNATIVELY DISNEY THAT ISNT IN KH, LET SORA MEET THEM NOW WHEN HES ON ORG MISSIONS ‘go do recon sora and stay in the shadows pls’ ‘okay! [immediately goes and makes 10 friends] -crossover friends!!!! i also live for Sora meeting people who dont know ANYTHING about his bullshit or KH’s bullshit and they steadily overtime see how hes not doing so well until he has to explain OR keep dancing around it because its always better that theyre not involved in all this [this one is hit or miss cause i only follow series im familiar with BUT i can make exceptions jkfhg] -vanitas meeting people similar to him. Before i reset my blogs relationships vanitas aCTUALLY HAD A FRIEND but it was only because they were both tools living with someone elses face and they punched each other to say hello kdjfhgkdj but i like exploring what happens to vanitas when you give him the warmth he spent 4 years feeling from ventus & longing after in the badlands according to the bbs novels. Vanitas is a terrible abomination but goddamn do i love watching him short circuit when someones not treating him like shit. then he gets extremely confused and angry and [chefs kiss] fun. -this is already really long and while i always have more in mind ill stop here

HONEST NOTE you want some honesty????? you want some BRUTAL HONESTY??? I am in a constant state of anxiety people will be disappointed i dont follow the herd with Popular Soranort Headcanons. like they come here expecting one thing only to see thats not what rolls here. Granted I don’t look at or know the Popular Soranort Headcanons because they made my anxiety spike more, im just ??? Its a weird feeling. Im not here to please people because how I choose to write soranort is all up to me and I love him. Its just... a super funky feeling. Theres a reason i took my hiatus but thats all im gonna say.  Im also always worried about my vanitas portrayal since hes just a Lost Soul at the moment with no goal or path or outlet and therefore doesnt really follow his canon self’s personality or behavior.

tagged by: nobody i live in a kingdom of thieves tagging: you! and you! and especially YOU

[nursabrinahassan]

after moooonnthsss...

HELLO TUMBLRINAS!

This gonna be a very super long post! Cus ive not been updating for so many months!

Its been so long. So so so long since last I updated my Tumblr!

Pardon me, I’ve been so busy in life and I couldn’t find a single second to update my blog!

So many things happened for that last few months! Wait.. my last proper update is in the February!

And that’s when Ozil is still 2 months old! But nowwwww….he’s 7 months old already! He’s half of a year now and how I wish I could stop him from growing! Tehee!😝🥰

Many things happened lately. No, I mean for the past few monthszzy….

On the March, while I was busy planning for Mama’s Fabulous 50th Birthday. I felt something wasn’t right with myself. Myself kept telling me to check a Pregancy Kit. It last for 2 weeks I felt that way, I have tried to brushed it off as it is impossible for me to be pregnant again when Ozil is only 3 months old during that time. So after 2 weeks of having that feeling. One night, while Ozil is sleeping and the husband was in the room playing PS4, I decided to take the balance of my pregnancy kit that I still had during Ozil’s time. So I went to the toilet, urined on it, waited and waited and tada! The result is out! It was a clear 2 lines!!

I was so shocked, super shocked to the point I check the packaging whether it’s a expire kit! Haha. But no… I paused for a second in the toilet. I open the toilet door, stand infront of the toilet door for 5 seconds, the husband turned at me and asked why im standing there stonely. With my voice, softly I told him “B, I pregnant lagi…” while showing him the kit from far. His face was shocked, he paused a second and then “Merepek lah b.” He thought I was playing around like how I always do to him haha. But no, this time serious sia! Haha. Dengan cepat, I went up to him, showed him the kit and he smiled…”Alhamdullilah b…” And I was like… “Serious uh?” HAHAHA. So I asked him “B nak check lagi tak? Impossible ni.” So he said yes and I took another 5 more kits to try! haha

After done urined on all the kits, yes all result is the same as the picture above!!! ITS A POSITIVE RESULT!!! Alhamdulillahhhh....

5 kits with 2 clear lines on it! I was shocked again! IT WAS SO UNBELIVEABLE!

I went out the toilet, went to husband and showed him all the kits! He smiled again and continue main game. Serious uh? Gitu je? Then I said… “B I have to go through the labour againnnn….” Hahaha. And that period of time, I couldn’t believe there’s a heartbeat in me! Ya Allah!

So I scheduled to meet my gynae few days after that. Did the scan etc, and was told , my pregnancy was already 2 months old! Another shocking part! So Ozil was 3 months during that time, and my 2nd baby is already 2 months old! Haha. Alhamdullilah, afterall, I’m truly blessed. Right after everything, I still kept this secret from mama! Thought of surprising her during her birthday party, but nope. She gonna be damn shock infront every single one! So I surprised her before her birthday party!

Mama's exact reaction after I told her! She was shocked, in a total shocked!😅 Papa kat sebelah dengan tangan cakap "Alhamdullilahhhhh.." hahaha

This is what i wrapped and gave her for present. Dengan gambar scan terus bagi mama!😅hehe

And then… here comes her birthday party on the 24 March.

Planned was successful! I managed to call everyone in mama’s families to join the fun! Alhamdullilah mama is in so much happiness!

And right after mama’s birthday celebration, Ozil got caught with diarrhea! Diarrhea for 2 weeks straight! It was super super tiring. Changing his diapers every 1 - 2 hours because he been pooping nonstop and it’s a watery poppy! After the 2 weeks straight, he got caught with high fever! And then the husb got caught with high fever. After the high fever, Ozil got caught with Flu & Cough. Non stop I tell you. Ozil been falling sick and sick and sick, and then husband pulak jangkit Ozil, and then my turn, and then back to Ozil. The cycle kept running. Honestly, my maternity leave ends on February and was supposed to start work middle of the March. But i’ve been coming and not coming from March till June! Yes, I just started my working days properly starting this week! Since March I’ve not been coming for the whole week, or either coming to work 2 or 3 days in the week.

I was really tired, and what’s more during Ozil having diarrhea, high fever etcetc, I was on my 1st trimester. And honestly, I wasn’t pay much attention with my pregnancy during that time. I put my full attention to Ozil. Alhamdullilah, everything’s getting better now.

And now.. I’m on my 2nd Trimester and will be ending soon next week. But I still had migraines, muscle cramps.

My 2nd pregnancy was super different to be compared during Ozil’s time.

When I was pregnant with Ozil. I was super super exhausted ONLY during the 1st trimester and that was normal lah eh. Then I entered 2nd trimester, I was super active. Super active that I can still travel from Johor-Singapore-Johor every single weekends when I had to work. I remembered how my husband followed me in the morning took train from Johor to Singapore, then he went home to sleep and then in the afternoon when I finished my work, we will meet up at Woodlands checkpoint and trained back to Johor. Every single weekends we will do that. Sampai dah tahu timing2 nak book train macam mana haha. Also I remember, when the trains is out, we had no choice but to take bus to Johor. The Q was super long and we stand nearly 2-3 hours at the JB custom. I can still happily doing it haha

And then during my last Trimester at 7+months, Alhamdullilah, we received our house key. And then during that period of time, we was super busy. Renovation etcetc. We went up and down for our housing renovation. We went to and fro Jurong-Bukit Batok-Jurong every single day with my yes, 8 months tummy haha. I was still strong to go through it everyday without feeling tired! Imagine how heavy it was carrying the 8-9 months tummy to and fro! Till the day I gave birth!

But my current pregnancy was super different. I’m only at 6 months now and I already felt so so heavy, felt super lazy. Ya Allah, part malas ni jangan cakap uh. Malas semalas malasnyaaaaa… Even my colleague Makcik Siti tegur me “Sabrina… Cik tengok kali ni Sabrina mengandung lain sikit. Cik tengok takde seri langsung. Masa Sabrina mengandung anak 1st, Sabrina selalu datang kerja hari2 pakai eyeshadow. Tapi kali ni, 1 makeup pun takde.” Haha. Seriously, I myself don’t believe im out without makeup! Not even a single face powder! Super bare face to work everyday. Im always out atleast ada eyeliner, but no, not a single eyeliner too! Yes, I assumed it’s the pregnancy homones! Confirm2 pregnancy hormones uh! Mana aku pernah keluar takde celak atau bedak pun! That was so not me eh takde makeup! Hahaha. So yes, this makcik was so so true! She even said “Masa 1st anak, badan Sabrina Nampak kosong. Kali ni punggung Sabrina naik.” Hmmmm…. What else should I say? Even mama told me I was super selekeh this pregnancy haha.

Please bear with me for awhile people! After this pregnancy, I will be back to myself ok! Hahahha

Well.. I was super blessed. Blessed with what Allah has gifted me nonstop. One after another of rezeki I received! But through it all, I know everything that happened ada hikmanya. Truthfully, this wasn’t a plan pregnancy. It was superb unplanned! So so unexpected! But that doesn’t mean unwanted or unloved, It just means Allah knew what I needed before even I did. Alhamdullilah for every single thing.

After I got to know I was pregnant, the first thing first I wanna know is whether it’s a single baby or a twins or triplets! Haha. Because me & my husband born with a family genes of twinny & triplets! So that was the very 1st thing I concern was! Kalau kembar ke triplets, ya allah, another blessing but another thing….pengsan kitaaaa hahaha. But still.. kalau Allah nak beri rezeki, siapa kita nak tolak kan? But alhamdullilah, there’s only 1 in me. AND! THE NEXT THING I WANNA KNOW IS! YES! THE GENDER! Gender is the main thing me, husband and my family wanna know! But still… it doesn’t matter if it was a girl or boy. Truthfully, I don’t mind if it was a boy again, because Ozil ada friend to play with! And if it was a girl, I ada friend to play makeup makeup with! Hahaha. So both is totally fine for me. Also husband is super supportive. Either boy or girl, both he is super fine. Yang penting…. Ive to go through 9 months again ehhhh! Haha.

Alhamdullilah… everything is getting better. Ozil is 7 months old now, and we as his parents already know how to manage in taking care of a baby haha. But still, there’s more for us to learn lah kan. Futhermore, now Ozil is 6 months where foods is starting to play apart. So besides milk, I have to be ready to feed him foods. I’m so excited to explore more in him! Can’t wait to see him walk especially! Haha.

As of now… I’m in the midst of planning for Ozil’s 1st year birthday! Kiasu gile kan! I know! Haha. But I wanna make a big birthday party for him! 5 more months to plan, and I already got sooo many ideas for his birthday! Definitely making a happening birthday party for him! And what’s more we will be having adik with us also during Ozil’s birthday! Hehe. Couldn’t believe Ozil and his adik is 11 months apart haha.

I guess that’s all for now.. Don’t know when will be my next post after this. Haha. Been super busy with life. But as usual, ive been updating my daily life through Ig stories.

But before I end this post…

I wanna congratulate my sissy who just got married last 2 months during Puasa month!

CONGRATULATIONS KAKAK & ABANG RA!❤

I was super happy seeing you finally married!

After all that you have been through over the past years, you definitely deserve this happiness! More and more happiness! Allah listened. So here it is.. He gave you the happiness you have been craving for, wanted for, wishing for and has been prayed for.

“Bercinta selepas bernikah..” That’s what you ever told me it would be beautiful if you ended up that way. And tada! Allah has make you ended up that way! See.. Allah plan is always the best. Always always the best. Cuma kita je yang tak nampak dan tak faham kenapa Allah uji kita. Allah uji kita sekarang, tapi pengakhirannya nanti akan jadi indah. Insya’Allah.

Aku doa semoga kau selalu diberikan kebahgiaan. Insya’Allah.😘🥰

That’s all for today’s post! 🌸