#i know we were polyam and maybe i say this just bc im not rlly polyam
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Ex is officially moved out and it went well but i could still puke
#i let their bf come over to help#which wasnt a mistake but it really sucked to look at this crusty motherfucker and know thats what was deemed more valuable than me#like this guy who is an ex minister ex cop now social worker with a beard that could host rats-#thats who you lost interest in me for?#i feel so betrayed#i know we were polyam and maybe i say this just bc im not rlly polyam#but it still felt like cheating#coming home with hickies but avoid hello pecks by turning their face#coming home less and less and taking their things one bit at a time like i wouldnt notice#refusing to sleep in the same bed as me if they were over and bringing him around when i wasnt home even tho he INTIMIDATED ME#in my own home!!! so he wasnt allowe back!!!! but i they still got brought over and every time#hickies were just everywhere#it felt like they were having an affair i just… knew about it?#idk#im just really heartbroken and feel rlly worthless#but thats how theyve made me feel for a rlly long time which is why I finally ended it#im just still so sad
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