#i literally went into this going as long as dee doesn’t win i’m happy

[blackrosesfanfic]

Chapter 168

Next Day

Trey

I haven't talked to my wife since I got off of the plane late last night. I feel guilty because I slept like a fucking rock in that quiet hotel room away from home. It did feel good. No Lane in the middle of the night. No baby monitor going off 3, 4 times a night. Just silence. I even kicked Chris out of my room. But now I'm anxious to get home. Ready to hear what Lane has to say. Ready to hear Cammie complain about me not helping with Caden or annoying her while she has Caden. Ready to be Tremaine.

"Empty house." I say walking in.

"And you mad?" Chris says pushing pass me.

I am truly disappointed. I get on the phone calling April. She doesn't answer me. I go to Lane's room. It's clean. Not normal. I step in Caden's room. He is breathing fast as usual, half naked in a hot room. I sigh in the hall then go into the bedroom. Cammie is sleep. I hear voices in the hall. I go be nosey.

"You come here causing shit." MiMi snaps. "It was quiet. Go."

"Why you always here?" Chris asks fighting with her. "Where is your husband? Do you live here?"

MiMi slaps him upside his head winning. "Get out my face."

"Can I just get the baby?" Chris asks backing up.

"She is sleep. Leave her alone."

"Come back in how long? I know you know." Chris says annoyingly.

MiMi rolls her eyes. "Thirty minutes."

Chris walks away. "Cool. Enough time to shower."

"Where Lane?"

"Virginia."

I sigh. "Oh yeah."

"Don't seem so damn sad." MiMi says walking into her room.

"Cammie." I say walking back to the bedroom. "Jayla."

She has a fluffy as hot looking blanket on her. I take it off revealing an ass naked body. I take my shirt off going to the bedroom door. Out of habit I look out of it for Lane. I usually do to make sure he don't feel like I am locking him out. He tells April that we lock him out of the room for no reason. Bad ass. I get on the bed on top of Cammie.

"Jayla?"

"Tremaine?" she says smiling.

I kiss her trying to wake her up completely. "Wake up, Jayla."

"No. The baby is going to be up after while and he isn't sleeping at night. Just crying."

"I'll get him."

She tries to go back to sleep. "No, Tremaine."

"Jayla, seriously, I'll get him."

"All night?" she says looking at my eyes.

"All night." I say grinding against her.

She gives me a look. "Tremaine, I mean all night. He literally does nothing but cry for an hour. No needs for nothing. He takes short 5 minute naps."

"I'm a entertainer. I got this."

"How was your trip?"

I kiss her lips. "Good."

"How many groupies you had last night?"

"4." I reply.

She giggles. "What do you want me up for?"

I look down at her body. "Must I really waste my time explaining this to you?"

"Tremaine, you are going to be up alone with Caden by yourself?

"I think you said that."

"Alone?"

"Yes, Jayla."

She presses her ass up against me. "What did you say you wanted with me?"

"Just be quiet."

"Do we not do 4 play anymore?"

"Since Lane? No."

She moves her ass. "Lane is in Virginia. He was so excited about going to see Grandma Rose. He told the house lady to clean his room for him and he would give her some candy."

"Damn, that's the payment?"

"She didn't get that. He left."

I kiss Cammie. "What's your order for play?"

"None. I was bullshitting." she giggles.

“Good.” I say checking her pussy then gliding my dick to it.

Why bother checking hr pussy? I know it’s ready when I want it. My Jayla. I whisper a song in her ear that I have been thinking about lately. She hums the song back through her moans. This is a song I will never be able to perform. I may record it but never release it. Our little song. Called Jayla.

  Cammie

I rollover in the bed expecting Trey to be there. I sigh. I love when I wake up and he is right there. All I'm waiting up to now is sore breast and a wet bra. I change then head to Caden's room. I hear low whispers coming from Caden's room. At first I thought it was Trey on the phone but as I got closer I could tell it was two separate voices. I peek into the room. Trey and Chris are on the floor with cream soda and pizza. I push the door open. Trey had Caden on his leg as they sat there talking.

"Is this how entertainers babysit?"

"The boobies." Chris says. "He is waiting for you."

Trey picks Caden up holding him into the sky. "Is your body on a timer?"

"It's going on 4 am. How did you keep him quiet all this time without feeding him?"

"Formula and that breast milk in the pouch." Trey says.

I take Caden. "Did you run out?"

"No." Trey says standing up. "He is tried of my rough hands and flat chest. He keeps trying to rub his cheek against my arm."

"He was everything but quiet." Chris says.

I get all warm and teary eyed. "Awh, I'm proud of up. You really did it."

"Thank you." Chris says.

"I told you." Trey says kissing me.

Caden was more than happy to take my nipple. He knows that these things are full. I glance up from my zone. I had totally forgot that Chris was in here and just proceeded with breastfeeding as normal. He was eating pizza and not worried about me. I cover Caden's head anyway out of respect for the cause. Trey wasn't paying attention either. I smile at him. I can't believe he did it. Chris isn't a big help with a newborn baby so together it would still be a hard task. Especially the irreluctant crying.

"Jayla." Trey whispers.

"What?" I say opening my eyes.

Trey leans into my face. "Who being put to sleep?"

I chuckle. Caden had let go of my nipple and was looking up into the ceiling. We have these star like twinkling lights on his ceiling. He stares at it a lot at night. When I move he starts crying. Trey takes him from me then silence him immediately. I see that I'm not needed here. Chris walks into the room with MiMi's baby.

"Is this some sort of Daddy Daycare?" I ask checking my clothes.

"People rather fuck than take care of their baby." Chris says.

"You asked for the baby, nigga." Trey laughs.

Chris smiles. "She smiles at me."

"That's because she don't know how to look at motherfuckers and read them. I'm going to teach her to hate bitches like you."

"Are those words you want to teach your baby?" Chris says in a high voice.

Trey comes over to me. "Watch this."

He holds Caden up to the ceiling for a few seconds then take him down. Caden starts crying. Does he want to be close to the lights? Trey puts him back in the air. Caden's cheeks rise as if he were smiling. I couldn't see his entire face.

"If he starts crying it's because you are shaking him and he can't focus on the lights. Minnie doesn't care for lights. All she wants is to be rocked and cuddled close to your face."

"I think the two of you got this under control."

"If my nipples produced milk then I wouldn't need you." Chris says.

I laugh. "If your nipples had milk and you had a uterus then you really wouldn't need anyone. impregnate yourself."

Chris laughs. "I always wanted to give birth."

"Yeah, okay." I say walking out. "I'm knocking."

"Say that as you open the door." MiMi says.

I run and jump on the bed. "I thought your husband was in here. Christmas said that y'all were fucking."

MiMi chuckles. "Chris bullshitting. That bitch got an attitude for some reason. We ain't doing nothing. Chris needs to have him a baby and give me mine."

"I love you." I tell her.

"Bitch, bye." She laughs pushing me.

I sigh. "You all fucked up if you complaining about somebody having your baby for you."

"He doesn't keep her because she is whiny and greedy as hell. I straight breastfeed. No formula so no long sleeping periods."

"Oh please. You talking about somebody else's baby. Not Caden. I'm so happy. I love my baby. Caden."

"When are you putting him out there? You doing that celebrity thing and hiding him?"

I sigh. "I know Trey wants to show him off. Trey likes to show off. If I wasn't such a selfish stuck up bitch..."

"Mmh." Dee says from the bathroom.

"Shut the fuck up." I spat. "Anyway... I'm making it hard to decide. We were waiting for after the show so now..."

MiMi pushes me. "So you going to have that conversation?"

I roll off the bed. "I guess I am."

"I love you too." MiMi says.

"You forty years later."

"I knew your ass was old."

I close the door then look for Trey. Caden is in his bed sleep but no Trey. I check to make sure Caden's clothes aren't too tight on his rapidly growing thighs. I think he is going to be chubby in a few weeks. I kiss him then go into the bedroom. I wasn't looking for Trey but I found him in here.

"Look at this." he says showing me his phone.

"I see. Tremaine..."

He sucks his teeth. "You didn't look at it. I watched your eyes."

I snatch the phone. "Damn, is it that serious?"

"You no fun. Give me my phone."

"Here." I say tossing it. "Anyway."

"Naw, I don't want to talk."

I don't know if he serious or not. If so he went from sugar to shit. And if so he getting ignored so it really don't fucking matter.

"We should put Caden pictures up. Or maybe a video."

"I'm good."

I roll my eyes. "Be fake then."

He wraps his arms around. "Sexy, I tried to be mad at you."

"Find a real reason. You hurt my feelings."

"You not a soft ass... Well you are but you not that soft."

I let him feel on me then I walk away. Caden starts crying after he grabs me again. I chuckle then lie down on the bed. Trey walks out without asking if I was going. I like whoever this man is tonight. The other night he complained about everything. Now he doing it all.

"Bitch!"

"Hey, Bae." I smile.

Amber comes and lies down. "Did you miss me all day?"

"Yes."

"Liar."

I watch Trey and Caden on the monitor. Trey was singing to him as he tries to calm him down. I'll wait a few minutes then go see if he is hungry. The worst thing about breastfeeding is that you will never know if your baby got the right amount out of it.

"You start looking at them and forget all about me right here in the room."

"I'm sorry." I say giving her the monitor.

She smiles at them. "That doesn't excuse you."

[jayankles]

Spread the Love - My Forever Favourite Fics

Remember when I said that I asked y’all to send in your favourite fics of your own or someone elses? 

Your Favourites

Well I think It was high time to tell you mine. I had been planning on doing this a long time ago but I hadn’t gotten around to doing it but now here I am posting this showing all my love to the most memorable stories  have read since I joined this site. So without further a do, below are at least 60 stories that I have loved and thoroughly enjoyed. All have a comment about what I liked about it and if you’re lucky you may be on there twice.

BTW it’s a very long post.

Drabbles

Familiar - @torn-and-frayed  I think about this all the time and have probably read this drabble at least three times. I would have loved for it to be turned into a full on oneshot to get the backstory of Dean and the Reader because the angst is just so enticing you can’t help but want to read more.

Oneshots

The Little Princess - @iwantthedean  Jensen has awesome ways to make it up to his daughter. And a sassy one at that too! Love me some daddy!Jensen.

Even Though - @imagineteamfreewill I don’t read a lot of Sam but I couldn’t help but giddly grin at domestic!sam.

Marry Me - @ravengirl94 *slaps hand down on table* this was the cutest shit I have ever read. It was just so fluffy I could help but read it a second and third time.

Downsized - @deanssweetheart23  I love me some toddler!Dean and I think you captured him perfectly, especially his saucy little grabby hands ;)

Always - @winchestersnco  This monster of a oneshot stands at 20k and it was worth the read. From what I can remember, it shows the journey of the relationship between Dean and the reader, following the seasons from one to twelve.

The Asshole Jock - @thegreatficmaster Nini, your fics just make me smile because your personality shines through and makes them so relatable. I love that you made this a gender neutral so every one could enjoy, definitely made me love you and Dean even more.

Sweet Relief - @winchestersnco  Everyone needs some Nurse!Sam in their life so here you go. It is 10k worth of pure and utter greatness.

Wanted - @jotink78 This cute little oneshot explores Dean and the readers daughter’s feeling about not being planned.

Lost and Found - @little-red-83  This is an angsty Gadreel story that I hope someday gets a sequel or second part because there isn’t enough Gadreel love out there, not that I am aware of anyway, but this story is based on the angels falling in season 9 and it hurts my heart so much because the reader went through changes that she didn’t think could happen.

Eyes Like That - @little-red-83 The may be my absolute favourite Gadreel oneshot ever, it shows a different side of the reader that we are all used to reading or writing. It’s filled with angst and I should be called a monster for loving it but I can’t help it It was written so perfectly that I feel sorry for Gadreel.

The Ladybug and the Cowboy - @avasmommy224 This oneshot has Dean Smith in it and has a plus size!reader. For me, that was a win-win and only fueled my love for Dean Smith.

Trials of Silence - @moonlitskinwalker I read this twice. The second time I read it was better than the first. It was just so well written about the struggle the reader went through after losing her hearing and I was glad that someone reblogged it so I could give it the recognition it deserved.

People Can Change - @kas-not-cas I related so much to this AU story because I’m that chubby nerd that is full of self doubt so I fell in love with it and read it a couple of times through tears of how incredible this whole thing was.

A Darker Shade of Love - @roxy-davenport his was just so hot. It’s a little canon divergent but that is what makes this oneshot so great. It included the struggle that MOC!Dean goes through and the transformation into Demon!Dean what makes it so great.

Hold the Line - @lipstickandwhiskey  At first I was intimidated by the word count but sucked it up and read the shit out of it and thank god I did because it was a fantastic read, I loved the build up of the relationship between Dean and the reader.

The Wish Spell - @emilywritesaboutdean I think this fic was the first that I had read from you and I automatically hit that follow button as soon as I read it. I’m glad someone reblogged it and it came on my dash, so I had the opportunity to read it and follow such a nice person.

Don’t Speak - @demondeanismybaby This oneshot hurt in the beginning because it was so relatable but Dean being the adorable fluff ball that he is saves the day again.

Those Eyes [Part 1] [Part 2]  - @demondeanismybaby The first part gave me mixed emotions; the fact that they got along so well in the beginning then it turned out to be lies. The the end of that, I almost burst into tears with how sucky Dean was. Then that second part, it was just rude I thought that Ashley would make it better but no, she made it worse and didn’t care for my fragile little heart. Thanks for that.

Where Is My Mind - @magicalthoughtsendinterriblefics This was a head fuck from the beginning and it messed me up but I loved it from start to finish.

The Kiss - @iwantthedean What can I say about this? Well, apart from the fact that I have read it about three times already, it was amazingly written with any dialogue yet you have conveyed all the words through the loophole. I adore this oneshot because it gave me my love for Dean Smith.

The Smiths - @kayteonline  I recently found your blog and this fic and I turned into a Dean Smith slut even more. I hope there’s more eventually.

Huddled - @kittenofdoomage  A/B/O wasn’t really my thing until I read this oneshot. I also admire the fact that was reader was a strong character in this and helped Dean out.

The Price You Pay - @kittenofdoomage  My heart was torn out of my chest, multiple times and put back together. The sacrifice that both Dean and the Reader made was perfect and the ending was amazing.

Cross My Heart - @deanssweetheart23 Honestly, I read this oneshot and I was all over the place. I was happy, excited, then it got to a certain part in there and my heart dropped. I was in tears before I had even finished it. But thank god I did. Because I absolutely loved it.

Dee - @percywinchester27  This cute oneshot make my heart melt. I absolutely loved the transitions in it, I adored how Dean automatically went into protector mode. And that beautiful ending just made me love you even more, Ana.

Series

Fantasy vs Reality - @avasmommy224 This Dean AU series where Dean has tattoos just melts my heart. There’s angst, fluff and it is absolutely to die for.

Unexpectedly - @winchesterenthusiast  This is another Dean AU that I love. I mean Dean is adorable and FLEETWOOD MAC! I love them! It’s so perfectly written that I can’t get it out of my head. And just so you know, Kait is also an amazing person so there’s that too.

Private Lives - @katnharper This Jensen series is fantastic, it just reels you in from the start. Each chapter just gets better and better, the deeper you delve and I can’t wait for the next part of it.

https://iwantthedean.tumblr.com/post/146472156396/angeles-master-list Nicole, this series is everything. I loved that it was based on the song Jensen covered. I loved the imagery it created and soon I will have to read it again!

Forward - @blacktithe7 This series is just ripping me apart. It explores real life struggles and it’s not just fluff that doesn’t happen all the time. It is absolutely beautiful, each and every word of it. I also love the battle between Jensen and the Reader but my little Jaybird is too cute to harm and what do you do? Hurt her! I shouldn’t have trusted you.

I Know Your Wife (She Wouldn’t Mind) - @teamfreewill-imagine This Jared, Gen, Reader series just pulls me to the Jared side but the fact that Ditto has Jensen and Danneel as adoptive parents and JJ the coolest little sister. So cute with the right amount of angst and smut.

A Little Thing Called Love - @chaos-and-the-calm67 This Jensen series has been put on hold but I remember when it first came out that it played with my emotions because one minute I loved Jensen then the other I just wanted to hurt him but then again I understood why he did what he did. I can’t wait for the next part whenever that may be.

Series Masterlist - @thing-you-do-with-that-thing So I love way too many fics from Kari so I had to link her series master list. Find the following fics because you will not be disappointed: (DEAN) When You Least Expect It, Strawberry Wine, Kill Zone, Ties That Bind, (SAM) The Blue Beach House, (JENSEN) Living With Regrets. These are literally only a few that I love each series that I read just got better and better as you read the next chapter of each story.

Girls Night - @itswitchcraft-not-googlemaps  I think this series is what made me follow you. I read it and automatically hit that like, reblog and follow button. I’d love to have a friend like Jody and you wrote her so well.

Invisible - @just-another-busy-fangirl This is another amazing series, at times it was frustrating when I couldn’t figure out how the Reader would be seen again! But in the end, love conquers all.

They’re Watching - @daydreamingintheimpala This mystery series fucked me up, it was so good and had me on the edge of my seat as I read each chapter. Also, check out The Donor because it gives you all kinds of Daddy!Dean feels.

Beauty and the Beast  - @imagineteamfreewill This series is one of my absolute favourites. It’s all I can think about, and it just makes me want to watch the original and the new movie all the time as I wait for a new part to come out.

Close Every Door - @jotink78  It started with a shopping trip for a supply run and there are warnings that you have to read because it gets a little dark but Joanie tells an amazing story that captures your attention from start to finish.

The Chaos Theory - @frickfracklesackles  Serial Killer!Sam warning. It’s only the beginning but damn is it a good start to an even better story. Also check out Gasoline (Jensen Series)

Lilies and Zeppelin - @deanscolette This Punk!Dean AU took me on a roller coaster of emotions. It hurt but it was also full of love and hate.

Masterlist -> 62 Minutes - @dean-the-smol-bean Luna has put out a one of the best series I’ve read, she’s so talented and manages the slow burn and the love story between Dean and the reader. Unfortunaly there isn’t a separate masterlist so it leads to the full one – look for 62 Minutes and you will not regret it.

Fresh Start - @like-a-bag-of-potatoes This is an AU series to die for. It shows the story of the reader and Dean before they got together and it is brillant story that has been told.

I See Fire - @plaidstiel-wormstache I read this and instantly fell in love with it. I was pulled and drawn in with the reader and her secret and her special powers. It’s what made me follow you, it was so memorable.

Stroke of Luck - @percywinchester27 This series annoys me because it is so good but on the other hand the SLOW burn makes me want to just get them and smash their bloody heads together. We get the insight of Dean and the Reader’s upbringing together and the significance of the best OFC I have ever had the pleasure of reading.

Balconies - @lipstickandwhiskey This series was a great read, the seriousness of real life situations and the overall greatness of it all just makes me love it again and again everytime I read it.

Dirty Girl - @sis-tafics It’s Demon!Dean that should be enough but I just can’t leave at that because that wouldn’t be fair because the SMUT is just hot af especially with a Virgin!Reader at the beginning.

Our Little Secret - @sis-tafics this ongoing series is great one to read if you are a kinky son of a bitch but underlying all that smut is a plot that will make you love Dean, flaws and all, even more than usual.

The Good Parent - @faith-in-dean  I’m kinda upset that Franzi lost interest in this story because I was loving this rewrite, and Dad!Dean so...

Series Masterlist - @luci-in-trenchcoats  Michelle is just an amazing writer overall, I was struggling to choose only a few of them, but my favourites are; Simple Man, The Firefighter, Frat Boy, Locked In, Spend the Night and Worlds Best Dad. ← and this is just Dean. The reader is just so fantastically written. Dean is a loving and an adorable dork, who wouldn’t want that?

Wayward Daughters - @chelsea072498  I was enamored with this story from the get go. The detail of this story was just so amazing that most of the time, it’s all I can think about. The story of Dean, the reader and Alex is just so entralling that you can’t help but fall in love with it.

Celebrate Me Home - @callmesweetheartifyoumeanit IT’S 75K WORTH OF PURE AND UTTER HARD WORK. Every new chapter that Moz had put out I absolutely loved. She had captured so many different, conflicting emotions. I cried. A lot. Like a baby. But each part got better and better. The deeper you dove into the story the better you learned the characters and how they think and how they feel. And as you read it, it hits you right in the feels, like all the time. I will definitely be reading this over in the near future.

A Perfect Storm - @nichelle-my-belle This series is what made me follow Nichelle. I just loved the twists and turns at every angle. When you threw in the twist about the reader’s father and who she truly was, that freaking got me. Amazing writing.

Mr and Mrs Smith - @purgatoan I love that in the dean x reader series that both of them are hunters and have to hide it from each other and the little detail that the reader has the tattoo first and then Dean gets it and not the other way around

Where It All Began - @supernatural-jackles I have got to tell you. I fell in love with this series as soon as I laid eyes on it. I had saved it in my drafts and did nothing but read it for a week until I had caught up. Then I just sat there waiting for the next update from Jen.

Masterlist - @supernatural-jackles I also put Jen’s masterlist her because I also loved her ‘Meet My Daughter’ series and ‘Hell on Earth’ series, too, but honestly, you should just go and check it out anyway because she has written some of the most amazing fics that I have read in my life. I mean I try not to fangirl but it’s so hard.

Sexy Mutt - @larajadeschmidt13 I’m not really an OFC reader but I love this Dog!Dean x OFC. Dean, in this, is an aborable little pupper who has no clue how he ended up in a human body.

Stay - @larajadeschmidt13 This fic is another Dean x OFC but this time Dean is a professor! You wouldn’t want to miss that opportunity.

Fire and Ice - @huntingandwritingthings I think that this was the first fic that I had read from your blog, I loved that it showed real life struggles and you brought in an aspect from your own life; the reader being french, it was such a great read.

Undeniable Heat - @katymacsupernatural  I am loving this series so far, it has so many twists and turns as you read each chapter and makes you fall in love with Jensen even more.

Daddy’s Little Lovebug - @torn-and-frayed I love this series it had inspired me to write my own series of Daddy!Dean. Little JoJo make your heart melt from the beginning and just gah it’s too cute. Also check out Send the Pain Below, Fragments and With All My Heart

[fundeadasylum]

All the Silverware and Dishes are Poisoned

I am literally the worst for writing this.

Teslaverse. Definitely not canon. Alternate ending for the Severance Contingency thread. This is not a happy one shot.

Warning for suggestions of violence, gut spills, guilt trips, vivisections, and a slow spiral into madness.

EDIT: I wrote this five hundred years ago and I still hate myself for it. And for some reason you psychos wanted to see it, so here it is.

———

He tried keeping track of the days and he managed it for almost a month.

Then they did something and he lost heaven only knows how much time and after that he gave up and just let the hours pass.

They were much more careful with him this time. Maybe careful wasn’t the right word. They certainly didn’t treat him nicely but they didn’t treat him as a child either. He was an object to be contained and studied again. The thought chilled him to the core and made him feel sick.

When he ran screaming at the door, pounding and scratching at it, calling for his friends, they shackled him to the wall.

He had no idea where Simon was.

His mind unhelpfully provided him scenarios about just what they were probably doing to Simon.

He threw up against the wall until there was nothing left in his stomach and then dry heaved until he thought he’d choke to death.

****

He fought back when they came for him. He scratched and bit and hit and kicked anything he could reach. Then they tasered him and he woke up sore and teary-eyed strapped to a chair in that horrible, bright orange straight jacket.

They had to wait for him to calm down before they could get a word out of him.

“It was Agent Kass! He said—“

“We know what happened.” They interrupted him a lot, talked down to him. Dib didn’t think it was just because he was a kid, “What we want to know is where the scip you and your…associate stole is.”

They wanted Zim. Of course they did. Dib felt a flare of protective jealousy—Zim was his project—before he settled for glaring at them. Panic clawed at his chest and he couldn’t stop the quivers shaking his frame. There was no way to get out of this, not now. They’d be watching him too closely.

When they put him back in his cell, chained to the wall by his ankles and a length of steel cable, he shouted a swear word at the closed door.

Kass would have been proud.

****

“Pathetic.”

Dib jolted and stared around the room, eyes wide, chest heaving.

He could have sworn—

But no, that was silly.

He put his head back in his knees and closed his eyes again.

He tried to remember how to breathe.

****

The room looked smaller. He knew, rationally, that it was not. But it felt like every time he sucked in a breath, the walls moved in a little closer.

Dib held his breath to see if it would stop the walls from shrinking in on him. It didn’t work mostly because he couldn’t hold his breath from that long. He decided to stop looking at the walls and went back to trying to worm a finger under the cuff on his ankle. There was an itch under there that was driving him crazy.

“Oh yeah, I’m sure it’s only that driving you crazy. Just an itch you can’t scratch.”

Dib looked wildly around the room, panic making him shudder.

He’d heard it that time, he knew he had.

He knew that voice.

“I’m a little hurt, kid. I thought you’d be happier to hear from me. I mean, at least I’m someone to talk to, right?”

“No,” Dib blurted, eyes wide, still looking around for the source of the voice. A source he knew, he just knew, he wouldn’t find, “Because you’re not—you can’t be—you—we l-left you—“

“Left me out in the Void.” Future Dib’s voice finished for him. It was a sneer, a curl of disgust and hatred that made Dib flinch,

“I really should find a way to thank you for that.”

“N-no, no! You’re not really here! This is—this is some kind of trick!” Dib shouted at the ceiling, at the locked cell door, standing on a shaky soap box to try and convince himself, “Y-you guys think I’m gonna f-fall for your—your mind games!? Or whe-whatever! Not happening! Let me out of here! Let me go! LET ME OUT!”

“That’s funny,” Other Dib’s voice chuckled coldly from nowhere and everywhere at once,

“I said the same thing.”

****

“Where’s Simon?”

“—about where you’ve been these last few—“

“Where. Is. Simon.”

“—really don’t think you’re in any kind of position to be—“

“Where’s Simon!?”

“—if you don’t calm down, we’ll—“

“WHERE’S SIMON!? WHAT’VE YOU DONE WITH HIM!?”

“—containment breach! Just—“

“IF YOU’VE HURT HIM I’LL KEH—I’LL KILL YOU! WHERE IS HE!? WHERE’S SIMON!?”

“—someone get this kid under control—“

“—holy shit! He’s—“

“WHERE IS HE!? WHERE IS HE WHERE IS HE WHERE IS HE WHEREISHEWHEREIS—“

****

The new cell was smaller but the ceiling was higher. The walls were padded and there were cameras high up in every corner of the room. Dib tried to reach them but he kept falling and eventually decided it wasn’t worth the bruised tailbone.

He was no longer allowed out of the cell without a straight jacket.

It had been oddly satisfying to bite that agent hard enough to break skin.

“This is just rich.”

Dib flinched and backed up against the wall, gaze darting around the room. The tracking bracelet on his ankle rubbed his already raw skin. That had been added after the fifth escape attempt. Well, they called it an escape attempt, Dib called it trying to find Simon and get the fuck out of this place.

“Look at you, you’re a mess. See what happens when you don’t follow your destiny, kid? You should have listened to me. You should have become me.”

And there he was, lounging against the locked cell door as if this were a palace. That winning smile was a twisted sneer of victory, his arms crossed across his chest, head cocked at an angle that spoke of observation and scorn. The harsh lights of the room caught the blue of his goggles and splintered it.

Dib make a dry squawking sound and flatted himself against the wall. He wished he could sink through it.

The Other Dib, the one from that hoorible future, the one they’d left trapped in the Void, pushed himself off the door with his shoulder and walked slowly across the room. He owned the space he moved across, exuding an air of confidence that was nearly tangible. Dib wanted to be sick but all he could do was slide to the floor to try and keep as far away from his alternate future self as possible.

“Yh-you’re not real.” He said, trying to sound firm, trying to believe himself. Other Dib’s sneer widened, “You’re not real! They’re s-still trying to get information out of me! This is a trick! Where’s Simon you slimy bastards!”

Other Dib let out a low whistle, stopping a few feet from Dib, “Wow, what a potty mouth you’ve become. Picked that up from Agent Kass, did you? Hey, what happened to him anyway? He was tied up with you in that van, right? Do you think he’s dead? I bet he’s dead.”

Dib pressed his hands over his ears and squeezed his eyes shut. He would not give in to their taunting. He was stronger than this! He would get out of here! He had to! He had to find Simon! He’d find Simon and they’d get out and they’d go back to 1 Tesla Drive and back to Dee and back to Mab and back to home cooked meals and Zim screaming at him. Back to adventures through fizzling portals and shady pasts, back to too many cans of Black Plasma and a fridge that stole eggs, back to ghost hunting shows hosted by idiots with fake equipment, inventions that half worked, the smell of sulphur and burnt wood.

Back home.

“I wanna go home…” Dib whimpered into his knees as he curled up, trying to shield himself from the Other Dib’s onslaught of verbal abuse, “I want to go home…”

****

Light in his eyes.

He squinted and half turned his head away.

Hands on him.

“Suh…”

“SCP-7772 is awake.”

“Sih…”

Something cold in his mouth. He spat it out instinctively. It was forcefully jammed back in and he realized dazedly it was a thermometer.

Why was it so hard to think straight?

“Temperature: normal. Heart rate: slower than normal but that might be the sedatives.”

“Si…”

Metal? Metal. Metal! There was metal!

He jerked. It held fast. A strangled sob shook his voice as he tried to speak,

“Si…mon…”

“Fuckin’ nutcase. Keeps crying.”

“It is a kid.”

“From another dimension, yeah.”

“Still human.”

“Apparently.”

“Simon…!” His voice was hoarse, shaking. Was he crying? What was happening? He felt sick, “Simon! Where’s S-Simon!?”

“Not this again…”

“Shit, kid’s like a broken record. First that Keter and then that humanoid with the weird heart.”

“Think it actually cares?”

“Simon! Simon! Where are you!? Sh-S—h-help! Somewh-one! Simon!”

“Someone shut it up before it gets hysterical.”

Ice. Thin. In his arm. Metal. Heard to breathe. Hard to think straight.

“Pathetic, really. Could have been something. Now look at you.”

“We should just put it out of it’s misery…”

“You almost sound like you give a shit.”

“Hey, bro, why’re you given up so easily?”

…Simon?

****

He tried keeping track of the days.

He tried making plans to escape.

Nothing stuck.

They started leaving the straight jacket on.

It was driving him crazy.

“Oh, is that really the only thing that’s driving you crazy?”

“Why didn’t you ever come find me?”

Other Dib was a regular. Dib had given up trying to get them to stop tormenting him with whatever they were putting in his cell to make him see these things.

Sometimes there was someone else.

Dib refused to look at them.

They had a gaping chest cavity and jagged cuts and there was something important missing from their dripping mass of internal organs.

He’d looked once.

They’d had to sedate him for a while.

“Hey Dib, when you get out do you think we could make a detour to look for my heart? I think they’re keeping it in a jar somewhere.”

He dry heaved on a painfully empty stomach and tried to remember how to breathe.

****

“I wonder if Dee’s okay…”

“She’s probably dead.”

“….nuh-uh. Mab woulda taken care of her when I never came back. Zim’s probably okay too.”

“Just keep telling yourself that.”

****

“I’m sorry, Simon…”

“That sure amounts to a lot, doesn’t it.”

“Who the hell are you talking to?”

****

“SCP-7772 is mentally degrading at an alarming rate.”

“You want to do something about that?”

Dib kicked his foot off the edge of the exam table so his tracking bracelet banged against the metal edge, glaring at the two men in the room with him. They were all talking about him like he wasn’t there, ignoring him, treating him like something inhuman and not worthy of their attention.

He could see Other Dib in the corner, leaning against the wall and sneering at the room as a whole.

“We’re supposed to keep going until we find out where SCP-7771A and B are.”

“Think it even knows what we’re talking about anymore…?”

“I’m right here, you know.” Dib spat, banging the tracking bracelet on the edge of the table again. It sent a jarring sensation through his leg to his bone, “You could just talk to me.”

They shared a significant look that made Dib’s mouth taste sour. In the corner of his eye, he saw a flicker of dripping red and a hole where a heart was supposed to be. He swallowed the churning in his stomach.

“All right, 7772. Where did you hide the Keter?”

Dib rolled his eyes, “Not tellin’. Besides, he’s probably not even there anymore so even if I did tell you, it’d be pointless.” He sagged back against the exam table, squirming in the straight jacket, “Why don’t you just ask Agent Kass, I bet he’d be more than happy to spill his guts.”

One of them laughed,

“He already did. They’re all over one of the basement containment cells. Amazing how much honey was inside him…”

Dib nearly fell off the exam table as he tried not to be sick. The men started laughing. Other Dib was laughing too.

It sounded like Simon might have been crying.

****

“I’m never getting out of here, am I?”

“Probably not.”

“Maybe if you tried a little harder, you could have saved us both, bro.”

“I…I’m going…to die here…”

“Now wouldn’t that be an ironic ending.”

****

He thought time was going in reverse.

Not going backwards but just. Not flowing the right way.

Because while the hours upon hours of interrogation and threats and physical pain seemed to drag, the time between them was endless. Nothing but limitless spans of time where nothing was happening. There was no one in the room except for him.

Well, him and those phantoms.

Always, always, always the mocking phantoms.

At least they were familiar.

****

The door to his cell was nearly ripped off it’s hinges by the force that threw it open. Dib watched it through a haze of sedatives as it bounced off the wall and nearly slammed shut again. He figured this was probably a dream of some kind, brought on by drugs and exhaustion.

Mab strode through the door, all fury and elegance, grace and danger, her hair wild about her in a cloud.

Oh yeah, definitely a dream. No way Mab would come to a Foundation site for him.

“Oh Dib…” Her had was warm on his cheek and he chuckled weakly. What a realistic dream this was, “I’m so sorry it took this long to get to you. But with only ZiM and I…”

“Wait until she finds out what you let happen to Simon.” Other Dib said in his ear, “Not that Simon didn’t deserve it, but I mean…”

“Hey! I did so not deserve this!” Simon had his hands on his hips behind Mab, scowling. Blood oozed with syrupy slowness over his fingers, “Sure, it’s Dib’s fault but I didn’t do anything wrong!”

Dib closed his eyes and ducked his head with a whimper.

“Dib? Look at me, please. We need to get out of here. It’s dangerous to stay.”

“Sah—Simon.” Dib wheezed into his chest.

A hesitation.

“I know, darling.” Mab swept him up into her arms and headed for the door, “I know. It will be all right. No one is angry with you. We will all be all right.”

****

There were scars.

Marks on wrists and ankles from struggling. Jagged lines from needles ripped harshly away. Raw red cuts never treated properly because someone had gotten mouthy. A sickening set of stitched together lines that no one talked about.

Those were nothing compared to what happened inside their heads.

****

He tried keeping track of the days.

It was easier when he could see the sun moving across the sky.

Mab helped. She helped them both. 

Simon didn’t move like he used to.

ZiM yelled a lot. That helped too, in a weird way. Dib thought ZiM was angry. He never asked.

Time felt like it was moving normally again.

None of them returned to 1 Tesla Drive.

They moved on. And closed the portal behind them.

[transssexualheart]

Do all, entertain me so I don't have to do hw

ah man i was actually doing hw for once

1- my name?rain

2- do i have any nicknames?my mom calls me rainbow, my brother calls me ron, my friends don’t really call me by any nicknames anymore

3- zodiac sign?leo, borderline virgo 

4- video game i play to chill, not to win?animal crossing

5- book/series i reread?harry potter

6- aliens or ghosts?uhhhh ghosts

7- writer i trust enough to read anything they write?idk if there’s any

8- favorite radio station?i don’t listen to the radio much

9- favorite flavor of anything?watermelon or blue raspberry

10- the word i use all the time to describe something great?idk, i say hell yeah a lot

11- favorite song?robbers by the 1975 probably (im listening to it now lol)

12- the question you ask new friends to get to know them better?i usually ask what they’re doing when we text and they tell and through this over time you hear about their family and intrests

13- favorite word?either “soft” or “gentle”

14- last person who hurt me, did i forgive them?not sure, i think i was the last person to hurt me, and i don’t really forgive myself for anything

15- last song i listened to?robbers by the 1975

16- tv show i always recommend?rick and morty

17- pirates or ninjas?see on one hand i have gay pirates and on the other i have nsp so idk

18- movie i watch when i’m feeling down?probably some pokemon movie lmao

19- song that i always start my shuffle with/wake up song/always on loop song?my alarm is nine in the afternoon by p!atd, i usually shuffle the fiddler on the roof soundtrack starting with the wedding dance song or now i have everything, on loop i usually have do i wanna know by arctic monkeys or sarah smiles by p!atd

20- favorite video games?any pokemon game

21- what am i most afraid of?the people i love secretly hating me or abandoning me or dying

22- a good quality of mine?uhhhhh,,, i guess um. my hair is dark? so it makes it easier to see facial hair and shit on me which is helpful for my trans ass

23- a bad quality of mine?i can’t shut up about anything i’m interested in bc i obsess myself with things that make me happy and always want to talk about them because they’re the the things that keep me alive but it gets annoying and i get a lot of “would you shut up about this subject”

24- cats or dogs?how could i CHOOSE

25- actor/actress you trust enough to watch whatever they’re in?i don’t pay a lot of attention to the actors for ppl in movies, i think the only actor i was willing to go see whatever they were in was u lmao

26- favorite season?spring/autumn

27- am i in a relationship?no

28- something i miss?the way things used to be sometimes

29- my best friend? i’ve considered u my best friend for a long time, if i didn’t delete messages u could probably find me talking to newer ppl (mainly chloe, who was that girl i asked out and rejected me) being like “yeah so she’s my best friend and she’s great”

30- eye color?brown

31- hair color?dark brown

32- someone i love?diakjgbjfgvldgjh

33- someone i trust?i trust u and zee the most

34- someone i always think about?Get Out Of This Home

35- am i excited about anything?dying

36- my current obsession?playing amazing grace on the piano

37- favorite tv shows as a child?i loved sesame street

38- do i have someone of the opposite sex i can tell everything to?not really

39- am i superstitious?idk

40- what do i think about most?what the fuck do you think 

41- do i have any strange phobias?i don’t think so

42- do i prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it?not sure

43- favorite hobbies?drawing, writing, playing piano

44- last book i read?the great american whatever, great book btw, read it if ur looking for more gay books. warning though for death (that’s not really a spoiler i promise)

45- last film i watched?blue is the warmest color, didn’t finish it tho

46- do i play any instruments?piano

47- favorite animals?cats and dogs

48- top 5 blogs on tumblr that i follow?@ dreamts@ maroonracoon@ hugables@ roswater@ fauning

49- superpower i wish i could have?to pause time

50- how do i destress?what

51- do i like confrontation?no

52- when do i feel most at peace?when i sleep

53- what makes me smile?hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

54- do i sleep with the lights on or off?off

55- play any sports?no

56- what is my song of the week?idk the week just started my guy

57- favorite drink?grape juice

58- when did i last send a handwritten letter to somebody?idk

59- afraid of heights?not really

60- pet peeve?when u tell someone to stop fuckin touching u and they keep doing it immediately after

61- what was the last concert i went to see?the 1975!! just last night

62- am i vegetarian/vegan/pescatarian?no 

63- what occupation did i want to do when i was younger?i really wanted to be a singer

64- have i ever had a friend turn into an enemy?i’ve had fights with friends but we either made up or stopped being friends but aren’t enemies

65- what fictional universe would i like to be a part of?idk

66- something i worry about?friends when they’re sad, i know some of them probably won’t but i still worry about them hurting themselves

67- scared of the dark?yeah

68- who are my best friends?you, zee, shannon, spencer, i could go on but there’s a lot

69- what do i admire most about others?musical abilities, especially with singing

70- can i sing?idk, logically i have no reason to think that i can’t because literally everyone that’s ever heard me sing says it’s not bad or that i have a nice voice but i’m still unconvinced

71- something i wish i could do?sing in front of people without having an anxiety attack, speaking of singing

72- if i won the lottery, what would i do?buy myself and my friends a ton of shit probably

73- have i ever skipped school?i’ve faked being sick to get out of school

74- favorite place on the planet?idk man i haven’t been many places

75- where do i want to live?kinda wanna live in nyc

76- do i have any pets?cat named danny, two fish one named goldy and the other shaneeta dee

77- what is my current desktop picture?an nsp concert but i’ve been meaning to change it for a while now

78- early bird or night owl?night owl

79- sunsets or sunrise?sunsets

80- can i drive?no

81- story behind my last kiss?it was so long ago man i can’t really remember

82- earphones or headphones?earphones

83- have i ever had braces?no

84- story behind one of my scars?idk if i have any but i have a scab that i picked at until it bled in piano class because i was Not Ok and many times after for the same reason and that’s probably gonna scar now

85- favorite genre of music?idk

86- who is my hero?idk

87- favorite comic book characters?i don’t really read comic books much

88- what makes me really angry?when people hurt my friends 

89- kindle or real book?real book

90- favorite sporty activity?idk man

91- what is the one thing that isn’t tight in schools that should be???????

92- what was my favorite subject at school?idk man i guess art is ok but i’m not the biggest fan of my teacher

93- siblings?two, one brother and a sister

94- what was the last thing i bought?probably food

95- how tall am i?i think 5′5

96- can i cook?i can make grilled cheese and also pancakes

97- can i bake?if u give me a recipe then probably

98- 3 things i love?my friendspianosleeping

99- 3 things i hate?donald trumpdepressionanxiety

100- do i have more girl friends or boy friends?idk a lot of my friends are non binary or i don’t know their gender

101- who do i get on with better, girls or boys?im tempted to say girls but that’s just bc i have a preference for girls romantically in reality it doesn’t really matter as long as u aren’t a dick

102- where was i born?albany

103- sexual orientation?pan, probably somewhere on the ace spectrum bc sexual attraction is so so rare for me so if i think ur hot u better believe u are

104- where do i currently live?new york

105- last person i texted?you

106- last time i cried?not sure, i think last week when i had that big meltdown that y’all saw where @ hero-art was sending me asks through it

107- guilty pleasure?hhgghg,,hggg, watching vids of u singing

108- favorite youtuber?probably still the game grumps

109- a photo of myselfdamn bitch just search the tag # rain shows you his face

110- do i like selfies?i take a lot, usually just because my makeup looks cool that day, but they’re mostly shit

111- favorite game app?i don’t play game apps

112- my relationship with my parents?:/

113- favorite accents?idk man

114- a place i have not been but would like to visit?metropolitan museum of art

115- favorite number?five

116- can i juggle?no

117- am i religious?no

118- do i like space?it’s cool

119- do i like the deep ocean?it’s pretty

120- am i much of a daredevil?lol no

121- am i allergic to anything?i think grass

122- can i curl my tongue?yeah

123- can i wiggle my ears?no

124- do i like clowns?don’t really have an opinion on them

125- the beatles or elvis?i don’t listen to either of them

126- my current project?my dumbass lab writeup

127- am i a bad loser?i don’t think so

128- do i admit when i’m wrong?yes

129- forest or beach?beach

130- favorite piece of advice?“love everyone, forgive everyone, especially yourself.”

131- am i a good liar?i think so

132- hogwarts house/divergent faction/hunger games district?i’m a gryffindor and i didn’t read divergent or the hunger games

133- do i talk to myself?all the time

134- am i very social?no

135- do i like gossip?maybe? idk as long as no one is hurt

136- do i keep a journal/diary?i guess my writing blog is kind of an over exaggerated diary

137- have i ever hopelessly failed a test?i got a zero on a quiz once if that counts

138- do i believe in second chances?depends

139- if i found a wallet full of cash on the ground, what would i  do?get my mom to turn it in to ppl who know what to do with it

140- do i believe people are capable of change?yeah i suppose, but depends

141- have i ever been underweight?no

142- am i ticklish?very

143- have i ever been in a submarine?no

144- have i ever been on a plane?when i was seven

145- in a film about my life, who would i cast as myself, friends, and family?ah man idk i don’t have an extensive knowledge of actors

146- have i ever been overweight?no

147- do i have any piercings?one in each ear

148- what fictional character do i wish was real?idk

149- do i have any tattoos?two, one on my ankle and another on my ass

150- what is the best decision i have made in my life so far?to realize that i fucked up and to apologize

151- do i believe in karma?i guess

152- do i wear glasses or contacts?i need glasses but don’t wear them much

153- what was my first car?none

154- do i want children?depends on who i’d have them with

155- who is the most intelligent person i know?idk man it’s kinda subjective isn’t it?

156- my most embarrassing moment?my whole entire life

157- what makes me nostalgic?old songs

158- have i ever pulled an all nighter?oh yeah

159- which do i value most in others, brains or beauty?brains

160- what color dominates my wardrobe?idk actually

161- have i ever had a paranormal experience?not really

162- what do i hate most about myself?i’m stupid, i hurt and bother others way too much 

163- what do i love most about myself?ok i’m honestly not being a self loathing dick on purpose here i genuinely can’t think of something i love about myself

164- do i like adventure?yeah

165- do i believe in fate? maybe

166- favorite animal?question already asked bro

167- have i ever been on radio?no

168- have i ever been on tv?no, but yesterday i got asked to be (i declined because of anxiety)

169- how old am i?fourteen

170- one of my favorite quotes?“and you know that it’s not good, that there is no good, that nothing good can ever come out of it. but you do it anyway. and then... well. and then you burn.”

171- do i hold grudges?depends

172- do i trust easily?i don’t think so

173- have i learnt from my mistakes?yeah

174- best gift i’ve ever received?well my computer was p good though i payed for part of it

175- do i dream?yeah

176- have i ever had a night terror?yeah

177- do i remember my dreams, and what is the one that comes to mind?i do, and i just remembered the dream i had where there was this weird ass magical storm by my school that happened once thousands of years before on the same day and ppl thought it was a myth but it wasn’t, it was controlled by some ghost of a little girl and it lasted for weeks and eventually within our small shelter by the school people just died arbitrarily and some died from the storm who went out to try and get food and some starved, and soon all that was left was me and three others and it was horrible because every time we closed our eyes we were afraid we were going to open them and someone would be dead

178- an experience that has made me stronger?idk. probably my dad dying?

179- if i were immortal what would i do?try and undo that immortality or send myself into a coma forever because god i already want to die having to live forever would be the biggest curse ever

180- do i like shopping?sure

181- if i could get away with a crime, what would i do?idk man i don’t think about a life of crime much

182- what does family mean to me?people who care about me and love me and that i care about and love back

183- what is my spirit animal?im p sure that as a white person i’m not supposed to have one

184- how do i want to be remembered?for kindness

185- if i could master one skill, what would i choose?being better at piano

186- what is my greatest failure?everything

187- what is my greatest achievement?don’t know, i’m not proud of many things that i do

188- love or money?love

189- love or career?love

190- if i could time travel, where and when would i want to go?nowhere, i don’t want to spoil the future for myself and i don’t want to fuck with the past

191- what makes me the happiest?FUCK off

192- what is “home” to me?being with someone i love

193- what motivates me?i don’t know. not much anymore

194- if i could choose my last words, what would they be?idk, it depends on who i’d say them to

195- would i ever want to encounter aliens?if they’re nice then yes

196- a movie that scared me as a child?coraline

197- something i hated as a child that i like now?idk

198- zombies or vampires?vampires bc baz

199- live in the city or the suburbs?city

200- dragons or wizards?wizards

201- a nightmare that stayed with me?so this is from when i was little, my dad was driving my brother and i to the park and i was in the backseat bc i was tiny. so i said something to him and got no reply, i looked over and he wasn’t in the front seat, he was gone and nobody was driving. i look out the front and we’re headed for a part where we were meant to turn and there’s a giant steep hill and the car just keeps going forwards. it drives up the hill then flips over and crashes and rolls back down the hill and then i woke up

202- how do i define love?oh gosh. it’s in trusting other people to tell everything, even if they don’t “get” you, even if they won’t understand what you mean or how you feel because you trust them. it’s in the way you feel accepted around them. and all the inside jokes and knowing glances and doing everything you can to help when they’re down and feeling at home around them.

203- do i judge a book by it’s cover?a little

204- have i ever had my heart broken?yeah

205- do i like my handwriting?not really

206- sweet or savory?sweet

207- worst job i’ve had?never had a job

208- do i collect anything?ramune bottles and pokemon cards 

209- item of clothing or jewelry you’ll never see me without?don’t think there is one

210- what is on my bucket list?kiss a girl

211- how do i handle anger?vent to a friend

212- was i named after anyone?not with my first name, but my mom gave me my middle name after her friend from college

213- do i use sarcasm a lot?no.............of course not

214- what tv character am i most like?not sure

215- what is the weirdest talent i have?talent. What Is That

216- favorite fictional character?how could i choose one

thanks for asking  

[bmoharrisbankofficial]

man.