#i suggest u guys listen its catchy

[dustedmagazine]

Dust, Volume 9, Number 11, Part 2

Eli Winter

We only get ten audio clips per post now, so we've split the Dust in two. Check out the early alphabet entries here.

Colin Miller — Haw Creek (Ruination)

Colin Miller’s songs come from far away, from a physical, temporal, emotional remove, like bits of colored memory or the line from a book that meant something once, but you now can’t quote exactly. The North Carolina-based multi-instrumentalist and home taper is connected to the Wednesday orbit, having played on and produced MJ Lenderman albums and produced Wednesday’s I Was Trying to Describe You to Someone. His own music is softer and more indefinite, but very fine. It is less like listening and more like being enveloped by a cloud. “I Don’t Love You Anymore,” for instance, has all the elements of an indie rocker: strummy guitars, punched out drums, and a catchy, tuneful melodic line. And yet it drifts in through the window like a warm breeze, gently stirring your attention as it moves the air around you. “Paper Roof,” too, buzzes with feedback and blistered bass tones, but very softly. What you notice, first, is the high yearning singing, shaded by the fuzz of lo-fi production. You wonder what these songs would sound like with clearer, more commercially viable sonics, whether they’d land with more impact or less. But here they are, gently pushed forward for you to appreciate best after repeat plays, and they are really quite good.

Jennifer Kelly

Niecy Blues — Exit Simulation (Kranky)

The reason the ol’ “this band is like x meets y” trope is both kind of reviled and yet impossible to wipe out is that as a formulation it’s both weak (unless you’re the person the comparison occurred to, chances are good you won’t hear it) and strong (how else to try and describe something as elusive as music than with something so slippery and paradoxical?). It might be better to imagine a kind of topographical map. Then you could try and chart the impossible hinterlands out where the territories of (say) Grouper, trip hop, and Kelela might converge, and somewhere around there you might find Niecy Blues’ first record. Like all such comparisons though, the intent is not to suggest Exit Simulation is mere pastiche or reducible to parts found elsewhere, but to indicate the heady and diverse contemporaries it shares an atmosphere with. Whether it’s the extended reverie of “U Care,” the hazy float of “Violently Rooted,” or the droning shuffle of “The Architect” the result is a debut of striking assurance and depth. Comparisons fail at some point; you really just have to give it a listen yourself and figure out your own map, like Blues has.

Ian Mathers

Bänz Öster and the Rainmakers — Gratitude (self-released)

This quartet consisting of Europeans Bänz Öster on double bass and Javier Vercher on sax and South Africans Afrika Mkhize on piano and Ayanda Sikade on drums delivers spiritual jazz rooted in the gentler music of Coltrane and Ra. The six long (eight to 12 minute) originals, well-recorded before an appreciative but fairly restrained audience, are uplifting and replete with sophisticated soloing, especially by Mkhize. These guys don’t break any new ground, but the grooves are infectious, and what is described in the liner notes as the “high-voltage connection between North and South” contributes to the good vibes.

Jim Marks

Pile — Hot Air Balloon EP (Exploding in Sound)

In case February’s All Fiction didn’t make it clear, the handful of songs from the same sessions that comprise the Hot Air Balloon EP should drive the point home that Pile is a band at the height of its powers. Recent live shows incorporating a few of these songs into setlists only go to further serve that the distinction between what made the cut for their latest full-length and what got left behind is virtually indistinguishable; some of Hot Air Balloon’s fun is in finding where these songs would’ve best worked their way into All Fiction’s track list. The knotty time signature changes and unexpected rock moments still weave and burst forth, and Rick Maguire’s addictive, meandering pathos carries moments you’ll be left thinking about long after it’s over; me personally, I can’t unlodge the descending chorus of “Exits Blocked” or the very specific line on “The Birds Attacked My Hot Air Balloon” where he sings, “I could see your house from here if I’d bothered to look.” It’s these stories in miniature, like Fitzgerald in The Crack-Up or Felix Feneon, that leave their mark most potently — if, of course, you’re inclined to that sort of thing.

Patrick Masterson

Taiko Saito /Michael Griener /Jan Order — WALD (Trouble In The East)

Free improvisation may be a creative space where an instrument’s baggage can be dropped, but this is easier for some than others. Given its limited and highly distinct sound, the vibraphone’s particularly hard to untether from expectation, but Taiko Saito gives it her best shot on WALD. The Sapporo-born, Berlin-based mallet-wielder, who has worked at length with Silke Eberhard and Satoko Fujii, does not totally play against expectation, but she does keep her instrument’s stylistic mandates at bay by shifting between time and no time, swing and no swing, and steering a middle course between the big wall of sound you might expect from, say, Jason Adasiewicz, and the bebop-derived suppression of resonance pursued by an earlier resonance. This CD documents her first encounter with bassist Jan Roder and drummer Michael Griener, who constitute Die Enttäuschung’s rhythm section, and that association will tell you more about their commitment to the moment than what they actually play. Each of the album’s four spontaneously realized tracks is a world unto itself in which chaos is courted, swing cultivated, or slipstreams ridden. These are woods to get lost in.

Bill Meyer

Skyphone — Oscilla (Lost Tribe Sound)

Lost Tribe Sound has been on something of a jag this year with their Maps to Where the Poison Grows series. This new installment by Danish trio Skyphone is an absorbing and succinct 32 minutes in which attention to detail, texture and instrumental interplay account for a lot. Ideas are introduced then carried through to their natural culmination, with each of the three players sounding present and laser-focused in their creative process. Live drum kit, bass, synths, piano, acoustic guitar, and a whole host of other instruments blown and struck are used to bring vivid color. Think early Mum, Opsvik & Jennings, and Kiln. Six of the seven songs here feel just right (centrepiece “Arbonaught” is especially good). It’s only on final track “Will to Change” that the introduction of heavily effected vocals knock things out of balance and breaks the spell. Elsewhere this is masterful and hypnotic stuff.

Tim Clarke

Stella Siebert/Nat Baldwin — 1.30.22 (Notice Recordings)

This live improvisation set from Stella Siebert — mixer, turntable, objects — and Nat Baldwin playing double bass celebrates special techniques and advanced sampling with chaotic jubilation. Sections are taken out of order (we never get to hear the opener), sculpting the set from free play to intentionality. The recording opens with abrupt samples alongside repeated string pressure. “4” has a bit too much piercing sine tone for my taste, but especially diverting is “9” which features crackling vinyl and ostinatos right at the edge between pitch and noise. The concluding track, “2,” is a 23-minute-long session in which Baldwin plays extended techniques against ostinato samples and handmade percussion. The previous material coalesces into an edgy opus that remains varied and imaginative throughout.

Christian Carey

Tar Of — Confidence Freaks Me Out (sound as language)

Tar Of makes music in brief, bubbly spritzes. Heavy on the keyboards, with giddy abstracted vocal parts, these cuts dance across your field of vision and disappear from view. “Ey Vaay,” the single, adds a bobbling saxophone line to the mix, caroming in from the margins as a dizzy pulse of “ba-ba-ba-ba-bas” push the track forward. “Cardinal” clicks and rattles and swells with wordless counterparts. You’ll need to take a breath when it clatters to a halt. The title track is somewhat more song-shaped, with its stabbing snare beat and woozy woodwinds; it seems to be taking on conventional verse-chorus structure when it breaks apart into vibrating, shimmering atoms. The band is a duo from Brooklyn, made up of two oddball artists—Ariyan Basu and Ramin Rahni—but the tracks have the ecstatic density of large ensemble baroque pop. More is always going on than you can really absorb, and you don’t get a lot of time to get acclimated. Blink and these tracks are over. So, don’t.

Jennifer Kelly

Håvard Wiik / Tim Daisy — Slight Return (Relay)

When pandemic protections canceled all the gigs, Tim Daisy proved particularly resourceful. He turned to musicians like Ikue Mori and Vasco Trilla to respond remotely to his drumming, recorded either before or during lockdown, and realized some intriguing music that demonstrated how improvisation is not just an aesthetic stance, but a way to address life problems. But when the shots came out and the numbers went down, he returned to stages and studios, and his relish at being able to tune into an old friend is evident throughout Slight Return. The album’s name acknowledges that Daisy and Berlin-based pianist Håvard Wiik have been together before; ten years ago, to be precise. There’s a charge to this reconnection that affirms the drummer’s excitement at being able to make new music with old acquaintances once more. It sparks a restless vibe, as the two musicians shift fluidly from restrained exploration to unbridled, jointly generated fracas.

Bill Meyer

Eli Winter — A Day Behind the Deadline (Three Lobed)

Guitarist Eli Winter's latest release continues a changing path in his musical career. His early work (meaning “from four years ago”) worked through a blend of Pauline Oliveros theory and Jack Rose solo playing. He's been steadily expanding his sound since then, working with other like-minded artists to produce music that applies the same sensibility to a bigger palette. A Day Behind the Deadline gives listeners a run-down on this movement, collecting five live tracks from fall 2019 through this spring. Winter's typical intricacy in composition now brings in drummer Tyler Damon and pedal steel guitarist Sam Wagster. The collection mostly moves away from Winter's roots aside from the closing solo acoustic “The Time to Come.” The trio tend to stretch out into odd takes on rock or even Americana (though that has more to do with the pedal steel sound that with the actual song structures). A Day Behind doesn't settle as a proper album (and isn't intended to), even if it does cohere. Instead, it plays like a photo album: here's Winter in transition from his acoustic roots to something else. He comes across as restless, looking for something new, and this release fills the gap while he finds that next thing he's looking for.

Justin Cober-Lake

99Letters — Zigoku (Phantom Limb)

Osaka producer Takahiro Kinoshita AKA 99Letters returns with a new collection of industrial techno built from unrecognizable samples of traditional Japanese music. The word Zigoku evokes “Jigoku” the Japanese Buddhist hell and whilst this album is not as dark sounding as its predecessor Makafushigi, Kinoshita says its main theme is death and the afterlife. At times you recognize the tropes of the early 1980s when elements of industrial music crossed over into early electronic dance music often with global world influences, think 23 Skidoo and Clock DVA. Occasionally the cadences of Japanese music appear, a ghostly presence of traditional, folkloric myths. But in the main, Zigoku exists in its own hermeneutic world interrogating both its sources and its environment. The contrast between modernity and tradition gives Kinoshita’s music a particular tension that is constantly building as he probes cultural and philosophic cracks, seeking to capture those small wavering shafts of hope.

Andrew Forell

[thecourtreportersportedjorts]

Top 10 Worst Hit Songs of 2017

In December of each year, Billboard publishes its list of the 100 biggest hit songs of the last 12 months. In response, I take it upon myself to decide which of these songs were the real hits, and which were the biggest misses. As always, I’m starting with the worst. Let’s get started:

10. “Do Re Mi” by Blackbear

If you’ve read my earlier lists, I’ve made it no secret that I’m a big fan of The Weeknd. I’ve been enjoying his relentlessly bleak brand of R&B for years, so I was more than ready to celebrate his ascent on the pop charts with multiple spots on my Best Hit Songs lists in 2015 and 2016. Apart from choosing “Can’t Feel My Face” over Taylor Swift’s incomparable “Style” as my favorite hit song of 2015, I stand by all of it. Unfortunately, any great, successful artist is bound to generate a wave of cut-rate imitators, and thus we now have to deal with blackbear.

When blackbear first appeared on the Billboard Hot 100 last spring, I probably had the same reaction as anyone previously uninitiated: who the hell is this? Prior to this year, the rising R&B singer-songwriter had written and produced for such personality vacuums as G-Eazy and Machine Gun Kelly. He also co-wrote “Boyfriend,” one of Justin Bieber’s biggest and most embarrassing singles to date. If any of that suggests that his breakout single “Do Re Mi” would be a noxious whinge replete with countless fuckboy-isms, you’d only wish it were that good.

Blackbear unfortunately goes the extra mile, topping off his insufferable whining at his “crazy” ex with a failed attempt at wit. “Do, re, mi, fa, so fuckin’ done with you,” the chorus taunts, which becomes awkward when you notice that he’s singing up a minor scale, and the minor solfege progression is do, re, ME, FE, etc. All this is accompanied by a perfunctory Gucci Mane feature and a chord progression that’s eerily similar to The Weeknd’s “Wicked Games,” which is where my issues with the song clicked: when Abel made songs like this, he at least had the good sense not to cast himself in the moral high ground or center his hooks around laughable wordplay. And I thought Bryson Tiller was bad.

9. “Believer” by Imagine Dragons

I’ve been writing these lists for five years now, and while I wouldn’t say that my music taste has changed dramatically since then, it’s certainly expanded enough that I could rewrite my Best Hit Songs lists from 4 or 5 years ago and include songs that weren’t even on my radar before. With that said, doing this for such a long time leads you to wonder if you were ever too quick to heap praise onto something that ultimately didn’t deserve it. And while I wouldn’t say I suddenly dislike any of the songs Imagine Dragons landed on my previous lists, I can no longer call myself a fan when they keep churning out crap like this.

I first mentioned Imagine Dragons in 2012, when I saw them as an innovative new force in rock music, alongside the likes of Gotye and fun. While Gotye still hasn’t followed up his album Making Mirrors, and fun. guitarist Jack Antonoff has made even better music with his Bleachers project, Imagine Dragons doubled down on their stadium-ready sound to diminishing returns. After the sophomore slump Smoke + Mirrors failed to produce major hits, they somehow managed to notch one of their biggest successes yet with “Believer,” a dreary, un-catchy slog of a song.

There are a lot of things that I find deeply annoying about “Believer,” like singer Dan Reynolds audibly straining his vocals on a flat hook, the utterly dour and depressing music backing what should be an uplifting (if not esoteric) set of lyrics, or the “first things first” lyrical structure that gives me Iggy Azalea flashbacks. But my biggest problem with Imagine Dragons in 2017 is that their songs seem entirely calculated to fit into trailers and commercials, and I’ve heard “Believer” in these spaces far more than anything more organic. I don’t believe that rock is inherently more valuable or authentic than pop, rap, etc., but it has no chance of being so if this is the way “rock” is represented in the mainstream.

8. “Tunnel Vision” by Kodak Black

If there is a theme to my lists this year, it’s that content doesn’t exist without context. 2017 has seen countless powerful men rightfully fall from grace as allegations of sexual assault and harassment continue to come out of the woodwork. As somebody who loves to share music, this puts me in an interesting position. Was I right to top my Best Hit Songs of 2014 with “Do What U Want,” Lady Gaga’s infamous collaboration with R. Kelly? Can I, in good conscience, still call Brand New’s Science Fiction one of the best albums on the year? Despite my own investment in this music, I have to second guess whether or not I can actively recommend any of it when such information is readily available. These are tough questions, but at least I don’t have to ask them here since I never liked Kodak Black in the first place.

Horrific legal charges aside, I never understood the appeal of Kodak’s music. Sure, he may choose solid beats once in a while, and he may speak on the gritty realities of the street life, but so many other rappers have done so by using a more intelligible and far less grating voice. So many other rappers have done so without resorting to tired, juvenile punchlines like “That money make me cum, it make me fornicate / I’m the shit, I need some toilet paper.” And so many other rappers at least know that “winning” doesn’t rhyme with “penitentiary.”

Even if you somehow liked this song and wanted badly to separate the art from the artist, you can’t really do that in this case. The edited line “I get any girl I want, any girl I want” originally ended with “I don’t gotta rape,” which is eventually followed by “I need a bitch who gon’ cooperate.” YIKES. The only reason this song is so low on this list is because the beat, provided by the ubiquitous Metro Boomin, deserves so much better. Metro, please stick to working with Future and Migos and stay away from this little shit.

7. “Bad Things” by Machine Gun Kelly feat. Camila Cabello

Overall, I considered 2016 to be a pretty weak year for the pop charts. It’s not that everything was terrible that year, but I remember struggling to put together both of these lists because I was so indifferent to most of the hits. Still, one of the most damning trends to dominate the year was the rise of mediocre white rappers. Both Gnash and Post Malone ranked high on my Worst list, and I probably should have included G-Eazy’s tedious “Me, Myself & I” as a dishonorable mention. This trend hasn’t entirely disappeared, as Malone had a surprisingly successful 2017, but it really should have ended with Machine Gun Kelly.

The first of the many bad things about “Bad Things” is the generous sample of Fastball’s 1999 hit song “Out of My Head.” I already have reservations about songs with such recognizable samples - even in songs like “Anaconda” that I otherwise like - and this is no exception, since the sample doesn’t really add any personality or texture to the song. The chorus just gets witlessly rewritten and clumsily regurgitated by Camila Cabello, who only sounds slightly less like a goat than she did on “Work From Home.” Of course, the song also borrows Fastball’s chord progression, which sounds like ass when paired with this Marshmello-lite production.

Even worse is MGK, who’s trying his damnedest to sound like the personification of white alpha male posturing. The only time his delivery suits the track is when he attempts to add a melody in the pre-chorus, and even then it results in serious tonal whiplash. There’s also a baffling R.E.M. reference in his second verse, as if desecrating one 90’s alternative rock band wasn’t enough. I would call the title of the song truth in advertising, but it’s more of an understatement.

6. “Swang” by Rae Sremmurd

I first discussed Rae Sremmurd in 2015 when “No Type” made the #9 spot on my Worst list. And while I still stand by the song’s inclusion, I don’t have much against these guys. Sure, SremmLife had more misses than hits - including the milk-aged, deeply regrettable “Up Like Trump” - but I can take solace in that they earned their biggest success with “Black Beatles,” their best song. On top of that, collaborations with French Montana and Jhene Aiko could position Swae Lee as a breakout solo star with a charismatic (if amateurish) vocal presence.

It’s for that exact reason why “Swang” is such a failure. Critics have routinely praised the duo for their infectious energy, but for the duration of the song, very little of that energy really translates. The production from P-Nazty trades the thunderous, off-kilter synths that made “Black Beatles” so invigorating for something much more warbly, cheap and lifeless. Swae Lee spends the majority of his time droning on words like Alaska Thunderfuck on quaaludes, and by the time Slim Jxmmi attempts to liven things up, it’s too little too late.

“Swang” isn’t an entirely sleepy affair, however. The track has one truly memorable trick up its sleeve - and that’s when Swae leaps into his falsetto during the hook. And it sounds hideous. It’s not quite as ear-splittingly awful as the drop on “Starving” last year, but it doesn’t even have that song’s sense of momentum. It almost sounds like the shower scene from Psycho, only without any real buildup leading to the aural carnage.

5. “Shape of You” by Ed Sheeran

Overplay doesn’t tend to factor into my selections for these lists, a fact which is evident when you see that my Best list for 2015 included songs like “Hello” and “Shut Up and Dance.” This is because I don’t listen to the radio or randomized pop playlists very frequently. I’ll seek out the most popular songs once, and whether or not I keep hearing the song usually depends on how much I like it. That said, sometimes a song becomes inescapable, and the more you hear it, you notice more and more problems with it.

This takes us conveniently to “Shape of You,” Ed Sheeran’s first ever #1 single on the Hot 100. Admittedly, I thought this song was decent at first, and so I’d listen to it once in a while when I needed to scratch the itch. But when I decided I was done with it after a few weeks, I started hearing it pretty much everywhere, and then it clicked: this song is incredibly stupid.

First of all, Ed Sheeran is somewhere among the final few names on my hypothetical list of people I want to hear making songs about sex. “Shape of You” is certainly more competent than I’d imagine a sex song would be coming from Danny DeVito, but it’s also weirdly lacking in personality, which makes sense since he didn’t write this with himself in mind. Like “Cheap Thrills” last year, “Shape of You” was originally intended for Rihanna, who’s probably getting annoyed by all these white songwriters trying to pitch her such watered-down, vaguely Caribbean sounding pop tunes.

Of course, I could just be wishing that the song lacked personality, because Ed can’t resist using his same Sheeranisms that have soiled so many of his stabs at pop. In addition to an out-of-place Van Morrison shoutout (which he couldn’t even confine to one song), the song has a host of clumsy, overwritten lyrics. “Your love was handmade for somebody like me.” “We talk for hours and hours about the sweet and the sour.” That whole chorus. “Shape of You” scans as an OkCupid message from a dude with no social skills. Now imagine getting that same message about 500 more times, and you’ve got one of the most overplayed trainwrecks in recent memory.

4. “Don’t Wanna Know” by Maroon 5 feat. Kendrick Lamar / “Cold” by Maroon 5 feat. Future

For this entry on the list, I’ll be doing something different - I’m giving it to two songs. Sure, this is occasionally done as an excuse to avoid making a concrete decision, but there’s a genuine reason this time. The songs in question are “Don’t Wanna Know” and “Cold,” both by rock band-turned-space-wasters Maroon 5. These two songs are essentially minor variations on each other, and all the more evidence that Adam Levine and his producers band need to go away.

“Don’t Wanna Know” was released late last year, while the charts were still saturated with so much half-assed tropical house. The lyrics feature Levine at his most petulant and unlikeable, harping on an ex so much that the characteristically repetitive chorus just sounds more like a failed defense mechanism. As awful as all this is, it’s nothing compared to the fact that these guys managed to rope in Kendrick Lamar - arguably one of the most important and talented artists of this decade - and make him suck. It’s a brief 8-bar verse, and yet half of the bars feature words rhyming with each other. There’s one thing I do wanna know after hearing this dreck - what Kendrick’s paycheck looked like.

Oh-so-cleverly released on Valentine’s Day this year, “Cold” effectively treads the same water as the other song. It’s more turgid tropical bullshit, only at a slighter quicker tempo. The lyrics are even more bitter, bordering on misogynistic at points. Another A-list rapper features, but this time, it’s Future, and while his verse is pretty average by his own standards, he sounds incredibly uncomfortable over this beat. Nothing about this song disappoints me as much Kendrick’s verse on “Don’t Wanna Know,” but it might be slightly worse by virtue of being more of the same.

Both of these songs were released well before their cluelessly titled album Red Pill Blues was even announced, and they were formally left off the standard track listing. Still, because of their chart success, they were included on the deluxe edition of the album, if only to represent the death of tropical house as a viable trend and an enjoyable sound in pop. And, of course, the death of Maroon 5 as anything resembling an actual band.

3. “JuJu on that Beat (TZ Anthem)” by Zay Hilfigerrr and Zayion McCall

Since Billboard first put a greater emphasis on streaming in their calculations, it’s been interesting to see how songs perform on the charts. As a whole, album tracks chart longer than ever, and the last two years have seen such unexpected chart-toppers like “Panda” and “Bodak Yellow” thanks to the popularity of hip-hop on streaming services. Unfortunately, this also means that songs are also more likely to become genuine hits off of viral novelty than quality. It happened with the execrable “Watch Me” in 2015, and it nearly two years later, it happened with “Juju on That Beat.”

In retrospect, I may have been a little too hard on “Watch Me” when I named it the second worst song of 2015. I mean, we were still in the middle of Meghan Trainor’s window of relevance when it came out, and 2017 has seen rappers draw even more attention to their distinctive ad-libs. “Watch Me,” while still pretty grating, seems quaint and harmless now. The same can’t be said about “Juju on That Beat,” which is just as annoying and insulting to the intelligence as it was a year ago.

Let’s start with “That Beat,” which is lifted wholesale from Crime Mob’s crunk staple “Knuck If You Buck.” Forget what I said about the “Out of My Head” sample in “Bad Things,” this is particularly lazy. While rappers have used pre-existing beats in the past, this is clearly a dance song. Aren’t dance songs were supposed to have a unique musical identity to make up for inconsequential lyrics? The only audible difference is that the beat is transposed to a higher key, which makes sense if it’s meant to suit aspiring one hit wonders Zay Hilfigerrr and Zayion McCall’s more youthful voices.

It’s too bad that their voices still don’t sound remotely good. Hilfigerrr (not that the name matters) is particularly irritating, his out-of-breath yelps cracking like his balls just dropped mid-recording. And while I may have critiqued “Watch Me” for lacking actual rap verses, maybe it was for the better, as the other guy attempts to freestyle, only rhyming the first two of his eight bars and dropping such gems as “if I compared me and you, there wouldn’t be no comparings.” The only good thing about this song is that it’s mercifully short, perhaps the shortest hit song of 2017 that wasn’t by XXXTentacion or Lil Pump. By comparison, “Watch Me” is a masterpiece in minimalism.

2. “Say You Won’t Let Go” by James Arthur

I’m pretty sure my decision to name “Treat You Better” the worst song of 2016 might have been strange for some. Sure, I’ve seen the song on several similar lists (including one that has it in the same position), but the general public actually seems to enjoy the song a lot. Maybe that has to do with the fact that the music is so blandly inoffensive that most people wouldn’t bat an eye at the content. But apart from the patronizing lyrics and the laughable singing, that was part of my problem. White-guy-with-acoustic-guitar songs tend to piss me off because they’re churned out by dudes with aspirations to Real Musicianship whose compositional skills are limited, so the lyrics tend to be transparent in their douchebaggery. And while very, very few things are as bad as “Treat You Better,” James Arthur’s “Say You Won’t Let Go” fits this mold to a T.

As with seemingly all music this year, some context is necessary. James Arthur won The X Factor in 2012 (which should tell you everything about this guy’s musical persona) before signing to Simon Cowell’s Syco Records imprint and eventually releasing songs in which he used homophobic and Islamophobic insults and compared himself to a terrorist. He left Syco in 2014, but two years later, he released Back from the Edge, an album whose title practically begs for sympathy for his lack of a filter. “Say You Won’t Let Go” was the immensely successful lead single, which somehow lasted on the Hot 100 for a full year.

Perhaps knowing all this before hearing the song colored my distaste for “Say You Won’t Let Go” from the jump, but I think this song is fucking terrible. Over acoustic strumming and an infinitely recycled chord progression, Arthur recounts when he first met the love of his life, including a deeply unflattering line where she vomits (again with that filter!). The rest of the song delves into the same territory that Ed Sheeran already exhausted with “Thinking Out Loud,” and the whole thing just scans as incredibly disingenuous coming from him. Hell, he even describes the song as “really calculated” in his annotations on Genius.

Truthfully, the content and the context are the least unpleasant things about this song. James Arthur nearly mumbles through the verses before bringing his voice up another octave for the chorus, which sounds like a drunken bro singing “You’re Beautiful” at Karaoke. A lot of people have praised his vocals, but I might just hate them even more than “Swang” because at least Swae Lee sounded like he was enjoying himself. James just sounds ready to throw up, which is probably karma at work after that lyric in the first verse (not to mention pretty much anything this guy has said that put him at the edge in the first place).

Before I unveil my pick for the worst hit song of 2017, here are eight dishonorable mentions:

“Chained to the Rhythm” by Katy Perry feat. Skip Marley: 2017 was not a good year for Katy Perry, whose self-awareness seems to be diminishing with each album cycle. “Chained to the Rhythm” was the ever-so-obviously co-written by Sia lead single, which boasts an extremely out-of-place guest verse from Bob Marley’s grandson and perhaps one of the clumsiest hooks of the entire year.

“Thunder” by Imagine Dragons: At least “Chained to the Rhythm” had an actual hook, not just chipmunked repetitions of a single word. Because it’s an Imagine Dragons song in 2017, it’s also padded out a with a trap beat, more vague nothings in the verses and grossly manipulated vocals in place of any actual instrumental tones.

“Mercy” by Shawn Mendes: It’s nowhere near as condescending and misogynistic as “Treat You Better,” but it’s every bit as whiny and overwrought, even sharing the same warbled vocals incessant drum beat. Really, it’s a damn shame he didn’t actually drown in the music video.

“Drowning” by A Boogie Wit Da Hoodie feat. Kodak Black: Speaking of drowning, isn’t a song with this title and these piano chords supposed to be about something more interesting than bragging about jewelry? Also, an accused rapist shows up to mumble and make awful jokes about farts. Let’s move on.

“Look at Me!” by XXXTentacion: Oh yeah, there was also this guy, who’s been accused of some extremely disturbing stuff (seriously, trigger warning). I can appreciate some more aggression in the beat and even X’s flow, but the distortion makes everything nearly incomprehensible, which is probably alright since the lyrics amount to little more than edgelord crap. Fuck this.

“Down” by Marian Hill: “Down” doesn’t really have any personality to speak of, driven almost entirely by a woman’s breathy voice, which later gets manipulated into a boilerplate trap beat. Seriously, what is it about this kind of pretentious “indie” pop wallpaper that attracts such an audience?

“Issues” by Julia Michaels: I’ve talked a lot of shit about Julia Michaels and her frequent collaborator Justin Tranter in the past, but “Issues” is actually a pretty compelling exploration of mental health and relationships, and Julia is a distinctive vocalist in her own right. Unfortunately, the song does have issues, and one of them is how bad it needs to pick up the goddamn pace.

“All Time Low” by Jon Bellion: Jon Bellion has a lot of potential as a songwriter and producer, but his vocals sound a lot like Adam Young with slightly more testosterone. The lyric about masturbation is questionable too, but I simply can’t hear that chorus without thinking of this video.

And now, for what I consider worst hit song of 2017:

1. “Body Like a Back Road” by Sam Hunt

Choosing between this and “Say You Won’t Let Go” for the bottom slot on my list was admittedly much harder than usual, but the decision ultimately came down to one thing. Sure, James Arthur’s song disgusts me on a very primal level, to a point where I can’t really listen to the chorus without wincing. But would the song really bother me that much if Arthur weren’t a total dick with a horrific voice? Probably not. Thus, I had to choose a song that was so unequivocally bad that literally nobody could make it work. I had to choose a song in which the awfulness was spelled out right in the title: “Body Like a Back Road.”

Before we open the can of worms that is this song, one thing needs to be addressed. Yes, this is a bro-country song. In 2017. I could maybe see the appeal if this were released in 2014, which was not only the saturation point for this embarrassing subgenre, but also for the DJ Mustard production style that this song clearly takes its influence from. But in 2017, country music has thankfully been working back towards a more organic sound, and DJ Mustard has been replaced by guys like Metro Boomin and Mike Will Made It as hip-hop’s guiding hand. From the word “go,” this song is dated and lame.

Of course, lame is a huge understatement for the lyrical content. You can infer a lot of things from the title alone, and it’s even worse than you might expect. Sam Hunt seems to dedicate this song to his fiancee, which is perhaps one of the most misconceived gifts imaginable. For fuck’s sake, Sam, you’re a country singer. It’s par the course that you’ve been on a back road before, you should know damn well that this comparison is insulting. As if that weren’t bad enough, he attempts to elaborate, waxing unpoetic about her “curves” (a word he draws out in a particularly grating manner) and how the two of them “go way back like Cadillac seats.” While the imagery is more consistent than Train’s abominable “Drive By,” it’s just as gross.

But really, the most egregious crime “Body Like a Back Road” commits is just flat-out sounding like ass. Hip-hop and country don’t exactly have a lot of aesthetic common ground to begin with, so when the rap producer this guy attempts to emulate is DJ Mustard, the whole track ends up sounding as cheap and awkward as his early abortions like “Rack City.” There’s also the weirdly lightweight live drums, not to mention whatever the hell is playing that melody in the intro and bridge. The whole song is so out of touch with the times that I’m convinced it wasn’t just a Montevallo demo. Sadly, it seems the bro-country trend never really went away, and maybe it still has legs to stand on (legs that, at some point, it’ll probably try to compare to the confederate flag or something). But last year proved that mainstream country can be so much better than this, so let’s just hope that this subgenre finally dies for real this time.

Thanks for reading my list, I should be uploading the Best Hit Songs of 2017 later this week!

[sovonight]

alright i’ve gone through the rest of blacklight journal 3 (and took some blurry pics which i’ve uploaded here! somewhat incomplete, but i was mainly going for the invisible ink content anyway. the ink has a hard time glowing when there’s black ink behind it-- it looks clear in person, i promise!)

and now my opinions,

reading through the whole book again: GOD I LOVE FORD SO MUCH

tho ford’s handwriting is as much of a pain to read as i remember. it’s only slightly less painful because i’ve read the journal before and know what to expect. tbh the kids’ entries were a breath of fresh air

some of the journal entries have been extended/embellished in non-invisible content, right? fancier paper can’t be the only thing that made the journal thicker, and there’s definitely stuff i don’t remember reading from the regular journal

yo ford brings up social interaction up a lot but like, at least he had college friends, plural

“This guy should spend less time reaping and more time at the gym!” i still can’t get over ford’s transition from scrawny nerd to buff nerd. who woulda thought.

it was nice to have the caesar/atbash/a1z26 ciphers written out! it holds little practical use, but i just think the tiny letters look cute

ford’s silly and i love him

“The thought that Earth is being used for extraterrestrial advertisement depresses me deeply” -- you and me both, bud. finally an opinion of ford’s pertaining to aliens that i can agree with

canon tarot card assignments! and some of them even line up with these

ford could possibly have been coming up with a catchy nickname for weirdmageddon for 30 whole years, and weirdmageddon is what he decided on. after 30 possible years of deliberation.

“I also tried to choose which theoretical physics books would be most fun to spend 50 years rereading, but they’re all so great I couldn’t decide!“ NERD

i sat there for a good 2 seconds until i decided that rather than the usual cipher, it must be a word scramble. then it made sense

“absolutely, unequivocally not” lollll

i want to see what ford was like when he was compiling journal 2. also, what on earth possessed him to leave his most dangerous journal at an elementary school? come on, man!

that lil frowny face

i trust that retina damage statement bc my eyes hurt from constantly flipping the lights on and off while trying to read ford’s passages

all post-finale fanfiction where ford does NOT eventually get bionic eyes is now non-canon-compliant

thank goodness, ford went straight for the newspapers. at least i got 1 headcanon right

god, ford, why would it be whales? it’d be octopuses! octopuses are where it’s at

“Air is great. Really can’t overemphasize how great air is“ god i love him

"Check out the Eurythmics’ latest chart-topper!” 1) oh thank goodness, now i know i could listen to his music, 2) finally someone else who uses s’ rather than s’s, 3) prepare for a world of disappointment my man because literally none of the things you’ve been listing is happening

i assumed that because i’d already decoded everything in the regular journal, i’d have decoded most of what’s in the blacklight version, so i mostly ignored the cryptograms this time around. if i’m wrong, though, that leaves a treat for future me!

a whole initiation ceremony and everything! ford knows what’s up

but honestly though, i decoded that last sentence at the end and tossed the blacklight onto my bed w a sound, smiling-- it’s official-feeling, you know? what a nice little addition. makes the silliness i feel in doing it feel unfounded

gf just brings this feeling of childhood & adventure & possibility that i haven’t rly had since like, elementary and middle school. and not just that, it makes me feel like there’s more out there and that feeling like there’s more isn’t...silly. it brought the magic back, u guys. i might cry.

again, i wish i’d had gravity falls as a kid, but i guess i’m close enough. and at least with this timing i get to drop $150 on a copy of my favorite character’s research journal! i needed a job to make this purchase

also, i saw the bit of discontentment around the journal numbers that went out (you know, whatever # out of 10000 and all that) and though i kind of did hope for lower digits since i ordered practically on the day it went up, the number i did get is pretty nice! sixes and ones, plus it’s reversible. i would’ve found something to like in any number i got, really. trying to exercise my optimism more

and using post-it notes to stick the photos/inserts back on is working out pretty well! thanks for the suggestion. they come off if i’m not careful enough when turning the page, but i’d rather they come off than stick forever haha. i wonder how they got the photos on so neatly in the first place? what a small margin for error

and there it is, back in its cozy packaging, ready to be buried in the forest somewhere!

ive appreciated the good times but it’s too expensive for me to regularly handle-- i’ll damage my regular copy of journal 3, thanks!

[searching404]

Haikyuu!! Music headcannons

Daichi: you know dadchi's ass is listening to dad music. Classic rock and jimmy buffet. He tries to say he likes modern pop music to escape his tragic dad stereotype but the guy just cant get into it.

Suga: suga listens to soft indie shit. Any song you can imagine playing in the background of a wes anderson movie he has on his playlist. He can never be in charge of the aux cuz everyone would just get really lost in thought and wonder where their lives are headed.

Asahi: this soft soft boi loves a good disney instrumental playlist. A whole new world? What a bop. A whole new world played on piano? HOLY SHIT a big ol bop. He can also get down with sugas music. Calms him.

Nishanoya: noya is a big fan of modern rap. Kendrick lamar, drake, nicki minaj, anything with a good beat. He also likes smash mouth but not for the meme of it. He gets shit on big time for this. He tries to get asahi to jam with him and go to concerts but hes cool with seeing one of asahi's indie bands at a coffee shop. Makes the world seem softer.

Tanaka: you just KNOW this boy likes old school hip hop. Nas,NWA, Biggie,etc. He loves songs about a struggle or just about living life. He loves those old school vibes and his clothes reflect this a lot of the time. He also likes a lof of modern chart toppers. Home boy just loves to get down.

Narita: my boy is the type to find one real obscure or foreign song and just listen to that over and over again on repeat. Bedroom blue by wilder and pappaoutai by stromae have been big ones in the past.

Kinoshita: OLD BOPS! sam cooke and the temptations. He loves cooking and having sam cooke playing in the background. Hes a peaceful boy and loves tuning out the world for a bit and just listening to timeless music. His grandparents always played old tunes around the house and he's learned to love the nostalgic and warm feelings the music gives him.

Kagayama: even kagayama doesnt even know what tunez he likes. He doesnt really get music too much in the lyrical sense. He only needs a catchy beat to like a song. He does sometimes turn on some classical music to attempt studying. Usually if someone hands him the aux he just clicks a spotify playlist for the top 40 and hopes for the best. Or he fucks with them and blasts hilary duff.

Hinata: hinata loves karaoke hits. He loves those songs that makes everyone eyes light up and cause the whole room to stop amd start singing along. Sweet caroline, piano man, call me maybe, anything everyone knows even if hes just listening to it by himself. Also makes for good shower singing songs. Lil sunshine boy loves that shit cuz hes such a fuckin good dude.

Tsukishima: my literal trash son probably really likes alternative music. Arctic monkeys, cage the elephant, alabama shakes. Hes a rude boi with soft boi music habits. Sound and color by alabama shakes and cigarette daydreams by cage the elephant are his go to 'i dont wanna talk to anyone so i gotta pop on some headphones' song choices. Chills his ruffness. He also has a study mu

Playlist full of norwegian songs cuz he cant do classical that much when studying but he can do pop beats in a language he just doesnt fucking understand. Et juleevangelium? Cool bud. Dont know what u said AT ALL but sounds dope. He probs is the most likely to make the party playlist too and makes it a perfect collection of everyones music tastes but only because yams suggests that if he doesnt make it, ya boi tanaka will.

Yamaguchi: so this good one loves musicals. Hamilton took over his life for a while and he will never pass up a good One Day More sing along. Good boys love good music. Its a fact. So he loves all bangers. Anything to dance to or act out a dramatic or fun scene to are autimatically on his playlist. Him and tsuki always blast musical sing along playlists in the car and its a lil bonding thing for them. You dont just sing la vie boheme with someone and not become closer buds. Just doesnt happen.

Kiyoko: this goddess loves a bunch of types of music. Beyonce, elton john, joan jet and a bunch of other artists. She loves songs that she can run too. She tends to just flip on the radio to get ready in the morning so she can find new songs everyday and sometimes hear an old track to dance too while she does her make up. Just a pure gal.

Yachi: yachi is the type of shy that will never let you know what type of music she likes. Shes into k-pop and will jam with yams to musical hits. Yachi really likes happy music. Sad music just make her worry more but if she is sad she has a little playlist for 'rainy days' thats full of sad tunes but she'll sprinkle in some sad but nice songs like holes by layla to give her a lil break. Her go to happy song is conqueror by aurora. She loves any song by her. The team will sometimes send her some happy songs they really like when they think she looks anxious. This lil ball of timidness and anxiety cant handle the absolute bangerz tanaka and nishanoya send her but she appreciates them none the less.

Sorry for saying boy/boi way too much

[drippeddaily]

Album of the Year #22: J.I.D – The Never Story

Album of the Year #22: J.I.D – The Never Story

Artist: J.I.D

Album: The Never Story

Listen:

YouTube

Spotify

Apple Music

Tidal

Yeezy Sound

Background by /u/ItsBigVanilla

The scene: East Atlanta, 1990. Halloween. A baby is born, kicking and screaming. His name: Destin Route. Destin is the youngest of seven brothers and sisters moving from low-income house to low-income house, by all means an ordinary black boy born in Atlanta. He’s a jittery kid; his grandma tells him so. He grows up around others like himself, he sees his peers sell drugs to feed their families, he knows his situation.

Destin gets older, makes his way through his classes. High school ends and he keeps moving, gets accepted to Hampton University in Virginia, plays football. He’s in college now: a new chapter in his life, new experiences, new friends. New friends: Olu and Eian, a.k.a. Venus and Doc. They’re rappers, call themselves Earthgang. Destin’s interested. He remembers growing up, listening to Wu-Tang Clan, that New York shit, Outkast, of course, D’Angelo, too.

2012: he gets kicked out of school. What’s next? He decides to focus on the music. Isn’t that what everybody does when they have nothing left to do? The difference is, Destin’s better than most. He writes a bit, records a bit, links up with Earthgang a bit, next thing he knows he’s got a mixtape: Route of Evil. He’s a rapper now, he starts calling himself J.I.D, as in, the jittery kid that grandma used to say he was. He likes it, he’s having fun with it, he keeps writing. 2013: mixtape number two, Para Tu, drops it right before his 23rd birthday.

More songs with Earthgang, they form a collective: Spillage Village. Put out an album: Bears Like This. Things are heating up, they’re gaining traction, they get an offer: open up for Ab-Soul on his next tour. J.I.D jumps at the chance, gets out there on stage and raps his heart out. He’s getting the hang of this, now. Drops an EP, Dicaprio, and still keeps writing. Keeps putting out music: Bears Like This Too with Spillage Village. Keeps touring: this time he opens for Bas, who he worked with on the Ab-Soul tour. Keeps writing: Bears Like This Too Much is next. They even managed to get a J. Cole feature on this one.

Cole hears his stuff; he likes it. This could be the next step for J.I.D. He gets the offer of a lifetime: Cole says sign with me. Drop your debut album on my label, Dreamville. This is his shot at legitimacy. This is his chance to see his music make an impact. He accepts the offer, of course. Who wouldn’t? Then he gets to work on The Never Story.

Review by /u/ItsBigVanilla

The Never Story begins with a smooth chorus of voices, opening the album with the positive affirmation “Everyone’s a star / Every day’s the move / Everywhere you are is for you”. As the lines are repeated, another voice comes into play: a youthful, crooning, almost squeaky voice, a voice that doesn’t appear to foreshadow a rap album at all. A minute passes, the chorus stops, and in come the drums as listeners are eased into the first track, “General”. What’s immediately gripping about the track is the production (done by Latrell James & Oz theAdditive): it’s steady, layered, and thumping, glued together by a deep bass line and an atmosphere that suggests there’s danger around the corner. And like clockwork, the danger appears as J.I.D makes his entrance, spitting a head-bopper of a verse that manages to sound meticulously written and off-the-cuff at the same time. Rapping about life in Atlanta, racism, and his own experiences, the rapper comes across as honest and lyrical, qualities rare in such a catchy tune.

Instead of risking overstaying its welcome, the track ends, transitioning into “Never”, which opens with a sinister, cloudy (Childish Major & Christo Welch) beat that would make Norf Norf proud. “Never been shit, never had shit / Never knew shit, never out, never do shit damn / But a nigga never gave two shits” raps J.I.D in one of the album’s catchiest hooks, sliding into another verse introspective enough to keep listeners thinking while they try to keep up with the flow, which sprawls and bounds around the production effortlessly, stopping and starting again at will, never feeling slightly off-base. The production stays exciting, constantly being ramped up or cut out at moments that perfectly accentuate J.I.D’s lyricism without overshadowing it, and halfway through the song, the entire track shifts gears with a completely unexpected beat switch. Suddenly, the track goes from misty to robotic, and J.I.D goes from introspective to braggadocious, coming in hot with perhaps one of the year’s best set of opening lines: “What you call a chick that don't suck dick? You don't/ And if you think you finna come up this, you won't/ Down comes the boogie and up jumps the funk/ This beat takin' a beating, I hand out the lumps.” From this point on, the track explodes with an energy as of yet unheard on the album.

Following “Never” is “EdEddnEddy”, a mellow track that sees J.I.D utilizing his trademark lazy flow in a lazy way, floating along another beat that’s almost impossible not to move along to (produced by Hollywood JB). At this point in the tracklist, the album’s appeal is clear: fantastic production, well written and quotable lyrics, and a fresh new voice in hip-hop, proving he can tackle a wealth of styles and come out on top every time. “Me and my two niggas be like Ed Edd and Eddy”, he raps, and on the next track, “D/vision”, frequent collaborators Venus and Doc of Earthgang, the other “Eds”, make their appearance. “D/vision” features what may be the most impressive technical rap on the album, as the three MCs attempt to one-up each other over freestyle-inspiring J. Cole production.

Next up are “Hereditary” and “All Bad”, two of the album’s mellowest moments. The triumphant, guitar-and-piano production (by Officials) of “Hereditary” paves the way for one of J.I.D’s most melodic performances, showcasing his ability to tread the line between rapping and singing, all while offering up a hook that’s sure to get stuck in listener’s heads. On “All Bad”, things slow down even further as J.I.D goes full R&B, accompanied by understated, soulful vocals from Mereba. Thanks to producer Hollywood JB, the song feels funky and sexy, at once reminiscent of Isaiah Rashad while managing not to sound too much like anybody else. The track is so downtempo that it almost threatens to bring the album to a complete halt, but it works as another interesting chapter in The Never Story.

The atmosphere is quickly revitalized by “Underwear”, one of the album’s darkest-sounding affairs. J.I.D plays around on the hook, alliterating in a seemingly offhand way (“Melancholy cool / Matthew McConaughey / on a money mission”) and cracking the classic “underwear/under where” joke, the gold standard of elementary schools across the country. However, the trap-inspired, piano-laden production by Christo Welch gives way to a few energetic, instantly memorable verses that turn the track into one of the project’s highlights.

Slipped in between two of the most single-worthy tracks is the Childish Major-produced “8701”, a short, punchy track that features a verse from fellow Atlanta artist 6LACK. While the track’s autotune-over-guitar and under two minute runtime make it feel a bit out of place and transitory, it still stands as a satisfying song in its own right. “8701” leads into “Hoodbooger”, another playful and vibrant song that feels like an upbeat counterpart to “Underwear”. The track, produced by 808 Blake, originally appeared on J.I.D’s Dicaprio EP, but it fits in perfectly here as yet another lyrically infectious moment full of charisma and swagger.

Before the album’s end comes “Somebody”, a song that sounds like it would make surprisingly reasonable background music on Sesame Street. The positive vibes come in the form of Imaginary Kids production that sounds like sunshine and a hook that could give MF DOOM the warm-and-fuzzies (“Everybody gotta be something / Everybody wanna be something / … Everybody gotta love somebody”). J.I.D raps about his choice to make a name for himself in the rap game, and by the time his verses are up, you’re bound to feel like you want to give it a shot, too. While the song’s tone might seem out of place on the tail end of the album, it demonstrates just how diverse of an artist that J.I.D is, while providing some levity before the album’s final, definitive moment.

The Never Story goes out with a bang, not a whimper, as the concluding track, “Lauder”, starts off with a braggadocious proclamation that feels well deserved at this point: “Okay I told motherfuckers I was sick as a bitch / The dopest dope you smoke gon’ get you a whiff / Watch how these niggas flip the script with the flick of they wrist / Southern lyricists don’t exist like my flow is a myth”. More J. Cole production creates a landscape for J.I.D’s most personal effort yet, spitting verses about his brother, (“My brother was locked up for shooting at the enemy / Caught one nigga then caught fifteen / I ain’t meet that nigga ‘till I was fifteen”), his ambitions, (“I silently swore solemnly / That I would be the guy to make my black people proud of me / Roses to the mothers of anybody that doubted me”), and his passion for rapping (“My pen carries my many sins / The irony the iron can’t straighten out any wrinkle in existence”). The track is a major highlight, perhaps even the best song on the album, and definitely the best way to end it.

The album ends on a high note that, most importantly, feels earned. Running at 40 minutes, 11 tracks and an intro manage to come together to feel cohesive yet diverse, lyrical yet quotable, and to hint at what’s to come. J.I.D emerges victorious, a fresh new personality in the rap game, and a big personality at that. The project seeps with talent; whether it be from J.I.D, the guest artists, or the producers, everyone involved brings the heat and sets the stage for the start of a long, potentially brilliant career. As an album, The Never Story is fantastic; as a debut, it’s excellent.

Favorite Lyrics by /u/ItsBigVanilla

Alright, what you call a chick that don't suck dick? You don't

And if you think you finna come up this, you won't

Down comes the boogie and up jumps the funk

This beat takin' a beating, I hand out the lumps

• “Never”

I'm a stallion, stout, strong, war ready, resilient

Guess the Lord put me in position just to kill niggas

A warrior, but words used is my spear, my sword, my fear, my Lord, my chance is void if I

Do it for myself and don't give back to the loyal

The unemployed, all my boys in here

Okay, let's really make some noise in here

• “D/vision”

Look like I gotta bust heads like bruh said nigga suspect

And I don't play muhfuckin nut check, this a gut check

After I done killed y'all, imma hit your bitch up and have a slut fest

No Morris Chestnut, bitch nut chest

Leave the nigga in the past where the dust is

This a 100 round drum, nigga duck this

• “Underwear”

Yeah, too many hoes on my D-I-C-K

I run the game like V-I-C-K

You ain't talking shit, no habla Englais

I can cock that thing back and pon de replay

I'ma be the man, and I know that you feel it

Fast-forward, in five years in LA in a Bentley

I been a Renaissance, finna send a bomb

Hit him in his arm, leg, head, nigga swam oceans for the commas

• “Hoodbooger”

Let's get it poppin', they're pulling pistols on apostle Paul

So paid the piper or meet the sniper legend of the fall

I knew in diapers you and I was nothing alike at all

I do or die, you do it to die, I'm really making calls

You couldn't kill it and take it out of me

The ideology, this the odyssey

I'm Odysseus, you gotta follow me

Watch how I maneuver, I influence the influencers

The flow is like the flu in influenza going through the motion

So I motivate all of my niggas, they tell me kill 'em with kindness

I'd rather kill 'em and they're other significants

• “Lauder”

Discussion Questions by /u/ItsBigVanilla

• J.I.D. has been compared to other popular artists, such as Kendrick Lamar and Anderson .Paak. Do you think that his style is unique enough to forge a career that isn’t dependent on these comparisons?

• What aspect of his music (i.e. songwriting, hooks, production, song structure, etc.) would you like to see J.I.D work on for his next project?

• What’s your interpretation of the “cuckoo clock” interludes at the end of some of the songs? Do these bring the album together in some way or are they unnecessary?

• Who would you like to see collab with J.I.D in the future? Which artists would fit well with his style?

• Do you think that we will still be talking about J.I.D 5 years from now?

Thanks to everybody for reading this. I just want to say that I loved this album, and that nearly all of my favorite albums this year have come by surprise. If I hadn’t randomly clicked on the [FRESH] thread for this album when it came out, I probably wouldn’t be writing this right now, so I encourage you all to do the same, even when a post doesn’t have much attention.

Also, if you have a chance to see J.I.D and/or Earthgang live, don’t hesitate to do it. They put on an incredible show and they have ridiculous chemistry together. You won’t be let down, and you might as well get tickets while they’re cheap, because when these guys blow up it won’t be so easy to get that front row spot.

Artist: J.I.DAlbum: The Never StoryListen:YouTubeSpotifyApple MusicTidalYeezy SoundBackground by /u/ItsBigVanillaThe scene: East Atlanta, 1990. Halloween. A baby is born, kicking and screaming. His name: Destin Route. Destin is the youngest of seven brothers and sisters moving from low-income house to low-income house, by all means an ordinary black boy born in Atlanta. He’s a jittery kid; his grandma tells him so. He grows up around others like himself, he sees his peers sell drugs to feed their families, he knows his situation.Destin gets older, makes his way through his classes. High school ends and he keeps moving, gets accepted to Hampton University in Virginia, plays football. He’s in college now: a new chapter in his life, new experiences, new friends. New friends: Olu and Eian, a.k.a. Venus and Doc. They’re rappers, call themselves Earthgang. Destin’s interested. He remembers growing up, listening to Wu-Tang Clan, that New York shit, Outkast, of course, D’Angelo, too.2012: he gets kicked out of school. What’s next? He decides to focus on the music. Isn’t that what everybody does when they have nothing left to do? The difference is, Destin’s better than most. He writes a bit, records a bit, links up with Earthgang a bit, next thing he knows he’s got a mixtape: Route of Evil. He’s a rapper now, he starts calling himself J.I.D, as in, the jittery kid that grandma used to say he was. He likes it, he’s having fun with it, he keeps writing. 2013: mixtape number two, Para Tu, drops it right before his 23rd birthday.More songs with Earthgang, they form a collective: Spillage Village. Put out an album: Bears Like This. Things are heating up, they’re gaining traction, they get an offer: open up for Ab-Soul on his next tour. J.I.D jumps at the chance, gets out there on stage and raps his heart out. He’s getting the hang of this, now. Drops an EP, Dicaprio, and still keeps writing. Keeps putting out music: Bears Like This Too with Spillage Village. Keeps touring: this time he opens for Bas, who he worked with on the Ab-Soul tour. Keeps writing: Bears Like This Too Much is next. They even managed to get a J. Cole feature on this one.Cole hears his stuff; he likes it. This could be the next step for J.I.D. He gets the offer of a lifetime: Cole says sign with me. Drop your debut album on my label, Dreamville. This is his shot at legitimacy. This is his chance to see his music make an impact. He accepts the offer, of course. Who wouldn’t? Then he gets to work on The Never Story.Review by /u/ItsBigVanillaThe Never Story begins with a smooth chorus of voices, opening the album with the positive affirmation “Everyone’s a star / Every day’s the move / Everywhere you are is for you”. As the lines are repeated, another voice comes into play: a youthful, crooning, almost squeaky voice, a voice that doesn’t appear to foreshadow a rap album at all. A minute passes, the chorus stops, and in come the drums as listeners are eased into the first track, “General”. What’s immediately gripping about the track is the production (done by Latrell James & Oz theAdditive): it’s steady, layered, and thumping, glued together by a deep bass line and an atmosphere that suggests there’s danger around the corner. And like clockwork, the danger appears as J.I.D makes his entrance, spitting a head-bopper of a verse that manages to sound meticulously written and off-the-cuff at the same time. Rapping about life in Atlanta, racism, and his own experiences, the rapper comes across as honest and lyrical, qualities rare in such a catchy tune.Instead of risking overstaying its welcome, the track ends, transitioning into “Never”, which opens with a sinister, cloudy (Childish Major & Christo Welch) beat that would make Norf Norf proud. “Never been shit, never had shit / Never knew shit, never out, never do shit damn / But a nigga never gave two shits” raps J.I.D in one of the album’s catchiest hooks, sliding into another verse introspective enough to keep listeners thinking while they try to keep up with the flow, which sprawls and bounds around the production effortlessly, stopping and starting again at will, never feeling slightly off-base. The production stays exciting, constantly being ramped up or cut out at moments that perfectly accentuate J.I.D’s lyricism without overshadowing it, and halfway through the song, the entire track shifts gears with a completely unexpected beat switch. Suddenly, the track goes from misty to robotic, and J.I.D goes from introspective to braggadocious, coming in hot with perhaps one of the year’s best set of opening lines: “What you call a chick that don't suck dick? You don't/ And if you think you finna come up this, you won't/ Down comes the boogie and up jumps the funk/ This beat takin' a beating, I hand out the lumps.” From this point on, the track explodes with an energy as of yet unheard on the album.Following “Never” is “EdEddnEddy”, a mellow track that sees J.I.D utilizing his trademark lazy flow in a lazy way, floating along another beat that’s almost impossible not to move along to (produced by Hollywood JB). At this point in the tracklist, the album’s appeal is clear: fantastic production, well written and quotable lyrics, and a fresh new voice in hip-hop, proving he can tackle a wealth of styles and come out on top every time. “Me and my two niggas be like Ed Edd and Eddy”, he raps, and on the next track, “D/vision”, frequent collaborators Venus and Doc of Earthgang, the other “Eds”, make their appearance. “D/vision” features what may be the most impressive technical rap on the album, as the three MCs attempt to one-up each other over freestyle-inspiring J. Cole production.Next up are “Hereditary” and “All Bad”, two of the album’s mellowest moments. The triumphant, guitar-and-piano production (by Officials) of “Hereditary” paves the way for one of J.I.D’s most melodic performances, showcasing his ability to tread the line between rapping and singing, all while offering up a hook that’s sure to get stuck in listener’s heads. On “All Bad”, things slow down even further as J.I.D goes full R&B, accompanied by understated, soulful vocals from Mereba. Thanks to producer Hollywood JB, the song feels funky and sexy, at once reminiscent of Isaiah Rashad while managing not to sound too much like anybody else. The track is so downtempo that it almost threatens to bring the album to a complete halt, but it works as another interesting chapter in The Never Story.The atmosphere is quickly revitalized by “Underwear”, one of the album’s darkest-sounding affairs. J.I.D plays around on the hook, alliterating in a seemingly offhand way (“Melancholy cool / Matthew McConaughey / on a money mission”) and cracking the classic “underwear/under where” joke, the gold standard of elementary schools across the country. However, the trap-inspired, piano-laden production by Christo Welch gives way to a few energetic, instantly memorable verses that turn the track into one of the project’s highlights.Slipped in between two of the most single-worthy tracks is the Childish Major-produced “8701”, a short, punchy track that features a verse from fellow Atlanta artist 6LACK. While the track’s autotune-over-guitar and under two minute runtime make it feel a bit out of place and transitory, it still stands as a satisfying song in its own right. “8701” leads into “Hoodbooger”, another playful and vibrant song that feels like an upbeat counterpart to “Underwear”. The track, produced by 808 Blake, originally appeared on J.I.D’s Dicaprio EP, but it fits in perfectly here as yet another lyrically infectious moment full of charisma and swagger.Before the album’s end comes “Somebody”, a song that sounds like it would make surprisingly reasonable background music on Sesame Street. The positive vibes come in the form of Imaginary Kids production that sounds like sunshine and a hook that could give MF DOOM the warm-and-fuzzies (“Everybody gotta be something / Everybody wanna be something / … Everybody gotta love somebody”). J.I.D raps about his choice to make a name for himself in the rap game, and by the time his verses are up, you’re bound to feel like you want to give it a shot, too. While the song’s tone might seem out of place on the tail end of the album, it demonstrates just how diverse of an artist that J.I.D is, while providing some levity before the album’s final, definitive moment.The Never Story goes out with a bang, not a whimper, as the concluding track, “Lauder”, starts off with a braggadocious proclamation that feels well deserved at this point: “Okay I told motherfuckers I was sick as a bitch / The dopest dope you smoke gon’ get you a whiff / Watch how these niggas flip the script with the flick of they wrist / Southern lyricists don’t exist like my flow is a myth”. More J. Cole production creates a landscape for J.I.D’s most personal effort yet, spitting verses about his brother, (“My brother was locked up for shooting at the enemy / Caught one nigga then caught fifteen / I ain’t meet that nigga ‘till I was fifteen”), his ambitions, (“I silently swore solemnly / That I would be the guy to make my black people proud of me / Roses to the mothers of anybody that doubted me”), and his passion for rapping (“My pen carries my many sins / The irony the iron can’t straighten out any wrinkle in existence”). The track is a major highlight, perhaps even the best song on the album, and definitely the best way to end it.The album ends on a high note that, most importantly, feels earned. Running at 40 minutes, 11 tracks and an intro manage to come together to feel cohesive yet diverse, lyrical yet quotable, and to hint at what’s to come. J.I.D emerges victorious, a fresh new personality in the rap game, and a big personality at that. The project seeps with talent; whether it be from J.I.D, the guest artists, or the producers, everyone involved brings the heat and sets the stage for the start of a long, potentially brilliant career. As an album, The Never Story is fantastic; as a debut, it’s excellent.Favorite Lyrics by /u/ItsBigVanillaAlright, what you call a chick that don't suck dick? You don'tAnd if you think you finna come up this, you won'tDown comes the boogie and up jumps the funkThis beat takin' a beating, I hand out the lumps• “Never”I'm a stallion, stout, strong, war ready, resilientGuess the Lord put me in position just to kill niggasA warrior, but words used is my spear, my sword, my fear, my Lord, my chance is void if IDo it for myself and don't give back to the loyalThe unemployed, all my boys in hereOkay, let's really make some noise in here• “D/vision”Look like I gotta bust heads like bruh said nigga suspectAnd I don't play muhfuckin nut check, this a gut checkAfter I done killed y'all, imma hit your bitch up and have a slut festNo Morris Chestnut, bitch nut chestLeave the nigga in the past where the dust isThis a 100 round drum, nigga duck this• “Underwear”Yeah, too many hoes on my D-I-C-KI run the game like V-I-C-KYou ain't talking shit, no habla EnglaisI can cock that thing back and pon de replayI'ma be the man, and I know that you feel itFast-forward, in five years in LA in a BentleyI been a Renaissance, finna send a bombHit him in his arm, leg, head, nigga swam oceans for the commas• “Hoodbooger”Let's get it poppin', they're pulling pistols on apostle PaulSo paid the piper or meet the sniper legend of the fallI knew in diapers you and I was nothing alike at allI do or die, you do it to die, I'm really making callsYou couldn't kill it and take it out of meThe ideology, this the odysseyI'm Odysseus, you gotta follow meWatch how I maneuver, I influence the influencersThe flow is like the flu in influenza going through the motionSo I motivate all of my niggas, they tell me kill 'em with kindnessI'd rather kill 'em and they're other significants• “Lauder”Discussion Questions by /u/ItsBigVanilla• J.I.D. has been compared to other popular artists, such as Kendrick Lamar and Anderson .Paak. Do you think that his style is unique enough to forge a career that isn’t dependent on these comparisons?• What aspect of his music (i.e. songwriting, hooks, production, song structure, etc.) would you like to see J.I.D work on for his next project?• What’s your interpretation of the “cuckoo clock” interludes at the end of some of the songs? Do these bring the album together in some way or are they unnecessary?• Who would you like to see collab with J.I.D in the future? Which artists would fit well with his style?• Do you think that we will still be talking about J.I.D 5 years from now?Thanks to everybody for reading this. I just want to say that I loved this album, and that nearly all of my favorite albums this year have come by surprise. If I hadn’t randomly clicked on the [FRESH] thread for this album when it came out, I probably wouldn’t be writing this right now, so I encourage you all to do the same, even when a post doesn’t have much attention.Also, if you have a chance to see J.I.D and/or Earthgang live, don’t hesitate to do it. They put on an incredible show and they have ridiculous chemistry together. You won’t be let down, and you might as well get tickets while they’re cheap, because when these guys blow up it won’t be so easy to get that front row spot.