#i swear to god if i am the sole reason we pass our review i want a huge buyout

[imafraidoftomorrow]

Watch me single-handedly save my PA program from being shut down during our accreditation review this time next year

[mrsalwayswrite]

Hvítr gown, nýr life (Ubbe x Reader)

This is my contribution to @geekandbooknerd​ 2k followers challenge! Congrats again, my dear! 

My prompt was: "People aren't born good or bad. Maybe they're born with tendencies either way, but it's the way you live your life that matters." - Cassandra Clare, City of Glass. 

Couple notes for this fic- Bjorn & Torvi are still together because reasons. Italics mean speakers are using Old Norse. 

The title means ‘White Gown, New Life’ in Old Norse. 

Also, this is my first time writing Ubbe so.... hopefully its not OOC?

Words: 4800

Warnings: one or two swear words. implied sex. I think that’s it???

Tag List: @youbloodymadgenius​

"You cannot truly be considering this!" Bjorn thundered in the small, enclosed room. 

 Ubbe observed his elder brother- a man he had aspired to be like his whole childhood, a man he still looked up too, regardless of his faults. "Of course I am."

 Bjorn slammed his hand on the wooden table, making it shake, as his voice shook like thunder in the room. "You are throwing your future away!"

 "I am protecting our future!" Ubbe snapped, finally rising to his feet, irritation leaking into his tone. He met Bjorn's incensed blue eyes with his own resolute gaze. "We need allies, alliances, everything to make father's dream come true. If this is the price I must pay to fulfill Ragnar's dream, then I will gladly do it. It is not about me. It's for our people."

 After a long, tense moment, Lagertha pushed off the wall she and Torvi were leaning against. Gliding closer, she moved to stand in front of Ubbe, tears swimming in her eyes. Gently, she cupped his cheeks. "Your father would be so proud of you, Ubbe. I pray the gods bless you with happiness in this."

 "Thank you, Lagertha." Relief swelled in Ubbe's chest. If he had Lagertha's support, he knew Bjorn would come around. 

 Since they fled Kattegat and came to England, he had watched the shieldmaiden age before his eyes. He could not help but wonder if her soul yearned for Valhalla and to be reunited with Ragnar. Not that he could blame her. To hear her speak of Ragnar and his approval of Ubbe's actions, it only further solidified his choice. 

 Torvi spoke up, surprising him.  "I think Ubbe should do it." When Bjorn opened his mouth to interject, she snapped her gaze over to her husband. "This is his decision, Ubbe. He has asked for our advice but it is up to him. We need security and this, though we don't trust them, this can provide that security."

 Bjorn huffed, crossing his arms over his chest. "Fine! Do what you want!" 

 "Thank you." Ubbe softly said, looking at all the family he had left in this world. "I'll go inform King Alfred now." 

 With a firm stride, he left the quarters they had been given in Wessex. After some time trying to locate the young king, a passing servant was able to tell him Alfred's location. Thankfully the king was in his private study, reviewing petitions from the worker's guild. The guards at the door allowed Ubbe entrance only after the king called out to allow him entrance. With a look of unrestrained animosity, almost begging him to give them a reason to throw him out, the guards opened the door for him to pass. Ubbe nodded his thanks, but never removed his hand from the sword at his side until the door closed behind him. 

 Straightening in his chair, Alfred looked up from the papers spread out over his desk. "Good afternoon, Ubbe. I suspect you have sought me out because you have an answer for my proposition."

 "I do, your highness." Ubbe paused, knowing how his life was going to irrevocably change once he answered. "And I will accept. I will take a Saxon wife to further the alliance between us."

 "I am greatly pleased by your decision." The dark-haired man pushed away from his desk. He moved to a nearby table to pour them both a cup of wine, something these Saxons seemed to favor, as he continued speaking. "Alliances must be built on trust and understanding. A political marriage certainly helps solidify that trust."

 Ubbe received the cup, missing the taste of ale from his homeland. After taking a small sip, he stared at Alfred. "So what do we do now? Do I meet some potentials or is there a matchmaker?"

 "No, I already have someone picked out for you. My cousin." Alfred answered without hesitation before pausing in contemplation. "What your father and my grandfather would think of this arrangement….our families tied by blood."

 "Yeah…. What is her name?"

 "My cousin? Lady Y/N. Fear not, she comes from a well-respected family and with a substantial dowry. She has spent most of her life at a nunnery, so there is no fear of her virtue being tainted."

 "Great." Ubbe sighed out. Though he knew Alfred meant all that to be reassuring….it felt anything but. 

 *****

 It was not until almost a month later, Ubbe met his intended bride; with the wedding set for three days after her arrival. Apparently King Alfred and some of the Saxon noblemen were keen on the arranged marriage happening as soon as possible. 

 Ubbe stood off to the side in the throne room. With his hair freshly braided and pulled back and wearing one of his nicer tunics, he hoped he appeared princely. Even if by Saxon standards, he knew he fell woefully short. Lagertha had given him a nod of approval as they waited in the throne room. Though outwardly he kept his face passive and calm, his insides twisted into knots and his hands were clammy. 

 "Are you still certain about this, brother?" Bjorn clapped Ubbe on the shoulder as he whispered, eyeing the Saxons standing around. 

 The flaxen-haired Viking glanced over at King Alfred, who sat on his throne, talking in hushed tones to one of his advisors while his mother looked on with a sour expression. 

 Ubbe answered solemnly. "Aye, we need this alliance."

 With a grunt, Bjorn removed his hand but stayed at his brother's side. Something Ubbe appreciated. Although Bjorn had no issue airing his thoughts on this foolish alliance and how Ubbe was making a mistake in regards to choosing a wife again, he kept his complaints behind closed doors. In front of the Saxons, they presented an united front. 

 The large doors to the throne room opened with a groan. All eyes turned to witness as a sole figure cautiously yet gracefully walked forward, head held high and hands clasped in front of her. 

 "Cousin!" King Alfred exclaimed, rising from his throne, arms spread wide. Immediately, he descended the few stairs with a fond smile on his face. "Your presence has been missed here at court."

 The woman dipped into an elegant curtsey, her dress gliding around her like water. "You are far too kind, my king."

 As King Alfred embraced his cousin in a warm hug, Ubbe could only stare in shock. Standing there in a deep red gown, the woman looked like a goddess. Ubbe had prepared himself mentally for his intended bride to be marginally pretty like most of these Saxon women, but someone he easily overlooked. Not her though. Without even saying a word to him, he felt beguiled by her. It was more than just her physical beauty, it was in the way she carried herself, with grace and a nobility. It reminded him distantly of his mother. A woman who knew her place and dignity. This woman, his intended bride, was truly stunning. He could not help but wonder if the true reason for her prolonged residence at a nunnery was not because of piety but to preserve and protect her. Something he was suddenly immensely grateful for. 

 "This is your betrothed." Alfred walked her over to where the Vikings stood, at the bottom of the steps leading to his throne. With a pleased smile on his face, he introduced the two. "Ubbe, son of Ragnar Lothbrok, this is my cousin, Lady Y/N." 

 She curtsied to him, her movements so graceful like they were part of a dance. When she spoke, he was further enchanted, for even her voice was beautiful. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Lord Ubbe."

 "It's just Ubbe. Since we are to be married, we can skip the formalities."

 A coy smile played on her lips. "As you wish….Ubbe."

 "Excellent." King Alfred beamed. "Perhaps a walk in the gardens to better acquaint yourselves would be desirable?"

 Before Ubbe could whole-heartedly agree, wishing to learn more about his intended bride, a sickly-sweet voice interrupted. 

 "Y/N has only just arrived. We have wedding plans to finalize and she must try on her dress." Princess Judith interrupted, wrapping an arm through her niece's while pointedly ignoring the Vikings. "Maybe another time, but I am sure y/n will be quite busy with preparations. Come, my dear."

 With that, she swept her niece out of the throne room as if the Vikings had the plague and she refused to breathe the same air as them. But before y/n disappeared, she peeked over her shoulder and met Ubbe's gaze with a tender smile teasing her lips, then disappeared from view. 

 "There is much to finalize and my mother wants to ensure the wedding will go smoothly. You and y/n will have time after the wedding to become acquainted." Alfred said, studying the direction his mother and cousin vanished. With a sigh, he pulled his gaze back to Ubbe. "Now that introductions are made, I have matters with the clergy to attend to."

 Ubbe barely paid attention when Alfred walked away, returning to his throne and listening to some priests whine about something petty. 

 A bump of a shoulder against his own drew Ubbe's attention back from thinking about y/n. 

 Bjorn leaned over to whisper conspiracingly in his ear. "Well, at least you won't have a problem bedding her." 

 *****

 The wedding ceremony was outlandish and dragged on for entirely too long. Between the many prayers of the priests and the rigid formality of everything, Ubbe was ready to draw his sword and spill some Christian blood, just to break up the monotony. Even Lagertha appeared ready to fall asleep from where she stood. 

 The only aspect that kept his attention was his bride. Watching her walk down the aisle, he almost swallowed his tongue, leaving him gaping at her in a slack-jawed awe as she slowly approached. In her flowing wedding dress, a crown of flowers in her hair and eyes alight, she appeared ethereal. Standing in his nicest tunic and pants, he knew he paled in comparison to her, but he did not mind. 

 When the priests tried to forcefully convince Ubbe to dress in Saxon clothing for the wedding, he not-so-subtly threatened to decapitate them if they mentioned it once more. He was a Viking and would dress as such. Besides this was to be a physical representation of an alliance between Saxon and Viking, it would make no sense for him to dress as a Saxon. 

 Thankfully Alfred agreed with his thoughts, so the clergy kept any further comments to themselves. 

 Once the wedding concluded with Ubbe and y/n proclaimed man and wife, the couple was escorted to the celebration. The following feast was beyond lavish, with drink and food in overflowing abundance. To his dismay, Ubbe found himself unable to converse with his new bride. Either Alfred was introducing him to someone new, some nobleman pestered him with questions or worst of all, Judith purposefully continued to make excuses that pulled y/n away. When their eyes met, he could see the apology in them, which lightened the stone in his heart. 

 As the feast progressed, Ubbe found as more time passed, the more his gaze drifted to his bride. The gods had truly blessed him with this marriage. Watching her, he was captivated. Although, he found his hand frequently shifting to reach for the hilt of his sword no longer strapped to his side. All the appreciative or lustful looks she received from other men did not go unnoticed, and if one of them tried to lay a hand on his new wife, he would not be held accountable for his actions. His fists could be just as deadly as any weapon.

 Finally, the time was called for the bedding ceremony. 

 Alfred and some of the clergy explained to Ubbe what happened during a bedding ceremony when he was learning about the wedding's customs and the vows he would have to recite. To say the Ragnarsson was shocked was an understatement. It sounded barbaric…. and him and his people were called the heathens. But he understood the need to maintain protocol for building the alliance and the trust of the Saxons. 

 So that was how he found himself walking down a corridor with Bjorn at his side, while the feast and celebrations continued on without him. 

 "Are you sure about this?" 

 Ubbe rolled his eyes at his elder brother, his stride never faltering. "You did not have to agree to it."

 Bjorn scoffed, keeping pace. "And miss out on all the fun?"

 The two brothers laughed, the sound loosening some of the tension in the bridegroom's body. When Alfred told Ubbe he needed a witness to represent his people at the bedding ceremony, Bjorn was the only option. When Ubbe initially told his brother about the tradition and asked for Bjorn's presence, the hulking Viking had doubled-over in laughter, followed by making several crude comments about the need to instruct Ubbe on how to properly bed a woman. The discussion ended in a brotherly tussel but Bjorn agreed. 

 Especially when Ubbe explained his plan. 

 The bedroom was in the wing of the royal families' rooms. Since y/n was related by blood, she was given a room there whenever she came to visit and naturally, this meant it was where the marriage would be consummated. Several candles were lit but the bedroom was kept dim to give an illusion of privacy. A quick glance at the bed made Ubbe raise an eyebrow at the generous size and the curtains draped around it. A fire burned in the fireplace providing warmth in the bedroom, a sharp contrast to the stern, cold faces of the clergy who waited. 

 The bishop who married them stood off to the side with two other clergy, all in their robes and barely suppressed looks of disgust on the priests' faces. Two female attendees fussed over y/n, clearly everyone waiting for Ubbe and Bjorn. Once again, Ubbe had to force himself to keep his eyes from staying glued to his new wife. She stood there in a thick robe, with her hair falling about her shoulders loosely, free from the bridal veil. Her gaze jumped from Ubbe to the clergy and back as she nibbled on her bottom lip, clearly nervous about what was to occur next. Cheekily, he sent her a quick wink, hoping that would help settle her nerves. If the blush that grew on her cheeks said anything, at least she was not repulsed by him. 

 The bishop stepped forward. "Are you prepared to consummate your marriage to Lady Y/N before God and man?"

 "I am." Ubbe defiantly met the man's eyes. 

 "Then by the power given to me by the Holy Church, let the two become one in the sight of God and these witnesses and the marriage shall be complete." With that, the man drew their strange cross sign in the air and stepped back to rejoin his fellow clergy. 

 The two attendees helped y/n out of her heavy robe, revealing a thin, white nightgown that seemed to only enhance her beauty and innocence. Desire thrummed in his blood at the sight of her, but Ubbe ignored the sensation for the moment. The heavy robe was laid on a nearby chair and the two women left the room with a quick curtsy, leaving only the men and y/n. 

 After a shared look with Bjorn, Ubbe walked over to his new bride, keeping his movements slow so as to not startle her. Her hands were clasped before her, but even as he approached, he could see the faint tremble in them. Her gaze never strayed from the floor. The confidence seen previously in her seemed to have melted away into anxiety, making him think of a skittish colt. He could not help but wonder what changed, if it was due to him or what was supposed to occur between them. 

 Standing before her, he gently reached out to take her soft hands in his own larger, calloused ones, pleased when she did not flinch at his touch. Although her gaze remained downward. 

 "Are you alright?" He whispered, aware of the four pairs of eyes watching their every move. 

 "Of….of course, my lord husband."

 "Remember, I told you to call me by my name."

 That caused her head to snap up and meet his gaze. Now he could see the tears welling up in her eyes and her swollen bottom lip from constantly worrying it. 

 "It'll be alright." He tugged her bottom lip from between her teeth. The way her breath hitched at the intimate touch made his heart pound. He gave her hands in his, a quick squeeze. "Trust me, yeah?"

 After a moment, she gave a faint nod, still eyeing him warily but appearing less like she wanted to flee, mutely squeezing his hands back.

 A voice broke the stillness in the room, immediately causing her to tense again. 

 "The two of you must proceed to the bed to finalize the union. We do not have all night to wait for confirmation of her virginity and consummation." One of the priests drawled with an apparent undertone of disdain. 

 "Then it is a good thing you don't have to wait any longer." Ubbe retorted, narrowing his eyes at the priest. The man huffed but a quiet rebuke from the bishop had the priest pressing his lips together. With one final, assessing scan, the flaxen-haired Viking shifted, pulling his new bride into his side and wrapping an arm around her waist. He felt her tense against him but ignored it to stare at the three clergy with a mocking smirk. "Bjorn."

 At the sound of his name, his brother moved from leaning against the doorframe. A scowl on his face, and with the shadows cast over him, made him appear more looming and menacing. "Everybody out."

 The three clergy looked back and forth between the two Viking brothers, clearly confused and intimidated. 

 "You can't….we must witness…."

 "I SAID EVERYBODY OUT!" Bjorn roared, pulling the axe from his side and waving it in the air. "OR DO I NEED TO SPLIT YOUR SKULL TO HELP MY WORDS REACH YOUR TINY BRAINS?!"

 The three scrambled, eyes wide in terror, tripping over their long robes in a pathetic attempt to reach the door faster. The bishop turned around, hands grasping the golden cross hanging from his neck. "King….King Alfred will hear of this." He stuttered out in feigned confidence. 

 A deafening war cry from Bjorn practically shook the room in answer. That was enough to silence the bishop and have him flee, following his companions.

 At Bjorn's roar, y/n began shaking like a leaf, her hands tightly holding onto Ubbe's arm wrapped around her. He further pulled her against him, providing shelter from his brother's fury. Even as the room fell back into silence, he could still feel her trembling in his arms. He prayed to the gods that this did not darken her view of him and cause her to fear him. 

 Once the room cleared and the pounding footfalls of the clergy could no longer be heard, Bjorn turned around with a grin, scratching the back of his neck with his axe. "You know Alfred will be upset when he finds out." 

 Ubbe smirked. "We can't let him have everything he wants, yeah?"

 That made Bjorn chuckle. "I'll go guard the door." He pointed his axe at Ubbe, still grinning. "You owe me for this."

 "Scaring priests shitless isn't enough for you?"

 Bjorn scoffed. "I can do that whenever I like."

 "We'll name our firstborn after you."

 Bjorn waved him off, opening the wooden door and stepping out. When the door closed, the echoing sound seemed to fill the empty space in the room. 

 Ubbe peeked down at the woman in his arms. "Are you alright?"

 "Your brother….is….frightening."

 "Aye, don't tell him that though. It would only inflate his ego more."

 Once he was certain she was steady on her feet and would not faint, he pressed a chaste kiss to the side of her head before striding away to the other side of the bedroom. Quickly he pulled off his tunic and boots, tossing them onto a nearby chair and then flopped onto the massive bed in only his pants. If nothing else could be said for tonight, he knew he would sleep well. The bed was comfortable, even rivaling his own bed back in Kattegat. With a pleased groan, he tucked an arm under his head and settled under the covers. A wave of exhaustion crashed over him, his eyelids sliding closed.  Even though he felt like he spent most of the day standing around and kneeling for the wedding, it was still tedious and draining. Thank the gods it was over. 

 "Um, my lord…." 

 "Ubbe." He interrupted, lips twitching in amusement. "Or husband. Whichever you prefer."

 "Ah, Ubbe….are we not….?" Her hesitant voice trailed off, but the unspoken question lingered in the air. 

 He snorted. "I have no plans to force myself upon you just to appease your priests and bishop."

 "But we must consummate the marriage."

 "I will only have sex with you if you desire me as your husband and not just to fulfill an obligation."

 The following, prolonged silence caused him to open his eyes and look over at his new wife. It was apparent she had not moved from where he left her. He expected to see fear on her lovely face or revulsion at the idea of her ever willingly wanting him to touch her. Instead, she seemed to be studying him with a mixture of curiosity and respect. That confident woman he had previously met, making a reappearance. 

 After holding her gaze for a moment, he patted the bed next to him. "Come lay down. I doubt standing there all night will be pleasant."

 With a soft smile, she stepped over and crawled under the covers, but maintained an arm’s length distance between them. They both laid on their backs, together yet alone. The only sounds were of the crackling fire and their breathing. 

 Before he realized it, Ubbe found himself speaking, filling the silence with his babbling but strangely felt he needed to share these thoughts with the woman beside him, the woman whose life was now tied to him, whether she wanted it to be or not. 

 "I doubt this is the marriage you were dreaming of as a little girl. Probably expected some prince or lord….not a Viking. Your people only see us as heathens, as barbaric devils, at least that's what one of the noblemen said. That we cannot stop the evil and destruction we cause because we are possessed." He snorted, rubbing a hand down his face. After a deep breath, he turned his head to look at her, amazed to find her already watching him. His tone softened as he continued. "I'm sorry you were forced into this marriage. I know it might not mean much to you but I vow I won't ever physically harm you or force myself upon you. After all the wedding ceremonies, you can return to the nunnery if that is what you want."

 Her eyes widened momentarily, then drifted away as she worried her lip once again. As he waited for her to speak, his gaze traveled over her face, taking in the small details that until now he had not been able to observe. It would be a blatant lie to say he did not desire to lie with her, to touch and taste her. The current state of his manhood was evidence enough of how simply gazing at her beauty affected him. He made a vow to her. If nothing else, he hoped they could be friendly to one another. 

 To his shock, she rolled onto her side, facing him completely, hands tucked under her cheek. Without hesitation, he mirrored her action, but kept his head cradled on his arm. 

 "I have not traveled much," she quietly said, almost shyly, "but there is one thing I've learned through my studies and the observation of others. People aren't born good or bad. Maybe they're born with tendencies either way, but it's the way you live your life that matters." She paused as if choosing her next words carefully. "I do not think you are a barbaric devil or….or possessed. I think…."

 "What?"

 "I think you are very brave and strong. Not many would seek an alliance with those that fervently claim them as an enemy….nor be kind to a simple noblewoman."

 He smirked, finding himself charmed by her honesty. Carefully, he reached over and brushed a thumb over her cheek. "You are no simple noblewoman, my lady."

 "If you are just Ubbe, then I request you call me, y/n."

 An unexpected, loud banging on the door startled them both. Y/n gasped and rushed to sit up against the headboard, eyes wide with fright. Ubbe immediately pushed himself up, making sure to put himself between his wife and the door, unsheathing a dagger he had subtly slipped under his pillow. 

 "Are you two done yet? Some ugly priest out here wants to know!" Bjorn shouted through the door. 

 Ubbe groaned, putting the dagger away, before calling back. "No! This woman is insatiable! Tell the priest to come back in the morning! Hopefully I can still walk!"

 A harsh bark of laughter preceded loud arguing, which could be heard through the door. Raised voices crept underneath the door frame, the loudest being that of Bjorn. Ubbe stayed perched on the bed, to assist his brother if the need called for it. No matter what Alfred or those whiny clergy ordered, no one would be witnessing any consummation of his. Ever. Eventually, the voices dwindled like a dying flame until only silence could be heard from outside. Ubbe figured Bjorn must have won the argument, or used enough threats of bodily harm, since no one entered the bedroom. 

 The dagger returned to its sheath under his pillow. A habit he had since childhood. A glance to his side showed his wife still shifted as far away from the door as possible, hands clutching the sheets in a tight grip. He reached a hand out to her. "It's alright. Bjorn won't let anyone in."

 She took his hand, still eyeing the door warily. "What did you say to him?"

 "Ah, nothing important. Just to keep the priests away."

 "Ok."

 "We should go to sleep. Today has been long." He stated after he coaxed her back under the covers and no longer sent glances towards the door. Only after she was settled did he relax. Laying on his back, an arm behind his head, his eyes closed almost instantly. He could hear her shuffling occasionally but he paid it no mind. Sleep slinked into his mind, hovering on the edges. 

 "Ubbe…." A barely-heard whisper pulled him from the brink of sleep. 

 "Yes?"

 "What if….what if I want to."

 "Mmmm?"

 "Um, fulfill our marital duties."

 Well, that got his attention. He turned his head to the side, noting how her gaze traced over his bare chest slowly then lifted to meet his gaze. "Are you asking me to have sex with you?"

 "Yes." She bit her bottom lip, even as her eyes never strayed from him.

 "Are you sure?"

 She nodded. 

 "Hmmm….well, I may be convinced but….you have to kiss me first."

 Cautiously yet deliberately, she scooted closer until they lay side by side. In a graceful movement, she leaned over and pressed her lips to his in an innocent, chaste kiss. Her lips were softer than even the pillow beneath him and by the gods, she was going to be his undoing. After a moment, she leaned back, gazing down at him with a nervous yet endearing smile. Before he could say anything, to encourage or instruct, her lips descended on his once again, but this time hungrily. His initial surprise transitioned to a carnal satisfaction when a soft moan slipped out of her after he tugged on her bottom lip. Their mouths connected with a needy kiss, sending a jolt of electricity through him. All thoughts of sleep forgotten. 

 Suddenly, he flipped them over, pinning her underneath him, taking charge of their love-making. She giggled at the abrupt action but that was quickly silenced by his mouth crashing against hers and thrusting his tongue into her mouth. 

 As she kissed him back passionately, he wondered if maybe this marriage was not such a bad idea. If the way her lips eagerly sought his, her hands gripped onto biceps as if to keep her steady, her back arched as he trailed open-mouth kisses down her neck….maybe the marriage could be more than just political. 

 Soon enough, all thoughts vanished from his mind that were not related in regards to exploring the exquisite body of his Saxon wife and listening to her moan his name repeatedly. 

[sole-cuore-amore-e-droga]

Italy brings the rock’n’roll youth of tomorrow to Rotterdam 2021

It’s the final day of doing my yet again botched attempt at a review series and I’ve been dying to post my gigantic write-up for my newly beloved Italy, at the top of the bookies, darling of all hearts, ready to rock Eurovision, and even more! Vai vai~

ARTIST & ENTRY INFO

Representing them this year is Måneskin, a band made up of four - singer and possibly the hottest motherfucker to grace the planet Earth Damiano, guitarist Thomas, drummer Ethan, and the cherry on top - bassist Victoria, whose half-Danish heritage is the reason Måneskin is called Måneskin (= Moonshine). They thought of this name at a “battle of the bands” that they won, thinking they might as well change it to something different, but in the end... say it with me now

They have known each other since highschool, made a band in 2016, won the “battle of the bands”, started out making a living as buskers in the streets of Rome, from which they gradually grew through playing small gigs, and later tried out for X Factor Italia season 11, on which they came 2nd.

They went on to release an EP titled after their debut single of the name of the song above, including some of their X Factor covers, and later on got to get big through releasing an album, getting it certified all kinds of goodnesses, having singles from that album be popular, even releasing a documentary of themselves... they’ve done so much in life and they’re only 20-22 years old... aw man, the life is just ahead of them, for them to be so young and win Sanremo on their first try. (And I’ve always wanted them for Eurovision ever since I was aware of their existence, because their music is very nice, and they just feel like charming human beings. So imagine my joy seeing them announced for Sanremo 2021? And them WINNING months later??? man what kind of luck do I have even if just for a year lmao <333)

“Zitti e buoni”, the last song title alphabetically this year, is purely of the band’s making, and the lyrics are talking about not abiding the rules in general, how they’re out of their minds but they’re not like “them”, and how people talk but don’t know what they’re talking at all.

REVIEW

IT’S A PRETTY CRAZY GOOD ROCK SONG AMEN HALLELUJAH OPRAH WOOOOOOO

wbk I love it. Yeah sure it might be composited of something that sounds like standard rock riffs and what not, but it’s the ENERGY that goes into it that gets me more excited for this than for Finland, a fellow rock song of this year’s final.

Damiano’s vocals have the specific kind of rockstar tinge to them, and they’re very complimenting to the song. The way he says everything is beautiful, the “e buonasera signore e signori” line in particular is just a moment that shows the beginning of power somehow, I don’t know. The chorus is great, eventhough it’s just one line repeated but it changes the pronoun each time (going from “I’m out of my mind” to “you’re out of your mind” to “we’re out of my mind”) - MAGICAL.

And the bridge. YES, the bridge. Along with the outro it’s the best part of the song. The chord progression. The lines repeated on that bridge. The emotions going on. The delivery of the lines of the emotion. It’s a convincing little bridge, to the point that it sounds just as great with violins! Wish they brought one, because according to Love Love Peace Peace, nothing screams winner quite like a violin.

God damn to the Måneskinsters pump this song up to the maximum. It was originally a ballad song, and I think that’s for the better for them to present it as a rock song, because a Sanremo ballad in a pool of Sanremo ballads... unless it stands out according to demoscopic & press juries, and there seems to be a no better option at hand that could make them stand out other than just sending a classy ballad, it just fizzles out in a spectacularly lame fashion. Måneskin’s one real shot through was with a song that would make them stand out, and they did it, and they’re here.

Everyone has put in their work, their passion, their skills into this, and it shows off in spades. Måneskin themselves are fantastic and chill human beings, who too, just like Flo Rida, get to enjoy how crazy amazing Eurovision experience is. And for that I salute them with my whole heart. Whatever they do tonight on Eurovision, they’ll leave a lasting mark in it. And for a good reason.

Also an Italian Eurovision edit that doesn’t suck, once again, yay! (In their defense, they didn’t have a whole lot to work with, so they released theirs early - just a few trimmings here and there, and a lyric change so that they skate by EBU easier with their anti-swearing policies. Gahddamn swearing~)

Approval factor: FUCK YES Follow-up factor: The funny thing about this is that last year their entry is about making noise but the song was a love ballad, this year it’s a song titled “shut up and behave” while dressed in a loudest motherfucking musical setting lol. Fuck the rules! It was solely on the Sanremo’s last year’s winner Diodato not to send an entry he thought that would fit for Sanremo, and that’s good on him - he can return next year replenished as all hell, and maybe aim for the trophy again? wishful thinking? aaaa. Anyway on a personal scale “Zitti e buoni” is a marvelous follow-up from “Fai rumore”, even if skipping 2020 entirely, especially after “Soldi”, which was already a fab follow-up after “Non mi avete fatto niente”, and even from “Occidentali’s Karma” on. And so it is subjectively a good follow-up. Italy SLAYS. AQ factor: As I write this, the odds are very much in their favour, if not a little bit too persuaded over the fact that Måneskin gave a good rock performance and knew what they would be doing, or it’s just that the Italians like overbetting for their acts way too damn much. But nevertheless, I just wanna hope for them to break the expectations people set on rock songs in Eurovision and SMASH themselves a victory. Or a top 2. Or a top 5-10. Anything will do, goddamn.

NF CORNER

Well, I promised that I will talk about Sanremo in a NF corner, because this is the first year I actually cared to watch it myself, unlike when I would’ve sided with someone whose reviewing style I love in not caring to watch it, and usually just check all the songs on the last day lol.

One thing about Sanremo that I sorely underestimate is that a handful of artists on there can come across as very versatile, and the one song you loved of one genre they presented several years ago, can be completely different and leave you baffled for days if you’re not very familiarized with their discography and the Italian music scene in general. Which now I’m going to pay an extreme amount of attention towards following Sanremo 2022 on out because hot damn did I never see gems like Willie Peyote coming!

Did I call him a gem over his entry? Yes, somehow. Am I even sure if I’m being serious?

I think I can somewhat agree when I say that for the international fam watching Sanremo at least, “Mai dire mai (La locura)” was a major expectation destroyer, at least for the crowd whose main lookouts in a lineup like this years were Ermal Meta, Annalisa, Arisa, etc. You know they’re gonna bring a ballad, and their ballads are usually decent, but what about the unexpected? That’s where a handful of acts, including Willie, comes in for me. The bass hooks in the second the song starts. The beat is minimalistic but strong enough to slap. The steady rap flow is mesmerizing, paired with that somewhat specifically Italian(?) vocal timbre. The chorus is greatly catchy, and it is a sung chorus, with this song still being largely a rap song. The electric-esque guitar soundwaves interspersed throughout the song are magnificent and magical, and on the chorus they even make a constant melody riff that repeats and may get annoying on multiple listens, but I still adore them. I really love the bridge as well and all that goes into it. A fantastic surprise of the season for me personally.

Now I figure that the lyrics may hinder the enjoyment for some, especially the points raised in some lines that may seem questionable and shady (if this went to Eurovision and got a “twerking” comment on Youtube, I will not be surprised if the description of choice is “patriarchic twerking”), but am I supposed to be fully offended at some points of it if I’m not its target audience, although I see some of what I do nowadays in those lines? “Mai dire mai” is probably dedicated to the Italian media and the Italian trends and what not. I’m not even disappointed it didn’t win, because if it went to Eurovision, it would’ve likely been met like a lesser “Occidentali’s Karma” - catchy song with lyrics that fly over listener’s heads which might as well be very accidentally mocking how we live our lives.

“Mai dire mai” has just less of a memorability-in-history value and no memorable gimmicks (Francesco had a gorilla, what is it visually going for on Willie’s performance?), besides, it would’ve suffered even WORSE post-Eurovision-edit than OK has - a lot of the bits and bobs that pass me by but when I notice them they make a really great entry, but other than the (presumably copyrighted) removal of a sample from a TV series (spoken by a fish character, nonetheless), what else is there to remove???? With Eurovision’s rules specifying that brands (Spotify, TikTok) and swearwords (lots of the good old Italian ones that Italian radios would digitally scratch out to emphasize that there were a LOT in the second verse) can’t be sung live, the song loses some of its lyrical charm. And you can’t just go around the song like Francesco Gabbani chopping off entire verses full of content full of witty lyrics and a reference to Chanel in order to present the more lyrically singable-along-to lines and not let go of the long chorus to whom his gorilla can dance to. “Mai dire mai” is RIFE with lyrics, that’s what a rap song is. It would have absolutely fallen apart.

Also no one paged it as a potential Eurovision winner during Sanremo, at least seriously, and it doesn’t have much that would have clicked with the future Eurovision generation and contestants when they would be asked to name their favourite Eurovision song of all times. In a world where from Italy they really like “Grande amore” and “Soldi” and even sometimes could name “Occidentali’s Karma”, is there really a place for “Mai dire mai (La locura)” over “Zitti e buoni”? Who would be naming that song as their favourite of all time? If you raised a hand, you lie to yourself, because that would’ve been me.

Now I don’t know how many of the Tumblr fam would draw ire at me putting out paragraphs worth of me being ultra positive towards this song, because as I’ve learned, there’s an ironic and unironic audience for Mr. Peyote on Tumblr especially, but for me I guess it was pretty worthy, also a thing I was finally able to yell off my chest since, and now I finally said it, I will continue streaming “Mai dire mai (La locura)” in peace.

He might’ve not won Sanremo, but his song won the equally important Mia Martini Critics Award, and also, my heart. Rest in broken shards of the Boris aquarium, my sweet cynical prince~

Måneskin were my 2nd after him so I’m equally happy they won. But what about my other favourites?

• Extraliscio ft. Davide Toffolo - Bianca luce nera A diluted version of the liscio genre, still makes for a very fascinatingly catchy and swaying song with lots of great instruments that are violins and a clarinet. What I figure is kinda a love song. Their performances were also great, with lots of dancers on stage and a genuinely great fun to be had, and you may remember them more after their performance in cover night, which was titled “Rosamunda”. They were the ones with their main singer’s guitar spinning for whatever reason that was there to make their song catchy, I guess.

• Lo Stato Sociale - Combat Pop A little bit of a far cry from their glory heydays with 2nd place in Sanremo 2018, but they returned with an equally banging song and an amazing set of performance chaos they brought in each and every time - dedicating their first night’s one to making a performance to not forget (and being the ones of two to reference the great Bugo&Morgan incident from last year, the other being Willie Peyote), the second competitive one was for referencing politics, and so on.

• Colapesce & Dimartino - Musica leggerissima Sweet melancholic song with the shades of Sebastien Tellier kinda sound, this song may seem jolly at first, but the especially melancholic undertones denote that there’s something else going on. It’s actually about depression, as that’s what the term “musica leggerissima” (very light music) means. But it still found a heart in Italian listeners and the Italian world finally woke up to how great Antonio Di Martino and Lorenzo “Colapesce” Urciullo are, and a handful of viewers were slightly heartbroken to see it not place in the superfinal top 3. Who knows if they would’ve actually won over Måneskin. I just know that their rollerskater girlie is so damn fine~

Bugo has also returned but I think his redemption arc started off the wrong foot, as his return entry, “E invece si”, was a bloated showtune ballad and got obnoxious to listen to at part. I declared to myself that night when I first heard the new entry that regarding on what made “Sincero” great, I side with Morgan.

And a special shout out to Ghemon, whose 2019 song was more than just a “purple rose” unlike I noted on a last proper Italian entry review. I don’t know what expectations I had for him, but I certainly wanted to love “Momento perfetto” more at the first listen, which was also somewhat of a show-tuney piece, but with a bit more funk and pizzazz, also Ghemon was VERY much vibing with his song, and that made me feel great for the few other performances of it that I saw the following days. It’s definitely a grower song, and around 2 months after Sanremo I fell into a bit of a rabbit-hole of his earlier music discovering, and I may be a bit exaggerating but, give Ghemon a bit more of acknowledgement and a stellar enough song, and with a little bit of magic touch, I can maybe see him lifting the Golden Lion trophy one day. Don’t ask why. (also lovely music video for his 2021 entry, which replaces continuous spinning in an aesthetic area to everybody moving their body in a diner (hopefully with everyone in the MV tested and been negative for long enough for the MV to actually happen).)

NF CORNER (NON-COMPETITIVE)

There’s so much needed to be discussed about there. So I’ll restrict myself to the moments that I remember and cherish:

• Rosario Fiorello. Just. Him.

• And the gentleman next to him, Achille Lauro.

tw // body piercing

Belarus 2018 could never

Fiorello and Lauro are perfect matches to each other’s worlds of imagination, and I was more than ever glad to see so much creativity coming from each one of them, a host and a nightly interval act respectively.

• Once again, “Rosamunda Medley” by Extraliscio, I didn’t watch the cover night in its entirety but I think it’s good enough of a medley if it got a 3rd place from the cover night from the orchestra!

• Sanremo Newcomers section of this year. I liked or vibed to almost every song out of the 8, and I’m decently happy with the winner, but if there’s one big shoutout I really want to make, is to “Regina” by Davide Shorty, for it’s such a cozy funky little love song that always makes me happy when I hear it. My personal winner preference, but I don’t mind Davide getting 2nd! For as long as he gets to place 1st in a future main Sanremo event hihihihihi

• Diodato proving himself to be a dance king at the beginning of his “Che vita meravigliosa” performance, my good Twitter friend made a bunch of videos where he dances to a lot of songs, as per request, check them out and you won’t forget it.

• Since Sanremo 2021 got rid of the audience as per COVID regulations and much to Amadeus’s dread, there ended up quite a handful of audience related memes. Such as the penis balloon et al.

• Remember when Sanremo 2021 audience was supposed to be whisked away in a cruise ship for safety measures? Pepperidge Farm remembers

• SESSO IBUPROFENEEEEEEEE

The guy that sang this song actually has the same birthday as me, so in my eyes, I feel like he has some charm to it. I’m biased lol sorry

There’s way too many more but I am afraid of flooding my post beyond your readability interest. Let’s hope that, in an event of Italy’s victory or non, we’ll get to see an even more iconic event of Sanremo emerge come the future. <3

ANY LAST WORDS?

Måneskin’s big goal was to rock Eurovision, and I think they’ve greatly accomplished that by just... doing what they do best, and that is, rocking. They leave energy lasting for days.

In bocca al lupo, fam. You’ll nail it, and even if you don’t win, Italy shouldn’t not hail you as national heroes after it’s all over.

[imagitory]

D-Views OFF TOPIC!: The Prince of Egypt

Hello, everyone! Welcome to another installment of D-Views Off-Topic! As stated previously, D-Views is a series primarily focusing on Disney-produced and/or owned films, but from time to time, we go “off topic” to discuss films that are sometimes mistaken for and/or were influenced by Disney projects, and that’s what we’re doing today.

I am super excited about today’s subject – it has been one of my favorite films since I was a child, and it is, in my opinion, the single best non-Disney-produced animated film ever made. This is The Prince of Egypt!

Before we talk about The Prince of Egypt, it is imperative to talk about the studio that created it, DreamWorks SKG. (As a side, get used to me calling it just “Dreamworks” from here on out – I’ve never been much one to capitalize the “W.”) Dreamworks was the baby of three media giants – David Geffen, Stephen Spielberg, and most of all Jeffrey Katzenberg. Katzenberg got his start in the world of animation at the Walt Disney Company during the Disney Renaissance, when he was head of the Disney animation department. Unfortunately Katzenberg was just one of three very big egos at the company in that period, and he butted heads with the other two – CEO Michael Eisner and vice-chairman Roy E. Disney – constantly. For a while Frank Wells, Eisner’s partner, was able to keep the peace and keep these three working toward the same goal, but when Wells tragically passed away in a helicopter crash in 1994, tensions began to rise. Disney and especially Eisner thought that Katzenberg had been promoting himself as the main face of Disney’s new-found success and taking all the credit for it, and so when Wells was to be replaced, Eisner pointedly passed Katzenberg over for promotion. Whatever one thinks about Eisner or Katzenberg as people, I think it is very clear that Eisner felt threatened by Katzenberg…and he had good reason, because when Katzenberg was forced to quit his position at Disney, he immediately turned around and enlisted the support of Stephen Spielberg and David Geffen to create Disney’s main rival in the world of animation in recent history.

Dreamworks Animation found most of its animators among Disney alumni and from Stephen Spielberg’s dead studio Amblimation, which had previously only worked on three films: An American Tail: Fievel Goes West, We’re Back!: A Dinosaur’s Story, and Balto. Despite their lack of experience, they were very talented, as is evident by Dreamworks’ first hand-drawn film. Yep – first hand-drawn film. Dreamworks released two films in 1998; their real first film, Antz, was released in theaters three months before The Prince of Egypt was. To be frank, I wish that The Prince of Egypt had been first – it would’ve made a much stronger first impression for the studio as a whole.

Fortunately The Prince of Egypt made a pretty good impression when it was released to theaters in December 1998. It earned over $218 million worldwide and received rather favorable reviews from critics for its animation and visual effects. It also won an Academy Award for Best Song and was nominated for two Golden Globes, two Grammy Awards, and five Annie Awards, and even tied with Pixar’s rival film to Antz, A Bug’s Life, at the Critics’ Choice Awards for Best Animated Film. Even at the time of its release, however, The Prince of Egypt was compared to Disney’s animated projects. Critic James Berardinelli said this –

“Like Fox (with Anastasia) and Warner Brothers (with the disappointing (sic) Quest for Camelot), Dreamworks intends to challenge Disney's reign as the King of Animation. The Prince of Egypt is a worthy starting point. It ranks alongside the Magic Kingdom's Mulan at the top of the year's traditional-style animated pile. (…)While last year's Anastasia managed to come close to Disney's visual elegance, The Prince of Egypt matches it. This impressive achievement uncovers yet another chink in Disney's once-impregnable animation armor.”

Now that I have effectively “prologued” you to death, let’s go ahead and talk about the film proper.

The very first thing we have to talk about when it comes to this movie is its music, written by film-scoring giant Hans Zimmer and lyrical god Stephen Schwartz. Just like in Beauty and the Beast and Anastasia, this soundtrack in my opinion is just flawless. Every single song hits your heart and stays with you long after they have passed, from the lyrical musical numbers to the instrumental tracks. The first one, “Deliver Us,” introduces us to the setting of the mature, real, passionate, epic story that is about to unravel. We hear the culture in the rhythms and instruments used and in the Hebrew lyrics sung by Ofra Haza, who plays Moses’s mother Yoheved. We feel the hopelessness of the slaves and the fragile hope of a young girl as she sees her baby brother being taken in by the Queen of Egypt. We watch this opening scene with almost no dialogue, being told solely with the images on screen and the wonderful music, and become completely emotionally invested in these characters by the end. With this opening, the film has already done what the best musicals do – introduce our story, conflict, and characters solely through song. And from here, the music only gets better.

After this prologue, we meet our main character again, as well as his adopted brother, the crown prince Rameses. Moses and Rameses are shown, in their youth, to be like two troublemaking college kids, constantly competing with one another and having no awareness of grim reality. They are two princes, born in wealth and affluence, and as of yet do not see their privilege. Once their fun is through, however, we are introduced to their father, Pharaoh Seti. In his first scene, we see Seti as a strict man, focused on his legacy and greatly disappointed in his sons’ misadventures, particularly on Rameses’s part. At this point, we can still understand where Seti is coming from – after all, Rameses and Moses did cause some damage and they should be setting a better example as princes – but that doesn’t make watching Seti viciously snap at Rameses and Rameses struggling to hold in his hurt any easier.

Like Anastasia as well, this film has an all-star cast. Val Kilmer, Ralph Fiennes, Michelle Pfieffer, Sandra Bullock, Jeff Goldblum, Patrick Stewart, Steve Martin, Martin Short…although I could argue in some future projects, Dreamworks focused too much on casting big names in a lazy attempt to get more butts in the theater seats (looking at you, Shark Tale), I think in this case, every casting choice made was pretty spot-on. My personal favorite casting is Fiennes as Rameses – Rameses as a character is much more complex than most “antagonists” in other mainstream family films, and I think it would’ve been hard to find someone better than Fiennes to portray that.

Rameses and Moses is my single favorite relationship in this movie, and it makes sense – it is clearly the one the filmmakers put the most focus and effort into. Rameses can be a serious, proud, ambitious cynic, while Moses can be a light-hearted, sympathetic, mischievous peacemaker. Basically it’s a bond between a Slytherin and a Hufflepuff – darkness and light – and the relationship between these two brothers is so well written that it alludes to years of history that justifies the strength of their trust. It’s why Moses tries to make peace between Rameses and Seti once Rameses storms out of the room. It’s why Moses tries so hard to cheer Rameses up afterwards. It’s why Rameses, upon being formally named Prince Regent, names Moses his Royal Chief Architect.

Speaking of which, at the party where Rameses is given that title, we meet the character of Tzipporah, who is given to Rameses as a gift, but who Rameses “re-gifts” to Moses. In this sequence, we see another hint of Moses’s compassion. When the guards try to capture Tzipporah, swords drawn, Moses immediately intercedes and tries to restrain her himself, so that she wouldn’t be hurt or killed by the guards. Admittedly he mischievously lets her fall into a fountain, but it is still an infinitely kinder way to halt her escape than the alternative would’ve been. Nonetheless, we see Moses regretting his action when he sees his mother’s disappointment and Tzipporah’s wrath. Later Tzipporah escapes from the palace, and Moses pursues her. When Moses spots that some guards are about to catch her escaping, however, he once again intercedes. This time he actually misdirects them, sending them up to his chambers and away from Tzipporah, who had been directly behind them. It gives a subtle hint that Moses, even before learning the truth of his heritage, does have something in him that sees the value of freedom. Moses then follows Tzipporah all the way to the border of Egypt, until she escapes off into the desert. It is here that Moses meets Miriam and Aaron – his real siblings.

GOOD GOD THIS SCENE. ALL OF THE FEELS FOR THIS SCENE. I swear, I can’t help but feel so much for Miriam here. The hope in her voice is just heartbreaking when Aaron tries so hard to shut her down and Moses retorts in ignorant outrage. Then Miriam starts singing her mother’s old lullaby, and everything just…stops. The music dies utterly, and the only thing hanging in the air is Miriam’s choked voice. (Fun bit of trivia: one of the film’s directors, Brenda Chapman, provided Miriam’s voice in this scene. You may also know Brenda Chapman as the brain behind Disney/Pixar’s film Brave.)

Miriam’s hushed reprise then dissolves into quiet, horrified orchestration that then slowly builds, until it stumbles back and charges into a run just as Moses does. This orchestration then leads us into my favorite song in the entire film, “All I Ever Wanted.” From the time I was young, this song could always get my heart pounding. I felt all of the fear, all of the longing, all of the denial, all of the pride, and all of the doubt that rippled through Moses’s voice and over his face. When I was in high school and I would listen to this in my headphones on my way to school, I would run down the streets just like Moses did in the film, plodding through all the emotions expressed in each note. Even now I think it is one of the most unique songs sung by a protagonist in a musical that I’ve ever heard. Most “I Want” songs are about wanting more, but this song is about wanting things to stay the same. Rather than seeking adventure, Moses seeks peace and happiness – to stay in this dream world that he’s only just seeing was just a dream. It reminds me of how I felt when the September 11th terrorist attacks happened. When you first see the fragments of your old life shattered around you, you first feel this instinct to grab them and try hopelessly to glue them back together. As time goes by, though, you see how painful such an effort is – it’s like even just clutching those broken shards of your childhood is making your hands bleed – and so you have no choice but to let go of them.

“All I Ever Wanted” dissolves into Moses’s dream sequence, which is entirely drawn in a hieroglyphic-inspired style. This is such a creative sequence – it’s so stylistic, and yet it doesn’t forget to make the stilted movements translate the proper emotions. When Moses wakes up from the nightmare, he also wakes up from his delusion, and decides he must learn the truth. This revelation scene is my favorite part of the entire film. Moses runs down the halls of hieroglyphics, combing wall after wall, until he finally finds what he’s looking for. He sees the image of his father, Seti, ordering his guards to throw babies into the Nile River. The young prince is horrified, heartbroken, at what he sees…and Seti brings a hand down on top of his head, trying to show him some comfort. Moses turns to look at him, pleading with him, “Father, tell me you didn’t do this,” but Seti cannot give Moses that “out.” Instead the old Pharaoh justifies the decision, and even worse, tries to excuse it. “They were only slaves.” Seti’s evil face is truly revealed – the face of callous, wicked ignorance, garbing itself in gold and silk. For more of my thoughts on this scene, you may read this post of mine analyzing it, but to sum it up here, this is the scene that taught me as a kid that evil is not always self-aware…and it even now chills me, just as much as it does Moses. That horrible shrieking of the strings that accompanies Moses’s facial shift from sorrow to horror as he slowly removes himself from Seti’s arms and backs away is a musical representation of everything I feel watching this scene.

After being counseled by his adopted mother Tuya, Moses tries simply to be happy with his fortunate circumstances, but now that he knows the truth of his birth, he can no longer not see the injustices and cruelty around him. He can’t block out the image of his people being worked within an inch of their lives. He can’t block out the furious shouts of an overseer and the horrible, pained cries of an elderly slave being whipped. And it is in this sequence that we get one of the best instrumental tracks in the entire film. The track is called “Goodbye Brother,” and it accompanies Moses accidentally killing an overseer to protect a slave and running away from home. I’ve also discussed this track (and a few others from this film) in another post, but like with Seti, I will restate my core points here. The best piece of this track is the middle, which happens just before Moses kills the overseer. It is a horrific, demented shrieking, one that sounds like what nails being driven into your brain should feel like. The sound is like the accompaniment of a nightmare that you can’t escape. And then just as suddenly, the nightmarish feeling is gone…to be replaced with a different kind of fear and horror, the kind that you feel when you realize it’s not just a horrible dream, the kind that gives way to panic. Moses running away is echoed in the music with every racing, plodding note, until it, like Moses, is brought to a rough halt. From here, a great sorrowful sound takes over – as if the music is mourning what could’ve been just as much as Moses is. Partner this with the tragic verbal exchange between Rameses and Moses, and I think just about everyone’s heart will break by the end of the scene.

So from here, Moses flees into the desert, shedding his identity as a Prince of Egypt, and joining Tzipporah’s tribe of Midianites. While there, we get another amazing song (“Through Heaven’s Eyes”) and see Moses grow from a boy into a man. Even though Moses has grown so much, however, there is still business for him to take care of, and that business becomes clear when he follows a lost sheep into a cave and finds a Bush alight with white, inhuman fire. The instrumental for this sequence, “The Burning Bush,” is in my opinion not only the best instrumental in the film, but also the best non-Disney instrumental I have ever heard. I have never been a particularly religious person – Hell, my parents are a non-practicing Christian and an Atheist. But whenever I encounter a particularly wonderful piece of art, landscape, or music, I think I feel what some people call spirituality. It is a sensation that makes you feel lighter and warmer, like a balloon slowly filling up with air, devoid of fear, worry, and pain. It is a dreamy feeling that makes you feel one with everything, and everything feel like it is as it should be…and once you know that feeling, you can’t imagine losing it. This track is a perfect representation of those feelings – it is enlightenment, in musical form, from its raindrop-like pattering to its slowly rotating tone like a globe spinning on its axel.

Something else interesting about this sequence is how God is depicted. Unlike in The Ten Commandments, which The Prince of Egypt is based upon, this God is depicted more like the New Testament God, being much kinder and gentler than the vengeful God that is more often found in the Old Testament. On top of this, this God is actually voiced by Val Kilmer, who also voiced Moses, making it so Val Kilmer is technically talking to himself in this scene. There are two ways I could read this – one, it speaks of how God is representative of Moses’s inner-voice, so this scene is a metaphor for Moses coming to grips with his own morality; or two, Moses is seeing himself in God, because Man was made in God’s image, and so by the end understands that he has God’s power inside of himself. Either way, Moses realizes that he can’t run away from his responsibility to his people and goes back to Egypt to confront the Pharaoh.

Alas, when Moses arrives, he does not confront Seti, but his brother Rameses. I cannot lie, Rameses and Moses reuniting is a scene that always makes me smile, even if my heart’s breaking at the same time. GODDAMN IT, MOVIE, HOW DARE YOU DO THIS TO ME. After the “Playing with the Big Boys” song number by Hotep and Huy (which I suppose is the weakest of the songs, but is still pretty damn good), Rameses and Moses talk the matter over. Moses tries to explain his position to Rameses, and it is here that Rameses too finds his rose-colored glasses cracking. His idealistic hope that his brother was back and they could live as they had is flickering and dying. There is no going back for Moses. He is choosing the well being of Hebrew slaves over the brother he grew up with. And this betrayal hurts Rameses deeply. The animation on Rameses’s face in this scene – from heartbreak, to anger, to shock, to regret, to grief, to vengeance – is perfectly paced and spot-on. From this scene on, Rameses has officially become the anti-villain of the film – the reluctant rival to our reluctant hero.

On the face of things, Moses has made everything worse with his return. Rameses has turned against him and the slaves bitterly scorn him for his battle against Pharaoh. But one slave is with him from the start – his sister Miriam. She rallies the slaves behind Moses, and Moses stands with new strength. He commands Rameses again to “let his people go,” again, again, again, with multiple plagues, to the accompaniment of “The Plagues.” My favorite part in this song is the inner-monologues from our hero and our anti-villain that unconsciously mirror each other.

Once I called you brother; // You who I called brother,

Once I thought the chance to make you laugh // How could you have come to hate me so?

Was all I ever wanted… // Is this what you wanted?

And of course the ending –

I will not LET your/my PEOPLE…GO!

The Plagues play out one by one, before we reach the Plague of Darkness. Moses goes to find Rameses and tries one last time to convince him to relent before the next Plague arrives. I’ve talked about this scene and Rameses’s son in the past, and you can read that here, but I will just add that I love the parallels this scene makes to earlier scenes of Moses in the palace. Not only do some shots parallel the scene of Moses comforting Rameses at the beginning of the movie, but Moses also passes the pillar and statues that he runs to in the “All I Ever Wanted” sequence. It’s such a bittersweet juxtaposition.

Sadly Moses and Rameses cannot go back to the way things were, however much they wish it. The destinies that have been written for them and the responsibilities therein make it impossible…and this scene proves this once and for all. Rameses, refusing to drop his pride and refusing to bow to the pressure of someone who threatens the security of his empire, crosses the line and threatens the murder of Moses’s people. Moses cannot save him or Egypt from the final Plague now…and so the First Born are slain, with an inhuman light that literally breathes His victims’ last breath.  

The scene centering on the Death of the First Born is a very powerful one. A striking choice is having it mostly done in silence, with no instrumental music at all. The only sounds other than the Angel’s breathing are the blowing wind, some rattling of trees and roofs, crickets chirping, and finally the howls of despair from all of the parents upon discovering their dead children. The scene hits home when we see Rameses holding his dead son in his arms – Moses comes up behind him out of the white light beyond, and for a moment, he is the Angel of Death himself, bearing witness to the grief of the Pharaoh that was once his brother. And as much as I disapprove of Rameses’ sentiments in the last scene and agree that Moses’s people should be freed…I do not blame Rameses in the least for his inconsolable, furious withdrawal from Moses’s comforting hand. I don’t think I could forgive anyone who took someone I love from me…no matter how noble the person’s cause. This still does not make me feel any less for Moses when he walks off by himself, drops his staff, and then slowly falls to his knees, collapsing in on himself as he tries in vain to suppress his sobs.

At long last, the Hebrews have their freedom, and with it, we get our final lyrical number – the Academy-Award-winning song “When You Believe.” This song is a good example of how, even though this film can get so serious, those darker elements are mitigated perfectly with a lot of sincerity and heart. This song is like a beautiful sunrise after a night of thunderstorms. The mist is still clinging to the air and remnants of the rain are still falling from the shingles of roofs, but sunlight is bouncing off the droplets, sparkling like tiny diamonds, and the clouds are touched with pink. Then the children start their verses in Hebrew, and a new, youthful life is infused into the piece, ringing with the hopes and dreams of a new beginning. Where something has ended, something has now begun, and after the darkest of nights, the sun has returned.

Just when it seems the Hebrews have succeeded, Rameses does try one last time to circumvent them, by charging after them with his army. Moses parts the Red Sea, the Hebrews make it across, and the Sea comes back together just as Rameses and his army are charging through it. It is only after this that we come full circle – the music at last returns to the theme from the very beginning, “Deliver Us.” Moses has answered that prayer. He has delivered his people to freedom. And so as Moses comes down Mount Sinai with the Ten Commandments in hand, I frankly don’t care about what happens next in the actual Biblical story – the ending is more than enough to fulfill me.

The Prince of Egypt is very special to me. As you can tell from all of the links in this post, it is a movie I love talking about and I think I will never stop talking about. It saddens me that this film is not more recognized by the world at large, like so many other great animated films are. Its soundtrack is in my opinion one of the best animated musical soundtracks ever recorded. Its animation is stunning, evocative, and detailed. Its characters are multi-faceted and real. Its story is epic, timeless, and emotional. Recently there was an attempt to bring it to Broadway, but that attempt was scrapped because of the backlash in response to its all-white cast (gee, I can’t imagine why *oh hai there sarcasm*). I sincerely hope that the project will be attempted again, however – maybe The Prince of Egypt can be brought back to the public consciousness again by going to the Broadway stage, as Anastasia has. In the meantime, though, we do have the original masterpiece, and I will always view it as the best film ever produced by Dreamworks.