#i think it's like how boys are super into ww2?

[rubiscodisco]

I think about the Roman Empire a fair amount but NOT in a boy way just so y'all know

[recreationalfanfics]

*bust in the door with Sinor Chonker in my right arm and a cup of cold brew coffee with churro creamer in my left hand*

Okay hear me out on this!!

Having Jeb and Oct with us is cool and talking to our favorite night guard through the mirror is an extra, but what if we could able to talk with the other crew with said mirror and talking to hysterical figure and introduce them to our friends and having to translate with some of them while in conversation as if it's a normal Tuesday

Like Huns being the awesome warlord be bit protective over mc and looking at Sebek and in translation if he did anything that we didn't like hell glady fight him

Or our favorite Pharaoh man ( who I have a childhood crush like come-on ) happily talk to us and seeing our new friends went to king mode on some because he wanted mc to feel safe and not get in to trouble with them

Talking with historical figures and talking about what they did in their time out is the open be both comedic and to the tw guys be horrified on some stuff out in the open ( like if a WW2 soldier making a joke about ww2 related stuff ) or give really organized military stuff to help mc with stuff like school work or their work around the school

I don't blame you for the crush on Ahk, Rami Malek is so fjwjfjejfj-

- BUT YEAH, TONS OF OTHER PEOPLE DEFINETLY USE THE MIRROR TO TALK TOO, not just Larry and Nicky but Teddy and Sacagewa like to make sure you're okay.

- I like to think some of the Twst Boys know what Attila is saying as he threatens them to protect you but like, others just think he's super cool looking and you try to soften his translation so they aren't so violent.

- BUT ALSO, ATTILA AND HIS HUNS LOVE MAGIC SO THE BOYS KINDA WIN THEM OVER EASILY but don't get me wrong, they're still very worried for you.

- You can also use them to teach the guys about history from your world. Like, you're telling them about cavemen and showing them and the cave guys are just super hyped to see you until they see that Ace has a hand on your shoulder and being the big brother figures they are, they just freak out and Larry is all: "How about we move onto Teddy next!?"

- I like to think that Teddy would definetly give Leona a pep talk or something. Like, Teddy having to deal with not being the real Theodore Roosevelt kind fits with Leona not being the crown prince and stuff and while their situations aren't the same, Teddy giving Leona some enlightenment.

- ROOK ENJOYS MOMENTS TO MEET ALL YOUR NEW FRIENDS, SO HE CAN SEE ALL THE BEAUTY. He 100% would be super flattering to Sacagewa and Ahkmenrah and how they must've been the pinnacle of beauty at their time and Sacagewa just being polite and Ahk being super awkward but happy to be there. ALSO, SACAGEWA AND ROOK EXCHANGING HUNTING AND TRACKING TIPS AND YOU'RE JUST THERE LIKE: "PLEASE DON'T-"

- They are exposed to more darker parts of your history and while not everything is sunshine and rainbows, when they hear about the wars and the atrocities, you just tell your dad to maybe move the mirror but they're also just so fascinated by how people from your world may not have magic but they definetly have the wits to create some serious fire power. Like, they couldn't fathom how wars without magic would be like and now they know and it definetly gives them a new look on your world.

- ALL OF THE EXHIBITS MISS YOU THOUGH. Dexter stealing the mirror from Larry so he can have you all to himself and throwing a tantrum when another of the Twst guys try to look at him. He seems to like Floyd though which is really concerning.

- You even show them things that you might have in common with their world. Such as European history, Persian history, and African history and it really sticks out to some students who are there like: "Wow, those buildings look similar to the ones we have here!"

- All of the exhibits definetly all try to tell you goodnight before morning, scold Jed and Octavius if they gave you any trouble and you tell them goodnight and watch from the mirror as the sun rises and they all go still. You miss them a lot and while it's fun to introduce the guys to your world, it only makes you ache for it more.

[lord-of-simons-ghost]

LOTF HEADCANONS >:)

This is going to be a list of my on-island/book time period headcanons (HINT NOT CANON). The majority are my own, and some are my "adopted" headcanons. Each section will be headed! Pre/post island headcanons will be done later since this is super long already

I'm sorry for any grammatical errors or inconsistencies

TWS: Mentions of character death, religious stuff, Implied child death

This is LOTF content, so expect it to be a little dark! Take care of yourself <3

Island/Time Period

- Took place in the late 40s/early 50s. Not during/post WW2 but instead during a new fictitious war caused by nuclear threats in Europe. This is why the boys were sent away from their boarding school in the UK (I'll elaborate on this in a bit).

-The island itself was decent sized with 3 beaches: The meetings/crash took place on the largest beach of the island, which faced West.

-The center of the island was dense woods and heavy foliage. Pig runs ran throughout the entire center and led out to the eastern side of the island.

-Castle Rock and Fire Mountain were to the north, meaning shelters/bathing pools were on the southwest side of the island. Shelters were originally going to be built closer to the mountain.

-After the first fire, the northern side of the island lost the majority of the trees around the mountain. This is one of the reasons the shelters were shifted to the West.

-The island had amazing sunsets, so Ralph would try to have their non-emergency meetings around this time to have as many of the kids witness them as possible. Usually worked.

-Castle Rock was lower down in elevation than Fire Mountain, but it had a very good view of the whole island. It had a ledge above a part of the Eastern beach (where the pigs often lay. This is where Piggy dies. The feast took place in the westeast).

-The boys were on the island for 5 1/2 months.

The Biguns

Choir boys will be highlighted blue

Ages (oldest to youngest): Jack (13), Maurice (13), Roger (13), Ralph (13), Simon (12), Robert (12), Piggy (12), Eric (11), Sam (11), Bill (11)

[sorry if I forgot anyone, these are just the ones I have ages for. Choir has roughly 6 more members in my hcs. ]

-Took the choir a week or so to remember everyone else's names (-Piggy).

-Didn't really mind if someone stayed behind during hunts earlier on, but as time progressed, Jack and Roger would get more and more annoyed. Ralph, Simon and Piggy never joined but helped prepare the pig once or twice before roasting it.

- The majority of them, even Jack and Ralph, would have nightmares later on (think around the time Samneric found the parachutist) and it would put everyone on even more of an edge.

-Arguments would break out within the Choir boys frequently (mainly Roger and Maurice), and Simon or Ralph would have to mediate them. It became the norm until Jack overtook as chief.

-Roger was really the only biggun that wanted to join Jack in the end, even though Ralph kinda sucked. None of them really liked Jack OR Ralph (- Simon, Piggy and Samneric).

-Roger got the most into the final hunt, commanding everyone and instructing them how to hunt Ralph alongside Jack. They scared the littluns that were a part of the tribe and the younger biguns. Everyone enjoyed it in the moment, don't get me wrong, but like. Once that Naval officer showed up, they were INSTANTLY feeling guilty and horrible. (-Jack and Roger. They took time)

Individual Biguns

Jack:

- Kept his choir uniform throughout the duration on the island. Reminded him of when life was less complicated.

- Would still rehearse with the choir for the first month or so before everyone got too involved in the island to care. Jack would still sing whilst doing busy work, fire duty, or meetings to bring comfort to himself.

-Never hated Ralph. He felt very conflicted when interacting with him and was jealous of his authoritative role. He ultimately didn't want Ralph to abandon/hate him, and when this happened, Jack felt extremely betrayed. Even when hunting him at the end, Jack never felt hatred but rather power hungry.

- He and Ralph were friends for 3 or so months and would hang out often. They confided in each other and were actually really close.

- Suffered with anxiety episodes on the island.

- His hair grew so long to the point Simon showed him how to tie it into a bun with plants. He kept it like that for the rest of his time on the island.

- Watched the sunset with Simon, and they would hang out and rely on each other during the night. Jack didn't want to be seen with him during the day, but he would always pick him for hikes and stuff if he needed to bring someone else along.

- Speaking of Simon, Jack didn't realise it was him during the dance until it was too late to do anything. He grieved with the other choir boys and remained to feel guilty for a while. Jack (and sometimes the others) would go out to the beach where he died and make flower crowns, plant boats, stuff like that, and would send them into the ocean as a way to remember and say thank you to Simon.

- He and Roger are besties, and it's very cheesy

- Bathed a little more regularly than the others but not as often than he should have

- Rarely got sleep on the island and when he did it wasn't good sleep. Ran on adrenaline most days

- Loved being able to put on the clay mask because it covered his "ugliness"

- Lost a significant amount of his hearing during the plane crash/war and had a hard time navigating that on the island. Never really mentioned it to anyone until months after being rescued (this is partly @mccall-me-maurice 's headcanon and I love it so much)

Maurice:

- Gremlin, always caused problems and blamed it on Roger (I hc them as cousins)

- Smiled so frequently to the point it freaked Ralph out. The choir boys are used to it.

- Smiled as a way to mask since he hated talking about his feelings and felt if he smiled no one would ask if he was okay (mecore)

- Not very helpful but did what he was told....sometimes

- Didn't get along with the littluns (stupid sandcastles) and would tease them/stick his tongue out at them.

- Hyped up Jack's ideas but also listened to Ralph when he was chief

- Extroverted

- Didn't really put on a mask when hunting since it inched his face but he would paint his body to blend in better.

- Stinky boi

- Friends with the biguns and felt a little disappointed Ralph didn't want to join Jack's tribe

Roger:

- Quiet (unless he's being snarky) when in large groups but would become extroverted around Jack/Maurice

- Got bored so often he just caused chaos

- Had a hard time communicating his genuine thoughts into words so Jack would help him talk to the other boys.

- Sarcastic and kind of a smart-ass, especially to Ralph and Piggy

- Always mixed up the twins and started just pointing and calling one of them "you"

- Middle-child syndrome.

-Felt he did everyone a favor when he dropped the Boulder on Piggy.

- Friends with Simon, but they really only interacted pre-island (Kinda like with Jack, didn't want to be seen with him becuase he thought it would make him "batty")

-Perfered to do things in solitude or duos

- Had a very dark way of thinking about things and people. He still longed for authority and normalcy but thought of people as evil, and only a select few were "good." It's very contradicting, and Roger has a hard time navigating his thoughts.

- Always had intricate paintings whenever the group would redo their masks.

Ralph:

- Saw the beach and was all like "So much room to do cartwheels"

- Would watch the sunrises with Simon

- Got really bad migraines often and would have to be out of commission for a few days. Jack would take over and make a small army

- Always thinking about how life was before, what his family/friends were up to, etc...

- Didn't actually want to be chief and hated it for a while but grew to enjoy the authority that came with it

- Stole all of Piggy's ideas and would act like they were his own

- Would help the littluns but never enjoyed it

- Slept like an egg 🥚 (curled up in a ball almost)

- Would go on walks frequently to try and clear his head. Overthought everything, often stressing himself out over it and needing to then take another mental break

- Loved loved loved watching fire burn, even in the end

- Friendly towards everyone (on occasions) but only considered Piggy and Simon to be his friends (+ Jack for a few months)

- Felt really hurt that Jack turned on him. Ralph hated him for a bit but got over it eventually (like waaaaay post island)

Simon:

- Loved catching critters/bugs and showing them to Ralph. He would tell him their species, what they ate, etc

- Nocturnal. Literally was up almost all night just roaming the forest, doing fire duty, helping littluns, stuff like that

- Helped paint intricate designs on the choir boys the first time they proposed the idea to him because he wanted to paint something.

- Would make patterns in the sand, let the sea wash them away, and repeat the process

- Very calm and quiet. Didn't hate anyone

- Had a crush on Ralph but tried very hard to hide it. (Worked pretty well!)

- Loved the littluns with every bone in his body because they reminded him of his younger siblings. Did everything in his power to make sure they were comfortable.

- Despite being "friends" with Jack, Simon never agreed with his morals/ideas and found Ralph's more sensible. However, he didn't like either in an authoritarian role and thought they all should have been in charge and involved in making decisions.

- Knew he was going to die that night but wanted to warn the others/see them one last time

- Poetic. He would tell poems to anyone who would listen

- Calmed down fights, anxiety attacks, etc....

- Epileptic and hypoglycemic (constantly growing faint, so he tried to stay out of the sun as much as possible and take breaks when needed)

- Thought that the Lord of the Flies was God punishing him for his sins (he literally had none)

- Prayed often to bring comfort to himself

(I have literally no headcanons for Robert ;-;)

Piggy:

- Actually 🤓☝️ (I'm joking I swear)

- Got his feelings hurt easily but tried to hide it when he was sad

- Always thought of what he was going to bake with his Auntie when he got home

- Constantly came up with actually good ideas but never got to share them since Ralph kinda blew them off

- Had a few asthma attacks on the island (like 2 + the Canon one) and Simon and Bill would help him out

- Got very overwhelmed by the littluns but tried to keep them accounted for and safe

- Did the analytical jobs on the island and was helpful with counting supplies

- Enjoyed watching fish swim in the streams/ocean

- Constantly feared for his safety when Jack/Roger were near

- Didn't want to share his name in fear of being even more humiliated and ultimately forgot who he was other than "Piggy"

- Knew he wasn't coming back from Caslte Rock

- Bad at emotionally heavy situations

Eric:

- Enjoyed hunting even though he wasn't very good at it

- Always did the rough/physical jobs when possible since he hated feeling weak at home

- Corrected the others when they called him Sam

- Loves his brother but got annoyed with him frequently

- Didn't swim more often than needed because he was scared of sharks

- Wanted to protect Sam so he stayed close at all times

- Had probably the most fun out of everyone on the island because he had Sam with him

- Always eager to try new things/help out

- Seemed to get comfy quicker than everyone else

- Favored Jack and his tribe in the beginning but quickly changed up when Jack started going coo coo

- Had an attitude

Sam:

- Hated hunted. It grossed him out. He went anyway to stay near Sam

- Perfered to swim on the beach and hang with the littluns rather than helping Ralph with labor

- Loved the ocean

- Got annoyed with how protective Sam was of him since it made him feel small

- Enjoyed Castle Rock and the view that came with it

- Favored Ralph from the beginning and would do *somethings* that he told Sam to do. Was quick to suggest to Eric that they helped Ralph when possible

- Bird watched with Piggy and Simon

- Just overall a sweetheart to everyone

Bill:

- The only headcanon I have for Bill is that he was essentially the nurse of the island, and everyone would go to him for help. He learned all this stuff from his mom, who was a war nurse and just was super super helpful with keeping everyone from getting too badly hurt (this is also another adopted headcanon!)

Littluns

- Tried to start their own tribe and overthrow the older kids (didn't work)

- Has opinions about things and felt ignored most of the time

- Like 80% didn't make it off the island....

- Really just chilled in the sun all day

- Had fun throwing spears at Ralph in the end

- Really just did what they saw Jack do

- HATED RALPH

IM FINALLY DONE!! THIS TOOK A WEEK 😭

[popsicle86]

I read the Magic Trick theory document yesterday and it's been living in my head rent free since then.

(it's here if you haven't read it yet. It is excellent:

https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/193IXS11XN46lziHRb6eUpM17yK0BQkRqke1Wh64A_e0/mobilebasic

One of the biggest things that stuck with me is the idea of reality being rewritten/rebooted. Because we actually know it already has been. By Adam. And not everything went back to the way it was before.

Interesting how the 2 nuns that saved him as a baby are now living next door to Aziraphale. And miracles don't work on them. And they stay to protect Aziraphale. And help Crowley work out his feelings.

And every mini-sode (apart from Edinburgh) introduces one of the new characters this season into Crowley and Aziraphale's past. Job introduces Muriel, who is joined by Saraquel in the present. WW2 introduces Shax and Furfur. Edinburgh doesn't introduce a character but it does introduce the statue though, and give the place that ends up being the turning point for Gabriel and Beelzebub (and their lovely, simple enemies, to friends to love story)

And interestingly all of these knew characters have little flaws. Some claim to know Crowley who has no memory of them. They spell like an 11 year old boy (ugrency, angle). And they are all now in key positions going forward. Demonic idiots on the dark council, a record keeper to guard the book shop and a new Arkangel to support the new supreme Arkangel. And 2 humans who have already shown major support for Crowley.

The text talks about the Pledge and one of the biggest pledges left hanging from Season 1 is that Adam still has his powers and is still out there. That has to payoff at some point or it wouldn't have been left.

So yeah, I think Adam is the one doing the "writing" for most of season 2. Until Metatron intervenes and tempts Aziraphale back to Heaven.

(and for the original author of the magic trick theory I did send this into your inbox but then I noticed you saying it's super busy so I have taken your advice and shared it with the fandom instead. I hope this is ok and not disrespectful as I have linked to your initial theory too)

[bitchwhoyoukiddin]

So, Princess Weekes posted a platform-exclusive video all about Endeavor form My Hero Academia. (ISTG, I cannot avoid Enji, and that's fine because he's lived, rent-free, in my brain for the last year.)

I can't link it and you need a Nebula membership to watch it, but if you can and do, I recommend both a membership and tracking the video down. I agree with a whole lot of what she says, especially the central thesis of the video, which is that Endeavor owning his behavior, realizing how shitty it was, and working to change while expecting nothing from his family in return is the actual point. And IDK, it was just really cool to see someone with a platform point that out.

I don't agree with everything she said. I think she missed a lot of the nuance that I like to wallow in. Specifically in that a whole lot of people don't take into account the continued work-related PTSD that Enji took on. He was the #2 hero in Japan for 20 years. That included multiple natural disasters, giant fights, and a ton of rescue and salvage work. As much as we like to pretend that work is work, and home is home, that's just not true. Add in him watching his father's death during a rescue, and Touya's childhood ambition and willingness to hurt himself to be better (I do not blame child!Touya, he was a child), and you get a traumatized, poorly emotionally regulated man in a paternalistic society that deems him incredibly high status. AND, it was heavily indicated that Enji's childhood and very early years were during a time where AFO was heavily in power and there was a ton of chaos both in society and in public/the hero world.

I say this as a child of someone in an incredibly high-stress job, who had lingering CPTSD from military service, but Endeavor's emotional dis-regulation and emotional apathy? WOOF. We'll just say that MHA did an incredibly good job of showing someone who's in a late-career situation without a whole lot of mental health support. And that matters. Because while it doesn't excuse Enji emotionally abusing his children and physically abusing his wife, it does a whole lot of heavy lifting for me in explaining it. Add in that I'm PRETTY SURE no one ever sat Enji down and explained emotional intelligence because he was a Japanese BOY and first son. Like, there's a whole lot there culturally both in Japan AND for men growing up post WW2 in the West.

I also very much disagree with her conclusion re: Touya. But I'll own that I think Touya deserved the fate he got. 100%. Because as much as I can and do sympathize with an abused child lashing out, I'm sorry but he is a grown ass man who made those choices. If we're going to hold people (especially Endeavor) accountable for his own actions? For what he did? We have to do the same for Touya. Period. Enji stood up and took accountability and atonement for what he did. Was Enji an abused child? Likely not, but we don't know. He went through a severe trauma. And continued to do so, as a working first-responder for over twenty years. Touya also deserves to take responsibility for the lives he chose to end. For the damage he chose to inflict. In the same way I get heated about how fans and the Todoroki kids blame Enji for how Rei burned Souto's face? When she herself takes ownership of it from the minute go? Touya deserves to take ownership and agency for the damage he did. Both to himself and others.

What Enji eventually owns what he did to his family. There are explanations, not excuses. Touya 100% deserves to take ownership for his choices and the damage he did. Enji's abuse was an explanation, not an excuse.

(Also, I hope AFO is getting some kind of karma somewhere. Absolutely fuck that guy.)

And that's one area that I very much disagree with in Weekes' video. But then, I think that's a pretty big unpopular opinion in the MHA fandom in the first place.

That said, I am super cheerful Weekes made a video! It was incredibly funny to see it pop up in my feed when I was all "I am mad at how people get Endeavor wrong, HATE HIM FOR THE RIGHT REASONS, DAMMIT!" the night it popped up and I had to wait because I couldn't take another hot take. *cackles*

I'll also say that I very much agree with her that everyone's got the right to feel however they do about Enji. I did cackle when she kind of referenced the "Endeavor is not your dad, stop projecting" post though. That made me cackle outloud and deeply suspect Weekes is hanging out on Tumblr somewhere. (Hi, if you see it!)

[sansahightower]

A write-up on Alicent that I did on Reddit that I thought I would post here.

Who is Alicent for?

I saw on Twitter, (I know I know), an accusation that “Alicent is for the male gaze.” The implication was, Olivia Cooke is beautiful, she has done a Fenty spread, and therefore the show runners want men to love her. This tenuous connection aside, it did get me thinking about Alicent.

From what I have seen, most men do not like her nor do most women. I think she is terribly misunderstood by the audience as a whole. Rhaenyra gets to claim feminism while Alicent is declared an “agent for the patriarchy” or a “Trump woman.” Rhaenys mocks her for only wanting a “window in her prison”, not desiring the iron throne for herself but only for her son.

Alicent is not a girl boss or a “yesss queen.” She isn’t as full of confidence and agency as she is in Fire and Blood. Alicent is scared and full of anxiety, her mind constantly darting about to consider what will help her family. Her thoughts are not for herself or for her power. They are about survival.

And that is why, in spite of many people’s protestations, I believe Alicent is more similar to most women across history and cultures than any other female character. She is flawed, she is stressed, and she feels alone.

Before Xanax, there was a tranquilizer called Miltown. It arrived on the scene in the 1950s. The 1950s was a time when men and women were both getting very distinct spheres of operation. Prior to WW2, in the US, many families were homesteading and the duties of caring for the house and land were shared. Afterwards, there became a more stark divide with women being isolated at home alone with the children more and the crushing responsibilities of the home while many men tended to enjoy more freedom. This caused many women begin to break down, becoming agitated, anxious, or other ways disturbed. The solution? The addictive tranquilizer Miltown (a sort of parent to Xanax). Women were sedated to keep this idyllic life going. And of course, the phenomenon inspired stories such as Valley of the Dolls and Stepford Wives.

So let’s return to Alicent. She has done nothing but her duty. She has cared for, not just Viserys, but Jaehaerys as well. Out of duty to her father, she became a child bride. It’s likely she was pregnant with Daeron around the time Rhaenyra was pregnant with her first, Jace. Think about that gap. Alicent never had a chance to truly grow up. She had to learn on the go. And, if later scenes show us how things were the entire time, it’s likely Viserys doted on Rhaenyra while ignoring his wife and the children she gave him.

Viserys decays and dies slowly, offering her no support while she supports him constantly when he is at his worst. She did not get the man Aemma married. She got a man dying because the throne was rejecting him.

She was a vessel for him and then his hospice worker, one he never seemed to truly appreciate. One he called Aemma instead of her real name.

She says she is isolated and alone many times, and as she speaks, you can see the paranoia in her. Alicent’s struggles begin to parallel the struggles of the drugged housewives I mentioned even though the settings are vastly different.

But Alicent has no drugs to keep her quiet. So instead she begins to break a little. The entire family including her husband turns on her child who just lost an eye and no one will protect her except for her injured boy. And she snaps. She loses it. And she feels regret. She turns to religion for a shred of stability. You see her stressed and snapping and close to the brink when she slaps Aegon several times, warning him of their dire circumstances.

Alicent doesn’t have the luxury to coddle her children or be gentle. She’s trying to make it in circumstances that would alter anyone’s brain. But she loves her children. She is willing to die for them.

So who is Alicent for? She isn’t for anyone wanting entertainment or a super badass hero. But she is one of the most real representations of women to me. She represents those who struggle to survive in a suffocating society, the mental strain it takes on you. Alicent hasn’t had the luxury of attempting to buck the system. She isn’t a Targaryen. She does not have a dragon. Alicent is a woman trying to survive in a world that can change based on a Targaryen’s whim. Most women in history haven’t had the luxury of being a teenaged Rhaenyra and sneering openly at tradition. Most women have been in Alicent’s position.

That’s part of why people turning on her, especially women, is so baffling to me. Because in many cases, if we didn’t have more fortunate circumstances, couldn’t some of us become Alicent? Or, maybe we would just be drug-sedated versions of her.

Sorry for the novel, but I just had to ramble about her.

[mixedkid-matchup]

you do not have to answer this!! I'm using you to confess my dubious feelings for the Percy Jackson series bc you also expressed like some weird feelings about it, and I kind of thought the series was untouchable bc of how much everyone I see fawns over it, and I have GOT to get this off my chest to someone who might get what I'm saying. But I have major issues with the writing/premise/series bc it's just feels so deeply colonized and it's bothered me since it FIRST came out and everyone in middle school and high school was reading it and teachers were assigning it. Like the whole premise for the Greek gods being in the US is that they follow Western "progress" and it completely disregards all the amazing things Indigenous did and our way of life, and also removes the importance of place-based culture for both Greek stories and Native peoples (like okay all the Greek stuff moved to the U.S. but wth happened to all our spiritual figures?? The story completelya cts like Native people weren't here and didn't have complex beliefs and ways of life connected to the land, and the gods were just free to take over here with no issues). As a mixed Indigenous kid it just rubs me wrong in all the worst ways and the academic systems love affair with Greek and Roman stuff and Rick Riordan's sheer popularity has been forcing this stuff in my face foreveeeerrrr 😭😭 I was surprised to see your tags about the fandom being weird before too tho since I don't interact with it, so I hope you don't mind this ask and just know I kinda feel the same way!! Ok thanks bye sorry for the rant.

BRO I HAVE HAD THIS RANT ON HAND FOR A LONG TIME ITS OKAY!!!!!!!!!

I THINK IF HEARD ABOUT THIS ACTUALLY. but you explained it way better. like when i first read percy jackson ok fine i was 11, i obviously caught onto the ableism and such but i did not catch onto this until i thought about it when i got older. you're super right. the whole thing about ww2 being caused by demigods was the weirdest shit ever i literally did not remember reading it until i read lightning thief again last year. why did hitler need to be child of hades. THAT IS QUITE LITERALLY HOW PERCY DESCRIBES HADES WHEN HE SEES HIM. LOOKING LIKE HITLER. then what you're saying how they move with the places that are the most progressive and basically take over..... like it's just ..... incredibly misplaced and insensitive.

but about the fandom being weird (its literally encouraged by riordan's book tbh), in heroes of olympus, hazel is a black girl from lousiana in the 1930s?? or 40s idk anyways i think she dies and then nico brings her back. whatever, everyone draws her lightskin and with orange hair, and super skinny, (which she's from louisana. shes darkskin and does not have "caramel" hair i hate white men sometimes.) and shes like 13 btw and in a relationship with frank whos like 16. weird as hell and everyone thinks theyre so sweet. and also rick cannot write meaningful young women. and especially not girls of color. like its WEIRD how piper is portrayed as some pick me girl she constantly feels the need to express shes not like the Aphrodite girls. and rick had to make it weird with aphrodite anyway by making them a whole stereotype of snobby boys and girls who love putting on makeup. they had drew, an asian girl & counselor of aphrodite, straight up mean to piper bc she likes jason. like for no other reason. drew only wants to participate and go on the quest because of jason. and other stereotypes like making leo, latine, be super flirty.

and lets really talk about how annoying annabeth was about the blondes are dumb stereotype because, girl we can talk about misogyny and people not letting you do things because of it, but lets also talk about how you are TWELVE, and the blonde stereotype is tired. i never liked annabeth, she was really tone deaf as someone whos half black. OH AND FRANK. they had this weird ass arc where they implied he was fat because of lack of confidence? like when he got confident he, lost weight... because of a blessing of mars? i dont even know.

like as i get older its more and more annoying to see it. i literally rolled my eyes when i saw rick talking about colorblind casting when people got mad about annabeth. he could of said anything else. how this could reconceptualize annabeth's arc around misogyny and now racism. and purposely alter her character to fit this new black annabeth. but no. people treat colorblind casting as a pinnacle of progressiveness.

[tsintotwo]

(Part 4/4)

(Earlier: Parts 1, 2, and 3)

Okay, finally getting to the 4th and last post talking about Tom Sturridge in his projects. There's not too much left to say as these are mostly cameos.

Vanity Fair (2004)- This was the first movie Tom was in as a grownup (edit: nope, this was the 2nd)- in period clothing (and looking like a million bucks, as you would suspect). Screentime: 2min. You can tell he's still finding his footing in all this. But he's got the it factor already.

Journey's End (2017)- Movie about Brit soldiers stuck in trenches waiting for death during WW2. Sam Claffin and Paul Bettany are in this and I recognized neither before seeing credits 🤦‍♀️ Anyway, Tom plays a bad soldier: drinks and girls are his forte, fighting- not so much. His character is in this movie to basically show the bone-chilling, hope-crushing, cruelly pointless side of wars. He uses his 3/4 scenes to drive that point home like a master. There's one super emotionally charged scene with Sam that sears into the mind- they both absolutely chew it up.

Song to Song (2017)- Tom being in this movie is just the most RANDOM thing in the world, guys. Song to Song is about the music industry and rockstar life, and Tom shows up for like 2mins to play Ryan Gosling's hometown farmland brother of all things??? Wut. 2 lines of dialogue. Cute hair, tho. Cute everything.

Hello Apartment (2018)- Slice-of-life short film about how we all leave our mark in the spaces we move through. Dakota Fanning made this and asked Tom to be in it- they've been friends since doing Effie Gray. Tom is MC's stormy bf- a bit of kissing, a bit of pouting, a bit of shouting. Worth it. (Aside: some STUNNING shots in this, kudos to Dakota). This is on youtube.

That's it, actually. Only movie of Tom's I haven't gotten to is Junkhearts (2011). It's on Amazon Prime for $4 which is worth it, but it seems like an intense movie and I'll take a break before trying to watch this one.

A significant part of Tom's career has been theater work. From what I've gathered, seems like he's done some phenomenal work there- both in UK and US. Got cool awards and noms. Of course, if your play isn't Hamilton, it doesn't get to be on any screen, so there's no way to see any of those now. The one I'm most gutted about is 1984 (2017) on Broadway. I love the og classic by George Orwell, and by all accounts this adaptation/interpretation was banging (AND controversial!). Tom playing a role like Winston Smith... I'd have loved it so fuckin much * screaming-into-pillow break*

How does Tom choose his projects?

"The first thing I’m drawn to is a piece of writing, to an author, to a director. Weirdly, it’s rarely a character. I want to work with people or with texts that push me and make me learn things that I think I can’t do. Because if I think I can do it, then I can’t surprise myself. And if I can’t surprise myself, then I’m definitely not going to surprise an audience." -Tom for Interview magazine, 2022

Why does he often do troubles characters?

"... I think what I’m attracted to is being able to explore a spectrum of emotion. It’s easier to find comedy in something sad than it is to find darkness in something funny. I can be all kinds of people when the darkness is there. Also, the first character I ever played onstage was a boy who murders all of his schoolmates [in Punk Rock]. I do think there’s something to be said by, “You get stuck in a gorge that you start with.” People have always gone, “Oh, yeah. He’s the fucked-up guy.” - same

Here's something about me: I love falling in love with men on silver screen. It's the only space where it's okay to be in love with a version of someone you made in your head because you're not going to know any other version. The only space you get to channel your feelings six ways to Sunday: write posts, write stories, draw, make any art- people will actually celebrate those (whereas try talking to your friend about a new irl crush for five days straight, on the sixth they'll smack you upside your head). The feelings are intense because these men are deliberately performing for you, the emotions forever unsullied because they're not gonna come hurt you (unless they're being cancelled lol). And they're all the finest specimens! So, yeah, I love it, and it happens periodically. What's rarer, tho, is that I get attracted to an actor's whole personality. I mean, like, all of these hot men are hella charming, and you can yassify almost anyone based on interview moments. But, idk, it doesn't always click with me, and I love a character, ship a couple, then move on. Tom, tho, is going to be one of those 2/3 permanent ones. I just find him interesting which to me, is the thing. (And also, he turned out to be one of those rare people in life who lets you know things about yourself that you didn't know before. Huh. Who knew?) And yeah, okay, he's very hot and insanely talented which started this whole intense phase but while this won't last, a genuine fondness and love will. He has a place in my heart forever. It's been such a good time discovering him that I'm legit grateful to the universe.

I'll do a bonus post with links to Tom interviews/vids/ stuff that are worth checking out. Until then, guys.

[blubushie]

its a book made by a fan about Hirohiko Arakis (author of jjba) influences (both how he used art and music and history in his work and what infouenced him as a manga artist) and boy howdy the book starts its 'what were arakis manga influences' FIFTEEN YEARS before Arakis even born. Insert 'japan post ww2 manga' rant here. Araki actually had a ton of trouble gitting gud at manga because he kept focusing on atmosphere and plot instead of character, which was super important especially for shonen manga (manga intended for young boys). He also has trouble developing his own style but compare a jojo to a typical anime man and you can tell hes fixed that problem~~ his first published work was Buso Poker which was a crazy mad short story about two outlaws playing poker in the wild west, but even then he knew he had to come up with something else quick bc like i said the characters had to be captivating in order to do well in shonen, but Buso Poker focuses more on anticipation and atmosphere than its unnamed characters. He had a few other way early works but i havent checked those out yet.

Each section of the book also has recommended songs for you to listen to and they are GREAT like as i started reading aboht Buso Poker (which takes place in the wild west) this cowboy-esque tune starts playing! And earlier as i read about japan just after ww2 this oldass kinda eerie japanese song starts playing, think something youd hear at a convenience store in 80s, except its a postapocalyptic dilapidated version of it played over a gankass intercom

Anyway yeah jjba is my special interest if you couldnt tell ^_^

Nodding intently

The song recommendations are incredible forethought and I wonder if he did what I do when I write LTB and just listened to certain songs on endless repeat until he finish writing/drawing the scene because it's the only song that catches the vibe of the scene, and then decided that since it matched the mood for him so well that maybe it'd set the atmosphere for his readers too.

(I did this with Blinding Lights by The Weeknd during the car scene in chapter 13 and with Oklahoma Smokeshow by Zach Bryan during the pub scene and with Unchained Melody by the Righteous Brothers during the hotel scene and with Sweet Caroline during the gift scene and–)

[eccentrickleptomaniac]

im gonna ask you to share your poland headcanons :]

WAHAHAHA ANNOOOOOOON THANK YOUUUU IVE WANTED TO TALK ABOUT HER FOREVER

ohwhere do i start... i suppose i'll talk about her personality first?

ok so let me set the record straight. she is a bitch. she's incredibly stubborn and once her mind is on something it's incredibly difficult to get her to change it, even if she knows its wrong. she enables the worst in people and rewards them for it. you know that one scene in angels in america where roy and belize are arguing about azt and roy starts hurling slurs at belieze and once belize does the same roy gives him the azt? yeah poland would do that. she will start fighting with anyone to bring them to their breaking point. it's a skill she learned while still in the same house with the bastard known as the ussr.

speaking of, she hates russia more than anyone. genuinely. it's actually kind of scary how far it goes. she pretty much allout refuses to speak with his friends and if she seems him, hoo boy you better be ready to hold her down. the hatred, i suppose its justified considering the.. how do i put this Hostile and imperial history between the two. i genuinely believe the last time the two ever had a positive interaction was during smolensk and even that was only because at first russia was the only one around to comfort her.

ok lets talk about her with closer friends.. while yes she fucking loves to push people's buttons when alone with someone she likes shes actually a very understanding and loyal person. she will actually listen to you rant about something you're passionate about for hours. if you are in trouble she will be the first to help you. however, if you look at her funny please know you've made an enemy for life. she holds long and petty grudges unapologetically.

speaking of pettyness, lets talk about the ussr and her relationship with him. i think about them a lot just because they hate eachother so much. completely genuinely i believe she only stayed in the warsaw pact for two reasons: to somehow destroy the ussr oh and also taking care of eg since shes still a teenager. im like, 99% sure the two got into arguments daily. they genuinely hate eachother more than anyone, and whatever the fuck perestroika didn't help. at best she was tolerant of him, at worst she was actively trying to kill him. she hates him for everything he stands for as well as his treatment of eg. despite her thing for long and petty grudges, she could tell that that girl could do no wrong from the start. the two have a very mother-daughter like relationship

she has both of her wings and they work just fine! although for a long time they didnt lol. i believe during ww2 they got fucked up during the destruction of warsaw (since that was pretty much the moment that armie krawoja lost its footing and poland became a guaranteed soviet puppet state after the war) and it took until her eventual leaving of the warsaw pact for them to be fully functional again. it's a fun little metaphor for freedom, i guess.

the cross she wears on her neck isn't actually because she's super religious. it was originally a small postwar act of spite against the soviet union, but eventually it kinda just became part of her outfit. she still isn't super religious, most countries arent due to their inherent personification of a whole ass landmass. unless it's like, the vatican or something JAJA

she is a hardcore alcoholic. it's, uh, not good, but it has quite literally been going on since pre-interwar. although she has gotten better with not downing like, 3 bottles of vodka in 1 sitting. she mostly just drinks beer at this point, unless she's like, really stressed for whatever reason. hey, old habits die hard. if i were being constantly harassed and assaulted by my neighbors i too would probably have some sort of addiction to a substance at this point. a random poland fun fact, the national drink is vodka.

her signature item (an item of which a country has associated themselves with and can now summon at will) is a hussar sabre as gifted to her by her father (the polish-lithuanian commonwealth). she cherishes it greatly and can use the sword quite well in combat. 10/10 would bring it to a gunfight.

due to her time spent in annexation for like, 100 years, she's pretty good at playing piano. on her spare time she'll play it rather leniently. admittedly, she doesn't have many hobbies. she sort of reads most of the day when not out with people.

wait how have i got this far without talking about her friends. she's good friends with the folk in the lublin triangle (lithuania (whos also her sister lol) and ukraine) and the visegrad group (czechia, slovakia, hungary) as well as all formerly in the eastern bloc. she would die for them and genuinely wishes nothing but the best for them. theyre also one of the few people who can actually tolerate her for long periods of time.

while it doesn't tend to show, she is very wary of france and britain specifically due to ww2. france especially, actually, considering the whole duchy of warsaw situation. for a long time she genuinely believed france was going to help her get her freedom. as you can see, that did not turn out, and nowadays the relationship between the two tends to be strained, only amplified by the russo-ukrainian war. she tends to interject on anything france is saying in an eu meeting with a sarcastic remark, especially if it's about war. she doesn't forget and she doesn't forgive.

uhhh i hope this suffices? i felt like this basically the entire time i was writing this

edit nope nvm im adding more i forgot to talk about interwar poland

ok so. interwar and postwar poland are basically two seperate people at this point. like, not literally, poland didnt fucking die in the war lol but personality and appearancewise they're completely different. as opposed to current poland's rather brash, loud, and belligerent personality, interwar poland was very quiet. he's much closer to that "fanon" poland. while, yeah he still was pretty fierce. it was much harder to get him to that point than it is now. he was pretty pacifistic all things considered.. he also at the time worked at a library doing archival things.. nowadays her job primarily consists of doing paperwork, which she doesn't mind all that much all things considered.

edit 08/08/23: her """"government assigned"""" username is probableLiability.

[owlrolls]

Top 3 engport AU's for your consideration and what I think about them

Nyotalia

- a classic, really

- the girls, just like their male counterparts, are super devoted to eachother

- they realized they were into eachtoher after years of "learning how to kiss" sessions with the other, something like:

"hey Joana,,,"

"mhm?"

"do you know how to kiss?"

"oh,, well,,-I I get the gist of it! I once had a human boyfriend y'know! "

"woah! So can you teach me?? :D"

"what"

"what"

- once my history teacher said that the biggest flaw the Portuguese have is jealousy, but, weirdly enough, I don't think Joana would do much when she sees Edith with other people, untiiiillll she realizes they're just friends

- she'd just give the death stare and hope for the best and cry a bit on the inside when people ask if she needs to use the restroom

- talking about jealousy, I think Edith would be more calm? Just like Joana maybe stare "👁️👁️" style but then once the chat is over she'd just ask who it is

- again, non-confrontational people

- they may have had less fights than the boys but when they had 'em, boy were they ugly

- during the ww2, Joana cut her hair really short to look like a man and to be accepted and respected around her peers and Edith let hers grow to look more feminine and appealing during her spionage days

- Joana's favorite thing on Edith is when she gets to ramble on something she likes and spends hours if not days remebering little details about the topjc

- Ediths is when Joana remembers little details she mentions during her ramblings, her favorite brand of perfume, why her favorite tea is the best, how many times her sisters had to get her out of the top of a tree like a scared cat because that apple just look THAT tasty, the look on her face when the alliance was signed and she spilled wine one her dress while celebrating

- 1000/10 incredible AU MWAH

Hetalia Gakuenl AU

- met at the paranormal club when Gabe had to get Vlad home because it was getting late and Romulus had forgotten him at school

- first interaction is a complete disaster:

"Guys this is my cousin Gabriel!"

"Hi."

"Hi"

"Oh, hey I know you from physics class, Lukas right?"

"Mhm"

"And you."

"ah shit"

"didn't you remind the English teacher about the test?"

"fucking hell."

"PFFTTT--"

"Vlad you traitor, you better sleep with an eye open"

- anyways, Gabe coming to the club to pick up his cousin is recurring theme, sometimes with his brother, sometimes with his other cousins

"Vlaaaad, your cousin's here"

"oh right, sorry guys!"

"wait."

"c'mere"

"mhm?"

"hey, um, is your cousin by any chance,,, into boys?,,"

"OH"

"SILENCE HEATHEN"

"..."

"yes or no"

"ask him yourself <3"

"motherfucker"

So there goes Tumblr sexyman, Arthur Kirkland:

"hey-"

"oh hi, what up ^^"

"do you wanna go out with me."

"I literally don't know you"

"👁️👁️.... 👁️👁️"

"yeah I do"

- the rest is up to your imagination, but it's just so sweet and friends to lovers (best trope) and cute UGHH ><

- 9.8/10

Coffee shop/Pub AU

- Barista Arthur and bartender Gabriel, name a better duo

- Arthur works at this silly little coffee shop owned by him and his brothers

- it's a cozy and comfortable 2 store space

- above is their home and below is the shop

- one day walks in Gabriel, looking as if he didn't sleep the last 4 days, asking for a tall black coffee, with sugar, steaming hot

"hey, are you sure, lad? We have other things that could help with whatever's going on with you"

"sighs nah, just.. Don't worry I'm fine with that, how much is it anyways?"

"1.50€"

"aight"

*slides a custard tart* "it's on the house"

- Gabe is very much surprised pikachu face.png

-later on to relieve stress from work Art goes to a pub

"gimme your strongest whiskey, one beer and a glass of vodka"

"you really need to get a hold of your nerves Arthur; gonna end up dead"

"pew pew!"

"sighs come on to the back, I'll take care of ya', it's on the house"

9.5/10 - so so good ^o^

[wisteria-songs]

A Fallout ramble but this time a headcanon about the general world. this has to do with world building and stuff.

So pre-war Fallout takes place in 2077, 132 years after WW2 when Atompunk is inspired and this world starts using nuclear energy. My headcanon is about the time between 1945 and 2077 mostly using the fashion as evidence and partially the music.

So we all know that fashion is evolving every day and there is no reasonable or possible way that the vintage styles has stayed with the entirety of America for 132 years. I think that the fashion adapted a lot like how real life did. I have two theories on how this could. have happened.

First one is around the time the in game war with Communist China and their allies was being threatened, the US once again put most of the resources into the military making the rest of fashion, regress into clothing that requires less resources meaning dresses and tighter clothing once again got popular.

My second theory for the change to vintage clothing styles is the US wanted to be able to control the people more and to make it easier they started with fashion, in dystopias you see a lot of the government controlling the fashion as part of controlling individuality.

Now the music in the fallout games. It would make sense that music from that era was preserved because they were all on records and the wastelanders found in tact records and found ways to play them on radio. Real world has a lot of our music on the internet instead of vinyls and records despite being able to buy them on those. I would assume it was the same once the fallout universe went to holotapes. The pre war modern music was lost because the lack of internet and holotapes not being accessible because I doubt that other than the super rare live terminal and the Pip-Boys in the post war world not a lot of things, like CDs and holotapes, would be able to be played even if they were found.

[thevillagegay]

Not My Wanda

crossposted to ao3

My brain has rotted to the point where I can actually write, so perish and enjoy:)

Peggy had gone through so, so much.

Being a woman in WW2. Being in the military. Being given the super soldier serum and being deemed a failure. Being stuck in the tesseract for 70 years. Yet among all of these hardships, there were small gems.

Like Wanda. Her wife. 

They had been married for 9 years. Wanda had gone through IVF to give birth to their boys. Their beautiful, beautiful boys. And now her wife was trying to kill her. 

Correction, not her wife. A variant of Wanda from another universe, one with no Peggy, a dead Vision(who in this universe was her friend), and boys that never really existed outside of her destroyed pocket of reality. 

Not her wife. A dream-walking and troubled woman with the same name and looks. The Scarlet Witch.

But oh how she acted just like her. The way she tilted her head in challenge before she made Black Bolts mouth disappear and tore apart Reed. Utterly horrifying, and yet scarily familiar. 

So it was all the more painful when she knew she would have to fight her wife, with no way other than Xavier to get the Witch out of her head. She could imagine her Wanda protesting violently at her body being used to kill the very people she had been to dinner with not two weeks before. The same people who had helped her through everything, being murdered by her own hands while she was powerless to stop it. This feeling only grew as Monica was thrown into the wall opposite her statue.

Reed had told her not to interact with her first, as this Wanda hadn’t had her. But now there was no choice other than death.

“Wanda, listen to me darling. I need you to stop. If you want the boys, just listen to me!” Peggy cried out desperately as her wife, no, the Scarlet Witch turned towards her. She held her shield to her side, showing she wasn’t a threat unless she needed to be, clutching the leather straps all the more tight as she pleaded with her eyes. 

“Darling? I must really mean something to you on this earth. Tell me, before I get the child, what are you to this Wanda?” The imposter knew already that they meant something to each other, she had seen the desperation in her eyes whenever she had dropped into the room. 

“Your wife. Mum to our boys. Please, please just stop. You don’t want this.” Peggy said, her voice cracking intermittently, tears threatening to fall. 

“Oh, you know exactly what I want. You should, you have it.” Wanda, the Witch, replied darkly, her tone dropping like the temperature in the room. All this woman wanted was her children, and she was willing to kill and take away from another version of herself to get.

“Please. What would the boys think? You know they would never look at you the same because of this. You just murdered the same men who took them to the movies yesterday on a play date with their best friends. You slammed their Auntie into a stone wall. You plan to take them away from their mom and kill their mummy. They won’t ever look at you lovingly, they will only see a monster.” Peggy finally let the tears fall as she whispered the last few words. She could see the way her opponent's hands faltered in her attempt to try and think of a way to defeat her. 

Hearing this had made the Witch stop in her tracks. She hadn’t thought of that before. She should have chosen a universe where they were still babies. Where she wouldn’t have to deal with their other families. One where she wouldn’t have to kill the woman she married in another universe. Despite this, she knew she wouldn’t get another chance to get her boys with Strange no doubt going to find a way to escape the Illuminati’s cells.

“I will deal with it. And you really think I can’t kill you, when I blew a hole through the head of the man I loved, and it meant nothing .” 

Peggy knew how she had to kill Vision in her universe. How it had been reversed by Thanos to retrieve the mind stone embedded in his head before she had been snapped. She had no idea how it would have affected her Wanda, but she was sure that was what caused the existence of her pocket reality in that universe. How she had gotten her boys was through grief, and that was how she was going to find them again.

[dungeonbf]

THANK U!!!! im so glad u like us this is literally like my friend approving of my relationship with probably the worst person ever… happy happy happy *dance*

ALSO THAT’S SO FUCKING FUNNY HELP he enlists ancap’s help & ancap is like “dw i got you ;)” and it’s the most OVER THE TOP, UNNECESSARY PERFORMANCE he has hired dancers, a blimp with a floating banner, fireworks, a cake, etc.. and this is probably like just some random day for chris lib so he comes to the front door and he’s just like “huh” and then there’s this big extravaganza & chris lib is like. “HUH” and auth right is like “hehe do you like it?” and chris lib is just overwhelmed & soooo.. “what. the fuck.” and auth right is like.. “…. Do you. like it?… do. you like me???” and chris lib is still trying to process things helppp

ALSO YOU AND AUTH RIGHT R SO SILLY.

him: can’t believe i’m here with you, you’re nothing more than a beta cuck. you: do you want you nails to be blue or black? him: … alternate colors on ever other finger. him: anyways people like you are what’s wrong with society—

he’s healing his inner little boy who probably wanted to wear nail polish & high heels… /hj i think he’d wear the scrooge pajama fit and i don’t know what kind of pajamas you wld wear but no matter it,, the pairing is funny. and chris lib wld wear like loose sports shorts & a sports jersey or just go shirtless (based, just like me fr)

omg this message is so long.. haven’t even gotten to the part where I scream abt an-accelerationism & anti-centrism.. to me it totally gives a leader & his right hand man…. a prince/king & his most loyal knight/advisor.. the dramatic dynamic is absolutely delicious. esp i imagine a sort of slow burn ish from them? qui is head over heels & wld do anything (out of love & admiration, qui’s not a fool in love but qui is dedicated) meanwhile anti centrism is more to himself but he comes to fall for an accelerationism .. like, he finds ways for them to come into contact & shifts talks to more like personal? not deep traumas but u know. and he’s probably liked an accelerationism for a while but now he like KNOWS it.. it’s always different realizing ur in love! but those r just my thoughts.. — @boykujou

IM GIGGLING THIS IS SO CANON AND REAL AND FACTUAL… i think auth right was the type of kid to obsess over littlest pet shop figurines but he’d make them roleplay like, ww2 and he’d insert himself into the war roleplay as this powerful leader. wait let me find what lps he’d be.

okay this is who he’d be. this is so authright coded

also you literally get our dynamic so well, i think an-acc tries to bring out the … nicer parts of blueman fr. i’m imagining they’re hanging out or something, some cheap horror flick playing in the background, and an-acc’s like, BEGGING to know who authright’s into, like “please please please you’re nothing please — so you want me dead?? you want me to die??” until authright finally caves. i’m a terrible wingman. whenever i see you two within 30 feet of each other, i’m loudly shouting tips on how he should ask you out.

also you’re so right about the scrooge pajamas, he even has the little hat and everything. i feel like he’s super particular about his pj’s, i think they’re like vintage from the 30’s and he treats them like a prized possession. handwashes them and everything. okay i’m basically rambling off authright headcanons but you get the gist.

also i know i’ve mentioned this before but i actually think he’s a sweetie pie when it comes to romance. authright’s obviously super traditional, so he’ll take you out on some nice dinner date and he’s so nervous because this man has never had any form of intimacy before in his life. he reaches over the table to put his hand on yours and he’s fucking SWEATING. anyways my thoughts: he craves affection. he is so touch starved (especially if you consider the ideologies’ ages as when their ideology first came into existence, this guy has been touch starved for like, a 100 years) please hold his hand and kiss his forehead, it could probably fix him i think.

AND GODDD you get it. that is literally me and anti-centrism. if you’ve ever watched “the office” and you see the boss, michael scott, and his assistant, dwight, and how hard dwight tries to impress michael every episode — that’s us. very very slow burn, except i’m plotting ways to pull him from day one. an-acc writes up lists of potential conversation topics just so qui can have something to talk to jrem about. i feel like they gradually get closer though as the centricide progresses and they end up hanging out and an-acc’s SO nervous, like visibly sweating and shaking. nearly throws up when anti-centrism offers quem his jacket. their entire dynamic is just “just some guy” and “whipped partner” like there is nothing super special about anti-centrism but an-acc’s wildly head over heels.

also as a gift for reading through all this, here’s a blueman edit

he is the most transgender cis man i’ve ever seen

[askadvancewars]

2013

This is a long rambling essay I wrote in 2013, musing how the prime antagonists are depicted in the first three Advance Wars games.

-

We have met the enemy and he is Foreign

boy I sure hope you like words

In first two Advance Wars game the mastermind behind Black Hole is a mysterious, robotic invader who first turned the countries against one another, and then moved on to stealing resources, all for the chance to dominate the world. In the third game, the mastermind is revealed to be an elderly CO whose conquest for the world comes one step after his conquest over death and old age, this time by stealing the land’s energy itself.

In the Japanese versions, their names were Hellbouze and Hellvolt. It may be a ‘war simulation’ game, but it’s supposed to be family-friendly cartoony kinda deal, so can’t use the word hell! Their names were changed to Sturm and Von Bolt. Sturm, the German word for storm, and Von Bolt–von which is “In German, von [fɔn] is a preposition which approximately means of or from”.

The bad guys are Germans, or at least, meant to evoke the image of the scary warmongering Germans.

When I was growing up in America in the 1950s, evaluating Hitler’s commanders was all very simple: all Germans were Nazis, and all Nazis were evil. The higher in rank a Nazi rose, the lower he sank as a human being. …His favorite hobbies were mass murder, bombing undefended villages, and eating small babies for breakfast. -Hitler’s Commanders, preface

Really just musing here but it was kinda popular to paint vaguely European characters as the enemy, Germans and Russians especially, because of the world wars or threats of wars. What comes to mind is the Baroness from GI JOE and the von Karmas from Ace Attorney. Zangief’s speech from Wreck It Ralph also comes to mind, but as fans would adamantly point out, he isn’t really a bad guy. Bison-look-at-my-vaguely-Nazi-uniform maybe a better example. My-name-is-German-for-piano and Franziska aren’t strictly bad guys, but they’re definitely antagonists to the protagonists of their games. Look at Manfred and Kristoph, though. It’s worth noting, that, I think Franziska and Manfred were supposed to be Americans in the Japanese version?

Back to Advance Wars. The German influence in Black Hole is not unprecedented. Flak wears some sort spiky version of the Stahlhelm. Max rescues POWs who were afraid of Lash’s experiments on them. Sturm seems intentionally designed, to evoke, again the scary image of the Schutzstaffel.

Let’s take a quick look at the faction that’s based on WW2 Germany: Green Earth

But first this:

In Famicom Wars, the two warring factions are between Red Star and Blue Moon. You apparently can use (secret???) COs but I don’t know how to do that. In Super Famicom Wars, Red Star and Blue Moon returns, alongside their respective COs, Yuan Delta and Rojenski (basing the names on the advancewars.net site because no official translations). Delta and Rojenski are stated to be bitter rivals. Even the opening of the game is a throwback to the Famicom Wars opening where Red Star and Blue Moon try to blow each other up.

Also, take a gander at that Black Hole edits. Pretty cute.

Left to right: Yuan Delta, Rojenski, Fon Rosso, Hetler, Caroline, Billy Gates and Mr. Yamamoto. Caroline, Billy and Yamamoto aren’t attached to any particular factions. They’re also the Super COs of the game. There are no CO powers yet in the game, but the latter three specialize in luck, extra funds and extra strong units respectively.

(billy gates broken as hell pass it on)

Gameboy Wars has Red Star and White Moon fighting but I don’t really know what’s going on with that game so 

-

In Advance Wars, Red Star and Blue Moon continue their rivalry, with Nell facing Olaf. I read on a wiki that Red Star was changed to Orange Star to possibly avoid communism associations. Here we have another case of name changing, from Catherine to Nell, and Whip to Olaf.

Another note: I’ve seen on Japanese fansites having to clear up the issue who and where the games are made. They were made by Intelligent Systems and they’re Japanese games, but the first two Gameboy Wars Advance were only released in 2004, together in one pak. AW1 and AW2 were released in 2001 and 2003. I’ve seen pictures of Japanese fans importing the English versions just so they could play them.

This also brings up the issue of translations and design. If you’ve noticed the first game had markedly different CO designs for Mop, Whip, Asuka and Kikuchiyo, but in Japanese AW2, their designs seem to take cues from the first game’s internationally released version–Mop loses the pirate outfit, Olaf gets a more military Russian uniform, Kikuchiyo loses the armor, Asuka gains a cover (hat). Billy’s hat is unchanged.

-

So we’ve got name changing. Catherine is probably a reference to the preceding game’s lucky blonde CO Caroline, but got changed to Nell. Wikipedia tells me Olaf is a proto-Germanic name but it’s a name most strongly associated with Russia. The story is Orange Star and Blue Moon were bitter rivals, but only now has hostilities started up again. Olaf was once part of Orange Star but betrayed them. Olaf is a commanding officer most comfortable with snow.

INTERESTINGLY, while Red/Orange Star is ostensibly based on the USA, the main players of the game would be You/The Advisor and a young boy named Andy. Ryo in Japanese. Which is a Japanese name. From Japan. DOUBLE INTERESTINGLY, the Battle Maps shopkeeper is named Hachi. Who keeps his name throughout. Also ostensibly Japanes. TRIPLE INTERESTINGLY, the character designer for the first three Advance War games? Ryo Hirata. HMMM. COINCIDENCE???Probably. But making things for a Japanese audience, they probably wanted a Japanese-sounding main character as well. For most the campaign, you can get to play as Domino (Sami) and Max (Max).

-

Skip ahead

I was supposed to be talking about Green Earth

Let’s look at their names in Japanese: Eagle, Mop, Hannah, and Bittmann

And their names in English: Eagle, Drake, Jess and Javier

Mop was probably changed for the same reason as Whip, that it might’ve sounded too silly in a children’s war game. Hannah, I think was changed for the same John was turned to Jake, to make her sound 'cooler’. On yet another sidenote, it’s spelled differently, but in naming her Hannah, maybe they were also alluding to 'hana’, flowers? I think the point, if anything, was to give the tank-riding CO with masculine attributes deliberately 'soft’ name, much like her liking dandelions.

Bittmann. An ostensibly German name. Well, Jewish-German last name, if I remember prior research. It gets turned to Javier, the Spanish spelling of Xavier. His whole deal is steeped medieval knighthood and chivalry, but maybe by changing his name, the allusion slightly shifts from Landsknecht (look at his armor, LOOK AT IT) to images of Spanish knights. Specifically Don Quixote, a spoof on chivalric Romances. 

Or maybe Bittmann just sounded too weird, and Javier is nicer. Maybe naming him Alonso, Miguel or Cervantes would probably have too on point?

-

You know, how much I love Javier, the first time I played Dual Strike? There are some parts of me that wished that they toned down Javier’s 'funny foreigner' shtick, mostly with some of CO powers lines.

Yet I loved every moment with Jake. Go figure.

-

As the country kinda based on Germany, how is Green Earth treated over the course of the games?

In the first game, Green Earth is introduced by fighting a roaming independent battalion led by a 'tough-as-nails’ pilot named Eagle. He recognizes Andy and yells at him for something he’s done–which is attack Green Earth. He and Drake find out the truth, and then he lends his hand to set things right.

In the second game, Green Earth is on the verge of defeat at the hands of Hawke. Eagle is mad of course. Introducing the new friend: JESS! Eagle yells at Jess, who then yells at them, and Drake yells at them both. Also yelling at Hawke how he’ll never forgive Hawke for what he did to Green Earth. There’s a lot of yelling. Also some other stuff, but I’ll get to that some other time.

In the third game, Jess teams up with a knight named Javier–Green Earth is joining with the rest of the Allied Nations but not before they battle! Yellow Comet is sad that they have to fight friends. Orange Star gives Yellow Comet the evil eye. Blue Moon chuckles, thinking “haha for once they don’t fight US”.  Green Earth introduces the Megatank. Jake yells excitedly. It’s also implied that the new Stealth units are also  Green Earth’s doing–well, an Allied Nations thing–but Green Earth is the group that quips during the loss dialogue. Jake isn’t as excited, “tanks tho”.

CONCLUSION:

“This is why Green Earth is a military power. We must get them on our side.” - Sasha 

 "If they can make a monster tank like that, Green Earth must be a freaky place.“ - Jake

"They built this monstrosity for a reason–to stop us from taking another step. They’ve got money and nerve, too. If only Drake and the flyboy were here…” - Jess

“I’m getting angrier by the moment!” - Eagle

-

To bring this 'round home, so Sturm and Von Bolt got scary sounding German names. A German last-named CO got his changed to a Spanish first name. Flipside, Two Yellow Comet COs had their Japanese names changed to Western ones: Asuka and Kouzou to Sonja and Grimm. Sonja is a name can be found in many variations in many countries…such as Germany. Grimm is also an international name, but mostly associated with Germany and the Brothers Grimm. Why they chose to change change the Japanese names of the Japanese-inspired country, I can’t figure out. They must have a good reason at the time. Just interesting to note that German names in this game aren’t necessarily villainous.

Tune in next time as I tackle exciting issues such as depictions of Hawke and Koal as COs, the role of women in the series, the themes of Dual Strke and analyzing Green Earth chain of command 

haha just kidding no I won’t

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

I'm an American reading your Boris Johnson posts which I think are so interesting and hilarious. I don't know a lot about UK politics and was wondering if you wouldn't mind doing a quick rundown of the Torys and labour parties (mostly bc I want to read your version) but if you don't have the time or inclination I will do my own research! Thank you!

Sure! Okay this is SUPER BRIEF, like I cannot stress enough how brief this is but:

Labour

The red ones. So Labour began in the early 1900s at the point when a lot of workers rights and voting reforms and all that stuff was gathering steam as we moved out of the Industrial Revolution. It was basically a bunch of socialists, trade unionists and others. Then after the last Liberal government in 1923 which was a bit of a disaster, they took over as the main alternative party to the Tories, and have held that position ever since.

Their most notable era was after WW2, where they created a metric fuckton of nationalised infrastructure - the NHS, rail, water, national parks and countryside access rights, etc. At that point there were two generations massively scarred and traumatised by war who had fought for the country, and now wanted the country to take care of them in return. That was the prevailing attitude of the working class of the day, and Labour (PM was Clement Atlee, but the NHS was the brainchild of Welsh boy Aneirin Bevan, he's a good boy is our Nye) cashed in.

Second most notable era, though, was the late 90s - Tony Blair. Our Tony was of Tory stock but changed his mind because he loves Poors. He decided that, to get a Labour government again, the party needed to be more moderate to convince voters, so he should create the more right-leaning New Labour. This has dramatically shrunk the Overton window and moved Labour to the centre-right. It worked - he was the one who took us to war in Iraq, supposedly for those pesky WMD that never seemed to materialise, but like, a few years ago he went on a bland daytime TV chat show and Fern Britton asked him if he'd have done it anyway even without the rumour of WMDs and he said yes. So, uh. There's that. It was all very dramatic, and journalists started demanding to know how this TV presenter had wrung such a confession out of him, and she was like "Well... I don't think anyone had actually asked him before." He’s a full on war criminal, anyway.

And then, recently, we had Jeremy Corbyn in charge. He was remarkable because he's actually a left-of-centre politician, though fairly unremarkable by those standards, but the Overton window is such that everyone promptly accused him of being a communist for saying we should have free internet. In the 2019 General Election he produced a fully-costed manifesto for new public services, and the Tories just said the words "We don't have a magic money tree to pay for all of this, guys, look at our manifesto in which we promise stuff without explaining where the money will come from," and that actually worked because British people are criminally fucking stupid. Meanwhile the Labour party itself hated Corbyn so much it kept trying to ban new members who wanted to vote for him in a really quite dazzling display of corruption. The BBC let a Tory donor publicly announce that Corbyn was an antisemite because he was pro-Palestine, and then that fell into hysteria and became a whole thing on all sides, and then after the General Election he stood down as party leader and Labour promptly kicked him out of the whole party. The whole thing was honestly an absolute fucking shitshow.

Now we have Keir Starmer, ex-lawyer. Sometimes he does okay, but mostly he has all the oppositional abilities of an ice cream wafer.

The Tories

The blue ones. So the Tories are older than Labour by a considerable margin. The original party to have the name (it's Irish and means "outlaw/robber") were a bunch of tedious royalist dickhead Jacobites who wanted to stick with the system of Let The King Rule in the late 1600s, at the point when Let The King Just Be a Figurehead was now the system. In the 1800s they became the Conservatives and Unionists, and then the modern Conservatives around WW1, but oddly and appropriately the Tory nickname has still stuck.

Anyway they are very right-wing, and really rose to power during both world wars. Churchill was a Tory, and he did such wonderful things as sending in the British army against striking Welsh coal miners, and intentionally causing a famine in India during WW2 so the supplies would come to Britain instead. Classy lads. In the 70s/80s Margaret Thatcher took over, and spent her time aggressively undoing all the socialist stuff that Labour did by privatising water, rail, etc, and beginning the sell-off of the NHS. She also decided she hated British working class industry, including the coal mines, and so shut them all down without remotely trying to replace them. This has done untold damage to the working class and poor areas of the UK, chief among them Wales, where two thirds of the working population worked in the mines. We now have areas where unemployment is in the fourth generation, and entire ghost towns in the countryside. Plus, she was BFFs with Reagan, which should tell you all you need to know about the rest of her tenure.

In the modern day, they took over just after the recession under David Cameron, who promptly instigated austerity measures that have dramatically widened the gap between rich and poor and crippled the economy. David Cameron was also revealed to have fucked a pig once while in uni. He held the Brexit referendum to try and convince people to keep him in charge because he thought we’d vote remain, and then when we didn’t, he promptly quit so he wouldn’t be held accountable for the fall out. Theresa May took over and tried to produce a Brexit deal, but couldn’t, because it was literally impossible to get the deal that Brexiteers had promised, so no one liked her offerings. She was voted out via vote of no confidence. Boris Johnson took over and legit tried to force through a No Deal Brexit, which would have destroyed the country but made him a billionaire, and he even tried to shut down Parliament to stop people from blocking him. Fortunately, that was considered illegal, so he had to back down and get a deal.

And he did! It’s way worse than Tessie May’s, but it was, by then, the best option available. Now Brexiteers think he’s a hero who can do no wrong.

And then the pandemic happened, in which he mis-managed it so badly Britain has the second worst death/infection rate in the world, and then... Partygate. And we’re caught up!

Others:

The Liberal Democrats. The yellow ones. The third choice. In theory socially left-wing, financially right-wing, but in practice they’ve been a bunch of tedious power-grabbing turds. Under the leadership of Nick Clegg they entered into a coalition with the Tories and David Cameron a few years back and basically sold out every principle they had, and therefore kind of... provided a buffer against the worst Tory excesses while also enabling other worst Tory excesses, to be honest. No one trusts them anymore, but they are suddenly stealing Tory seats in by-elections throughout the land, because hardcore Tory voters would never go Labour but they MIGHT vote yellow.

Greens. About the only true left wing party available in England specifically, because an English nationalist party (right-wing) is a very different thing to a Celtic nationalist party (left-wing). They have a single MP, I believe, but in areas with a strong following they do have good sway. Primarily environmental, very socialist.

UKIP. Nazis. Only cared about Brexit. Then Brexit happened and it turned out they didn’t actually have a plan for it. They have since lost all their voters, pretty much, it’s very funny. Their leader has never actually managed to get elected to MP.

SNP. The Scottish National Party, and I believe the ruling party in Scotland. They seem tidy enough. Generally left-wing, though not so much about the military, weirdly. Led by Nicola Sturgeon overall (who seems pretty cool, although with the usual politician caveats and also the addendum that I know little about Scottish politics in detail), but their leader in Westminster is Ian Blackford, who has been yelling at Boris Johnson about parties a lot.

Plaid Cymru. The Welsh nationalists! Easily the most left-wing party in Wales - only the Greens really give them any trouble there, and Plaid are actually a little further left. Very socially progressive. They have a fair bit of influence in the Senedd (Welsh Parliament) but are not actually the ruling party. Used to be led by Leanne Woods, who is fab, and was the only person before the last election to tell Nigel Farage on TV that he should be ashamed of himself during a leaders’ debate. Now led by Adam Price, the Westminster leader is Liz Saville Roberts.

DUP. Democratic Unionist Party. A Northern Irish party which, as the name suggests, is pro-Britain and pro-union, very socially conservative. I will not go further into detail here because we really aren’t far from the Troubles (I’m old enough to have grown up with car bombings being a not-uncommon news item) and it’s very, very complicated and I am not Northern Irish, so I’ll leave it there. Currently led by Jeffrey Donaldson. 

Sinn Féin. Irish Republican and democratic socialist party, in both Ireland and Northern Ireland, and the opposite number of the DUP; and again, I will leave it there, as I am very much the wrong person to go into those details. In fact they only had one seat fewer than the DUP in the 2017 election, so it’s hotly contested. Generally left leaning I believe, but with some big exceptions like the topic of abortion. Led by Mary Lou McDonald.

There are also a shit ton of others, like, but those are probably the main ones to be honest. But, like America, it’s really a two-horse race in Westminster.

(I should also add that the Celtic nations are all partially devolved to a greater or lesser extent, which adds quite a bit of complexity.)