#i'm SUPER tempted to not even read most of the fics in question bc girl the cringe is both real and unbearable! the summaries r bad enough

[kenobihater]

i am this close to orphaning five of my dusty old ass star wars oneshots, and one longfic i abandoned after the 1st chapter. i've only orphaned one work in my life before, a haikyuu fic i wrote at like 14 or 15 which sucked major dick and balls and i don't regret doing so at all tbh. i'm still somewhat hesitant bc ik some ppl might still like my sw writing and want more of it?? but i'm SO goddamn tempted bc it's not like they'll be deleted and i'm absolutely 100% over a lot of these works and don't even like seeing them on my page or rlly want them connected to me. like, i'm grateful i wrote and posted them bc it helped me improve my craft and the feedback grew my confidence, but it's to the point where i cringe whenever i get an email notif in my inbox concerning kudos or comments on them bc being reminded of their very existence annoys the hell out of me when i've objectively improved over years of practice ughhh

[celestie0]

Girl I was balls deep in my attempt to make fanart for u a couple months ago

Like I had the reference pictures collated and I sat my ass down and picked up an pencil with the intention of actually drawing something after ages

cause basically I became a lil sad cause I felt like I forgot to draw bc last year in school I took an external art subject and it didn’t occur to me that doing a hands on subject through distance study wasn’t the brightest idea

anyway that fucked me over and led to me dropping and taking up fucking legal studies 😭

Even though I’m a bit more STEM based I can still fw the wordy subjects but not this someone pls save me why am I being assessed on the bi cameral structure of parliament

saur yh I’m super lazy as is with anything so that situation just put me off drawing and art completely

congrats to me setting every world record for yip yapping and going off track

ummm yh for context it was like my 10th read through of the kickoff chapter 6 scene that compelled me to collate a bunch of reference pics that ranged from twitter smut comics to bathroom sinks and eventually I gave up because anatomy is a bitch

I changed into a dress with the same type of neckline I think reader was wearing bc of the way it tucks under her boobies and I was this close to just shamelessly positioning myself in front of the mirror to make my own references

then ofc I got distracted by a half baked portrait of Rose from titanic that I drew when I was like 15 and ended up drawing a two hour long remake of the same picture

only for my friend to tell me it looks like Mary Shelly’s ghost

Should I know who that is

To be fair it looked nothing like her but I mean it was an improvement from thinking all my ability just went poof and I drew better when I was 15

never the less I was somewhat disappointed with the product and I haven’t drawn since

wait I wanna show u actually lemme try

https://share.icloud.com/photos/0edTRG9Tb54pRh9Qe5unszRrg

the Mary Shelly in question

do these links work I’m scared I’m gonna accidentally leak personal details or my whole camera roll lol

also IM NOT AN ARTIST don’t judge me peeps I’m just a girl idek how to drive yet

I feel bad every time I send an ask I feel like I’m force feeding u Ellie babes u have the patience and commitment of a saint

also OMG IF YOU MADE ART FOR ANY OF MY FICS I’D SOB!!!!

I want to 😞🫶 but alas prospect of fanart from me will most likely never see the light of day

that crack scene in ihm was tempting tho everything u write is just so visual

♥️ mwah my gorgeous gorgeous writer wifey

hellooo my dear PLS the ramble of this ask is legendary and i found it very entertaining xD

ouuu the dress that reader wears in ch6 of kickoff is actually based on a dress that i own, here's some pictures of it!! i'm curious if the dress you have is similar!! but yea this is the official outfit reference hahah

looking at it now it's kind of a mild sweetheart neckline lol n yea def tucks under the boobs very nicely xd i was actually gonna sell it on depop a couple months ago when i did a closet cleanout but i was like nahhh i gotta keep it bc it inspired that scene

taking your OWN reference pictures sounds so badass. and its ok babe it's the thought that counts haha <3 i feel u about the losing passion/talent in art thooo aaa i used to draw too but ehh hobbies fizzle

ahh i can't see the cloud photos :(( but anywho thanks for the yap my dear!! i ate it up. also side note but i'm so glad my writing comes off visual to you!! i always worry there's not enough description in my scenes so that's reassuring to hear. much love!