#i'm a rabid dog i need to be beaten to death with a stick

[capitateoftheherald]

for the past few days i've only really been out of bed to eat and use the bathroom because i'm having a mental illness moment (active suicidal ideation; neither method i'd choose is available to me though). been smoking wayy too much as a result. most of my time is spent maladaptive daydreaming.

had a conversation with a guy i used to be friends with (and had a crush on) and i'm So So Clearly Still Down Bad. he was texting me and i would smile stupidly at the careful way he phrased his messages and the LENGTH !! a chatty cathy. but i need to meet up with him in person to unmix my feelings on the matter.

However. because of the mental illness moment i am Wary. i feel not really like myself & i'm struggling to differentiate between bpd and Normal emotions & i don't wanna do some dumb weird shit in regards to him and fuck it up and hurt him somehow !

it's a strange feeling to simultaneously desperately desire someone and desperately wish to die. like YES i wanna smash and YES i wanna cuddle but also YES the thought of any kind of future is impossible to me currently so it wouldn't really feel fair to drag you into it. idk. i hate trying to navigate this stupid dumbfuck brain

edit: okay i'm realizing that part of my mixed feelings is because i am terrified that if i'm too genuine with him he'll leave again. and i am like PLS god do not leave i do not have another friend near enough to me rn. which is a little hilarious because i am the one that got hurt in the first place so He should be the nervous one if he's interested in rekindling a friendship.. get on your hands and knees and beg boy. apologize harder or whatever. need to keep reminding myself of this i think.

[communist-hatsunemiku]

i have a genuine question, im not american and i dont really know your politics other than currently its trump vs biden but like. what are americans supposed to do this election?

cause afaik your system is basically a 2 party system at this point, not because other parties cant be elected but because not enough people vote for them to make votes worth being cast for them. like if you vote green youre tossing your vote out.

if biden is horrible, and trump is comically horrible, and no other parties can safely be voted for, then what are people supposed to do in the election? feel free to delete this or whatever but im just genuinely curious because from an outsiders view biden does *seem* like the lesser evil (dont get me wrong hes still evil), but also if you suggest voting blue then thats also apparently wrong

I'm probably not the best person to answer this, but I'll give it a shot.

The entire two party system in the US is an illusion, it's this facade they keep up to make people think we are a democracy. One of the two-party systems main functions, to me, is keeping people convinced that we can vote our way to any real systemic change. That voting is the only *real* way things should change, and this idea is so incredibly damaging to getting people to actually do something other than checking a box every four years. These fuckers in charge are banking on people believing in this system, fully buying into it is playing directly into their hands.

Direct action, collective action is what is going to create meaningful, substantial change. The protests in support of Palestine are an example, people blocking ships transporting weapons, people superglueing their hands to pavement to stop the macys parade, people attacking and vandalizing weapons manufacturer's facilities, flooding government offices with phone calls so that the phone doesnt stop ringing. These are just a few examples that are infinitely more meaningful than someone screeching "vote blue no matter who". And I'm really just pulling on recent events, I'm sure there is someone who can elaborate on what true direct action really looks like and lay it out more clearly.

I don't think me writing in Hatsune Miku on my ballot is like, radical or actually going to do anything. My conscience however forbids me from voting for someone who has consistently shown again and again that everything he says is a lie, everything he does is in service of capitalism and fascism, and everything he represents is everything I hate about this country. Joe Biden is a rabid dog who needs to be beaten to death with a stick, and frankly he's getting off easy with that in my opinion.

[capricorn-0mnikorn]

I'm pretty sure that 'beaten to death with a stick' thing was derived/dogwhistled from North Korean propaganda, but at any rate I wouldn't recommend getting in blunt-wood-thing range of anything rabid *or* Bezos right now. Pike range, *maybe*.

(This is in response to this post, about Jeff Bezos thinking about buying up movie theater chains)

Good point. Or maybe the more humane way to kill a rabid dog, which is to lock them in a closed room, and pump it full of carbon monoxide. Cruelty is not needed if all we aim to do is control a danger to public health.