#i'm havin a rough time so please be patient with me while i get my feet underneath me again

[losingmymindtonight]

Whumptober: Unconscious

AN: Whumptober is just me seeing how quickly I can write something. It’s not quality, nor is it quantity, but it sure is fic. That’s about all I’ve got in me.

--

The alert went off just after 3:00 am.

Which was, as a general rule, not one of Tony’s favorite times to get alerts.

“Boss,” F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s voice startled him from his hyperfocus on the exposed circuitry in front of him, “I have detected strange anomalies in Peter Parker’s vitals.”

He looked up in surprise. “What time is it?”

“3:03 am.”

He blinked. “And why the fuck is the kid in the suit at 3:00 am? It’s a school night. His curfew is 11:00.”

“Mister Parker is not in the suit. My readings are coming from the biotech in his watch.”

Okay. That… that wasn’t exactly ideal.

“What are the anomalies?”

“Mister Parker’s heart rate is unusually elevated and his blood oxygen levels appear to be rapidly decreasing.”

Did the kid go on patrol without his suit? Tony was going to kill him. “Where is he?”

“In his bed.”

Wait, what?

“Are you… are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“What the fuck? F.R.I.D.A.Y., track his phone.”

There was a pause as the AI completed the request. Then,

“It appears to be on the table beside his bed, Boss.”

“Call him. Now.”

“Of course.”

The sound of the phone ringing filled the lab. Tony pushed away his project. He had more important things to worry about now.

The phone kept ringing.

And ringing.

And ringing.

Your call has been forwarded to an automated voice messaging system. Peter Parker is not available. At the tone, please record your message. When you finish recording you may hang up, or press 1 for more-

“Push the call through, FRI.”

“Yes, Boss.”

There was a brief rush of static, and then quiet.

If he listened really, really hard, he could just barely make out the sound of someone breathing.

“Peter?” The kid must be asleep (or unconscious), because there wasn’t any answer. He tried again, louder. “Peter!”

He heard the rustle of sheets, then a huff of confusion.

“Mis’er St’rk?”

“Thank god, you’re alive. You had me wondering there for a minute.”

“Huh? Where’re you?”

He blinked. “Try your phone, bud.”

“Wha’? Why’re you in my ph’ne?”

No, no, no, no, no. The spark of concern that had settled at the sound of the kid’s voice lit right back up, bright and sharp. This was a serious step above you-just-woke-me-up-and-I’m-still-half-asleep confusion. This was… that was something much, much worse.

“I-I’m not. I called you, Pete.”

“Called me?”

“Mhm. Are you alright? F.R.I.D.A.Y. says your vitals went wonky and you seem… a little out of it.”

There was a beat of silence.

“I don’ feel good.”

He sat up straighter on the bench, hands clenching with fear. He’d known something was wrong before, but hearing the kid admit it only gave purchase to the panic. “What do you mean?”

“Feel weird.”

“Define weird.”

“Dunno. Head hurts. Feel sick.”

Tony blinked. “FRI? Does he have a fever?”

“No, Boss. Although Mister Parker’s O2 levels are dropping low enough to be an imminent concern.”

He leapt to his feet. A little early morning trip to Queens wouldn’t kill him. Who needed sleep, anyway? “Pete? I’m coming over, okay? Can you get up and wake May?”

“Not here.”

“May isn’t there?”

“No. Graveyard shift.”

“Okay. Okay. That’s alright. I’m gonna come take care of you. Just keep talking to me.” The suit folded around him and F.R.I.D.A.Y. flipped the call to his heads up display without being prompted. “Do you feel like you’re gonna throw up?”

“Mhm.”

“If you need to, just do it. I’ll clean it up later.”

“M’kay.”

“Good boy.” He rushed out onto the roof and shot into the air. He was so hasty in his takeoff that he had to quickly correct his trajectory with his thrusters, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. “Did you feel sick before you went to sleep?”

“No.”

“Are you sure?”

“Mhm.”

“Alright.” He muted himself and finally let the panic seep through his voice. “F.R.I.D.A.Y.? What the fuck is wrong with him? Is it the flu?”

“The flu does not usually involve such a rapid drop in oxygen levels.”

“Then what’s wrong with him?”

“My sources indicate-”

“Those sources better not be WebMD.”

“They are not.” If Tony didn’t know any better, he would’ve thought that F.R.I.D.A.Y. sounded offended. “As I was saying: my sources indicate that Mister Parker is likely suffering from a drug allergy. However, it is also possible that the symptoms are the precursor to an epileptic episode or a brain hemorrhage.”

“Why the fuck would he have a brain hemorrhage?”

“Considering Mister Parker’s age, state of health, and activity level, the most likely cause would be trauma. Until I can run a more in-depth scan, your best course of action would be to continue assessing his mental status.”

He switched his audio back on, nodding as if F.R.I.D.A.Y. needed his confirmation. “Hey, buddy. You still with me?”

“Mhm.”

“Good job. Hey, I have some questions to ask you, and it’s really important that you answer them honestly. I swear I won’t get mad.”

“M’kay.”

“Did you go on patrol earlier? Without the suit?”

“No.”

“Do you promise?”

“Mhm.”

“So no injuries I should know about?”

“No.”

“Did you take medicine before you went to sleep? Ibuprofen? Anything?”

“No.”

“Are you absolutely sure?”

“Mhm.”

“Alright. Have you ever had a seizure, Pete?”

“Wha’?” That question seemed to wake the kid up a bit. “No. Why?”

“I’m just checking. How do you feel?”

Peter seemed to contemplate that for a second.

“‘M... ‘M really tired, Mis’er Stark.”

“No. Nope. Stay awake, okay? I don’t know what's wrong with you yet.”

“Somethin’s wrong wi’ me?”

This is wrong. This is so, so wrong. “Yeah, buddy. You told me you didn’t feel good. Remember?”

“Mm. Oh, yeah. I really don’ feel good.”

“I know. I’m,” he glanced at the ETA F.R.I.D.A.Y. helpfully threw up on the screen, “I’m three minutes away from you. Hang on.”

“M’kay.”

There was something impossibly frightening about having something wrong with Peter and not knowing what. He’d had to get used to the idea of the kid getting hurt on patrol, rolling into the Tower clutching a bleeding wound or a broken bone. It was an uncomfortable truth, but one he’d learned to assimilate into his life.

But this… this was exponentially more frightening. This was something happening to Peter, not Spider-Man. He could sew up bullet wounds and cast broken bones. He couldn’t fix something he couldn’t even diagnose.

God, he hated being stuck in the dark.

“Can you tell me more about what’s wrong, kiddo?” Honestly, he didn’t really expect to learn anything useful. He was just trying to keep Peter as lucid as possible until he could get there. “What feels bad?”

“Head.”

“Your head hurts?”

“Mhm.”

He could see Peter’s apartment complex now. Every inch closer made his heart rate climb. “Anything else?”

“Dunno. ‘M just… tired.”

“Alright. Remember what I said, though, right? No sleeping.”

“No sleepin’.”

“That’s it. Good boy.” He landed on the fire escape outside Peter’s room with the discordant clatter of metal on metal. It was loud enough to be unwanted at 3:00 in the goddamn morning, but Tony couldn’t bring himself to care. “I’m here, bud.”

“Took a long time.”

Don’t I know it, kid.

He ended up climbing through the window into Peter’s room. There was a part of him that nearly went into the main entrance and took the elevator to the apartment (May had given him a spare key, so he could’ve just let himself in), but the half-panicked ball of worry in his chest convinced him otherwise.

“Pete?”

The lump on the bed shifted. “Mis’er Stark?”

He rushed to the kid’s side, metal-clad knees knocking into wooden floors as he knelt beside the low-slung mattress. “Hey, squirt. Told you I was coming.”

Suddenly, an alert, red and flashing and impossible to ignore, exploded onto his heads up display.

WARNING: DANGEROUS LEVELS OF CARBON MONOXIDE DETECTED DO NOT REMOVE HELMET INITIALIZING OXYGEN RESERVES OXYGEN RESERVES INITIALIZED

He froze in realization. 

“F.R.I.D.A.Y.?”

“Mister Parker’s symptoms match those of carbon monoxide poisoning, although it is notoriously difficult to diagnose without context. There is likely a leak somewhere in the building.”

“What do I-”

“It is advised to remove Mister Parker from the contaminated area and into fresh air as quickly as possible. I have notified emergency services. They should arrive within five minutes to assist the other residents.”

At some point during his hurried conversation with F.R.I.D.A.Y., Peter’s eyes had fallen shut. He didn’t move when Tony pressed his gauntlet against his shoulder. He shook him, first gently and then with more vigor, and the kid just stayed limp.

“Pete?” Nothing. Shit. “Alright. Don’t worry about it, kiddo, I’ve got it handled.” He tore Peter’s comforter away in a manner that definitely did not denote I’ve got it handled, but he supposed it didn’t really matter when Peter was unconscious. “I’m gonna pick you up now, okay? We’re going on a little trip.”

Peter offered no resistance when Tony scooped him up. And, fuck, the kid was heavy. Sometimes it was easy to forget that the kid was 5’8” of pure muscle.

Pure muscle that was now a complete deadweight.

Great.

He clambered onto the fire escape with a lot more grace than he’d really expected. Then again, he had the added motivation of not wanting to jostle the precious cargo cradled to his chestplate. As he went, he found himself babbling nonsensically to the kid.

“It’s all gonna be fine. I’m gonna take you back to the Tower and pump you full of oxygen. That’ll be nice, yeah? And I’ll call May, tell her that you can both bunk at the Tower until the leak gets solved. It’ll be great. You love sleepovers.”

Peter didn’t twitch during the flight back to the Tower, but F.R.I.D.A.Y. didn’t alert him to any worsening vitals, so he did his best to focus through it. He didn’t waste time taking the suit off when he landed on the roof, just headed straight for the MedBay.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y.?” He called, skidding his way into one of the MedBay rooms. “What do I do? Why hasn’t he woken up yet?”

“He needs oxygen, Boss.”

He felt like screaming. “He’s getting oxygen.”

“Not enough.”

He deposited Peter onto the bed in a tangle of uncoordinated limbs. His lips were tinged with blue, just slightly, and the sight made Tony feel like he wasn’t getting enough oxygen himself.

“Sorry, sorry.” He winced in sympathy as the kid’s head lolled unnaturally against the plastic mattress. “I’ll make you comfy when you can breathe, kiddo, sorry…”

F.R.I.D.A.Y. chimed in before he could even process that he needed her help. “The oxygen tanks are located in the hallway supply closet, along with tubing and a mask.”

He jogged out the door and tore open the closet door. It only took him a few seconds to bundle everything he needed into his arms, but they felt like wasted moments all the same.

He’d helped set up a few oxygen tanks in the past, and it wasn’t necessarily difficult. Attaching the tubing was made slightly more complicated by the tremors running through his hands, but he pushed through it. 

“There ya go, buddy.” Relief rushed through him once the mask was snug over the kid’s face. “All better now. Or, at least, we’re on our way, yeah?”

The next few minutes dragged by. Tony resisted the urge to glue himself to the vital monitors. Instead, he forced himself to trust F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s judgement, and stuck right by Peter’s side, brushing his hair back and talking gently. He knew firsthand the adrenaline rush of waking up in a place different than the one you lost consciousness in, knew how terrifying and disorienting it was. He wanted Peter to have an anchor: something that he understood, even if he didn’t understand anything else.

“His oxygen stats are improving rapidly, Boss,” F.R.I.D.A.Y. offered after what felt like an eternity. “I estimate that he is likely to regain consciousness soon.”

Sure enough, Peter groaned a minute or two later, forehead wrinkling and he shifted weakly against the mattress. 

“Hey buddy,” he murmured, cupping Peter’s face and tilting his head so he’d be lined up perfectly in the kid’s vision when he opened his eyes. “C’mon. Look at me, yeah? Let me know you’re alive in there.”

Peter’s eyes snapped open. For a brief second, his entire body keyed up, muscles coiling, but then his gaze cleared and his pupils found the face hovering above him and Tony could see recognition shoot through his expression. He melted, then, a tiny smile quirking up the corner of his mouth.

“Morning,” Tony whispered. Peter just blinked up at him slowly, brow furrowed in confusion. “It’s alright. Just keep breathing, nice and slow.”

A sluggish hand fumbled up to the oxygen mask, but Tony caught it before he could pull it off. “Yeah, I know. Leave that be. It’s helping.”

“Patrol?” Peter slurred, and Tony had to strain to make out the word through the mask.

He shook his head. “Shh. Don’t worry about it right now, alright?”

To his surprise, Peter relented, eyes drifting closed again, any hint of lingering tension releasing from his expression. “M’kay.”

Tony let his head bow forward, shaky with relief. He felt like he’d spend the rest of his life chasing after Peter Parker, scooping him up and stitching him back together again.

“I’m really glad you’re alright, buddy,” he said, voice low and strained.

Peter didn’t answer, just turned his face sleepily into his palm, but Tony didn’t need to hear anything from the kid, anyway.

He knew.

[orange-waterfalls]

I'm Havin' Feelings Fer Ye

Captain Magnum x gender neutral!reader

@lovefor-xreaders ty for the prompt!

A/N: Guess who has no life and wrote an entire 2,000 word fanfic all in one day? THIS ASSHOLE! im so fucking bored guys, please, this is all I have. Send prompts. Uh... Rated T for cursing and violence. I think mostly angst, fluff at the end.

Word Count: 2.3k

--

You danced around the ship with some of the other crewmates to shanties the captain sang. You found treasure! You actually found treasure! You had honestly expected to die at some point… but you didn't! And you found treasure! That was wonderful! You were starting to think the heist wasn't such a bad idea! Even though Mark's… gone… you'd be alright! You had treasure! You'd be alright…

Captain Magnum watched you as you danced around, a smile present on your face. It made him feel all weird inside… he'd lived long enough to know what love feels like… probably. This was not it… he didn't think… he honestly didn't know. But when he watched you spin and kick your feet and laugh… he felt real happy…

You danced for a while before you eventually got tired and sat down, panting. The captain and the crew were messing with the treasure. Picking it up and letting it fall back into the chest, examining it, biting it…

These people were weird…

You held out your hands for your share of the treasure, since you were being patient. He looked to you and set a small coin in your hand, curling your fingers and patting them. You squinted at him, wondering if he's actually serious. He seemed to be, since he headed to his quarters immediately after. You frowned, looking at the coin. You'd talk to him about that later…

Captain Magnum felt a bit bad about only giving you a coin. What else was he supposed to do? You might've left if he gave you more treasure! He couldn't have that! Then again… that seemed a bit manipulative… eh, you'd be fine. He sat down in his chair and thought about you.

You were an enigma to him.

He'd felt this way before… but it was so… prominent this time… why was he so fond of you? It's not like you were special! You just had beautiful skin and sparkly eyes and the most stunning smile he'd ever seen and...

Goddamnit, he was in love…

He sighed, wondering what he was going to do about this, when he heard a sharp knock at his door. He jumped a bit, not expecting anybody since it was pretty late. He stood up and walked over, opening the door. You were standing there with your arms crossed. He was going to greet you, but you looked pissed. He wondered why. Then, you held up the coin.

"Are you kidding?" You asked accusingly. "I'm your first mate, you trust me enough to choose where we go, and you give me this bullshit?" You started walking towards him. Despite the height difference, he felt a bit intimidated by you. He stepped back.

"Listen, I be th' cap'n. I already told ye, me share be more fair than others," he stated. You glared at him and he felt his stomach drop. "Ye knew wha' ye were gettin' into, ye can nah be angry," he crossed his arms. You sighed.

"Fine. Whatever," you mumbled as you left the cabin. He opened his mouth to apologize, but nothing came out. He closed his mouth again. You were already gone anyway. Nothing he could do about it now. He'd get some sleep and you'd be fine in the morning.

--

It had been a few days since you found the treasure. You weren't talking to Magnum. He kept glancing at you as you were swabbing the deck. Your smile was replaced with a frown. It was less of an angry frown and more of a sad frown, but it made him feel just as bad. He waited a while to talk to you because he didn't want to mess it up. He eventually decided that it was a good enough time to do so, and he walked over to you.

"Mornin', first mate! How did ye sleep?" He asked. You paused for a moment, but you didn't answer. "Uh... 'twas a bit windy last night, huh? Glad we got all th' loot inside..." you still didn't look up, but your frown got tighter. He patted his hands on his legs and sucked in a breath. "Wonderful weather we be havin'?" You finally stopped mopping and turn to him.

"What do you want?" You asked, exasperated. He frowned.

"Are ye okay? Ye seem upset…" he commented.

"Oh, no yeah I'm totally fine!" You scoffed. "My best friend's dead, the guy who killed him won't even bother giving me any sort of compensation, I may never see my family or friends again, but sure I'm fine." You stated, mopping vigorously. Magnum sighed and looked at your face. You looked like you were on the verge of tears. He opened and closed his mouth, trying to find the right words.

"I... I be sorry. I'll give ye more treasure if... If ye promise ye won't weigh anchor…" he finally managed. You stopped and turned to him slowly. His eyes widened. "No, no, no! Ye... I didn'... um…" he gulped as you raised an eyebrow at him.

"Uh-huh. Go on. I'm waiting." You demanded. He took a deep breath.

"I... I find ye endearin'... 'n I wants ye t' stay... wit' me... specifically." He said. Your face softened a bit, to his joy. He smiled.

"I… have people back home." You said. His smile fell. "I can't just… leave and… not tell them anything…"

"Then tell 'em! Write 'em a letter or somethin'! That would be fine!" He said desperately.

"What am I supposed to say? "Hey, guys! I eloped with a 7 foot tall pirate and am now sailing the seven seas as his first mate"?"

"...yes?" He said, unsure. You sighed and looked down. He held his breath, waiting for whatever you were going to say next.

"What am I supposed to tell his family?" You asked softly. He took a deep breath.

"I... I dunno. 'n... I be mighty, mighty sorry about wha' I did t' yer friend... But... I... I be... I reckon I be in love wit' ye…" he said shakily. You looked up at him, your eyes widened. You could see a tint of red on his suntanned cheeks. He avoided your eyes for a bit before you chuckled. He looked at you. You smiled at him warmly. He returned it.

"I…" you began, blushing. You were cut off by the sound of a cannon.

"Avast! Prepare to be boarded!" A voice boomed from above.

"Oh, God, not again," you whined. Magnum reached out to put a hand on your shoulder, but another cannonball whizzed past you two, making you fall in different directions.

"Ye hide. I'll take care o' this," he instructed. He unsheathed his sword as you hid behind a nearby barrel, watching him to see if he'd need any assistance.

"Who be thar? Show yourself, yellow-bellied cur!" He yelled. You blinked, processing what he said. "Yellow-bellied cur". Huh. That was new. You heard wood creaking behind you and ducked further behind the barrel. You slowly rose and saw a man standing in from of Magnum. He was taller than you and had an average build, and was wearing a pirate outfit. His clothes looked… cleaner and more fancy than Magnum's. He was holding a sword and had a peg leg.

"Who are ye callin' a yellow-bellied cur?" He said in a low, rough voice.

"Obviously you, shitlord!" You said, quickly covering your mouth with your hand afterwards. The man turned and looked at you. He raised an eyebrow, smirking. You suddenly felt… violated.

"Well, well, well. Wha' 'ave we here?" He chuckled. "I may jus' keep ye fer meself." You laid your hand on a revolver.

Magnum tightened his fist around the hilt of his sword and swung. The man blocked it and stumbled back.

"Ye lay a hand on them, ye're dead." He growled. The man smirked and tried to jab at his side. Magnum managed to block it in time. The two captains went on sword fighting for a couple minutes while you stayed behind the barrell. The other man's crew was on the ship fighting the rest of yours. You felt a bit useless, so you grabbed the revolver and aimed towards the other pirates. You grazed two in their legs, and nailed one in the shoulder. You lost track of Captain Magnum after a while. While you looked for him, you heard something land behind you. You yelped and spun around, seeing the invading captain.

"Ahoy thar, darlin'," he smirked at you. You held the revolver up to aim at him. He scoffed. "C'mon, darlin'. Thar's no needs fer that. I won't hurt ye… Much."

"Go fuck yourself," you snarled.

"Such naughty language fer such a sweet thin'." He laughed. "I'll 'ave fun wit' ye."

"Oh, yeah, that doesn't sound creepy at all. Great," You sighed. He took a step towards you and you cock the gun. "Don't move, asshole." You warned.

"Oh, come on now." He chuckled. "We both know ye're too soft t' shoot me. So, why don't ye-" You shoot. The bullet hits him in the side. His eyes widened as he stared at you in disbelief.

"Something about me, captain," you set the gun down and walked over to him as he fell to the floor. "My best friend is dead. I'm feeling a bit pissed. And I have shot a man before." You got on one knee and leaned down next to his ear. "I'm not as soft as I look." You stood back up and walked back to the middle of the deck.

Captain Magnum was frantically walking around. The crew looked okay, so you sighed. The captain heard and spun towards you. He smiled widely as he ran over and enveloped you in a hug.

"Oh, thank Poseidon. Ye're okay. If I had lost ye I... I... I dunno wha' I'd do!" He stammered, petting your head. "Ye're okay, right?" You smiled and hugged him back.

"I'm alright, Captain," You whispered. He sighed and held you for a while before the previous first mate cleared his throat.

"'tis real touchin' 'n all, but we should prolly repair th' ship." He suggested. Magnum turned to him, glaring.

"Ye interrupted a bondin' moment t' tell me that?" He glowered. You bit your lip to keep from laughing. The crewmate opened his mouth to respond, but almost immediately closed it and started picking up pieces of wood. The other crewmates followed suit.

"We should help them," you declared. Magnum looked at you, his eyebrows knitted together.

"But do we 'ave t'?" He asked hopefully. You smiled and pulled away from him. Despite wearing a couple layers, he could feel the absence of your warmth. He sighed and helped clean up.

--

It took a while, but you all managed to clean up the deck. You'd probably need to buy more wood to repair the boat, but you figured it'd be fine. It was dark now and everyone had retired to their quarters. Except for you. You sat on the deck, staring up at the stars. Magnum left his quarters to check on you. He got worried when he saw you weren't asleep. He walked over to you, ruining the mood a bit with how loud he was. He dropped next to you with a loud creak of the floor. You didn't look at him.

"Ahoy," he greeted.

"Hi," you responded bluntly. You both sat there for a moment while he came up with things to say.

"Are ye okay?"

"Yep."

"Okay. That be good." Silence. "Wha' are ye doin'?"

"Just… stargazing."

"Okay. Why?"

"Felt like it."

"Oh." More silence. "Are ye thinkin' about 'im?"

"Yes."

"Do ye want t' talk about 'im?"

"No. Not tonight. Maybe another time."

"Ok... 'tis a tad cold tonight."

"Yeah. I guess so."

"Me cabin be th' warmest... If ye... Wanted t' sleep in thar... Wit' me... That would be alright…" You whipped you head towards him surprised. He noticed your panic. "Or not! That be fine too! I understand. Sorry fer botherin'. Goodnight!" He started to stand up, but you took his hand. He looked at your interlocked hands, flushed, then back at you.

"That would… that'd be fine." You said shakily. "I just… want to stay out here a bit longer."

"Ok," He nodded and plopped back down. You retracted your hand and tucked your knees to your chest, looking back up. He continued to look at you for a second, smiling, before looking back up. You chuckled.

"He loved space…"

--

Captain Magnum could listen to you talk for hours. You start talking about stars, then about Mark, then you get to talking about your other friends and family. He listened to everything you said because he knew it was important to you. You started to yawn after 45 minutes and you leaned on his arm. He froze in place, not wanting to bother you. Eventually, he looked down at you to see if you were asleep. Once he confirmed you were, he effortlessly lifted you up and carried you to his cabin. He gently set you on the large, warm bed. He wasn't planning on getting on it with you. You weren't there yet. You hadn't even told him you loved him back. He couldn't in good conscience get into a bed with you. He sat in his chair and looked at you. You were so…

"Gorgeous," he said under his breath. You cracked an eye open.

"Right back at you," you slurred. He blushed. You held out your arms. "Come into bed," he blushed deeper.

"No, I don't reckon I should…" He tried to say. You whined and he just couldn't. He stood up and carefully climbed into the bed with you, making sure to keep a bit of space between you two. That was pointless because you immediately turned over and snuggled into his chest. He gently moved his arms to embrace you tightly. He set a small kiss to your head and just lied there, wanting to treasure this moment.

Your eyes closed again as you heard him say "I love you". You smiled.

"I love you, too."

If I didn't say it before SEND PROMPTS