#i've been slowly working on this because atm she's wavering back and forth

[feyxareum]

∘⡊ ☾ ˚⊹Life Goes On⊹

hundreds of years have passed, many have come and gone, though areum still remained on this earth roaming around. she couldn’t even remember when she began getting tired of the same old things happening, all of the moving she was forced to do, unsure of when exactly it was that she became comfortable with the silence that she now felt more at ease with than dealing with noises of others.

he was gone....again. her own sire had his own ways of doing things, coming and going as he pleased without a single word. at this point she was used to the sudden disappearance, seeing as it was something he did quite a few times over the years. was she upset about it? no, in fact she’s glad he decided to leave rather than stick around. he was someone who was dangerous, someone who put her at risk of even feeling again, and she knew it was better this way, that him being gone yet again meant that she could go back to her normal life she had been living for the past 400 years since the last time he had left.

the fact that he had shown up out of the blue still remained in her thoughts, remembering how he had ended up finding out about how she had once given birth to his child, how the very room she kept hidden in her home contained the memories from those times before she was forced to give the child to another family. maybe it was because of this that he had suddenly left once more, though she wasn’t worried about it and she wasn’t going to overthink the whole situation either. in her eyes, areum was better off alone.

she stands there, standing on top of one of the buildings as she watches the citizens walking down below. the sun had already disappeared, the night sky feeling a lot more comforting to her rather than the daylight.

areum didn’t know why or even how she had ended up here, though she figured it was just her own boredom getting the best of her once again, denying the voice in her head that tells her it’s because she doesn’t want to go home. no, that was something she preferred to do, the quietness of her home was the most comforting and made her feel more relaxed, she wasn’t someone who enjoyed dealing with the humans or even listening to their drunken selves arguing over the dumbest matters.

the slight sudden breeze blowing around her feels nice, her hair moving just slightly as the wind blows past her. it was all his fault, he returned and made her waver, caused her walls to crack and become fragile, she had to fix this and she had to fix it fast before someone came along and finished the job. she couldn’t allow her walls to crumble around her and give in to the humanity that was now clawing at those walls she had worked so hard to build up over time. areum had to return everything back to it’s normal state before she ended up becoming someone she had tried so hard to get rid of, someone who could feel for others and have sympathy.

she was on a thin line and wavering, making her vulnerable. either she would fight it, mend those walls and continue down the path she had set for herself, or she would fall hard and end up letting her humanity win the battle she had been fighting against since she last saw her sire weeks ago.

she would have to work harder than ever and hope that she could hold it all back, hope that the monster inside of her would completely kill off any bit of humanity she was starting to feel. she couldn’t lose this inner battle with herself no matter what, it was dangerous and risky for her to even have the slightest thought of allowing that ‘human’ side of her to return. she’s managed to get by all of these years without such emotions and she wasn’t about to let them take over her again. she just couldn’t.