#i've had headaches for a long time and menstrual headaches for. well. since I started

[senadimell]

Huh. Kinda wondering if this happened to me...

[pacifymebby]

Hey bestie I’m really sorry to be messaging in again but I’m a little worried for my health at the moment. This period seems quite off. It started off with an entire day like over 24 hours of spotting and it wasn’t my usual colour and I had cramps with the spotting as well (which never happens for me). And then I got an actual flow of red blood (which is still pretty light flow and light in colour) and that’s been going on for 1.5 days since the spotting. And I’m still getting cramps when I usually only get cramps on the first day of my period and thats usually when the flow is the heaviest and reddest and I don’t usually have spotting first. I’ve never gotten cramps on the third day. Now you might think I’m just being overly paranoid but my periods have been the same since I started getting them and I’ve never missed one or had weird things like this happen like I mean they are the exact same every time.

Could this all be because of stress? Like I’ve had much much more stress in my life than this before and I’ve still never experienced disturbances in my menstrual cycle so idk why I would now? I’ve also been feeling quite ill. Ive taken my temperature and I don’t seem to have a fever. But I’m slightly nauseated and woozy feeling occasionally and have had pretty bad headaches. Have I done something to make myself sick? Have I literally stressed myself to sickness? Is this something I should be speaking to a doctor about or is this just regular stuff I shouldn’t be worried about? So sorry for being para again about stupid shit I’ve just never had stuff like this happen to me before - age gap crush anon

Hi hi hi, I am so sorry I haven't been ignoring you I've just been super busy with my final uni work hand in and feeling massively overwhelmed, I wanted to save answering for a time when I felt like I could give my absolute most to you haha.

So first of all, I know you're probably feeling a little bit disappointed since you'd sort of gotten used to the idea, but ultimately its probably for the best that you are not pregnant with this man's child. It'll be much nicer having a family with someone you know isn't going to walk away from you. I think it's fair to say you don't really know this guy as much as you'd ideally like to know the father of your future children.

But i do think the disappointment you talked about in your other message is totally natural, especially if you're someone who knows they want kids in the future.

Probably just let yourself feel the feelings and then they will pass.

Secondly, about what you said about him putting you off men.

Again I think that's perfectly normal and like 9 times out of 10 men are so shit and unreliable and just utterly wank. BUT remember this guy is the first guy you've ever been with and that you were also really new to the whole dating thing in general, don't let this experience completely put you off dating/dating men. But also, when it comes to dating and stuff in future like, don't necessarily feel like you have to hunt a relationship down, be friends with people first, develop and nurture connections over a long time. AND ALSO embrace ur bisexuality for sure, definitely go and persue relationships with women, I found it a really pivotal part of my developmental years (not that I'm really sure I'm out of those lollll)

One think I'd warn you against is that the gays can be just as toxic and shitty as the straights and I've known a fair few women to be shitty too so just be aware I guess?

Tbh though I don't want to put you off dating and I'm more on the team of "it's gone to shit once so you can survive if it happens again, take that risk girlie"

Now for the health stuff it really is difficult for me to judge because what you've just sent me sounds like a normal period but if it's not a normal period for you then I understand completely why you'd be stressed out.

One thing I will say is that when I start having sex and stuff my period does change a bit and it definitely did after I lost my virginity. However I don't know if that's a medical fact or based in any kind of science it's just an observation I have about my own period.

I would say if you're unsure it's a good idea to seek medical advice, but I'd advise you don't worry too much until you know if somethings wrong or not.

Sometimes our body just changes a bit and especially since you're very much at a developmental time in your life your hormones and your body will be all over the place and changing drastically. I don't think that shit settles until you're mid twenties.

Sending you lots of love girly, and feel free to update me in future too, even if age gap crush is dead, I wanna hear the girl crush gossip too hehe ❤️❤️❤️

[hellospunkiebrewster]

Hello! I recently started following your blog and it's amazing! From what i've seen you know a lot of stuff so i thought i'd ask you a question that's been on my mind for some time - How did women deal with their periods in regency era? I'm sorry but i was wondering what D&D MC would do in that time of the month, with all those dresses and stuff.

Awesome question Nonnie! It is true that yes, women didn’t have the same sort of luxuries we do now when dealing with their periods but you might be surprised that a lot of the concepts were quite similar. My full answer will be behind the cut here. Let’s talk periods!

Firstly though, I think it is important to talk about what exactly women were sporting under their skirts during the time. In a previous post I mentioned that many ladies of the time did not wear anything under their skirts. Drawers were considered unladylike and risqué as they resembled pants and a lady should never be caught in anything resembling pants, however, they were just beginning to catch on. Even many men did not wear them in the early 1800s, instead using their overlong shirts as their primary undergarment as it was thought that drawers spoiled the line of your trousers. Drawers made their appearance in 1806, but it took time for them to gain popularity for both men and women. The lack of anything under a lady’s skirts was the subject of many a cartoonist of the era.

Thomas Rowlandson’s Exhibition Stare Case, 1800.

The first women’s undergarments, pantalettes, were little more than two tubes of fabric with a tie to secure them around the woman’s waist. They may include some decorative lace at the hems, Incase they were seen by the likes of Mr. Sinclaire. This allowed for the lady to attend to her business without having to remove any layers of her clothing. It also probably provided for quite the show when a woman might be on stage dancing the can-can.

Drawing of women’s pantalettes.

So now that we know what was covering, or not covering, a lady’s business in that era we can talk about what ladies did during their monthlies. There were about three to four options, depending on your flow and means.

The first and most convenient of the options was probably what amounts to as a homemade tampon. This didn’t require you to remove anything in order to relieve yourself. A smooth stick, like a dowel, about the length of one’s little finger would be wrapped with absorbent linen cloths and sewn. Sometimes herbs or other home remedies would be included in this bundle, in an attempt to help assuage some of the symptoms that came along with one’s monthly. A long string would be attached and sewn in as well, and a lady would use the string not only for extraction but for tying it around her leg as to not leave the bloody little bundle of shame behind if she sneezed or coughed in public. These were disposable. Other tampons might be as simple as a small drawstring bag with a sponge or wadded up fabric inside. The small baggie’s contents could be disposed of and replaced and the bag reused. These would be homemade and our dear friend Briar has probably been busy when we’re out, stitching up some tampons for us.

Drawing of these “privy place suppositories” as they were called.

The second option, probably often used as a backup for ladies with heavier flows, would be to secure a wadded up napkin, made of fabric, between her legs with the use of a belt just above her hips like a loincloth under her skirt, petticoats, and chemise. This is where the term on the rag comes from. This fabric was essentially what amounted to a long strip of fabric, similar in many ways to a cravat (the tie that men would wrap around their neck and tie in fancy knots as part of their full dress) folded over itself many times, although definitely not as heavily starched and painstakingly ironed as Beau Brummell’s cravats. This basically amounted to a pad, only secured around the waist since underwear, in the modern sense, was not around to hold it in place. These, unlike their tampon counterparts, were not disposable and would be kept in a covered bucket of water in a cool, private place until the lady’s monthly was over and they could be all boiled and laundered together.

Drawing of a menstrual belt, a lot more modern than what our MC would use as this particular one was from the 1870s.

The next option was reserved for ladies lucky enough to have light flows. They would simply free bleed and wear perhaps a layer of heavier petticoats under their dresses to keep their condition a secret. This method began to fall out of practice as it was discovered, towards the late 1800s to be unsanitary to just leave blood everywhere in your clothing.

Lastly, ladies of a particular economic standing (women of noble birth, wives in the ton, and those simply with rich husbands or fathers) would quite possibly spend the days in bed, feigning a headache or other type of malady, instead of troubling themselves too much with all of that suppository, menstrual belt, free bleeding nonsense unless they really had a ball or dinner party to attend that was quite crucial and particularly enticing.

I think I’m pretty safe in assuming that you realize Midol did not exist back then. The Georgian/Regency Era is also a bit removed from the religious shame of the Puritans and Medieval Times. Before this time, pain relief was not offered and extremely frowned upon as it was believed that each cramp was a reminder of Eve’s original sin. Queen Victoria, who took the throne in 1837, was actually the first woman to publicly admit to using pain relief during labor as it was also thought of as cleansing and important to the whole process of childbirth. However, in this era, that sort of religious shame was falling out of practice and women would use herbs, tinctures, and teas to help with not only pain but also shortening their time of the month.

Women would drink ginger teas, peppermint teas, chamomile tea, and infusions of yarrow root to help with cramping. They may also use other herbs or tinctures applied to the area or taken to help as well. Motherwort, used to quicken contractions for birth, may be used to ease menstrual pain. Licorice or black cohosh depending on the season we’re used. Victorian times brought about patented medicines and we began to see actual reliable pain relief for women during their periods.

Humphries Homeopathic No. 31, a Victorian Era patented medicine for menstrual relief.

I hope this answers your question Nonnie! This was a fun one, although I think I’m getting sympathy cramps just writing and thinking about it.