#id.kris wu

[idolizerp]

[ LOADING INFORMATION ON POIZN’S MAIN DANCE STEELE…. ]

DETAILS

CURRENT AGE: 28 DEBUT AGE: 20 SKILL POINTS: 15 PERFORMANCE | 05 VOCAL | 15 DANCE | 05 RAP SECONDARY SKILLS: B-boying

INTERVIEW

SHITSTARTER.

only in not in such strong terms –– it’s no secret that steele believes actions to speak louder than words. sometimes it’s as if his main mode of communication is dance. but aside from that, aside from his lifeblood and everything that’s made him who he is today, it’s glances from the background. freakishly tall ( 6’ 5” towers over heads everywhere in asia ), you’ll often find steele standing in the back. to occupy his time ( and to earn that blessed attention ), he makes faces at the camera, rolling his eyes at certain things and giving incredulous ‘ are you kidding me ? ’ expressions at unsympathetic lenses. this wordless candor is what builds him up in the early days.

steele is no - nonsense, but he can have a dry sense of humor. often times you’ll see him lifting his brows at a group member, engaging in a slight chuckle. other times he’ll poke and prod within his group and spark play - fights between members with just a look, his face holding a treasure trove of inside jokes.

so, he is wordless. but even when very little noise leaves his mouth ( and people never seem to get enough of the rich depths of his voice ), steele has a lot to say. or, at least, that’s how it was in the beginning.

over time ( after a single scandal ), though, his snarkiness becomes a detraction. critical and scathing glances are amplified. every single movement is read too far into. why did he cross his arms at that specific time ? is there some beef between them ? did he yell at that person for getting into his light too ? really, he blows up at ONE PERSON and the whole world seems to think he’s a ticking time bomb ready to explode.

the truth is, that’s the old steele. he’s almost thirty; he understands that screaming at people isn’t productive or acceptable. and he also doesn’t believe letting such anger and resentment fester within him is worth his time. the way his face sits coolly unmoving now says as much. no longer is he the funny background guy. steele is the handsome man with the big brows who doesn’t say much. who scowls, but that’s only because that’s how his face is built. forgiveness is a slow and long time coming, but 99 is convinced that keeping his mouth shut and his expressions blank is the key to resetting it all.

“ don’t comment on anything, don’t even blink in someone’s direction because it’ll be taken the wrong way. ” they don’t yank on his chain, instead leaving rather forceful suggestions, but he lets the ‘ or else what ? ’ die on his lips nevertheless. steele / jieping / everything in between knows the answer : “ or else we’ll send you packing. ” they don’t need to squish him like a bug like midas would, because they know that they can just drop him instead of offering to renew his contract, leaving him flat on his ass. and isn’t that just the single worst thing in the known universe ?

so, nowadays, it’s less. ‘ oh my god, look at steele’s face ! ’ and more ‘ who’s that really hot guy with the chin in the back ? he’s so good - looking but he doesn’t say anything. ’

and steele preens at being called hot / sexy / et cetera, et cetera. so, all in all, it’s not so bad.

BIOGRAPHY

PART ONE: PHANTOM BLOOD

keep your head down. don’t start any trouble. we’re tight on money as it is. just finish school. get a good job. help mama out with the bills.

an easy five - step plan enacted on august 17, 1990, 9 : 36 am cst after a difficult birth and an extremely large baby boy. only a mother and father are in the waiting room, waiting to take their daughter and grandson home to guangzhou. the father is a potter, the mother a seamstress, and the daughter a secretary. the not - son - in - law is nowhere to be found, and he never reappears in their lives after the grandson’s birth.

three incomes are still just barely enough to keep the grandson ( jieping, “ hero of peace ” ) fed and clothed. so the boy starts to help out where he can, bouncing to an inaudible tune on his mother’s lap as he helps her sort through letters and take down messages for her boss with shocking accuracy for a boy of seven. this intelligence is never developed further, his free time spent more on menial chores than stimulation and socialization.

at the very least, they indulge his passion for dance, scrounging around enough to send him to classes for a few years from the ages of five to eight before they run out and he has to drop out. jieping never begrudges his family for that.

he never lets what few friends he has know that he does not, in fact, own seven pairs of the same pants –– but, in fact, two that he recycles over the week. it doesn’t even matter, anyway. once he’s done with step five, he’ll have all the pants he wants.

PART TWO: BATTLE TENDENCY

have nots like jieping tend to hold a lot of resentment. bitterness. once his mother manages to wrangle enough money to ship him off to a private school in beijing, he starts to see just how much he really does not have. rolexes on the upperclassmen, his peers deciding to go out for milk tea every other day while he sits in his lonely apartment counting his monthly allowance and stretching it as thin as it can possibly go. while the others get to avoid the oppressive smog either by being driven everywhere or from the safety of their own vehicles, jieping invests in masks and filters.

he walks everywhere, even through the seedier parts of town late as night as long as they get him to his destination quicker because he knows the only place he’d really be understood is the underground dance scene. there, he’s nameless, but his talent is admired. self - taught, crew - less, he spends more time than he expected giving vague non - answers when his identity is questioned. dancing is his priority ; he’s not the type to show up to an underground club hoping to get recruited, though the interest is, at least, flattering. jieping isn’t there to make a name for himself. he’s just there to move. and if he puts on a good performance, trapped in his own world as he is, that’s just negligible.

back at school, it doesn’t improve matters that he’s something of an unkempt lad, often yelled at by administrators to start tucking his shirt into his pants and to wear a normal belt or else insert - empty - threat - here. if people look at him long enough, they’ll start to see his father in his face. if they’re malicious enough, they might even use his existence to blackmail a high ranking official who has yet pay a hefty fine for secretly siring another child. but then they see the way jieping’s thick brows draw together and his fists clench and decide that it’s better to be on the good side of a young boy who’s too tall to be only thirteen.

he has no qualms with punching out fellow students, though this only happens three times in his entire career at beijing huijia private academy. the knuckles on his left hand catch on the cheekbones of rich kids that are too proud to admit that they’ve been beaten up by a dirty commoner. the so - called ‘ charity cases ’ start to look up to jieping. their accounts of his bravery and heroism are inconsequential when antis dredge up this part of his past.

see ? he was always aggressive. what a prick.

PART THREE: STARDUST CRUSADERS

“ it’s a vacation, ” he tells his mother. “ you’re supposed to relax. ” they stand in front of her estranged elder sister’s daunting apartment complex in gangnam. he’s fifteen, scrawny with long hair and an underbite, bruises all over his arms and legs from failed attempts at b - boying. he’s learning, getting better, but he just doesn’t have the upper arm strength to hold himself up very long before crashing down. his mother thinks he’s getting into fights again instead of hanging around with underground dance crews, and, frankly, that’s a little hurtful.

jieping’s never met his aunt before, the woman leaving six years before he was born. all he knows is that she’s something of a socialite ( ex - trophy wife ), and she’s friends with lots of powerful people. when he meets her, he notes with some distaste that she doesn’t seem very fond of his mother. but when he tells her he likes to dance, her eyes light up and he’s taken off - guard.

as if his mother is a nonentity, jieping’s aunt starts interrogating him, nodding as he drops some names from the chinese underground scene that he’s sure she doesn’t know, and after an hour of probing, she eyes him, and asks, “ you know, i think you’d thrive in sopa. ” she knows people, she can get him an interview and audition and is even willing to help him take care of the costs.

jieping blinks. “ what ? ” he barely speaks korean, his elective language being english. jieping’s only experience with korean was being his friend’s study buddy, whereupon he picked up a few basic sentences. to say nothing, of course, of the fact that he wasn’t even intending to pursue a career in dance. and that … he wasn’t expecting his mother to seem so enthralled by the idea. his aunt tells him that sopa’s not planning on accepting new students just yet, but if he’d like to enroll for the next school year, he should let her know by the end of the week. seeing as they’re staying in her loft, he’s probably going to be pestered until the day they leave.

he mentions it off - handedly to his mother as they’re preparing to go to bed that night and is taken aback when she tells him to consider it. “ how do you know she’s not lying to us ? ”

didn’t he know she used to be a dancer, leaving home because their parents thought her dreams were too frivolous ? that her career came to a screeching halt when her relationship with an idol was exposed and she was ( publicly ) cast to the wayside ? she probably sees some of herself in him.

( not like that’s troubling. no, not at all. )

“ if you really like dancing, baobei, ” his mother tells him, her hand cupping his cheek, “ if you really love it like you used to when you were young, then you should take her up on it. she’s even willing to pay for everything. ” oh, and it always comes down to money.

if he stays with his aunt, his mother won’t have to send him red envelopes anymore. she can use her meager paycheck on herself. purchase some new clothes, finally fix those clunky heels. maybe even break out the hotpot all for herself. jieping chooses to think of it this way rather than acknowledging the fact that it sounds like his mother’s just trying to get him out of her hair –– or, her wallet, as it were. he makes his decision that night. it’s the day before new year’s eve. a little early to be making resolutions like this, he thinks, but it doesn’t hurt.

living with his aunt isn’t as bad as it seems at first, culture shock –– which she helps with –– aside. he thought he’d profoundly dislike her, but it turns out the woman actually gives good advice. in addition to whipping his korean into ( amorphous ) shape, she teaches him actual technique so that he doesn’t end up hurting himself, and she even takes him out to eat with a bunch of her b - boy friends when his acceptance to sopa is finalized. it sparks the start of a very close kinship, expressed by wandering into her room in the middle of the night to ask what a certain word means in this one context or by massaging his calf after a long day of practice.

when jieping actually starts to get some real instruction, he skyrockets. one of the “ best damn dancers in this school ” according to the chair of the department of practical dance, most likely to succeed, his teachers all rave about his potential. the other students grumble about the fact that a non - native –– a boy from across the yellow sea –– is their superior. his area of focus is singular, they gripe. he’s not even interested in pursuing anything else. the only reason the faculty likes him so much is because he could’ve gone to hanlim, and all they expect him to do is dance, anyway. the man can hold a tune, but that’s not exactly difficult to do. so what if he’s actually pretty steady even when dancing ? his rapping is average, and that’s mostly because his grasp of the language isn’t as strong as it could be. a singular skillset and the vestiges of natural talent in other areas aren’t worth all that attention. a lump of clay could become a beautiful vase, but jieping’s never seemed interested in metaphorical pottery. maybe the praise will actually start to seem merited when his grades in everything other than dance stop being terrible.

jieping doesn’t care much when they relentlessly mock his accent, but it does drive him into fluency if only to stop that avenue of attack so he can have his peace and quiet. it’s a pity about his looks, the frequent chin jokes tossed his way, but braces have cleaned him up quite a bit and when he cut his hair ( enough that you could finally see his eyes ) he really wasn’t too bad looking. maybe that’s why he never really gets anywhere until after graduation. in the end, it turned out all the attention he received from the faculty was only meant to keep him from transferring schools when he figured he could get a better education elsewhere. they were waiting for him to seek out companies on his own and leech off of that ( “ we knew he had what it takes ! ” and other -isms thereof ), but when he kept to himself and instead looked into jobs in teaching dance, the favoritism all but vanished in his third year. from “ one of the best ” to “ a very good dancer. ” if only they’d told him how they really felt from the get - go.

“ have you thought about what you wanted to do ? ” his aunt asks him almost a year since he’s been out of school. he helps out at her studio in the meantime, his pockets still lined with her money. it makes sense that she, too, is trying to boot him out of her life –– or, she’s just trying to get him to reach maximum potential, if he wanted to be optimistic. which he didn’t. “ i think you’d do well in the idol circuit. you’re intense. it’s fun to watch you dance, and it’d be a waste to keep it to my studio or the underground when you could have this massive audience. you’ve got that flare about you, y’know ? ”

he thinks of her old boyfriend, the one who almost ruined her life, and makes a face.

“ oh, come on. don’t tell me you didn’t think of it ! you went to school with at least a couple of trainees, didn’t you ? and they didn’t pique your interest at all ? ”

if he shook his head, he’d by lying, but … he’s also something of a realist. him and idol life probably wouldn’t mix –– though not exactly a wild card, he’s got something of an independent streak. he only plays by the rules he likes, and that’s not the most desirable thing for companies looking to hit it big with their next boy group. even the phrase boy group makes him feel a little weird.

his aunt rolls her eyes. “ i know what you’re thinking. you’re too cool or whatever for it, they’ll spend every second of every day trying to control or contain you. i mean, that’d probably be true if you were in midas or msg. but 99’s pretty lax in comparison. koala.t is a maybe. kjh is too new to be reliable, in my opinion, but you could definitely go for the two other ones i mentioned. it’s just something to think about. i can probe around to see who’s currently casting, if you’d like. ” then, as an afterthought, she compliments his shower singing, ruffles his hair, and then flounces away.

jieping scowls at the kitchen counter, sighs, and then makes his choice. he might as well shoot for the stars, right ? even if he misses, he’ll land near the moon.

PART FOUR: DIAMOND IS UNBREAKABLE

99 gets him by chance, a coin that landed on heads leading to him attending two rounds of auditions and an interview.

being added into the company in april of 2010, in the midst of planning poizn out, doesn’t leave him a lot of room for bonding. so he doesn’t really do it. his skill as a dancer is acknowledged by the others, and he’s fine with that. his height intimidates a lot of them, and choreographers grouse about where they should put him in formations so that he doesn’t block people who are ear - height and below. his fairly average performance in rapping and singing is something of a shock, though it’s generally acknowledged among the teachers that he’s nowhere near good enough at either to be given a ‘ lead ’ anything. “ a little boring, ” the vocal teacher says. “ uninspired. but it could be something, if you tried. ” ‘ if ’ being the operative word.

all they know is that he’s a main dancer, through and through. impeccable technique, electrifying ( and just the perfect amount of terrifying ) stage presence. the name of his aunt’s studio sitting prettily at the top of his resumé definitely helps matters, as do his actual good looks once the stylists get their hands on him. he’s got the makings for poizn, they declare. he’s a little surprised. he’s not really friends with the other boys in the lineup, and he’s still something of a greenhorn in 99. to have them push him so far so soon is a little nerve - wracking, and no amount of arm pinching is waking him up from this dream.

what is he going to do when they offer him the spot ? say no ?

and so that’s that.

being an idol is an … acquired taste. he doesn’t expect everything about him to be so relentlessly marketed. his dry humor, which he’d been using to endear himself to his group mates, is suddenly now his shtick. his name ? steele ? some reference about how he’s a tough guy, unbendable, and flashy and shiny all at the same time. sturdy, holds the group’s performances together with his undeniable skill. it’s all coming up roses.

their reputation starts to take a few hits because of scandals before long ( what does 99 expect when looking for bad boys to fit the concept, anyway ? ), but jieping pays it no heed. he likes to think of himself as a good friend, offering support where the others need it, but he also manages to keep himself afloat by 1. ) staying out of trouble and 2. ) looking as if he doesn’t approve of his members’ choices in public. widened eyes as someone dodges a question about a past scandal and stretched lips that indicate a level of ‘ oh jeez ’ are enough to make him go viral for brief moments at a time. for a while, he’s the ‘ good ’ member ( if not the condescending foreigner ), even when cures realize he’s prone to somewhat malicious teasing. he does a good job of masking the slight resentment and weariness of being around constant fuck - ups.

but this good faith doesn’t last long.

2016. dumb and dumber. jacket shooting. he lets his temper get the best of him, becoming one of those rich idiots he hates the most.

( all because of a missed phone call. if he’d slept at an appropriate hour instead of practicing all night, he might’ve been able to catch his mother one last time. semi meets sedan. who’s going to win ?

the public never finds out about this. )

“ what do you think you’re doing ? ” it’s not so much of a roar as a boom. everyone freezes, even his group mates look up at the normally pleasant and quiet man with shock. “ you’re in my light, you idiot ! how is the photographer supposed to take pictures of me when i’m drenched in your shadow ? no, don’t walk that way. knowing you, you’ll just trip over the cable and take out the thing entirely. do you guys just fuckin’ hire anybody these days ? jesus christ. dumb and dumber. guess this song’s about you, huh, moron ? ”

shaky cell phone camera. shaken production assistant. jieping goes viral again. for all the wrong reasons, of course.

at least he realized he’s messed up. every comment that calls him out for his shitty treatment of this particular staff member is absolutely right. he shouldn’t have snapped like that. no matter how tired, no matter how stressed, no matter the deep grief paining his heart, nothing warranted taking it all out on someone who was just trying to do their job. it would have taken less than ten seconds to politely ask the p.a. to move. he might’ve received a smile and apology in return, rather than a young woman bursting into tears. he hates that there are cures that come to his defense. he wants to call them out, but after posting a handwritten apology on instagram, 99 strongly implies that they’d like him to keep mum, more consequences forthcoming.

this isn’t what he wanted. when he calls his aunt for advice, it’s the first time where she doesn’t know what to tell him. she’s disappointed in him, that much is clear in her voice, and he feels even shittier. “ i didn’t think you were that kind of person. ” he’s not, and he isn’t sure if she believes him. but she goes with him, hand in hand, to the funeral back in guangzhou, and it seems like all is forgiven, even if he never ended up explaining himself.

he’s only allowed to be there for two days and he’ll half to spend half of their promotion time benched. nobody recognizes him, mask covering his face, though there’s a slight murmur that maybe tall jieping grew up into this giant after all. he doesn’t make a fuss when he comes back, and 99 pretends that he never left. fans are none the wiser, though jieping’s sure the information is floating around somewhere now.

( his first reappearance on a music show is lukewarm. it doesn’t surprise him that the cheers are quieter than usual. )

poizn looks empty without their main dancer, someone says. if jieping had any amount of sense, he’d leave that empty space for brighter skies. maybe become a recluse like his aunt, teaching other young hopefuls to dance. she really did see a lot of herself in him, didn’t she ?

jieping’s mother didn’t raise a quitter, though, so that kills the thought immediately. it comes to a halt with a crunch of glass and steel.

PART FIVE: GOLDEN WIND

even though it’s two years in the past, 99 still reminds jieping to keep on his toes whenever interacting with anybody. his resting bitch face did him no favors as soon as his snark became an unfavorable mark upon him. he has to be neutral or friendly. no in between. if he can manage to work his way up to happy without looking terrifying, then that’s even better. but any ounce of negative emotion will be read for filth, so it’s in his best interest to stay away from anything pointing downward.

forgiveness comes slowly, given a slight boost when it comes out ( against jieping’s will ) that he personally apologized to the p.a. in question and even took her out to a dinner that went around six figures –– all out of his own pocket. but that’s not enough, because they’re all just waiting for him to scream at someone else.

he’s only two years away from turning thirty, so he figures he should start to act like it. and he does, stopping to think about things from an ‘ adult ’ and ‘ responsible ’ perspective as opposed to ‘ well, i’m doing just fine all on my own. ’ he sacrifices his isolationist tendencies for kindness and encouragement, wanting to show his juniors and the public alike that he’s grown up and decided to show that he really is a good person, just caught at the wrong time.

he tries to pick up where his aunt left off with her vague but pleasant advice, aiming for a wise - beyond - his - years vibe. and if all else fails, then he could at least be the calm respectful one sitting in the back. adult, jieping reminds himself. with a capital a. songs like love scenario and rubber band hinder this a little bit, at least on stage, but he finds that perseverance is the key to everything. so he’ll just keep working at it until he finds himself where he wants to be.

he doesn’t need to hole himself up in a fancy apartment in seoul, waiting for a cousin’s kid to show up and tell him that they enjoy b - boying. he doesn’t have to be a repeat of his aunt. he can claw his way back to the not - top.

it’s not like a guy who stands at 6’ 5” can afford to be scared of heights, after all.