#idk i'm trying to keep the neg feelings at bay but i'm scared i won't be able to much longer. and if that happens my life will be fucked. so
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i hate how i can literally feel myself sinking into a depressive episode and there's nothing i can do to stop it
#i've been extremely busy and stressed this past week or so and so have withdrawn from any friendships i have and now that's finally all over#but since i now have so much less to do it's become all the more apparent that i've been completely isolating myself and am entirely alone#and i feel like i've just been left to watch myself get more and more depressed without being able to do anything about it#and like i would try to get out and go talk to some of the people i was talking to before but i seriously just don't have the energy#and it doesn't help that all of these friendships are kinda shaky rn anyways either bc they're new or bc they're long distance#idk i'm trying to keep the neg feelings at bay but i'm scared i won't be able to much longer. and if that happens my life will be fucked. so#sorry actually the fact that i'm anxious about my future depression is so funny i hate this#shut up hanna
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