#if i feel so inclined…..lo pls. like im capable of shutting up about valewis when i’m not even asked. forget when i’m invited to brainrot !

[milflewis]

uhhh sorry hi ummm please say more about a valewis sex tape? (⓿_⓿) if you feel so inclined?

v v unfleshed out thoughts but !!! i was talking with ag one day and this was spawned into being. so. mb they do one every year??? after nico and the whole brocedes drama the sponsors are concerned about Team Unity and Keeping the Team Whole and so . what shows that two ppl like each other more than them having sex and it being filmed?? rock solid logic

the one in 2017 is v stilted and polite. it is. essentially. two colleagues having sex which. fair. that is what it is. but lewis is also unfairly beautiful and valtteri is only human and valtteri has the prettiest eyes lewis has ever seen and the way he blushes —

it’s not a Disaster is what i’m saying. so they do it again. and again.

and mb it become more and more marketable as ppl love the passion, makes it feel real and intimate. like theyre intruding on something that the drivers havent shown the rest of the world yet unlike everything else.

and then! it’s 2018 and valtteri’s worst year yet and lewis is so. he’s so gentle. does it so he covers valtteri’s face. this is the year val fucks him and not the other way around and lewis pulls him in so val’s face is pressed against his neck and the camera is on lewis’s and and and

(that being one of val’s worst times in his life and he’s so scared of getting fired and hes still on one year contracts. and he has to film this. its so fucked up. and lewis understanding and trying to make it up in the only way he feels he can.)

lewis who has spent his entire career exposed but is secure in this team in a way that val has never been and probably will never be but this. this is smth he can give him.

and then valtteri leaves the team and sponsors get pissed.

(the tape from 2021 was smth else. the adoration. the hot tenderness. the desperate need on the screen bc even tho neither of them had said it they knew this was their last year together and they had never talked about these. never done it outside of this room in hq. wanting to crawl into each other’s skin so they never have to let go and the viewer can Feel this)

and 2022 is just. lewis thinking valtteri is so much happier without these weird fucking obligations with merc ... maybe he’s too embarrassed about wanting him still to approach him past a shoulder pat in the pitlane.

until toto says 'hey i told valtteri we’d let him hitch a ride on the jet' and lewis spending half of it on his phone ignoring valtteri. who has NO clue about lewis' inner turmoil, thinks merc is better off without him even if they seem to have such a weird run of bad luck now and is content to stay in peaceful quiet sitting beside lewis on the jet until he can’t bear it and casually makes a weak joke about lewis and george's tape.

now! it could go two ways. either lewis put a stop to the tapes after valtteri left or he made one with george.

cause you could have lewis and george make a tape and valtteri is jealous and hating that he’s jealous bc it’s such a fucked up thing that they had to do and it’s bad enough that he Misses it and now he’s hating lewis for doing it with someone else when he knows lewis doesn’t have a choice. and then lewis feels guilty and he’s upset about That bc it’s not like he CHOSE george. it’s not like he wanted this but it took way more effort that it should’ve to not call out val’s name during the tape and george is fine. he’s funny and has good takes on the car and he’s Fine. but he’s not val and lewis doesn’t even want val back bc he’s finally happy and he looks so good in alfa and they treat him so well but he also does kinda want him back bc he misses him and it’s a Mess

OR . lewis puts a stop to the tapes and toto isn’t stupid. he sees lewis after valtteri leaves. sees him after the shitshow that was abu dhabi. sees the look in his eyes. and does not push. and then valtteri is left to wondering why now did the tapes stop. what does that mean. does it mean anything???? and suddenly noticing that lewis isn’t really looking at him that much.

(george in the bg like. you guys made sex tapes ?????????)

or or. what if they started making the tape and lewis couldn’t do it.

he couldn’t walk into that room that they only went in to make these. this room that he hates but it’s the only place in the whole world where he got valtteri like this and mb that makes him a terrible person for missing it. for wanting it back. but he can’t go in when he’s not there.

and mb lewis manages to get through it anyway and IS into banging george in a purely physical way and he feels guilty for liking it because its not valtteri, but they have to please sponsors SOMEHOW. and then he sees valtteri in bahrain and is like. toto PLEASE delete that fucking tape.

and valtteri just seems. like. normal?? lewis gets mad at him deep down like, how the fuck can you be all chill and cool about this. how dare you move on while i'm a mess!!!

he doesnt realize how carefully valtteri is sidestepping discussion of the tape when theyre hanging out. valtteri does NOT want to talk about it. he stuffs it down and turns into a fake australian. cycling with the kiwis. sampling wines with daniel. practising denial like the good homosexual that he is!

and seb says that he looks like a pornstar which lewis does NOT know how to deal with bc ???? what does that mean ???? is val making these tapes with other ppl ?????

so things go from valtteri always coming up to lewis on a race weekend to just. lewis CANNOT find him no matter how hard he tries. sidles up to daniel like hey have you seen-?

daniel, eyes shifting: euueueoohhhhhh ... no

lewis mb getting the message that val doesn’t want to see him and that’s. that’s Fine. lewis is so Fine. the car is shit and it’s kind of killing him and the media are dicks and valtteri doesn’t want to talk to him and seb is retiring and lewis is so Fine :( :) :( :)