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#if this was written by a human hi hey sorry article person plz don't hurt me :)
megaawkwardhuman · 11 months
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throughout my days posting to tumblr I try my best to not be an angy little dumbass cuz nobody like hearing people bitch
BUT OH MY GOD THIS ARTICLE
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really REALLY important thing to note: I've said it before on here that guillermo is a character that I love dearly. for a fictional character he's really important to me. I wish I was joking when I say he's help me process shit in the past and made me feel overall better about myself in a weird way? I see a lot of myself in that queer little man
BTW I'M AWARE THIS PROBABLY ISN'T HEALTHY AND WEIRD BUT IT'S TRUE (plz don't judge me)
so I'm a bit biased here
this isn't an anti keeping guillermo human post, this is all word vomit, I have nothing personally against whoever wrote this, and nobody should attack this person (if they are a person? this sounds like it was written by an ai)
oh yeah and there's the real chance this was written by an ai and I'm getting mad at a glorified calculator but oh my god I just need to scream rn let me have this
ok with all of that out of the way HI HI HEY HEY HELLOOOOOOOOOO WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK DID I JUST READ!!?!??!
the fact they get wrong, the bad takes, the headache this is giving me WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?!?!?!? IEUWHJUOFEBK2HODPPIHDWIWINDWIINDWPQ
I could break down EVERY LITTLE THING wrong with this but I don't have the time, energy, or brain cells to annotate and dunk on everything this article gets wrong (plus if this is written by an ai like I suspect there's no real point) BUT WHAT I DO HAVE TIME FOR IS JUMPING HEAD FIRST INTO MY MAIN FUCKING ISSUE
now look look LOOK I get people wanting to keep guillermo human I REALLY DO if you think that way that's fine
hell if done right I AM DOWN FOR IT
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BUT FUCKING EXCUSE ME!?!!?!
UH NO THE FUCK IT WOULDN'T????
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starting with this: UGH BRUH TF?
BESTIE HUH?!?!?!?
yeah it would be interesting but even if they for whatever reason made him a normal plain basic ass vampire THAT COULD STILL BE INTERESTING
seeing a character go from wanting to be a vampire to killing them when need be to now BEING a vampire is interesting, seeing how his dynamics get fucked with be interesting, seeing him learn how to fully be a vampire (something we only really got a glimpse of back in season 1) would be interesting, HAVING HIM FACE CONSEQUENCES FOR BEING A SLAYER TURNED VAMPIRE OR HAVING TO FACE HIM KILLING VAMPIRES IN THE PAST WOULD BE INTERESTING!!!!!!
but but BUUUUUT HERE'S THE THING
EVEN IF HE CAN TURN INTO A VAMPIRE HE'S MORE LIKELY THAN NOT GONNA BE MORE THAN JUST A VAMPIRE
we don't know what the slayer blood will do to the turning process SO EVEN IF IT TAKES LONGER THEN EXPECTED IT WILL BE INTERESTING TO SEE WHAT KIND OF MESSED UP VAMPIRE HE'LL BE IF HE CAN BECOME ONE
like the slayer blood leaves SO SOOOOOOO much room for opportunity if they're concerned with him "being boring" (I feel like being boring would be impossible with the whole slayer thing and the fact that something is always going wrong with him) as just another main vampire
NOW LET'S GET INTO WHY NO: HAVING GUILLERMO BECOME A VAMPIRE WOULDN'T BE FUCKING UP ALL OF THAT PROGRESS HE MADE!
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ah yes the block of text that got me to read this
BECOMING A VAMPIRE WOULDN'T CHANGE OR BETRAY ANY OF THAT!
HE'LL STILL GROW JUST NOT AS A HUMAN, HE'S STILL A WARRIOR, ARE THEY TALKING ABOUT FREDDIE? THAT SHIT IS DONE AND OVER WITH, AND BECOMING A VAMPIRE WOULDN'T MAKE HIM UN COME OUT TO HIS FAMILY OR SOMETHING?????
sure most of that wouldn't have happened if he went on the trip back in season 3 BUT THAT'S LONG DONE AND OVER WITH MY GUY WE'RE ENTERING SEASON 5 NOW
next point: him becoming a vampire also wouldn't be him "giving up" IF ANYTHING WITH THE WAY IT WAS FRAMED IT WOULD BE A STEP FORWARD FOR HIM SINCE IT'S HIM DIRECTLY TAKING HIS LIFE INTO HIS OWN HANDS AND NOT WAITING FOR OTHER PEOPLE TO TAKE THE INITIATIVE
he saw a problem in the house and he saw nobody was going to do anything about it so instead of doing what he would have done a season ago and waiting he took matters into his own hands
AND IF HE ENDS UP WALKING AWAY FROM THIS SEASON A VAMPIRE OF ANY FLAVOR HE'S PROBABLY STILL GOING TO MAKE PROGRESS
as a vampire no matter how messy the process is HIS CONFIDENCE WILL BE AT LEAST A LITTLE BOOSTED DUE TO THE FACT HE'S ON A MORE LEVEL PLAYING FIELD MINIMUM
IT MIGHT TAKE A BIT OF TIME BUT OVER ALL HIM BECOMING A VAMPIRE WON'T BE A STEP IN THE WRONG DIRECTION
(KEEPING HIM HUMAN WOULDN'T BE A STEP IN THE WRONG DIRECTION EITHER BTW I CAN SEE WHY THEY WOULD GO THAT ROUTE)
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and finally a point I can kinda see: him being accepted as only just a human WOULD be nice
he's worked hard to get respect and he's slowly getting it as he moves from familiar to bodyguard to at this point being just guillermo
BUT HERE'S THE THING: THEY DO TO SOME DEGREE RESPECT HIM ALREADY
the baby colin stuff gave him the respect of laszlo, nadja respects him enough to trust him with the money of the nightclub (yeah it was all cuz of a deal he made with her but if he saw him as fully lesser she would have put up more of a fight ageenst testing a human with the club's money) and the time they spent in england while it didn't make them exstreamly close did to some degree made them closer, nandor at this point mostly if not fully respects him, and colin... well we don't know how he'll treat him but if anything carried over from the baby colin shit he should at least give a crumb of a shit about him!
and yeah I do like seeing guillermo navigate around being a human amount vampires
BUUUUUUT it's kinda getting old in my opinion?
like I do like seeing it don't get me wrong but idk I want it shaken up a bit?
and yeah the whole turning gone wrong will do that but after that what then?
this article is trying to say hey let guillermo become a full on slayer cuz that's his true potential
and yeah I love seeing him be a little murder boy that's also not who he is at his core?
even when he's killing vampires left and right it's never out of a hatred for vampires it's so that he can protect others
if anything a human guillermo's full potential wouldn't be just killing cuz his blood says so it would be to protect
now if guillermo became a vampire that would obviously shake shit up a bit
and while I'm down plain jane by the end he's a normal vampire guillermo I've always been team fucked up dhampire guillermo
cuz let's face it guillermo fitting neatly (or mostly neatly) into a vampire human binary is really fucking boring (OR AT LEAST IN MY OPINION)
having him take a long time or need an unusual means to turn him which leads to him not fitting into the label of human or vampire would to me be an amazing way to go about this
in fact the thing I hate the most about this article is the fact that him ending up with a dhampire isn't spoken as a possibility AT ALL (unless I missed it but I fucking refuse to read that dumpster fire again)
having him be a dhampire would address many of the issues this person has with guillermo becoming a vampire
it would make him stand out, it would test him, it would lead to growth, and it wouldn't be boring and leave him with more to do as he figures out his new unique identity with the others
in conclusion: I spent WAY WAAAAY too much time on this
I'm going to slam my face into some grass now
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