#im headed out the door akldfsd

[jawnjendes]

please don’t wake me up | shawn mendes

university au summer lovin/lovin in the summer time, shawn x goth gf/oc

AN: holy fuck its the season finale. yup this is the last chapter. imma keep writing tho... oh btw this is just smut

masterlist

"Kiss me."

"You don't have to tell me twice," I breathed out before picking my head up to connect our lips together. My hands went to either side of Shawn's face, keeping him as close as I possibly could. I was desperate for something more than a simple peck, and I was determined to get it now that Shawn was back to where he normally was.

His big hands moved down my thighs and under my knees, hooking both of my legs around his waist. In the same move, Shawn moved his hands underneath me, tightly gripping my butt. My stomach fluttered with excited butterflies as I felt the heat from his body against mine. This went from chaste to horny so fast it was making my head spin.

I found purchase in the hair on the back of his head, letting my tongue slip into his mouth. The delicious feeling of making out with him along with the wet sounds of our mouths colliding sent me straight into the clouds. I sucked on his bottom lip just a little, and Shawn let out an equally small groan into my mouth, his hips rocking against mine once. It got me so hot I didn't know what to do with myself. I needed to hear more sounds come out of him.

We finally broke apart after a while, and a translucent trail of saliva was still connected between our lips. Shawn looked down at me with hooded eyes, his pretty lips swollen and pink like the patches on his cheeks. In a second, he was moving soft but desperate kisses down my neck, while his hand moved up my body. I tried to catch my breath as he suckled new spots onto the crook of my jaw but it kept getting knocked out of me the more he touched me. I wasn't wearing a bra underneath my black After Forever t-shirt, so Shawn was able to tweak my nipple through the fabric, making me lose my breath even more.

"You okay?" he mumbled against my neck, pausing his actions.

"Don't stop," I replied in a whisper. I slowly moved my hips up against his, my toes curling at the sensations. I wrapped my arms around his middle and put pressure on his back, wanting to feel him on top of me.

Instead, Shawn moved his mouth further down my body. He mouthed at the black cotton of my shirt, reaching my nipple. He wasn't one to shy away from using his teeth right off the bat, he knew I went crazy over the feeling. It was a reflex we both marveled at; The more he toyed with my nipples, the more my hips would buck up on their own. It didn't take long for me to pull on his pajama bottoms, or for him to tug on my shirt.

We both sat up and hastily pulled at whatever clothes we had on. Shawn was quick to get my shirt over my head, and then he was sitting back to yank off his pants. I was ready to get on my back, my front, whatever humiliating position he wanted, but he paused and stared at my nearly naked body, something twinkling in his eyes. I looked down at the scars on my abdomen, reminding myself that he actually had his mouth there. This wasn't a time to be feeling insecure on my part.

With my chin up, I leaned forward and placed my hands on Shawn's massive thighs. My eyes traveled from his crotch all the way to his eyes, letting him see whatever he wanted to see. I was nervous too. It felt like we were starting from scratch, and we had to do it right. I was able to compose myself enough to take the reins and make sure he was comfortable, like he did for me many months ago.

"You okay?" I asked softly.

He nodded. "You're just beautiful. I've missed nights like these."

That gave me the overwhelming urge to just pounce and let him have me, but instead I sat back and gestured to the headboard. "Sit here."

A smirk grew on Shawn's face as he crawled up to the front of the bed. He sat and leaned comfortably against the headboard, a knowing look on his face. I let him watch me as I pulled off my underwear, and apparently it was so attractive Shawn just had to palm himself through his briefs. I decided that at one point, I had to watch him touch himself. But that was for another time. He chewed on his lip as I crawled up to meet him, and I found my place in straddling his lap.

Tense eye contact only made things heighten even more. With a cheeky grin, I brought my hand up to his chin and pulled out his bottom lip with my thumb. His eyes were big and round, like he was ready to let me be in charge. I stared down at his lips, taking in just how pink and lovely they were and just how smug I felt knowing only I could kiss them as much as I pleased.

"Do we have condoms?" I asked, the thought smacking me upside the head all of a sudden.

Shawn blinked, clearly dazed. "Um… yeah, in the drawer. Babe, do we really-"

I placed my finger on his mouth. "Yes, my dear. We do."

He placed his hand on my bare back as I leaned over to the nightstand and pulled open the drawer. His fingers glided up my spine, giving me chills and the slightest thought to just ditch protection altogether. However, I found one square packet and tossed it onto the mattress. It helped me relax even more, so I sat up again and kissed him once again.

Shawn groaned as his hands found my tits again, thumbs rubbing fast at my nipples. Before I knew it, I was grinding on his hard cock and our breathing was way too staggered to keep our lips together. My fingers rubbed against the hairs on his chest, and I dipped my head down to his neck, biting into the skin. Shawn let out a low groan deep in his chest and tilted his head, accepting more of what I was giving him. My hips moved slowly while he remained compliant under me, his fingers slowly tracing up my spine and making my back arch.

"Mm, fuck," he mumbled as he cupped my ass cheek. "Need you, baby. God, I want you so bad."

"Touch me a little first," I told him as I leaned back, taking his hand and guiding it down between us. "Let me feel your pretty fingers."

I returned the feeling just as much. I reached into his black Calvins and squeezed his cock in my hand while he inserted a long finger into me. We both moaned out at the feeling, chasing the euphoria for the first time in far too long. My head tilted back, trying to split my focus between the feeling I was giving and the one I was receiving. But his finger was curling in just the right spot, and it only tightened my grip as I pumped his shaft. Shawn cupped my face with his free hand and insisted I look at him, coaxing me with his sweet voice. His hand was so close to my neck, it made me growl. I actually growled.

"I want your cock," I moaned, unable to control myself. "I want your big cock in me, baby."

In a split second, Shawn had both of his hands on the back of my neck and he was pulling me in closer. He had been so unnaturally passive before, and now that was gone. Perhaps he was just waiting for my domme facade to crack so he could take over. "What did you say?"

I was so thrown by his sudden change in his demeanor, I only made a stupid whiney noise. I was at a loss for words. There was my Shawn.

"Oh no, you need to say it again," he ordered, slightly tugging at the hair on the back of my head. "Tell me what you want."

My head tilted back from the pressure, and my breath hitched. "I want your big cock." My voice was small and shaky, filled with nothing but fervor. "Please… fuck me with your big cock."

"Wanna ride me, honey?" he egged on, an obvious smugness in his tone. He ground his hips upwards just slow enough to make me whine. "Is that how bad you want it?"

My head nodded, feeling the grip he had on my hair with each little movement. Shawn pulled even more and leaned in to sloppily kiss my neck when it was exposed enough. Then, he nosed his way up to my ear and spoke again in a deep voice.

"Better get fucking started, then."

I wasn't sure how or why I was so easily brought into submission, but I didn't care. I'd let Shawn order me around for hours between the sheets if it meant we would both feel so impossibly good. He sat back as I frantically pulled off his briefs. With shaking hands, I tore open the condom pack and rolled the thing down his length, making sure to keep my eyes away from him. He had gone from a sweet boy to the epitome of sexy intimidation, it was harder to keep eye contact. I was sure to pass out or combust or actually bust if I looked at his face any longer. My heart raced and my core burned as I prepared to take him like a fucking champ.

"Oh, that's it," Shawn moaned through his grit teeth as I sank down on him. A snarl came from deep in his chest as he reached around to grab my ass. "Oh, such a good pussy."

A shudder of arousal ripped through me at the sound of his words and the feeling of his cock splitting me open. I stilled for a moment, trying to relax myself and get used to the stretch. My fingers, on the other hand, practically clawed away at Shawn's chest. Red lines appeared where my nails hit, sending me even further than the clouds. I scratched even more as I slowly started to move my hips.

I won't lie, I wasn't on top very often. Shawn liked me in more submissive positions, like on my back so he could hover over me and shield me with his body, or bent over a surface so he could pull my hair and spank me as much as he wanted. Here I thought this position would get the tables to turn, but I was never more happy to be wrong.

He hissed, fingers digging into the plumpness of my ass cheek. "Oh god, baby… So good at taking my cock." He brought a quick slap to the cheek on the last word.

The movement of my hips caused the headboard to repeatedly smack against the wall, adding to the feeling where our bodies connected. I leaned back, planting my hands behind me for more leverage, and I rolled my hips with more vigor. Shawn took that opportunity to bring his fingers down to my clit. He didn't even have to do anything more, the rhythm I was going at was making me grind against the tips of his fingers.

I couldn't even form words to tell him how good he was making me feel. The only sounds that came out of me were breathy moans that coincided with Shawn's filthy words. Not to mention, the obscene sounds of our skin slapping together only added fuel to the fire. My thighs were starting to chafe and cramp, though, so I slowed down and placed my hands on Shawn's shoulders.

"Fuck, I'm getting tired," I said, panting heavily, resting my head on the crook of his sweaty neck.

He played with the long strands of hair cascading down my back, his nose touching my temple. "You're doing good, baby. Take a breather. You want some water?"

"Yes please…"

Shawn held my waist as he leaned to the side, reaching the bottle of water on the nightstand. I sat up again and took the bottle. He watched me as I took a hefty gulp, a sweet smile on his face. I was about to put the bottle back, but he grabbed ahold of it and drank the last bit of water before tossing it to the floor.

I got a good look at him now that I wasn't as occupied by his massive dick. Shawn's face and chest were blotched with red, and there were several scratch marks on his pecs. His cheekbones and collar bones were glowing with sweat, and his pink lips were swollen. He looked completely fucked, and we weren't even done yet. I didn't even wanna know how I looked. I could feel flakes of my mascara falling under my eyes, I knew that much.

With a smirk, Shawn took hold of my wrists and pulled me in closer. Our noses touched, and I felt his breath on my upper lip. Hands went up and down my body, but it was much softer than before. It was a little moment of just feeling each other without the desperation. Shawn pecked my lips, and then trailed more kisses down my neck. He didn't even hesitate to mark me up even more than he already had, leaving red and purple blotches on my collar bone. Finally, he dipped his head down to my tits, and he took a nipple into his mouth.

Like clockwork, my hips moved again from the sensation. I tangled my fingers in his hair and moaned softly, my entire body seizing up and clenching just from his mouth licking and suckling. Of course, that gave Shawn more stimulation where we connected and he groaned against my skin.

Then he smacked my ass again, indicating for me to keep it going. I pressed my hands down on his shoulders and started to properly bounce on his cock. He let go of my nipple and moaned against my cleavage, his tongue poking out to get a taste every so often. The dirty talk had ceased altogether, and it was replaced by his sweet moans that got higher in pitch the closer he got to the end. His fingers dug into my ass, leaving behind his own angry red lines on the skin. It felt so good to know he was feeling it just as much as I was.

Soon enough, he was fucking back into me, and I didn't even have to tell him. Shawn held my waist and growled deep in his throat as he thrust his hips upwards. The feeling got me tilting my head back and whimpering like nobody's business. My nails went down his chest again, making Shawn growl even more as he slipped his cock in and out of me with more vigor.

"Pretty baby," he grumbled, and then his hand was on the back of my head, harshly making me face him. "Open your eyes, baby. Fucking look at me."

The authority in his tone made me do it. My eyes opened and met his. Shawn's brows were knitted together, and his mouth was half open, intense fire in his eyes. His fingers fisted the hair on my scalp, keeping me in the position I was in.

Anytime my eyes fluttered shut, Shawn delivered another sharp slap to my ass. Our lips brushed together, but we were so caught up in the heat we couldn't properly kiss each other. It wasn't until Shawn's thrusts were staggering did I find my words again. This was when I loved to egg him on and get him to where he needed to be.

"Gonna come in me, baby?" I said breathlessly. "Gonna make this pussy yours, baby? Fucking come in me, daddy…"

Shawn squeezed his eyes shut, but only for a second before I grabbed his chin to catch his attention.

"Look at me," I said sensuously. "Look at me when you come."

"Mm, fuck!" he cried out, eyes narrowing as it finally hit him. "Aah, fuck, I love you, I love you, fuck!"

He pulled me in for a sloppy kiss, his tongue immediately finding mine, groaning into my mouth. I kept bouncing on him as I brought a hand down to my clit, now chasing my big release. Shawn kept moaning, getting a little more sensitive, and he grabbed my breast like it was a fucking lifeline. His incoherent noises alone sent me to the end, and I was clenching around him repeatedly, the heat expanding through my body. I cried out his name like a mantra, my thighs trembling with the release. As soon as it was too much for me, I pulled off of him and collapsed in the space next to him.

Shawn was quick to lie down next to me, letting me curl up into his side. His muscular arms went around me comfortingly, and he planted a small kiss on top of my head. Our legs tangled together, staying closer under the sheets. My breathing was still quick and heavy, and my body was craving affection and comfort. Shawn squeezed me once, and he gently told me that this wasn't over quite yet.

~

I wasn't sure how long I was lying on my back, staring at the ceiling in a euphoric daze until the sun creeping in through the window. The light hit my eyes, causing me to scrunch my brows and turn my head away. Shawn picked his head up in surprise, squinting at the golden light pouring into the room. Then, his gaze met mine, and we both laughed softly. We really went at it the whole night, only catching short power naps every couple of hours.

Shawn turned his whole body towards me, and I did the same. There was a bit of space between us, but our hands found one another and lazily intertwined at the fingers.

"You look like an angel," he mumbled. "The sunlight is like a halo around your body. It's beautiful."

"Well, you're glowing," I told him, "you've got that sweaty, orgasmic highlight going on."

He smiled, his fingers playing with mine. Neither of us were exactly sleepy, but we were completely fucked out. I was already feeling the ache in my legs and my back. I was so glad I didn't have anything else to worry about today.

"What's the weirdest thing I did when I was on morphine?" I asked, wanting to fill the air.

Shawn's eyes widened a little bit, and so did his smile. "You said a lot of things. None of it was weird, you were just a lot more affectionate. You hit on me in front of the nurses."

I chuckled. "I sort of remember that. What else did I do?"

He thought for a minute, and his smile faltered a little. "When you woke up from your first surgery, you kept saying that I cheated on you."

For a split second, I was confused but then I gasped. The dream and the unbearable feelings came to memory in seconds. Then, I explained to Shawn what I saw when I went under, and he was shocked.

"Why would you dream that?" he asked, pouting.

I shrugged. "I can't control the subconscious of my brain. It felt so real, though."

"You know I'd never cheat on you, right?"

"Of course, I'll kill you if you do."

He chuckled and stroked my cheek. His eyes lit up again. "When you were on drugs and delirious from your fever, you really wanted me to cup your face like this. If I pulled away, you kept my hand there."

Just as he said that, my hand went up to hold his wrist. I mean, I did love having my face caressed. There was nothing quite like the feeling of being held in such a sweet, intimate manner. It made me feel small, but not in the way I had gotten used to over the last few years. I felt small, but I also knew Shawn would put me in his pocket and protect me. Of course I wanted to feel that sense of security while I was hospitalized.

"It makes me feel safe," I told him, really milking this afterglow thing.

Shawn's smile grew. "That's the cutest fucking thing I've ever heard. I'll keep my hand here as long as you want, anytime."

The cheesy, goofy grin on my face was so unlike me. How in the hell did Shawn find a way to crack me open? How did he manage to tear my walls down? How did he make me so optimistic about what we had going on? I had never been so over the moon before. Is this how you're supposed to feel when your feelings are reciprocated?

"Remember our first date?" I asked. "When you asked me what it means to be a goth?"

"Yeah," Shawn replied. "Something about light and dark, but you couldn't find the beauty in it."

I nodded. "Yeah. There's no beauty in depression, or nightmares, or surgery. And there's far worse shit out there that make it even harder to find beauty in the dark. And that's not even the dark stuff that appeals to me."

"So what does appeal to you?"

"I could have died. It would have sucked for my parents, and for you, and probably Stella too. But for me, I could have gone on to the next thing, whatever it may be. And yeah, it scares me a little bit, because I don't know what's next. Not knowing is what scares me, not the act of death itself, and not the skulls or the upside down crosses or the cemeteries. Finding my own light in the dark things that people find strange or spooky is what's beautiful to me."

Shawn smiled at my rambling, his thumb brushing my cheek.

"And you're beautiful to me too," I added with a giggle. "You're a different kind of light."

He leaned over and kissed my forehead, and then our noses brushed together gently. "You're the beauty in the dark, honey. It's all you."

_____

AN: LMAO I LIED ITS MORE LIKE A SEASON FINALE I AINT DONE WITH THESE FUCKS JUST YET HAHAHAHA anyways let me know if u wanna be added to the taglist