#im so fcking tired of life and all the bullshit im going through

[urarakasdiary]

Can you (if your comfortable with it) write the main demon slayer trio (romantically) with a fellow demon slayer reader who dislikes unnecessary fighting/ starting fights but won't hesitate in fighting back?

Basically "You start it, I finish it"

Reader won't swing on a demon just vibing (like Nezuko) but won't hesitate to end a aggressive one.

I can imagine a reader like this getting kinda annoyed with innoske's anger and Zenitzu's cowardice and just calmly vibing with Tanjro.

Which queues both of them to get jealous, since they enjoy the calm vibing with Tanjro.

(Sorry it's a really complicated thing lol)

I've always had this idea in mind! in fact, I have a story in my draft, ofc, which has almost the same plot as this! also my first request :0

jealous Zenitsu x reader x Inosuke

You've always thought the Demon slayer Crop was pretty messed up and wrong. How come when people kill each other, go to jail stay locked up for a while, and then set free, while demons, who are trying to get food, need to be given a death penalty? You always had the same mindset ever since your mother - a former hashira introduced you to the world of demon slaying.

With your cold attitude and your shyness, It's always been hard for you to find friends or even people you share the same thoughts with. Until you met Tanjiro, Tanjiro had almost the same thoughts as you. He had pity and respect for demons. He knew that they were once human too and that they probably had horrible lives before.

being friends with Tanjiro meant being friends with the wild boar and the massive simp guy. You had made it crystal clear to them that you didn't like them. Inosuke was too loud and arrogant while Zenitsu cried too much and was loud as hell too, Inosuke had grown quite fond of your personality and you yourself, you were not the finest maiden in town but - you were without a doubt beautiful. Your cold eyes just seemed to have attracted the wild boar.

Zenitsu on the other hand loveeeddd the way you would pick him up or cuddle him (you were actually holding him on the waist when he was injured) when he needed it. He was a massive simp, a gigantic one for you though.

The three of them had noticed how you wouldn't kill demons who were just doing their thing, walking out in the moon, or even eating a human. You wouldn't attack them unless they started the fight or the human they were eating had a slight chance of survival. when they asked why you would shrug it off saying 'they were just eating their food, and the person was already dead so why bother? I don't want to waste my energy on some demon just living their life, geez'

Tanjiro was fine with it, But the other two were really starting to piss you off and get you to your last straw. You didn't talk to them for weeks, Tanjiro being the only person you would talk to.

When they tried sparking up a conversation with you, You would ignore them till they were tired of talking to themselves. 'talking to a rock is better than talking to [name] she doesn't answer me at all!' -Zenitsu

There were Jealous. Inosuke had never had this feeling before, It was a bit weird for him to be jealous. 'if this Monjiro guy can get [name's] attention so can I!'

when the two of them found out about having feelings for the same person they almost had a battle to death, But it soon calmed down when Zenitsu mentioned how you were only talking to Tanjiro and ignoring them.

even though everyone knew You nor Tanjiro had feelings for each other and that you remained as a very good friend of his, they couldn't help but be filled up with jealousy and hatred towards the red-haired boy.

Inosuke made a plan to kidnap you, the thunder boy didn't like the idea saying it would make you hate them more. Inosuke couldn't do anything more than just agree with him.

Zenitsu would act sick or even hurt himself to get close to you and feel your touch on his skin.

Inosuke would try to be calmer and less arrogant around you, for a miracle of a chance that you might actually like him back.

They would be more aware of how they were looking around you-(good or bad?)- Inosuke would wear his boar mask slightly less since he knew he was gorgeous. (which he is)

You wouldn't lie you were shocked by how stunning Inosuke was, You would hang out with Inosuke more than before noticing the changes in his behavior. Zenitsu was an exception though since he didn't change one bit.

he noticed How you, Inosuke, and Tanjiro were always together, he couldn't help but be felt left out. He felt sad, miserable, and depressed. how could you? more importantly, how could they?

He would cry himself to sleep while Inosuke would spend his time with you, going out on missions and talking to you all night until his heart was pleased. He made a brave move one night laying his head on yours, you genuinely smiled laying your's back on his and closing his eyes. His eyes sparkled at your reaction, dammit, his heart was gonna pound out of his chest.

An uninvited guest was raging, crying, and screaming at the scene All the noise caught your attention you carefully held the boar's head and looked back with your cold gaze.

It was Zenitsu throwing a tantrum, You furrowed your eyebrows.

'what happened Zenitsu?'

he would then explain everything to you how sad he felt, how he cried himself to sleep, how much he liked-loved you and how much jealously he was feeling, how much hatred he felt towards Tanjiro.

You smiled at him. Expressing that it was ok to hate someone and to love someone. you slowly reached for his head and looked for his approval, of course, he nodded. you laid his head on your shoulder starring at the moon with two men on both of your sides

sorry if short I was really busy with education shit 😭

[mojitopop]

anger. resentment. hurt. heartbroken. 

so many negative feelings these days. I can’t wrap my head around it and it come back every night. every night i weep till I fall asleep. 

it’s the most difficult thing to know you’re not worth your favourite person’s time. or resources. it’s knowing that even though you spent money and flew 18 hours in a aluminium can to a country that you’ve never set foot in before, alone, met a person you barely knew and loved him with all your heart and mind and to the best of your ability. 

he turns around and says, you’re not worth my time or money anymore. sorry not sorry. 

I'm not even mad about his reasons. I understand not being able to spend as much time with me because he has to work and provide for his family. As someone who has to provide for family as well, I get that.

I just couldn’t get over the fact that he said you’re not worth the resources. I'm not worth a few thousand dollars (paid by me) flight and accommodation to come here and see me. no. everything has to go to the usa. I have to fly there to see him again. “other couples can meet for free or so much less so I don’t see why it’s worth it if not to go for 10-15 days.” but 10-15 days is too long to leave his dad alone. then bring his dad along. didn’t reply to that one.

we both know the reality of the situation. I wasn’t expecting this to last either. but yes you love reality so much, love being real so much that you prioritised being real over being compassionate. knowing full well what my reaction would be. knowing full well that I would be into full avoid abandonment mode. and whatever I do now doesn’t help jackshit. “relationship’s future is dim” yeah we both knew that before we willingly committed. your bloody mind is already made up isn’t it? that’s why you even brought the whole thing up. no “I'm going to be working a lot more, I won’t be able to spend much time with you. how can we work around that?”

no it was just ye Im going to be working a lot and we’ll probably break up because I can’t be bothered to put effort into this anymore since it’s not yielding me money. 

your cat died and so did your fcking heart.

“if in the last 4 years anyone asked what I loved about you, I would’ve said straight away, your obliviousness. you took time to think and answer.”

bullshit. I ask you like once a year and never have you said that. and yeah, I was deciding which was my favourite and which had the most impact. you think saying I love your drive is good? its weak. 

great that you stay true to yourself. wish I could’ve seen it first before I wasted 4 years of my life with you. 

and would waste 4 more if I could. I would, because that’s how much I love you. and fear being abandoned.

why do people always leave? am I not worth someone’s love or time or effort? all that nonsense about “you’re worthy, you’re loved, someone loves you” that’s bullshit. when it comes down to the matter, everyone still leaves. no matter how hard I try, I can’t keep the people that I love. bf basically is walking out the door any time, parents aren’t around forever. 

I thought of tumbling off 20-storeys again. no one would know. could slip out into the night quietly and just somersault to the ground. shatter every bone in my neck for effect. might as well be stuck in my body since im already stuck in my head. or dead. bitches should’ve gotten me help long before this.

I should’ve gotten me help long before this. maybe it wouldn’t have to be like this. and everyone says “its fine, you’ll find someone else”

you literally do not understand the 150 stages of grief someone with bpd goes through. shut up. 

I wish I didn’t have bpd. I wish I didn’t rely on you so much. I wish you would pay attention to me without me asking for it. you know how it feels to be like that? asking for attention. like a kid again. my sister got all the attention. everyone passed over me. huh, maybe that’s why I think I'm worthless. 

“you’re so precious to me” ya well if I was that precious you would’ve made the effort to put into motion processes to let you see me again, without me having to ask you like 10 times. would’ve asked to FaceTime me or something to actually see me. instead it’s been all text. no pictures. no nothing else. 

if you could transform emotions into electricity, I would power a whole country. 

I'm feeling tired and betrayed and devastated and abandoned. 

I wish I could sleep for a long time. 

[bigbrothernetflix-st]

EPISODE THREE

“this was literally one of the worst decisions i've ever had to make so now i'm just kinda pissed off!” - nash

HOH: Nash UPSIDE DOWN: Joey & Saira NOMINEES: Brianna & Gina POV: Jacob FINAL NOMINEES: Emma & Gina EVICTED: Gina (11-1), Jake (WALK)

ARIA

https://youtu.be/SyHPQkbxxw8

JOEY

WATCH THIS AGE LIKE MILK:

I feel great!!!!! Nash winning means my ass aint going up, I gave her 2 tokens, and she gave me 1, and I feel fantastic heading into this week

SAIRA

i feel okay about nash being hoh, she wasn't my first choice but i don't think im in any danger of being nominated (hopefully haha) im not sure who i WOULD want to be nominated, i just know who i wouldn't want, so as long as they're okay i'm good!

JEV

I'm once again feeling pretty good this week. I've grown pretty close to Nash since nominating her in week 1 and she told me and Nathan we aren't going up so, there's that! She's told me Gina is going up and will be her target which I'm not thrilled about but hopefully Gina can pull some miracle and win POV. I'm a little worried about Emma and Jake too, as they've both said they haven't spoken to her much which is dumb, bc like hello??? its week 3, i feel esp with Jake, I can understand Emma bc Nash keeps leaving her on read but I don't think Jake has even tried much (crying emoji) So hopefully they can ALSO pull something out

JAKE

FUCK MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i hate everyone in this game t b h. why can't people just follow with a plan and go through with it like it aint that hard to put your chips on one person from your alliance so youre all safe like........ i dont think these ppl understand strategy and it's TIRING. i frankly am over people relying on their friendships to get themselves through another week bc fucking nash won an alliance-based hoh comp. now we have to deal w this fucking friend group running the house another week. i don't know if i'm safe i'm honestly probably going to be put up??? even tho nash is the one that CONSTANTLY ignores my PMs even tho ive given her paragraphs to respond to... she's gonna do whatever her little friends want her to do. i mean that's what she literally said to me. i was like pls don't nom me <3 and she was like "im not making any promises im just doing whatever the house wants me to do" like girl............ lkjghklsdfjhg what kind of dumbass bullshit response was that. just tell me you're putting me up or you're not. youre a big girl you can make your own fucking decisions.

i give nash what i would give any hoh if they won and that is "i'd never ever nominate you it's never even crossed my mind" and hoping that's enough to make her wanna keep me. she might think im not going after her but, if she's smart, she'll send me out the door this week before i can retaliate. 

im super super worried that jacob will be like oh jev n jake aligned in BBHOS9 u should put them up together since jev nominated you week 1. like i feel like she'd do ANYTHING jacob tells her at this point cuz shes just another one of his sheep so like hoping im good w jacob but he's such a wildcard idfk

at this point im just hoping me or emma don't get put up and if we do there will be a veto to be won and a nash/jacob to come after next so...... period

ARIA

yall i feel so fucking cracked and tired of everything but itS FINE!!! I got this easy peasy!! Im not going to always feel motivated but im doing my best and thats valid baby!!! So lets jump in, first off lets start with a random information dump of things i've collected

-jacob has talked about me w/ nicholas during pasio

-monty and jacob have a connection ( i dont even remember how)

-nathan nash (maybe jacob) obviously tight lmao

-joey monty close

-Jake made a counter alliance to Jacob's (actually joshes) alliance made of me gina saira emma and josh

-josh emma me alliance

-JOEY RECORDS CALLS

-Jake is wary of nathan (but also thinks hes cute ugh)

-told jake im wary of pasio peeps so he might nom them

-Jacob alliance STILL isnt created

-called with josh and told him that jacob is wary that the alliance isnt made yet

-jacob josh have a pregame

-told josh, saira and nick have a pregame

-josh kiki close

-josh thinks saira is a social threat 

-josh prefers jev over nathan

-told monty to talk to jake more

-told joshua jacob is the most connected person

-got back to nash gina doesnt like her

-jacob kiki nash confirmed trio alliance

-nash told jev gina is the target (jev then told jake)

-josh thought jacob was the original maker of the alliance

-jake thinks jacob/josh are snakes

-jake also thinks jacob-josh-nash-kiki-bri-nick-nathan are an alliance

-josh wants to play the middle w/ me :uwu:

 So from here I want to get into how my ideal week will go and how it will realistically go. IDEALLY Nash noms jev and josh with them not winning veto and the house gets rid of a utr social threat but realistically its gonne be gina and jake with gina going bc she doesnt talk to anyone of have any motivation for this game (I LITERALLY WROTE HER A PARAGRAPH TO SEND TO NASH TO NOT BE NOMINATED AND SHE GOES "hmm idk maybe ill send it" LIKE????) 

Okay the other thing im freaking out about is bc i feel like theres tension between me Jacob Josh and Jake and im not sure what it is about. I mean i kinda do but im missing key components. The whole situation just doesn't sit right with me at all and I feel very at odds with them in a weird kinda way. I've explained this so many times but i have such a bad feeling that josh leaked the janelle alliance to jacob and is more with him than me and now josh is setting these two sides against each other and i just heard from him that nash isnt nomming him so now im really uncomfy ughhhh i have such a bad feeling and i really need to work on people like jev saira monty to make sure i have people behind me i can fall back on, but also im getting the vibe jake really really trusts me which is great because i want to go far with him as well, unless hes just misting me SUPER hard ughhh

god i just have such a bad feeling about this week buts its fINE totally fine ill work it out eventually,,,but now its trust ranking time yay

1.Gina (youre so inactive i adore you!)

2.Joshua (kid GANG!!! thank you for trusting me sometimes <3)

3.Jake (hes a crackhead but hes my crackhead)

VERY BIG GAP

4.Emma (shes chilling what a lovely gal)

5.Monty (better inactive than be active and a threat)

6.Nathan (youre kinda sketchy but hes like a funky older brother)

7.Josh (youre at the center of a balancing act i wonder if u can keep it up)

8.Nick (they always give such an honest vibe,,,,,i dont trust it)

9.Brianna (shes so sweet but the sweetest angels make the fiercest demons)

10.Jev(,,,,your on slightly thicker ice than joey but combined with a little more charisma)

ANOTHER GAP WOOT WOOT

11.Joey (youre on THIN fucking ice buddy,,,,please be more open w/ me)

12.Saira (im begging for u to talk game to me,,, but also since we havent talked u cant snake me yet)

13. Jacob (idk ily sm but youre so fcking connected and idk if i reached ur inner circle yet)

14. Kiki (my favorite furry)

15.Nash (please talk to me im begging ill do anything please plsease plaease plae-)

So update ive been talking around and wow this game loves looking at my allies and kicking them in the kneecaps while spitting in their eyes ugh. So nash is probably leaning towards nomming jake and Gina with gina as the target (really weird that jake is nommed makes me think jacob had some influence there) but in that scenario best case is that veto is used and anyone but josh goes up and that person leaves easy fucking peasy!! Anyway i just talked with josh and apparently jacob was the one who came up with the alliance idea which is interesting bc he tried to pin it on josh. Anyways not to totally contradict my initial rant but me and josh had a really good chat where we're kinda in the same position between two groups (the og alliance and janelle) and we dont know if we should make the og alliance and with who bc of janelle so we're struggling to see whats the correct move from here....or maybe josh is completely misting me but i fucking hope not ugh- either way im surviving this week and thats that!!

JEV

I'm realising that I'm getting myself into a pretty tight position since I have firm alliances with Emma & Jake and Nash & Nathan, as well as being extremely close to Josh C, which could prove difficult for me down the line, but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

KIKI

https://youtu.be/6cn8xUFWqhA

BRIANNA

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1XvZzg3dTEZ89VeFbG3bxk4JFNtr7Ixm0/view?usp=sharing 

i had to use google drive bc it wouldn't take my file on youtube :((((

JEV

So right now I've somehow accidentally wriggled my way into conspiring with Nash on how best to take Gina out, which is so dumb of me because I don't really want to see Gina leave this week, but at the same time I'm having to fight Nash's decision because she wants to put Emma up beside her and... I can't let that happen because I'm worried Emma would leave over Gina

JEV

So I'm speaking to Nash, taking the heat off of Emma by telling her I feel she could be a number for me/her/Nathan down the line, and now I'm pushing for Brianna to go up since Nash wants someone who 100% wouldn't leave over Gina and I'm thinking like... WHO would vote to evict Brianna, but at the same time I'm feeling super terrible about it because Brianna is a literal angel

JEV

Wow a lot going on so I'm trying to update as best I can, Nash is saying she's going to randomise for who goes to the upside down so I'm having to encourage her not to include me or Nathan in the randomisation just incase she needs us for strategising but REALLY its so I can stay and hang around and try my best to keep Emma from touching the block at all this week.

NASH

sorry for nominating women i didnt mean it.

EMMA

If i am being honest the more this game goes by i get so unmotivated and its only week 3 i suck because well in bbgames like galar and almia i mostly played from the bottom now im like alright i kinda want to fuck up my game for fun but kinda pisses me off a bit that i almost could of been nominated if it wasnt for jev but that pisses me off so much i tried talking to nash but i get left on read i dont take things 100x personal unless if somebody is being mean like laughing etc but knowing that i would be on the block over brianna when i did try talking to nash its still hurts a little but if somebody like gina wins veto if i get on the block it issss what it isss i guess but i played on the bottom way to many times maybe i can do this??

JEV

So my efforts worked and Brianna went up instead of Emma, now I've just gotta hope neither of the noms win POV/that the POV isn't used so I don't have to throw someone elses name out there to Nash :flushed:

JOSH

hello ladies and gays. straights aren't welcome here.

today, we are feeling GOOD because the person we nominated just a few days ago won power and STILL didn't nominate me. is that iconnery or what? i was honestly ready for my ass to be TOAST but i did approach nash before they won HOH and had a conversation about where we stood and they said i would be OKAY this week bc we did start talking. we love to see it, yes we do!

the nominees this week are gina and brianna and.. even though i'm in two different alliances with both of them, i'm not mad at either of them going up. i don't REALLY talk with either and i'd be happy to see either one of them go. the tricky part will be figuring out WHO to vote when the time comes, but we have a POV to happen before we get there. we'll SEE.

if i had to choose, i'd probably send brianna home simply because i find her a bit CHAOTIC where i feel like gina isn't really going to cause a lot of waves with me. she's much more quiet whereas brianna is more likely to be able to pick herself back up.

some other fun events going on:

jake was NOT happy about nash winning and thought he was going to get nominated because of it. he was about to RIP nash a new one and is really brewing with how much he hates them. MAKES ME LAUGH A LIL BECAUSE IT WAS SO UNWARRANTED BUT NEVERTHELESS, it's something to note that jake does NOT like nash.

i think aria is my number one right now bc we get along really well and have very similar opinions. i'm really open with how i talk to her so i'm HOPING she's not spilling everything i say to someone else but i don't think she WOULD? i dunno. i love her energy and i'm hoping we can SLICE AND DICE together in the middle.

my strategy is to take my HOH under my belt and take a step back for a minute while my two alliances (one: jake, aria, gina, emma, saira, me & two: jacob, aria, brianna, kiki, me) get picked off back and forth. i'm going to see if i can craft a narrative for them to go after each other but we'll SEE. there are a lot of people in the middle i enjoy a lot more than some of the people in my alliances so IDK. i feel like some people got thrown into these alliances that i did NOT want but they were kind of forced in so i don't trust it. and i think people KNOW because i'm not very chatty abt it in the chats (and i haven't even made one of the chats. am i supposed to? idk)

anyways that's all for now x 

ARIA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zp71zzR-wgE

someone help

JAKE

https://voca.ro/g2ZQWs9x8du

JEV

Not miss Nash coming to me asking how I'd feel about being renom :flushed:

JEV

So I literally just woke up from a sleep and in the space of 30 minutes have had to talk Nash out of renomming me, Emma or Jake since we've just made an alliance together so I warned her that probably wouldn't work out for us in the long run. We narrowed it down and she shortlisted Aria, Josh C, Monty & Nick, and I have spun her to try and get her to nominate Aria, because 1. I don't wanna see Josh C go up and 2. like with Brianna I feel nobody here would vote to evict Aria, and Nash wants Gina GONE (crying emoji) so I feel this was the only logical renom to suggest.

JEV

The conversation has turned back to Emma and I just really don't wanna let that happen because I do feel like she'd leave over Gina. Part of me is saying not to stick my neck out too much to save Emma but at the same time she's my number 1 in this game and I hope she'd return the favour if she was in my position.

NASH

this was literally one of the worst decisions i've ever had to make so now i'm just kinda pissed off! 

ARIA

Well,,,, FBSFJDF I feel like im making so many of these but honestly this game changes everyday so please dont be too annoyed by me uwu, the mood swing i had just this DAY was insane so lets begin w/ the general info-

IN TIME LINE ORDER

-Jev told jake that something about noms but acted dumb when I asked

-Gina/Joshua/Aria alliance created!!

-Saira and Josh are close

- VIDEO DR GOES HERE

-Jake spills Emma-Jev-Nathan-Nash-Jake alliance with Emma/Jev/Jake being a trio as well= Jev created the alliance

-Jev prefers gina out

-jake doesnt believe in screenshots or recording calls

-Jev and Jake are close

-Jev/Jacob/Jake all played together before

-I leaked Bri's backups to Jake as well as Jacob's trio with Nash and Kiki

-nash almost backdoored jev bc he wasnt responding to her

-jev was the reason i was almost otb

-I WAS ALMOST OTB

-Josh AND Jacob both want Jake out

-Bri thinks nash's comp ability is scary

-Nash and Nick are close 

-Jacob nervous about Bri's backup leaking

-Jacob barely talks w/ saira and monty

-made a final three w/ jacob josh called malibu

So now im debating whether its morally okay for me to analyze what happened in the living room in a game sense. FBSdffan So lets run down things in chronological order and I might mention my thoughts if they arent too controversial, Nathan leaks the alliance with jev/nash/jake/emma. Eventually emma says 'i wanna know who put these thoughts in the hohs head" and nick starts to shut the discussion down which is an interesting contrast to their earlier attitude where they were very for the drama continuing, which leads me to begin they had some sort of hand in it. Nathan goes on to say he likes nash on a personal lvl which jake analyzes as a nod to a friendgroup and a mini confrontation between nathan and jake occur. I believe that part was just a misunderstanding on both parties account. Then happy discussion until Jake calls nash out for being in the diary session for too long which leads to a discussion of house guests over analyzing production and using that as a strategy which is ultimately unfair and also at this time I believe nash was going through itTM leading to their friends to be slightly defensive on their behalf (which is valid) and i after rereading things i really hope that they're okay, ultimately this leads up to frustration on Jake's part and his ultimate quit. 

I mean where do i go from here? I have the Bri's angels but that did get leaked to Emma on Jake's way out so i need to figure some way to micromanage that where i think im gonna make a emma jev alliance and work with them as a trio in the future (if gina goes) but rn i feel like this force of energy that is Bri's backups is gonna body for a bit but i think theyre gonna throw hoh leading me jev or emma to step up and body a bit. Like i think i might actually win hoh and nom nash and monty with a nick potential renom bc im BORED and nash continuing to skate by without even talking to me is not valid, and monty is so not here its like??? HEWWO??? but idk thats making big moves i may just chill a bit for now but i dont want jev and emma being targeted in the future bc theyre gonna be numbers for me and thats on PEWIOD!

HOST WEEKLY CAST ASSESSMENT

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L25lY813N1k&list=PLFEwPPy8j010XXwntq80VSU0qLNTNpSIN&index=4&t=0s