#it’s like venting all the ugliest parts of myself and then filing them away
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my twt drafts are so 💀💀
#girlfriends mentally ill#it’s like venting all the ugliest parts of myself and then filing them away#i have levels of myself that like i feel like if people knew it’d be fine it’s not important enough to me if you know#but then like the ugly shit#the stuff i’m so close to saying out loud but then chicken out bc like if people knew that i don’t think i could look anyone in the eye#i draft it#or i use my old spam/privates#and it’s like#stuff so bad that sometimes i’m like damn maybe i need help#maybe i should tell someone#but at the same time#💀💀#and it’s with everything i share even if i admit yeah i’m in the gutter rn#it’s like .. everyone else deals with their problems themselves and yeah it can get bad and toxic but why can’t i deal with it on my own too#why am i so fucking weak that i can’t deal with myself … i piss myself off so much over this all the time. like why do i have to open my#mouth and embarrass myself like that why can’t i just shut up#and deal with it#everyone else can so why can’t i be strong enough to do it too#and mostly i keep it in just to prove to myself i can even though i’m like . staying up till 3 and feeling so sick of myself i could throw#up#anyways#im experiencing a crash rn#💭
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