#its getting a bit tedious to scroll through it all i might end up sorting them into subfolders

[rillette]

you were in my dream last night and for some reason in the dream i was going through your files and you had folders of screenshots organized by character and i went to your hal folder and you only had like 5 hal screenshots. care to explain yourself 🤨🤨🤨🤨

YOU PEOPLE ARE STILL DREAMING ABOUT ME??? my aoe effect (inescapable).....

Also how the fuck did your subconscious know that I sort my screenshots by character and series. Crying.

[diyunho]

The Joker x Reader - “John Wick” Part 3

Y/N left The Organization 3 years ago for the one reason strong enough to make her settle down: love. But after tragedy crushed her to pieces, she decided to leave The Joker and seek refuge with an old friend and mentor - John Wick. Needless to say The King of Gotham can’t accept his wife running away without a word, especially since he didn’t have a chance to tell her things she might want to hear.

Part 1     Part 2

The Joker listens at the bedroom’s door, impatient to have a conversation with you. It seems you are engaged into a fervent phone call with Winston and figured he shouldn’t interrupt.

“Please, anything you can discover would be a great help! U-hum… U-hum… Thank you,” and you hang up, which queues your husband to walk into the room.

You completely ignore him, scrolling through the numerous text messages you sent to your connections; several are already answering back and hopefully you can get some news soon. The more people are involved into the project, the more chances to find Kase and untangle the mystery of what happened to him after he was removed from the car.

“You left me there,” The Joker sneaks in and closes the door behind him. “Luckily we had Wick with us so he gave me a ride.”

No reaction. He takes a deep breath, trying to get your awareness.

“I didn’t sleep with Evelyn; sex wasn’t the reason why I kept visiting her. I know how that asshole made it sound and he was totally out of line!”

You quickly glance at him, busy replying to Ares since you feel you’re going to explode soon.

“The only skill I was interested in is the fact that she is an excellent painter and a popular art smuggler, OK?” J raises his voice, sort of annoyed you neglect to participate into his monologue. “I did not cheat, alright?” he approaches his wife. “First of all: I’m VERY picky! Second of all: why would I want a woman everyone else had?! I don’t like used toys. Third: nobody’s been polishing my gun as you tastefully addressed the issue! I have one Queen and I married her!!”

A little bit of doubt in your eyes and he utilizes the opportunity.

“You said you saw me going to her house? I did! The Bowery King asked if it was for the last 6 months? Yeah, I did! You know why?!”

At least now The Joker got your attention: you play it cool but he guesses you’re torn apart by his confession.

Many unfortunate events crammed in lately and hating the man you love made life infinitely more unbearable.

“Why…?” you barely muster the strength to inquire and he sees it as a possibility to mend a few broken pieces; although you can hide your emotions well, J can still read between the lines.

Maybe that’s why he answers with another question:

“Do you realize there are just three Monet paintings in circulation on the black market in the entire world? You admire his work and it took a lot of effort and a substantial fortune to acquire The Water Lily Pond painting. Evelyn Black helped with the transaction, then I had her make some modifications to the original masterpiece.”

You keep staring at The King of Gotham, uncertain about the stuff being tossed your way: is he lying or telling the truth?... In your line of work translating feelings is a huge part of the job; ultimately you had the best mentor to teach you the ropes when you started with the organization: none other than the legendary Baba Yaga. Despite his reputation and to your own amazement, John was one of the few hitmen with integrity and perfectly mastered the aptitude of not being a jerk. Such a rare gem… And blissfully unaware of it himself.

On the opposite end, The Joker is a jerk and flawlessly acquainted with his own “captivating” personality that made you fall in love with him anyway.

Also, doesn’t appear to be deceitful for the moment.

And you despise yourself even more for wanting to believe him.

“What… modifications?...” you throw him a bone and J is definitely not going to pass on the alternative of explaining his actions.

“I wanted to surprise you so I took advantage of Miss Black’s capabilities in the art field; I had her add small images to the authentic canvas: an evolution of you being pregnant, the nine frames culminating with a tenth: the new mother holding our son. Similar to a timeline,” he emphasize and you look intrigued, which might be a positive sign. “Needless to say it was tedious, difficult work, especially because she had to apply special pigments you can’t find at every corner of the street. Apparently you can’t mix old paint with contemporary shades, thus I had to order aged, special colors from Italy, Spain and France. That’s why I went to her place so often: I had to supervise the long process and make sure it turns out astonishing. Then…” and The Joker pauses,”…Kase was gone and I didn’t know what to do with my gift: bring it home or not? Would you have loved it? Would it make you sadder? I continued to drive to Evelyn’s and glare at the stupid painting for hours, undecided on what to do…”

J watches you bite on your cheek, then straightens his shoulders as you utter the words:

“… … … You ruined a genuine Monet?”

Your spouse might be a smooth talker when needed, yet he’s not wasting his versatility on this statement:

“I didn’t ruin it; I made it better!”

Silence from both parties. A good or bad omen? Hard to decipher the riddle with two individuals tangled into a relationship that somehow worked despite countless peculiarities meant to keep them apart.

“I have to talk to Jonathan,” you finally mutter and The Joker steps in front of you.

“Talk to me!”

“Unless you know the exact location of the suitcase full of gold coins he’s been safekeeping for me, I really have to speak to him. Or do you want to hammer the whole basement searching for it?”

Y/N walks out of the bedroom and J lingers inside, evesdropping on the conversation happening downstairs. He can’t understand the chat, but you are probably notifying John about the details your husband left out.

Might as well join the party, therefore The Clown pops up in the living room with a plea impossible to refuse:

“Hey Wick, can I stay here? I don’t care if you say no, I’m not going to leave.”

Your friend crosses his arms on his chest, focusing on the random topic:

“How could I deny such a polite request? Of course you can stay Mister Joker; my house is your house.”

You’re watching the free show unamused; usually it would make you smile…now you lack the depth for such connotations.

“Don’t get smart with me, Wick!” J growls and Jonathan pushes for a tiny, unnecessary quarrel.

“I’m not; although generally speaking, I fancy considering myself a smart guy.”

The Joker opens his mouth and you’re not in the mood for whatever the heck they’re initiating:

“I’m going to pump, then after you dig out the suitcase I’ll take half to the Bowery King,” you announce your plans to them.

“You can do that and rest; I’ll deliver the coins,” John immediately offers. “I can stop by Aurelio’s car shop and ask for his collaboration: he has a lot of associates, doesn’t hurt to get him involved. You have plenty of gold.”

“I have two more suitcases in the Continental’s safe and two more at The Penthouse. It doesn’t matter if it’s all gone as long as I can find my son.”

“I know gold coins are preferred; don’t forget we have a lot of money too,” J reckons with spite.

Is he reminding you or Jonathan?...

*************

Your husband spent the last hour in the garden, talking and texting with a lot of people; needless to mention he’s capitalizing on his network also. Winston disclosed Stonneberg’s contract is still opened, meaning the son of a bitch is out there; you have to scoop him before anybody else does.

“Y/N…” The Joker tiptoes in your quarters. “I thought you were taking a nap,” he huffs when he sees you at the edge of the bed.

You glare at the vial on the nightstand, sharing your idea for a future you wish will come true:

“I didn’t have my medicine in two days; I won’t take it anymore because if we get Kase back… I will nurse him. It all goes in the milk and I want to be able to feed my baby… Do you think his little heart is still beating?...” you sniffle and J is currently debating on a clever response since his mind is blank; one could deduce messing up is encoded in his DNA, but on such a huge scale… well, it gives new interpretations to the term even for him.

The grieving woman seeking reassurance for their loss is trying to make sense of the pointless occurrences that lead to Kase being an innocent victim and The Joker can’t render clarification: he has no clue why he asked her to marry him and why she said yes, it’s not that he’s husband material or a family man. Perhaps Y/N thought he could be… just enough to get by, that’s why she accepted his proposal.

Most women would have cringed at the concept. Most women. Not Y/N.

Most women would have flinched at the notion of having his baby. Most women. Not his wife.

Above all, she trusted J with their son and he treated the three weeks old like a trinket: didn’t drive him home because he had an important meeting, didn’t bother to assign escorting cars nor extra security. The King of Gotham took his child’s safety lightly and it definitely had severe consequences. Too late now to fix past mistakes... but he can attempt.

“You’ll be able to nurse him, OK?” he sits by you and hands over his cell. “Can you enter your phone number in here? Or am I not allowed to have the present digits?”

You’re hesitant and he slides the screen while you hold the gadget.

“Lemme help you,” The Joker sarcastically mumbles. “It should be the first on my list, right where the old number you canceled was.”

You exhale and fulfill his demand out of pure frustration when he squeezes in a second innocent petition.

“Chose my avatar.”

You grunt at his rubbish, scrolling through his folders for a picture anyway; J hopes the largest file will get your attention and that’s the point. How could Y/N miss it?!

Entitled “Baby”, the humongous cluster of pics contains 5,723 items. You open it quite absorbed by its size; what’s more puzzling is the collection depicting Kase’s ultrasounds, hundreds of frames with you being pregnant taken without you knowing: there’s a few when your ankles were so swollen you had to sleep with your feet up on 4 pillows, others with you munching on strange food you craved, more with you in the shower focused on your bump, a decent amount of couple selfies when you were sleeping and J had to immortalize the moment without waking you up and approximately 1,500 images of the newborn.

“You didn’t gross me out when you were pregnant,” The Joker reminds a teary Y/N. “Not sure why you would believe such aberration...” he pulls you on his knees and yanks the phone away, tossing it on the nightstand. “I would also like to underline I didn’t have an affair with Miss Black, alright?”

J lifts your chin up, forcing to look at him.

“Let’s put it this way: why would I fuck around with another woman when I have a wife at home that wants to kill me on a regular basis, hm? Where would the fun be? I mean, she didn’t pull the trigger yet but it’s exciting to hope she might. You know me: I’m a sucker for thrills!”

“Do I?”

“Huh?” J steals a kiss and you frown at his sleekness.

“Know you?”

“Yeah,” the green haired Clown acts composed while in fact his feathers are ruffled. Before you catch onto it he has to ultimately admit: “I’m sorry I didn’t drive the car… I should have…”

The Joker holds in his breath when your arms go around his neck very tight.

“I’m suffocating…” he grumbles. “I can’t tell if you’re trying to hug me or choke me to death,” J keeps on caressing your hair, prepared to block your attack in case you’re actually in killing mode.

This is the excitement he was speaking about: with you, one could never know until it’s a done deal.

“I bumped into Magnus at the Continental,” you give him a bit of space to inhale much needed air and The Joker is surprised at your revelation. “I had no idea about his scheme, otherwise I would have skinned him alive right on the hotel grounds! I wouldn’t have cared about the consequences!”

“I’m glad you didn’t,” J cuts you off and he can tell you’re getting mad; maybe you think he doesn’t give a damn but the reason is simple. “You would’ve been declared excommunicado for murder on neutral ground and I don’t want my wife to be the target of such punishment from the company she so proudly retired from. I need my partner!”

The King of Gotham touches your forehead with his as you whisper:

“I hate you!”

“Mmm, regarding this true love affirmation, I’m gonna need you to take a break from detesting me until we have Kase, then you can despise me full throttle again. Deal?” he extends the palm of his hand and you reluctantly shake it, not realizing you’re reacting to his nonsense. “Is that a smile?” J returns the favor with one of his creepy silver grins.

“No.”

“Liar,” he pecks your lips and can’t explain the weird feeling in his heart when you kiss him back.

*************

Jonathan enters the house and becomes suspicious after a few minutes: too much silence.

Omg! Did you and The Joker engaged into a brawling that ended up badly? Did you end each other?!

John frantically runs to the garage, nervous to see your car and J’s are still parked inside. Shit!

“Y/N?” he shouts, concerned about your fate; The Joker’s… irrelevant. Nobody in the garden, patio is empty also. Downstairs is deserted thus he rushes upstairs to your room. The door is not completely shut and he slowly pushes it, knocking.

“Y/N? Can I come in?”

The first thing he notices are clothes scattered on the floor, then he halts his movement at the sight of Y/N and her husband dozing off on the bed sideways: the naked bodies are covered with a blanket, but he can tell you’re snuggled in J’s arms.

Jonathan steps backwards, guilty of invading his guests’ privacy; he certainly didn’t expect to intrude in such a manner and softly closes the door, grateful it’s not what he feared.  

You and The Joker are so worn out the sound of your phones vibrating on the nightstand doesn’t wake you from the deep sleep. Your numerous contacts keep replying back to the text messages, the most important one showing up on his cell: one of the people J reached to is Evelyn Black and the two sentence conversation lights up the screen.

“Let me know if you see Stonnenberg.”

“He’s here.”

 Also read: MASTERLIST

You can follow me on Ao3 and Wattpad under the same blog name: DiYunho.

[17piesinseptember]

“Is This A Dare?” | Part V + VI

A Zimbits College AU | part I | part II | part III  | part IV

Part V

It's not a long bus ride but without his phone or music it feels that way. Bitty taps his fingers against his lips, remembering leaving his phone number for Jack—a number that goes to a phone he doesn't have anymore and might not get back soon, if ever.

He should have left his email address instead. His personal one, not the uni provided one Jack probably has access to anyway.

Bitty groans aloud and crosses his arms. An email isn’t better. He shouldn’t have left anything. He rests his head against the window, not caring about the countless others who must have done the same before him, adding his own oily marks on the pane.

Stupid, he thinks to himself. What point is leaving contact information anyway. He and Jack aren’t friends and there’s no reason after last night for Jack to stay in contact with Bitty. He did his good deed. Bitty shouldn’t want to ask more from Jack after all that, especially after Jack’s speech about classroom hierarchy and relationships.

Bitty sighs and readjusts his forehead on the glass. It’s incredibly uncomfortable but he holds it for a moment so he can't confess to himself the real reason he gave Jack his number. (There’d been one moment picturing a hopeful vision of him and Jack in some fantastical future and it was so strong he’d turned and written his number of a bit of paper.)

Bitty groans and buries his face in his hands trying to force away his embarrassment. He spends so long with his head in his hands he misses his dorm by two stops and has to retrace his steps. He takes his time because he knows when he makes it to the dorm he'll have to face the reality of his situation. He'll need to replace his key, cancel his cards, hope and pray all his photos have been uploading to the cloud.

Thankfully, they keep the main dorm doors open during the day, so Bitty is able to get into the building and up to his room. His roommate lets him in when he knocks and Bitty feels a sliver of relief that he was in to do so. Bitty grabs fresh clothes from his dresser and his shower kit. He loses track of time as he washes, the hot water soothing some of the tension he's been carrying since last night.

Back in his room, feeling refreshed if not better, Bitty takes inventory. It turns into an incredibly long afternoon, equally as tiring as the other night. Bitty does every bit of tedious organising he can bear, thankful he'd left his laptop behind the other night and can do it all from the privacy of his room, where no one is around to see him swear and cry and punch his pillow in equal parts.

His new student card takes a day to make so he has 24 hours without access to the mess hall. (He says a quick thank you to Jack for his pancakes when he learns that.) He has a few tubs of yoghurt in his mini fridge and half a dozen eggs which he views as literal lifesavers because he hasn't figured out yet how he's going to pay for things without getting a new card or phone.

As Bitty sits on his bed eating a yoghurt, debating whether or not to message his parents, he finds himself looking forward to Monday. He hopes his classes can distract him, starting with his women and food class first thing in the morning. With Jack.

Part VI

Bitty wakes hungry to the tapping of his roommate on his door.

"Thanks," he grumbles, grateful his roommate agreed to be his alarm today until he figures out a better way to do it.

He can't get into the mess hall without his new card, so he grabs yet another yoghurt from the fridge and eats it in his bedroom while he packs a new bag for today, apologising to his mother’s voice in his head reminding him that breakfast is the most important meal of the day.

For the first time ever, Bitty is the first one in the lecture theatre. Not even the teacher is there. He opens his laptop and refreshes his email, hoping to see one from student services saying his ID card is ready for collection. There's nothing there.

Bitty opens his notes for the class and surprises himself by becoming bored enough to read over them. Twitter felt wrong on his laptop.

Eventually, students start coming in. Bitty tries to tune out their conversations but it's more interesting than revision. He spends a few minutes scrolling sporadically to keep up appearances while eavesdropping on a conversation about a weekend trip one of the sport teams took. He's so engrossed he misses someone clearing their throat beside him, and it's not until that person leans over and puts their arm along the back of Bitty's chair that he shifts his attention.

Bitty lifts his head to see Jack looking at him. From very close up. This is probably the closest Bitty's ever seen him, closer than sitting beside each other in Jack’s car, and he can't help but notice Jack's eyes are incredibly blue.

"Can I see you after class?" Jack asks, keeping his voice low.

"Uh," Bitty flushes, having to try very consciously not to drop his eyes to Jack's lips. Or his jaw line. Or his shoulders. "Yes. Okay."

Jack's probably not intending his question and posturing to cause Bitty's abdomen to contract but it does anyway.

"Meet me down front after," Jack instructs, then continues down the stairs to his seat in the front row of the lecture theatre.

Jack doesn't look at him again during the lecture at all. Bitty tries not to look at Jack so frequently but can't help it because he keeps thinking about what Jack wants to see him about. He couldn't read enough in Jack's tone to know and doesn't know enough of him to guess. The closest he can manage is that Jack wants to talk to Bitty about him leaving his number. He’s not sure he’s up for sitting through Jack's "I don't date students" speech again.

By the end of the lecture, Bitty's notes are appalling and only fill half a page. Bitty tries to take his time packing up but without his normal bag with its extraneous content, he's done very quickly. He gets up and makes his way against the current of people down to the front where Jack's stacking sheets of paper together into a folder.

"Hi," Bitty announces his presence, sitting in the seat two along from Jack.

"Hey, Eric," Jack greets, closing the folder. "You got home alright yesterday then?"

Bitty nods. "Thanks for the bus money."

Jack smiles, gathering his bag and papers. "There's a class coming in here. Do you mind coming with me to the TA offices?"

"Oh. Ah, sure," Bitty says, standing up again and following Jack out of the lecture hall.

They pass a coffee cart on the way and Jack breaks the silence between them to offer to buy Bitty something.

"Do you want a coffee? Muffin?"

Bitty scoffs reflexivity at the offer of a baked good.

"I take that as a no?" Jack asks.

Bitty clears his throat. "Sorry. I didn't mean to—It's just the muffins aren't—But yes. That's a no. Thanks, though."

Bitty has never been to the TA offices. He assumed Jack would share a room with Professor Atley, but if turns out he’s in a larger communal office area with several desks spread around the walls.

"There's eight of us in here," Jack tells Bitty as he leads him around a large table in the middle of the room toward a desk in the back left corner. Jack sits down at his desk and puts his bag under the table beside a filing cabinet.

"That seat's free." Jack gestures behind Bitty to the neighbouring desk. Bitty wheels the chair over and sits, keeping his bag on his lap so he has something to do with his hands.

There's a meticulously organised bookshelf behind Jack's desk that gives them a small bit of privacy from the other two TAs currently in the room. Jack keeps his voice soft as well when he speaks, though Bitty is beginning to understand that's just how he is.

"Sorry for dragging you here," Jack starts. "I thought it would be better not to do it in front of the class."

Bitty does not like that as an opening sentence. He didn't really think Jack was going to reprimand him again for the contents of his note, but maybe Bitty's life is just that way now. One bad, uncomfortable thing after the other.

Bitty swallows and twists the strap of his bag around his hands. He tries to keep his breathing as even as possible but when he concentrates on doing so, he only seems to achieve the exact opposite.

Jack reaches to the bookshelf and pulls out a tin container covered with Van Gogh prints. Bitty's forehead furrows as he watches Jack pull a small ring of keys out and turn to the filing cabinet beneath his desk. He unlocks the largest draw. Bitty bites his lip.

"I hope you don't mind that I've kept them in here," Jack tells Bitty. "I don't think it's the conventional way this is done but I, er, didn't think about it when they called me."

Jack's back is to him, blocking Bitty's view of what's in the filing cabinet. When he finally spins around, Bitty's eyes drop to his lap and his lips part. "That's…"

"Yours," Jack finishes for him, hands around a brown leather satchel bag. "I checked when I went to collect it."

Bitty presses his lips together and goes back to focusing on his breathing.

"Sorry," Jack apologises. "I should have contacted you first. I actually… Well. I did, but then I realised." Jack pushes a hand through his hair. "You'll have a text from me. I didn't realise until after I sent it how stupid that was."

Bitty shakes his head. "Not stupid."

"I knew I was going to see you this morning, so at that stage I didn't bother emailing."

Bitty's eyes are still on Jack's lap. He reaches out—his hand unsteady—and Jack passes the bag across to him. His bag. The one he lost two nights ago.

"Is it-" Bitty clears his throat. He looks up at Jack, not sure which emotion his face is choosing to display; his weariness, relief, worry, gratitude.

Bitty takes a deep breath. "Is it just the bag?"

"Wallet and phone in there too."

Bitty exhales roughly. All that time wasted on the weekend sorting everything out and he doesn't even care. He's holding his bag.

He flips it open and looks through. Notebooks, pencil case, earphones, lip balm, even the plastic wrapped cookies he'd packed as a snack. He pulls his wallet out and opens it. By some miracle, all his cards are in there, from his credit card to his old library card. There's no cash but he didn't think he'd had any in there anyway.

"I'll go, er, make some tea," Jack says quietly, standing up and edging past Bitty.

"You don't have to," Bitty tells him but he takes too long to voice it, still pulling cards in and out of his wallet, and Jack's long gone.

Bitty's phone is dead but it's definitely his. Beyonce lyrics on the case and the crack on the screen across the bottom right corner. There's a phone charger plugged into the wall at Jack's desk. The connection is wrong for Bitty's phone but he keeps one in his bag which is also still in its usual pocket. He gets it out and switches the cords, hoping Jack won't mind.

Jack's still in the kitchenette so Bitty looks around his desk, waiting for his phone to have enough charge to turn on. The desk itself is mostly empty, with a whiteboard against the side wall filled with notes and print outs of timetables, and a tray filled with essays on the other side. The bookshelf shows more personality, with a few succulents on display among the alphabetically ordered books.

There's two framed photographs on the second top shelf which Bitty stands to get a better look at. He recognises where the first is taken because he was in Jack's house just the other night. Jack isn't in the picture himself, but the TV set up and couches are an exact match. Three men and a woman sit crammed on the couch that faces the TV, all craning their necks to look at the camera. There’s a video game paused on the TV but Bitty can’t tell which. The second photo is Jack and another man—one from the first photo, with the moustache—in graduation robes on the Samwell green, holding diplomas.

"That was my graduation for my undergraduate degree."

Bitty turns. Jack's holding two mugs of tea. Bitty maneuvers around him in the small space between Jack's desk and the bookshelf, sitting back on the spare seat.

"Milk?" Jack guesses, putting one down closer to Bitty and keeping the black tea for himself.

"Thanks, Jack." Bitty pulls the mug closer to him. "You really didn't have to."

"It wasn't a problem." Jack smiles at Bitty. "So was everything there?" Jack asks, nodding to the bag.

"Yes, yes it was." Bitty throws an arm over the bag in his lap and pulls it tighter against his body.

"I'm glad." The way Jack smiles at Bitty makes his heart flip over.

"Me too. I feel like I owe you a million thank yous for getting it,” Bitty tells Jack earnestly. “I mean, it's crazy. Like a miracle. I really didn't think I was going to see it again."

"I didn't do anything," Jack flushes, looking down at his mug and taking a sip.

"You have to have done something. Otherwise this wouldn't be here."

Jack’s fingers shift around his mug. "All I did was leave my number with the police station when I picked you up,” he rushes like it’s no big deal, spinning his chair slightly so he’s not facing Bitty front on. “I knew you didn't have your things. I said if they turned up they should call me."

Bitty watches Jack put his tea on the desk and run his thumb up and down it’s side.

“Well, it was something to me,” Bitty says softly.

Jack lifts his head briefly to look at Bitty. Bitty’s heart does its little flip up and over again.

"Okay then,” Bitty says cheerily, trying to move on from the overly sentimental moment. He doesn’t want to make Jack uncomfortable by pushing any hint of feelings toward him.

“Not a million thank yous,” Bitty continues, sitting up in his chair. “What about one pie?"

Jack blinks. "Oh."

"That's means you're thinking about it, right?” Bitty smiles. He’s missed Jack’s ‘oh’. “Thinking about saying yes?"

Jack shakes his head, spinning his chair back to face Bitty. “I was thinking that I remember the pie you brought in when you bribed your way into the course.”

Bitty flushes at the accusation and the way Jack’s mouth lifts up in one corner like he’s teasing him.

Bitty raises his mug in front of his face, trying to hide his heated cheeks. “I wouldn’t call it bribing,” he says sheepishly.

Jack laughs. “Oh, it didn’t bother me.”

Bitty raises his eyebrows at Jack.

“No, I mean—Obviously bribery isn’t something I’m condoning.” Bitty bites his lip as Jack flusters trying to explain. “I just meant it was a really good pie.”

Bitty nods, trying not to laugh at Jack’s expression.

“That came out wrong,” Jack says, shaking his head.

“So, that’s a yes to a thank you pie?” Bitty asks instead of teasing Jack more about it.

Bitty doesn’t wait for Jack’s ‘yes’, already set on making him one from back when Jack first collected him from the station. “What’s your favourite pie?”

“Oh.”

Bitty can’t help but smile at the sound.

“I’ve never thought about it,” Jack frowns. “I’m sure anything you make will be good.”

Bitty didn’t think his cheeks could get any warmer, but at Jack’s quiet compliment his body proves him wrong. “Okay. A surprise pie then. I promise it’ll be good.”

“I never said yes to the thank you pie,” Jack points out.

Bitty shrugs. “I never said yes to the tea.”

“But tea is much easier to make than a pie.”

Bitty laughs. “Not to me.” His heart flips over again. It seems to have decided he and Jack are teasing each other. Like friends.

[on to Part VII]

[amazildoessomethingstupid]

Chapter 95: Love Again Part 2

Well boys we back on it again!  I hope you’re ready cause I’ve been spending most of this week after the response pumping out response images for this next part! So let’s waste no more time and jump right into it!

…

Oh shut up, you know you laughed at it.

So we start off with one of mah boi Bee’s favorite pages!  Just look at this great update of a page!  Just jam packed with so much stuff to sink your teeth into, and digest.   It’s a magnificent piece that is not only worth waiting 2 full days to see, but waiting 2 to 3 more days to see what’s next!  And while I was not a dedicated reader, waiting hours on end for when this page update I can only imagine how elated those readers who did wait, must’ve been to see this page!  

No wonder this chapter’s 50 pages long… AND IT CONTINUES!

Okay, okay, no I’m not really going to bitch about these splash pages and how fucking tedious and restless it would’ve made me as a serial reader to go into this.  Partly, because the way I’m reading these now and with the rant series of going chapter by chapter was all inspired by the great advice by Bear Kidney that he gave me years ago on the forum.  That the “proper” way to read BCB is as full chapters, and to just wait for them to be finished…

Which meant in order for an average person to read this “properly” they’d have to wait…

Five full months…

Sure!  But since we are reading this “properly” I will say that these splash pages do help to set the pace.  It  sets the tone for this scene pretty well and makes us slow down and appreciate what’s happening, and immerse ourselves into the past.  

But enough praise! You know what’s coming, I know what’s coming!  Let’s get to it!  I’m ready! I’m hungry for some strawberry pancakes! Let’s tear int-

Wait what?

Right when I have to transfer?  Wait, this is a flashback right?  Is she talking about the private school?  I thought we only learned about this private school thing this chapter.  What is she-

THEM?  Do what?  Uhhhhh What?!  A-am I missing something here?  This is a flashback to when Lucy attempts suicide, right?  This is after December, I thought that’s why she did that.  Is that not it?  Am I missing something?!  I THOUGHT I WAS ALL PREPARED WHAT THE HELL?  

Okay so this IS about the new school?  Okay. Why?  I thought what happened in December was enough!  Was it not enough?  Did that just push her further into this point?  Wait, no.  This had to be after December.  So the move was done because of December?  So the first course of action upon realizing Lucy had been acting depressed was to immediately move her to a new place?  No like therapy or anything?  No counseling?  What the…

Okay, hold that thought one second here, I need to resort to a third-party source on this shit.  

Hello?  Yes, I’m doing the rant and I am now not only angry but very confused!  You’ve read further into the comic than me, what the fuck is Lucy talking about here?!

….

WHAT?!  WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE WAS A SCENE WHERE THEY MENTIONED LUCY MOVING AWAY?!  I DON’T REMEMBER ANY SCENE LIKE…wait a second…

ARE YOU SERIOUSLY TALKING ABOUT THIS SCENE?!  HOLY CRAP, EVEN I FORGOT ABOUT THIS SCENE!  What the fuck?!  You mean this one little scene.   This little one-page moment shuffled in early, in a chapter that had its own memorable bits of drama and character moments that easily overshadow it; was not only meant to be a very important scene that hints at  one of the main reasons Lucy is trying to kill herself…BUT WE WERE SUPPOSED TO- NO WE WERE *EXPECTED* TO HOLD ONTO THIS ONE LITTLE BIT OF DIALOGUE FOR ALMOST FIVE FUCKING YEARS IF WE WANTED TO FULLY UNDERSTAND WHY LUCY’S ATTEMPTING TO KILL HERSELF?!  

Yeah, thinking about it I’m not that surprised, honestly.   And people think I’m crazy for looking this deeply into the comic and characters and motivations.  Apparently, I wasn’t looking hard enough!  Jesus, good thing I missed that.  If I knew that Sam was so on board with not letting Lucy have say on her treatment, or what happens to her, January would’ve crumbled apart!  Not to mention, according to this False Idol shouldn’t have happened since Lucy would’ve been moved away before the summer…

Hey by the way, do we get any follow up on what exactly Lucy did while she was in that private school? Like how was her treatment, care, and stuff?  How she was doing?

Why are you laughing?

Alright, I’m not gonna lie. I felt something there.  You got me, Taeshi.  This bit of paneling.  The build up, the expressions, it works here.  But sadly I’d be remised if I didn’t make this joke.

You know I had to do it to em’.

But instead she goes for the cannonball!  Bold move there, Cotton!  Let’s see if it pays off!

Oof!  She’s gonna lose a lot of points for not sticking the landing. But I still give it a 5/10 for style points.   Okay, okay, I joke but I gotta give props to this scene for well execution (…no pun intended)

The structure of this page is very well done, and reminds me of Korean style of web paneling which uses a lot of negative space and vertical structure to build tension, and slow down the reader’s pace by forcing them to scroll down in order to read forward.  If you’ve seen any of those Korean horror webcomics you’ll know what I mean.  It’s very effective, and it works to build this tension and intrigue into what happened.   It’s a very good trick, and Taeshi’s use of it here is very nice.  It’s just…

What….

What the fuck?  

WHAT THE FUCK?!  YOU BUILT THIS SCENE UP FOR YEARS AND THIS IS WHAT WE GET?!  YOU FUCKING HACK!  YOU WERE DOING SO WELL!  IF YOU JUST TOOK IT SLOW FOR ONE SECOND, AND NOT FUCKING GO OVER THE TOP WITH YOUR EXECUTION OF SCENES!  THE ONE TIME! THE ONE SCENE THAT DESERVED TO STAND ON ITS OWN AND HAVE A FUCKING OUNCE OF SUBTLETY AND REALISM, AND YOU COULDN’T FUCKEJWOIGHSLKDA;J

HGNGKJFJLGKFHBN LFKGJHLLJDFGKLJ;LHKGFLKJIUCUCBITCHLKJBVKJLHKJXHCVH

*WHUMP*

Uhhh…

WE INTERRUPT YOUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED RANT TO BRING YOU BIOLOGY CLASS WITH DR. CAS MARIE!

Hello, kids!  Did you know, that hidden inside every animal including you, me, and sharks.  Is this thing we call a skeleman!  And he brings with him these things called “bones”  which are integral for not only fast movement, and articulation in our moving parts, but also they help keep our vital organs safe by surrounding our heart, lungs, and livers. We’ll get more into him in a second, but just know he lives inside almost every living creature!

Well except for invertebrates….

Fuck invertebrates! Think you’re so bad, just cause you ain’t got no bones!

But anyway, beyond that skeleman has with him his best friend.  MUSCLE MAN!  Who is sort of like a squishy version of the skeleman.  He is the one who keeps the skeleman safe.  For you see kids, the skeleman’s bones are very hard, pretty dense too if you drink your bone juice!  But that hardness makes him very brittle.  That’s why muscle man is here to add a tough layer on top of the skeleman. But that’s not all he does!  He sort of acts like a bunch of rubber bands that tighten up in order to perform actions and move those lazy bones!  Cause bones can’t move themselves.  Now these muscles are controlled subconsciously through the central nervous system.  That might sound like some big words, but the central nervous system when talking about the skeleman refers to the skull as well as the central part of the skeleman.  And what’s in the center of the skeleman? 

WHY IT’S THE SPINE OF COURSE!  And directly attached to that, is the brain!  The spine serves as the main messenger for the body to tell everything else what to do!  Limbs, organs, and all that good stuff.  It’s why the spine is the most important bone of them all!  Without a spine, you would literally not function, and die.  Now I know you’re all very intrigued, but before we go any further there’s a little experiment I’d like you folks at home to try real quick!

Take your hand, and place it on top of your belly.  Now give it a nice squish, just a little jiggle.  Now lift up your arm, and squish your hey babies with the other arm.  You feel that?  Feel that squish?  Feel that jiggle?  

That’s what’s known as “fat” like when I say “You fat fucking slob.” It makes our bodies more buoyant, as well as protect our nice tight muscle man, with a pliable squishy layer right under the skin!  Now of course, some parts of the body have more fat than others, as the fat is meant to protect vital parts of the body and its functions such as the breasts, the thighs, and of course the abdomen!  While we’re talking about skin, there’s an interesting fact about skin.  You see, skin is meant to withstand blunt force very well.  Often times, you’ll notice that skin will scrape, bruise, bend, and squish, but hardly break except for certain circumstances like if you used a sharp object on it.  This is because the skin is meant to absorb and be pliable enough that it’s a bit hard to tear with blunt force.  Usually whenever it does, it’s due to the skeleman’s bones breaking and causing a tear from under the skin for the blood to come out or when it is pinched between the hard bone and a hard surface such as asphalt.   This is why you’ll often hear the term “internal bleeding” thrown around during certain traumatic injuries. Because while the skin layer hasn’t broken, there is still something inside the body that is bleeding, but it’s not coming out of the body because of the skin layer!  Not to say of course, that you can’t of course break skin through sheer blunt force trauma.  But it would take a lot of force that would most definitely cause you more problems than just breaking the skin.  Now I hope you were taking lessons back there, because POP QUIZ HOTSHOT!  I got a surprise question for you~  With everything I’ve said about the human body and how it is able to take blunt force trauma, please tell me.

HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS HAPPEN? HOW THE FUCK DO YOU SURVIVE THAT?!  AND HOW DO YOU SURVIVE THAT WITHOUT ANY LOSS OF LIMB, SCARRING, OR LASTING EFFECT?!

I’m sorry, but you can not achieve that sort of blood splatter by sheer force of gravity alone. Or if you did, then this scene should’ve been more like this!

The only explanation I’ve heard that makes any sense is that there was just some random ass rock that was there that Lucy landed on that.  Which. Okay, then.  Okay, sure.  Yeah, okay. Then how the fuck do you survive that? That is no small wound based on the amount of blood that was expelled on impact.  And if this rock is big and sharp enough to cause that amount of blood loss on impact, it would be big and sharp enough to do immense damage to the abdomen. But oh that’s alright!  It’s just the abdomen, there’s nothing going on in there! It’s just your stomach, your liver, your kidneys, your colon, your womb (if you have one) your pancreas, your bladder, y’know stuff you don’t really need.  But of course if that gets compromised, and based on the force and damage you could easily break a rib, puncture a lung, and really fuck up your life. That’s not even counting what sort of damage the fall did on her arm!  That shoulder must be fucked!  Look at how its bent even!  You’re not moving that thing any time soon! Your pelvic bone must be shattered if this is the kind of force you took.  You are now a vegetable.  But that’s not even the biggest point!  That’s not the worst part, those things?  I know some of you are gonna say, “Oh Amazil, you’re not a doctor!   She could survive that!  People survive insane things like that all the time!”

Well okay, but riddle me this.  Let’s say the rock doesn’t kill her, and by some miracle none of her internals are FUBAR right now.  She didn’t cause a bone break, and destroy her limbs.  Remember what we said about the central nervous system.  The most important bone of the body is the spine and skull.  And one of the most vulnerable parts for the spine is the neck.  If you fall to the ground with enough velocity, the whiplash you should have from your body going from 60 to 0 in an instant should cause your neck to snap or leave you paralyzed for a good second if not immediately kill you because the force of momentum would carry all that velocity to make your head connect with the ground at its resting speed.  And while I know I said that skin is very hard to tear, y’know what makes it tear or break?  When the hard contact with the ground, meets hard contact with your hard skull!  If she landed so hard on a rock that blood spew out a good foot or two in front of her, how the hell does she not crack her head on the pavement?!  And don’t you give me no bullshit about the snow either!  I’m sorry Lucy, but by all accounts.

If this scene wasn’t a flashback and we knew Lucy wasn’t dead, there would be no doubt that she was fucking dead if we saw this.  

But it seems we aren’t alone in judging this scene.  Augustus is here too! (which we kinda already know because of how this scene was set up but nonetheless).  And he’s here to say

Wait, let me take a selfie an-

No…

Oh my fucking god…

OH MY GOD!  NO!

DO I EVEN NEED TO SAY WHAT’S WRONG WITH THIS RIGHT HERE?!  

NO LUCY THAT’S NOT WHAT YOU SHOULD BE SAYING!  WHAT YOU SHOULD BE SAYING IS

Sgdslkhg;sldlkdshgknxcv;jhdf;kldgsasdn

Translation: OH GOD, PLEASE HELP THERE IS BLOOD CLEARLY POOLING IN MY MOUTH!  MY MOUTH IS FILLING WITH BLOOD!  THERE IS BLOOD IN MY LUNGS AND I CAN’T BREATHE!

Your body should be in shock right now!  You just suffered traumatic physical injury!  Your brain and body is still trying to comprehend what the fuck just happened.  You shouldn’t be this lucid, let alone this active and coordinated!  Not to mention, the first rule of dealing with someone who has suffered traumatic injury and is on the ground, is NEVER.  EVER. MOVE THE PERSON UNLESS YOU ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO, AND IF YOU DO, YOU DO IT VERY SLOWLY AND AS CAREFULLY AS POSSIBLE.  This is because like I mentioned, Lucy’s body has suffered a lot of damage. Her spine could and should be fucked up after that fall.  And the reason every EMT or anyone who has the basic knowledge of first aid will tell you not to fucking move if you’ve suffered a traumatic fall, is because if you move and your spine WASN’T fucked up by that fall, it very easily WILL get fucked up if you try to move the body while it’s still injured! They are very careful about that shit, because if you slip up you turn a situation from salvageable, to fucking vegetable in one solid motion!  All it takes is just curving your spine a bit immediately after it’s suffered from the shock an-

Oh yeah kinda like that. That might do it or-

Oof, yeah arching your back like that and trying to crawl after a fall.  Yeah that ought to do it.  Add on top of this, the aforementioned likelihood she broke a rib, and is probably suffering from a pierced lung and oh yeah

And if you’re not double-dead, you are at the very least fucking paralyzed, or require some serious physical therapy.  You are not walking away from this.

What was that?

“UP here”?  

I-is this not the ground floor?  Is there a lower part to this?  DID LUCY FALL ONTO ANOTHER LEDGE?  QUICK LUCY! YOU CAN JUST ROLL OVER; YOU DIDN’T HIT THE ACTUAL GROUND APPARENTLY! THERE’S MORE FALLING YOU CAN DO TO FINISH THE JOB!  

Wh-what?  I-it’s a cut?  It’s just a cut?  What the…How…What is this scene?!  You mean to tell me the only injury she got was some abdominal cut?!  From falling off a building?  What?  Did she just see the first 2-story building she came across and say “oh that looks good enough, yeah that should do it!”  I swear to god.  It’s almost like…

It’s almost like…

She didn’t want to die. Maybe she was just doing it for att-

NO! NO! DON’T YOU DARE! THAT’S NOT TRUE!  YOU TAKE THAT SHIT BACK!  THAT’S NOT A POSSIBILITY! LUCY DID NOT DO THAT!  SHE IS BETTER THAN THAT!  SHE DOES NOT DESERVE THAT!  AND I REFUSE TO BELIEVE THAT’S THE CASE!

So a girl jumps off a building to try and kill herself.  But the height she falls from is so low that the only damage she got was from some random ass cut that she no doubt wasn’t expecting.  Despite the assumed physical trauma that would’ve come if she jumped from a height any person would assume to be lethal enough; she doesn’t have any physical impairments, no lasting damage that we can see 9 months after the fact, no scar, no limp, she doesn’t even seem to be taking it very seriously in the current time.  How else would you explain that, except that she didn’t put much thought into it.  The kind of thought people who attempt suicide would, in planning out their attempt, climbing those stairs, knowing the area, and finally committing to it.  Despite all that contemplating, she didn’t go high enough to do anything more than get a freak accidental injury.  How is that not a sign that maybe she wasn’t really trying to die.  

But hey, I don’t read this junk.  I’m just going off what I see here.  I don’t know this character. Do you think that would be out of character for her at this point?  What other reason would you have for someone surviving this, but not dying?

….

Maybe they have a lower force of gravity in this world?

Hmm…

Or maybe Taeshi’s just a fucking hack who decided to go over the top and add a stupid gore effect that was far too much; instead of keeping the scene simple, subtle, and letting the action speak for itself, with a realistic tone and visual to keep things grounded (no pun intended).  

Atta’ girl!  I knew you had it in you!  

But it’s such a shame. Looking at this script, I’m already close to eclipsing the rant I made for the first part of this chapter and it was all for this one fucking moment.  And you can call me harsh all you want, but this seriously pissed me off.  I remember when this page came out, I was fuming.  I broke my vow of illiteracy to check the previous pages just because I had to know what the fuck lead to this, and what the fuck was happening.  This one panel haunts me and is one of the few moments in BCB that legitimately triggers me, because of how poorly handled it was.  

This should’ve been a fucking bombshell moment.  This should’ve been the moment that shut my cynical, hardass mouth up or glue my jaw straight to the floor.  It should’ve been an awe inspiring moment where Taeshi really showed us and reminded us just how fucking great she can be.  This was a moment that everyone was waiting for with bated breath.  I remember, I created January years ago specifically because we didn’t get this sort of scene.  We didn’t get to see Lucy’s last struggle, or giving in.  We were just told that she was gone and faded away, leaving us hollow and wanting for more.  Yearning for years and years for resolution to come.  

And this is what we got.

FUCKING YAMCHA’D!  

But y’know what’s the best part?  And if you know me, and are familiar with my stuff you know damn well what I’m talking about.  The absolute best part about this whole fucking thing?  

I beat Taeshi to the punch by miles.  And not only that, but (and this is what really pisses me off) reading this page showed me that I gave more fucking respect and thought into this character and this moment than Taeshi did.  Because, y’know why?  Because of this.

That’s right.  Lucy was supposed to cry out and deny and fight Sue in January to let her die. Kind of like…

HRMMMMMMMMMM Now don’t get it twisted.  I’m not trying to make a comparison in saying that my idea of having Lucy fight with Susan to let her die is the same thing happening here.  What I’m talking about here, is this wonderful thing in storytelling called TONE.  And this scene, starting with that panel and Lucy’s reaction to Augustus kills what should’ve been a serious, and somber tone by adding in this layer of mystery, and doubt, and mistrust, and fear.  Which COULD’VE been interesting and done well to make us invested.  

Like oh no, what’s he doing? Who is he calling?

Oh my god, is he calling Alejandro?  Is this how Lucy dies? (although, I doubt there would be much he could do since she’s already dying.  Putting Alejandro in that mix would’ve just been weird, what’s he gonna do?  Beat up her corpse or something?)

Oh what a relief!  He’s calling an ambulance how nice, this is so relieving except wait-

WE ALREADY KNOW THAT AUGUSTUS IS GOING TO SAVE HER!  SO ALL THAT BULLSHIT TENSION IS POINTLESS!  So what did we learn or get from this scene?

We see how Lucy tried to kill herself.  Which was poorly done.  

We see how she was conflicted after Curtain Call with Mike talking to her about stuff.  

We see that her moving to some other place and getting transferred to a new school wasn’t just something that happened in response to her suicide attempt but was pre-planned.  

Okay.  

Let me go make a call and see if any of this gets brought up or used later on.

Dude I’m being serious here. Why do you keep laughing?  I just want to know if anything comes from the information from this scene.  Otherwise, what’s the fucking point of dropping this bomb here other than because Lucy’s here now so we must have this scene now.  

STOP LAUGHING!  

But what am I saying? We haven’t even talked about January yet!  So let’s do that shall we?  Cause I know you think I’m just tooting my own horn by saying I put more thought into January’s suicide attempt scene but allow me to indulge myself.  As I dive into one of the best scenes I’ve ever written.  A scene that I put all my heart and mind into, to make it the best it could be.  Because this character deserves it.

Right off the bat it is meant to make the reader perk up and raise a red flag to note that something is going on and you need to take notice.  If you’ve read January, you’ll know that it is a very wordy comic.  It’s jampacked with panels, words, jokes, dramatic moments, and it is meant to be a very fast paced comic that rarely slows down or shuts up.  So when greeted by six panel pages that are wordless, and seemingly benign it is meant to illicit intrigue into the reader, to make them wonder why has the train slowed down.

It doesn’t waste your time either, as only two pages later do we get words again but it only adds more mystery into what’s going on.  The paneling is still broken up, and scarce.  And as the reader follows along, the tension and mystery builds.  The lack of panels, the more prevalent backgrounds, it is visually demanding the reader slow down and immerse themselves into this scene and what is going on.  Sue acting as the surrogate for the reader, as she gains the information and is left questioning in tandem with the reader.  

And just as it dawns on the reader what’s going on, it dawns on Susan.  The tension builds, and the question shifts.  No longer asking what’s going on with this scene, but rather:  How can Sue stop this?  Or Can she stop this?  

And at the same time, we are being drip fed Lucy’s words and perspective.  We know what’s about to happen, it’s no longer a mystery.  And the tension mounts until the final moment…

This is why I give props to the canon for its portrayal of Lucy’s jump.  It was well done, well paced.  It had this nice tension, and for that I appreciate it.  But where it differs is what happens after Lucy commits to killing herself.

You see, there was a lot of thought I had put into how exactly Lucy was going to kill herself. If you’ll allow me to be cold and dark for a moment; I went over a few different modes of suicide for Lucy.  And really thinking about which one would be the best one, not just for dramatic effect, not just for realism, but also which would be the best one for this scene.  It came down to what would be a method that Lucy could survive from if she attempted it (so no toaster bath); what would be a method that Susan could dramatically save Lucy from, while still being able to talk to Lucy and understand her (so no over the counter cocktail); and how can I make it absolutely 100% sure to the audience that both of these characters are committed to what they’re doing? And to me…

Nothing shows that more, than Lucy fully committed to kicking the chair out from under her; and Sue clinging to Lucy for dear life, physically and emotionally trying to prop her up even as Lucy has fully committed to giving up.  (if you’ve ever wondered how this overthinking, overanalyzing, cynical mind of mine works towards building my own stories.  This should give you a good idea of what I go over with these scenes when I take them seriously)

If you remember the comment I mentioned earlier about changing Lucy’s reaction to Sue’s rescue, this is what I changed, and how it elevates this scene.  Narratively, this should’ve been the moment where the reader catches a breath and relaxes knowing that Lucy’s safe now.  But instead the reader remains in Sue’s shoes, clinging to Lucy and wanting to tell her everything’s okay, but Lucy explains that it’s not.  We see into Lucy’s mentality.  And it heartbreaking, because it’s not yelled at, it’s not cried out, it’s spoken somberly, with expressions and responses that fully capture how hopeless Lucy feels, and how true she feels it is.

And when Lucy finally does yell, and shows emotion it isn’t done to add some extra tension or drama in actuality, this is a moment where Sue breaks through Lucy’s armor and she shows her vulnerability.  And even still the tone does not change.  The tension is still tight, and it refuses to let up.  But not only that.

This scene comes with a flashback, but instead of leaving us with more questions, or scratching our heads as to what it had to do with anything or what it means.  It adds context to the situation, and its message is meant to be absolutely clear to you why it’s happening and what it means for the story and for these characters.  This is Lucy’s moment.  This is where we see her at her lowest point.  Broken. Defeated.  Unable to cope or push on.  

But we’re reminded that there are two characters in this scene.  We see both sides of the coin fully understand what Sue is feeling right now. Guilty.  Ashamed. Stupid. Naïve.  This scene builds, exposes, and fleshes out its two main characters.  Showing each of their struggles.

It’s this scene that sets the stage for these characters, and it’s a jumping off point (again, no pun intended) for them to grow from.  This entire scene sets its serious tone from the start, and holds the reader hostage, keeping the tension up and forcing them to take this seriously because it has something to say.  

(god damn it, I really should’ve rephrased that to “cause I am not letting you go” that would’ve been so much better) But that’s its final message, and final note.  A promise that carries on, that is reflected in the characters every action from this point on.  Lucy’s suicide attempt is what kicks off(…no pun intended?) the rest of the story. It lingers over everything and is a main point that is brought back constantly, time and time again.  It is an integral part of not only Lucy’s character development, but Sue’s character development.  

And even when she does come down, and the reader is given a moment to take a breath and crack a joke. It’s clear that this is just the beginning, and there is a lot of work left to be done.  And things for the reader to look forward to.  Lucy’s suicide attempt was something that I knew I had to treat with the utmost respect, and love.  In the end, we don’t know what’s going to happen now, but we do know Lucy’s problem.  We completely understand and can empathize with her character, for what she’s feeling, what she’s going through right now.  

Nothing is left unclear.

You’re never asking what’s going on.

You’re not meant to search and assume the answers on your own.

It’s clear cut.

It’s gutwrenching.

It’s brutal.

But most importantly.

It’s fucking real.

You don’t doubt that Susan, with adrenaline pumping through her veins could force herself to hold Lucy up.  You don’t wonder how Lucy could survive her attempt.  You don’t wonder what is going through her mind.  Or why she’s being saved.  The scene is meant to be impactful (Jesus I just keep walking right into it.  God damn! I’m sorry, no pun intended) It deserves so much better than what it got. After everything that this comic did…This.

This just kills it for me. You had the opportunity to make this amazing, something more than just its premise.  But instead it just falls flat on its fa-OH GOD DAMN IT WHY CAN’T I STOP DOING THAT?!  I JUST CAN’T AVOID ACCIDENTALLY MAKING THESE DAMN PUNS!  

A friend of mine made a good point on how this chapter could’ve been salvaged.   First off fuck that blood splatter it’s gratuitous, it’s excessive, and it’s distracting.  Just imagine for a second that it wasn’t there.

(look I tried to clean it up, it’s getting really late and this is getting absurdly long) But imagine instead Lucy fell and we just see her lying on the ground.  Her mind is in shock.  She is struggling to move.  Her body feels almost numb.  She doesn’t know what’s going on, her mind hasn’t fully comprehended what has just happened.  We start to see blood slowly pool beneath her and blend into the snow.  Growing as she starts to feel the pain set in.  The chilly breeze cooling her wound and making her feel unbearably cold.  Her vision fades, the scene zooms out as she starts to accept her fate, maybe thinking of final apologies, lamenting on the things she’s done, the words she’s never said, the life she never lead.  And just as she’s about to pass out.

She sees a silhouette of Augustus.  It’s unclear what he does, why he’s there, or what happens to Lucy as she passes out unsure if it was even real, what will happen to her.

And THEN the chapter starts! And we see her, and the suicide attempt can stand on its own! (maybe you can insert Augustus’ point of view of the scene in the place of this scene when Lucy says “this is the boy who saved my life” and we can maybe see Augustus care a bit about Lucy, or how he really feels.   It also would’ve been better if this scene came out earlier in the comic when this was more fresh in our minds.  But let’s wrap it up shall we?

We get a nice few bits of Augustus interacting with Lucy’s family and it’s really heartwarming.  It’s so cute, and it is a wonderful reminder of how Lucy’s actions impact not only our main characters but their families.  Not to mention Augustus is just adorable, and seeing him interact in this new environment, with people who legitimately care for him is very refreshing.  I like it a lot.  

And come on, just look at how cute and amazing Lucy’s mom is.  She’s the best thing about this chapter.  It’s really nice to see Lucy’s family and how they act.  

and the chapter ends with cute Augustus finally finding a place to call home~

Overall, this comic is just a bunch of disappointments with one nice little light at the end.  There were many chapters I’d point to as infuriating but this one…

For what it set out to do, and what it tried to do, and what it should’ve done.  In a word it is utterly disappointing.  And leaves me so hollow.  

I give it a 2/10.  I hope to god that Taeshi does better.  I’d say it can’t get worse than this, but I keep hearing about this carnival chapter, and man…

I’ll see you guys when i miss the next update.  Till then, this is Lt_Amazil signing off.

[reverseskydives]

How Not to Waste Time Generating Leads on LinkedIn

Lead generation is an indispensable part of business.

If you want to have paying customers, you need to gather a reliable stream of leads.

That’s the bottom line.

But generating leads isn’t as easy as one might think. In fact, it requires quite a bit of finesse and a whole lot of time.

Reports show that 65% of businesses say generating traffic and leads is their top marketing challenge.

That doesn’t surprise me at all.

There is encouraging news though.

Marketers now have a lot more avenues to target potential customers. At the forefront of that is social media.

And if we’re talking about the highest-quality leads, LinkedIn is the clear winner.

It’s a bit shocking, I know.

You expect a giant like Facebook to be leading the pack.

Not in this case. More than 80% of B2B leads sourced from social media come from LinkedIn.

That goes to show the power of this platform.

Here’s the kicker though: many people are failing at using LinkedIn for lead generation.

They’re spending too much time in the process. And they do not see a return on that time investment.

That’s a frustrating problem to have, and I’ll show you how to fix it.

Here’s how you can generate leads on LinkedIn without wasting your time.

1. Target the decision makers

It’s imperative you consider the sales cycle when you’re generating leads.

I am referring to the entire process it takes for you to sell a product or a service.

It includes everything, i.e., generating a lead, nurturing that lead, and eventually making the sale.

Here’s a map of what a typical sales cycle can look like:

Some of us have the good fortune of being in a niche where it can take as little as a few minutes to close a sale.

For others, it can take months and even years.

Whatever camp you fall in, there is a simple solution to shorten the sales cycle.

Find the decision maker.

Here’s what I mean.

Unless you’re targeting a solopreneur, most businesses have select people who ultimately make the purchasing decisions.

Wouldn’t it be wise to direct your efforts at someone with authority to close the deal?

Of course, it would!

Now, the decision maker is not always the CEO. In fact, it’s rarely the case for most businesses.

I’m not saying you shouldn’t target CEOs.

It depends on what you’re selling, what business needs it will serve, and what your goals are.

Let’s say you’re a freelance writer looking for new clients.

The best people to target when prospecting would be marketing managers or someone in that field.

Anyone else would likely be a waste of your time.

The decision makers usually have the following positions:

HR director

Marketing director

Sales director

These are mainly for B2B leads, but the premise doesn’t change when you’re targeting individual consumers.

There’s usually (not always) someone they have to consult with before making a purchasing decision.

Tailor your efforts and your messaging to take that fact into account.

2. Follow up with old leads before targeting new ones

I’m sure you’ve heard that lead generation is a numbers game.

Target enough people, and eventually you’ll land a sale.

That’s true in a sense.

But the quality of these leads is also important.

Many people collect a bunch of leads, initiate contact, and stop there.

Then, they restart the process.

The problem with that?

There’s no follow-up.

And if you know a thing or two about lead generation, you know the follow-up is crucial.

We know 80% of sales need five follow-ups, but almost 50% of people only send one.

Wires get crossed. Your message could be missed. Your prospect could get distracted.

Especially on a social media platform, it’s common for your message to get buried beneath all the noise.

If you don’t send a follow-up message, you miss out on a potential customer.

You also waste time and effort it took to generate those leads.

When is the right time to send a subsequent message?

In my experience, three days is ideal for the first follow-up. You should check in with your prospects several times.

It can even be automated.

If you’ve collected email addresses, you can set up an autoresponder series.

This way, it becomes a hands-off process.

Businesses who use marketing automation experience a 451% increase in qualified leads.

3. Put lead generation on autopilot with content marketing

One of the most powerful features on LinkedIn is its publishing platform.

You can publish content natively on LinkedIn Pulse, or you can republish posts from your business blog.

Either way, it’s one of the smartest strategies for generating leads.

For one, it allows you to demonstrate your expertise to potential customers.

There’s no better way to convert a customer than to show them how knowledgeable you are in your field.

It can also shorten the sales cycle.

Think about it.

If you’re consistently educating prospects and solving their problems with your free content, they’ll be easier to convert.

Doesn’t content marketing take time though?

It does, but here’s the thing.

You won’t find another audience as receptive as the network on LinkedIn.

The platform is filled with professionals waiting for you to educate them.

They are ready and willing to do business.

If you publish helpful content, your job is half done. You’ll be on your way to generating the kind of leads that turn into lifelong customers.

You can also repurpose content you’ve already published on your blog.

I’ve done this before, and it works exceptionally well.

Here’s some crucial advice for publishing content on LinkedIn:

always leave a call to action and a link at the end of each article

publish actionable content readers can implement to experience a quick win

only create content that will serve your ideal prospect

promote your LinkedIn articles on other platforms

publish evergreen articles

4. Stop harvesting cold leads

This one takes the prize for time-wasters.

Here’s what many people’s idea of lead generation looks like:

obtain a list of email addresses of people who may or may not be their ideal prospects

send out emails or messages en masse

There are many things wrong with this approach.

The biggest is these people have not demonstrated an interest or a need for what you’re selling.

Your leads are not targeted enough, and they’re not qualified.

It means the chances of these leads converting to solid sales are slim.

The solution?

It’s a multi-step approach.

Step #1: Establish what you want your prospects to do

The first thing you need is a goal.

You’re generating leads, but what’s the purpose? What’s the next step?

You may want your prospects to download a free resource, schedule a free consultation, attend a webinar, hop on a call, or something of that sort.

Decide what your goal is before even starting the lead generation process.

Step #2: Create a hit list of hyper-targeted prospects

What’s the typical process for finding leads on LinkedIn?

You type in a job title in the search bar, hit enter, and get a plethora of results.

These become your targets, right?

That doesn’t work. You need to conduct a more focused search.

Here’s how.

First, click on the search bar and scroll to the bottom, where it says “search for people with filters.”

This will allow you to filter your results so you can focus on a targeted group of leads.

Your number of leads will be smaller, but their quality will be greater.

Here are some of the filters available:

Step #3: Initiate contact

After you’ve put your hit list together, you can connect and send a personal message.

When you hit “connect,” some of the options will prompt you to enter an email address.

If you connect as a “friend,” this isn’t necessary, so select that option.

Also, ensure your connection request has a message attached to it.

You only have 300 characters, but that’s more than enough to send a thoughtful message.

Don’t send the same generic message to every prospect.

You can still have a template to save time, but personalize it. I recommend going through the prospect’s profile so you have more information to go on.

Step #4: Build a relationship

It’s critical you continue to engage with your LinkedIn connections.

This could be by engaging with their content and sending them messages. That’s what’s going to set the stage for a sales conversion later on.

It’s only after you’ve gotten on your prospects radars that you can start thinking about selling to them.

Step #5: Funnel prospects to the top of your sales funnel outside of LinkedIn

LinkedIn should not be used to sell.

It’s a great prospecting tool. But you’ll sabotage your lead generation if you sell prematurely.

Use it to get prospects interested enough to join your permission marketing funnel. You can then take the sales process outside of the platform.

I know this sounds like a tedious and long road.

I promise you, this is way more effective than targeting a large list of unqualified leads.

You will get nowhere fast.

5. Go premium

If you’re serious about using LinkedIn as your primary lead-generation tool, a premium account can serve you well.

It can increase your efficiency and save you time.

You’ve got several options, depending on your goal.

You’ll benefit from the features such as InMail, advanced search, and access to information about people who viewed your profile.

Sure, the free account allows you to filter your searches. But with a premium account, you can conduct even more advanced searches.

With InMail, you can message people not in your network.

You can also look at all the people who’ve viewed your profile. This is a great way of gathering warm leads.

These profile views represent people who have showed some interest in you.

There are other features, but these three are particularly useful.

Now, I’m not saying this is a must.

It’s not a necessity to have a premium account to succeed with lead generation.

In fact, before you invest in a premium LinkedIn account, you should test the platform.

If you see promising results, and you want to amplify your lead-generation efforts, premium is a solid path to take.

6. Join groups where your ideal prospects hang out

LinkedIn groups are gold.

There’s no better way to quickly and easily find quality prospects.

You can also create your own group. But that requires a time investment—you need to build the group and then maintain it.

If you want to save time, I recommend joining an existing group.

You want to select groups relevant to your industry. It’s also important to have an idea of your ideal prospect.

This way, you can target people who will be receptive to your message and, eventually, your product.

Here are some other things you should consider:

group size – you want to target groups with a decent number of people so you have a large enough prospect pool

level of engagement – group members should be active: interacting with content, starting conversations, etc.

group rules – most groups have rules of engagement; some are stricter than others and don’t tolerate any promotional content.

How do you find these groups?

Conduct a group search.

Type in your keyword in the search bar, and select “Groups.”

You can also click on the “Work” tab in your top menu and click on “Groups.”

Then, click on “Discover.”

LinkedIn will display a list of groups:

By default, they’re filtered according to your industry.

Since my field is marketing, I automatically get shown a bunch of groups relevant to that field (no search necessary).

Click on the individual groups that interest you.

Read the “about this group” section to get familiar with them and their rules.

Check out the admins and the mutual connections you share with the group. If it seems it fits with your goals, go ahead and connect.

Conclusion

LinkedIn is hands down one of the best platforms for lead generation.

If you know how to work it, you can end up with some quality prospects primed to become your paying customers.

But as fruitful as lead generation can be, it is also a time-consuming task.

If you don’t use the right strategies to target the right people, it is easy to spend months and see no result.

I’ve pinpointed some of the biggest time-wasters and ways you can go through this lead-generation process quickly.

Use the strategies, and you’ll see more leads of a higher quality, without a massive time investment.

What are your best tips for generating qualified leads on LinkedIn?

from Social Media Marketing http://ift.tt/2yCE0ll via Social Media Marketing

[filipeteimuraz]

How Not to Waste Time Generating Leads on LinkedIn

Lead generation is an indispensable part of business.

If you want to have paying customers, you need to gather a reliable stream of leads.

That’s the bottom line.

But generating leads isn’t as easy as one might think. In fact, it requires quite a bit of finesse and a whole lot of time.

Reports show that 65% of businesses say generating traffic and leads is their top marketing challenge.

That doesn’t surprise me at all.

There is encouraging news though.

Marketers now have a lot more avenues to target potential customers. At the forefront of that is social media.

And if we’re talking about the highest-quality leads, LinkedIn is the clear winner.

It’s a bit shocking, I know.

You expect a giant like Facebook to be leading the pack.

Not in this case. More than 80% of B2B leads sourced from social media come from LinkedIn.

That goes to show the power of this platform.

Here’s the kicker though: many people are failing at using LinkedIn for lead generation.

They’re spending too much time in the process. And they do not see a return on that time investment.

That’s a frustrating problem to have, and I’ll show you how to fix it.

Here’s how you can generate leads on LinkedIn without wasting your time.

1. Target the decision makers

It’s imperative you consider the sales cycle when you’re generating leads.

I am referring to the entire process it takes for you to sell a product or a service.

It includes everything, i.e., generating a lead, nurturing that lead, and eventually making the sale.

Here’s a map of what a typical sales cycle can look like:

Some of us have the good fortune of being in a niche where it can take as little as a few minutes to close a sale.

For others, it can take months and even years.

Whatever camp you fall in, there is a simple solution to shorten the sales cycle.

Find the decision maker.

Here’s what I mean.

Unless you’re targeting a solopreneur, most businesses have select people who ultimately make the purchasing decisions.

Wouldn’t it be wise to direct your efforts at someone with authority to close the deal?

Of course, it would!

Now, the decision maker is not always the CEO. In fact, it’s rarely the case for most businesses.

I’m not saying you shouldn’t target CEOs.

It depends on what you’re selling, what business needs it will serve, and what your goals are.

Let’s say you’re a freelance writer looking for new clients.

The best people to target when prospecting would be marketing managers or someone in that field.

Anyone else would likely be a waste of your time.

The decision makers usually have the following positions:

HR director

Marketing director

Sales director

These are mainly for B2B leads, but the premise doesn’t change when you’re targeting individual consumers.

There’s usually (not always) someone they have to consult with before making a purchasing decision.

Tailor your efforts and your messaging to take that fact into account.

2. Follow up with old leads before targeting new ones

I’m sure you’ve heard that lead generation is a numbers game.

Target enough people, and eventually you’ll land a sale.

That’s true in a sense.

But the quality of these leads is also important.

Many people collect a bunch of leads, initiate contact, and stop there.

Then, they restart the process.

The problem with that?

There’s no follow-up.

And if you know a thing or two about lead generation, you know the follow-up is crucial.

We know 80% of sales need five follow-ups, but almost 50% of people only send one.

Wires get crossed. Your message could be missed. Your prospect could get distracted.

Especially on a social media platform, it’s common for your message to get buried beneath all the noise.

If you don’t send a follow-up message, you miss out on a potential customer.

You also waste time and effort it took to generate those leads.

When is the right time to send a subsequent message?

In my experience, three days is ideal for the first follow-up. You should check in with your prospects several times.

It can even be automated.

If you’ve collected email addresses, you can set up an autoresponder series.

This way, it becomes a hands-off process.

Businesses who use marketing automation experience a 451% increase in qualified leads.

3. Put lead generation on autopilot with content marketing

One of the most powerful features on LinkedIn is its publishing platform.

You can publish content natively on LinkedIn Pulse, or you can republish posts from your business blog.

Either way, it’s one of the smartest strategies for generating leads.

For one, it allows you to demonstrate your expertise to potential customers.

There’s no better way to convert a customer than to show them how knowledgeable you are in your field.

It can also shorten the sales cycle.

Think about it.

If you’re consistently educating prospects and solving their problems with your free content, they’ll be easier to convert.

Doesn’t content marketing take time though?

It does, but here’s the thing.

You won’t find another audience as receptive as the network on LinkedIn.

The platform is filled with professionals waiting for you to educate them.

They are ready and willing to do business.

If you publish helpful content, your job is half done. You’ll be on your way to generating the kind of leads that turn into lifelong customers.

You can also repurpose content you’ve already published on your blog.

I’ve done this before, and it works exceptionally well.

Here’s some crucial advice for publishing content on LinkedIn:

always leave a call to action and a link at the end of each article

publish actionable content readers can implement to experience a quick win

only create content that will serve your ideal prospect

promote your LinkedIn articles on other platforms

publish evergreen articles

4. Stop harvesting cold leads

This one takes the prize for time-wasters.

Here’s what many people’s idea of lead generation looks like:

obtain a list of email addresses of people who may or may not be their ideal prospects

send out emails or messages en masse

There are many things wrong with this approach.

The biggest is these people have not demonstrated an interest or a need for what you’re selling.

Your leads are not targeted enough, and they’re not qualified.

It means the chances of these leads converting to solid sales are slim.

The solution?

It’s a multi-step approach.

Step #1: Establish what you want your prospects to do

The first thing you need is a goal.

You’re generating leads, but what’s the purpose? What’s the next step?

You may want your prospects to download a free resource, schedule a free consultation, attend a webinar, hop on a call, or something of that sort.

Decide what your goal is before even starting the lead generation process.

Step #2: Create a hit list of hyper-targeted prospects

What’s the typical process for finding leads on LinkedIn?

You type in a job title in the search bar, hit enter, and get a plethora of results.

These become your targets, right?

That doesn’t work. You need to conduct a more focused search.

Here’s how.

First, click on the search bar and scroll to the bottom, where it says “search for people with filters.”

This will allow you to filter your results so you can focus on a targeted group of leads.

Your number of leads will be smaller, but their quality will be greater.

Here are some of the filters available:

Step #3: Initiate contact

After you’ve put your hit list together, you can connect and send a personal message.

When you hit “connect,” some of the options will prompt you to enter an email address.

If you connect as a “friend,” this isn’t necessary, so select that option.

Also, ensure your connection request has a message attached to it.

You only have 300 characters, but that’s more than enough to send a thoughtful message.

Don’t send the same generic message to every prospect.

You can still have a template to save time, but personalize it. I recommend going through the prospect’s profile so you have more information to go on.

Step #4: Build a relationship

It’s critical you continue to engage with your LinkedIn connections.

This could be by engaging with their content and sending them messages. That’s what’s going to set the stage for a sales conversion later on.

It’s only after you’ve gotten on your prospects radars that you can start thinking about selling to them.

Step #5: Funnel prospects to the top of your sales funnel outside of LinkedIn

LinkedIn should not be used to sell.

It’s a great prospecting tool. But you’ll sabotage your lead generation if you sell prematurely.

Use it to get prospects interested enough to join your permission marketing funnel. You can then take the sales process outside of the platform.

I know this sounds like a tedious and long road.

I promise you, this is way more effective than targeting a large list of unqualified leads.

You will get nowhere fast.

5. Go premium

If you’re serious about using LinkedIn as your primary lead-generation tool, a premium account can serve you well.

It can increase your efficiency and save you time.

You’ve got several options, depending on your goal.

You’ll benefit from the features such as InMail, advanced search, and access to information about people who viewed your profile.

Sure, the free account allows you to filter your searches. But with a premium account, you can conduct even more advanced searches.

With InMail, you can message people not in your network.

You can also look at all the people who’ve viewed your profile. This is a great way of gathering warm leads.

These profile views represent people who have showed some interest in you.

There are other features, but these three are particularly useful.

Now, I’m not saying this is a must.

It’s not a necessity to have a premium account to succeed with lead generation.

In fact, before you invest in a premium LinkedIn account, you should test the platform.

If you see promising results, and you want to amplify your lead-generation efforts, premium is a solid path to take.

6. Join groups where your ideal prospects hang out

LinkedIn groups are gold.

There’s no better way to quickly and easily find quality prospects.

You can also create your own group. But that requires a time investment—you need to build the group and then maintain it.

If you want to save time, I recommend joining an existing group.

You want to select groups relevant to your industry. It’s also important to have an idea of your ideal prospect.

This way, you can target people who will be receptive to your message and, eventually, your product.

Here are some other things you should consider:

group size – you want to target groups with a decent number of people so you have a large enough prospect pool

level of engagement – group members should be active: interacting with content, starting conversations, etc.

group rules – most groups have rules of engagement; some are stricter than others and don’t tolerate any promotional content.

How do you find these groups?

Conduct a group search.

Type in your keyword in the search bar, and select “Groups.”

You can also click on the “Work” tab in your top menu and click on “Groups.”

Then, click on “Discover.”

LinkedIn will display a list of groups:

By default, they’re filtered according to your industry.

Since my field is marketing, I automatically get shown a bunch of groups relevant to that field (no search necessary).

Click on the individual groups that interest you.

Read the “about this group” section to get familiar with them and their rules.

Check out the admins and the mutual connections you share with the group. If it seems it fits with your goals, go ahead and connect.

Conclusion

LinkedIn is hands down one of the best platforms for lead generation.

If you know how to work it, you can end up with some quality prospects primed to become your paying customers.

But as fruitful as lead generation can be, it is also a time-consuming task.

If you don’t use the right strategies to target the right people, it is easy to spend months and see no result.

I’ve pinpointed some of the biggest time-wasters and ways you can go through this lead-generation process quickly.

Use the strategies, and you’ll see more leads of a higher quality, without a massive time investment.

What are your best tips for generating qualified leads on LinkedIn?

https://www.quicksprout.com/2017/09/25/how-not-to-waste-time-generating-leads-on-linkedin/ Read more here - http://review-and-bonuss.blogspot.com/2017/09/how-not-to-waste-time-generating-leads.html

[pcinvasion-blog]

New Post has been published on PC Invasion

New Post has been published on https://www.pcinvasion.com/ghost-recon-wildlands-pc-technical-review

Ghost Recon: Wildlands PC Technical Review

Bolivia has a spooky problem; it’s haunted by ghosts. Not the fun kind of ghosts who’ll leave weird footprints in your living room or stack all the chairs in the kitchen into avant-garde shapes. No, these ghosts are backed by shady US finances and all come with automatic weapons. Tom Clancy’s Ghost Presents … Ghost Recon: Wildlands is released worldwide on 7 March, and it has PC options galore to explore.

So many options and menus in fact that I think, in a slight break from the traditional PC Invasion order of Technical Review events, I’ll just go through them sequentially. You’re in for a whole world of menu screenshots, dear reader. Plus some commentary on what some of the options actually mean, and comments on my experiences with how the game performs.

Here’s the PC I’ve been using to take a look at this title: i5-6600 / 16GB RAM / 4GB 380X (at the time of writing I was using the latest 17.2.1 drivers, 17.3.1 have since come out). Not the top end testing ultra-machines you might see on other sites, but representative of, well, the PC I currently own. If you’re curious about mid-range Ghost Recon: Wildlands performance, you’re in the right place.

You’re also in the right place for Grey Wolf stickers.

To save some time for those who played the closed (or open) beta, options and performance appear to be largely identical. There are a few small differences and additions in the full release (I could never get the benchmark working properly in the beta, for one thing), but based on my experience with both versions you can be pretty sure of getting the same sort of frame-rates as the betas. That’ll be good or bad news, depending upon how you found performance there.

For those who aren’t familiar with the PC graphics (and more) options in the game, join me now for an extensive visit to MenuTown. Starting without our old miscellaneous friend, Gameplay. You can click on any of these images to make them larger, if you wish.

Nothing too fancy here. You can toggle the aiming mode to over the shoulder if you wish, and do things like tell Ghost Recon: Wildlands to cool it with the tutorial messages. The matchmaking filter can be set to ‘Language and mic’ if you wish to stick to players who are both using a mic and potentially speaking your language (handy if you’re serious about this tactical co-op business). In-keeping with that, you can allow people you play with to recommend you to others here too.

Next in line, it’s Keyboard and Mouse control options.

Here’s where you can forlornly mess around with sensitivity settings in the hope of making the helicopters control in slightly more coherent manner. Bad luck, they’re coded that way. Same goes for the now infamously robust vehicles, which can defy almost all laws of physics short of driving vertically up a cliff face.

Vehicular ‘feel’ is certainly strange in this game, but the fact that the control options provide separate sensitivity sliders for driving, drones, choppers, and aircraft (along with separate options to invert the Y axis and so on) shows a commendable flexibility. Same goes for the inclusion of a Left-Handed Mode option.

As well as the usual selection of Crouch and Run toggles, this is where you’ll find the Key Mapping section. Again, divided into separate branches. Want to change the button that launches your mobile scouting drone and absolutely nothing else? Go ahead. Want to extensively alter the entire control scheme to suit a very specific taste? I haven’t tested every possible button combination in the universe, but that sure seems possible.

Aside from things that are out of the control of incremental options (like weird car physics), the Ghost Recon: Wildlands keyboard and mouse controls seem like the optimal way to play. Aiming, obviously, is far superior with the mouse. But things like being able to order your squad around (or call in rebel support) via hotkeys are a boon too. You still have to have the radial menu open when you do this (in part because some of those keys are shared with switching weapons), but it’s still a helpful shortcut.

Switching between controller and keys/mouse on the fly is possible as well, so if you find that the ideal world is keyboard and mouse while on foot but gamepad for vehicles, you can take that approach. Button prompts switch on the fly as well (at least they did for my knock-off 360 pad).

The HUD toggles are similarly broad in scope, allowing you to pretty much turn off every aspect of the UI individually. Again, this allows the player a neat amount of flexibility in terms of what’s shown on screen. They’re all straightforward ‘on or off’ toggles. No ‘fade out over time’ options here, which is a slight shame.

Moving on to what many will feel is the main event, Video and Graphics options. Plus a smattering of Benchmarks.

General stuff first. Ghost Recon: Wildlands will support 4K resolution if your monitor will (or you can downsample if that seems like a wise move). 16:9 and 16:10 aspect ratios are supported, though I don’t know if areas get stretched or cut off with the latter. It’ll run in Fullscreen, Borderless Window or Windowed mode, as desired.

The frame-rate limit counter starts at 30, goes up in increments of ten up to 60, then offers 75, 90, 120, and 144. You have the option to leave it off completely too. Ubisoft really going the extra distance for customisation of the optional in-game frame cap, there.

Also of interest from a PC perspective (literally), is the Field of View slider. Here’s a comparison between the FOV at minimum and right up at 100%. Presently, I’ve settled closer to 50%, as the maximum was creating a bit of a fish-eyed effect when moving the camera around.

FOV at its lowest.

FOV to the max. Hey, I can almost see her legs now.

On then to the more in-depth graphics options. Many of which you will notice I have turned Off, either out of preference (motion blur, please die forever) or because Ghost Recon: Wildlands really makes my 380X earn its keep.

The presets are Low, Medium, High, Very High, and Ultra. A slightly tweaked ‘Medium’ is about all my GPU can cope with; at least without making the concession for better image quality at the cost of locking to 30fps. In what seems to be a trend for Ubisoft, each option provides an accompanying picture showing what effect, say, increasing the Level of Detail will have in a practical sense. Combined with the VRAM bar and the Benchmark tool, this is a pretty dependable way to figure out a decent quality-performance trade off.

Also useful if you want to know what the hell Nvidia’s special Turf Technology is all about. I suppose it’s fitting for a drugs game to have a special setting devoted to grass.

As mentioned at the start of the piece, the Benchmark tool utterly failed to function for me during the closed beta (giving averages of about 11fps even on all Low). Now, however, it works. So here’s what Ghost Recon: Wildlands manages on my machine at Low, Ultra (well, Ultra-ish, I had to turn down terrain quality a notch to get under the VRAM bar), and my slightly boosted Medium settings.

The ‘Low’ Preset.

The ‘Ultra’ Preset (mostly – Terrain detail turned down to get under the VRAM limit)

Effectively the ‘Medium’ preset with some AF and a few things like Motion Blur off.

As you can see, Wildlands will barely manage 60fps at the lowest possible settings on a 380X. Ultra is out of the question, but if you’re willing to go for 30fps and higher image quality then that’s a possibility on GPUs at the lower end of the game’s range. I’ve been happy enough with the 40-50 average afforded by Medium settings. While that’s not ideal, the game does seem consistent with that range (in other words, it’s not fluctuating all over the place from 20 to 60 or anything). That’s true of both the Benchmark and (for now, I’ve only seen the first area) the game itself.

Initial loading times are extremely long, however. That goes for both the Benchmark and the game. Especially so with the main game, which spends a few minutes loading up to what amounts to a friends lobby, and then a few more minutes getting you into the actual game. Quite tedious, but the major benefit here is an apparent lack of any loading beyond this first couple of blocks. This was also from an HDD in my case, so an SSD would undoubtedly help.

There’s quite a bit of texture pop-in too. Most gratuitously straight after loading up, but throughout play as well.

All of this is pretty consistent with the performance I saw in the beta version, so not a whole lot has changed on that front. While we’re at it, here are the Audio options.

I’ve scrolled down beneath the usual set of Voice, Music etc sliders. What you see here are largely Microphone options for co-op play; whether you want to have a permanently Open Mic, or disable voice chat completely, and so on.

PC Invasion will no doubt be recording some co-op once the game is fully released, so I’ll refrain from any conclusions about connectivity until Ghost Recon: Wildlands is at the mercy of launch day. I didn’t run into any major problems during the beta when messing about with fellow Soldier Specter Man Tim McDonald, but that’s not necessarily a true indicator of how the final version may (or may not) function with a full player-base.

Now to make my escape from this article.

Whatever else you want to say about Ubisoft PC versions these days, they’re exhaustive with their toggles, tweaks, and sliders. We’re a picky (‘discerning’, if you prefer) lot in PC land, so there will doubtless be factors affecting someone that I haven’t even considered, but pretty much all the customisation options that I consider important are here in some fashion. There’s full incremental control over the frame cap (which can also be removed entirely). An FOV slider should ease most troubles with the default third-person camera being too close up. Controls can be rebound. The HUD can be essentially eliminated if you desire. 4K is supported if you have the machine power for it.

Performance-wise, Ghost Recon: Wildlands clearly demands a much more powerful GPU than my usually dependable 380X for anything approaching 60fps (or above) at the High/Ultra end of the graphics spectrum. It is, though, pretty consistent about staying in the 40-50fps range at roughly Medium settings. That’s not ideal, but to me seems perfectly playable.

There are some things that can’t be fixed by PC customisation tweaks, like clunky animations and curious vehicle handling (the latter can be mitigated a little), and design choices like the command wheel mean the UI leans towards the console version. But it seems like the majority of desirable options are accounted for in this release.

Overall, it seems the purity of the Ubisoft Cartel’s PC releases is generally on the rise.