#ivy.doc

[bucksaiga]

Billy being naturally confrontational and combative about any and everything is so funny lol

He bursts into the room after Steve gets home like "what the fuck's your problem?" and Steve's sighing loudly like "c'mon babe, I had a long day, can we not fight—"

"No. you walked in and you didn't even give me a single kiss or a fucking hug. Where's my hug, Harrington?"

And Steve starts laughing "Oh my god you're such a baby, c'mere" and he hugs and kisses him.

"I'm not a fuckin baby." Billy would mumble into his shoulder. "I could kick your ass."

"Yeah, yeah. Okay, tough baby."

"Watch. After this hug, I'm gonna fuck you up."

Steve softly chuckles. "Okay."

"You know I can. I will. I'm gonna..."

"Mhm."

Then he just hums and melts into the hug. "You're warm."

And he gets babied for the rest of the night <3

[lavenderhandcream]

welcome denizens of sexyville what the fuck is up look BACK at it

[bucksaiga]

How I think Billy saves people's contact info in his phone

Steve: MINE

Robin: Lesbian Steve

Heather: My Lesbian Doppelgänger

Chrissy: Backflip Babe

Eddie: Weed

Max: Shitbird

Lucas: Other Shitbird

Dustin: Steve's Shitbird

Will: Bowl cut shitbird

Mike: not in his contacts

El doesn't have a phone but she has Discord on her iPad and they’re in a server for just the 2 of them with a channel for chat and one for photos of waffles

[bucksaiga]

Billy and Steve had been dating for a week. Sex happened more often than not, but cuddling never occurred.

Steve would stare at Billy’s back as he slept on his side, stiff as a board like a soldier in line. Was he comfortable? Did he ever get a good night's rest?

He decided tonight would be the night he’d try to cuddle with Billy.

He scooted a little closer, carefully draping his arm over Billy, unintentionally startling him awake.

He flinched, deeply inhaling as Steve’s arm made its way around him.

“It’s just me, babe.”

Billy’s body relaxed slightly, and he’d gone back to sleep in the same position.

Not wanting to disturb him more, Steve went to sleep a few inches away with his arm draped across Billy’s side, his hand ghosting his torso.

The next night was the same, but Steve really wanted to cuddle with Billy, so he tried again.

He scooted even closer, pressing up against Billy’s stiff back.

Billy began to relax his body, softly sighing and leaning more into Steve.

“I’ve never done this before.” Billy mumbled. “Feels nice.”

“It does feel nice, yeah.”

“Can I...turn over and sleep on you?” His voice was small and bashful, like he was asking for a hugely inconvenient favor.

“Of course.” Steve welcomed him, lovingly opening his arms.

Billy turned over and pressed his face into Steve’s warm chest, instantly falling asleep as Steve’s hand made its way through his hair, massaging his scalp.

This was all he wanted.

[bucksaiga]

I just had this really funny thought about Billy just being terrible at showing affection.

Billy and Steve are just sitting on the couch watching TV and Billy's firmly gripping Steve's thigh. Steve glances over at him, confused. "Uh...babe. You okay? The movie's not that scary."

"What're you talking about?" Billy would cut his eyes at him. "I'm not scared of this cheesy ass movie."

"It's just..." Steve chuckles. "You're gripping the shit outta my leg so I just assumed—"

"What, you don't like being held? You're my guy, right? So I'm holdin' you."

"For dear life! C'mon, gimme your hand." Steve holds out his hand.

Billy glares at Steve's welcoming hand, then reluctantly places his hand into Steves.

Steve intertwines their fingers and smiles. "See? That's better."

They hold hands for several minutes as they watch the movie, then Billy starts squeezing Steve's hand.

"Babe. Baby. Relax. We're not arm wrestling, okay? Loosen up a little."

Billy sighs and loosens his grip on Steve's hand.

"I don't wanna hold your hand anymore." He pulls away. "You're makin' me feel dumb."

"Aww, don't do that! It's kinda sweet, y'know. I feel like you don't ever wanna let me go."

Billy shrugs. "Whatever. I guess I don't. I'm really into you. Never felt like this before."

"Yeah, same here. Wanna try again?"

"How about..." Billy pauses, swallowing thickly before speaking again "you just...hold me or something? Show me how it's done, since you're an expert."

Steve pulls Billy into his arms without a second thought. He holds him softly and gently, but securely. Kissing his hair, rubbing his arm, giving him occasional little squeezes until the movie's over.

"So what do you wanna do now—" Steve glances down and Billy's fast asleep.

I guess I'm stuck like this.

Not that Steve would mind.

[bucksaiga]

Something's wrong with Billy.

Clearly wrong.

He's been holding something back for days, maybe even weeks. Who knows how long?

Steve can tell, though. Billy's cranky and standoffish by default, but he's been more distant than usual.

Billy had a big appetite for sex. With Steve's long hours, he could hardly keep up. They normally had sex every single night, but lately, all Billy wanted to do was cuddle in bed and fall asleep on Steve's chest. Which was fine, but they hadn't had any sex in nearly a month.

That was when Steve knew something was wrong. He wasn't sure how to bring it up. He did all he could to keep comforting Billy, loving him, caring for him each and everyday, but...still...Billy just wasn't himself, and it wasn’t getting any better.

"Baby." Steve softly muttered, caressing Billy's back. "Baby?"

"Hm?"

"We haven't uh...fooled around in awhile. Too tired lately?"

"You can have me anytime, Steve." Billy reached into Steve's shorts, and Steve moved his hand.

"What'd you do that for? I thought you wanted to—"

"I do—but I'm more interested in you and how you're doing."

"I'm fine. Just tired." Billy rested his head on Steve's chest.

"That all? It's just...you've changed. You used to have so much fun, and we had wild sex every night—"

"So is that it?” Billy questioned. “I'm boring you? Gonna find somebody else?"

"What?” Steve emphatically shook his head. “N-no! I could never replace you. I just...you're different, and it makes me worry. Makes me wonder if I'm doing something wrong."

Billy laughed. "Don't be stupid. You're fuckin' perfect."

"So what's wrong, then?"

"It's just...it's like you said. We were having so much fun when we first got together. We'd sneak around, we'd party, get drunk, and everyday was like a fucking movie with you."

"Yeah. We had a lot of fun over the past year." Steve chuckled. "So what's the matter? Is this not fun anymore?"

"No. It's not all fun like before. I'm used to getting a thrill all the time but...when things started to calm down, you weren't just looking for fun. You were loving me, taking care of me, letting me go to school while you work. You told me you believe in me."

"And I meant that! What’s the problem?"

"That is the problem! I've never had that before. I don't—I don't know what else to offer you."

"Offer me?"

"...I don't know how to be anything but a good time. I don't know how to be anything but the life of the party. I don't know how to give you...what you give me."

Steve sighed, his hand wandering into Billy's curls. "Do you remember 2 months ago when I got food poisoning from that shitty food at the diner?"

"Yeah, you were puking your guts out for 2 days."

"And you took care of me. Made me some soup your mom used to make, a-and you even cut some tortillas into little chips with a pizza cutter. It was the cutest thing I've ever seen in my life."

"So?"

"So? That's what I want, Billy. You're there when I need you. For more than sex, more than a party. I can count on you to always be there, without fail. I never have a single doubt about your love for me."

"Because I love you a lot. I love the shit outta you."

"And I love the shit outta you too. So don't worry about this anymore, alright? We're good. Whether there's a party, or we're just lying in bed."

Billy let out the biggest sigh, loosening his shoulders and releasing all of his burdens. "Still feel like…fooling around?" He asked, playfully mocking Steve’s words.

"You kidding? My dick's standing at attention as we speak. You're so hot when you talk to me about your feelings."

Billy laughed as he rolled on top of Steve. "You're so fucking stupid, y'know that? How'd I get so lucky?"

[bucksaiga]

Imagine Heather blocking the Karen and Billy interaction

She asks Karen impolitely to stop distracting the lifeguard while he's on duty, then waits for her to walk away.

Billy scoffs, chuckling a bit. "Jealous, Heather?"

"Please, you're hardly my type. But you haven't even lived in this town a whole year. Do you really wanna get caught up in a cheating scandal with Karen fuckin' wheeler?" She questions, popping her gum.

He cocks his head, shooting her that mischievous smirk of his. " I don't mind shaking this boring ass town up a little. If the woman wants to engage in some...extracurricular activities, who am I to say no?"

Heather answers him with a dramatic eye-roll. "Luckily I'm here to say no for you. Now keep your eye on the pool. Maybe we can go to Scoops later if you behave yourself."

"O—"

"Before you even say anything, no! It's not a date!" She points a finger. "The person I'm into works at Scoops."

Billy laughs obnoxiously. "Oh, god, don't tell me you're into Harrington, of all people."

"Ew, no. He's more your type."

Billy's little smile fades in an instant. "He's—no!"

Heather grins at him. "Look at you! You've always got a line for everything, but the moment I say Steve's your type, you get all flustered."

"No, it's—"

"Shut uuup. You've been clinging to that stupid high school rivalry for too long. You won't shut up about him anytime someone brings him up. You're obsessed. Maybe in love, even."

"Don't take it that far!" Billy argues.

"Just do your job, okay? You know Ellen's got one foot out the door here, so don't get in trouble." She waves before walking off.

Billy stands by the pool, clenching his fists, wondering to himself how the hell he let Heather call him out like that.

Maybe she's right, he thinks...

[bucksaiga]

I love the idea of Billy and Max gradually developing a sibling relationship.

It starts off really small. Billy is waiting for her after school instead of driving off and making her skate home.

The rides are silent for the most part, until one day Billy speaks up.

"Everything good?" He'd ask as his way of checking up on her. Max would always say yes, until one day she'd say no and tell Billy about the time a girl got snarky with her in the hallway, so the next day, Billy beats the girl's brother up in front of her.

The girl never gets snarky again, and Max realizes Billy actually cares about her problems.

She starts asking him if everything's good. He'll say yes, sometimes no, but never elaborate.

Eventually, she feels comfortable enough to ask him to drive a friend home, but only because it's an emergency. He obliges.

It happens from time to time. A friend needs a ride because of the weather, because they're going in the same direction, because they need to do a project together. Billy never complains.

Over time, they go by a silent rule. If the door's shut, fuck off, if it's cracked, you can come in.

Max would peek in in the beginning, just to see if he's there, see what he's doing.

She'd start standing in the doorway, making small talk. Billy would nonchalantly respond while preoccupied. At some point, she'd start inviting herself in, accepting the silent ajar door invitation.

It takes a lot of time, but they grow closer.

Billy admits he’s “kinda into” Steve. Max offers to talk to him, Billy says no, tells her not to get involved because he’ll “figure it out eventually.”

Max would stop standing in corners when she entered his room. Start sitting down, start lying on his bed, falling asleep complaining to him about school and whatever Lucas did.

He'd carry her to her bed, then he'd take her to get food on weekends, then he'd start picking up little trinkets and gifts that remind him of her. He'd toss them at her like they're meaningless little things he comes across. Max collects them all and starts leaving "meaningless little things" for him too.

He'd get his arm broken fighting with Neil when he defends Max.

There can't be 2 men of that house. Neil's plans fall through. Loses control. Susan and Max are siding with Billy and speaking up whenever Neil tries to hurt him. He's outnumbered and life finally gets better. He has a family.

Max always wanted a brother. Billy wanted to be happy.

Everything’s good.

[bucksaiga]

Attached, like that ❤️‍🩹 internalized homophobia tw

"...I think I'm getting too attached to you." Billy said randomly, eating the soft pretzel Steve brought him on their lunch breaks.

"What? Whaddya mean?" Steve wondered, passing the shared drink between them.

"We spend a lot of time together lately. Now, whenever I don't see you, I'm..." He fought to hold back, or tried to, but if he couldn't talk to Steve, he felt like he couldn't talk to anyone. "I get pissed when I don't get to see you. Not pissed at you, just—pisses me off. I dunno."

"I think that's normal." Steve reassured.

"I don't think it is."

"It is." Steve confirmed again. "I get pretty bummed when we can't hang out too. Only difference is...everything pisses you off. So you show anger for all your emotions."

Billy tusked, narrowing his eyes at Steve. "Fuck you."

"Lighten up." Steve playfully nudged. "I'm not givin' you shit about it. Just saying."

"Okay so, what, it's normal to be upset when we don't see each other?"

"I think so." Steve nodded. "We're friends."

"Do you get upset when you can't see Robin? Or those dweebs?"

"Hm...Now that I think about it..." He shook his head, a chuckle escaping him. "No. It doesn't bother me at all."

"So then we're too attached to each other." Billy deduced. "You know this is pussy shit, right? To be attached to another guy?"

"So what if it is?" Steve shrugged. "You mean a lot to me, Billy. We've been getting along so much better than I could've imagined."

"I can't be...that way." Billy stared off, a tense, pained look on his face. "I can't...feel these things for you. It's not natural."

"If it wasn't natural, why do we feel like this?"

"I don't have all the fuckin answers, Harrington." Billy snapped. "It...feels like I did something wrong. I did something to make me like this."

Steve turned to Billy, hoping for clarity. "Billy...do you like me?"

Billy growled as he sprang up from the spot he sat with Steve, turning his back to him. "Yeah. I fuckin like you, alright? I couldn't help it. Couldn't control my feelings. Gonna fuck off and never talk to me again, now?"

"No. I think...I like you too. I didn't think I was...that way either. But I feel the same way I felt about Nancy about you. I didn't choose this. It just happened."

Billy turned his attention back to Steve. "We gotta make it stop, Harrington. We gotta make this shit go away so we can still hang out without...becoming..." He let out a defeated sigh. "Neil would kill me."

Steve stood, slowly grabbing Billy's hand.

Billy's heart skipped a beat when their fingers touched. He pulled away and turned his back to Steve once more. "We can't do this."

"Do you wanna do this?"

Billy shrugged.

Steve stared at Billy's tense back and scrunched up shoulders, overhearing a soft sniffle.

He peeked over at Billy's face, spotting the tears when Billy pointedly turned away.

Steve placed comforting hands on Billy's shoulders prompting him to loosen up. "Look at me. C'mon." He coaxed. "We stayed up all night on prom night, talking shit and drinking. We've seriously bonded, man. You know you can tell me anything."

"I wish I didn't tell you this." Billy admitted. "Now I feel like I lost my friend."

Steve slowly spun Billy around. "No matter what happens, you're always gonna be my friend, alright? We can pretend this conversation didn't happen if you want to."

"Don't you want to?" Billy questioned. "You don't wanna be...this either, right?"

"I don't really mind. I've already come to terms with this awhile ago. But if it's too hard for you, I don't mind that either. As long as we can still hang out."

Billy intertwined his pinky with Steve's. "I can't just be your friend. The feelings aren't gonna disappear. They're too strong."

Steve gently grasped Billy's chin. Billy's heart began to race with excitement and fear. He worriedly glanced around, and Steve turned his head back towards him. "We're alone. No one's ever disturbed us in the 2 months we've been hanging out in this shed."

Billy sighed. "I fuckin' know that, but it doesn't mean I'm not scared."

"Let's take this one step at a time, then. How about a kiss—"

"No." Billy immediately refused. "If I kiss you, I'm never gonna be able to stop thinking about you. Then I'll really be in deep."

Steve laughed. "I never took you for a worrier, Billy."

"Yeah, well, I never took me for a lot of things...but here we are."

"Listen, Billy. It's our life. We can do whatever we want, and we don't have to tell anyone anything about how we feel or...what we are. We can just...be two pals in public, and we can be who we really are in the privacy of my house."

Billy liked the idea of being able to be his true self with Steve. He needed to shed away some of the expectations from his father and sort his shit out a bit, but he knew one thing for certain: He wanted Steve.

"So you like me, huh? You really like me?"

Steve nodded with certainty. "Yeah. I really do."

"So you like...wanna fuck me and stuff?" Billy asked teasingly, sticking his tongue out at Steve.

Steve turned red at the thought. "I—" He laughed. "Maybe—how about...a kiss first?"

Billy finally agreed, his lips slowly meeting Steve's. They were soft and welcoming, and tasted like pepsi and bananas. Weird combination, sure, but it was Steve's lips he kissed, and that was the best part of all.

"I uh...I have to get back to work." Steve spoke softly, their lips still ghosting one another's.

"Me too. But I'll see you later, right?"

Steve nodded. "I can't wait."

Billy stole one more kiss and watched as Steve hurried out of the shed.

They hadn't discussed the nature of their relationship just yet, but Billy wanted to take one step at a time. Each step with Steve was another step toward Billy becoming his own person.

He realized...it was okay to be...like that with Steve. It was better than being like Neil.

Billy went back to his lifeguard chair, smiling to himself, thinking about the next time he'd kiss Steve's lips.

[bucksaiga]

parental death mention

Billy received a devastating phone call from an executor, asking if they could meet at an office in town regarding his mother. 

Billy didn’t need to know much else, except the fact that it was about his mother and it was urgent. 

When he got to the office, he was given an urn, an apology, a vague explanation, and a check.

His mother died, and there was no chance of him ever seeing her again.

Billy stood in front of his car, emotionless and confused, staring down at the urn as memories of being in her arms flashed through his mind. 

And the only way he can hold her close is by clutching her urn to his chest. But the warmth was gone and he could never hope to feel it again.

He stared down at it, longingly, as if he was staring into her eyes. The sand casted urn is blonde just like her hair, iridescent and sparkling in a way he remembered the shore of the beach on their last happy day together. 

He walked, ever so slowly back to Cherry Lane, his heart heavy from the terrible news and the uncertainty of what would happen once he arrived home with the urn.

Would Neil take it away? Would he smash it right in front of him? He dreaded what the near future held.

“So…” He awkwardly began. “Nice to uh…see you again. Not what I ever imagined but…I guess death is inevitable, and we can’t predict when it will come and get us.” Billy sighed. “I hate that you’re gone. We’re not even on the same planet anymore. At least when you were alive, the fact that we lived on the same earth gave me hope. Now…now that’s just gone. What’m I supposed to do?”

He could hear a car approaching behind and glared over when it slowed down beside him.

“You okay?” 

Harrington? Why would he fucking ask that? He doesn’t care.

“I never see you on foot. Did your car break down somewhere—“

“No. I’m good. I don’t need anything.”

“What’re you carrying?” Steve asked, slowly driving beside him.

“Why’re you in my business, Harrington? We’re not even friends.”

“I’m asking because…I didn’t wanna assume but—i-it looks similar to my nana’s urn.”

Billy stopped walking, his head hanging down. “It’s my mom.” He replied despondently.

“Your mom? Jesus, I’m so sorry, man. D’you wanna talk or—“

“I told you, I’m fine.” Billy chuckled it off. “I haven’t seen her since I was 9. I don’t even care that much that she’s gone.”

Steve didn’t buy that for a second. He noticed the way Billy hung his head down and clutched the urn so close to his body like a scared child holding a teddy bear.

“Billy, your house is 20 minutes from here by foot, and mine is on the way. Why don’t you just let me drive you—“

“I’m not in a rush to go home, Harrington. Just leave me alone.” He continued walking, speeding up slightly.

“Fine.” Steve sped off.

Billy wasn’t sure why, but he felt a tinge of guilt for pushing Steve away, until he realized Steve was parking up ahead and getting out of his car. 

He froze when Steve began to run toward him. 

“If you’re gonna walk, I’ll just walk with you.”

“Why?”

“Because your mom died, man. And the fact that you didn’t try to punch me earlier says a lot.”

“I just didn’t wanna drop my mom’s urn, or I would’ve punched you.”

Steve smirked, nodding in understanding. “Fair enough. I guess I’m being annoying.”

“A little.” Billy mumbled.

“Only a little?”

“Do you want me to say that you’re getting on my fucking nerves instead?”

“Nah. A little annoying is fine.”

They continued to walk together in silence, when Billy stopped. 

“I don’t wanna go home.” 

“How come? Don’t you wanna safely store your mom’s—“

“It’s not safe there. Even in death, mom’s not safe under Neil’s roof. He’ll probably break it in front of me then make me sweep up her ashes.” His lip began to tremble at the thought.

“Hey, man, we’re not gonna let that happen, okay? My car’s right here.” He pointed. “We can go to my house. My parents never come upstairs and there’s a nice place we can set her urn. Nobody’ll mess with it and you can come see her whenever you want.”

“Why are you doing this for me?” Billy questioned.

“I already told you. Your mom died. I’m not gonna kick a man while he’s down. That’s your thing.”

Billy chuckled, causing Steve to smile. 

“So whaddya say? Wanna come back to casa Harrington and give your mom a safe place?”

Billy nodded. “Under one condition.”

“Hm?”

“Never call your house ‘casa Harrington’ again.”

Steve laughed. “Alright, alright. Deal.”

— 

Steve drove Billy to his house and showed him to a marble console table at the end of the hallway.

There wasn’t anything on it, except for an old copy of Gone With The Wind.

“This was her favorite book.” Billy mentioned, setting the urn down beside the book.

He stood back and reached into his pocket for a small seashell to place next to her urn. 

“Hm…” Steve hummed pensively.

“What?”

“No, it’s just…I dunno, her urn’s like…lopsided. I don’t want it to fall over.

Billy stood back, noticing the way her urn didn’t rest flat on the surface like it was supposed to.

“Maybe there’s something under it.” Steve suggested.

Billy lifted the urn. There was nothing on the table, so he felt the bottom of the urn, noticing a strange bump beneath the felt. 

He carefully peeled away at the felt, startled when a square fell to the floor by his feet.

He set his mother’s urn down and focused his attention on the square. 

“Is that a…floppy disk?” Steve asked as Billy picked the black square up off the floor.

“Yeah. D’you have a computer?”

“I do but uh—are you sure we should like…actually open that?”

Billy narrowed his eyes. “Why the hell not? It could be a special message from my mom.”

“Because! What if it, I dunno, self destructs or something.”

“My mom wasn’t a fucking spy, shit-for-brains. Show me where your computer is.” Billy demanded.

“Fine.”

Steve led Billy to his computer and Billy inserted the floppy disk into the drive. 

The floppy only contained two files. A photo, and an audio file.

Billy opened the photo first, frowning deeply. 

“Cute kid. That you?”

“Yeah, it’s…me and my mom at the beach.”

“Aw, you look so happy. Look at that big bright smile. And your mom, she was…she was super pretty, man. You look just like her.”

“You callin’ me pretty?” He glanced over at Steve.

Steve gulped, his eyes shifting away. “Well I mean you called me pretty before! So what’s it matter?”

Billy answered with a shrug, returning his attention to the computer. 

“You got headphones?”

“Yeah, check the drawer right there.”

Billy pulled the drawer handle and peered inside. He quickly grabbed the headphones, disregarding the condoms in the drawer beside it.

He plugged the headphones in and listened to the audio file.

“Hello, Billy. If you’re listening to this, it means I’ve passed on, which is…so unfortunate, but I learned I have cancer, and the more I struggle, the more I become aware of how little time I have left. It pains me everyday, Billy. I wish we had more time together. I’m sure you grew up to become a fine young man.”

There was a pause in the audio. Billy could hear soft sniffles.

“And I want you to continue to grow. But I’ve learned some disturbing news, about your father…have you ever wondered why we had so many nice things, even on your father’s salary? I wasn’t working, and yet I was always able to keep the finest foods on the table, and buy you the most expensive clothing. You were probably too young to think anything of it. Before you were born, your father was an active duty soldier. Now, he’s a resident spy. He has been engaging in espionage for several years and feeding classified data to Russians. You have moved very close to a secret Russian military base. I’m not sure where in Hawkins the military base is located, but this is all the information I’ve gathered over the years. I need you to promise me. Promise me. You will get away from your father before he gets you killed. I love you so much, sweetie. Take care and be safe. And…I am so sorry. I hope you’ll find it in your heart to forgive me.”

When the audio message ended, Billy removed the headphones and stared at the screen, wide-eyed.

“Billy? Everything okay?”

He slowly turned to Steve, still in disbelief. “Hey, Harrington. Can I trust you?”

“Y—what?”

“Can I trust you?”

Steve nodded. “Yeah. You can trust me.”

“My mom said my dad’s a spy. He’s been spying for the Russian military and that’s why we moved here. She thinks he’s gonna get me killed.”

“Holy shit…” Steve quietly whispered. “We need to talk to Hop.”

“What? No!” Billy shouted. “You said I could trust you!”

“Listen!” Steve exclaimed. “Hop’s been taking care of this kid, her name’s El, short for Eleven. She used to live in the Hawkins National Lab. She—she’s got powers and she was used as like a-a radio to spy on the Russian military.”

“Nah.” Billy laughed. “No that’s bullshit—“

“It’s not. I swear. You trust me, right? Then come with me.”

Billy shrugged. “I dunno about this.”

“Look This town’s got a lot of secrets. Really…weird secrets. I think it’s time you find out everything we know.”

“We? We who?”

Steve shrugged. “Sinclair, Henderson, Wheeler…Max.”

“Max?! That little shit knows things?!”

“Yes! And I tried to tell you that night we fought but you didn’t wanna hear me out.”

“It wasn’t my fault!” Billy argued.

“I know! I know! Now we…we’ve gotta figure this shit out.” Steve grabbed a walkie talkie. “We’ve got a code red. Everybody meet at the quarry ASAP.”

“Copy that!” Dustin responded.

Steve returned his attention to Billy. “Let’s go. It’s time for you to learn the truth.”

[bucksaiga]

“I’m not clingy,” Billy begins to explain as he lifts Steve’s arm and rolls into him “I just sleep better when I’m near you.”

“Okay, that’s fine, babe.”

“I feel more comfortable in your arms.”

“Fair enough.”

“Makes me feel warm. And safe. It’s not because I only want attention or something.”

“Totally, I get it.” Steve clutches Billy tight. “I sleep better when you’re in my arms.”

“You’re clingy, though.”

“A little. But I feel safe like this too.”

“Cool. We’re both safe, now.”

Steve smiles. “Yeah. We are.”

[bucksaiga]

Billy being so insecure and shy that he won't even moan during sex. He just quietly sighs when he cums.

Steve starts to worry and wonder if the sex is bad, so one day he asks Billy about it and Billy tells him the sex is great.

"It's just...I never hear you moan, or say anything."

"That's just how I am. I don't really...wanna make too much noise."

Really, he's always been told to be quiet. That his voice is annoying. That he's a burden. That he shouldn't speak unless spoken to. He thinks he shouldn't even be underneath Steve in the first place, hearing him say "I love you" or have him kissing him or telling him how good it feels to fuck him. He doesn't deserve that. And he shouldn't make a sound. He shouldn't exist.

"I wanna hear you next time."

So next time, Billy's soft sighs gradually become quiet, reluctant whimpers, and Steve's talking him through it, asking if he should go faster or slower, reassuring him, telling him how pretty his voice is, encouraging more sounds out of him.

"It's okay to make some noise. Don't hold it in, you don't need to be so shy."

Eventually, Billy breaks. He moans Steve's name for the first time, and Steve fucking explodes at the sound of his voice.

Billy realizes how much better he feels when he doesn't have to be quiet.

[bucksaiga]

Billy would totally take advantage of the fact that Steve gets distracted and talks a lot, by placing a broom in his hand while he's talking to him, to trick him into finishing the sweeping while he sits down and eats an entire roll of cookies.

Steve's just absentmindedly sweeping and telling Billy this long story and Billy's like "yeah, babe, continue" as he sits down and watches him clean.

Steve doesn't realize he got bamboozled into the cleaning until their conversation is over and Billy already left the room.

[bucksaiga]

Billy couldn't be discharged from the hospital unless he had somewhere to stay and someone to care for him.

He could hardly move on his own, needed medication and was haunted by nightmares. Simply put, he couldn't do this on his own even if tried.

The Byers moved to California, he learned, wishing he could have gone with them.

Joyce said he was more than welcome to join them when he didn't require as much medical care. Traveling in his condition was dangerous anyway.

Steve's parents ranted and raved about how incompetent Steve was and he wasn't capable of being a full-time nurse for anyone when he could hardly take care of himself. Steve just believed it was an excuse for them to say no. While Billy was in the hospital recovering, Steve was constantly by his side. The rumors spread, and everyone knew there was something between them, but Steve didn't care. He loved Billy and promised he'd check on him everyday, no matter where he was.

Mike offered up his basement, and Billy told him he would rather get flayed again than stay in his house. He'd never explain why, though.

The obvious option would be for Billy to go home, but Neil didn't want to be bothered. He called Billy a "burden" and told him to check himself into an adult care home. As much as Max hated it, she had no say in the matter.

That left Mrs. Henderson, who, upon learning Billy had nowhere else to go, offered him the spare bedroom in their house. She was recently laid off, and took a job from home stuffing envelopes.

Billy received a generous amount of hush money from the government, and was willing to pay for the room.

The first night was a little awkward. Billy had never spoken to Mrs. Henderson before, and he hadn't spoken to Dustin very much, aside from some small talk when he visited him at the hospital.

He was in too much pain to sit upright at the dinner table, so Claudia propped him up on his bed and convinced dustin to join her in keeping Billy company.

They ate together and watched Shadowlands, which Dustin and Billy found dreadfully boring.

As Claudia had her back to them, Dustin turned to Billy, mouthing about how boring the movie was.

They tried to hide their laughter, pretending to enjoy the movie when Claudia turned back to look at them.

"Wanna see something cool?" Dustin whispered.

Billy nodded. He doubted anything Dustin would show him would be cool, but he was wrong.

Dustin was working on some figurines for D&D and Billy thought they looked pretty badass.

Claudia turned to them again, smiling. "So I was watching the movie all by myself, hm?" "Sorry, mom. I thought Billy would want to see some of the stuff I was working on and—"

"It's alright, Dusty. You boys have fun playing with your toys, I'll clean the dishes."

"They're not toys mom, they're..." Dustin sighed. "She doesn't get it."

"At least she's here."

Dustin nodded. "Yeah, she's a great mom! Hey, d'you like comic books?"

"Max used to leave them lying around and I'd look at them. They're okay, I guess."

"Wait here—I mean...sorry. I forgot you...couldn't move." Dustin winced.

Billy sighed, brushing off Dustin's awkward comment. "Bring me a drink while you're up."

"You got it!"

Billy watched Dustin run out of the room, then glanced down at Dustin's figurines.

"Steve will get a kick out of knowing his best friend likes me."

[bucksaiga]

The first time Billy cries in front of Steve, he's pissed. Pissed he let himself be so weak, pissed he let the tears fall from his eyes.

He was so good at hiding it from everyone else. But Steve fucking Harrington had to come into his life, invade his heart and weaken him into a blubbering mess during his most vulnerable moments.

"What's wrong babe?" Steve would try to reach out, only to be aggressively and angrily pushed away.

"Get away from me, Steve." His words felt like a snake bite to Steve's heart. They'd worked so hard to come this far, why would he be so cruel now?

"I'm sorry, I—did I do something? Are you mad at me?"

"No!" He'd raise his voice. A volume that would make Steve flinch.

Steve would deflate, and withdraw, but not leave. He knows something's wrong with Billy, and he's so deep in love with him that he knows he's gotta be more understanding. Billy's never cried in front of him, and yet, he won't let him do a damn thing for him.

"You wanna hear a funny story?" Steve would change the subject.

"What?" Billy would sniffle.

"So I tried to pull a prank on Mr. Clarke, the middle school science teacher? And I thought it would be funny to duct tape his car."

Stupid Steve would laugh before he even finished the story, and Billy thought that was so amusing, he was already laughing along.

"It was super dark, and I'm going around the car with the duct tape thinking 'yeah, this is gonna be so funny' and it turns out, it wasn't even Mr. Clarke's car."

"Whose car was it?"

"My dad's. Apparently he was an old friend of Mr. Clarke's. I was in so much trouble that night." Steve chuckles.

"Jesus, you're such a dumbass." Billy laughs.

"Yeah. Yeah I am."

The room became silent. Steve reaches for Billy's hand when he hears another sniffle.

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to, I just want you to know that I'm here."

Billy leans against Steve as their fingers intertwine.

“I know.” And they simply leave it at that.

[bucksaiga]

Every time Billy drives them home from their dates, Steve gets indigestion. Billy drives too fucking fast. Sure, his boy's a thrillseeker. He likes to live fast, die hard, or whatever the fuck the lyrics were in that song he's blasting.

"Babe. Baby!" Steve shouts, competing with the volume of the music.

Billy turns it down and glances over at Steve. "Yeah, babe?"

"Don't you ever wanna slow down? See the sights?"

Billy snorts. "What sights? In Hawkins? You drive in a circle and you've seen it all, Steve."

"It's just—you...drive so fast, it makes my stomach hurt."

"Aw, your tummy hurts, baby?" Billy teases, reaching over to rub Steve's stomach.

"Quit it." Steve laughs, gently nudging Billy's hand away.

Billy slows down, just a little. A compromise for his baby, because he loves him, and whatever, and compromise makes things work or something.

He doesn't mind. He drives a little slower, turns the music down to a volume where he can hear it and still hear Steve.

"Thank you, Billy." Steve rubs his thigh.

"I better get some dick later."

"For...driving at the speed limit? You want me to reward you?" Steve narrows his eyes.

"No. I'm doing that compromise thing we talked about. So I want what I want."

Steve laughs. Billy still didn't get it. Any time Billy was willing to budge a little on anything, he expected to get fucked for it. Compromise wasn't a reward system, but he treated it like it was.

"Billy, compromise is where we find middle ground so we can both be happy."

"I do something to make you happy, you do something to make me happy. Then we're both happy. What's the problem?"

Steve softly sighs. "Billy. You negotiate everything with sex. Don't you feel any satisfaction from just...compromising with me?"

"No. I feel satisfaction when I win an argument, or I do whatever you wanna do and you fuck me in return. Why's it so bad if we compromise like that?"

"So...do you only do what I ask because you want something?"

"No. I do whatever you ask of me because I'm in love with you. Getting something out of it is nice, though. And if you think about it! You benefit more than I do!"

"What?!"

"How's your tummy, babe?"

"It's better now."

"So you get a smooth ride for your comfort, then you get to take me home and fuck me til your balls are empty. Who's winning here?!"

"Both of us!"

"That's compromise you fucking asshole!" Billy shouts. "Don't treat me like I'm stupid. I was compromising all along!"

There was a moment of silence before they laughed.

"I guess it doesn't matter how we do things, right? As long as we're both happy."

"Exactly, see? So you gonna fuck me good when we turn the corner, right? Because we're almost there."

"Of course I am. Compromise right?"

"Right. Compromise."