#josephine broke wilson

[goodcryunicorn]

ACTIVE MUSES!

while i work on my muses bio here are the ones that are ready for all interactions:

red = original character

$#*! my dad says (Edison Goodson III, Henry Goodson, Victoria Goodson)

2 broke girls (Caroline Channing, Jessica Levine, Josephine O'Connell, Max Black)

3rd rock from the Sun (Dick Solomon, Harry Solomon, Mary Albright, Nina Campbell, Sally Solomon, Tommy Solomon)

6 underground (one, two, three, four, five, six, seven)

007 (Aki, Alec Trevelyan, Christmas Jones, Eve Moneypenny, Felix Leiter, Giacinta Johnson, James Bond, Le Chiffre, Madelaine Swann, Manuela, Max Denbigh, Nadia Pavlov, Q, Solitaire, Teresa di Vicenzo)

7th Heaven (Ariel Camden, Lucy Camden, Mary Camden, Matt Camden, Ruthie Camden, Simon Camden)

8 mile (Alex Latourno, David Porter, Jimmy Smith)

8 Simple rules (Bridget Hennessy)

9-1-1 (Abby Clark, Athena Grant, Bobby Nash, Elaine Maynard, Evan Buckley, Henrietta Wilson, Patrick Nash, Simon Doss)

10 things i hate about you (Bianca Stratford, Chasity Church, Kat Stratford, Patrick Verona)

12 suicidal teens (Anri, Satoshi)

13 going on 30 (Jenna Rink, Matt Flamhaff)

13 reasons why (Clay Jensen, Hannah Baker, Jessica Davis)

16 wishes (Abby Jensen, Jay Kepler)

17 again (Alex O'Donnell)

18 again (Hong dae Young, Jung da Jung)

21 jump street (Douglas Penhall, Fugazy, Greg Jenko, Jane Keaton, Judy Hanson, Judy Hoffs, Patrick Benson, Tom Hanson)

24 (Audrey Raines, Chloe O'Biran, David Palmer, Eric Bauer, Eric Carter, Jack Bauer, Kate Morgan, Kim Bauer, Lara Simone, Michael Mahoney, Michelle Mahoney, Nicole Carter, Rebecca Ingram, Sherry Palmer)

[jobrookekarev]

Unexpected Delivery

Chapter One of One

Words: 3740

Summary: All Jo wanted was to go home and spend the evening on the couch with Alex, but apparently, their daughter had other plans, and so she sends Jo into labor faster than either of her parents expected. 

Fandom: Grey’s Anatomy.

Relationship: Alex Karev/Jo Wilson. 

Characters: Alex Karev, Jo Wilson, Meredith Grey, Cormac Hayes, Atticus Lincoln, and Miranda Bailey.

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences. 

Additional Tags: Fluff, Pregnancy, Birth, Baby, Birth Scene, Grumpy Pregnant Jo,

Read at AO3

Read at FFN

AN: For Nina (@doc-pickles) and her granola bar LOL

……………………………………………………………………

Jo Karev waddled over to the Peds floor. At almost 40 weeks pregnant, her baby belly was barely contained by even the largest pink maternity scrubs. Their daughter also took away her ability to walk at anything faster than the speed of a waddling duck, as she liked to complain. The second she rounded the corner to the nurse’s station, the collection of nurses there took one look at her and instantly got out of her way. They busied themselves with anything that took them away, leaving the area empty and free for Jo to pick any chair she liked. She eased herself into the one rolly chairs with memory foam padding, finally getting some relief for her aching back and feet as she melted into the chair. 

“Hello Jo, how was your day?” 

She looked up to see Hayes was finishing his post-op notes on the tablet in front of him. Of all the people around her, he was the only one that seemed to be unfazed by her grumpy moods.

“My day would have been better if Alex had met me in the lounge on time to take me home like he promised,” Jo complained as she crossed her arms and glared at Hayes as if it was his fault Alex was running late. “Where is my dear husband?”

“He's just finishing up with his last case of the day. The parents need a little extra reassurance after their son's surgery, and Karev is just talking with them. I’ll go get him,” Hayes said, sending her a smile before he left. 

Jo closed her eyes and leaned her head back, enjoying a moment of peace and quiet. She had been on her feet all day in between her two C-sections and running around the maternity ward. She was exhausted. Although, Carina had her on light duty ever since she reached 35 weeks. She urged Jo to consider taking maternity leave or at least doing half days as she was just so overly exhausted and, as a result, grumpy. However, the only thing Jo hated more than feeling exhausted at work was sitting in the Loft all alone, feeling anxious for the baby’s arrival and missing Alex. At least here at work, she could pop over and see him whenever she wanted to. 

However, the peace and quiet didn't last for long as the baby inside her squirmed and wiggle around as she kicked Jo's ribs. On top of that, as soon as the kicks ended, she had another Braxton Hicks contraction. Jo got up from the chair and put both hands on the desk in front of her as she leaned forward. The pain was unbearable and unimaginable. It felt like someone was squeezing her entire abdomen. She couldn't think, she couldn't speak, all she could do was sway her hips from side to side as somehow that helped as she willed the contraction to go away.

Suddenly Alex's hands were on her waist. He came up from behind her and wrapped his arms around her as he held her belly. Jo stood up and leaned against him, her eyes still closed as she leaned her head against his shoulder. Alex held her and whispered soft things into her ear to distract her from the pain as Jo moaned in relief. The feel of Alex's hands on her body, although it did nothing to relieve the pain, just having him there, having him support her and having him to lean against was enough. Alex held her as they gently swayed from side to side until her contraction finally passed but kept his hands on her belly.

“Hey,” Alex whispered in her ear, soft and gentle like you always was for her, as he pressed a kiss to her neck. “You ready to go home?”

Jo let out a sigh, and she leaned forward and put her hands on the counter again. “I don't think we're going home tonight.”

“What's wrong, oh,” Alex said as he let go of her and she felt him step back. Jo could almost imagine the way his eyes went wide as his lips parted into an o, and she smiled. “Was that, are you, are you in labor?”

“I may or may not have had a few contractions,” Jo admitted as she bit her lip to hid her smile before she turned around to look at Alex. His panicked expression changed into one of frustration as he greeted his teeth and put his hands on his hips. 

“Seriously, Jo,” Alex said, shaking his head and rubbing his forehead. “Okay, well, when did they start and how far apart if they've been.”

“Relax, it's only been a few hours, and my water hasn't broken, oh,” Jo gasped as if by divine intervention she felt a gush of fluids dampen her pant and run down her legs as her water broke.

“Josephine Karev, why didn't you tell me earlier,” Alex insisted as he glared at her. 

“You were in surg…” Jo trailed off as she felt the pressure in her pelvis increase and another contraction started.

If Jo thought she was in pain before, it was nothing compared to the pain she was in now. She knew that her amniotic fluid cushioned the baby's head in her uterus, and now that it was gone, she felt the full force of the baby's head bearing down on her pelvis as their baby made its way out of her.  

She could only moan and squeezed her eyes shut as she reached out for her husband. Alex took her hand and only let out a little squeak as she squeezed it as hard as she could. He instantly moved to put counter pressure on her hips from where she was still bent over. Jo leaned forward to put her head on her arms as she tried to remember to breathe in the midst of all her pain.

“They’re less than three minutes apart, for God's sake, Jo!�� Alex said in exasperation once her contraction passed.

“Not helping!” Jo yelled back at him through gritted teeth as she cried out. 

She gripped the counter with both hands and let out a groan as she pushed again. She was both familiar with this pain and yet completely inexperienced with it. She had seen it hundreds of times as she helped other people deliver their babies, but she didn't truly understand it until she felt it herself. The feel of her baby's head pushing out of her and bearing down all of their weight on her pelvis while her uterus contracted to push them out was unlike any pain Jo had ever felt. And she was no stranger to pain. Her entire body was on fire, and the pain was nearly unbearable, but she still didn't cry out. She just gripped the edge of the counter until her knuckles turned white as the beads of sweat dripped down her forehead as she was consumed by pain. 

“Okay, okay, just breathe in and out,” Alex said, modeling for her as they both took a few deep breaths before her contraction passed. “Okay, I'm going to go get Carina now?”

“Alex, wait,” Jo said, gripping his hand and pulling him back before he could run off. “I'm having this baby now.” 

“Yeah, I know that's why I'm going to go get you a wheelchair so we can head over to the maternity ward.” 

“No, Alex,” Jo said as she paused, feeling the urge to push again, as she could feel the baby’s head move down the canal and she grabbed the hem of her scrub pants to pull them down. “I'm having this baby right here, right now.”

If Jo thought he had a worried expression before, the look on Alex's face was pure panic. He was white as a sheet and grabbed her scrub pants to pull them down to the floor as Jo spread her knees. 

“Holy shit,” Alex swore, and Jo didn’t need him to explain why as she felt their baby's head in between her legs as the baby was crowning. “Jo, Jo, you need to slow down, or you're going to tear.” 

“Tell that to your daughter! She's the one who's coming out of these faster than a lightning bolt,” Jo said as she squeezed her eyes shut as she moaned in pain again, they sure did call it the ring of fire for a reason. “I was supposed to have an epidural.” 

Jo kept pushing as the contraction continued as Alex kneeled in-between her legs and coached her through it as she counted the seconds and pushed. Her body seemed to be in charge as all she could do was push until the contraction passed.

“She's got a lot of brown hair.” 

“Seriously Alex, her head is coming out of me and that's all you can say!”

“I'm sorry, I'm just freaking out a little bit here!”

“You're freaking out!” Jo yelled, glaring at him, Alex freaking out the last thing she needed. 

He peeked up at her with wide eyes as his mouth was open in an oh, clearly seeing how he messed up.

“Nope, nope, not freaking out, and I'm doing great, you just relax I got it, her, I got her,” Alex said before disappeared in between her legs and she felt his hands on the baby.

“I'm so gonna kill you after this!” Jo said, before another contraction came on and she put her chin to her chest and pushed with all her might.

Jo knew that her experience as an OB resident would help when she delivered her baby, but she didn't think she would be her own OB. Despite the pain, she tried her best to remember how to breathe, how to push, and when to take breaks, not that her baby or her body gave her any. With Alex helping her through it, she delivered the head and then the shoulders. With one more push, their daughter came into the world, and she felt a sense of relief as it was all over. The pain of pushing and her contractions momentarily passed, but she held her breath as she waited for her daughter to cry. 

There was a moment, a half-second of silence, as both she and Alex anxiously waited before she heard the baby begin to cry. Jo let out a sigh, knowing that her daughter was alive and well. She opened her eyes and turned around, still gripping the counter and leaning on it for support. She looked down to see Alex holding their pink, crying baby girl in his arms as he crouched in between her legs. Both of her parents looked at her in shock at her sudden appearance. 

“I had our baby,” Jo said, absolutely stunned as her legs gave out from under her, and she sank down to sit on the cold laminate floor in the pool of her amniotic fluid and a bit of blood, and she rested back against a file cabinet. 

“You had our baby,” Alex said as he cradled their newborn to his chest, gently swaying before he looked up at her.

It was far from the most comfortable thing, but she was too exhausted to care so long as she wasn't standing anymore. Her entire body had those hard muscle aches that came after a long day or a hard workout. She was so exhausted she could have fallen asleep right then and there, but Jo was so stunned by the little girl Alex was holding, and she wanted to meet her daughter.

Jo looked down at the crying baby in Alex's arms before she reached out for her. He passed her over and Jo instantly cradled her as she held her daughter for the first time. She began to rock and shush the baby as she had done a dozen times with other babies, but this was her daughter in her arms, and Jo just stared down at her in amazement. Soon she quieted down and opened her perfect dark eyes to stare up at them. 

“Hi,” Jo whispered as she smiled and stared down at her before she brushed her finger down her perfect cheek.

“Hello,” Alex said, and Jo could hear the tears in his voice as he got choked up. “I'm your Daddy and I'm so happy to meet you.”

Alex leaned forward to look at her as well and they both had large matching smiles. Their daughter squirmed and gave another cry as she kicked in Jo’s arms instead of in her belly like she had only moments ago. She could hardly believe that her daughter was here in her arms and that this wasn't all a dream. Jo reached out to take Alex's hand and give it a gentle squeeze as they both stared back down at their daughter. 

“She needs a blanket,” Jo said, looking around the empty nurses' station. She couldn't believe she had just given birth in the middle of the hospital with no one but Alex to help her.

“You need a blanket too,” Alex said, taking off his lab coat and putting it over her bare waist where her pants were still around her ankles.

Jo looked down and Alex's scrub shirt that was absolutely soaked in blood and amniotic fluid. Besides, she was pretty sure she peed as well in the midst of pushing their daughter out. As Alex looked around for anything to cover their daughter, Jo moved to take off her own scrub shirt. She was already sitting there with her pants down, she didn't really care as Alex helped her pull her scrub shirt over her head before she cradled her daughter against her bare skin. She felt her baby against her chest as her little chest rose and fell before Alex placed the shirt over them. The cool air felt nice against her overheated skin, and for a moment, they just sat there in stunned silence staring at the little girl who had curled up on Jo’s chest and seemed content in her mother's arms.

“Oi, where is everybody?” Hayes yelled before he looked down and saw them on the floor. Jo and Alex looked up to see him staring down at them, slacked jaw and frozen in place. “Jo, you had your baby.”

“Yeah.” Both Jo and Alex said at the same time as they turned to look back at their daughter with large smiles.

“Well, congratulations, but I'm going to go grab the nurses, Dr. DeLuca, and some blankets,” Hayes said before he ran off. 

……………………………………………………………………

Less than an hour later, Jo was settled in a postpartum room. Carina helped her finish the delivery and had cleaned up her and the baby. Now the family of three were slowly settling in for the night as they bonded with their daughter. The shock of her delivery was slowly fading away, but Alex was still a little dumbfounded. However, they were both so happy that she was here regardless of how unexpected it was. 

“You just couldn't wait to get out, could you, Eden Helen Karev,” Jo said as she smiled down at her daughter as she ran her finger down her little nose. “You were a surprise from the very beginning and you just keep surprising us.”

Alex chuckled as he pressed a kiss to the top of Eden's head. He was sitting at her bedside, leaning forward to rest his elbows on her bed, so he was right next to Eden's head. Her head was indeed too big for the regular baby hats, so instead of a hospital hat, she was wearing a light purple knitted hat from Nana Helen. Jo was thrilled to have gotten some pain killer as her perfect daughter's big head had indeed torn its way out of her. She had to have nearly a dozen stitches, but it was all worth it, mostly.

“Well, I think we've had enough surprises for one lifetime, baby girl,” Alex said as he still stared at her completely in awe. “You hear that Speedy Edie, no more surprises.”

“For once, I agree with your Daddy, not on the nickname, though,” Jo said as she glared at Alex while he just smiled at their little girl. “No more surprises, at least not for a while.”

He chuckled as he looked up at her and Jo caught his eyes as they exchanged a little laugh. They were still in disbelief that she was finally here in front of them, and they just couldn't stop staring at her, despite how she was fast asleep in Jo's arms. They were just so absolutely in love and in awe of their little girl as they got to know her and memorize her face. Eden was absolutely perfect in every way, with ten tiny fingers and ten tiny toes. She had Alex's little lips that Jo knew would turn up into his crooked smile as soon as she started smiling. She had Jo’s little nose and her eyes that, although they were a dark grey now, they both could tell they would be a brilliant shade of gold. 

As they continued to stare down at her, their quiet little moment together was interrupted by the door swinging open as Meredith frantically came into the room. 

“You gave birth!” Meredith explained before she looked down at the newborn in Jo’s arms 

“Yep, Mer, meet Eden, she decided to come out and that was that,” Alex said with a laugh and a shrug.

“She gets that determination from her mama then,” Meredith said as she walked over to them and smiled down at the little girl in Jo’s arms. “Well, hello little one.”

Meredith wasn't the only one who seemed to have just received the news of Jo giving birth as Link was hot on her heels, nearly running into the door frame. 

“You're in labor! Wait, the baby’s here already!” Link said, looking at Eden in Jo's arms as his jaw dropped. 

“In Jo’s defense Eden came really fast,” Alex said shaking his head even now, neither of them could still believe it. 

“Eden?” Link said with a smile as he came over to them. “That's a great name. Hello Eden.”

“Thank you,” Jo said as she beamed up at their friends, but before she could introduce Eden to him, Webber came into the room as well. 

“Karev, I hear congratulations are in order,” Webber said, coming over and smiling down at the little girl. Before they had time to say hello, Amelia and Maggie came into the room with nearly a dozen balloons, teddy bears, and other little gifts for the baby.

“Congratulations,” Maggie and Amelia said as they came in, filling the room with the gifts. As if to complete the party, Levi and Helm came in and offered their congratulations with a teddy bear and a balloon. 

Jo just sighed and relaxed as her family came over to her bedside and cooed over Eden while congratulating her. Jo was excited for them to meet her, and Alex proudly told the story about how Jo had given birth. As he talked, he seemed completely amazed as he just gazed over at them getting a little distracted as he stared at his wife and child. 

“Karev, what's this I hear about you giving birth at the nurse’s station?” Bailey’s booming voice filled the room as she came in looking between Jo and Eden to the party around them. “And what is all this? What are you people doing harassing the Karev’s and their newborn? Out, all of you!” 

Bailey quickly began shooing them all out of the room as they all reluctantly left, but promised to visit the next day. Jo didn't mind the big party at first, but she was exhausted and was happy to be able to rest.

“Congratulations you two,” Bailey whispered to them before she dimmed the lights and closed the door behind her.

Jo smiled as she laid back in the bed ready to get some sleep. Alex took Eden and held her as he leaned a kiss on Eden’s head before leaning forward and placing a tender kiss on her lips.

“You are amazing, Jo. Thank you for giving me this beautiful baby girl,” Alex said, staring at her with so much love in his eyes.

Despite how they had been together for more than half a century, she was still surprised when Alex said things like that to her. No one had ever thanked her for anything she had ever done, but Alex did. He made her feel loved and appreciated. And no one looked at her like Alex did. He looked at her with so much love and sometimes it still took her breath away. All she could do was smile and squeeze his hand before she reached out to brush her finger down Eden's arms before her tiny little fingers wrapped around Jo's big finger with a tight grasp. Alex settled in the chair right next to her and held her, and their daughters joined hands, as his thumb rubbed circles in the back of her hand. Jo could barely keep her eyes open, but she just stared at him and their daughter just for a moment longer. 

“Go to sleep, Jo. She'll be here when you wake up, we both will.” Alex said, nodding as she looked over at them. 

She smiled, and she sighed, Alex always knew exactly what she needed to hear. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Alex said, giving her, her favorite crooked grin. “Now get some rest, you and our baby girl deserve it.” 

“Okay,” Jo finally relented and closed her eyes.

She still hung on to the feeling of Alex holding her hand and Eden’s fingers wrapped around hers. Her family was right next to her and she didn't want to ever let them go.

[iamtrebleclefstories]

maybe it’s wrong to say I love you - part three Part Three: This Love

this love is good, this love is bad, this love is alive back from the dead

In honor of Nina’s ( @doc-pickles​ ) birthday, enjoy Part 3 of this fic that has taken my whole heart. It’s a super long, monstrosity of an update, but I hope it’s everything you never knew you needed. It might be my favorite thing I’ve ever written. Let me know what you think in the comments!

Find parts one and two on my Master List

-This love is good-

-This love is bad-

Since deciding to stay in Seattle two days ago, Alex hadn’t had a chance to apologize to Jo for what he’d said. He hadn’t seen her around the hospital and was beginning to worry that maybe he’d caused her to run. Tired of acting like a wuss, Alex finally made his way over to L&D where he knew she spent most of her time. It wasn’t that far or out of the way for him since the NICU was on the same floor, but he didn’t venture to that side more than a couple times a week.

As Alex was nearing the L&D doors, he heard a couple whimpers coming from a supply closet on his left. He paused and pressed his ear to the door, trying to figure out what was going. Realizing that there was definitely someone inside the room crying, Alex knocked quietly and let himself in.

“Hey, I just heard some crying outside and I wanted to make sure everything was okay,” Alex scanned the room for the source of the cries. He locked eyes with teary-faced Jo. “Jo.”

“What are you doing here?” Jo’s eyes red from crying. “I thought you left for Baltimore.”

“I decided to stay,” Alex stepped closer and crouched down to where she was seated in the corner. Jo looked at him expectantly so he responded. “I couldn’t leave things the way they were. I didn’t mean what I said the other night. I’m sorry. We matter. You matter. Our friendship matters. And I don’t know about you, but I’d really love to have my best friend back.”

“I’m sorry too,” Jo sniffled. “I was just… I’m going through something and everything just kind of came crumbling all at once. Part of it was me being pissed as hell at you, but the other part was me just projecting my own issues.”

“Are you okay? Is it Paul?” Alex sat down next to her on the floor. “Because I swear if he got out early and tries to come find you, I’ll—”

“No it’s not Paul,” Jo let out a watery laugh. “It has nothing to do with him.”

Alex watched as Jo began crying again, her chest heaving slightly as she fought with whatever was plaguing her thoughts. Unable to resist this time, Alex placed his arm around her shoulders and brought Jo into a hug for the first time in over three years. He waited patiently as Jo broke down in his arms, rubbing her back and shoulders comfortingly.

There was something about being in Alex’s embrace after so long that made her finally give into the emotions she was feeling. Maybe it was because despite their rocky history, Jo knew she was completely and utterly safe to be one hundred percent herself around him. She felt secure enough to truly process all of the changes she’d experienced in the last seventy-two hours.

“I’m pregnant,” Jo shared quietly after minutes of silence. She felt Alex’s body tense slightly and hesitate in his movements before nodding, a signal for her to continue. “I found out four days ago. I’m about eight weeks.” Jo paused and let her eyes flit over to Alex’s face. His eyebrows were raised in surprise, but he nodded at her to keep going. “I—uh, I’ve been suspecting it for a couple weeks now. I’m a fetal surgeon. I’m surrounded by pregnant women every day.” Jo huffed a laugh. “But, I think I was so far in denial that I didn’t want to recognize it. Anyway, I took a blood test four days ago and it confirmed my suspicion. That’s why I was a mess when we spoke two days ago. I’d been holding onto this secret all by myself and didn’t know how to handle it, so I just yelled at you, because I knew I couldn’t talk to you about what was going on in my life without breaking down exactly like I did a few minutes ago.”

“Are you feeling okay?” Alex asked, concerned. “Does the father know?”

“You remember that douche-bag ex-boyfriend I mentioned?” Jo laughed ironically. “Well, after the argument you and I had, I called him. I thought you were leaving and never wanted to see me again, so I might as well call Jason and see if I could fix things. We were gonna have a baby.” Jo took a deep breath and wiped a couple straggling tears. “When I told him that I wanted to keep the baby, he wasn’t happy. He said that he wasn’t going to put his career on hold and neither should I over a mistake. So, I suggested getting him in the OB program here. We could work together again and raise the baby together… That's when he yelled at me. He wanted me to have an abortion and I said no. Then he said, ‘yeah go ahead and have the baby. You’ll be having it alone in Seattle. Don’t call me again, or try to contact me for help.’ And he hung up.”

“I’m gonna be a single mom,” Jo bit her lip as she tried to hold back some tears. “And I’m okay with that. I’ve come to terms with that. I’m ready for this. I’m ready to be a mom. Sure, the timing could’ve been better and I never pictured it happening this way, but I want this baby. I want to do this. I’m just… I’m scared. What if I’m not good at it?”

��Jo, you’ve never not been good at something,” Alex looked at Jo for a moment in awe. She really was the strongest person he had ever met. “For what it’s worth, I think you’ll be a great mom.”

“I have my first appointment tomorrow,” Jo sighed. “That’s why I was in here, crying. I couldn’t stop thinking about how I never pictured myself going to my first prenatal appointment alone. I could ask Mer or Bailey, but they both have a lot on their plates right now. They don’t need something else to worry about.”

“Why don’t I go with you?” Alex suggested.

“I’m sorry, what did you say?” Jo made a face and pulled away slightly from his embrace in order to get a good look at him.

“I can go with you,” Alex repeated. “Just tell me what time and exam room you’ll be in and I’ll be there.”

“I don’t know, Alex,” Jo shook her head. “Just because I cried in front of you doesn’t mean you have to feel like you have to go. I can handle it by myself. I’m good at being alone. I’ve gotten used to it.”

“But that’s the thing. You don’t have to be alone. Not anymore,” Alex took her hand in his own. “You’ve got people now. So many people who give so many craps about whether or not you’re okay. You’ve got me and I mean it this time. I know I haven’t given you much reason to trust me, but I want to be your friend again.”

“Alex…”

“Listen, you told me once that you pictured doing this with me, so let me go with you. Not as your boyfriend or whatever, but as your friend. You shouldn’t be alone. You were there for me when I got shot. I didn’t know that back then, but I know that now. I want to be there for you,” Alex’s mouth curved into a crooked grin. “Besides, if I don’t go with you the nurse is gonna give you that stupid pitying look and ask if ‘you wanna discuss your options.’ I’m doing you a favor.”

“You know, I really hate that you know me so well that you knew exactly what to say,” Jo let out a short laugh, “Fine. You can come. My appointment is tomorrow morning at 8am. Meet me here. Don’t be late.”

—————

-This love is alive back from the dead, oh, oh, oh-

8 Weeks

“You came,” Jo stared at Alex in slight disbelief as he walked up to her outside the OB/GYN wing.

“Of course I came. I told you I’d be here,” Alex gave her a shy smile. “You okay?”

“Nervous,” Jo shoved her hand into her pockets. “Just because I want this doesn’t make it any less nerve wracking or scary. I’m just glad I’m not alone.”

“I’m glad you told me and I get to be here with you,” Alex grabbed her hand and squeezed it lightly. “Did you already sign-in?”

“No not yet,” Jo shook her head. “I haven’t walked in yet. I was waiting.”

“Well, I’m here so, let go,” Alex held the door open and walked closely behind Jo as she went up to the front desk to check in for her appointment. Once she was done, he placed his hand on the small of her back and guided her over to a set of chairs in the corner.

After a few minutes, a nurse stepped out and called her name, “Josephine Wilson.”

Jo stood up and looked back at Alex expectantly. He stood up and gripped her hand in his own, walking back towards the exam room with her. The nurse gave her the same instructions that Jo herself had listed off to patients countless times.

“Alright, just remove your pants and get settled onto the exam table, legs in the stirrups. If you want, I’ve left a gown on the table for you to change into. Dr. Hopewell will be in shortly.”

Jo nodded and began removing her scrubs, handing them to Alex who folded them and placed them on the chair next to him. She donned the gown and slipped her panties off swiftly, tucking them in between her pants. She took a shaky breath as Alex helped her up onto the table, “Thank you. For coming. It means a lot. It’s nice to not be alone.”

“There’s no place I’d rather be,” Alex pressed a kiss on the hand that was being held firmly in his own. “You are and always have been my best friend. You were there for me in my darkest moments and you celebrated with me during some of my happiest ones. There’s no way I’d want to be anywhere else rather than here with you, right now. And if you let me, I plan on being here for you for the long run.”

They were interrupted by a knock on the door. A young woman in her thirties walked in, a surprised look on her face, “Dr. Wilson. And Dr. Karev. It’s a surprise seeing you here.”

“Dr. Hopewell,” Jo smiled shyly. “Call me Jo. We work together and you’re about to see all my lady-bits so might as well drop the formalities.”

Dr. Hopewell chuckled, “Well, Jo, call me Amanda.” She got into position and fired up the ultrasound machine as Jo placed her legs up in the stirrups. “I have to say, I didn’t expect to see you on this side of the table.”

“Neither did I,” Jo mumbled. “But life happens and you roll with the punches.”

“So I take it this was not a planned pregnancy,” Amanda asked.

“Definitely not,” Jo huffed a short laugh. “But it is wanted.”

“Okay,” Amanda smiled and looked over at Alex. “How are you feeling?”

“Oh, I—uh, I’m not the dad,” Alex stuttered. “I’m just here to support Jo.”

“Alex is my best friend,” Jo looked up at Alex to see his face of surprise at her admitting that she still saw him that way after so many years. “He didn’t want me to be alone for my first appointment.”

“That’s really kind of you Karev. If only there were more friends like you,” Amanda gave him a small smile before turning her attention back to Jo. “I don’t mean to pry, but I just want to have all the facts straight so that way I can best support you during this pregnancy. Is the father out of the picture?”

“Yes,” Jo answered, biting her lip. “It’s just me.”

“Alright,” Amanda nodded. “You know that means that I will be available to you should you ever need my help. You also need to surround yourself with a great support system. You need people that will help you when you need help, even when you’re too stubborn to ask for it. Single moms are notorious for believing that they are not allowed to ask for help. Don’t fall into that trap. Find your people, your tribe. Although, I see you are off to a very good start considering that Dr. Karev is here with you today.”

“She’s got people,” Alex gave Jo a crooked smile and turned back to Dr. Hopewell. “So, are we gonna see this baby or what?”

“Yes! Alright, Jo, we’re doing a vaginal ultrasound today. I’m going to stick the transducer inside you now. It’s going to be cold and you might feel some pressure or discomfort, but never pain. If it hurts let me know and I’ll stop,” Amanda smiled encouragingly. “Okay, I’m starting now.”

Jo winced slightly at the intrusion of the transducer and tried her best to stay relaxed. She felt Alex run his free hand through her hair, providing a welcome distraction as Hopewell looked on the screen for the fetus. Amanda moved and adjusted her position a few times before an image finally came up on screen, “Aha, there it is. There’s your baby.”

Jo watched in wonder as she saw the tiny blob on the screen. She felt Alex squeeze her hand again as he laughed, “Hey, would you look at that. There’s a baby in there. A tiny Baby Wilson.”

“Woah,” Jo let out and smiled. She looked over to Amanda who’d been taking some measurements. “Can we hear the heartbeat?”

“Of course,” Amanda reached over on the machine and punched some buttons before a steady, quick sound exited the speakers.

“Oh,” Jo gasped and lifted a hand to cover her mouth as she listened to her baby’s heartbeat flutter through the speakers. Tears collected in her eyes at the sound. “Hey, baby.”

“Jo, you’re gonna be a mom,” Alex grinned down at her and wiped a couple tears that had trickled down her face. He felt his own eyes grow watery at the sight and sound of the little life currently developing in Jo’s womb.

Fifteen minutes later, Jo and Alex were walking out of the exam room, each with an ultrasound photo in their hands. Alex beamed as he looked down proudly at the picture he was holding, “I’m gonna put this on my fridge.”

“You are way too excited about this,” Jo rolled her eyes.

“Of course I’m excited,” Alex wrapped his arm around Jo’s shoulder. “I’m going to be an uncle!”

“An uncle?” Jo raised her eyebrows. “Who said that you’re going to be an uncle?”

“I did,” Alex replied simply. “I better be an uncle. Actually, I better be the godfather.”

Jo’s eyes shined in amusement, “We’ll see.”

“We’ll see?” Alex made a face. “Oh, hell no. You want to continue having an appointment buddy, I want to at least be Uncle Alex.”

“Fine. You can be Uncle Alex,” Jo laughed.

“Thank you.”

—————

-These hands had to let it go free, and-

-This love came back to me, oh, oh, oh-

11 Weeks

“You okay?” Alex lingered in the doorway of the bathroom of the frat house as he heard Jo puking into the toilet.

“No,” Jo groaned and lifted her head to see Alex’s look of concern. “I’m sorry. I know I came over to help you furnish this place since obviously neither you or Cristina are capable of doing it on your own and now I’m here monopolizing your bathroom.”

“Jo, it’s fine. You don’t have to apologize for having morning sickness,” Alex walked into the bathroom and crouched down by Jo, pulling her hair back. “I thought you’d gotten past the morning sickness already, though.”

“So did I,” Jo retched.

“Ew, morning sickness Jo?” Cristina entered the bathroom.

“Uh huh,” Jo nodded weakly, leaning her head against Alex’s chest. “I think I’m okay. You guys can go. I’m just going to rinse my mouth out.”

“Okay,” Alex motioned for Cristina to follow him out of the bathroom.

Cristina and Alex wandered into the kitchen and waited for Jo to come out of the bathroom. Cristina stared at the eight week ultrasound photo on the fridge that had given away the news of Jo’s pregnancy when she saw it hanging after showing up unannounced. She eyed Alex suspiciously, “You’re really invested in this.”

“Of course I am. She’s my best friend,” Alex scrunched his face in confusion.

“Are you sure the kid isn’t yours?” Cristina raised an eyebrow.

“Already told you it isn’t,” Alex shot Cristina an unimpressed look. “She’s eleven weeks pregnant. She’s been back for seven. I think you know how to add. Besides, it’s not like that between us. We’re just friends.”

“Just friends my ass,” Cristina scoffed. “I’ve been back for two days and I can tell you are still as in love with her as you were the first time.”

"Okay, yeah i love her. So, what?" Alex shrugged. "I think I always will, but that doesn't mean that I'm gonna do anything about it. She's pregnant and she's moved on and she doesn't need me complicating her life with feelings. Maybe one day it will be different, but right now, this is the way things are. So, I'm just gonna be a good friend to her and I'm gonna be there for whatever she and this baby need."

"Who are you and what have you done with Evil Spawn?" Cristina mused.

"Shut up," Alex rolled his eyes.

Cristina was about to open her mouth to speak again when Jo walked out of the bathroom. Cristina shut her mouth quickly, gaining a strange look from Jo. Jo narrowed her eyes at her two friends,  "What?"

"Nothing." Cristina and Alex answered in tandem.

"Well, I'm going to Mer's house. I probably won't come back tonight, so try not to burn the house down while I'm gone," Cristina nodded at the pair and made her way out the house.  

“Don’t tell Mer!” Jo yelled after her.

“I won’t,” Cristina yelled back.

"She should've just moved in with Mer and Derek," Jo commented as she watched Cristina walk out the door. “Doesn’t she have a room over there?”

“Yup,” Alex chuckled. “I don’t pretend to understand them.”

Jo forced a smile as she felt some dizziness. She closed her eyes for a second, hoping that Alex wouldn’t notice the shift in her demeanor. Of course, she should’ve known that Alex was overly attentive of her every change in mood.

“What’s going on?” Alex asked as he led Jo to take a seat on the staircase since there wasn’t any furniture in the house yet.

Jo took a couple deep breaths, “Somethings wrong. Alex, something is really wrong.”

“Are you in pain? Are you bleeding?” Alex searched frantically for any sight of blood or tenderness in her abdomen.

“I need to go to the hospital. I need an ultrasound. I need to see my baby,” Jo’s breaths grew shallower.

“Okay, Jo. Calm down. Think rationally. You’re a fetal surgeon. You know what things to look for in case something is wrong. You’re probably just dehydrated,” Alex tried to soothe her.

“That’s my point, Alex. I am a fetal surgeon. I know exactly what can go wrong. I have every worst case scenario running through my head right now and that scares the crap out of me because I didn’t know you could love someone so much. If something goes wrong, I can’t help this baby. I can’t operate on myself,” Jo placed a hand on her still flat stomach and wiped a couple straying tears with the other. “So please, don’t look at me like I’m crazy when I ask you to take me to the hospital. Something doesn’t feel right. Please, I just want an ultrasound. I need to make sure my baby is okay.”

Alex saw her distress and conceded, "Okay. We'll go right now."

By the time they’d arrived at the hospital, Jo had begun bleeding. She was shaking with fear as Alex helped her out of the car and carried her into the ER. He bypassed the front desk and placed her on an empty bed, ignoring the confused stares from the likes of Owen and Bailey.

Alex flagged down an intern and barked orders, fear evident in his voice, “You! Drop whatever you’re doing. Get me a portable ultrasound right now!”

The terrified intern scurried over to do as Alex had instructed. Alex leaned down to press a light kiss on Jo’s forehead as she clutched his hand tightly, “Hey. You’re okay. Whatever happens, you’ll be okay. Do you want me to page Hopewell or Herman?”

“No, we don’t call the big guns until there’s something to worry about,” Jo shook her head. “You do it. I trust you.”

“What’s going on here?” Owen asked as he walked up to Jo’s bed.

“Is everything alright, Wilson?” Bailey rushed over to Jo’s bedside.

“I think I might be having a miscarriage,” Jo trembled.

Bailey’s eyes opened wide, “Oh sweetheart.”

“Where the hell is that damn ultrasound?” Alex growled in annoyance.

“Right here!” The intern Alex had tasked with retrieving the ultrasound machine finally came back with the device in hand. “Do you want me to—”

“Just give it to me,” Alex grabbed the machine and got it ready. He had Jo pull up her shirt and he squirted the gel on her abdomen, placing the probe on her stomach. The doctors let out a collective sigh of relief when they heard the heartbeat flutter through the speakers. “It’s okay, Jo. You see? The baby is okay. He or she is in there having a party.”

“Oh thank God,” Jo let out a quiet sob, feeling Bailey smooth her hair down in a comforting manner. She placed her hand on the screen. “Hi baby. You scared the crap out of me. Don’t do that ever again, please. I already love you so much.”

Alex felt all his worries dissipate as he spoke to Jo’s stomach, “God, you really enjoy freaking us out, don’t you?”

“You’re having a baby? My baby is having a baby?” Bailey asked, a smile on her face.

“Yeah,” Jo nodded and wiped a few tears away. “I’m having a baby.”

“Congratulations,” Owen smiled sincerely. He turned to look between Alex and Jo. “So are you two back together or..?”

“Oh, no. I’m not the dad,” Alex laughed awkwardly. “I’m just here as a friend. She was at my house to help me pick out furniture when she asked me to take her to the hospital.”

“Hmm,” Bailey raised an eyebrow, partly unconvinced, partly sure that those two would be together again eventually. “Well, I’m going to call OB down to give you a full work-up. They’ll take blood work and everything.”

“Yes, I’ll make sure that we figure out what’s going on. The baby looks fine though, so I’m not sure why you’re bleeding,” Owen spoke to Jo. “I’m also going to set you up in a room overnight. I know that’s not common but I also know that if I release you, you’re going to want to come in tomorrow morning to work and that’s not going to happen. So, you’re staying here.”

“Fine,” Jo huffed. “But only because I know I need to take it easy if I want to keep cooking this baby for six more months.”

“I’ll stay with you,” Alex said as he wiped the gel off of her stomach and put the machine away.

“Alex, you don’t have to. I’ll be okay on my own,” Jo placed a hand on his arm.

“I know you will. But you don’t have to be. I want to stay with you,” Alex insisted, covering her hand with his own. “Let me stay with you.”

“Okay,” Jo‘s lips twitched slightly.

Bailey and Owen watched from the side as Alex fretted over Jo and yelled at interns to do their jobs right. The two exchanged a look and Owen spoke, “For someone who isn’t the father, he sure is acting like it.”

“He’s in love with her,” Bailey shrugged. “He’s been in love with her practically since day one. He hasn’t said it, but he could care less if that baby was his or not. She’s his person. He’s still going to love her. He’s still going to be there for her and protect her. That’s who he is.”

——————

-Lantern, burning-

-Flickered in the night, only you-

13 Weeks

“Guess what!” Jo grinned as she walked into the attendings’ lounge.

“What?” Cristina asked as she looked up from the medical journal she’d been reading.

“Look!” Jo lifted up her shirt to reveal the tiniest beginnings of the curve of her stomach. “I’m starting to get a bump!”

“Hey baby Wilson,” Alex beamed and walked up to place a hand on Jo’s abdomen. “It’s good to see you.”

“You’re such a dork,” Jo rolled her eyes. “Anyway, that’s not the only reason I came in here this morning. I also have the results back from the prenatal screening. Baby seems to be completely healthy.”

“That’s great,” April said from her spot by the coffee machine.

After Jo’s scare that had her in the hospital a two weeks ago, everyone found out about her pregnancy rather quickly. After all, gossip made its way around the hospital like wildfire. It wasn’t a surprise when Jo woke up the morning after the ordeal to find Meredith glaring at her from the doorway of her hospital room. Once the initial shock and round of questions wore off, everyone had gotten excited and supportive rather quickly.

“Okay, so what’s the verdict?” Meredith asked. “Am I getting fifty dollars from Avery or not?”

“I’m the one getting the fifty dollars. It’s definitely a girl,” Jackson crossed his arms over his chest in confidence.

“Nope,” Meredith shook her head. “It’s definitely a boy. Jo is such a boy mom. She gives off boy mom energy.”

“Okay everyone say your last minute predictions before I open up the envelope,” Jo chuckled.

“I say boy,” Callie took a sip of her coffee.

“Girl,” Bailey narrowed her eyes. “Yes. A girl.”

“It’s gonna be a girl,” Cristina flipped through the pages of her medical journal. “Alex is the godfather. There’s no way this kid isn’t going to end up being Evil Spawn’s worst nightmare. It has to be a girl.”

“I second that,” Derek laughed.

“No, I think it’s a boy,” Richard placed a hand on his chin.

“A boy,” April pitched. “No, a girl. No… yes… a girl. Final answer.”

“I say a boy,” Arizona smiled.

“I’m gonna go with a boy as well,” Owen nodded with Arizona.

“What about you Evil Spawn?” Cristina asked. “What do you think the baby is gonna be?”

“I don’t really care to be honest,” Alex shrugged. “As long as my godchild is happy and healthy, I could care less… but I kind of hope it’s a girl.”

“Alright, stop messing around and open the envelope,” Meredith urged.

“Okay,” Jo took a deep breath and tore the envelope open, carefully removing the paper from inside. She unfolded it and gasped. “It’s a girl!”

“Pay up Grey!” Jackson held his hand out as Meredith grumbled and retrieved fifty bucks from her purse.

“It’s a girl!” Alex grinned brightly and wrapped Jo in a tight hug. “You’re having a Baby Girl Wilson.”

“You should name her Cristina,” Yang shouted across the room. “Cristina Wilson has a nice ring to it.”

“No way,” Jackson shook his head. “Her name is gonna be Avery Wilson. I’m the one who said she was gonna be a girl first.”

“You could always go with Robbin,” Arizona smiled. “It’s a sweet nature-y name.”

“If she names the baby after anyone, it’s going to be me,” Meredith rolled her eyes. “I’m the one who kept in contact with her and helped her all those years. Besides, she has so many options if she names the baby after me. There’s Meredith, Mary, Merella, Greyson, Greysie, Mere, and I could come up with a lot of really obscure ones if given the time.”

“Love the suggestions, but not happening,” Jo laughed at her friends. "I'm not going to name her after one of you and have the rest of you hate me for it later."

“Exactly. Jo’s not going to choose between one of you guys to name her child after,” Alex smirked. “Not when we all know that the baby is going to be named Alexandra after me, her Uncle Alex.”

“Shut up,” Jo shoved him playfully. “You’re lucky I’m even letting her call you Uncle Alex. I could revoke that privilege.”

“No you can’t. Because if you did, then I wouldn’t show you the stash of chocolate pudding you’ve been craving in the lounge fridge that no one else is allowed to touch.”

“You got me the pudding I’ve been craving?” Jo gasped.

“Sure did,” Alex opened the fridge to show her the stocked shelves full of multiple boxes of chocolate pudding. “There’s a sticky note with your name on the boxes so that no one takes them. Make sure you ration it wisely.”

Jo stared at the open fridge in joy. She threw her arms around Alex’s neck and hugged him tightly, “You are the best!”

“God, he’s whipped,” Cristina commented to the rest of the doctors quietly observing the pair. “He’s so whipped he doesn’t even realize it.”

“I mean, are you really that surprised?” Meredith shrugged one shoulder. “It’s Jo we’re talking about.”

“I always liked those two together,” Richard leaned against the wall. “I never understood why he married Stevens. Not that she wasn’t a great girl—because she was—but Karev and Wilson were always different.”

“Sometimes it takes you awhile to find your way back home,” Derek wrapped his arm around Meredith. “They’ll figure out eventually.”

“A hundred bucks says they’ll cave and get together after the baby is born,” Jackson placed a bet.

“One-fifty says they get together before the baby is born,” Callie pitched in.

“Two-hundred says they get together before she hits the thirty-week mark,” Arizona grinned.

“Oh please,” Cristina rolled her eyes. “It’s Karev and Wilson. Knowing them, they’re gonna end up having crazy monkey sex for a couple months until someone cracks and word-vomits all their feelings.”

“Two-fifty says they’re going to do it first and have feelings later,” Meredith stuck her hand out in a challenge.

“You’re on,” Jackson shook Meredith’s hand.

Oblivious to the conversation going on around them, Jo and Alex continued lost in their own little world as Jo opened one of the pudding packs. Jo let out a moan, “Hell yes. This is exactly what I’ve been craving.”

“Glad you and the baby are enjoying it,” Alex smiled at her proudly.

“Ooh! I almost forgot to ask, are you going to come with me to look at more houses today after work?”

“Yeah, I’ll go with you,” Alex reached over to take a spoonful of her pudding, gaining a glare from Jo. “I don’t know why you’re so focused on trying to buy a house. Your apartment is really nice. It’s twenty minutes away from the hospital and five minutes away from me.”

“It’s a fifth floor studio apartment that has no elevator,” Jo scoffed. “I don’t exactly love the idea of having to carry my baby as well as groceries up five flights of stairs.”

“Good point,” Alex nodded. “Well, I’ve got surgery in twenty minutes, but I will see you later.”

“Sounds good,” Jo stuffed her face with another serving of chocolate pudding.

By the time the end of their shifts rolled around, Jo was utterly exhausted. Being in her second trimester, Jo was hoping that she’d gain some of her energy back soon. She’d seen plenty of moms that bounced back from various states of exhaustion once they made it past the twelve to fourteen week mark.

Jo was slumped against one of the benches outside the hospital when she heard Alex’s voice behind her, “Someone looks like they need a nap.”

“What I need is a foot rub. I just got out of a TTTS procedure and I don’t know why but my feet are burning,” Jo cast a sideways glance to Alex. “I just got off the phone with my real estate agent and guess what?

“What?” Alex asked as he sat down beside her.

“The house that I was considering has been sold.”

“Crap. Really?” Alex frowned. “What are you going to do now?”

“I don’t know,” Jo shrugged. “All of the other houses in my budget are an hour and a half away from the hospital so that’s not going to work. I guess I’m just going to have to stay in my studio apartment.”

“Why don’t you just officially move into the house with me and Cristina? You’re there all the time anyway,” Alex suggested.

Jo looked at Alex strangely, “You do know I’m having a baby right?”

“I’m not stupid,” Alex rolled his eyes. “I’m serious. Don’t worry. I’ll help you with the crib.”

He obviously was not understanding what Jo was trying to say. Jo stared at him dumbfoundedly, “That's not what—Are you sure? I don’t think Cristina is gonna like having to live across the hall from a screaming baby in a few months. I don’t think you’re going to want to sleep across the hall from a screaming baby either.”

“Jo, I’m serious,” a genuine expression on Alex’s face. “Move in with us. Cristina is barely home, she’s not gonna care. If anything, she’ll be happy because now her rent is gonna go down.”

“I don’t know… it feels weird,” Jo wrinkled her brow in thought.

“Why would it be weird?” Alex asked honestly. “Jo, it’s a frat house. Mer always left that house open for whoever needed it and as long as I own it, I’m gonna do the same. It’s your home, and you’ll always have a place there if you need it.”

“You’re absolutely positive about this?”

“Yes, Jo. I’m positive,” Alex held her hand gently. “Move into the house. I want you there.”

Jo looked down at their interlocked hands shyly and sighed, “Okay.”

——————

- Your kiss, my cheek -

- I watched you leave-

16 Weeks

“Ugh,” Jo groaned in frustration as she threw another failed attempt at knitting a pair of baby booties at the wall of her bedroom, feeling hot tears running down her face.

“You okay?” Alex popped his head into the room only to see Jo laying there on the bed with tear-stained cheeks.

“No!” Jo cried. “I can’t get this stupid thing right. I am a maternal fetal surgeon who can perform complicated procedures on tiny babies in the womb but I can’t even knit a damn pair of booties for my baby.” Jo covered her face with her hands and let out a muffled shout. “I’m sorry. It’s the hormones… so many damn hormones.”

Alex cautiously took a seat on the bed. He placed a hand on her knee causing her to flinch, “Okay… but you’re not in pain or anything right?”

“No,” Jo shook her head, face still covered.

“Then what is it really? Because you can blame it all on the fact that you can’t knit to save your life, but that’s not really gonna help anyone,” Alex’s face twitched up into a grin. “Are you upset about something else? Are you craving something? Because I can run down to the store and get it for you.”

“I’m horny!” Jo shot up into a sitting position, more tears leaking from her eyes. “I’m really freaking horny but I can’t have sex because no one is gonna sleep with a pregnant lady and I just want to have sex Alex, but my baby’s father is a son of a bitch and he’s living across the country and wants nothing to do with us.”

Alex gingerly placed a hand on her back, patting it lightly as she let another frustrated cry into his shirt. With wide eyes and an unsure expression on his face, he decided to make a suggestion, “We can get you a vibrator?”

Jo whipped her head around to look at Alex who shrugged like a dumbass. She let out a huff and flopped back onto the bed, staring at the ceiling. He really was an idiot , Jo thought. She attempted to keep her focus on her breathing and the marks on the ceiling when she felt Alex’s hand make its way to her slightly curved belly. He rubbed small circles on it for some moments when she spoke up again.

“Alex.”

“Hmm?”

“I need you to leave.”

“What? Why?” Alex paused his movements to look at her strangely.

Jo groaned, “I need you to leave because I’m very horny and you’re still… very, very sexy and you just—you have to go before I jump your bones.”

Alex raised his eyebrows in amusement, looking as though he wanted to laugh. He really was trying his hardest to be a good friend, but he couldn’t help how funny he found the situation. Thinking of possible ways to help Jo out, Alex slowly moved his hand up from her small bump to her sensitive breasts, pinching her nipples slightly. He leaned down and whispered in her ear, “You sure you want me to leave?”

“I changed my mind. Please stay.”

Alex smirked smugly and placed a pillow behind Jo’s back, making sure she was in a comfortable position.

His hand reached underneath her oversized tshirt and brushed against her heat, eliciting a quiet gasp. His fingers found the waistband of her underwear, and he tugged them down as she lifted her ass, letting him pull them over her butt and down past her thighs. Then, lifting one leg at a time and tossing it somewhere on the floor behind him.

He took a moment to collect himself and stare down at her—because God, it had been years since he’d seen her this way and he wanted to savor this moment—before pushing her legs further apart, giving him much better access.

Alex could tell just by looking at Jo that she was already wet. She squirmed impatiently, giving him the perfect view of her glistening skin. Alex held back a groan. Everything within him was crying out to relive those old stolen moments in on-call rooms, the back of his car, and the occasional (but very few) times they were in this very house alone.

He decided to start with his finger, placing it against her and rubbing it up and down and side to side, feeling the dampness beneath his fingers and taking in the feel of her soft, warm folds. He made sure to stroke every inch of her, over and over, concentrating on making sure it was pleasing to her. He could tell by the slight hitches in her breathing that it was.

Jo had almost forgotten what it was like to be touched by Alex. She’d almost forgotten the feel of his thick fingers inside of her. She’d almost forgotten the way he could reduce her to a puddle of incoherent mumbles with just his hands. She was reminded of the stark power and dexterity of his hands as his finger explored her most intimate region.

Alex added a second finger and began to rub her faster and harder, this time going up to her clit and drawing his finger over it. At his touch, Jo made a kind of muffled sound. He went back to rubbing her, alternating his strokes between hard and soft, between slow and quick, repeating the process over and over, never staying with a rhythm for long enough that she would get used to it, listening carefully as her breathing became more shallow and her body quickly grew wetter until he was having trouble staying on her because of the slick.

Finally, he decided, it was time. Alex stroked his fingers downward, but instead of going back up as he had been doing, he slipped a finger inside her, pushing through the wet heat and taking in how amazing she felt around him. God, he had missed this. She was always so tight and hot, and he wanted to stay inside her forever.

His dick ached in his pants at the sound of her soft moans, but this was not about him or what he wanted. This was about Jo. Alex concentrated just on her, moving his finger in and out, pushing in as deeply as he could, slowly at first and then speeding up as he went on.

Jo groaned as he fucked her. “Yes,” she gasped, and closed her eyes. Her hands were fisting the comforter on either side of her. “Yes, Alex. Don’t stop.”

She didn’t need to tell him; he wouldn’t have stopped if his life depended on it. Not with the noises she was making.

He added a second finger, plunging both of them in and out of her, as deep as he could get them. She moaned again, her hips starting to grind against his hand, head tilted back in pleasure.

A feeling of pride spread through his whole body. Watching her starting to come undone and knowing he was the reason, was something else he didn’t think he could explain if anyone asked.

Alex thrust into her harder, curling his fingers up to reach the parts of her body that made her burn with desire. With his other hand, he let go of her leg and reached over and placed his palm firmly on her pelvis, positioning his hand in such a way that he could stroke her clit with this thumb.

Jo moaned, a strangled sort of sound, her hips jerking harder, and Alex did it again — stroking over her clit and curling his fingers deep inside her at the same time. He marveled at the obscene sounds from her mouth and her pussy. They were everything, but he wanted more.

Finally, he added a third finger inside of her and pressed down harder on her clit, and there it was. Jo moaned, and then she cried out, her back arching as her muscles clamped around Alex’s fingers inside her, “Oh my God… Alex...Alex! Ah!”

Alex continued thrusting his fingers in and out of Jo as she rode her climax. He watched as her body shuddered and as she was reduced to a series of whimpers. When Jo finally came back down from her high, Alex removed his fingers. He waited as her chest heaved up and down in an attempt to restore her breathing to normal.

Jo looked up and locked eyes with Alex. He stared at her intensely as he reached his hand back down to collect the wetness between her thighs. Jo let out a few soft whimpers at his touch. Jo felt her heart rate pick up as she watched him bring his hand out from between her legs and toy with the slick juices coating his fingers.

A mischievous smirk made its way onto Alex’s face. Alex brought his hand to his lips. He groaned as he sucked every drop of Jo’s release off his fingers slowly, trying to savor the taste of her. It took everything within him not to lean forward, bury his face between her thighs, and fuck her with his tongue so that he could taste her from the source.

Instead, Alex bent down and pressed a light kiss on her mound—causing her hips to buck up—before standing up. He looked at Jo with a shit-eating grin, “Feel better?”

Jo was struggling to come up with words as her body still trembled with the remnants of her climax. She nodded lamely and breathed out shakily, “Yeah.”

“Great,” Alex’s grin increased as he walked towards the door. “Well, glad I could be of service. I’d stick around but I’ve got a surgery scheduled for 7am tomorrow. Goodnight.”

Jo’s jaw dropped in shock at Alex’s casual exit. She took a moment to process what had just occurred and found herself growing aroused at the thought of it. She’d forgotten just how well Alex knew her body. She’d forgotten how good it could feel with him. She’d forgotten what it was like to crave him so badly that she felt she might combust. She didn’t know what this meant, but the one thing Jo knew for sure though, was that she was completely and utterly screwed.

——————

-When you're young, you just run-

-But you come back to what you need-

17 Weeks  

It had been a week since Alex had… assisted Jo. And ever since that day, Alex or more specifically, Alex’s fingers were just about the only thing Jo could think about. Her body thrummed with desire and frustration whenever the thought popped into her mind—which was often.

She’d blame it on the pregnancy hormones; making her crave sex, not sex with Alex. But after days of trying to satisfy her own needs and being unable to excite herself at the thought of another man, Jo realized that it wasn’t sex she wanted. What she wanted was sex with Alex. Lots of hot, dirty, delicious sex.

She wished the ground would swallow her whole to be completely honest. Not because she was embarrassed. No, Jo had never once felt embarrassed about desiring Alex. There was no need to be embarrassed, especially when she knew the desire was reciprocated. The reason she wished the ground would swallow her whole was because the little piece of shit—Alex—knew full well exactly the effect he had on her and he was doing absolutely nothing about it.

Well, absolutely nothing wasn’t entirely true. Alex had noticed Jo’s desire practically seeping out of her pores and had started taking every opportunity he could to be a damn tease. He’d brush his fingers against her at home, he’d flex the muscles in his arms and hands. He knew what the hell he was doing to her and would follow each display of teasing with a proud glint in his eye.

Today though, the situation seemed more charged than before. Today, Jo was stuck in an OR with Alex. One of her placenta previa patients had been experiencing some concerning pain for the past week. After various testing, Jo decided that delivering the fetus as soon as possible was the best course of action for everyone’s safety. Being that the mother was only thirty weeks into her pregnancy and the baby had been diagnosed with a heart defect in-utero, Jo knew that she had to have a peds surgeon ready to treat the child as soon as possible. She’d hoped for Arizona, but well, you don’t always get what you hope for.

That’s how she found herself standing over Alex’s shoulder in the NICU as he worked on the premature child. The mother had fared well and all but demanded that Jo go up to the NICU to personally evaluate the baby. So there she was, watching Alex’s large hands practically engulf the preemie as he held the little boy closely and adjusted some of the wiring.

I'm going to hell. Jo thought to herself. There is a sick baby and all I can think about is how big Alex’s hands are. Jo gulped quietly as Alex’s fingers twitched slightly. Yup, definitely going to hell.

After seeing that the baby was fine and taking a few pictures, Jo hurried back to her patient’s hospital room, “Hi Brenda. Little Gideon is doing great. Doctor Karev is there monitoring him, but it seems as though he is stable. I took you some pictures if you’d like to see.”

“Yes! Thank you,” Brenda answered teary-eyed. “I wish I could hold him.”

“You’ll be able to soon,” Jo comforted. “And trust me when I tell you, he’s in the best hands.”

“You understand, my worry, I mean? On top of it all, I’m doing this all alone,” Brenda motioned to Jo’s stomach. “How far along are you?”

“Seventeen weeks,” Jo replied. “And yes, I do understand. I’m also doing this alone. Just a little over a month and a half ago I had a scare myself. I started bleeding more than normal. But do you know who I was with when it happened and who helped me? Doctor Karev. And if my baby or I  were ever in any danger, he’s the first person I’d ask for. He’s the first person I’d trust to take care of us.”

“He’s good right? And I don’t just mean a good doctor. He’d obviously have to be a good doctor to work here. I guess what I want to know is, is he a good person?” Brenda leaned forward.

Jo chuckled at the woman’s question, “Yes. Alex is one of the best people I know.”

“Okay, okay, I think I feel a little better now,” Brenda nodded her head. Brenda looked lost in thought before she blushed lightly. “He’s really hot isn’t he? Dr. Karev? And this whole gig with the babies doesn't hurt him either. Please tell me you’ve hit that.”

“Brenda!” Jo laughed along with her patient.

“Sorry, you don’t have to answer that,” Brenda smiled bashfully. “I just… Well, if I worked with that every day, I would’ve jumped him a long time ago.”

“No, it’s okay,” Jo shook her head in amusement. “I know this is unprofessional since I’m your doctor, but for your information, I have hit that before.”

Brenda gasped in excitement, “Really? When? How was it? Did it happen more than once?”

“It was fantastic,” Jo sighed as her mind became distracted with thoughts of she and Alex’s past hookups in this very hospital. “It was years ago. And yes, it happened more than once. It happened quite a few times.”

“I'm sorry. You are my doctor and I’m asking you about your sex life and you’re four months pregnant which I know means that you are really… frustrated right now and I am definitely not helping you,” Brenda winced apologetically.

“Definitely not helping me,” Jo huffed and shook her head, trying to get the horribly obscene thoughts out of her brain. “Anyway, Gideon is okay and Dr. Karev is taking great care of him. If we’re lucky, he won’t need to go into surgery to correct his heart until he gets a little stronger.”

“Thank you, Dr. Wilson,” Brenda called out as Jo walked over to the door. “Oh and Dr. Wilson!” Jo turned to face Brenda who had a bright smile on her face. “You should hit that again.”

Jo rolled her eyes, “I’ll think about it.”

The rest of the day, Jo was practically itching to get home. She checked the schedule on the board and saw that Alex would be home an hour after her and Cristina was on call tonight. As soon as her shift was over, she rushed to her car and drove quickly to the house. Immediately upon arriving, Jo went upstairs to the bathroom to shower and shave. On the drive home, Jo had resolved her decision to finally ask Alex for the one thing she’d been craving more than anything. So now, she was sitting on the side of the tub attempting to shave—a task she had been severely neglecting ever since her bump appeared.

Hearing Alex’s car pull up in the driveway, Jo toweled off quickly, throwing on an oversized t-shirt and hurrying down the stairs. She sat on a chair beside the staircase waiting for Alex to walk inside. Jo had been fidgeting and bouncing her leg anxiously when the door opened to reveal a confused Alex.

Jo jumped up from the chair, “We have the house to ourselves.”

“What?” Alex’s face scrunched up in question.

“We have the house to ourselves,” Jo repeated. “But I want you to know, that just because I’m about to jump into bed with you does not mean I’m some pregnant slut who has no morals. Because I do have morals. I have lots of them. But I’m also very, very—”

“No more talking,” Alex shushed her.

“Huh?”

Alex ran his hands down her body’s curves to grab her thighs, wrapping her legs around his waist and picking her up effortlessly, gaining a startled gasp from the woman in his arms.

“Yes! Oh, thank God!”

He carried her up the stairs and into her room. The delicious rub of her body against he drew a groan from the back of his throat. In retaliation, he grazed a hand back up her body, slipping under her shirt and over the curve of her waist, groaning as he realized that she was completely bare underneath.

Impatient as ever, Jo pulled back from the kiss and yanked her shirt over her head. Alex pressed her against the nearest wall and reverently ran a hand over the newly exposed skin. Her breathing was labored. While he was distracted, Jo moved on to his shirt. Her hands lingered on his muscles as she slowly exposed each one. Her thighs clenched tighter to hold herself up as Alex raised his arms and he pressed his pelvis into hers. The movement earned him a stuttered gasp so he did it again.

Jo tossed his shirt carelessly to some lost corner of the room. Their lips met again in a desperate kiss, skin pressed to skin. Alex’s hand slid up her back, holding her to him. As he pulled them from the wall and moved to the bed, his other hand found its way to her breast and got his first handful of cleavage.

He thumbed her nipple. Jo whined and Alex repeated the motion as he lowered her to the bed. His mouth left hers and pressed more kisses across her jaw, down her neck, and paused at the juncture with her shoulder when she moaned and thrusted against him in response. Her fingers speared into his hair to hold him in place. The other hand guided his back to her breast to squeeze.

Her hand then returned to run down his chest. Her nails trailed over his nipples and she nipped his neck as her fingers reached the button of his jeans. With one motion, she opened his pants and slipped her hand inside his pants to cup him without anything in between them.

Alex sifted down the bed, pressing kisses down her body. He dragged his lips across her skin, kissing every inch of skin until he reached the juncture between her legs.  

“Alex,” Jo whined when he paused.

Alex chuckled and pressed a conciliatory kiss to her hip bone. He settled back between her legs, kissing along the soft, exposed skin of her thighs. Jo’s hands curled into his hair and tried to direct him to her center faster. He laughed against her skin and bit her thigh in retaliation.

“God,” Alex breathed out, dangerously close to her hot center. “I’ve been thinking about this all damn week.”

“So have I,” Jo replied shakily.

Alex’s hands ran up and down her thighs as he pressed kisses along her bump and pelvis, “You’re so beautiful.”

“Alex, I swear to God, if you don’t—” She never got to finish her threat, cut off when his mouth found her pussy. “Oh, fuck, Alex!”

He used his fingers to spread her open as he lapped at her entrance, pressed into her, taking his cues from the way her hands in his hair, the sounds she made, and the movement of her hips. His tongue swirled up to her clit, varying speed and strength. He started with a single finger, slipping it into her wet warmth with ease. At her encouragement, he added a second. After a few sample thrusts, he crooked his fingers to find the spongy flesh that made her keen.

Alex groaned against her, adding a third finger. Jo tensed under him as he built her right up to the ledge and then stopped. Jo whined as he distanced himself, watching in fascination as her pussy clenched around nothing. His thumb grazed her labia and Jo jerked at the sensation.

“Alex,” Her plea conveyed in a single word.

He let his thumb strum her labia again, “What do you want, Jo?” He rubbed his cock against the bed, hoping the friction will relieve some of the building tension. He lightly stroked her again. “You’re going to have to be specific.”

“Make me come.”

“More specific,” Alex teased as he leaned forward and let his breath exhale across her skin.

Emboldened by Alex’s urging, Jo huffed at him, “Make me come with your mouth. Use your fingers until I gush around you, and then fuck me until I come again.”

Alex’s attention flew directly on her clit, teasing it with his tongue as he thrust three fingers in and out, pressing against that spot that made her see stars. Jo dragged his other hand up to clench around her breast as she chanted, “Yes, yes, oh, God, Alex, there, there, fuck, Alex, I’m coming!”

She shuddered under him, coming with a spasm around his fingers. He pulled his fingers out and sat up. He yanked her by the thighs toward him. He lifted her legs up, wrapped them around his waist, and thrust himself deep into her, groaning as he felt her still clenching around him.

The moment he was inside her, it was like a once black and white world exploding with color. It was electrifying and consuming, to the point that neither Jo or Alex really dared to move out of fear of ruining this perfectly good moment. This feeling that neither one of them had experienced since the last time they were joined this way over three and a half years ago.

Jo’s thighs clenched to hold her in place and Alex leaned forward. Her insides fluttered as Alex slid both hands under her and lifted Jo so she hovered over him, gravity forcing her down on his cock. With each thrust, she rocked against him, rubbing against all of him. She whimpered and wrapped her arms around his shoulders.

Alex turned so he could sit on the edge of the bed as Jo rode him, desperate and needy. His hand slipped between them to rub against her clit as he got close to orgasm. Jo grabbed his face and sealed her lips to his in a messy kiss that tasted like her, as she climaxed again and he fell over the edge with her.

They both collapsed back against the bed, sweaty and breathless. Alex ran a hand up over her back in soothing strokes as Jo tried to catch her breath. He wasn’t not doing so hot on the breathing himself, but the softness of her skin was soothing, as is the scent of her that surrounds them along with the musty aroma of sex.

They were silent as they came back down from their highs. Neither one brave enough to voice their thoughts even though they both had the same exact thing running through their brains: holy crap.

Not because it was bad. Definitely not because it was bad. It was because it was good. Really good. Too good. It was too good, too much, too overwhelming, too intimate. It wasn’t the kind of sex you had with a one night stand or even a friend. No, this was the kind of sex you had with the person who knew you better than anyone. This was the kind of sex you had with a lover.

But Jo and Alex wouldn’t admit that. No, admitting something as cataclysmic as that would complicate things. It would put a strain on the friendship that they were still trying to carefully rebuild. So, Jo filed the feelings she was feeling away in her brain as a result of the pregnancy hormones, while Alex blamed their history and unfinished business on the sudden onset of his desire for more than this.

There wasn’t any room for feelings. Especially when neither one of them wanted to give this up. They could do it. They could separate the emotion from the action. They could be sex friends. Yes, that’s exactly what they would be: sex friends.

——————

-This love is good-

-This love is bad-

-This love is alive back from the dead, oh, oh, oh-

21 Weeks

“Hey, you okay?”

Jo looked up from her spot on her bed to see Alex standing in the doorway, arms crossed and a concerned expression on his face. She shook her head slightly, “Not really. I’m sad.”

“Well, you know I wouldn’t mind cheering you up,” Alex wiggled his eyebrows suggestively as he walked closer to the bed. “Take your mind off things for a while. I could do that thing with my tongue that you really like.”

Jo chuckled, “No, but thanks for the offer. I could really use a friend, though.”

Alex removed his shoes and laid down beside her, propping himself up on his elbow as she turned on her side to face him. Alex reached to hold her hand, “What’s going on?”

“I felt the baby kick for the first time today,” Jo’s lips twitched into a small smile. “I’ve felt her flutter before but today was the first time I actually felt her kick. She’s kicking right now if you want to feel.”

Jo positioned Alex’s hand over her belly and waited for her daughter to kick again. Seconds later, Alex was  met with a strong kick against his hand. Alex gasped excitedly and leaned down towards Jo’s stomach, “Hey baby girl Wilson. You’ve got a strong set of legs right there.”

Jo’s eyes widened as she felt another series of strong kicks, “She likes you.”

“She does, doesn’t she?” Alex turned his attention back to the spot where the kicks were coming from. “Like mother, like daughter I guess.” Alex felt a slap on his head. “Hey! It’s the truth. Anyway, be good for your momma okay? No more scares like the ones you gave us a couple months ago. And try not press on her bladder too much. Just focus on growing and getting strong. Uncle Alex can’t wait to meet you.”

Jo felt a couple tears slip down her cheeks. She was still getting used to seeing Alex like this. Sure, even before he’d always been sweet and kind to her, but this softness was definitely something she felt privileged to see. Before, he’d been more cocky and callous, arrogant and closed-off. However, peds had changed him. He lived and breathed for the children he took care of. Jo could see that clear as day. And there wasn’t one moment that went by where she didn’t feel immensely grateful for the opportunity to know this side of him as well.

Alex straightened and laid back down on the bed next to Jo, bringing her close. He ran his hand along her back and spoke, “You gonna tell me why you’re sad?”

“I just…” Jo sighed. “Feeling her kick today just made everything real. I’m having a baby and I’m going to be raising her alone.” She paused and her eyes watered. “I felt her kick today and my first instinct was to call Jason. I don’t even know why. I kind of hate him if I’m being honest. He’s one of the worst guys I’ve ever been with and that’s saying something because I have been known to have... questionable taste in men. But I felt her kick and I just—I couldn’t stop thinking about how she will never know her father. She’ll never have a father to take her to daddy-daughter dances, or protect her from the monsters under her bed, or intimidate all of her boyfriends. She’ll never have a father that shows her an example of how she should expect to be treated and respected and cared for and loved. All she’ll have is me.” Jo sniffled and wiped a straying tear. “I think back to my own childhood and think of the rejection I felt. The rejection I still feel. I never want her to feel that. But sometimes, I’m afraid I won’t be enough. That even with all my love and support, she’ll still feel like something—or someone is missing and that she’ll blame herself for that.”

“When I was a kid, all I wanted was for someone to care. It didn't matter who, just that they cared," Alex started. "My mom was sick, so most of the time, l was taking care of her and my siblings. And my dad, well let's just say that even when he was around, he might as well not have been. For a lot of time I resented him, still do if I'm being honest. But that's because even though my mom was supposed to be the one in charge, I was the single parent." Alex placed his hand on Jo's stomach again and was rewarded with another set of kicks. "This little girl is never going to know anything but love and care. She already has it so different than you or I ever had it. She’s got people in her corner and she hasn’t even been born. You may be a single mom, but that doesn't mean your family is any less whole. You can't control now she'll feel, but don't ever think that you aren't already a good enough mother."

“How the hell do you always know exactly what to say?” Jo wiped a few tears off her cheeks.

“Guess I’m just fluent in Jo Wilson,” Alex shrugged, a smile on his face.

“I missed this,” Jo whispered after a few more minutes. “All those years I was gone? I missed just talking to you and hugging you and laying down next to you. And now that I’m here and you’re here, I don’t ever want to leave again. I know I’d be okay if I moved, but I would never truly be happy. I know that now more than ever. I’d miss you too much.”

“I’d miss you too,” Alex pressed a kiss on her forehead. “But it’s a good thing I don’t plan on going anywhere anytime soon, because I plan on seeing this little girl grow up. Which reminds me of something actually.”

Alex reached to grab a bag he’d set down on the foot of the bed when he’d laid down next to Jo. He opened it and took out a green onesie that said, “ My uncle is the coolest.” He showed it Jo with a big smile on his face, “Ta da. Figured I’d buy this for her now, since I already know she’s going to prefer me to everyone else.”

“Oh my god, Alex,” Jo’s hand flew up to her mouth and she let out a laugh. “I love it. This is her first onesie.”

“Really?” Alex raised his eyebrows. “Huh, well, everything else is just going to have to try to measure up to the awesomeness of this one.”

“Shut up,” Jo grinned and rolled her eyes. “I really do love it. But why do I have a feeling that she’s actually going to like you more than she likes me?”

“What can I say? The Wilson ladies love me,” Alex smirked.

“We sure do.”

——————

-This love left a permanent mark-

-This love is glowing in the dark, oh, oh, oh-

24 Weeks

“What’s up with you?” Meredith asked as she peered through the doorway of the nursery Alex was currently painting. “Are you surprising Jo with a nursery? Is this why you called me?”

“She’s been stressed and I wanted to do something nice for her and the baby,” Alex explained as he continued to coat the walls with the light gray paint. “I read in one of those baby books that the parents left lying around in the NICU that light gray walls are supposed to calm babies and help them sleep through the night so I decided on this with teal, white, and light pink accents.”

Meredith’s jaw dropped in shock, “You decided on a paint scheme?”

“Well, I asked Kepner and Robbins for help,” Alex looked over his shoulder at his friend. “They picked out the colors and gave me pictures to go off of. I can’t paint it all by myself though, so I called you. I would’ve asked Cristina, but you know Yang isn’t going to spend her day off painting a nursery. Plus, she decided to go to that conference in Portland this weekend. Besides, you’ve got a daughter so I figured you’d know what little girls like better.”

“Alex,” Meredith sighed. “Why are you doing this? Are you trying to win her back? Because it doesn’t really work like that.”

“No, no, this has nothing to do with winning her back,” Alex waved his hand in protest. “Well, I mean it would be nice if I could win her back, but that’s not why I’m doing this.” Alex paused as he figured out what he was trying to say. “I’m just trying to be a good friend… all I can think about every time I see her, glowing and smiling as she holds her belly, is how much I screwed up. I screwed up so bad all those years ago and now she’s having another man’s baby.” Alex looked down at his hands. “All I’ve ever wanted is to be that man. To be beside her throughout the whole process, to get excited and plan for what’s to come, to cry as I hold our child in my arms for the first time. But I was stupid and I practically ripped her heart out, and now she’s too afraid to go any further with me. Because it’s not just her anymore. She’s got a daughter to think about now. Her daughter will always come first. And that’s how it should be. I just… I wish Jo was having our daughter.”

Meredith placed a hand on Alex’s shoulder, “You really never stopped loving her.”

“Nope,” Alex let out a breath. “And this… arrangement or whatever we have going on is great. Really. It’s fun and it feels like us. But I want so much more, Mer. I want everything with her and I can’t have everything because I was a dumbass.”

“Give her time,” Meredith ran a comforting hand between his shoulder blades. “She loves you. I know that much. Don’t try too hard. Just keep being Alex, and one day hopefully she’ll want more. Now, give me a paint brush so I can get started on the accent wall. We don't need you messing up the lines and smudging the paint."

Alex rolled his eyes and handed Meredith a brush, "Shut up and get to work."

Five hours and a few arguments later, Alex and Meredith were putting the finishing touches on the new nursery as they waited for Jo's arrival.

"Do you think she'll like it?" Alex fidgeted nervously as he stared at the completed space. "You don't think it's too much right?"

"Alex, calm down," Meredith chuckled. "She's going to love it."

"You think? You don't think she'll be upset that I did it all without her?"

"Are you kidding?" Meredith laughed. "Jo loves surprises. She's also six months pregnant and is a blubbering emotional, hormonal mess half the time. She's going to cry happy tears when she realizes there is one less thing on her plate. As a fellow pregnant, hormonal lady, I think this just might get you laid."

“Shut up,” Alex finally let out a laugh that settled his nerves. “Okay, get out of here. She’s gonna be here in a few minutes and see your car in the driveway.”

“Okay, okay, I’m leaving,” Meredith grabbed her things and headed towards the front door. She was about to step outside when she turned to look at her friend. “Alex.”

Alex looked at Meredith expectantly, “What is it?”

“I’m proud of you,” Meredith said, a playful smile on her face. “You’re acting very grown up.”

Alex could feel the blush make its way on his face as his lips curled into a bashful grin, “Stop it.”

“Let me know how it goes!”

Alex watched Meredith leave and moved to sit on the couch. He waited anxiously for Jo to arrive home. He jumped up when he saw her car finally make its way up the driveway. Alex was waiting by the door when she walked in, “Hey.”

“Hi,” Jo looked at him strangely. “What’s going on with you?”

“I have something to show you. A surprise,” Alex breathed out.

“A surprise?” Jo raised an eyebrow. “Ooh! Is it that ice cream that I’ve been craving all week?”

“No, it’s not ice cream,” Alex shook his head in amusement. “It’s upstairs.”

“Okay…” Jo observed him for a moment. “Well then, lead the way.”

Jo followed Alex closely as he guided her up the stairs to the bedroom that had been sitting empty for the past few months. Alex placed his hand on the doorknob, “So, I did something and I don’t know… maybe you’ll love it, maybe you’ll hate it. Anyway, I worked hard on it and I hope that it’s everything you could’ve dreamed of.”

Jo gasped as Alex opened the door to the guest room—now nursery. She stepped in and spent the next few minutes taking it all in. Tears collected in her eyes as she walked around the room and traced her hands along the edge of the walls, the crib, the rocking chair, the changing table, the twin bed in the corner for her to use during the first weeks after the baby was born, and the various other pieces that Alex had purchased in an effort to prepare the room.

“You did this all by yourself?” Jo asked after a few minutes of just staring at all his hard work in awe.

“It was my idea, but I had some help,” Alex shuffled his feet awkwardly. “Kepner and Robbins helped me pick the color scheme, Cristina bought the rocking chair, Hunt gave me the day off, Meredith helped me paint and put the furniture together. It was a team effort.”

Jo lurched forward and wrapped her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly, “Thank you.” Jo whispered tenderly and wiped a couple tears. “I can’t believe you do this for me. For us.” Jo placed a hand on her swollen stomach. “No one has ever done anything like this for me before.”

“I want you guys to have everything,” Alex’s flit back and forth between Jo’s mouth and eyes. “You deserve all this and more. Both of you do. I swear, as long as I’m around, my goddaughter is never going to want for anything. Because between you and me, she’s gonna be spoiled rotten.”

Jo was about to say something when they were interrupted by the doorbell. Alex straightened and walked downstairs, “I’ll get it. Why don’t you take a shower and relax? I’ll order takeout from that restaurant down the street while you get comfortable.”

Jo nodded quietly and made her way to the bathroom to get showered. For weeks now, Jo had been fighting with herself and her feelings towards Alex. Her resolve was slowly wearing down and in truth, it had been since the moment she’d arrived back in Seattle. Everything within her burned for Alex. And the sex arrangement they’d had going on for the past two months certainly did not help matters. Because as much as Jo tried to convince herself that it had to be the hormones making her feel this way, it was never just sex with Alex.

It had always been so much more—at least on her part. Every time she kissed him, every time she touched him, every time she laid in bed beside him, waiting until he fell asleep so she could leave, Jo found herself getting lost in the daydreams, thinking about what life would be life if she were just a little braver and gave into what her heart wanted more than anything.

Because it was true. She wanted Alex and a life with Alex more than anything. But Jo was afraid to allow herself to fall for him completely again because she knew how hard it was the last time when it ended. The last time hurt like hell. The last time, she ended up leaving Seattle. The last time, she lost a part of herself. The fear of things ending like they did the last time was almost always enough to reel her back in and sway her to decide against going any further with the man she was sure was the love of her life. This time though, she wasn’t so sure it would be enough.

Finishing her shower and burying those thoughts in the back of her mind, Jo toweled off and put on a pair of sweatpants and one of the old tshirts she’d stolen from Alex when her belly outgrew hers. She threw her damp hair into a half-hazard braid and made her way down the hall. Pausing in the doorway of the new nursery, Jo smiled again. Not seeing Alex inside, she walked out into the hallway and called out his name.

“Alex?”

“In here.”

Jo turned down the hall toward his bedroom, hearing the shuffling of a couple items as she neared the door, “Hey, who was that at the door earlier?”

Alex looked over his shoulder, “Oh it was the delivery truck. This came in a little late, so I’m setting it up now.”

Finally setting her gaze on what he was working on, Jo sucked in a surprised gasp. There in front of her very eyes, Alex was setting up the bassinet in his room.

Unsure of the meaning of his actions, Jo spoke, “What’s this?”

“Oh, I—uh, I bought it so I could help you when the baby is here. You know, in case you ever want to take a break or just need a goodnight’s sleep, I can help with the baby too,” Alex shrugged, looking up at her as if the words that he’d just spoken so nonchalantly were of little importance. “It’s a pretty cool bassinet too. One of the nurses in peds recommended it to me. You know Marissa? The one with five kids? She told me that—”

Alex’s voice faded into the background as Jo became lost in thought. This can’t be real. Guys don’t just do these things for their friends. Jo felt herself become increasingly emotional as she processed the significance of Alex’s actions. He’s all in with me. He’s all in with this baby that’s not even his. He’s here and he hasn’t left and he’s not going to leave because he loves me. That may have been the most startling realization. It really shouldn’t have been that surprising that Alex had never stopped loving her, not for one moment. But for some reason, Jo felt her heart swell at the knowledge that all this time, he’d just been waiting patiently for her to let him know when she was ready for more.

Realizing that Alex was still speaking, Jo looked back up at his stupid, perfect, beautiful face and opened her mouth to try express the rush of emotions that had just hit her like a thousand bricks. Rendered speechless, Jo did what she knew best. She showed him.

Jo interrupted Alex’s nervous rambling by placing both hands on his face and pressing her head against his own. She took a deep breath and stared deeply into Alex’s confused eyes. Mustering up what little courage she had left, Jo leaned forward and kissed him.

Despite his initial surprise, Alex reciprocated quickly. His arms wrapped around her body quickly, pulling her to him as closely as he could possibly get. Sure, they’d kissed before, but this was different. This kiss wasn’t just a result of built up sexual tension or lust. This kiss was pure love, passion, devotion, and emotion all rolled up into one. He was practically thrumming with awe at the sensation and demonstrated every ounce of his love for her in that kiss as he could.

When they finally pulled away, Alex looked at her with a puzzled expression on his face. He watched as Jo opened and closed her mouth dumbly a few times before interjecting, “You okay there? You look a little speechless. I mean, I know I'm a great kisser but it’s nice to get that validation every once in a while.” Alex smirked as his little quip eased the tension between them, immediately making Jo feel more comfortable.

“Alex,” Jo breathed out a laugh and felt tears prickle at her eyes. “Why would you do all of this for me?”

“Why wouldn’t I?”

Jo looked at the sincerity in his eyes and left her own pool with water, “You didn’t have to.”

“I know,” Alex nodded. “I wanted to. Because… I love you, Jo. You know that.”

“I don’t deserve it,” Jo wiped a tear that had made its way down her cheek.

“Of course you do,” Alex’s hands found her stomach and rested comfortably on her bump. “You and this baby deserve all the love in the world. There isn’t anything you could do that would make me want to stop loving you.”

Jo let out a sob, “There’s something I need to tell you. Something that I’ve been wanting to say for months now, but I was never brave enough to say it. I want to be brave now.”

“You know that you can tell me anything,” Alex’s eyes bored into hers intensely.

“Okay… I’m, uh… I𑁋” Jo stuttered awkwardly.

“I don’t hear anything,” Alex chuckled as Jo struggled to find the words.

“Shut up!” Jo looked at him exasperatedly. “I’m freaking out enough as it is.”

“Okay, but𑁋”

“I’m serious,” Jo pouted, prompting Alex to laugh.

“Fine,” Alex schooled his expression and waited until she found her voice again.

“I love you,” Jo confessed, heart racing wildly inside her chest. “I’m in love with you, Alex. I’ve been in love with you ever since that first night when you kissed me in the rain outside Joe’s bar after we passed our intern exams. I’ve loved you since then and I haven’t stopped loving you. Yes, you hurt me more than anyone ever has, but you’ve also loved me more than anyone I’ve ever known. And it's not just a fleeting love, it's pure love. It’s a true love. It’s all the things I had always dreamed of as a little girl. I won’t pretend it’s been easy loving you, because loving you isn’t something I just fell into. It was a choice I made, a choice I continue to make every single day because loving you comes to me as natural as breathing. I can’t seem to let go of our past promises and dreams, so I want the chance to realize our forever. And I want to try, but I mean, actually try this time. No more messing around or pretending like we're content with just being friends. I want more with you Alex. All I know is I want you just because you’re you and we’re us. I want everything with you.”

Alex’s face soon mirrored Jo’s as tears began to fall from his eyes. He pressed their foreheads together, noses brushing against each other. He closed his eyes, “I love you. I love you. I love you.” Alex laughed joyfully. “I love you so much that sometimes I have to remind myself to breathe. Throughout my life I’ve been with a lot of nobodies, but you’re not a nobody. You’re my person. You’re the love of my life. And yeah, I probably sound like the stupidest, cheesiest, guy on the face of the earth right now, but I don’t care. I don’t care if I look like a fool. I’ll look like the biggest idiot on the planet if it meant that you’d finally understand how much I love you. How much I want you. How much I need you. I need you, Jo and I don’t ever want to be without you.”

Despite the tears currently running down her face, Jo smiled shyly, “So, is this what I think it is? Does this mean we’re trying?”

“Hell yes,” Alex kissed her soundly. “It’s you and me against the world from now on.”

They were interrupted by a round of kicks against their palms, causing the two of them to laugh. Alex knelt down in front of Jo’s bump, “I’m sorry, Baby Wilson. What I meant was me, your mom and you against the world.”

Alex’s response to Jo’s belly garnered another kick. Jo rolled her eyes, “Oh gosh. She really does like you better than she likes me.”

“She’s just jealous,” Alex smirked. “I have that effect on the ladies.”

Jo laughed, “Shut up.”

“Make me,” Alex challenged, a mischievous glint in his eye.

“You’re gonna regret having said that,” Jo warned as she pushed him over to the bed.

“You know, I don’t think I will.”

-These hands had to let it go free, and-

-This love came back to me, oh, oh, oh-

Were you expecting any of what just happened? Lol let me know what you thought and anything you like to see. Also, send me baby name suggestions!

[1962dude420-blog]

Today we remember the passing of James Garner who Died: July 19, 2014  in Los Angeles, California

Garner was born James Scott Bumgarner on April 7, 1928 in Denver, Oklahoma (now a part of Norman, Oklahoma). His parents were Weldon Warren Bumgarner, a widower, and Mildred Scott (Meek), who died five years after his birth. His older brothers were Jack Garner (1926–2011) and Charles Bumgarner (1924-1984), a school administrator. His family was Methodist. After their mother's death, Garner and his brothers were sent to live with relatives. Garner was reunited with his family in 1934, when Weldon remarried.

Garner's father remarried several times. Garner came to hate one of his stepmothers, Wilma, who beat all three boys (especially him). He said that his stepmother also punished him by forcing him to wear a dress in public. When he was 14 years old, he fought with her, knocking her down and choking her to keep her from killing him in retaliation. She left the family and never returned. His brother Jack later commented, "She was a damn no-good woman". Garner's last stepmother was Grace, whom he said he loved and called "Mama Grace", and felt that she was more of a mother to him than anyone else had been.

After the war, Garner joined his father in Los Angeles and enrolled at Hollywood High School, where he was voted the most popular student. A high school gym teacher recommended him for a job modeling Jantzen bathing suits. It paid well ($25 an hour), but in his first interview for the Archives of American Television, he said he hated modeling; he soon quit and returned to Norman. He played football and basketball at Norman High School, and competed on the track and golf teams. However, he dropped out in his senior year. In a 1976 Good Housekeeping magazine interview, he admitted, "I was a terrible student and I never actually graduated from high school, but I got my diploma in the Army."

Shortly after his father's marriage to Wilma broke up, his father moved to Los Angeles, leaving Garner and his brothers in Norman. After working at several jobs he disliked, Garner worked as a merchant mariner in the United States Merchant Marine at age 16 near the end of World War II. He liked the work and his shipmates, but he suffered from chronic seasickness.

Garner enlisted in the California Army National Guard, serving his first 7 months in California. He then went to Korea for 14 months, as a rifleman in the 5th Regimental Combat Team during the Korean War, then part of the 24th Infantry Division. He was wounded twice, first in the face and hand by shrapnel from a mortar round, and the second time in the buttocks from friendly fire from U.S. fighter jets as he dived into a foxhole. Garner received the Purple Heart in Korea for the first wound. He qualified for a second Purple Heart (eligibility requirement: "As the result of friendly fire while actively engaging the enemy"), but he did not actually receive it until 1983, 32 years after the event.

In 1954, Paul Gregory, a friend whom Garner had met while attending Hollywood High School, persuaded Garner to take a nonspeaking role in the Broadway production of The Caine Mutiny Court-Martial, where he was able to study Henry Fonda night after night. During the week of Garner's death, TCM broadcast most of his movies, introduced by Robert Osborne, who said that Fonda's gentle, sincere persona rubbed off on Garner, greatly to Garner's benefit.

Garner subsequently moved to television commercials and eventually to television roles. In 1955, Garner was considered for the lead role in the Western series Cheyenne, but that role went to Clint Walker because the casting director could not reach Garner in time (according to Garner's autobiography). Garner wound up playing an Army officer in the 1955 Cheyenne pilot titled "Mountain Fortress." His first film appearances were in The Girl He Left Behind and Toward the Unknown in 1956.

In 1957, he had a supporting role in the TV anthology series episode on Conflict entitled "Man from 1997," portraying Maureen (Gloria Talbott)'s brother "Red"; the show stars Jacques Sernas as Johnny Vlakos and Charlie Ruggles as elderly Mr. Boyne, a librarian from 1997, and involved a 1997 Almanac that was mistakenly left in the past by Boyne and found by Johnny in a bookstore. The series' producer Roy Huggins noted in his Archive of American Television interview that he subsequently cast Garner as the lead in Maverick due to his comedic facial expressions while playing scenes in "Man from 1997" that were not originally written to be comical. He changed his last name from Bumgarner to Garner after the studio had credited him as "James Garner" without permission. He then legally changed it upon the birth of his first child, when he decided she had too many names.

Nominated for 15 Emmy Awards during his television career, Garner received the award in 1977 as Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series (The Rockford Files) and in 1987 as executive producer of Promise. For his contribution to the film and television industry, Garner received a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

In 1990, he was inducted into the Western Performers Hall of Fame at the National Cowboy & Western Heritage Museum in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. He was also inducted into the Television Hall of Fame that same year. In February 2005, he received the Screen Actors Guild's Lifetime Achievement Award. He was also nominated for Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Supporting Role that year, for The Notebook. When Morgan Freeman won that prize for his work in Million Dollar Baby, Freeman led the audience in a sing-along of the original Maverick theme song, written by David Buttolph and Paul Francis Webster.

Garner was a strong Democratic Party supporter. From 1982, Garner gave at least $29,000 to Federal campaigns, of which over $24,000 was to Democratic Party candidates, including Dennis Kucinich (for Congress in 2002), Dick Gephardt, John Kerry, Barbara Boxer, and various Democratic committees and groups.

On August 28, 1963, Garner was one of several celebrities to join Martin Luther King Jr. in the "March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom". In his autobiography, Garner recalled sitting in the third row listening to King's "I Have a Dream" speech.

For his role in the 1985 CBS miniseries Space, the character's party affiliation was changed from Republican as in the book to reflect Garner's personal views. Garner said, "My wife would leave me if I played a Republican."

There was an effort by California Democratic party leaders, led by state Senator Herschel Rosenthal, to persuade Garner to seek the Democratic nomination for Governor of California in the 1990 election. However, future United States Senator and former San Francisco Mayor Dianne Feinstein received the nomination instead, losing to Republican Pete Wilson in the election

Garner was married to Lois Josephine Fleischman Clarke, whom he met at a party in 1956. They married 14 days later on August 17, 1956. "We went to dinner every night for 14 nights. I was just absolutely nuts about her. I spent $77 on our honeymoon, and it about broke me." According to Garner, "Marriage is like the Army; everyone complains, but you'd be surprised at the large number of people who re-enlist." His wife was Jewish.

When Garner and Clarke married, her daughter Kim from a previous marriage was seven years old and recovering from polio. Garner had one daughter with Lois: Greta "Gigi" Garner. In an interview in Good Housekeeping with Garner, his wife, and two daughters, conducted at their home, and published in March 1976, Gigi's age was given as 18 and Kim's as 27.

In 1970, Garner and his wife briefly lived separately for three months. In late 1979, Garner again separated from his wife (around the time The Rockford Files stopped filming), splitting his time between living in Canada and "a rented house in the Valley". The two resumed living together in September 1981, and remained married for the rest of his life. Garner said that the separations were not caused by marital problems, instead stating that he simply needed to spend time alone in order to recover from the stress of acting. Garner died less than a month before their 58th wedding anniversary.

Garner's knees became a chronic problem during the filming of The Rockford Files in the 1970s, with "six or seven knee operations during that time". In 2000, he underwent knee replacement surgery for both of them.

On April 22, 1988, Garner had quintuple bypass heart surgery. Though he recovered rapidly, he was advised to stop smoking. Garner quit smoking 17 years later.

Garner underwent surgery on May 11, 2008, following a severe stroke he had suffered two days earlier. His prognosis was reported to be "very positive". Garner was a private and introverted man, according to family and friends, On July 19, 2014, police and rescue personnel were summoned to Garner's Los Angeles-area home, where they found the actor dead at the age of 86. He had suffered a "massive" heart attack caused by coronary artery disease. He had been in poor health since his stroke in 2008.

Longtime friends Tom Selleck (who worked with Garner on The Rockford Files), Sally Field (who worked with Garner in Murphy's Romance) and Clint Eastwood (who guest-starred with Garner on Maverick and starred in Space Cowboys) reflected on his death. Selleck said, "Jim was a mentor to me and a friend, and I will miss him." Field said, "My heart just broke. There are few people on this planet I have adored as much as Jimmy Garner. I cherish every moment I spent with him and relive them over and over in my head. He was a diamond." Eastwood said, "Garner opened the door for people like Steve McQueen and myself."

[luvneedsnosyt]

My Favorite Albums of May 2019

My Previous monthly lists from 2019: January, February, March, April

You can find my list of my favorite albums of 2018 here And my list of my favorite EPs of 2018 here

Best:

Ally & AJ - Sanctuary EP Genre: Pop

Proof: Church / Not Ready to Wake Up

Ari Lennox - Shae Butter Baby Genre: R&B

Proof: BMO / Broke (Feat. JID)

Barrie - Happy to Be Here Genre: Indie Pop

Proof: Dark Tropical / Clovers

BAYNK - Someone’s II Genre: Synth Pop

Proof: Settle (Feat. Sinead Harnett) / Go with U

Beast Coast (Pro Era, Flatbush Zombies & The Underachievers) - Escape From New York Genre: Hip Hop

Proof: Left Hand / Bones

B00TY - High Art EP Genre: Synth Pop / Funk / Dance

Proof: Trust Me (Feat. Kill Nigel) / Blowing Up My Phone

Carly Rae Jepsen - Dedicated Genre: Synth Pop

Proof: No Drug Like Me / Right Words Wrong Time

Charley Bliss - Young Enough Genre: Indie Rock / Alternative

Proof: Capacity / Chatroom

Denzel Curry - ZUU Genre: Hip Hop

Proof: RICKY / BIRDZ (Feat. Rick Ross)

Diplo - Higher Ground EP Genre: Electronic / House / Dance

Proof:Hold You Tight / Win Win (Feat. Tove Lo) // Bonus: Spicy (Spice Girls Cover/Rework) w/ Herve Pagez Feat. Charli XCX

Dog Blood (Skrillex & Boys Noize)  - Turn Off The Lights EP Genre: Electronic / Dance / Dubstep

Proof: BREAK LAW / TURN OFF THE LIGHTS

DUCKWRTH - THE FALLING MAN Genre: Hip Hop

Proof: FALL BACK / A WILDFIRE (Feat. Mr. Carmack & Allan Kingdom)

Elohim - BRAINDEAD EP Genre: Electronic / Synth-Pop

Proof: tv / flagpole sitta (Harvey Danger cover w/ AWOLNATION)

Emotional Oranges - The Juice, Vol. 1 Genre: R&B / Neo-Soul

Proof: Personal / Unless You’re Drowning

FRENSHIP - Vacation Genre: Synth-Pop

Proof: Remind You / Wide Open // Bonus: MI Amore / LOVE Somebody

HÆLOS - Any Random Kindness Genre: Electronic / House 

Proof: Kyoto / Empty Skies

Injury Reserve - Injury Reserve Genre: Hip Hop

Proof: Jailbreak the Tesla (Feat. Aminé) / Wax On (Feat. Freddie Gibbs)

Izzy Bizu - GLITA EP Genre: R&B / Soul

Proof: Lights On / Someone That Loves You ‘19 (w/ Chris Martin)

Jamila Woods - LEGACY! LEGACY! Genre: R&B / Neo-Soul

Proof: ZORA / BALDWIN (Feat. Nico Segal)

Kaskade - Redux 003 Genre: Electronic / Dance

Proof: Go Slow (w/ Gorgon City Feat. Roméo) / Love Me Like You Used To (Feat. Cecilia Gault)

Kishi Bashi - Omoiyari Genre: Indie Pop

Proof: Summer of ‘42 / Violin Tsunami 

Lucky Daye - Painted Genre: R&B / Soul

Proof: Concentrate / Paint It

Matinee Commune - PDA Genre: Electronic / Future Bass

Proof: Famous (Feat. Cassandra Violet) / Carried Away (Feat. Allie Crystal)

MorMor - Some Place Else EP Genre: alt-R&B / Indie Pop

Proof: Outside / Pass The Hours

NIKI - wanna take this downtown? Genre: R&B

Proof: urs / move!

Skepta - Ignorance is Bliss Genre: Hip Hop

Proof: Bullet From A Gun / No Sleep

SNBRN - Solé Genre: Electronic / House

Proof: Feel My Love / Never Let You Go

SonReal - The Aaron LP Genre: Indie Pop / Alternative / Hip Hop

Proof: Fearless / Quit

SYML - SYML Genre: Indie Pop / Alternative

Proof: Wildfire / Break Free

TOBi - STILL Genre: Hip Hop

Proof: Locked In / Come Back Home (Feat. VanJess)

Tyler, The Creator - IGOR Genre: Hip Hop / R&B

Proof: EARFQUAKE (Feat. Playboy Carti, Charlie Wilson & Jessy Wilson) / I THINK (Feat. Solange)

Vampire Weekend - Father of the Bride Genre: Indie Rock / Alternative

Proof: This Life / Sympathy

Bonus:

Some previous projects I missed early and found during May.

The Grouch - Unlock The Box Released December 2018 Genre: Indie Hip Hop

Proof: Feel Alone / Pretty (Feat. YMTK)

The Grouch & DJ Fresh - The Tonight Show with The Grouch Released December 2018 Genre: Indie Hip Hop

Proof: Devoted / Indigo 100

Kasbo - Places We Don’t Know Remix EP Released April 2019 Genre: Electronic / Future Bass

Proof: Over You (Super Duper Remix) Feat. Frida Sundemo / Aldrg Mer (EMBRZ Remix) Feat. TENDER

Others:

Adela - On The Line EP, The Amazons - Future Dust, Berner - El Chivo, Big Thief - U.F.O.F., Calboy - Wildboy, Chase & Status - RTRN II JUNGLE, Christelle Bofale - Swim Team EP, Ciara - Beauty Marks, Collie Buddz - Hybrid, Curren$y & Statik Selektah - Gran Turismo, DJ Khaled - Father of Asahd, Flying Lotus - Flamagra, The Get Up Kids - Problems, The Head and the Heart - Living Mirage, Holly Herndon - PROTO, Interpol - A Fine Mess EP, Jai Waetford - Figure It Out EP, JAMESDAVIS - MASTERPIECE EP, Jeremy Zucker & Chelsea Cutler - brent EP, jesse saint john - don’t stop dancing. life gets sad. EP, J-E-T-S - Zoospa, Josephine Wiggs - We Fall, Judah & The Lion - Pep Talks, Kevin Gates - Only The General Gon Understand EP, KIAN - BLISS EP, Logic - Confessions of a Dangerous Mind, Mac DeMarco - Here Comes the Cowboy, Maribou State - Kingdoms in Color Remixed, Megan Thee Stallion - Fever, Middle Kids - New Songs for Old Problems EP, Miley Cyrus - SHE IS COMING EP, The National - I Am Easy to Find, no rome - Crying In The Prettiest Places EP, Oliver Dion - Exposed, Patoranking - Wilmer, PnB Rock - TrapStar Turnt PopStar, PRETTYMUCH - Phases EP, Raveena - Lucid, Rhye - Spirit, Rotimi - Walk With Me EP, SAFE - STAY, Santi - Mandy & The Jungle, slowthai - Nothing Great About Britain , StayLoose - The City, Steve Lacy - Apollo XXI, Striking Matches - Morning EP, Styles P - S.P. The Goat: Ghost of All Time, Sufjan Stevens - Love Yourself / With My Whole Heart EP, Tank and the Bangas - Green Balloon, Taylor Bennett - The American Reject EP, Wu-Tang Clan - Of Mics and Men EP, Yeek - IDK WHERE, YG - 4REAL 4REAL

[thesffcorner]

The Hustle

The Hustle is a comedy heist film starring Anne Hathaway and Rebel Wilson. Penny is (Wilson) an Australian, small-time con artist, who mostly catfishes men, and sells tragic stories to get favors. While on a train to France, she meets Josephine (Hathway), a professional, big-time con woman, who operates in a small town in the South of France. After some shenanigans and blackmail, Josephine agrees to train Penny how to make it into the big leagues, and more shenanigans ensue.

This movie was a hot mess. It doesn’t know what it wants to be; is it a friends to enemies story about these two women? Is it a master/apprentice story? Is it a romance? Is it a heist? Is it about one character maturing and the other realizing she doesn’t need to be alone?

The answer? All and none of these things.

Let’s start with the good parts, namely, the comedy. Hathaway and Wilson are provenly funny, and with the right director and the right script, they can be downright hilarious. Here, they got a few big laughs from me, especially Wilson in an  inspired and hilarious montage of learning how to be a ‘professional conwoman’ that involves knives and champagne, and later in a series of smaller cons called ‘Lord of the Rings’. Hathway too gets some funny moments, but she mostly plays the straight man (woman?) to Wilson’s wilder character. This is mostly noticeable with how much of Wilson’s lines are clearly ad-libbed, while Hathaways don’t appear to be.

The duo has chemistry, and in the scenes where they are allowed to be together and play off of each-other, they are great. The problem is, because this film can’t decide what kind of story it wants to tell, they don’t really interact that much, and spend most of the film as enemies, so when the inevitable heartfelt turn happens, and they become friends it doesn't feel earned. Neither of them changes at all; they start the film as total opposites, and they end the film as opposites, neither learning nor growing from the other.

What hurts the film the most is the unfocused, meandering script and bad pacing. Let me illustrate this for you, and mild SPOILERS here because it’s honestly impossible to even tell what is a spoiler in this film.

Before we even get to the part where Josephine agrees to train Penny, we have two separate scenes that establish their cons, they meet on the train, Josephine sends Penny to a different town, she sees Penny in her town, Penny gets arrested, Josephine cons Penny into leaving, Penny meets the man Josephine conned in the first scene on the plane, and finally goes to her house and asks to be trained.

Did you get all that?

Then, we have the montage of Penny training, THEN we have the elaborate ‘Lord of the Rings’ scheme, then Penny gets angry and leaves after Josephine doesn’t pay her, then they meet at a hotel, then they make a bet that they can con $500,000 of someone and FINALLY we meet the mark, young tech millionaire Thomas (Alex Sharp).

There is over half a movie before we even meet the main mark of the film, and even then, it’s not a real con! There’s no planning, no structure; it’s just a series of inane gags, where Wilson pretends to be blind, and Hathaway pretends to be a doctor that can cure her. I won’t even go into the logic of Thomas being naive enough to believe Penny is blind, or that Josephine is a real doctor (who managed to build a functional web-page, and post a photo on Instagram to trick Thomas in a matter of minutes); there’s no point to this scheme, and the time we should be spending showing us how Penny has to use Josephine’s playbook and vice versa, is lost on this mess.

Even still, I could’ve forgiven it, if the ending delivered; it doesn’t. It was really quite bad. Genuine SPOILERS from this point.

First, while I could see how Penny could fall for Thomas (hell, he fooled me too, he was very convincingly naive and charming), how ON EARTH did he con Josephine into investing $500,000 in his app, when she didn’t even know what app he had built to make him rich in the first place?

Second, again while I get why Penny wanted to sleep with Thomas, and why she wanted to call the con off (though the latter was insanely rushed), why didn’t she just tell Josephine that Thomas was broke? And what kind of weird ass, unjustified leap is it from “let’s steal $500,000 from him” to “let’s see who sleeps with him first?” I swear only a man can write a female character like this, especially since the film is more than a little queerbaity with Hathaway’s character up until that point, so her being sexually interested in Thomas came straight out of left field.

And then, Thomas is the real master con artist, and swindles them both. I kind of liked this, because at least then the message of ‘all men are trash’ stayed consistent, but the implication was that even though these were two master con artists, a single man showed up and conned them both? This is the message?

I guess the idea was that Penny and Josephine were so busy trying to destroy each other, they fall easy prey to the real con, but this should’ve been the second act twist! It was the perfect opportunity to showcase properly Penny and Josephine working together, and becoming real friends, while taking Thomas down, but no. Instead, he just shows back up to Josephine’s house and wants to work with them. And then they agree. Oh, and he really did fall in love with Penny. WHAT?

And then the film just...ends, with the three of them together, implying that they really are better together. It’s supposed to be an answer to Josephine’s “I work alone”, except a) this wasn’t earned with any of the character actions until now, and b) Josephine wasn’t alone; she had Albert and Desjardins who she was clearly close with. What, do they not count?

Overall, this was a confused mess of a film. While it had some funny set pieces, and Hathaway and Wilson were good in their respective parts, it was poorly structured, meandering and simply unmemorable. If you really want to watch it, I suggest waiting for it to come to Netflix, because it’s very much where it belongs.

[tcmmylee]

                                       The Crawford Bunch.

John David Crawford II | 67 | Vietnam Veteran | Retired Mechanic from Gorman’s Auto Shop | FC: Pierce Brosnan

John David Crawford II was born in 1952 in Beaumont, Tennessee to a farmer (John David Crawford) and his wife (Sally Crawford). He was the middle child of twelve kids, one for each of Jesus’ disciples. They lived mostly in poverty, their only income coming from the milk and meat that their father sold to the local convenience store. At eighteen, John David II had been drafted into the military and shipped off to Vietnam. When he returned at 22, he met the love of his life, Suzannah Crawford. They married after only knowing each other for about four months, and not long after they had their first child, John David III. He raised his kids with discipline and tough love, so that they would know that the world isn’t going to feed you on a silver platter. Not that he had much money to spoil his children with anyways. Though he still suffers from PTSD, you can often find him sitting around the living room with all his grandkids surrounding him, the youngest on his lap, and telling the stories from when he was abroad. 

Suzannah Crawford | 63 | Server at the Junkyard Diner | FC: Madeleine Stowe

Suzannah Duff was born in 1956 in Beaumont, Tennessee to a mechanic (Bobby Ray Duff) and a school teacher (Margo Duff). She was the oldest of three. When she was fourteen years old, her father passed away in a car accident and the Duffs were left with little money to support the family. Suzannah dropped out of school and got a job by lying about her age in order to help support her mother. When she was eighteen, she met a boy who had just come back from the war, John David II, and fell in love. They were married and pregnant within months of meeting. Suzannah has worked her whole life as a server at the Junkyard Diner and plans to work there for a few more years before retiring. She has always been a kind and nurturing mother, but made sure to emphasize the importance of religion and believing in Jesus to her kids. 

John David Crawford III | 44 | Police Lieutenant at Beaumont Sheriff Department | FC: Bradley Cooper

John David Crawford III was born in 1975 in Beaumont, Tennessee. He was the first child of John David II and Suzannah and therefore had been the most spoiled (until his other siblings arrived). Because he was the oldest, his father had always been a little tougher on him. He was to be straight edged, responsible, and act as a third parent if there wasn’t another one around. His high school grades were mediocre, and though he could have attended college, he chose instead to join the police department in Beaumont. At twenty-one, he met his now-wife Anna-Lee at a gala thrown by the police department. She was one of the sisters of the policemen, and John David II had to endure a lot of flack for asking her out. They have now been married for twenty-one years and have three kids: John David IIII (18), Willie Ray (15) and Carolina (11). 

Mason Crawford | 40 |  Mechanic at Gorman’s Auto Shop | FC: Ian Somerhalder

Mason Crawford was born in 1979 in Beaumont, Tennessee. From a young age, Mason had been a reckless kid. He looked up to his older brother, John David III, but also knew he could get away with much more than his brother could, and so he did, much to his mother’s dismay. When he was fifteen, he dropped out of high school to run away with the love of his life, but returned a short nine months later when they broke up. Despite his mother’s pleas to return to school, Mason got a job at Gorman’s auto shop and has been working there ever since. When he was 24, he met a girl from Nashville who had happened to stop by The Catfish to get a drink while he was drinking with his buddies. With the help of liquid courage, Mason asked to buy her a drink, which led to two drinks, which led to a first date. Him and Magnolia have been married for fourteen years now and have four kids together: Presley Ann (13), Virginia (10), Willow (9), and Noah (5). 

Josephine Nicks | 39 | Pediatric Nurse Practitioner | FC: Zooey Deschanel

Josephine Crawford, better known as Jo, was born in 1980 in Beaumont, Tennessee. When she was born she had the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck. The midwife warned John David II and Suzannah that she may not make it through the night, and if she did, she may have severe brain defects for the rest of her life due to a lack of oxygen. But Jo made it through the night, and showed no signs of mental defects as she grew up. She was a tomboy through and through thanks to having two older brothers to look up to. Jo was the first of the Crawfords to go to college, where she attended the University of Memphis and got a degree in nursing. While she was attending school, she met a med student named Wilson Nicks, one of the only black men in his class of medical students, and fell in love, despite the controversy they faced being an interracial couple in the south in the early 2000s. After graduating, they married and have been married now for sixteen years. Together they opened a family practice in Nashville. They have five kids: Layla (13), Jackson & Eloise (Twins, 11), Rhett (7), and Graham (2). 

Georgina Abel | 35 | 3rd Grade Teacher at Beaumont Elementary | FC: Alexandra Daddario

Georgina Crawford was born in 1984 in Beaumont, Tennessee. Right from the start you could see a maternal streak in Georgie. Unlike her sister, she didn’t like rough-housing with her older brothers. Instead, she played by herself, mostly with her dolls as she set up fake homes and classrooms to teach them, cook for them, and take care of them. It was no surprise to her parents when she graduated high school and decided to earn her degree in english and teaching. After graduating from Tennessee State University, Georgina got a job in her hometown at Beaumont elementary teaching third graders. She spent a few years focused on that, and very much single (she had been in a somewhat serious relationship in high school to Roscoe Reeves, which had ended up leaving her heartbroken for a long while) to her mother’s dismay. At twenty-six, she met Earl Abel while out in Nashville with friends for a weekend. After a year of dating, they got married. They have now been married for eight years and have three kids: Harrison (7), Keaton (4), and Peyton (1). Georgina would still like to have one more girl. 

Hayes Crawford | 32 | Manager at a Michelin Star Restaurant in Nashville | FC: Henry Cavill 

Hayes Crawford was born in 1987 in Beaumont, Tennessee. For four years he was the youngest in the family and was absolutely babied to death. Georgina liked to take care of him the most because she had always wanted a younger sibling, but by the time he was talking and running around at two, he loved to play with his older brothers, which almost always resulted in him getting hurt. Hayes had been the athletic one of the bunch and his parents had signed up him for any sports he wanted to play. It turned out he had a real knack for football and played all throughout high school. His senior year during their championship game, Hayes had been injured so badly he was hospitalized for seven months. The doctor had warned him he would never step foot on a football field again. The road to recovery had been a long one, and Hayes had waited a year before going to college at the University of Tennessee where he majored in business and hospitality. He now lives in Nashville with his wife of five years, Carol Ann. They have one daughter, Cecelia (1), and another child on the way. 

Tommy Lee Crawford | 28 | Radio Host at Beaumont Radio | FC: Matthew Daddario

[wouldadepressedpersonmakethis]

NORA COOPER - OPEN Age: 26 Portrayal: Willa Fitzgerald Alliance/Occupation: Loyalist/Baker  Relationships: Thomas Cooper (brother), Nicholas Stafford (deceased secret fiancé), Laura Harris (best friend), Roy Cooper, Irene Cooper, Nancy Cooper (cousins)

went to work for the staffords when she was eight as a scullery maid at the palace

tbh she was in complete!!!! awe!! of her position there and was proud that she was able to serve the royal family (even in this small capacity!) 

nora had been reluctant to leave home with an ill mother, a little brother, and a father who was often away but she knew that they needed the extra income more than they needed an extra set of hands at home 

nora loved her father, but she never understood what could be so important to take him away from his family so often (he never could seem to provide any of them with a straight answer) 

one day he left and never came back 

several months later, word reached them that he was dead

the coopers never did discover that he had given his life so that others could live and that he was a secret moralist who aided fleeing witches and their families 

he raised his children as loyalists to protect them .... although he one day meant to tell them the truth, when they were old enough (unfortunately, that day never came) 

soon after, her mother died, too, leaving nora and her brother on their own

while working at the palace, nora met and fell in love with nicholas stafford! 

she was rather wary of him, at first, because of his reputation and all the other girls warned her that he would likely to love her and leave her

but slowly he broke through her defenses and she started to fall in love

they kept it all a secret - but nicholas had promised her that one day, he would renounce his claim to the throne and go and live a more simple life with her 

as long as his father lived, however, it could never be ... he would not allow for his only son and heir to give up everything for a kitchen maid 

of course, the king had other plans for nicholas, but he promised her that he would never marry anyone else but her

and as soon as his father died, he would go to margot - who he knew would be a much better queen - and tell her everything 

but then nicholas died - breaking nora’s heart! 

she doens’t think she could ever love anyone else again!!!

she’s also discovered that she may be pregant and she’s terrified about what to do about it or how to explain it

so she’s recently resigned from her post and returned home where she’s trying to restablish the old bakery her parents used to run, hoping she can make it somewhat profitable if and when she has a child w/o a man to help support her

she’s told her brother, tom, everything, and he’s determined to look out for his sister and his future niece or nephew, whatever happens

THOMAS “TOM” COOPER - OPEN Age: 22 Portrayal: Thomas Brodie-Sangster Alliance/Occupation: Neutral/Thief Relationships: Nora Cooper (sister), Ben Wilson (friend), Roy Cooper, Irene Cooper, Nancy Cooper (cousins), Josephine Turner, Jesse Turner (friends/allies), Emma Turner (interest) 

with an often absent father, an older sister who worked at the palace, and a dying mother, tom was often left to himself 

super independent!!! 

honestly was always super resentful towards his dad who he saw as a man who just neglected his family (he had NO idea that he was secretly risking his life to save witches who were being hunted!!!) 

as soon as both of his parents died, tom went to look to find a way to support himself

after drifting in and out of different occupations and trades, he finally settled on one that suited him ... and that was, to steal from people to earn his bread

basically the valerian wars verison of robin hood tbh in that he only steals from the rich and gives to the poor!

just wants to help people who are in bad situations kind of like how his family was b/c of his dad! 

often has a lot of assistance w/ this from jesse and josephine turner 

has a softspot for single mothers/orphans!!!!

sUPER cocky and confident 24/7

the sass is strong with this one

always has a sassy and witty one liner to throw at you

super bright and logical most of the time .... but can also bE DUmB

lOVes flirting at emma turner who DEspises him but that only eggs him on tbh 

recently his sister has left her job working at the palace and is trying to reestablish the bakery their parents once owned ... she’s also confided in him that she was secretly engaged to nicholas stafford, the recently deceased heir to the valerian throne! and that she may also be pregnant with his child

tom loves his sister more than anyone else in the world and would liTERlaly do anything for her!!!!

is determined ot help her and use the money he’s earned (*cough*stolen*cough*) to help support her and her baby 

[nuka-nuke]

| Jack Euler |

Name: Jack Philip Lee Euler

Nickname: None

Age: 31

Birthday: August 23, 2046 (Virgo) 

Height: 6’

Weight: 190~ lbs

Specials: Str 10 - Per 4 - End 10 - Cha 3 - Int 1 - Agi 10 - Luck 1

Eyes: Hazel blue

Hair: Dark brown and very long, always kept in a ponytail because he gets overwhelmed by it getting all over the place.

Body type: Lanky and skinny with broad shoulders and huge feet.

References: Here

Status Pre-War: A mechanic working for a local garage, married to the love of his life who was the more successful out of the two with her job as a lawyer. He moved to Boston for her, originally being from rural Pennsylvania.

Status Currently: An agent with the Railroad struggling to find his way in the wasteland.

Relationship Status: Widower

Spouse(s)/Partners: Vivia Loreña-Euler (deceased)

Sexuality: Heterosexual

Gender: Male

Ethnicity: American

Family:

Vivia Loreña-Euler, wife (deceased)

Jerri-Lynn Kristiana Euler-Oliver, sister

-Roscoe Oliver, brother-in-law

Bianca Oliver, niece

Marina Oliver, niece

Roscoe Oliver Jr., nephew

Jolene Mari-Ella Euler-Wilson, sister

-Ezra Wilson, ex-brother-in-law

Lorna May Ellis Wilson, niece

Aberdeen Lora-Jo Euler, sister

Rosanna Cecila Ophelia Euler, sister

Josephine Arlandria Penelope Euler-Slonina, sister

-Waylon Slonina, brother-in-law

Quentin Leyton Slonina, nephew

Woodrow Reggis Slonina, nephew

Sam Christopher Slonina, nephew

Francis (Ford) Lee Albert Euler, brother

Philip Albert Stanley Euler, father (deceased)

Luanne Georgina Euler, mother (deceased)

Languages: English 

Disabilities/Illnesses/Injuries: None, he is fairly hardy. Mild PTSD from his time in the war and social anxiety which sometimes gives him panic attacks.

Allergies: None

Scars: He has a long scar crossing from the bridge of his nose down and under his right eye, an injury acquired during combat in the war when he was bashed in the face with an enemy rifle, breaking his nose in the process. The man who inflicted the damage was then beaten to death before his eyes by one of his platoon members, which was the first time he had ever witnessed the murder of another person. Jack always feared the inner monster a person could become under trauma from that point forward and hoped to never see himself become that.

Other facial scars include a long scar below his left eye which crosses down his cheek and over his lips. He was working in the garage cutting exhaust pipe with a cut off wheel on an angle grinder, negligently not using a face shield, when the wheel shattered and a piece broke off and embedded into his face. Luckily Ford was there and was able to get him to the hospital, and saved the heckling until after they ensured he wasn’t going to die. He never lived that one down for as long as he and Ford worked on cars together.

He has countless smaller scars on his hands and wrists from mechanic work over the years. Notably he has a large burn on his left elbow which mangles one of his tattoos, from accidentally leaning on a weld seconds after finishing welding something. Various other scars all along his knees and shins (from being clumsy and falling over his giant feet all the time) and one gnarly puncture wound on his left shoulder from a Red Widow bloodbug which he hit with his bat just a few moments too late.

Physical traits: Jack has a birth mark on his forehead that is mostly obscured by the amount of freckles he has all over his face, which continue all over the rest of his body as well. He has an American traditional style eagle tattoo across his chest and a sleeve of random flash-sheet kind of American traditional tattoos all over his left arm, acquired from his time living out of his car and traveling all over the states and adding a tattoo from every town he stayed in. He has wrinkles between his eyebrows from years working in the sun and focusing way too hard, and often looks exhausted due to the creases around his eyes. He has a scruffy beard and extremely perfect eyebrows that always made his sisters jealous.

Voice: Jake Gyllenhaal, but only as Jack Twist.

Clothing: Pretty much hasn’t changed out of his vault suit since leaving Vault 111. Like ever. He added a coat, though. Also he always wears his holotags from the military, his wedding ring, and his pipboy which is painted red.

Fashion Style/Lifestye: His fashion sense is pretty much “how long can I get away with wearing the same disgusting, dirty outfit before Bambi finally requests that I change and do laundry.”

Weapon of Choice: “The Fuck ‘Em Up”, a chain wrapped baseball bat, also painted red, or a bladed tire iron.

Skills: Strength, combat, situational awareness (in nonsocial situations), mechanics, artistic

Weaknesses: Easily stressed out in social situation, has a hard time explaining himself, can be kind of slow, spaces out a lot and daydreams. Very scatterbrained. Often sees things way too literally.

Poor skills: Computer technologies, verbal communication, stealth (too clumsy).  

Affiliations: The Railroad, Acadia

Former Affiliations: None

Enemies: The Institute

Neutral Affiliations: The Brotherhood of Steel, the Minutemen, Nuka World Raiders

Religion: Agnostic

Likes: Cars, working on cars, collecting random trinkets, drawing and writing in his journal (mostly to Vivia), digging through junkyards and scrap and planning how to build a new Corvega one day. Also enjoys cooking and making new recipes for the various types of wasteland animals he kills.

Dislikes: Pre-war food, Nuka Cola Quantum (the radiation makes him extremely sick), most sweets 

Hates: Spiders, radscorpions, insects of any variety. Vivia was the bug killer of their household.

Friends: Deacon, Piper Wright

Acquaintances: Ilya Valle (pre-war), Nataniel Valle (pre-war)

Former friends: None

Enemies: None that he is aware of, maybe there are some out there. Don’t know.

Pets: Sometimes junkyard dogs hang out with him at Hub City. But really none.

Fallout OC friends/family: Brook Cecil, Benjamin Reese, Andre Torres, Bambi (Beth), Sirius Tillinghast, Katherine Vance

Personality: Jack is overall pretty laid back. There isn’t much that can make him lose his temper, and even if he does, he ends up feeling bad about it and apologizing later. He is terrible in social situations and uses his awkward sense of humor to try to bridge conversations, which sometimes works, as in the case of how he scored Vivia’s phone number.

Favorite color: Green

Favorite foods: Radstag jerky, mirelurk cakes, literally everything his mother cooked when he was a kid.

Favorite drinks: Vim!, Vim! Quartz, Gwinnett Lager

Favorite Sweets: If anything, he might have some gum. Overall, not a fan of sweets. 

_____________________________________

Thanks to @madddraws for letting me use their character profile layout!

[greysfanpage388]

The Resident Season 2 episode 15

The Resident Season 2 episode 15

Wow such an intense episode!!

*spoiler alert*

Poor Henry and his mom. 😞 I already had a strong suspicion that his fainting episodes were due to his VNS device. The whole time when they were attempting to save his life was soo intense! I really thought that they were gonna lose him. I’m so glad that they managed to save his life in the end 👍

Now the ball is in Bell’s court. I really hope that after witnessing the entire Henry saga- he’ll come to his senses and cut off all ties with QuoVardis and Gordon Page. 🤞I love the connection between Conrad and Henry.

❤️

Mina and her mom and AJ- I’m glad that we finally got to learn more about Mina’s background and the reason why she has become the person she is today. Her mom Josephine is such an intriguing character indeed. She’s such a gifted surgeon- but so bad tempered. I mean- who would actually throw a scalpel in an OR filled with people?! I do love the relationship between Mina and Austin. I love how Mina finally let down her guard and broke down in front of him and how he comforted her. Shaunette Renee Wilson delivered a fantastic performance this episode! 💪

I wasn’t that invested in Devon and Irving’s patient. I just hope that he learnt his costly lesson not to lie to his doctors and use his twin brother’s identity when being admitted to the hospital.

Do let me know what you thought of the episode guys- I would love to hear from you all 😘

[ru-ruu]

Ive been up and Ive been down….Ive had my feet swept off the ground

BYSOMEBODYWHOJUSTPICKEDMEUPANDTHREWMEAWAAAAAAAYYY!!!!

Ms. Alicia Michelle Howard a.k.a Billie (not to be confused with Billie Jean…), a Chicago legend that has given us numerous tracks and moments over her long lasting career. Of course most notably Love Under New Management (written by the wonderful Ms. Annette Harderman and her late husband Gabriel Harderman), Come Share My Love, Baby Be Mine, Ain’t Nobody Like You and other tunes. All her staple hits and everything you want to hear her perform at a live show. But of course at the Factory we don’t focus on just the hits. The B cuts and the album cuts are just as important and lowkey sometimes better than the singles.

Lets slide on back to 1980, yall know Miki was in a R&B group right? Yall heard of Side Effect?

She was a part of the group for a years, they craned out a funky rendition of Georgy Porgy which is still a part of Miki’s live shows today.

Another popular tune from the group during Miki’s tenure was

I Can’t Play

Ok lets jump to her solo career, the MEAT of it all! Lets share her love for a bit with her first solo album Come Share My Love. We all know about the title track Come Share My Love….

Theres a peak on every mountain…

A shore for every sea….

Its hard to understand were you meant for me…

Theres an answer to a question, but theres no guarantee…

AND I WANNA GIVE IT TO YA GIVE IT TO YA GIVE IT TO YA…..

But have you paid attention to the smooth track titled

Love Will Find A Way

A simple plea for love to find the answer after doing all you can. Nowadays people say love isnt enough in relationships and that love isnt the answer. But without love what do you have? Yeah you need trust and communication and all that but at the center of it all you need love. Thats all we really need anyway…but moving onto the next track that needed more shine and my personal favorite of Miki

Imagination

Before I got into hardcore researching and investigating I thought this was an original song. But nope, its an old Glen Miller tune that was written and composed by Jimmy Van Heusen and Johnny Burke.The tune is what one would call a “Standard”, everyone from Ella Fitzgerald to Frank Sinatra has their own rendition. But theres something about Miki’s version that gives the song power! I believe this was the beginning of Miki revealing that she was a bonafide Jazz artist. Her nickname is Billie…after the late and great legendary Mother of us all Billie Holiday. Miki even played Billie in the biopic Malcom X. But we’re getting a little ahead of ourselves.

Lets slide onto 1987 (sidebar Im still not even born yet at this point) I know I was trying to not highlight her singles and hits buuuuuuuut this song right here…..THIS SONG RIGHT HERE!!!! We all know about the Miki Howard and Gerald Levert love affair it was leeeggggeeennddddaaarrrryy!

That’s What Love Is

Their first duet together was something magical. Hence why I included on my Duets post, go check it out if you missed it. Written by both Howard and Levert and included on her Love Confession album.

This song is just that…..a love confession! In the song they compare themselves to Romeo and Juliet and if you think about it…….thats very fitting. They both come from legendary families, Gerald is the son of the legendary Eddie Levert from the group The O’Jays and Miki’s mother, Josephine Howard, sang with The Caravans. They both deeply loved and adored one another but Miki and I quote is a “Woman of The World” and that didn’t fly in the Levert camp. But they always remained close until his passing. He even wrote on another track on the album

Crazy

Love Confession was filled with love letters between the two,

I been looking for a new love….

Didnt know where it was…

All the time there you were…..

I must have been CRAZY….

Gerald aint slick not one bit! See what happens when artists get involved with one another, they start telling secrets through the music. It’s lowkey sweet and almost like a marriage. It sticks with both parties throughout their entire careers and it’ll always make them think back to that moment when the love was the strongest…..or when whatever emotion was the strongest because there are plenty musical couples that sing songs written by the other party that are break up songs and torch songs sooooooo yeah!

Anyway lets jump to 89 (Im finally born woot woot) and visit her album Miki Howard.

There were some good cuts on there and also her first number one hit! Guess what Im going to talk about first yall….

I’ll Be Your Shoulder

Yeeeessss another Howard/Levert duo, written partially by Gerald (he has writing credits on Mister as well). This track may have solidified the two’s feelings for another. Yes they were deeply in love but here they confess….I’m here for ya baby, when you’re down and out you know you can come to me. Simply put, I’ll Be Your Shoulder! Which eventually is what happened between them, Gerald helped Miki kick drugs or at least played a major role. So these lyrics are true to life, cant say that too much about songs that are out nowadays. Come to think about it the Levert clan were all over this album. Listen to some of the tracks and see if you can hear Eddie and the crew jamming in the back. Also sidebar and honorable mention to Miki’s vocals on the tail end of a song that SHE wrote

Who Ever Said It Was Love

Listen to the veeeeerrrrrryyyy end to hear just how high Auntie Miki can go!

Onto to 1992!! Femme Fatale POW!!

A collection of work with her second number one hit Aint Nobody Like You and a myriad of gems. Miki was always had a classic duet on her albums but this time…instead of Gerald…..she had Christopher Williams on the track.

Hope That We Can Be Together Soon

Yall remember Christopher Williams right? The light skin brotha that was on New Jack City? Had the song Dreamin’ from the soundtrack? And Every Little Thing U Do? Ella Fitzgerald’s nephew? Yeah him and Miki did a cover of a Gamble and Huff tune that was first recorded by Sharon Paige and Harold Melvin & The Blue Notes back in ’75. Christopher was a good choice vocally, veeerrrryyy reminiscent of the original.

Femme Fatale also saw Miki’s “Billie” side  come out once more before the big shebang! Her cover of Billie Holiday’s Good Morning Heartache was a perfectly haunting  tribute.

Good Morning Heartache

Again it was another Jazz standard and another Jazz tune perfectly shaped to her voice. Of course as before everybody recorded the tune but again Miki holds the crown with her cover. She was definitely hinting towards her recording future with this one.

Last track I want yall to listen to from the album is

Cigarette Ashes On The Floor

Im not even going to go into it, please please please just listen to the lyrics. We’ve ALL been there and who the hell says things like this? You make me feel like cigarette ashes on the floor?!?!?! It’s the truth but dam!!

A year later Miki said you know what….I need to sing me some Billie. And thats just what she did. In ’93 Miki Howard released Miki Sings Billie: A Tribute To Billie Holiday.

A tribute to her hero and biggest inspiration. Who has the courage to do an album like that? Now personally I think it should be done more often. Chante Moore should do a tribute album to Minnie Riperton, she already recorded a few of her tunes and who else is fitted to cover a Minnie song? Lowkey…come closer yall lemme whisper this in yall ear….I think Monica should do something for Stephanie Mills. Both of their voices are similar….in a way, so why not?!? Back to Miki though, remember I told yall she was in Malcom X portraying Billie? Well that was a year before this was released so in a way it was a major heads up!

There’s Billie Holiday classics on there like Solitude and My Man and What A Little Moonlight Can Do. But MY favorite is

Don’t Explain

Just listen…’Nuff said!

Jumping over some years and some issues and some scandals and whatever to 1997’s Cant Count Me Out.

Two of my favorite Miki tracks are nestled in the bosom of this body of work. The first being a song that has her longtime friend Chaka Khan and Terence Trent D’Arby (yall know Wishing Well! Dont act like you dont!) and a Stevie Wonder cover.

I Love Every Little Thing About You

The next being

Something I Never Had

Peep the backing vocals on that track! Know who it is? Well…..SAY IT!!! Miki wrote the majority of songs on this album besides the covers. She penned this along with Lemel Humes.

Miki had about three more albums after this: Three Wishes (2001), Pillow Talk (2006) and Private Collection (2008) and numerous tour dates and appearances and hey even a movie about her life!!

  Special mention to the tracks

You Made Me Love You

I remember I first heard that song after I got dumped by my first boyfriend. It immediately made me think of one of the first things he told me”…..Im going to make you love me…..” He did and then he broke my heart seven months later….oh well!

Miki loved to do a cover, she has an album full of them (Pillow Talk). She redid one of my favorite songs

Go Away Little Boy

Now I always got the Marlena Shaw version mixed up with Nancy Wilson’s version. Who can blame me though? Their voices and delivery are almost identical to the T! Miki came through and slapped her own funk on it as she usually does.

She also took on the Ann Peebles classic

I Cant Stand The Rain

She stayed true to the “twang” of the tune whereas Tina made it more current for the times. Both lovely version in their own right!

Last song and I’ll let yall go, some of yall overstayed your welcome and its time for yall to go back to ya mammy house.

Panther

Shes a PANTHAAAAH! Miki described a Panther as the black version of a “Cougar”. She said it sounded more sexy and it fits black women better than being called a Cougar. C’est La Vie on that one…..

Look out for Part 2 of Aint Nobody Like Miki Howard! I got lots more to talk about, we aint done yet!!

Aint Nobody Like Miki Howard Part 1. Ive been up and Ive been down....Ive had my feet swept off the ground BYSOMEBODYWHOJUSTPICKEDMEUPANDTHREWMEAWAAAAAAAYYY!!!! Ms. Alicia Michelle Howard a.k.a Billie (not to be confused with Billie Jean...), a Chicago legend that has given us numerous tracks and moments over her long lasting career.