#just wanna squish squoosh them

[kreyaneven]

— -

Birbmas birb bath request for @drifmas.

I love these little birbos (*/□＼*)♡.

— -

[beannary]

just gonna swoop in here and say teen parent donnie is so real bc like...all of their sentient inventions see them as a parental fogure and sheldon was made qhen they were FOURTEEN so. technically its canon ^_^ btw i love internet and i wanna SQUOOSH her liddol face

YEAH listen i love donnie being shelldon's dad like its such stange circumstances like creating an AI and then realizing that it is fully sentient and also sees you as a father figure like im sure it took donnie a while to fully like accept that and come to also see himself as a dad and trying to figure out what being a dad even looks like considering that shelldon was never like a baby he was just like a fully formed child/preteen

idk im sure it was a weird situation for both of them and also a weird situation for the rest of the family and like them coming to realization that shelldon is a full sentient robo child and that donnie is his dad

also thank you!!!!!!!11 i also want to squish internet's face like her face is so squishable who let her be so squishy!!!

[pianoperson]

We don’t get enough Jonah content. Gimme more soft Jonah.

I like how you think anon. ;))

Huh, soft Jonah... how to function aaaaaaaa

He don’t look it at first, but he squish squoosh on the cheekies. Poke da face cheeks, wowowow super squishy, you will wanna poke again

He gonn pout at you >:<< for squooshing his face but you be like “waahhhhhh your cheeks are so squiiiiiiiiiiiiiishy” and he can’t resist le smile on your face

Because how can he

Speaking of smiley

You and Jonah be having ‘no u’ conversations occasionally

“Your smile is beautiful.” “No, yours is!” “No yours!” “No, yours!”

“You’re cute.” “Am not cute, you’re the cute one.” “No, you’re cute!” “No you!” “No you!”

But those convos end in one way: kiss 😙

Okok he is sO gentle with you when you kiss him??? He’ll cup your face with his cheek, and his kisses are full of passion but they’re never too rough.

He would tuck your hair behind your ear anytime. When you’re eating, when you see each other in the hallway, when you have passionate sessions in the bedroom. He does that because he wants to see your face. Because he thinks... no, he knows you’re the most beautiful person he’s ever seen and he wants to see your face.

Cuddle 👏 session 👏 these tend to happen when a) it has been stressful b) you haven’t seen each other for the whole day, or c) lol idk you just want to. You don’t make any attempt to move, you just lie down beside each other, in each other’s arms, taking in each other’s scent. You can’t help but feel how perfect you fit in Jonah’s embrace, and same for him.

Your hugs don’t end there. He’ll occasionally chase you down just to have a hug, which you’d gladly give because... it’s Jonah and lowkey, you’ve been craving for a hug from him.

Aside from physical affection, Jonah’s gonna show his love for you through gifts. Look, his wallet’s bloated, and he knows this. He’s gonna get you anything. Just make sure you tell him straight that you no like too much gifts, so you don’t have a shit ton of stuff you might not use. But try to accept them haha

HHHHHHHHHHH OK BUT IMAGINE 👏 RUNNING 👏 AROUND 👏 PLAYING 👏 TAG 👏 NONONO LET ME JUST.... you’re probably in a really mischievous mood, because Jonah wants this object you’re holding but before you realize it, you’re like ‘catch me if you can then’ and start running. You slow down at first, thinking he wouldn’t find it amusing, only to squeal and pick up pace because Jonah is actually chasing you. You two continue running around until a) someone tells you to stop (which almost never happens) or b) you get tired and Jonah catches you in his arms, takes the object from your hands, kisses you, and says in a husky whisper, “I caught you.”

Okok I actually really need to let this out.

When. You’re. Sad.

So Jonah’s world is high-class society that reeks of plastic nobles and metallic scents of wealth. Of course, people will judge you, esp if you’re not from high-class society (which you likely aren’t but idk who would be reading this) and this may bring your self-esteem down.

If their judgements don’t bring you down (which is good because they don’t know you and they’re the ones with a problem pfft), then it’s gonna be the prim and proper lifestyle that could. Look, Jonah is proper, graceful, polite, and well-mannered. And in the noble class, that should be expected. But uh here you are, too casual for that sort of thing. And it makes you feel ashamed because Jonah doesn’t deserve someone who probably eats like a pig or burps way too loudly (I know I do 🤭) or is just not the picture of propriety. You want to stand by his side, but you don’t want to ruin his rep and image too.

So you get a little sulky, but you try. You try to be more well-mannered. It’s not that it’s a bad thing to try and be more proper, especially with other people, but it’s the fact that you look a little gloomier, you feel less like yourself as you force yourself to sit up straight and daintily wipe your mouth with a napkin, as you try to seem more graceful, that makes it a problem. And each mistake you think you made, you beat yourself up by saying no that’s not enough for Jonah.

Do you think Jonah won’t notice? Of course he would, you’re the love of his life. Your smile was what started his own fall through the rabbit hole and ended up with him loving you so much. And he would do anything to bring that radiant smile to your face.

No no, he does not like that smile you give him when you say you’re fine, you’re ok. Because that smile does not reach your eyes and your cheeks looked like they want to drop and form the expressions your heart feels.

He will pester you a bit (“are you ok? Are you sure?”/“what’s wrong? What do you mean it’s nothing, is there something wrong?”), but when it’s clear you didn’t want to say, he will give you privacy.

It was one night, when you were alone, that you just broke. Perhaps it’s your thoughts that continued haunting you, perhaps someone said something to you that hit the nail on the coffin. But you couldn’t hold in your insecurities. You started crying because you didn’t feel enough, you felt that you were burdening Jonah. You even thought about leaving him quietly so he can find someone better.

It was also coincidental that Jonah couldn’t fall asleep right away that night because something felt off. He was wondering what was happening to you and decided to check how you were doing.

He caught you sobbing alone from a distance. He never ran so fast in his life as he hurried to have you in his arms and comfort you as the tears fell.

When you calmed down, you confessed to him all the things that brought you down, even telling him that you thought he deserves someone better than you.

“Why didn’t you tell me these things sooner,” he asks.

He’s going to tell you that you are worth so much to him. He’s going to tell you you are so precious to him. And he will tell you that you shouldn’t hide these kinds of things from him through ‘nothings’ and ‘I’m fine’ because he hates knowing that you’re not alright but he doesn’t know how to help you. He can’t be there for you. And it frustrates him because he can’t stand not seeing that honest beautiful smile on your face.

He’s not gonna stop there, though. Jonah is an ‘actions are stronger than words’ kind of guy. He’s not gonna just show his love through a speech. He’s gonna use his body to imprint his love for you.

Oh yes

You know how Jonah’s all like, “I don’t believe in apologizing.”?

He will remind you to not say sorry during times that it’s not necessary.

“I’m sorry if I’m rambling.” “You don’t have to say sorry for rambling. I’m already listening to you, so just go on.”

He doesn’t want you to apologize over things like that because it’s like you’re saying sorry for liking something, for being the kind of person you are, when he loves you for who you are. And he wants you to see that you’re someone who is loved.

Aaaaaaaaaaa Jonah would take you out to stargazing dates!!! And under those stars, you two would have senti moments as you bring up past memories, probably due to the fact he tends to take you to the Lake of Tears, the place where your feelings towards each other changed into something a little more (the place where Jonah calls you by your name for the first time, the place where you first felt your heart race when he held you by the shoulders as he expressed his worries). You would talk until 2am, and 99% of the time, you’ll come back soaking wet because you tackled Jonah into the lake haha

Uhh I probably have more but I can’t recall in the meantime. Well, I’ll end up feeling soft again tonight before I sleep. Hah Jonah, the things you do to my heart.

[cinnamonbundit]

Dude, I Think I Love You (Prologue)

You made an unlikely friend in local pyromaniac, Charlamagne “Sharky” Boshaw, when you came to Hope County. Now, several months later, you both have been traveling from region to region trying to save as many citizens as possible, while also making sure Sharky didn’t burn down entire forests. Aaaand maybe you both secretly (or not so secretly) have a thing for each other. Smut in later chapters. This fic will not be completely canon because I wanna fix the garbage mess Ubisoft has created. 

Word count: 1306

Warnings: cursing (LOTS), vulgar/promiscuous language, smut (later)

You never thought in a million years you’d be where you are today, but then again what normal person would expect they’d be trapped in bumfuck nowhere surrounded by crazy cultist, who are led by an even crazier family. That fateful day of the helicopter crash/arrest gone terribly wrong had flipped your life upside down both figuratively and literally. 

You’d be lying, if you said you hadn’t at first felt overwhelming feeling of hopelessness. Sometimes you even thought that maybe you should’ve just walked right out of that church. But now all your friends and Marshall Burke were gone, taken by those self-righteous dickheads to “save” them. You were all alone aside from Dutch, but of course, Dutch didn’t always make for the greatest conversationalist. You had never felt so alone surrounded by so many people.

You couldn’t wrap your mind around the fact that the weight of Hope County rested on the shoulders of a freaking rookie deputy, who by the way had only been a deputy for a little less than a year. The temptation to just lay down in one of the hundreds of doomsday bunkers built by crazy preppers forever was almost overpowering until..

Until you met him that crazy disco-loving redneck, who probably loved fire more than alcohol, Charlamagne Victor Boshaw IV. He was the first actual person to join you in your fight against the Peggies. Boomer was obviously the first actual fighter you had rescued because hey it was cute dog why wouldn’t you. To be totally honest, it was pure fate you had found Sharky while on your drive.

Subsequent to hearing about the loose cougar in the Whitetail Mountains named “Peaches”, you made plans to take a trip up there from the Hope County Jail. You were just barely out of the jail’s driveway, when you saw the smoke coming from the mountains just ahead.

You sat there debating on whether or not you should head up the dirt road to observe the scene and make sure no one or no thing was harmed. As you drove closer you could just make out the shape of the trailers and the sound of.. Disco music? Did people still listen to that in public let alone recreationally? 

Mildly confused and especially intrigued you kept driving up the path until you finally reached the trailer park. You pulled off to the side and tried to exit the car as quietly as you could not knowing yet what you would be dealing with it. You could never prepare yourself for what greeted you on top of one of the many trailers, holding a flamethrower.

“What up, Shorty! You come for the barbeque?”

“The wha- where the hell are your pants!?”

A smile crept on your face at the memory, and then you were pulled from your thoughts, when said pyromaniac shifted on the bed above you. He had begged for the top bunk, after telling you how once, when he and his cousin Hurk were younger, Hurk had called dibs on the top bunk in their cabin at the Breakthrough Camp. When it came time for them to bed, Hurk had jumped onto his bunk causing the bed to crumble and crush the bottom bunk. Now Sharky would’ve usually thought that sort of thing was the funniest shit ever, if it hadn’t been for the fact that he was laying on the bottom bed and was simultaneously crushed beneath Hurk’s bed. He swore he broke at least two ribs that day… ok maybe it was just his wrist.

A soft snort from his bed broke the silence in the quiet bunker, and you had to stifle a giggle out how cute it was. You couldn’t risk waking him. At least one of you deserved some sleep, after going around all night “kicking names and taking ass” as Sharky put it. You tried to focus on his breathing, hoping it would lull you to sleep…

You were jolted from your sleep when you heard a thud followed by a crash. Looking around the room, you could make out the figure of Sharky, who was only illuminated by the faint glow of the bathroom light, but you could see that he was holding his foot, hopping in nothing except his boxers.

“Oh shit. Did I wake you, Dep?” He said, after hearing a quiet chuckle escape your lips, making you immediately cover up your mouth with your hand as an attempt to stifle your laughter. “A-are you laughing at me, Shorty?”

Through your laughter, you just barely got your reply out. “Sorry, Shark. Are you ok?” You asked once you had collected yourself, only to laugh again at the goofy face he was making as he feigned offense.

“Well, you see I couldn’t see shit because I didn’t want to be rude to Sleeping Beauty and turn the light on in here, so I, very heroically I might add, walked through this creepy ass bunker to take a shower. Then I stubbed my toe on that table and may or may not have knocked off the lamp.” His ramblings sent you into a fit of laughter, which he joined you in. Through your laughter, you dramatically replied, “My hero.. How can I ever repay you for embarking on such a valiant journey?”

“For starters, you can go hop in that shower because no offense, dude, but you kinda smell like Hurk, after Uncle Hurk locked him out of the house for a week and made him sleep in a pigsty, and it’s a real turn off.” You released a snort at that causing a grin to creep onto his face. “Damn, you’re already startin’ to transform, Dep, I think it may be too late,” he said, while leaning back onto the wall behind him with a shit-eating grin on his face. You playfully gasped and threw the pillow from your bed at his head, which he easily dodged. “Shit, Dep! Haven’t you put me through enough pain today!” He said theatrically, while placing a ringed hand on his chest.

“You’re such a dork,” you said through giggles, and you saw his smile return to his face as he leaned his head, hair still wet from his shower, against the wall. “Well alright I guess,” you started, rising from your spot on the bunk bed, “I’ll get in the shower just for you m’liege.” 

He watched you as you slowly sauntered over to him with an unreadable expression on your face before you grabbed ahold of his face and brought it down to you level. His eyes opened wide in shock before you squished his cheeks, forcing his lips into a pout. You lost your composure after seeing his reaction to your closeness and let out a small laugh before starting to speak.

Slowly and quietly with a grin on your face, you mewled, “Sharky,” before you squooshed his face again, which caused him to close those baby browns of his, and shook it slightly. “If you used all the hot water again, I’m gonna kick your ass.” You laughed out, and released your hold on him and (carefully) moved his head back to its spot on the wall with your pointer finger. With that he opened his eyes and sighed watching you walk away and into the bathroom behind him. 

It was no secret that you too had been dancing around each other, after one night at the Spread Eagle where you both got hammered on Mary May’s stash, and ended up drunkenly making out in one of the booths. With his head leaned against the wall he listened to you move around in the small bathroom, before he heard the squeaking of the faucet coming to life, followed by a squeal. He shook his head clear of the sexual thoughts and broke out in a knowing laughter.

“Sharky, you dick!”

A/N

My first crack at fic writing I guess. You may remember me mentioning writing this fic, and obviously this is nowhere near how this whole thing is going down. This chapter is pretty boring cuz I’m just trying to set the mood. I’ll let them have a moment of bliss before chaos insures. I’m still trying to think of a title but I’ll tell y’all when I figure that biz out.

Feedback is appreciated!

[seungceol]

i got tagged by @hughosh (thanks steff my wife) for the commentary tag, where you have to go through one of your frequently used tags and pick 15 comments that you’ve made.

i was gonna do only wonwoo and try and stay loyal but i don’t talk in the tags enough to do only one member so the last 6 are my dino tag bc... i love chan

i’m tagging @soohao @junssi @seveanteen @gyushu-a @yoongilly

wonwoo

1. #YEAH HOW IS HE REAL #A FACE SCULPTED BY THE DAMN GODS

2. #a playboy bunny in the making

3. #IM SHRIEKING #THIS IS MY FAVE #WONWOOS FUCKIN AEGYO #but yknow this surprised me bc its usually a lot more high pitched #this is rly low for his aegyo #why do i know that

4. #OK I JUST SHAT MYSELF BC I DIDN’T EVEN LOOK AT HIS ARMS UNTIL JUST NOW #HIS ARMS HIS HANDS IM GONNA #IM GONNA CRY

5. #those hip thrusts.... calm down bucko..... 0% chill #goddamn

6. #i have a healthy interest in parka wonwoo

7. #PUFFY BF #i wanna squoosh him #like when you fluff a jacket and it goes pluff #i wanna do that #squishsquish

8. #THIS ISN’T OK #wtf.... he’s too cute for his own good..... #he’s gonna get kidnapped one day and he can’t even fight back #with his noodle arms

9. #i love him so much #wonu please do not eat off of your knife #jokes i lick my knife all the time so

dino

10. #what a squish #i love my arrogant little shitnugget look how cute he is

11. #i feel bad for him he had to wear makeup to an exam #poor baby #not even i do that

12. #UH #NO THANK YOU I DID NOT ORDER #what’s the return address

13. #can i tag this as dino even though we only see chan’s nostril like once #i’m DOIN IT

14. #i have... a lot of..... emotions....... about this photo #most of them being just nonstop internal screaming #sometimes external too #lee chan you are a BABY

15. #seungcheol: chan did you fuck up #chan: nO WAY WHY WOULD YOU EVEN SUGGEST