#kaspershark.txt

[pacific-coast-hockey]

Enough about the players though. It is time to make a post about something that is ACTUALLY important:

My mom made my dog a Sharks shirsey out of a baby onesie

His favorite Shark is Mario Ferraro bc like Mario, my dog has no teeth.

[pacific-coast-hockey]

Well, I did a corny post last year after the last home game about how much I appreciate the Cudablr community and I thought I'd do one again this year. It truly has been another year of good times on the internet and in person! However, a lot of this season was really colored by the kind of catastrophic depression I was dealing with from like mid-November to mid-March and it was pretty hard to live laugh love with these teams under those conditions. So I thought instead I'd do a bullet list of some meaningful moments to me this season:

taking @whoredeleau, @msmargaretmurry, and @kitebird-hockey to Sharks games this year and getting to see all of their reactions when the 1.800.injured ad comes up

additionally, taking Becs to a Cuda/Bakersfield Game and her watching one of the face offs with a short king line vs the Condors and bursting into laughter, saying "oh my god, it's just like Mighty Ducks 3!"

also kb being like ".....what is wrong with #3?" at a Sharks game and me having to explain like, oh that's Henry he does everything wrong but we love him anyway

wandering around the Tank before warm ups once, bored as hell, and recognizing @unbenchthekench from behind bc he was wearing a Kähkönen jersey and I was like no way anyone else on planet earth has that jersey. And it was him!

making kpop hearts with @18minutemajor at the All Star Classic at the players and falling in love with the Admirals Russian goalie, also the way the entire arena went apeshit for Shakir rolling up right before the end of the Skills events

going bananas with @bunnymcfoo when Shakir did his rookie lap and everyone around us is being like...who is that noodle call up....

also the Cuda Classroom game and the way Bunny and I both full body flinched when the kids started screaming

the number of times @tausendsorgen and I turned to each other during Cuda games going, "and in the middle of this stands Tanner Kaspick..."

honestly just the amount of dancing and singing in the stands I did this year...like in this economy we have to find our joy where we can, and sometimes that is singing and dancing along to 30 second clips of Avicii and Taylor Swift and Pitbull and Journey and "Fancy Like (Nikolai Knyzhov)"

and of course, not to be outdone, my besties Waldorf and Statler finding out the opening game next season is the weekend they're out of town and the ensuing debate I was treated to over whether or not Statler should skip the wedding

Weird year for me AND the Cuda, but not without impact or meaning, honestly. Maybe it's not exactly the same as last year, maybe the team vibes were weirder and the content was worse and I still don't know who Jack Thompson is and at this point I'm afraid to ask and I was struggling personally through it all, but it's still like. Idk it still meant something. I made beautiful new friends, I spent a lot of time with cherished old friends, I watched my flop team fail to connect their passes, and even when it was hard for me personally, me, Cuda, everyone, ee all still showed up. For me, Barracuda Disease: Year 3️⃣. We'll see what next year has in store!

[pacific-coast-hockey]

ask meme: people id like to get to know better ^_^

Tagged by: @knitpurlgoal thank you comrade!!

Last song: "Gimme! Gimme! Gimme (A Man After Midnight)" by Arkells. I'm always on that damn Arkells, but in my defense they didn't change the pronouns.

Favorite color: blue...any shade... also been really into orange but I think that is bc the golden poppies are starting to make their appearance

Currently watching: Sea Lemon on youtube, my beloved diyer...I'm trying to get back into book arts and she's so soothing to listen to. I did book arts for like...a month last year and then my life fell apart rip, but I want to get back into it because it's so fun.

Spicy/savory/sweet: is salty an option? savory

Relationship status: Mackenzie Blackwood, if ur out there....

Current obsessions: is prompt memes an obsession?? do I just need to get back on my ADHD meds?? anyway I have [checks notes] four prompt memes running this month, bang my line if you're a fanwork creator and need something to do. also baseball's back this month so I'm determined to get back into Giants baseball in a really toxic way like I was a couple years ago. And Bay FC's inaugural season starts at the end of the month and I'm super excited for that!

Tagging: anyone on sharkudablr who wants to do it!

[pacific-coast-hockey]

IMPORTANT FIELD NOTES FROM THE BARRACUDA HOLIDAY PARTY:

Kny was wearing a zigzag headband (like Ilya Sorokin!!)

Valtteri Pulli, huge pride night guy

According to Cardwell they really did not have very much pride tape lol

You can see every damn seat very easily from center ice, a harrrowing concept

I did NOT say anything unforgivable like "sorry you had to sign here to save your career" to Kyle Rau or "it's nice that we have at least one prospect who likes the Bay Area" to Leon Gawanke

And, finally, proof that this guy's legs were not amputated and he can in fact skate:

[pacific-coast-hockey]

Bottom three lines of the forward corps ranked by how good I think they are at making a bowl of popcorn:

Bradley Marek and Brett Kemp - most perfect bowl of popcorn you have ever eaten, melted European butter is even and hot, just a touch of salt. If they make the best bowl of popcorn you've ever eaten, Jmac won't send them back to the ECHL, right? right?? Jmac???

Ethan Cardwell - very good popcorn, masterfully buttered and salted, served in a bowl shaped like a rooster

Scott Sanbourin - whiskey infused cheddar powder on the popcorn with butter and it tastes deeply fucked up and you're doing massive damage to your insides by eating it but you're really into it and can't stop eating it

Tanner Kaspick and Nathan Todd - a perfectly serviceable bowl of popcorn, it's a little burnt and the butter is unevenly poured but it's more than edible

Jacob Peterson - COULD make good popcorn but chooses to experiment with licorice flavoring and caramel glaze because Ozzy insulted his salty Swedish popcorn and now he's mad. The licorice caramel popcorn is a hit with the Europeans and hated by everyone else

Ozzy Wiesblatt - can make very good popcorn but chooses to give Thom a bowl of unpopped kernels

Thomas Bordeleau - can't read the instructions on the popcorn bag

[pacific-coast-hockey]

Radim Šimek is NOT 5'11!!!

[pacific-coast-hockey]

Does anyone else think abt Jan Rutta being like, well I love San Jose and I'm having a great time and all the young guys following me around are the light of my life, so jot that down, Sheng. I think about that a lot.

[pacific-coast-hockey]

What if they demote DQ to the Cuda and promote Jmac to the Sharks lol. I think they'd have to add a new chapter to the DSM to cover what that would do this franchise and fanbase

[pacific-coast-hockey]

>:/ for 9 games we had everything....

[pacific-coast-hockey]

First period update

[pacific-coast-hockey]

Listened to the Leon Gawanke Locked on Sharks episode...takeaways:

JD has gotten SO much better at interviewing, I'm so proud of him truly. it's taken almost three years but I can finally listen to him interview a prospect without having a rage blackout even once

do we...finally have a smart prospect...I swear to god almost every single one of these interviews in the past 2-3 years I've listened to has been no thoughts head empty when JD asks our prospects to comment on play (and again a lot of that might be bc JD is just some guy with a podcast and no journalism training (to my knowledge) who would ask insanely leading questions), but Leon was so thoughtful about reviewing the Cuda's season so far and what the problems were but also what is good with the team...do we finally have a prospect who is able to put his observations into words

deeply funny to me when JD asks a prospect if they're superstitious and they're like oh no not at all, I just have to do everything in the exact same order at the exact same time or I will explode into a ball of stardust. but I'm normal :)

he's enjoying the Bay Area!! He loves the 49ers!! He likes to explore!! We have at least one prospect who is enjoying the Bay Area!!! We have at least one prospect who is happy to be here!! you love to see it.

Rooting for you, guy 😭 also just went through all my screenshots of the Barracuda's lines in the past two months and he's been in the line up way more consistently than I thought...good sign I think. I hope he gets a shot at the NHL this year.

[pacific-coast-hockey]

David Quinn at the Barkuda game with his purse dogs...Randy Hahn there...Drew Remenda there...Jumbo and GMMG there...but most importantly HE was there:

He said I could fight Onyebuchi and Sabourin too 😤😤

[pacific-coast-hockey]

@tausendsorgen and I did Sharkuda Rise '23-'24 at Sharks Paint The Ice!!

My favorite part is when people look at us writing that list and they are like ....what is the theme here....

[pacific-coast-hockey]

mike grier saying he understands if there are frustrations from fans...girl. i literally saw people on tumblr threatening to bomb your car. even if your franchise player wanted to be moved, which it seems like hertl did, do you expect literally any part of this fanbase to take moving tomáš fucking hertl to vegas with grace. the team themselves was so depressed they couldn't skate today. what part of this made you think fans were about to consoled by 1st round draft picks? this team can't even fucking develop prospects, we've had like two guys actually come out of the a successfully in the past ten years. and i'm somehow suppose to be like ok <3 yay <3 over draft picks that probably won't pan out for our team? prospects go into this organization and they end up literally anywhere else. we've been bleeding guys all year because no one wants to fucking be here. "there are good days ahead with the players we have coming." i'll believe it when i see it?

[pacific-coast-hockey]

today is some kind of local holiday to me i think. not bc i hated dq (i didn't, i thought he was fine, he did the okayest he could with [gestures vaguely]) but bc now i get to engage in beautiful thought journeys like "what if they promoted jmac and then pat sieloff was our coach" or "what gmmg has another night vision of firing someone like jwill" or "what is they fire jmac and then scott sabourin re-signs for 15 years and we have a player coach" and "does this mean they'll yeet dq nepo baby henry back to the ahl and promote eldest daughter nikolai knyzhov". much to consider.....

[pacific-coast-hockey]

if i sweat out the cringe of being perceived at working on a new hobby at my softball game tonight. i will post some cuda practice photos shot on film