#leaving that typo bc i dont wanna be in the tag

[altfire]

started watching an anime last night 😔 ik ur all very disappointed in my lack of moral fortitude. im listening and learning and i will do better

[just-some-random-blogger]

The Science Teacher & The Skeptic

Joel Miller x Science Teacher!Reader

Summary: "who cares about space when there's a fuckin apocalypse going on"

Word Count: 1k+

Warnings: crackfic, fem!reader, headcanons, joel 'im a contractor 🤠' miller, fluff, typos, etc.

A/N: ok this is borne of out me geeking about about the film 'the beautician and the beast' to @sloanexx and she's actually the author im just ghost writing it so if you wanna p2 you're gonna have to take it with her. dont shoot the messenger im blue just for consistency HAHAHH in this Tagging: @multifandom-fangirl4 @pinksirensong @aralezinspace

she can be a teacher at the qz

HOLY SHIT

he meets her bc she teaches ellie ✌🏻

OMG

!!!!!! STOP IM GETTING EXCITED FOR IT NOW

[post chat me] THIS RAT FINNA TALK TO ME ABOUT A FIC SHES EXCITED ABOUT AND NOT WRITE IT COS SHES 'NOT A WRITER' BROS ALREADY A WRITER JUST BASED ON THAT

joel never went to college so he thinks she's like super cool for

knowing shit about space and stuff

but at the start he lowkey hates her bc he thinks she's a snob maybe???

idk

GIRLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

GRILL

i do have saur many ideas-

[post chat me] YA DONT FUCKIN SAY 😪🙄🙄🙄

-for this tho like ellie loves her and comes home like

this teacher is so cool she knows so much abt space and stuff

bestie please write it

[post chat me] oh you sweet summer child shes not going to

and joels like who the fuck is this lady

BESTIE IM BEGGING

who cares about space when there's a fuckin apocalypse going on

joel is like you know what a real lesson is?

how to shoot a gun.

how to dress a wound.

not fucking stars and planets

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

BESTIE DO IT PLEASE

and ellie's like k cool wtv im going to school now

DO IT PLEASE PLEASE I BEG OF YOU

AND THEN THEY MEET BC JOEL GETS MAD AT ONE OF HER HOMEWORK HAHAHAHAHAHAH

he sees her drawing constellations and he's like this is fucking bullshit

THE WAY I GASPED

im gonna talk to ur teacher bc this isn't survival

BESTIE YOURE ALREADY WRITING IT SO PLEASE DO IT FOR ME

NO I CANT

[post chat me] 🙄🙄🙄🙄

ok so he confronts her in school right

OMG AND THEN

and he's like i wanna talk to the teacher who gave this homework

spicy

[post chat me] honestly hes such a karen for that ????

and they meet and he's like

this isn't survival skills there's an apocalypse going on and u have her drawing stars like a 5 year old???

HAHAHAHAHAHAH

and she's like u fockin wot m8????

>😀

there wouldn't be an earth if there weren't any planets!!!!

how else would we know how oxygen is formed and how the tides turn to get water!!!!

you big dodo bird

survival isn't all guns and shooting bc if that's all it was the rest of the world would be alive rn!!!!

and he's like oh fok me she fights back

>😞

omg he creamed his pants

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

and he runs home with his tail between he's legs

and he opens one of ellie's space books

and he's like this shit cool

joel wrong sexy teacher right

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

YOU HAVE TO WRITE THIS PLEASE I AM BEGGING YOU

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

im having so much fun just telling u

im smiling at my phone like an idiot

[post chat me] well you are an idiot 🤬🤬🤬

TELL ME MORE ABOUT THE FIC AND ILL COMPILE IT FOR YOU YOU LAZY BABY

HAHAHSJSHSHSHSH

what else is there to know

hmmm

he spends the night reading the space book and the next day he asks ellie like

umm hey can u teach me more about this space shit

OMG

and she's like no old man you wanna know more you go ask my teacher

ahHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

IM SCREAMIN

and he's like .... i don't wanna bc im embarrassed but i also rly wanna know abt how the earth goes around the sun? bc that's cool

WHAT IF THIS WAS MY LAST STRAW

>😭😭😭😭

[post chat me] this modern day man doesnt know shit about the sun that so embarazzing are you not embarazzed the american school system has failed him so hard 💀💀💀💀💀

and he goes to the school and he waits for all the kids to leave bc he's embarrassed and he's like

so... the planets. they all turn around and shit? that's how we get night and day

and she's like yuh m8

KEEP GOING IM CRYING

and he's like um could you tell me more...

HES SO LOVELY

and she's like ok how about you come meet me for an hour every week after my class on wednesday

and he fucking treats that like church

waiT WAIT OMG

SHES LIKE

want to attend my class <3

we'd love to have you

SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UPPP

DONT TELL ME HE SITS IN CLASS WITH THE KIDDOS

and ALL THE KIDS ARE LIKE HEY MR MILLER

HE WOULD NEVER HED SHOOT HIMSELF FIRST I THINK

THEN THEY SHOW HIM THE MACARONI STARS

[post chat me] there are two types of writers AHAHAHH

OK WAIT

MAYBE

NAURRRRRR

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

he lurks outside to listen and learn but

she catches him and is like um???

do u just want me to teach u bc all u had to do was ask

AWWWWWW

THEN HES LIKE IM A CONTRACTOR I CAN MAKE A WAYY BETTER SOLAR SYSTEM

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

u didn't have to like.. sit outside the class just to learn

>😭😭😭

FRRRR JUST TAKE A SEAT

he uses all his tools to make the best goddamn solar system

OMG HE FUCKING REDOES THE CLASSROOM AND MAKES IT SPACEY AND SHIT

and he shows it to her at their weekly session all proud

and she gives him a gold star sticker

places it on his jacket

DEAD

HE NEVER TAKES IT OFF

NEVER WASHES THE JACKET

ew stinky

HAHHAHHAH I LOVE IT

he preserves it

>😔

bc he doesn't want it to get ripped off

when he uses it our

*out

HAHAAH WHAT IF SHES LIKES *pinches nose* joel? is- is your washing machine broken 💔💔💔💔

HAHAHHAHAH

STOP

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

NOOOOOO

he'll shoot himself right there and then

AND THEN HE NEVER COMES BACK

HELLPPPP

walk to a clicker and beg it to bite

EW [HE] WOULDDDD

IM CRYINGGGGGGGG

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

ELLIES LIKE HAHAHAHAH

if i was writing it i'd stop it at him doing up the classroom like u said

like some time after their weekly sessions he does that

and she's like

i think i like this dumb old man

OMG AND THEN

you cant stop thereeeeeeeeeee

BUT ITS PERFECT

LKASJHFKJASASF OK OK

Fin

[post chat me] ok ok bonus cos she still went on 🙄🙄🙄🙄`

it's the intrigue that makes it nice

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

p2 where joel comes for show and tell HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

ahhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

THE SOUND THAT LEFT MY MOUTH

AND HES LIKE SO PROUD FOR BEATING 12 YEAR OLDS PLEASEEE ✋✋✋

IM A CONTRACTOR 🤠🤠🤠🤠

he fucking hates it and is miserable at first the whole time

but then he sees her supporting him so earnestly and then he's like oh shir i like it im gonna send these 12 year olds into the ground

make them eat dust

hELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

NAURRRRRRRRR

[voidcat]

something i wanna add on the “dark content discourse” (this is @ those who support them)

------

also i want to point this one thing out bc i saw a specific anon on lou’s blog and

hey here’s the thing: there is an alarming rate of dark content in fanfics nowadays. each year fanfic wriitng (esp smut) got more detailed but hey this can happen sure

but do you knw what’s as bad as dark content creators using general tags/not tagging properly? blogs writing “smut” and the “kinks” section at the beginning of the fic includes serious matters that certainly are NOT kinks

i cant believe people some people need to hear this but kidnapping, stockholm syndrome, dubcon/noncon, incest et cetera are NOT kinks. these are serious things. this is not a scenario where you tease your loved one and act like you dont wanna do anything sexual. stockholm syndrome is a serious topic and it takes a long while to recover. abuse and harassment are not just physical, in fact they are even more harmful whe psychological. dub/noncon are serious cases where you are fully stripped of control

these are nothing to be romanticized. these are not light subjects. i KNOW everyone copes with things differently but even if/when the professional you’re seeing suggested you to write down your trauma to cope, that doesn’t mean “yea go post it online” they’re probably suggestng a sccenario where you take control of the situation and get rid of your abuser. or hey, jjust the act of wriitng down helps, but in case it doesn’t, burn the paper or delete the file, shred the paper to pieces or erase the whole thing.

i’m saying this because esp when a fandom consists of minors who haven’t experienced or came in close contact with things such as these, they will have a flawed view of these. this is alarming and makes them more vulnerable.

like hey let’s say just wriitng down doesn’t help unless you Publicly share it,,, then idk maybe don’t use general tags? i search up a character name and 4 out f 5 posts are fanfics w descriptions that say “kinks: stockholm syndrome, dubcon, kidnapping...” i cant beliieve we have to say this int he year of 2020 but these are NOT kinks nor are they excusable

and i want to add: would u support it if it was a man wriitng it? bc i remember how fast the author of cmbyn got canceled

okay look i probably left out some things i wanna write n i made shit loads of typos bc my eyes hurt + im beyond pissed but HEY reading leaves an influence on young people, more than you or they realize. Think of them and their well-being before you post something, if you wanna post it so bad, use tags/warnings PROPERLY.