#like I'll watch so long as I can take breaks when its released online

[awkwardfortuna]

Is Dune 2 actually good? I saw the first one and it dragged so much like I'm not saying it's bad but I was only able to get through it by watching it online at home and taking breaks but if Dune 2 is the same as that I need to know cus I don't wanna sit for 3 hrs of desert landscapes...

[missingn000]

a note about tpg's hiatus

hi everyone!! i've missed y'all <33 i want to share a quick note on tpg's hiatus, and how long it will last.

first and foremost, the tl;dr: i will not abandon tpg. the story remains incredibly important to me, and this hiatus is only that: a hiatus. i will return eventually, and while i am not exactly sure when "eventually" is, i hope to begin updating again soon.

now the long explanation. tpg's hiatus has lasted much, much longer than i expected. it wasn't until i took a break that i realized how mentally and emotionally drained i was after writing 600k+ in 2 years, along with being an engineering master's student then starting a job in aerospace. especially after writing sukuna's backstory (75k+ words in one month), my brain was utterly fried. all in all, it's been a lot.

as some of you may know, i started watching one piece in september. and i love it! it's an incredibly fun, well-written feel-good series. it's been a refreshing mental break to engage with a new series, especially since jjk canon has been so disappointing in both content and writing quality. 

if you check my ao3, you'll notice i took a break from jjk with other series in the past: namely dr. stone, sxf, and natsume yuujinchou. this is necessary for me to remain creative and explore narrative themes that i bring back to tpg when i return to it. but by the time my recent hiatus started, it had been well over a year since i engaged with any other series than jjk, and it was starting to take its toll on me. i'm almost caught up on one piece now, which means i'll be able to focus on tpg again soon.

when i return from tpg's hiatus, updates may be slower. releasing 15k+ word chapters every 2-4 weeks was incredibly mentally taxing and required much of my time and focus to constantly be on the story. it wasn't healthy, and other areas of my life were impacted negatively. it can be easy to forget that i'm a real person with real-life responsibilities writing this story in my spare time for free -- even i sometimes forgot this. 

another note on why taking a break has been so necessary is my mental health. when season 2 released and toji + satosugu was animated, the fandom exploded and tpg's readership drastically increased. while this meant an influx of amazing love and support, i also started to receive rude and hateful comments and messages.

don't get me wrong: not everyone has to like tpg. that's totally fine! but as a very sensitive person, receiving hate took a huge toll on my mental health and motivation, and i have needed time to recover from it. i've been doing better mentally lately, and have taken some measures to reduce unkind interactions. i'm working on becoming less sensitive in the meantime so i can handle it better if/when it happens again.

since i've been feeling guilty about not posting jjk content, i haven't been on tumblr quite as much, but i'm still around online on both discord and instagram. mutuals can request my priv @chiidoriii on IG, and my discord is @MissingN000 -- just shoot me a message with who you are when you request! i'll still post fic updates on both new stories as well as tpg content and previews on tumblr, so please stick around :)

thank you so much for your patience with me! i love you all so much, and truly appreciate your support. love, chi <333

[theonethatyaks93]

HAPPY 30TH BIRTHDAY ANIMANIACS!!!!!

I just want to say how truly amazed I am with this show. There are very few words that can describe it. I put a few in the picture seen above, but this is barely anything compared to everything I've said. Animaniacs has changed my life in ways that many shows can only dream of. And I'm thrilled to be here today to celebrate its legacy.

I wasn't born in the 90's. I didn't grow up with this show like I know a ton of people did. I was exposed to it, mainly through the Hub Network ads for reruns, the once-in-a-while YouTube video reference, and even in fifth grade when my teacher showed us a clip of "Wakko's America" for our state capital test (which by the way I passed). I didn't acknowledge this show's presence, at least until 2020. That was a rough year, not only for me, but for everyone. Online school sucked. I couldn't see my friends. I was always crying myself to sleep and staying up late just watching videos to wash away my sadness and hurting. It was hell. I didn't have any comfort. At the absolute worst of times around October, I saw that one of my favorite channels posted a video on the trailer for the reboot of a show called Animaniacs. I was curious, mostly since I'd never heard about it before (well, I thought I hadn't). But the way the characters looked and the amount of people talking about it got me interested enough to click on the video. I listened to the reviewer's thoughts, not really understanding much, yet still being enticed to continue. I watched the actual trailer afterwards and...the rest is history.

I instantly fell in love. I watched the trailer on repeat before the reboot's release, laughing and singing along. I researched the show more and discovered a ton of voice actors I knew. I loved the characters, especially Yakko, I listened to the songs, I watched the interviews, and I talked about it constantly to my family and friends. While I didn't have Hulu, I still kept up with the reboot quite heavily. For Christmas, I got my first piece of merch, a T-shirt, and I got the first 25 episodes of the original show. I watched them on repeat with my sister and we both laughed, sang, and danced around whenever the show came on. After taking a fandom break, I got back into the show in 2021, which came with a new appreciation for Pinky and The Brain and fanfiction. Around this time, I was finally able to watch the reboot and entire original series since I got Hulu. My merchandise collection expanded, my knowledge of the show grew exponentially, and my desire to contribute to the fandom was intense. Not much has changed since then. Granted my merchandise collection is bigger, I can do impressions of a few characters, I met some of the voice actors, I joined the community on Tumblr, I actually wrote some fanfiction, and I've seen so many Animaniacs episodes now that it'll make your head spin. I'm so proud to be a super fan.

My appreciation and adoration for the Animaniacs franchise knows no bounds. It changed my life in amazing ways. And I can't believe its thirty years old today. I'm struggling to keep my emotions in right now, it's all so surreal. So, to all my followers I encourage you to give this show all your love today. It deserves it. Thank you Animaniacs. Thank you so much for everything you've done. You have made me a better individual and have fueled my love of animation for nearly three years. I hope you continue to inspire many more like me to laugh, be silly, and sing "Yakko's World" to pass a geography test. Animaniacs is the greatest show of all time, and I'll never stop saying that. (Ps. this isn't the last Animaniacs Anniversary related post I'm making! The next one will be long! And I'll also be showcasing my Animaniacs merch collection! Stay tuned!) Goodnight Everybody!!

[rpg-elf-girl]

Shadows House

I have a lot of thoughts surrounding this particular show, both good & bad.

Allow me to give a quick summary for anyone who hasn't seen/read it!

Shadows House is about 'a faceless family of nobles who all live within this giant manor, the Shadows House.

When a Shadow comes of age they receive a 'Living Doll' to both serve as their face and to clean the soot they emit from their bodies.

The most important rule of the living dolls is "don't fret over trivial matters"

A task which is difficult for the ever curious doll Emiliko.

Watch this tale unfold as Emiliko & her mistress Kate navigate this ever mysterious Manor together.'

For a fan of slow burn thrillers, horror, slice of life, supernatural & mystery series' this has been an absolute blast!

It's not quite the combination of genres you'd expect from a show, but it works really well here!

In fact I was so into the anime that this is actually the first show where I broke down and read the manga!

Unfortunately there's no official English release, but at least there are some people translating the series!

As much as I'd like to go on about the manga, this post is meant to be more so about the anime so I'll (try to) leave it at that.

Though i feel obligated to warn anime onlys I'll likely refer the manga a lot in a spoiler section latter in this post I'll try to be vague but I can't guarantee anything. For anyone worried about that I'll lable it do you can read on until then.

Everything from the animation to the music was amazing & completely fit the mood of the story! I remember a couple scenes where I actually teared up because of this!

The Ending theme is an absolute banger! I've listened to that on repeat ever since I first heard it! And the Opening is also great! It's cool for it to be an instrumental, stuff like that is pretty rare! I also heard the song in the op as a motif in the music throughout the show! It really sets the right mood in each scene it's in! It's amazing for getting into each episode!

In terms of adaptation almost everything from the beginning to the end of the Debut arc was done amazingly well!

Even with the stuff they cut it still holds true to the spirit of its source.

The main important part that was cut is something that could easily be introduced latter if they decide to go for a second season, so I'm not too mad about that.

However! Everything after the debut is a bit of a different story.

There was a lot I liked about the last couple episodes but there were some parts that were immersion breaking for me.

I've been being vague up until this point l, but I'm planning on going into spoiler territory for both the anime and manga after this. So I'll make a quick spoiler free summary of my thoughts before moving onto that.

I really really loved this show but in my opinion the last 3 episodes were the weakest of them all. They went anime only for the ending. I don't mind that on it's own, but it was rushed and the writing was sloppy at times.

Now I'm not telling you to not watch the show! Most of It's really really good, and I can still see people enjoying the parts I'm talking about if they want to give the anime a try. Overall I've fallen in love with this series and I could never recommend it enough.

If what I'm saying is giving you bad vibes the manga is available and doesn't have the issues I've mentioned. You can look for a translation online, it didn't take me long to find one so don't worry too much about that.

Also! if you're an anime only who's finished the series and want to know where to pick up the Manga I'd recommend at least skiming through the beginning. I know it might not be what you're looking for but there were a bunch of small scenes that either got cut or were merged for adaptation purposes that I think are super cute & give more context to different aspects of the setting. However! Pay close attention during the "night watchers part" something important got cut .

~~~Now for spoilers!!!!~~~

I don't want to make it sound like I'm some manga purist who hates the very thought of the slightest change from the source. I'm anime only for a lot of different shows and I've always despised it when that type of manga reader reared it's ugly head.

While I'll admit some changes did bother me I won't make a fuss about the smaller stuff.

With that said!

I hinted earlier in this post that I didn't have a big problem with Robe-same being cut. That was because without them there it does make for a more complete story if they only get one season to work with.

If there is another season they can easily be introduced latter on. Like maybe Emiliko & Shaun can meet them when the Debutant class reunion is going on before they talk on the roof (or right after that) I actually think that would be the perfect time to introduce them (other than the time they were supposed to appear, but I digress)

Louise teaming up & being friendly with Kate can be explained with some dialogue changes at the first Debutant Class Reunion. Louise can say she was just trying to show off or that she just wanted to get back at Edward and that she isn't interested in helping Kate with her problems. Things can then go on as they did in the manga.

Kates being reckless & telling everything to John can be explained by her being extremely panicked when Emiliko went missing, as long as there are some lines of dialogue adressing this it's fine. Though I do wish she tried to keep some stuff a secret but couldn't because Shaun tries to interfer because he's still brainwashed, or something along those lines. It felt a bit weird after she just told Emiliko to keep that stuff between them. Still that could be explained by how panicked she was.

There are other things, but I don't want to drag the post on too long. Most of the issues can be fixed with little changes here & there.

I never had a problem with the idea of them going in an anime only direction. I just want to have a good time with the show.

Unfortunately I can't 100% vouche for the direction the show went in. There were elements that I can't excuse, even viewing it as it's own entity instead of an adaptation.

My main complaint with it is how they handled the brainwashing of Ricky & Lou. They didn't say a word when the Debutants were talking badly about Edward & even went along with a plan to go against him. It makes absolutely no sense!

Shaun freaked out when John only suggested that he didn't have to be loyal to the house. These guys were flat out rebelling against an adult! It felt like Ricky & Lou didn't have a purpose & were just there to be there.

The whole point of the coffee is to influence shadows against doing stuff like this. It makes the coffee seem pointless and the adults seem dumb for relying on it to control the kids.

I haven't even brought up the fact that both of their brainwashings were broken by something as simple as a few kind words. It straight up contradicts the rules established by both the Anime and Manga.

This becomes very apparent when you consider all the trouble John & Kate went through to free Shaun & Emiliko.

This was my biggest complaint, but I have some other issues as well.

The next big one is how they handled Edward.

1. Why on earth would he even consider kidnapping Emiliko when he had complete control of the childrens wing? Before this point he was depicted as being a lot more crafty than this. He could easily have Kate monitored or something.

2. Why didn't he use his powers to stop them like what he did to Maryrose & Rosemary when they fought back being taken to the adults wing? He's already shown off his power at this point, why not?

3. Why did he reveal his soot powers at all!? Especially while using his face in front of the kids! The whole unification thing is one of the biggest secrets of the house for good reason! There's no way he wouldn't get in huge trouble for exposing it to children!

Here are some other related questions.

Why didn't Kate, Emiliko, & John react to Edward using soot powers? They shouldn't know about unification yet so why didn't they act shocked, or say anything about it?

Is Edward being banished even an option in the Shadows House? Wouldn't the third floor lords just dispose of him rather than risk letting him leave?

How did John even get a veiled dolls outfit? Louise had to use her powers to get Kate one & she left a long time ago.

I can't think of much else at the moment, but I think you get my point.

Please don't take this as me saying that I hate the show because of these episodes. Even if I consider them the weakest of the series I still found a lot of parts to be very enjoyable!

Like I thought it was adorable When Edward was attempting to interrogate Emiliko & she kept being her sunshine self pretending to eat & falling asleep.

Barbara getting to tell off Edward for breaking the rules was great!

I loved seeing Shaun hatch the plan to get Kate into the adults wing to save Emiliko.

Seeing John (attempt to) sneak around the adults wing had me rolling!

The ending scene of Shaun, Ricky, & Lou singing gave me the chills.

(Though I wonder how they'd handle Shaun & Emiliko being brainwashed again since they already used the scenes where they're freed)

Kate & Emilico being propelled by John back to the children's wing was absolutely amazing! I found Shaun & Ricky running over to catch them to be super sweet! (Not to mention the way that scene was animated was absolutely gorgeous!)

Getting hints to what was supposed to come after the debut was nice, at least the groundwork is there in case this gets a season 2!

To (try to) wrap this all up while there were a lot of things I loved and disliked about this show I still had a really fun time watching it!

I kinda hope there's a season two just to see if they can tidy up the mess that the last few episodes created.

Regardless of whether that happens or not I came out of this with a series I absolutely adore.

Heck I could make a whole other post about the manga. (Hopefully one that's less ranty)

Anyway! I won't take any more of your time.

I hope you all have a wonderful day/night! And I hope to see you in my next post!

(Sorry if this one was a bit of a mess!)

[tartagilicious]

[CN] Kiro’s Show Contract Date (eng translation)

✨kirp ✨  

⭐️ this date contains spoilers for a plot not released in English yet!

⭐️ sorry this took so long, doing my junior year of high school online was a very bad decision 😔

⭐️ dedicated to @kudoriee​ @flowerpoem​ & @elainabearie​ , who had to witness me freaking out about this date for two hours straight lol

— 

Seeing the clock advance further every minute, I finally took a deep breath and made up my mind.

MC: If you break the contract, you break the contract… I can’t disregard his health.

I picked up the phone and was about to make a call to Savin when an incoming call jumped onto the interface faster.

Kiro: Good morning, Miss potato chips!

MC: Did your fever go down today?

Kiro: Ah….After taking my medicine in the morning, my body temperature has stabled. My fever’s gone down and my condition is much better than yesterday.

MC: That’s good. You have a good rest Savin and I will take care of this aspect of the show.

Kiro: Well, I know the boss is the best.

MC: In short, you still have to take your medicine today, so please pay attention to the time…

Kiro: I know, I know.

I urged a few more words out of him, but just as I was about to hang up, other voices suddenly seemed to come from the other end of the receiver.... The voices of Kiki and Anna?

MC: Wait wait, kiro, where are you now? Are you at home?

Kiro: Hey, you already heard it. Then should I just come directly in?

As soon as Kiro’s words fell, the door of the office next to me opened, and bright golden hair and his bright smiling face leaped into my eyes. His blue eyes are clear as promised, but the faint sickness under his eyelashes cannot be hidden.

Kiro hung up the call and cleared his throat.

Kiro: Although I said it on the phone, I have to say it again in person: good morning, Miss potato chips~

MC: Kiro?! Why did you come to the company?

Kiro: Of course, it’s because I have to come! Don’t I have to go to a show today?

MC: I was just about to contact Savin to talk about this. Should we cancel this big show?

Kiro: But if the business refuses to perform, won’t you get a big penalty?

MC: You don’t need to comment on the liquidated damages. You need to rest now. If this performance makes you more sick, we’ll have a real problem then. Your health and safety are the first and most important things to me.

Kiro: ...___

He watched me seriously and abruptly smiled.

Kiro: I’m really happy that you care so much about me, but I still want to participate in this big show. First of all, because I prepared a lot for this performance, I don’t want to give up so easily; secondly, um…

Kiro seemed to be unable to think of the second reason. His eyes were so wide for a minute that he grabbed my hand.

Kiro: Secondly, I’ll always do things that make you think I am doing the best, so… trust me.

When we arrived at the show, the place had already begun intensive preparations. Models gathered in the backstage, and everyone was looking gorgeous and brilliant. When Kiro walked in, it was obvious that his mask still covered most of his face, but everyone’s eyes were still chasing the bright light subconsciously.

Reporter: Kiro is coming!

Model: It’s Kilo!

Savin: Sorry, let’s go, let’s go-!

Seeing that various forms of media were coming forward, Savin hurriedly cleared the way ahead and sent Kiro and I into a single dressing room.

Savin: ___, I’ll go to communicate with the stagehands over the specific performance situation, please help me with Kiro.

MC: Ok, leave it to me here.

Kiro: Leave it to me too!

As Kiro said this, he gave Savin a saluting gesture.

I can’t help but laugh, and my nervousness eased slightly along the way. He took off his mask and let out a long breath.

Kiro: Then I'll change clothes first, see you soon!

MC: Okay!

Taking advantage of Kiro’s time to change, I got hot water in the meantime. After he came out of the dressing room, I put a cup of tea in his hand.

Kiro: This is..

MC: Although you say that you’ll be strong, your voice may not necessarily listen to you.

Kiro laughed after hearing my mumble.

Kiro: Maybe I can find new ways to sing and develop new songs after losing my voice…

MC: Don’t even think about it. I don’t want to have a broken voiced Kiro.

I glared at him pretending to be angry, and Kiro’s mouth was tangled, but he obediently took the glass in my hand and drank it.

MC: And along with that, you also need this.

I took out a box of lozenges from my bag and poured one into his hand.

MC: This, you should have one. Some time ago, I had countless experiences, and I depended on them to continue in life, otherwise I might be the inexperienced one today.

Kiro: Were you that busy some time ago?

MC: Yes, the company had to expand its enrollment again, and I saw countless scenarios again, I always felt like I was busy.

Kiro: But when I called you the day before yesterday, you said that you weren’t busy. Miss potato chips, this is being a bad head of staff, obviously you’re still better than me.

He stretched out his voice and “condemned” me. I quickly raised my hands and surrendered, turning the subject away.

MC: Okay, I was wrong anyway… You eat the lozenges first!

Kiro: You’ve got yourself a deal.

He put the candy in his mouth, his cheeks bulging like a hampster.

Kiro: This is also my favourite flavour!

For this big show, Kiro will sing two songs, one is the opening song and the other is the middle warm-up. The two songs are in a different pitch and style. Perhaps thanks to the lozenges, Kiro was in a very stable state during the afternoon rehearsal.

He even has the extra energy to discuss with the director how to integrate into the catwalk better and how to present a more gorgeous stage presence. He still looks energetic and he doesn’t have the appearance of someone performing while sick.

Until the end of the first song of the formal performance in the evening, while preparing for the second warm-up song, I took his temperature again. But, the results this time had me shocked.

Looking at the abnormal value on the thermometer, my heart was pounding, and I couldn’t help but call out to him.

MC: Kiro, you, how are you?

Kiro: Hmm? I’m fine.

His eyes were slightly out of focus. He raised his attention after hearing my question, but his reaction was obviously slower than usual. My worry fell into his sapphire eyes clearly, and he blinked.

Kiro: Is ___ worried about me?

MC: I’ve been worried about how you’re doing!

I handed him the anti-fever medication, and watched him drink the water in the cup without leaving a single drop. I couldn’t help but whisper,

MC: You promised you wouldn’t overwork yourself.

Kiro: You also promised to believe in me. Don’t worry, although I can’t play a lively concert for three hours, I can sing one more song!

He poses a few times like a superhero, but the makeup artist behind him pats his arms and signals for him not to move. Kiro stuck out his tongue, and suddenly seemed to think of something.

Kiro: By the way, can Miss potato chips give me another lozenge? I want to clear my throat again.

Kiro, who couldn’t move, opened his mouth to me confidently. But the cunning blue eyes obviously expose his intent -- it was deliberate. I reluctantly took out the bag and delivered the throat lozenge to his mouth. Kiro quickly took it away with his teeth, but accidentally rubbed away the lipstick on his mouth.

MC: Oops, the makeup is a little smudged! Don’t move and I’ll wipe it away for you….

As I said this, I quickly stretched out my hand, wanting to erase the blemish. Kiro’s face was so close that I could tell, the concealer perfectly covered his illness, and the foundation hid his weakness. In order to fit the stage makeup ordered by the big show, his already stunning face was carved into an even more beautiful face, and almost all signs of exhaustion were cut off.

Only when my fingertips touch his lips can I clearly feel his warm breath. It is as vivid as ever. I carefully erased that little flaw, and with satisfaction looked back at it.

MC: Alright, the prosperous beauty Kiro Zhou, you’re freshly baked!

Kiro looked at himself in the makeup mirror and raised his eyebrows.

Kiro: How many people do you think can handle being charmed by such a beautiful Kiro in one time?

MC: You’ve fascinated everyone in the city in a radius of about 500 miles!

The staff all around laughed at this sentence, and Kiro’s eyes flashed lightly, as if to say something, but in the end he didn’t speak. The staff came and knocked on the door to the dressing room, indicating that the next runway show was about to begin.

I finally adjust the decorations on his clothes, but I can’t help but say a few more words.

MC: If you feel uncomfortable in your throat, don’t force anything. You can do a lower tone. I believe in you as long as you try your best in your current state.

I spoke very firmly and honestly, and I knew he would understand what I meant.

Kiro: That… Miss potato chips, please come and cheer for me.

He opened his hands to me calmly, and I took into account the look he had just taken care of, and just wanted to give him a hug. In the next second, his powerful palm is placed on my back and I’ve received a full hug.

MC: Ki--

Kiro’s heavy head rested on my shoulder, and his hot breath brushed my ears, making my heart thump loudly.

Kiro: I don’t need the attention of everyone within 500 miles, as long as you watch me.

His voice is very soft, but it made my heart beat violently in my chest.

Kiro let go of me and raised his hand towards me, only to have me realise that at some point the box of lozenges were in his hand.

Kiro: This is my lucky item today, let it accompany me on stage!

After speaking, he put the sugar in his pocket, and amidst the sound of music and grand applause, he walked towards the runway. The prelude sounded, and the light followed him with his slowly moving footsteps. When Kiro hummed the first note, I had no choice but to pay attention like the others, completely immersed in his musical world.

He didn’t drop or change the key, but his slightly hoarse voice gave the old song a new charm. Models now wore new costumes of varying styles, passing by him like flowing water. It’s like countless planets orbiting the stars, and Kiro is the brightest one in the universe called the stage. At any time, it’s obvious that I’ll be pulled in by the gravity of Kiro.

The big show ended smoothly with a round of applause.

I just wanted to go to Kiro, but I met a media party who I had cooperated with before and had to accept a short interview offer. When I finally got out, I happened to see the most eye-catching figure in the crowd.

MC: Kiro!

Kiro was surrounded by models, and though he turned his head back to me, he didn’t seem to hear my call.  The models finished taking a photo with him, watched him eagerly, and handed a signature pen to him. After he finished signing, the group still didn’t leave, but asked something of him yet again.  

I hesitated, and when I didn’t know whether to call him again, Kiro seemed to sense something and turned to me. The moment he saw me, his eyes lit up and he waved at me. As I walked over, Kiro pointed to his throat innocently.

Kiro: I’m uncomfortable, ___, please come and be my translator.

Hearing his voice muffled, my heart immediately dropped.

MC: What do you want me to say?

He came close to my ear and whispered something.

Kiro: The casting of the new music video…

I suddenly realised.

MC: They want to fight for roles?!

Kiro: Now that they’ve seen the menacing male protagonist, of course they want to create an opportunity for themselves.

MC: I understand.

I smiled and expressed my gratitude to the models for their love of Kiro, and then I changed the topic and said to them in a more business-like tone:

MC: Kiro needs rest now. As for work, please ask your agent to get into contact with his. Besides, it’s not a matter if casting so much as it is something that can’t be settled in a short time

The models glanced at each other and were too embarrassed to interrupt, apologised to both of us, and left. After they were far away, I heard a light laugh from behind me.

Kiro: ...It seems that this trick is quite useful.

His voice clung to my ears with the fresh scent of candy on his breath, his words clear. I reacted instantly.

MC: So your voice isn’t hoarse at all!

Kiro: Shhh, keep your voice down! It’s hard enough to get everyone to leave, do you want them to come back? And with my “boss” as my aid, they’re too embarrassed to come and chat with me.

I looked around and found that indeed no one was trying to come over and talk to him. Maybe Kiro had great acting skills, because even his eyes after the show were a little sympathetic.

MC: Well, that’s reasonable… but what are we going to do now?

Kiro: Didn’t you just say you were tired? Let’s find a place to rest!

After speaking, he hooked my finger and quietly led us out of the venue together. No one was in the dressing room, and Kiro finally let out a sigh of relief after closing the door. Under the iridescent lights, even with heavy makeup, you can still the fatigue in his eyes.

MC: Kiro, have you been holding on okay?

Kiro: No, that’s why I asked you for help.

Kiro nodded arrogantly and pulled me into the dressing table.

Kiro: cough! I'm dizzy, flushed and can't lift my hands anymore. could i please trouble ___ to remove my makeup?

He blinked as he spoke, and his pupils were so bright that I couldn’t find any reason to refuse.

MC: Then sit down, and I’ll look for something to remove the makeup.

I searched for makeup remover and cotton pads in the makeup cabinet, washed my hands, pushed my hair behind my ears, leaned down slightly, and motioned for Kiro to close his eyes. When he raised his head, the glitter and tich colours at the centre of his eyes were soaked in lotion -- revealing the original skin tone.

It was as if the most exquisite porcelain had been burnt for a moment, his fair complexion showing a strange flush. My heart tightened and I almost blurted out advice.

MC: Kiro, you really need to take a good rest… I’ll tell Savin to push back all of the work ahead of you.

Kiro: In fact, Savin has already promised to let me take a short vacation, so i estimate that you’ll receive word in a while.

MC: Fortunately, this time I’ll let him supervise your itinerary and put you at home for a good rest.

Kiro: Just rest?

MC: ..What else?

Kiro: Since getting a holiday is rare, it’s better to have a little fun.

MC: Interesting.

Kiro: Yes! I bought the limited edition of the game that was released last month, but I haven’t opened the packing yet; there’s also a particularly good looking comic that i’ve stocked up on, and this time i can catch up; and you can catch up on the new episode of my TV series that aired a few days ago!

He used his fingers to count every single activity he could so one by one, and I couldn’t help but rub the tip of his nose with the cotton pad.

MC: Then let the bag of lozenges and your cello also accompany you?

Kiro: That’s better! But well,.. This kind of vacation can only be regarded as substantial, and is a bit short of being “fun”.  It would be more interesting if the video game could be completed as a team; if a TV series and comic books can be consumed with someone to talk about them with, it will be more interesting. When cats tease dogs, I think they’ll eventually become friends.

Kiro opened his eyes, and my reflection was clear in his bright pupils.

Kiro: I think that would be “interesting”.

Kiro looked at me seriously and made a genuine invitation.

Kiro: So in the coming times, will Miss potato chips continue to be my “translator”?

Being watched by such a pair of gentle eyes, it is impossible for anyone to look away, let alone say a word of rejection. The interesting life he constructed is also the interesting life I've experienced.

MC: Ok.. the “translator” may not work around the clock, but I can come after I get off work and I can be your “fun explorer”.

When he heard the first half of the sentence, Kiro’s brows furrowed, but after I finished speaking, he smiled again.

Kiro: Then I have to listen carefully, what’s a “fun explorer”?

MC: The literal meaning is that I’ll do everything that you want to do with you.

Kiro: Really?

MC: Yes! But for the sake of your voice, this explorer will strictly supervise you during the vacation, and you aren’t allowed to eat any heavy sweets!

Kiro: Ah, why’s this? I still want to secretly have a snack party with you!

Kiro pretended to be frustrated and extended the ending sound of his words, but did not refuse my concerns.

Kiro: Then let’s promise, we’re now holiday partners!

He stretched out his hand and pressed my thumb to his. It seems to have stamped an agreement that spans time in my heart.

[datingintampafails]

Chapter 30: Richard*

Let me start by saying, nothing is wrong with Richard*. I match with Richard* right as the nightmare that is “the microwave” has come to a close. Now that I am mere days away from being fully vaccinated, I break the rules a little bit to give myself a headstart before I am able to actually go on the dates. I figure, what is the harm in working on getting back out there? I send a “Like” to him on Hinge, inquiring about a prompt that mentions he had broken both of his arms. The next morning, I get a reply with the story. After discussing that series of events briefly, he goes on to ask more about me and the video games I play. I step on my soapbox for a time. He tells me that he plays a video game called League of Legends, which has a reputation for having some of the most toxic players online. I ask him half-jokingly if that is his way of telling me he is toxic. He swears by his alibi of not having his microphone on when he plays with strangers, so as to not be tempted. We reminisce about Runescape, and he tells me more about some of the games he plays.

We get into the topic of pets, where he says my dog seems nice. I ask him if he has any pets where I am surprised to learn he has two snakes. We talk briefly about what it’s like having snakes, and we segue onto a conversation about television shows due to my dog having a character’s name in a show he watches, which then segued into a conversation about having coronavirus, and travel, and my changes in taste since aforementioned COVID-19.

I narrate to him a conversation I’m having with my best friend about the show of the moment, “Bridgerton,” on Netflix. Pretty randomly, he officially asks me out for drinks. I tell him I have a caveat, that it needs to be next week, as at this time I am still technically not supposed to be dating yet since I am awaiting my second COVID-19 vaccination. I make a joke that I bet he thought I was going to say I had a penis. He jokes back that he was hoping I would. I continue a joke saying I am pretty sure I don’t have one, but if I do have one it’s extremely small. We learn that we have opposing schedules, “we suck” is how I put it. I offer that in the meantime, we can text/call/video chat in order to continue getting to know each other. He sends me his number though offers that we can talk with a “different method.” Being the jester I am, I turn this into a joke of seeing how many alternate methods I can think of. A good sport, he plays along and adds a few of his own, ending in “Mongolian throat singing.” Despite the ingenious ideas we come up with, I opt to stick to contact him via text message.

Upon texting him and seeing my area code, he recognizes it as his cousins lived in that area. He grew up a couple of hours away in rural Maryland. It is late, so our transition to text is brief for now. In the morning I challenge him regarding who woke up the earliest; I win this challenge due to having a call in at work at four in the morning. We then bond over the legendary Mountain Dew Game Fuel, Citrus Cherry, that would come out at game releases; once my favorite drink, being reminded of its existence brought me anger and sadness, which I expressed I was feeling to him. We are getting along so famously, that I decided maybe I can make an exception to seeing him before my vaccine. He says he is fine either way. We start to plan our date and settle on a brewery I like near me.

Much of our texts are light-hearted jabs at each other, nothing super deep. He compliments my quirks often. He often makes jokes about having a smooth brain and sends me many diagrams. He tells me about his major in college. I then realize I don’t know what he does for a living. I ask him what his job is, that’s when he tells me he is in the Army. The stereotype for men in the military is that they usually get engaged quickly, without knowing a person for very long. Being the jokester I am, I take this opportunity to jab at him. My response to his career is, “oh sorry I don’t want to get married next month.” He says that that is why he doesn't have his job in his profile, because of the stereotypes. I joke that I have been misled to believe he had been a chill down to earth guy.

When it is the day of the date, I jokingly keep saying I am going to wear an evening gown; I mention it a couple times. When I arrive, in my skirt and crop top, I see he’s actually dressed pretty nicely and is sitting outside, wearing long khaki pants and a dress shirt. It is a decently warm day, so I hope he's okay. I compliment him, saying he looks nice and he didn't need to dress up for me. He admits that because I kept talking about the evening gown, that he thought I might have been serious, so he wanted to match my formality. I do notice over the course of the date though that he is sweating through his shirt, especially at the underarms; not the most attractive, but a person cannot help these things.

The conversation goes well, we have a nice time and I regale him with the drama in my video game community and just talk about random things. I have a couple drinks and although we weren't planning on eating dinner there, he ends up eating a burger and I opt to just "steal some fries" since I had a late lunch. He is craving dessert so we walk a block to a local ice cream place and get some ice cream as well. When we return back to where the cars were, I realize that he had Ubered there, because another joke of mine was taken seriously regarding getting super drunk. I feel bad and offer to drive him home. We get in my car and I have him put in his address into Google Maps. I drive him there and when approaching his apartment, I see a lot of construction. He instructs me where I can drop him off and suggests that I turn around in a certain lot. He gives me a hug goodbye and I drive off.

I get completely confused and lost in the construction, between closed streets and cones blocking lanes, so I get stuck in the vicinity of his apartment for five minutes before being able to find my way back to the main road. I let him know of my troubles driving, and also when I got home. He thanks me for going out and says he had a great time. Whereas I also had a good time, I found it strange he made no moves whatsoever during the night and I didn't really feel a romantic urge with him.

I get my second COVID-19 Vaccine and take a day off to recover. We still talk at least daily while he is away on his trip; while he is gone I focus a little more on the other guy I am chatting with, John*. I've told my mom of my predicament between the two men, and between her and I, I decided I'll go out with Richard* again, give him another chance. If things still aren't progressing or feelings startup, I will end it and entirely focus on John*.

Richard* asks me when he can see me again and offers to cook for me. I give him my Friday night, which is a day after I am seeing John* again as well. On Thursday, he texts me to verify, saying "I'd like to see you tomorrow, did you still want to do dinner?" I told him I meant to confirm that day. We don't talk besides that, which is good for me because I don't have to worry about getting texts from him when I'm with someone else. The day of my second date with Richard*, I text him to ask for his address again and ask for suggestions on parking, since the construction was such a fiasco for me, I'm still traumatized lightly. He tells me and after a few hours, I get some complicated news regarding my gaming community, so I ask Richard* if I can reschedule to tomorrow, Saturday. He says it is fine and so we just chat for the rest of the day.

On the day our date will actually happen, he again seems to verify the date, asking me if I'm planning on coming over "today." I snarkily replied, "yeah I don't bail, you said 730." He asks me what I want to drink, as he must be grocery shopping. I panic and say seltzers. I take a quick nap and then let him know I am headed to his apartment. When I arrive, I try to follow his parking suggestions but get confused and don't see anything. After driving around for over five minutes, I start to panic as I don't see anything. I find a random gravel lot that is in earshot of where I had dropped him off on the first date, and I call to admit defeat. I send him a photo as well to show where I am. He comes out to find me and almost walks past my car. I flash my high beams at him to indicate it's me and he hops in the car. We drive around a few minutes and luck upon a spot that is close to one of the side entrances to his apartment complex.

I follow him to his apartment, he is again dressed nicely, and I am wearing more comfortable clothes. He is wearing a nice shirt, but with jeans. We get to his apartment and it is slightly better than a typical bachelor pad, but definitely not overly showy. He is still finishing up dinner, chicken pad thai, and he gets me out a white claw to drink. We chat briefly but he starts acting weird, just off. I just sit in his gaming chair and spin around, look at his one snake, and stay quiet. In a way, I am fine with the silence, as it solidifies my unease about this going anywhere. He eventually speaks up, saying he just got a killer headache and isn't feeling well. Due to his travels, I joke about him having coronavirus.

When the food is ready, I let him serve me, I tell him to go light as I don't eat much. He had talked a lot of game regarding his pad thai being good, and unfortunately, it was pretty disappointing. He used chicken thighs, which I am not a huge fan of, and the noodles seemed almost soggy. Richard* was aware of this, however, and commented that this wasn't his best dish and had used a new kind of noodles. I don't like and say that it's just alright, at least palatable. We watch some Brooklyn 99 and eat on his couch, sitting on opposite sides of the couch. After dinner, I get an official introduction to the snakes and get to pet them, it is bizarre, but kind of cool. Definitely not as fun as playing with, say, a dog. Shortly after that, I say it's getting late and I should probably go home. He walks me back to my car, which is a need since his complex is a maze. Again, he makes no moves and gives me a hug goodbye. For me, it's easy to see that something isn't quite right here. We chat briefly, for the next few days, as I'm not ready to immediately break his heart.

When he texts me four days after our date, explicitly saying the following, I see it is a perfect opportunity to come clean:

He took things very well, and I didn't hear from him again. I commend myself for being a real human and telling people how I feel, rather than ghosting and not giving others closure. I wish more conversations could go this way. I feel bad for the guy. It isn’t his fault that I ended up “playing the game” and doing what you’re supposed to do when you’re dating, which is, not to get stuck on one person and date around. It just so happens, he ended up being the one I obviously didn’t like as much and had to sacrifice for his own good. It’s possible that only due to my extreme attraction to the other guy, that he never had a chance as it was shadowed by my feelings for someone else.