#like if i wake up in the morning and say hoho my shoulder hurts and won't move normal shit

[thedreadvampy]

I'm putting together my approach to go back to the doctor again for the first time in 5 years to have the My Body Has Chronic Don't Work Syndrome Please Diagnose Me

however I'm really struggling to put into words the Why I Want A Diagnosis of it all. If you have a chronic illness (I'm specifically pursuing an EDS diagnosis), particularly if it's one for which there's no direct cure or treatment, what's your reasoning for wanting a concrete diagnosis? All takes are useful - physical impairment/pain stuff is the most useful but anything (other physical issues or neurodivergences) will help me get my brain moving.

I mostly tbh just want to know what it is and what to expect. I want to be able to say 'i have these symptoms bc I have EDS.' when Ido physical activity or start a new job or seek medical attention I want to be able to say 'here's a heads up about what my needs are and why.' and tbh I want. validation for the fact I've been in nearly constant pain or neuro fog since I was like 8 years old. bc even though I know it's real there's a big difference between a set of subjective symptoms and a label. like. feels like every few weeks I discover another thing that Isn't A Problem For Anyone Else and it's been literally 20+ years I've been just Getting On With Things.

(it would also help a lot with my sibling's diagnosis, if either of us can get a formal diagnosis it'll smooth the road a lot for the other one and they're a Lot iller than me)

[7wanderingpaws]

Simply, Yours. (4)

Pairing: Baekhyun x reader

Genre: non-idol AU, hapkido teacher AU, domestic AU, PhD Student!AU (is this is a thing?)

Word count: 2.1K

Warnings: FLUFF! ENDLESS FLUFF

a/n: This is just pure fluff, so whoever needs a bit of comfort and gentleness, this is the right one for you! As always, I am very thankful for any feedback, my inbox is always open! 

xxx

Waking up the next morning was strange, to say the least.

Waking up with a tired, achy body was also strange, to say the least.

Waking up pregnant was probably the weirdest thing ever. Well, it was more like waking up with the knowledge that you were pregnant, since the belly had a long way for it to show.

However, waking up to an empty bed was something you didn't want to go through again. It wasn't because you needed someone, no. You needed him to be next to you.

Turning to Baekhyun's side, you ran your hand under the duvets where he should have been lying only to find it slightly warm. Good. That meant he was still around.

Slowly getting out of the bed, you made sure to stretch out the tired muscles and once on your feet, you proceeded to meet your boyfriend in the kitchen.

Since you earned yourself two days off of work after yesterday's incident, and since it was Thursday, it meant longer weekend for you.

Quietly shuffling out of the room, you spotted him preparing something you couldn't see. Jumping two big steps, you landed just behind his broad back that was clad in a simple grey shirt from Adidas sponsorship for hapkido championships he attended.

“Good morning,” you said, wrapping your arms around his lean waist. You could feel his muscles tighten under your touch.

Baekhyun gave out a quiet, breathy laugh that made your heart skip a beat before he turned around smiling at you. “My beautiful princess has woken up, I see.”

Looking up at him with puppy eyes, you pouted. “Yes, and my handsome prince was not next to me.”

He wrapped his left hand around your waist to bring you closer while the other hand cupped your cheek gently. “You were sleeping so tight, I couldn't wake you up. Just look at this pillow imprint on your cheek, sweetheart,” he laughed again before caressing your cheek lovingly.

Sighing, you leaned into his touch. “I was so tired and I still feel like sleeping for hours and hours-”

“That's good, because that is the only thing you are allowed to do for the next forty-eight hours, Y/N.”

“With you next to me, of course,” you finished, cheekily grinning.

He shook his head with a smile. “Well, that sounds like a plan.”

Now that made your eyes open up properly. “What do you mean?”

“I took two days off,” he shrugged, his eyes sparkling.

“Really?” you squealed, jumping to wrap your arms around his neck. He hugged you back, squeezing your waist tightly. 

“Of course,” he whispered. “What wouldn't I do for you? Plus, I need to keep an eye on you for now.”

“Then why are you up so early?” you whined suddenly, pulling away.

“I was preparing breakfast.”

“That has time.”

“Not when you are pregnant and after a burn-out.”

His words made you hold your breath, your heart beating fast with excitement as he stared into your eyes with that endearment you never witnessed in anyone's eyes before. And oh, you were so blessed and thankful for being on the receiving side.

You also couldn't not notice how the words “you are pregnant” sounded from his lips - so natural, so familiar. He cared so much about you and you didn't doubt he was most probably plotting things about the baby, too. And even though you were used to his caring and endless affection, this had a completely different emotion to it. This was taking your entire relationship to the next level. You definitely had a solid reason to get married as you were sure once you broke the news to your families, that would be the first thing they would demand you both to do. After all, they have been waiting for the decisions to be made, except you and Baekhyun were just fine with being in a relationship that did not need a verified document and some signatures.

Of course it wasn't like you and Baekhyun did not want to marry, no. Getting married meant spending money, and if you wanted one thing, it was to treasure your relationship and make the most for yourselves only, without having to spend so much money on a useless ceremony...

Certainly, you daydreamed about it sometimes. Having a big wedding, a beautiful long dress that would show maybe a protruding belly that would prove the power of your love, yes. Handsome Baekhyun impatiently waiting for you at the end of the aisle? What a delightful idea! It left an inkling sensation in your tummy.

But you were nowhere near the position to dream of such things. There was still a serious talk to be done between you and Baekhyun about your financial situation and strategies about how you would provide for the baby.

“Yeah,” you whispered finally, closing your eyes and resting your forehead on his shoulder. “Yeah, I should be more careful, right?”

Baekhyun hummed in agreement, caressing your back as he leaned back on the kitchen counter. “We both have to be very careful about you from now on, alright?”

“Mhm.”

“You promise, love?”

It took you a few moments, but eventually you raised your head to look into his eyes. He was searching for your gaze, for your approval. There was a tiny hint of desperation behind them, too. Was he so worried about the child that had yet to grow?

You smiled gently. “You want this baby a lot, right?”

“Yes, I really do, Y/N.” Now it was his turn to be silent for a moment. It was obvious his mind was busy with thoughts, with questions, with excitement and worries. He sighed. “You made me worried a lot yesterday. I should have paid more attention to you and instead I was consumed in my own thoughts and unresolved anger…” he trailed off, dropping his gaze down and sliding his hand over your hip to your lower belly, resting his hand there. “And the fact that we talked about having a child just few days back and it actually happened… You want it as well, right?”

Not once did you stop staring at his face, his red cheeks and messy hair that was now falling into his eyes. “I stand behind my words, Baekhyun. I want this. I want the baby. I want you. It is my only true dream. And to answer your question: yes, I promise to be more careful.”

He licked his lips before looking up at you, the hand that was resting on your belly now caressing your cheek again. “I'm glad we are on the same page, then.”

Something in his eyes seemed a bit off so you couldn't keep it to yourself anymore. “What is bothering you, Baekhyun? I mean really bothering. It has been a few days and you never told me…” trailing off, you were too scared to face the truth.

Although considering his love confessions, you were hoping it wasn't something that would break your heart.

He gave you a weak smile, scrunching his nose up. “Let's have breakfast first, and after that we will talk, alright?”

-

It wasn't entirely easy for him to spill what was bothering him for the past few days. The reason was simple: he felt embarrassed and stupid, because what he was about to say would definitely not please you. He couldn't help it, though. The way you suddenly left for work later than him in the mornings; how you would come home very late, drained out. And then that sentence that made his heart skip in pain and disappointment…

“You did ignore my words when I asked about having a baby,” he trailed off, not daring to look you in the eye. You were sitting at your small table on the floor, breakfast finished and tea cups empty. “I was genuinely needing you to somehow approve of my wishes… I was dreaming about it for a while now, especially after seeing our countryside friends starting their families. And then you were just like “hoho, your report” and it hurt me and I just… yeah,” he blabbered, not knowing how to word his troubled mind.

You were trying to suppress a smile at how adorable he was being, but it wasn't easy. Squishing his cheeks was the only thing you wanted to do. However, he was waiting for you to say something, stealing a glance from behind of his bangs that were hanging over his eyes. “I'm sorry about that, Baekhyun,” you started, reaching for his hand, squeezing it. “I will not lie to you - it scared me. Having a child in our financial situation is not easy, you know that as well,” you reminded him gently, to which he nodded. Before continuing, you hesitated.  Of course you couldn't just go on telling him how your boss would kick you out once he found out that you were pregnant. That was a thing you had yet to worry about, especially since he was so keen on seeing your blood test results from the doctor. You could only hope the doctor would try to cover for you, as you believed you looked desperate enough for him not to comply with your crazy boss. “But the miracle came by itself and now that it is happening, I feel like it was supposed to happen.”

He gave you a lopsided smile that made your heart skip a beat but it died down just as suddenly, as it appeared. Sheepishly he untangled your hands and he raised it to massage his neck, once again not daring to meet your eye. So there was more to it, you though. “Well, yeah but there is still one more thing. And this is by no means me blaming you, it is just how my head works so silly that I felt that way-” he sighed, looking at you. “I had a suspicion you found someone else.”

W-what? You? Cheating?

You were too taken aback to be able to react to his unexpected words. 

He himself seemed to be troubled, sorry and so embarrassed that you wanted to make it easy for him by not reacting dramatically, although you really felt like slapping him for being so ridiculous.

“You suddenly changed your schedule, you were coming home late, we couldn't speak properly. And then you were always tired and suddenly you would leave later than me in the mornings. I-I saw you getting into somebody's car,” he admitted, shaking his head at his own words. “You were smiling and it just seemed so… strange.”

Your heart was hammering loudly in your ears, the realness of his words too severe for you to grasp their meaning.

He really thought you found someone else?

Silence was the only answer for now, for you had to recover. 

Baekhyun was nipping at his bottom lip, trying to read your face but to no avail. You became unreadable and strangely, that was a good sign for him because he knew he hit the wrong spot, he misunderstood something. He was relieved.

“Baekhyun,” you let out finally, “that's just utter nonsense.”

“I know,” he replied immediately, letting out a shaky breath.

“I want to act like you just haven't said that.”

“You should.”

“I would never-” you started but felt your throat being restricted, “-ever cheat on you.”

He nodded. “I know.”

“For me there is nobody else, Baekhyun. For me there is only you.”

He kept nodding as he shuffled towards you, taking you into his arms. “I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you.”

You sniffled, fighting an internal battle. Why were you wailing for goodness sake? You were just discussing things. “I got promoted and suddenly had a big load of work. My boss is carpooling me... I would never cheat on you,” you repeated.

“Shh, I know. I know it all. I'm a fool.”

You felt his breath on your neck, and you eventually curled your hands around his middle, burying your face into his shoulder. “You suck ass.”

He laughed breathily, running his hand up and down your back. “I do.”

You smiled, pulling away gently to see his face and he took the opportunity to cup your cheeks, running his thumbs over them to get rid of the moisture.

“You rock ass. You managed to get promoted and you managed to get pregnant. Damn, Y/N. I am lucky to have one hell of a woman,” he kissed your forehead.

You burst out laughing, him following suit afterwards. “What will I do with you?”

Shrugging, he just kept smiling at you, happy everything got resolved. “Just love me.”

“Oh, that I can manage,” you nodded, leaning it to fulfill your task by kissing him senseless.

“Wait-” he blurted out suddenly, stopping you mid-air. “I need to ask you something.” 

When you were waiting for him to move on, he continued: “When you called me yesterday from work and I told you to come to me and said that only you are allowed to come,” he paused, a big smile creeping onto his face. “What was it you replied to me?”

When you understood where he was going, you couldn't help but chuckle, sensing his flirtiness. “I said it would be tricky.”

He nodded. “You knew already then? That you were pregnant.”

“Yes. I was in the toilet, seeing the result as I was calling you… I needed to hear you. We kind of shared the moment together, so basically you were there when I found out.”

“You should have told me right away,” he scolded gently. “If you would have done that, I would have come and get you straight then and there.”

You shrugged. “It isn't important, and besides - it's not like you can also miss your lectures, Dr Byun.”

“Oho!” he shouted at the name you gave him, making you giggle loudly. He joined the giggle session, leaning in until your open mouths were almost touching, wanting to finally kiss you, but not before he whispered. “I like that name very much.”

-

Thank you for reading! <3

[t4a2t4s2u5y6a4]

Your MLDD boys life in AU with medieval setting. Let's enjoy~

#MrLoveDreamDate #fanfic #MidYearContest #AU

Why Is Everyone So Noisy?

Knock knock.

"My Lady, are you awake yet?"

What? It's already morning? Sigh. I should stop reading romance novel until midnight.

"My Lady, may I come?"

"Yes. I'm awake."

Ah. My eyes hurt. Did I overslept while reading book? No wonder my body is chilly since I'm not using my blanket properly.

"Oh my, are you reading until midnight again?"

"Shhh! Anna, keep your voice down. If dad found out he will yell at me again."

"You know that Duke is someone like that but you still dare to provoke him. I don't know if you're just a brave lady or simply an air headed."

I know that my dad is a scary person among nobility. Even The Royals don't dare to mess up with him. But still, live as a caged young lady like this isn't my style at all.

"My Lady, what time you sleep last night?"

"I don't really remember. What's wrong?"

"Not only your eyes are red, but your eyes also swollen. Your face looks so pale too"

"WHAAAAT?"

Drap drap.

No no no. Don't tell me...

Crap! Who is this horrible girl in the mirror? Is this really me? This is bad. If my dad found out he will start lecture me for hours!

"Aaaaaa. Anna, what should I do?"

"First you should wash your face. I will come back with cold water and towel. Also I will bring some camomile tea and breakfast."

"Anna, you're my angel!"

***

After wash my face and relax my body, now my face looks more like a human. What a beautiful life I have here.

Or not.

Braaaaakkkkk!!!

"MY LADY!! WE'RE IN TROUBLE NOW!!"

"Kiki, how can you act like that in front of your mistress? And don't be so harsh with the door."

"It's not the time to chit chat. Anna, you should dress up My Lady now. The Royals will come to our mansion!"

Give me some rest QwQ.

***

Just one line and everything start in hurry. Our mansion become so bussy since this morning because everyone rushed every preparation. In other room, Anna and Willow dolled me from head to toe. Just why The Royals come today.

"Willow, you're serving my dad this morning right? Aren't he supposed in the mine field now? Why The Royals suddenly come?"

"Sigh. That's something I want to know too. Our butler, Mr. Milles receive a letter from capital and told us that The Royals will come to have lunch with you and then like what you can see. Everyone is bussy like bees now."

"Me? Not my dad?"

"Yes. The letter said The Royals want to have lunch with you."

Did The Royals forgot what happened the last time they come without my dad knowledge? Are they bored enough and don't value their life to come here?

***

Time sure flies so fast. Just a while ago I wake up and now I should stand in front of my mansion door to greet our estimate guest.

Klotak klotak.

Oh, here they are. A dazzling carriage with royal knights in the left and right. Can they come more quietly? Why they always bring so many people here. 50 knights are too much.

Clack. Sound of carriage door open.

"Ah, Miss Chips~ Long time no see~"

A guy with blonde hair and blue eyes run over me with his warm smile. He open his arms wide like want to catch something.

"Kiro, stop that. Mind your behaviour in front of everyone."

"Then I can do it later in the private room?"

"That's not what I mean."

Another guy with brown hair and eyes grabbed blonde guy's collar while his another hand is in his waist.

"Thank you for visiting our mansion, your highnesses, Prince Gavin and Prince Kiro. It's been a while since the last time we meet."

"Ah..um. Yeah."

"What is that, Gavin? Why your face become red so suddenly?"

"Cough. It's the weather. We are on carriage for so long and it's so hot outside."

Someone from behind Gavin's back appeared and grab his shoulder.

"Well well. It can't be helped since our beloved Prince Gavin is so shy. Hoho~"

"Why are you also here Minor?"

"You won't stay for a hour if I'm not come along, your highness. Please let me help you. (whisper) Don't forget that I'm your cupid."

"Wha-?? Ehem. It seem you lack of works recently. I will give you more when we come back."

"Noooooo. Please spare me your highness!"

I'm so tired waiting for them in front of the door and when they will come in? My legs become numb since a long time ago. Can they continue their conversation when they're already in?

***

Now we are on the guest room and enjoy some tea with snacks. Ah, finally I can breath.

"Now now, Miss Chips. When will you spare your time for me? Since it's almost fall season I think scenery near the lake will be beautiful. How about we have a date there?"

Let me introduce them. He is the second prince, Kiro. He is so bright. Not only his face but also his personality. He is very populer among commoner as The Light of Loveland Kingdom.

"You will be a dead meat when you step out your feet with My Lady, don't you know?"

This serious face man is the first prince and Loveland Kingdom's crown prince, Gavin. He is a sword master and rumored as a cruel person. But actually he is kind and shy. People was misunderstood him because of his action and expression.

"You mean in the Duke hand or in your hand, your highness?"

"You're not allowed to talk here. If you need some friends to talk you can talk with the maids over there."

"How mean of you, your highness~"

And the last is Gavin attendant and his right hand man. Minor. I heard they are childhood friend. No wonder they are so close.

"So Miss Chips. How about my propose (date propose)?"

"Well, I should think about that again. I..."

BRAAAAKKK!!

Ah. It's a nightmare. Devil just come to this room. I can tell it from the sound of the door. RIP the door. May God bless you.

"Propose? I never hear a funny joke like this in my entire life."

Yes. That's my dad. The hellish duke. At your service.

"Ah, Duke Victor. It's not like what you think."

"Ho. You know what am I thinking? Let me hear then."

Minor, I apreciate your loyalty to your master but you should stop it right here. I don't want to see any bloodshet in front of my eyes.

"Don't be so furious, father in law. You make them scared."

This voice. Don't tell me.

"Who is your father in law?"

"Lucien? You're also here?"

"Yes, My Lady. How can I miss an interesting event like this, right?"

"Don't! Ignore! Me!"

Duke Victor is my dad. He is called as 'Hellish Duke from The North' by people in capital. Just one word from him and everyone will silent. But I think that not work sometime.

"Duke, your face have more wrinkles than usual. Look at me and give us more smile ^^"

"Asdfghjkl!!!!!"

Lucien is my dad co-worker. A young and brilliant nobel. Our family is a business partner since generations ago.

"How have you been this last days, My Lady? I miss you so much."

Chuuu~

My bad, I forgot to put the word 'sly' in Lucien introduction. No one dare to come close to me, not even mention kiss my palm except him.

"YOU!!!"

"Duke, this is a costume. I just pay my respect to My Lady. Or did you think anything else? ^^"

His sly face is beyond your imagination. You can't tell what Lucien is really thinking.

"Stop with your nonsense and release my daughter hand right now. You fox!"

"Hm. It's too bad that your scary dad is here. We can continue it when we're alone, right My Lady?"

"Errr. I think it will be difficult."

"My Lady, are you worried about me? It's okay. If he value his business then he shouldn't do anything to me. At least now."

"I regret sign a contract with someone like you."

"Fufu~ Like what I said before. If you terminate our contract then you should give your most beloved to me as a compensation. I hope you not forget about it."

"You fox. Don't come any closer to my daughter!"

"It's okay anyway. We can still be together even if you not terminate our contract. Right, father in law?"

"SAY THAT AGAIN IF YOU DARE!!"

Again. Lucien and my dad just play run and chase while using me as their wall. Are they still in kindergarten or what?

"Miss Chips! What did Lucien mean by that? Are you going to marry him? No waaay..."

Kiro, please. It will be a miracle if I can go out my mansion,.don't even mention anout marriage. I don't think I can marry in my entire life.

"Your highness are you okay? Hang in there bro! Gavin? Hello? Don't stand like that you make me scared."

Poor Minor. He is swaying his hand toward Gavin many times but it seem Gavin has lost in his own thought. At least Gavin not noisy like the other. But is he okay? He is standing like a rock for a while until now.

"How can you marry someone else. How about our promise when we are kid, Miss Chips?"

"Gavin? Bro? Breath! Don't die! Broooo!!"

"...."

"We can live together. 3 of us in my mansion. I will prepare the master room for you beside my room and My Lady so you won't be alone, Duke."

"I should sold my soul to demon instead to fallen angel like you."

Did everyone forget our purpose gathering here today? To be honest I'm hungry. I mean I need more than enough energy to play with these people.

"Anna. How is the preparation for lunch?"

"It's already finished. But My Lady, you should do something about them first."

"Like I ever success do that. Can anyone replace me and stand here? I'm done with this."

That was my daily life. A caged nobel lady who has super protective dad because I always surrounded by noisy handsome men.

Murmuring "Should I accept proposal from neighbooring prince we get last week?"

"NO WAY!!"

What? They can hear me? Did my voice come out? Sometimes these 4 people can be in harmony too, huh?

***

[My Lady, if you want to live a free life please give me your hand in marriage. I will ensure no one will disturb us here.

From your secret admirer.

Horseman♡]

========================================

Omake

17 years ago, at the Duke Victor household.

"I want to marry daddy when I grow up!"

"Why you want to marry me?"

"Because daddy is so handsome, smart and rich!"

"Dummy. You can't marry your dad. If you grow up later you should look to someone worth like me. Although I guess you can't find a better man than me."

***

Present day, at the garden.

"My Lady, I heard you like someone who is handsome, smart and rich?"

"Where did you heard something like that, Lucien?"

"It just a coincidence. Although I'm from a marquessate household, actually I'm richer than you father. You know when your family in the blink of bankruptcy 10 years ago our family make an agreement that...."

Bonk.

"Ow. It's hurt. Who is that throwing book to someone else head?"

"LU-CI-EN!!"

"Oh, Duke. How are you? ^^"

"GET OUT OF MY HOUSE YOU FOX!"

===================fine=================

[thecardsimagine]

Of shipwrecks and seafoam

Summary: Let me tell you a story about a pirate and a merman, finding a love that goes beyond insecurities and death. Let yourself be taken away onto a journey about doubt and secrets, understanding and a bond that even goes beyond the deep blue of the ocean.

Pairing: Merman!Julian Devorak x Pirate!Reader (Nonbinary) Rating: Mature because of swearing and suggestive content Warning: Blood, Death, Killing Genre: Romance, Drama, Alternate Universe

a/n: It’s getting... more intimate I would say, hoho. No, I am joking, it’s just cute. Tell me how you liked the chapter!

Chapter 5 - Boundaries

The day started rather uneventful.

You woke up in the blossoming morning hours, getting to see some seagulls hopping around you and checking you out. With loud screeches, they flew away as you moved as if it was your fault that they got scared. Huffing, you sat up, feeling something sharp and dry at your side. With a look under your shirt, you confirmed that the seaweed had dried up and started to crumble away, though pieces kept sticking to you and hurting the wound.

Sighing, you rolled around, taking a sip from the water before you stood up tall. Even without the stick, it was much easier to get up now, and you were thankful for that as it wouldn't take a toll on you anymore to move around. Nevertheless, even if you valued Julian's care, you were not going to leave the dried up sea-puke on you for any longer.

Speaking of which - the merman was nowhere to be seen. Though you didn't mind as he probably got enough on his sleeve - at least you thought he must have some kind of life after all - you couldn't deny that you missed some company. But for now, the thought about getting your wound clean was enough to keep away any bad feelings that might occur from the previous night.

Stripping yourself, you were careful about ripping off your shirt. Surely, the cloth had seen better days, now stained with dried seaweed too, but you weren't going to complain and instead, just throw it into the water with you. Though that day promised to be a sunny one, when you first stepped foot into the ocean, a cold shiver ran over your body. You were used to cold baths, but of course, right after waking up this wasn't exactly the definition of fun.

But you bit your tongue, strode into the cold until you were up to your knees and prepared for impact. It would hurt, you were sure, but it was still worth it to get off the seaweed bandages on your side. Settling down, you let the plant get soaked for a small part of a minute, determining the time by the slowly creeping up of pain in your side as the water got in contact with your flesh. That's when you used your hand to peel and pick off the plant from your body, careful to not accidentally rip off some healing parts of the wound with it.

"Well, hello there ~" you heard suddenly, startling you so severely your hand tore off an especially significant piece of seaweed. Screaming bloody murder, you had to determine you had just ripped off some scab too and you gave Julian a furious glare as he immediately came up around the side to inspect it. "Oh, we'll need to wrap this again," he mumbled, biting his lower lips. Bringing your hand into the water, you used all your strength to splash him, which caught him off-guard, though it only made him giggle.

"We wouldn't have to if only you wouldn't creep up on me like this!"

Getting up immediately, you made it short and painless, rubbing off the small parts of seaweed that still remained on your body. Sadly, it wasn't as painless as you would have liked it and you swore and hissed all the way back to the shore. You immediately put your clothes back on, while Julian came after you, snatching your shirt which you had lost in the waters after the initial shock and he had picked up and held out to you.

"I'm really sorry I startled you, I didn't think you'd be quite that… jumpy." He could barely hold back his grin as he said those words and you only huffed, marching off into the direction of the woods. "Ah, wait!" he yelled after you, and you looked over your shoulder, not slowing down in the least. "Where are you going?" he asked, worry in his voice. "I need new firewood!" And with that you were off and gone into the thicket, leaving behind a discouraged Julian.

"Sorry I acted this way," you mumbled quietly, knowing fully well he could hear you. "I shouldn't just have run away."

"I understand it. Sometimes I just want to run and leave everything behind too," he reassured you, draping another layer of seaweed over your wound. "You do?" you questioned, again, genuinely interested.

"Yeah, I… I'm a little different than the others, I guess? Did some things they did not approve of. Lift the arm, please."

Nodding you did as he asked, making sure he could reach the wound properly. "And you really think that green stuff helps?" Lifting up half of a shell, filled with the green goo you had come into contact with before into your view, he asked, "This?"

Agreeing, his mood seemed to lift, as he told you with much confidence, "Absolutely! I made it myself! It's the best cure for wounds like this!"

"Are you a doctor or something?" His response was a chipper, "Yes!"

If you had learned anything about him by now, then that he took your health somehow incredibly serious. It's not like it really had to concern him, but he still did whatever he could. Even when you had tried to chicken out from another treatment of seaweed and goo, he had made it very clear that there was no running this time.

In fact, you felt a bit bad. After the hysteric argument, you had left him for almost an hour while you searched for new firewood. In reality, you had found yourself a spot to sit down for some time, trying to regain your composure. To say he had surprised you really had been an understatement. It had literally put you in a state of fear, something you still hadn't been able to lose around him yet. He treated you well, and yet, your body was in constant agony about his being.

Where your mind had been reasonable already, every fiber of your skin still repelled the idea of letting down your guard. You weren't sure if it was some sort of instinct or if there was something that your body wanted to tell you with how strongly it refused Julian's presence. But when you had finally stepped out of the forest again and saw him dragging his body out of the water and already halfway over the beach, making you feel incredibly bad seeing his worried expression.

When he saw you, his face had immediately lit up with relief, and he explained he had gotten worried after you were gone for so long and feared that something had happened. And for once, you believed him.

"Next time, when the seaweed dries out then you can ask me to remove it. This way you won't hurt yourself again. We can't have you lose more blood, can we?" He finished up his work, and you gave it an approving look over before pulling your shirt over your head again. "You really like that stuff, don't you?" you asked, pointing at the leftover seaweed in his hand. "Oh, this? I love it!" It shows, you thought, only smiling meekly at his enthusiasm.

"Human doctors are currently really interested in leeches," you explained, trying to find something to compare his interests to. "Leeches?" he returned puzzled. It made sense that he didn't know the little, brown worms, as they only lived in other parts of the lands and not so much in the big, wide ocean. "They are little animals. And they attach to you and suck out your blood!"

"Ooh…" he mumbled. "I would love to get my hands on those."

"Of course, you would." Somehow you had to laugh about the thought of him admiring leeches in the claw-like hands of his, only for them to bite him and him freaking out like any normal person would. You heard him scoot closer to you, his tail touching your legs with how close he was. His hand came up to your chin, pushing it up until your eyes met his. There was something sensual about the way his face looked when he was only inches from yours, and his words sent shivers down your spine.

"I don't understand why you are laughing, but I like the sound of it."

It took you a few moments to snap out of it. Even though you should be used to these random teases or flirts of his by now, they still managed to make your mind blank out for a second until you could take control of your thoughts again. Basically jumping away from him, you brought some distance between the two of you, much to his confused surprise as he watched you scoot away.

"Oh, wow, Julian. You really need to work on those boundaries," you muttered, face slightly flushed from the situation. "Boundaries? Why? I am your doctor, I need to be close," he retorted, winking at you slightly. Oh, what a tease he was. He knew exactly what was up. "Don't tell me your view of fish people has changed by now? Has it?" You let out a loud snort, getting comfortable around the fire and picking up some sticks to light it up. "You wish!"

He let out a dramatic sigh, placing one arm over his forehead. "I do, my dearest. I do wish to change your mind badly." Biting your lip, you tried not to laugh and keep up a tough act, though he saw through you right away. "You are so dramatic for not being human!" you complained, now it being your turn to sigh dramatically.

"As if you don't like it!" With another wink, Julian scooted back into the water and away from the fireplace. "You really don't like fires, huh?" He shook his head, positioning himself properly into the water. "Mermaids… are surprisingly flammable. We had our reigning leader get a little too close to humans before, and it didn't end well."

"Surprisingly, considering you are literally wet all the time. But it sounds like an interesting story, you should tell it to me sometimes." A weak smile came over his face as he looked at you. "Sure… Some other time, okay?" You found it strange that he was reluctant to talk about, but you figured it must have been a bad topic for him to talk about, revealing one of his own weaknesses maybe. In the end, he must have been just like you, not trusting you completely.

"Can I ask some questions?" he asked all of a sudden, making you halt in your movement, as you tried to light a fire. "Huh? Sure, I guess?" Even though you took your eyes off him to go back to rubbing the sticks together, you heard him take an excited deep breath, before long held back questions seemed to swell out of him.

"What do you do on those things you call ships? I've seen them plenty of times, but I always wondered."

"We…" You made a pause to think for a second. Were you just going to tell him about pirates and ship wars? Would you be able to or would it cause you another day of crying? "We transport things. Over the ocean! And we… Yeah, that's it."

"So, why were you fighting, then?" You weren't sure how, but Julian seemed to know how to ask all the right questions. You kept him on hold for a second as you noticed sparks coming from your sticks, quickly lightening the fire. He shuffled in the water, his fin moving up and down in a splashing sound as he waited patiently, watching your every move.

"Sometimes, people want to steal your wares. And you need to defend it from the others." He let out an understanding 'Oh' and you decided you didn't want to tell him about your pirate lifestyle and how you were the reason that everyone was dead because of what all of you did. A thought lingered in your mind, that you didn't want him to think badly about you. After all, he was the only thing pretty much keeping you alive at the moment. Until now, you hadn't realized how dependent you were on his presence, and understandably, you didn't like it all too much.

"What is it like…" he asked, interrupting your string of thought. You felt a wet hand come up to your feet, softly caressing your skin as he brushed over it. "To walk?" Thinking, you shrugged your shoulders. "What is it like to wave your tail? It's only natural, I guess."

"But does it hurt?" he insisted on talking about the topic, and you nodded vaguely. "Sometimes… When you step on things, it hurts. Or when you receive a wound that you have to walk with. And when you get older, your bones will start not working as good as they did when you were younger. Do you not have that when you get older?" His eyes still on your feet, he seemed to think about your words before looking up at you.

"How old do you think I am?" The question caught you off-guard, and you stuttered a little as to try and find an answer to it. Inspecting him, you spoke out the first number that came into your mind. "Twenty... Seven?" Julian smiled pitifully at your guess, though it was followed by some soft laughs while he propped himself up on his arms to face you better. The fire was crackling peacefully next to you, and you set up the second pot to cook some more water.

"Let's see... If we take it in human years, I think I am around 756 years old. And I am still young! The blossoming of my youth so to say," he confessed, wiggling his eyebrows. You couldn't help but snort at that, having never heard something so ridiculous before. But when you looked at him expectantly, you realized he was not joking, his face void of any untruth this time. "Shit, you're serious…" you mumbled, staring blankly at him.

"Sure am."

"But how?" Shaking his head to acknowledge your question, he stroked his chin thoughtfully. "I have seen many humans age before, we just do it in a different timespan," he explained, and you couldn't help but believe him. "So, you revealed yourself to more people before me?"

"Only two, but no need to be jealous of them, I never engaged with them this much." You let out an exaggerated groan, and he laughed, sounding soft like a wind chime. Then again, he had caught your interest with his confession, and you couldn't help but dig a little deeper. "But why do it? Why risk showing yourself to them?" Lying down again, he thought about it, poking his claw-like finger against your big toe, making you jump as you found yourself to be ticklish.

"I was just curious, you know. About them… The humans…"

"Julian, can I ask you something more serious then?" His eyes perked up to you, and he nodded while running his hand continuously over your foot. By now, you didn't have a fear of him touching you anymore, or felt like pulling your limb away, and it was a subtle affection that you didn't mind.

"Do you know what we humans say about your kind? That you are luring sailors into the water and eat them? Is that true?" His hand stopped, his eyes unwavering from yours as his stare intensified. "No…" he finally admitted, avoiding his gaze almost instantly. "It's not."

With a sigh, he let off from your leg after brushing over it for a few times more. He robbed back, halfway into the water, not looking at you at all. "I am sure you are hungry, let me get you something good." A smile crept over his face, but he still avoided to look at you. "Hey," he shouted as he was already shoulder-deep into the ocean.

"Do you… still distrust me so much?" Finally, he looked up at you, his expression sad. It made a genuine impression on you, and you couldn't help but believe that he might actually be hurt by the actions you had shown him before. "No, Julian… I don't," you finally admitted, and a big, happy smile appeared on him.

"Will you tell me your name then?" he asked and suddenly, you realized you had never introduced yourself to him. "It's [Name]!" By now, you had to yell so he would hear you as he drifted off. And though he didn't scream back, you heard him say, "How pretty!" before he ducked away and vanished into the ocean.

Leaving you behind with more questions than answers and a wildly beating heart.

[almondbiscotti]

WFH Day 3: 8 April 2020

7.00am - Woken up by alarm. SNOOOOZE. 

7.15am - Woken up by second alarm. I should really reset my alarms

8.00am - Wake up proper. Suddenly remembered I have a scheduled VC with my bosses at 8.30am

8.16am- Scroll scroll scroll social media. I still have time. 

8.20am - Boss texts me to set up ZOOM VC for our meeting at 8.30 

8.22am - Set up ZOOM VC and sent details to bosses. Have a weird feeling in my stomach

8.27am - Panic as I flush the toilet. Quickest teeth brush of my life

8.29am - Throw on a random cardigan cos I have no time to put on a bra or change out of my PJs. Realise my hair is a joke and put on a hair band on a miserable attempt to tame it. 

8.30am - VC with my bosses. Is nice to see them. :) I like my bosses 

9.40am - VC ends. Was a good, productive meeting. Does mean more work. But it’s good. It’s all good. 

9.45am - Water over my plants. Okras’ leaves have gotten bigger! I am so pleased. Deliberated if I should harvest my chillies but dear Lord it is a hot morning. Maybe later. 

9.57am - Make coffee and breakfast. Breakfast is just toasted bread with cheese. Coffee coffee coffee I love coffee. I love even bad coffee because no coffee is worse than bad coffee.

10.11am - NOMONOMNOM Cheese toast tastes like my childhood. I love. 

10.12am - I watch American YouTuber while eating. Awww her friends did a quarantined birthday party thing for her it’s so sweet! Wondered if my friends would do something like that for me. Remembered I live on the 13th floor and no one’s gonna be able to drive by my house screaming Happy Birthday without people thinking they’ve escaped from IMH. 

10.35am - DEAR LORD IT’S 10.35 I NEED TO WORK

11.00am - WORK WORK WORK 

11.11am - Call a colleague to ask about something involving my CEO. I’m always amused by how she says my name. She places a lot of emphasis on the second syllable.

12.00pm - IT’S LUNCH TIME! But I’m not hungry. Hmmmmm

12.10pm - WORK WORK WORK 

12.15pm - My shoulders hurt. Remembered a friend told me my WFH setup is not ergonomic. 

12.16pm - Roll Housemate’s much more ergonomic chair over to use. 

12.17pm - WHOA REALLY BETTER LEH! Shoulders still hurt but definitely less strain. 

12.20pm - Realise Friday is a frickin public holiday this week. Homg I totally forgot it’s Good Friday. Sorry Jesus I’ve been a terrible catholic this Lent. :( 

1.02pm - JESUS CHRIST WHAT ARE THE DUDES AT THE AIRBASE NEAR MY PLACE DOING WHY ARE THERE SO MANY PLANES?! Hello WFH can. 

1.05pm - Dear Lord what kind of industrial sized vacuum is my neighbour using why does it sound like a frickin tornado?

1.06pm - Oh it isn’t my neighbour and a monster vacuum. It’s random boat chugging up and down the river next to my house. Why are there chugging up and down? Catching people who aren’t social distancing? Scaring fish? Fantasy cruise now that travel is banned? Who knows? NEA knows? 

1.09pm - I should eat. 

1.20pm - Okay lunch! Decided on Japchae for lunch. 

1.35pm - Fuck, japchae is a lot of work! 

1.50pm - But Japchae is delicious! OMNOMNONONOM

1.59pm - Remembered I scheduled a VC with a colleague at 2pm. FUCK.

2.00pm - Text colleague to delay to 2.15pm

2.01pm - God in heaven above why am I so sticky and gross. SHOWER TO CLEANSE MYSELF 

2.11pm - Showered and bra-ed on. Phew 

2.12pm - Rolled housemate’s chair back to his table. It was good while it lasted. 

2.15pm - VC with colleague 

2.45pm - VC ends. Short and sweet. :) 

2.46pm - HOUSE MATE IS HOME YAYYYYY

2.50pm - Make Japchae for housemate’s lunch. 

3.10pm - Second time means I’m much faster hoho. 

3.11pm - WORK WORK WORK 

3.24pm - Housemates comes to ask me if all the dishes in the sink were used to cook just one dish. Yes.....? :( 

4.36pm - OH MY GOD HOW IS IT 4.36PM?! Time just flew by. 

4.52pm - ARGH I HATE INTERNET SEPARATION.

5.24pm - Dear Jesus in heaven above this email is difficult to write I HAVE SO MUCH CONTENT. 

5.50pm - Finally send out the email phew. Realise I have to do it again tomorrow. Comforted myself that at least I have a template to work with now. 

6.03pm - Boss replies my email to say it was well written EHEHEH. I’m not too proud to say I also need praise once in a while. :) Also cos that email took me nearly an hour to write and half the damn day to prepare for. 

6.28pm - Staff texts to ask me something. Realise I owe them something. ARGH SO MANY THINGS TO DO. Promise to send it over tomorrow. 

6.30pm - Write list of things I MUST clear by tomorrow. 

6.50pm - Okay okay I’m done I’m done. I’m so tired. :(

And there ends WFH day 3!