#like in both my classes today people have sat directly near me when theres other seats open

[gloombby]

convinced people can tell im sick bcuz why do they keep sitting next to me

[jisungiepwark52]

afraid ; han jisung

" i can't let go or i can't catch you "

" yahh y/n~ " you heard someone called out to you as you turned behind to see your best friend, jisung. you guys been friends for as long as you can remember. it won't be a lie to say you fall for him.

you guys hugged each other as you both chatted on the way to your class. you both arrived there and sat on your individual seats.

" hey your friends with jisung right? " a voice said as you looked up to see haeun. she's one of the prettiest,kindest and smartest girl. an ideal type of every guy.

you nodded at her and she gave you a pink envelope. " help me give this to him please. thanks " she said as she ran off to her seat.

" hey what did she give you " you heard your tablemate, minho asked. you showed him the envelope as he gasped.

" yoo she's giving a love letter to him. see. theres a heart after beside his name. a pink envelope. " you looked at him who's inspecting the envelope.

you would be lying to say you weren't jealous. you wanted to tear and throw the letter away, but you were in position to do that. you sighed as you put in your bag probably giving it later when you both go back together.

you looked at his seat to see haeun sitting beside talking and laughing. you looked down hoping not to see it again.

" jisungg~~ lets go home. im so tired today " you said as you moved near to jisung as he was packing his bag.

" sorry y/n. im hanging out with haeun today " your heart dropped.

" oh okay. i understand see you tomorrow " you said to him giving him a wave as he went out of class with haeun. you looked down biting your lips hoping your tears not to flow out.

you began walking home alone. never have you ever walked home alone cause jisung was always there to accompany you. " if she's moving so fast on him why did she give me this letter. why couldnt she just give it to him herself. " you thought " it's okay y/n its just one day. " you talked to yourself as you plugged on your earpiece and continue waking home.

well it wasn't one day. more like everyday. everyday jisung couldn't go home with you, he was 24/7 with haeun. even during project works when he could choose his own partner he would be with haeun. no more sleep overs, no more walking back together. no more shopping together. he was with her that much that you couldnt even give the letter she gave you to him.

jisung was laughing, his gummy smile showing. his eyes becoming smaller. but the reason wasnt you. it was haeun. you would be saying you didnt feel lonely. you felt that your heart shattered. he just pushed you to the side. you still had the letter in your hand. you gained the courage to go to them.

you put the letter on his table as he faced you. " haeun wanted to give you this letter last time but i couldn't find time with you so here it is " you said smiling trying not to cry.

" y/n wait lets hang ou- "

" sorry ji im going back home im not feeling well " you said cutting his sentence as you walked back to your seat to get your bag and telling minho to inform your teacher that you went home as you exiting the classroom.

this was the third day. the third day since you've been crying non stop. since you gave him haeun's letter. he probably doesnt care about me. he's probably together with her now. you thought

you took out your diary. you wrote all your happiest and saddest memories in there. including the days you went home alone.

' dear diary,

well its the third day now. my heart still hurts. why am i so weak. i should be happy for him if they're together. but why am i not? why didn't i confess earlier. i cant let him go or i cant catch him - '

the bell rang. stopping you from writing as you made it through your apartment. opening the door to see him. your eyes widened. your tears threatening to fall any sooner. your glossy eyes staring at his big eyes.

" ji- "

" stop y/n. why? why are you not going to school. why didnt you answered my texts. why? am i a bad friend " jisung said as his tears realised from his eyes. guilt. was what you felt. you made him cry.

" i- had to " you said as you looked down.

" what? " jisung said with a confused face.

" you spent too much time with haeun jisung. i went home alone. when was the last time we did out movie night. you won't probably remember. your probably together with her now. getting a letter of love is every guys dream and you got it from her. she's everyone ideal type. probably yours too. but why jisung? why? i can't let go or i can't catch you. i love you so much jisung but it's better for us not to see each other anymore. sorry. " you said as you sobbed. covering your face with both hands, not wanting to see his reaction.

you moved back, wanting to close the door. am i finally letting him go? you thought as you closed to door but instead felt a hand on your wrist. you looked up to see his red eyes looking directly into your soul.

" y/n. what makes you think im together with her, when the person i love is in front of me " he said smiling to you holding your small hands in his.

he leaned in closer to you. your heart beating faster. his soft lips on yours. your eyes widened. you closed your eyes enjoying the kiss. he pulled away from the kiss putting his forehead on yours. looking at you sweetly.

" the letter was from my aunt who i haven't seen for very long. as for haeun, she's my cousin but she was scared to give the letter directly to me cause she didnt want to give the letter to the wrong person. but she remembers you from the pictures i had in my album. i hanged out with her so much was to get advice on how to confess to you. y/n i love you more than you think i do. i love you as if your my world. out of the billion people in this world i choose you. your my light. im sorry for making you go back alone. ditching our movie night- "

" ji i love you "

[sweatytyrantwhispers]

Part 4 of things my friends do that make me love them even more:

- both rachel and cristine are artistically talented and i cant fucking wait to see them become famous doing the things they love (i know theyll becoem famous i believe in them tht much) (rachel has a great singing voice; cristine has a great singing voice, knows how to play various intstruments, loves acting, and can paint/draw amazingly)

-seth tells me some catchphraes his fav youtubers say whenever we talk

-none of my friends (nor I) knows how to react or what to say most of the time, especially when it comes to gift giving and compliments; we’re all oblivious and awkward people that don’t understand society

-andy messes up on what to say to customer service people when its evening/night time cus we usually go out around tht time but he’s used to sauing have a good day

-andy also hates intersections so he’ll pretend hes walking in the other direction (away frm the intersection), stand on the sidewalk and pretend hes doing something, or take a whole other route if theres a car nearing the intersection bc he says it feels awkward

-rachel’s favorite animals are dogs and raccoons so when i send her a post abt raccoons she gets rly excited and says she wants to hv a raccoon as a pet when she grows up. She also gets excited when i point out a dog to her in public (she cant see it cus no glasses but still excited by its genert presence)

-dina is scared of lightning so I always try to ask her if shes alright when theres a thunderstorm

-when we go to the park, rachel almost always tries to make tiktoks. We always end up interrupting and annoying her while she makes them though, sorta like our little routine.

-last time we went to the park, rachel ended up accidentally hitting meng and I directly on the face with the volleyball (its ok though cause im pretty sure we’ve ended up accidentally hitting each other with the ball at least once)

-when i got hit with the ball dina asked me if i was ok but as she moved towards me she went for the ball (we were playing monkey in the middle and she was one of the monkeys); its just funny and i love that our friendship is at a point where we could laugh about it and everything is fine

-i told my friends that i was depressed before going to the park to hang out w them. when i got there i kinda just sat on the ground looking through reddit with music on high. they all tried their best to talk to me and tell me funny stories (they said they overheard a group of kids talking about how they pantsed another dude) to cheer me up. Dina and Rachel both decided to give me a hug at the same time and i toppled over. Dina gave me a hug again. I love them so much

- Andy called me while i was in class to tel me to look at the sunset. Its something that both of us have done a few times because we both love sunsets and usually see them when we’re out. Its a small thing but it makes me love my friends even more.

-I was on voice call with Rachel on discord and she laughed then sent the group chat a link to a tiktok

-(not my friend but my mom) She knows that i hate it when things are thrown out when they’re still good or can still be repurposed. Someone brought flowers home for some reason (i forgot why) but she was putting the flowers in a vase one day. Some of the flowers broke off the bigger portion of the stem and couldn’t be put into the big vase but she put a bunch of them into a small container for me and gave it to me. I loved it even though we did hv to throw it out like a few weeks later.

-My friends and I were at Central Park and we were waiting for my two friends to finish up taking pictures. Meng and I were taking a short nap (him sitting down w his elbows on his legs and me w my head on his shoulder) while we waited. We also shared my earbuds to listen to my music. I was p sleepy so I was on the verge of sleeping my also sorta aware of what was going on (mainly cus we were guarding our stuff while everyone else was taking pictures elsewhere). I was doing that thing you do when you’re nodding your head while trying to stay awake/go to sleep. I kept on doing that until he eventually sat up a bit more and pushed my head onto his shoulder better

-Samir looked at a shirt with george washington on it and confidently said that was benjamin franklin

-Dina was talking about how she kept on eating shrimo and peanuts even though she has a mild allergy to it. Rachel and I were telling her to stop and tht we’re not bringing it to the picnic on sunday cus we dont want her dying. She responded, very confidently, tht she “hasnt died before”

-Samir calls dina “d-money”

-Rachel gave me a hug as an im sorry for taking so long. (I genuinely didnt care cus even tho they do take a long time i still v much love them)

-Rachel takes tiktoks and videos of us while we’re out

-Rachel and Dina both got v the excited when i wore a skirt out today because I usually dress more masculine

-A few weeks ago (i think) my friends and I were at the park. I was trying to do something to meng and tripped and fell on the park ground (the part where there’s basically a bunch of tiny rocks on/in the floor). Meng was also trying to do that thing where two people hold a person’s arms and legs and swing them back and forth with me but forgot that if you take someones legs off the floor with no one else holding my arms, i would fall head first onto the park ground, which i did. Both times I laughed at myself but everyone rushed to me while laughing. Idk why but it made me feel like I was ok and safe, even if i was in so much pain, srsly i couldve had a concussion.

- Rachel and I both got excited bc we both wanted to got to the same college

-I call andy when im walking home by myself at night (or when the route im taking doesn’t necessarily hv a lot of people of lights) and he just vibes with me (sometimes talks to me abt how i should b home) until i get home safely

-idk if i already put this but Andy and I have a safe word when we think there might be someone behind us following us at night bc one time when walking home we thought tht and used our now safe word to see if there was someone

-Rachel and Dina do this thing where they take their hand and go from the side of someone else’s body (where the arms are) to the bottom of their legs rly fast while theyre walking. They call it “full body stroke”. They shared it w me and now we do it to meng almost every time we go out. Sometimes we do it together (one person per side).

-While at Central Park there was a dude that was singing (he was rly good). He started singing “Lean on me” by Bill Withers and my friends started singing along with him.

-Rachel sent me a tiktok knowing full well that itd make me gay panic bc yk ✨w o m e n✨

-Dina, Alan, and I stayed out after everyone else went home cus yk they were tired. Dina and I decided to talk like white girls/pick me girls the rest of the night with their stereotypical voices. We laughed the entire time and created weird storylines including: Jessica (Dina), Olivia (me), Jayden (Jessica’s boyfriend and brother that created on Jessica with me and Nicole), Nicole (Jessica’s friend), Olivia’s dad (a convicted felon in all 50 states and is dead), Jessica’s dad (a lawyer that’s also running for president, and Alan (he was just roped into our bs and was there to act like the dude that we both wanted to have as our bf).

- When we were in the bathroom and washing our hands, Dina waited until after the other woman in the bathroom to leave before coming up to me and, in a discreet whisper, told me that the soap was what “good pussy sounds like”

- Rachel, Dina, and I saw a few cats on our way to meet up with Alan and we played w the cats for a bit before one of them said “pspspspsp come here alan” to one of the cats. We now do this frequently to each other even though we hate it.

- We have corrupted each other to the point where we cannot hang out without someone saying “that’s what she said”, something about Dina being white, “just like this dick”, and “deez nuts”. We laugh about it a lot

- Rachel and I are both reasonably out of energy both mentally and physically after our jobs so when I walked w her to a mall w the rest of her friends, we both walked silently with a bit of catching up cause we both understood how the other felt

-We had a water balloon fight today at work (Alan, Rachel, and I work together). Obviously, I took the chance to pop as many balloons over rachel’s head and dump water on her. She tried to spray me w water using a water gun though. Afterwards gave the towel i brought to rachel cause she needed it to change. It’s important to note that rachel has purple hair right now and that the towel was white. key word: was. The towel was now stained a light purple (I dont mind but damn)

- i made rachel a purple raccoon by crocheting it (purple and pink actually). I finished it yesterday (sunday) and gave it today to her at work (monday). I opened the door a bit and peeked my head in with the raccoon just below me in my hands. She was confused at first but then saw the raccoon and her eyes lit up. It was rly cute🥰🥺 to see her get excited. We both nicknamed the raccoon “pimp jr.” and i made a lil name tag/from to tag that said it.

- rachel likes to lip-sync to music shes either listening to or hears in store and sometimes does a little dance with it. Its so cute and I love looking at her do it because it reminds me of why I adore her. She also goes hard when it comes to singing at karaoke. Like damn her vocal range is astounding

- dina got so excited when i asked her if she wanted to binge watch all the twilight movies with me. She looked so cute cus its one of her favorite movies. ugh i love my friends.

-a lot of dudes have crushes on rachel and dina and the both of them usually just try their best to avoid the person or avoid confronting them. Idk why but it kinda makes me feel grateful that I’m close friends with them because I used to have a crush on both of them before when we first met. When I told them i used to have crushes on them they didn’t act weird about it or anything and we continued to be friends. I’m so fucking grateful I’m their friend despite my initial crush on them cause they’re two of them most amazing people I’ve met my entire life.

-rachel, meng, alan, and I went to go watch Shang Chi in movies. In the last few scenes (which were v tense btw) rachel nd I both got rly anxious and squeezed each others hands bc we were scared out favorite characters were gonna get hurt. She squeezed the fuck out of my hand to the point where I couldn’t feel it anymore and neither could she. I’m ok with that though cus I’m glad she finds comfort in squeezing the living fuck out of my hands.

-dina, rachel, and I have matching bracelets from hot topic and i see them wear it almost every time we hang out. Alan and I have a matching pair too but I dont think he’s going to wear it very much (issok tho).

-We went to karaoke yesterday and I dont know how I just realized this but while she’s singing, dina likes to move around a lot. It’s not exactly dancing but not particularly just moving around. Its kinda like that tiny thing ppl do when they’re alone and playing their favorite songs on blast. She’s so cute when she does it, esp because she seems so happy when she does it. Even though I absolutely despise Justin Bieber, I would play his songs over and over again on blast if it made her as happy as she has made me.

-dina and I like to go to the swings and blast “Happier Than Ever” with earbuds in (we share a pair for this) and she screams along to it for the second half

-it’s become a “tradition” for us to go to the swings (most of time) after we’ve done the initial things we already planned out because dina and I love the swings.