#like one tag you can follow that just has art of a specific duo/trio or group is great

[dragon0va]

I get the feeling a lot of hermitcraft fans aren't huge fans of duo/trio/group names so let me explain to y'all how that came about!

I really think it started with The SMP That Shall Not Be Named. With a fandom largely on Twitter (that has character limits) it's not great to be writing out everyone's names all the time. So hence the object duo/trio and group names.

Now you guys are probably gonna say what about names like "smalletho". For that specific fandom that shifted too close to irl shipping territory.

It's also just a lot easier to write out something like RGB Trio than it is to write Ranboo, Sneegsnag, and Charlie Slimesicle.

Duo names also aren't always object duo/trio but it's the most common. A great example of a hermitcraft duo name is The Ranchers. Everyone knows you're talking about Jimmy and Tango. The same thing with Soup Group, everyone knows you're talking about Impulse, Gem, and Pearl.

[devilishdewitt]

The 2019 Moscow Burlesque Festival

Oh my.

First things first, the most important part of any review I shall ever write:

~The Eternal Disclaimer~

It is hereby declared that this little nook of the world wide web shall be devoted to the praise & critique of the art of Burlesque, specifically in Russia.

Let it also be known that I am first and foremost a benevolent force, and every single criticism is documented solely for the purpose of evolution, growth and inspiration, darling.

Never forget - it is fantastic that the burlesque scene in Russia has grown so much in the last few years. Brava, ladies! As a fact and a statement, it is absolutely fabulous.

However, I volunteer to wear the heavy crown of expertise, having seen many a show in many a place, and having a keen eye for detail and a heart hungry for that wow factor.

I always come with an open heart, am quite easily entertained, and know how hard the craft is - I can overlook many a fault when there’s stage presence, charisma and that fire of passion.

Oh, and self-irony.

All is sickly without self-irony.

Now, onwards! To fabulousness!

The Moscow Burlesque Festival is an annual event that began in 2018.

It is organised by Lyalya Bezhetskaya, a legend of Russian burlesque (it is widely acknowledged that she is responsible for bringing the genre into Russia in 2006, after studying in London) and Alexandra (Leela) Zharkaya, who is a director and a writer.

The theme of the 2019 festival was “History of Burlesque/Feminine Sexuality through history”, 1899-2019.

The organisers have announced that they wish to move away from the usual classic structure of a festival in favour of a more theatrical approach - have a storyline, not just a succession of acts.

The place of action was the fabulous Moscow Hippodrome, specifically it’s “Astoria” restaurant.

My story shall be divided into three parts, beginning with

HEAVEN

What was great about this event?

First of all, THE VENUE. It was simply sumptuous. Everything, from the name to the location, every single interior (apart from the bathrooms, perhaps, but that is of little importance) was oozing with promise of glamour.

The stage was of an inspiring size and seemed quite well-equipped for such a performance. The waiters were an absolute delight - the uniforms and hair-styles were at times more exciting than those of the performers, and their kind and slightly sly attitudes made the prolonged waiting time fly by.

THE GATHERING OF THE GUESTS was also done well. The welcome hall featured a small number of stands (soft, simple, almost minimal lingerie, gorgeous accessories and a variety of headpieces). Though scaling down from last years bazaar, it was still dainty and delightful. The display of curious dresses proved to be a fruitful topic of conversation, and the champagne pyramid was a lovely touch.

THE LECTURE about the history of lingerie was superb - I could listen to Megan Virtanen all day long. It was truly splendidly educational and entertaining in the most classy, intellectual way.

It was quite curious to see the performers roam freely during the guest arrivals. To see their immaculate costumes up close…what a treat! Lyalya Bezhetskaya, mistress of the evening, looked particularly breathtaking, and her dignified opening speech was full of poise and class.

Also worth mentioning are the illustrations for the festival - the logo & the set of postcards are absolutely brilliant. The style of drawing is very elegant, and every single lady from those postcards is an inspiration!

Kitty Orlova’s Jazz Band accompanied all acts 1899 to 1959, and goodness me were they spectacular. The idea itself is absolutely genius and was executed with charming efficiency. Excellent musicians!

The Marshmallows, a retro-style singing trio responsible for the music break, are a gift to this world and to Moscow in particular. Impeccable singing, impeccable style, impeccable attitude. The dancers (The Jiving Rockets) that graced the stage during their performance moved with such ease, joy and class…that whole performance was a dream come true for this little retro snob.

As for the performances, I have my own holy trinity of divinity.

Katerina Sahara, Tamasinushka & Xana Martin.

Katerina was responsible for bringing the 30’s to life, and oh dear God it was extraordinary. To be quite frank, dear reader, it was everything I ever want to see in a classical burlesque act. Who knew that the goddess of twerk would embody a thirties diva with such ease? She did it like a natural - from the mood through the tight curl of her hair and to those eyebrows (which are very hard to pull off, darling). Brava, immaculate.

You might remember my main critique of Tamasinushka - self-indulgence without a shade of irony, a confidence that turns sour. Boy did she prove me wrong! Something clicked for her that night and the results were breathtaking. Could not take my eyes off her - she uncovered a tenderness and fragility that immediately elevated her to greatness. Appearing in the end of the show, she was The Ultimate Embodiment of Burlesque, one might suspect? (as you might understand, dear reader, it was not quite clear). Whatever she was, she was a feast for the eyes.

Xana Martin was a stand-out for me last year, and I couldn’t wait to see what she would do this year. She did not disappoint! Representing the 90’s, she brought her own fire and gorgeous skills and married them beautifully with the aesthetic. Queen of the Night indeed! You can see that she LIVES on stage, and that passion is contagious. Electrifying performer!

However, we do also have....

LIMBO

Regretfully, there was a bit of tension before the start of the show.

As guests were taking their places in the main auditorium, they were informed that a deposit must paid for the services of the restaurant. That is in every way to be expected and all tickets did specify that this will be the case.

However, an exact sum was demanded - and it was the same as the ticket price.

Many people have expressed their surprise and inability to pay the full sum (it was a slightly-higher-than-average price tag for most table seats).

It was Lyalya herself who came to speak to each confused customer, and once again, her grace and poise were on point.

However, the situation progressed and Ms Bezhetskaya appeared on stage, and began to address the issue without the aid of a microphone. The speech was a perfect example of passive-aggressive, we even got a treat of a threat - “the festival will not begin until everyone has paid some sum of money. Or shall we all just cancel it right now?”.

The situation had to be addressed, of course - but not by Lyalya.  A Queen must have her loyal subjects - her mastery lies also in the ability to delegate, to wisely guide and trust. Unfortunately, this incident brought the mood down (which could’ve been resolved with a good warm-up!) and it seemed to stiffen Lyalya herself up - somehow all her numbers seemed impeccably rehearsed, but rather lifeless. And I don’t mean in an ethereal, dreamingly detached way - unfortunately, I mean in a distracted way.

Also, let me tell you about a lady that I find to be incredibly captivating -

 Kitty Orlova.

She is a vision and a titanic talent, but her presence went somewhat amiss.

She had two acts in the very beginning of the show, singing and undressing.

The first was the opening song explaining the premise of the story, the second one was her being a museum statue that comes to life.

Orlova is star material, but it feels as if she wasn’t given a chance to shine.

I couldn’t help but wonder, why is she in a creative union with Bezhetskaya? I’m not sure it does her justice.

The story that was chosen for the narrative of this event was a clear echo of last year - Lyalya’s fiancee comes to see her perform, is shocked by the fact that she’s undressing and breaks the engagement. She answers by cursing  him - I mean, literally casting a curse - he shall fall helplessly in love with performing beauties only to be ignored by them.

The curse will last a 100 years.

Which leads us straight to….

HELL

How did Zharkaya & Bezhetskaya, the infamous duo, sabotage a nearly foolproof idea?

I’m afraid that style plays a crucial part here. Style, or lack of thereof.

However, style is an extremely touchy and subjective topic, so I shall begin with more objective points.

1) Lack of proper introduction, aka NO WARM-UP.

If you are a seasoned admirer of the art of the tease, dear reader - or, in fact, if you’ve been to a single proper Burlesque show - actually, to any live performance of anything ever — you know that the relationship between audience & performer is crucial. In Burlesque this connection is especially vital, as a good cheer elevates both the (perhaps somewhat awkward) spectator and the performer (who by their nature crave reaction, it is their stage fuel).  

So when the audience at this so-called festival received NO warm-up whatsoever, what followed? Awkward silences. I heard and saw a few single enthusiasts let out an occasional cheer-and-clap, but they were met with icy stares of misunderstanding from the frozen, confused crowd.

2) No act introduction.

I find this especially surprising, since Miss Lyalya herself specifies on her Facebook page that amongst the things of outmost importance to her is the way she’s announced. “The right presentation creates the required, necessary aura around any performer, but especially - the Queen of Burlesque”. (She does specify that the title has a tinge of irony, even though it did not shine through on this particular night).

The ladies simply appeared on stage, accompanied by change of background projection and a scene with the male protagonist (the cursed one).

In the very end, the actor did attempt to introduce each performer, but was drowned out by the music…clearly the sound engineer was as confused as most attendees.

As there was no programme, the only way to find out who you saw on stage was either to come up and ask or use the internet.

Both are bearable, but still - the fact that there was no proper announcement is simply disrespectful.

3) Every story told through male presence.

The actor (Maxim Loginov) was on stage most of the time.

What was he doing? Ogling.

Ogling.

Honestly, for what purpose?

This is 2019, ladies. Surely the story of feminine sexuality can be told without the aid of a male protagonist.

Perhaps if it were done more tastefully, it would work better, but here it simply looked clumsy.

Which naturally leads us to the two main problems.

First of all, it was not a festival, and not a burlesque one, either.

Was it a show? Of course!

But clearly the premise of creation was not that of a festival - which is perfectly fine, just don’t call it a festival, darling!

There is a reason why the classic approach became a classic - because it works!

A festival is a showcase of talent, a wider view on a topic that unites those who might feel the need to be in opposition. It’s a place of connection, expansion and exchange.

And this grudge-holding/envy-drinking/unhealthy competition air in the community is not doing any one any favours.

Furthermore, most of the acts had nothing to do with Burlesque.

Pregnant tribal dance by Armata Hari? Captivating! But what’s it got to do with Burlesque?

Attitude walking and whip-handling by Fetish Mari? Juicy! What’s it got to do with Burlesque?

Half-naked & lazing around high on a hazy stage? My Tuesday morning, honey, but what’s it got to do with Burlesque? (and what a waste of the playful genius that is KittenTits McGee!)

Prancing around in your own space-age fantasy? Well, why not, but what’s it got to do with Burlesque?

Expert blade skills by Tamara Skarzhinsky? Breathtaking! But what’s it got to do with Burlesque?

Mia Zarring, a sumptuous DJ? Fantastic!  But what’s it got to do with Burlesque?

Can this show exist? Of course it can!

If it were simply “the exploration of female sexuality on stage, 1899-2019”, it would be a completely different story. A variety of genres would be welcomed!

But what’s the point of calling an event “The Moscow Burlesque Festival” and not giving Burlesque itself enough attention?

However, even that is not the biggest issue I had with the event.

I’m afraid that he ultimate description for this creation would be two words.

Tone. Deaf.

The line between vulgar and vivacious in Burlesque is a tricky thing, but it does exist.

It was simply quite poorly written, and some creative decisions were plainly crass.

From the aforementioned man (the actor is perfectly fine, it’s the circumstances he was put in and the way he was directed that’s problematic), a white Josephine Baker number (with the talents of the brilliant Ellisha Fox completely misused. He is surely NOT an accessory to Leela’s cold dancing), to Lyalya’s army number which shocked me quite horribly. War as entertainment? Throwing a grenade at the audience? I understand the playful, metaphorical subtext that was, perhaps, (hopefully!) intended, but it looked vulgar.

But nothing was as vulgar as the final kiss between producer and director…completely uncalled for, painfully serious, it had the aesthetic value of pretentiously cheap, lifeless porn.

Rueful.

Although, what can you expect from a director who blatantly announces this in her festival promoting video:

“I am an actress of eccentric burlesque. Do you know what eccentric burlesque is? It’s when during my act I will have sex with men...women...leopards...bananas...and so on. Come.”

Needless to say, this crass formula has nothing at all to do with Burlesque.

Oh good Lord, and that poor stage kitten’s styling…for what sins must she suffer so?…

It goes without saying that we should have an array of different styles and approaches, and comparisons are a sickly business. However, a painfully clear parallel comes to mind almost instantly.

While Pavlova declares “Down with the patriarchy” with elegant defiance, Bezhetskaya seems stuck within the limits of her disastrous “School of Burlesque” online series (shockingly vulgar, and not in an exciting, tingly way).

I’m afraid that events like this are the reason why so many people still associate the fine art of Burlesque with vulgarity.  ✶✶

THE FINALE

But there is a solution. In fact, a glorious one.

The creation of a truly splendid festival - in the full sense of the word.

Russia is blessed with an extraordinary kaleidoscope of burlesque enthusiasts.

Unite Pavlova, Gajndr, Shpiller, Bezhetskaya and put on a remarkable feast of talent.

How’s that for a spectacular challenge?