#listen i know i'm technically at uni now but like. that doesn't mean this series isn't exactly what i needed

[kalmeria]

told myself i'd stop taking notes and just watch the episode but it's physically impossible. so here's my thoughts/reactions/liveblogging of the penultimate episode of the gifted graduation (episode 12)

why did nate have security cameras in her home?! (yes this is the thing i wanted to say that made me start this post. yes i have since realized it's probably supot who put it there.)

the fact that they are just. talking to supot. makes him that much scarier. like. he has all the power over everyone so he doesn't even have to watch his back

it's worrying though, doesn't he know that they got the blueprints? why isn't he doing anything?

oh. so that's why. so now the choices are: have a special ability and be a tool, or give it up and be free?

but like. why not destroy the plans for the machine? why keep it? why make someone who resents you keep it?

same thing (i mean about supot being scary bc of being casual) with keeping pom around: supot is so powerful, he doesn't have to worry about getting hurt, and instead of killing people, he reduces them to tools. i hope his arrogance and overconfidence will be his downfall.

so does this mean he really did kill nate..?

pom is such a tragic character wth. he wanted to be a teacher and he got that but he can't actually help his students and he is absolutely powerless

"because in this world that isn't ours, just surviving is a brave act in itself. promise me that we will survive together. every one of us." i got shivers.. give me a moment...

the school is spreading a virus by putting it into the water so drink this mineral water instead... is an. interesting concept for product placement (also don't talk to me it's a scene with ohm and punn and i'm still emotional about toddblack in today's not me episode. "i want what's good for you too." oof)

they are studying together i can't. and the things claire said. and when ohm started crying. and they brought up pom's wallet. i can't.

asdjfkahsjkdfhassdfds

i was already getting emotional before they cut to wave and pang and then they started talking about their futures and i was so damn happy because it's just what i was hoping would happen, wave not worrying about being used or dragged down and then pang just went and asked him just that and wave admitted like yeah of course you're not a genius like me but i don't care anymore i'm not scared of being used because i trust you and i don't feel like you're dragging me down because being with you is important to me!!!!! of course he didn't say these things out loud that's not the point! yall this character development is the best thing ever and is making me so happy (and the music in this scene is so soft!!)

i don't like how supot is just. taking away people's free will. i know this sounds obvious but i wanted to say it. can't people do bad things on their own accord? (or decide not to do them i guess also)

i do kind of like the You Got Your Revenge, Now What? thing though

the way pom telling chanon to survive echoes the message pang recorded...

(even thought after that he did tell chanon it's time to get to work. but then it's still in connection to the message bc they are fighting bc the kids no longer can)

damn grace is so cool

!!!!mon talking about how just because she needs to take injections every day doesn't make her life less in some way!!!!! the problem is not with having to take the meds, it's that supot controls their access to it in order to manipulate them, which is the most fucked up thing if you ask me

why are they still surprised when korn says he hates his potential? how do they still not understand it?

they are graduating! and the future is theirs! and korn finally gets to sleep! this is making me so emotional you wouldn't believe

no but for real. i'm so happy for korn. i'm so happy for him. after years of no rest, no break, no escape, no peace, he finally gets to just sleep.

"this is not a prediction because i am the future" what a queen honestly

and she's telling the dude with a god complex that he's literally just some guy. wow

the future vs the guy who controls the present. this is so good!!! this series is so good!! i doubt anyone will read this who hasn't seen it but just in case, let me tell you: this series is good. check it out.

bc that's what it's all been about. different generations. growing up, finding your voice, making the world a place where all of you can live the life you want in. but you don't exist in a vacuum, you have those who came before you and the world they built. you can build on it or destroy it or become part of it. and it's the same over and over again, each generation. the ones before you have the things the ones before them left. and so having a character who is the future is such a fun way to talk directly about this.

ohm!!!!!

yess call out the present on it's bs!!!!

pom and chanon recreating the audio is just what grace was talking about!!!! supot is just the person who discovered it, nothing more.

this is so gooooood

i was going back and forth about whether i should watch the last episode today or not, but partially bc i ended up liveblogging this) i think i'll try to follow korn's example and value sleep a bit more. so tomorrow is the end of the journey- or rather, the beginning of the future?

okay time for the reaction reaction (aka additional thoughts i had rereading this):

pom is not actually powerless! supot might believe that he holds the present in the palm of his hand, but he is just human, and every moment he is not controlling someone is an opportunity for that person to act against him. just like what yuth told him.

i like how they are going heavy on the "pang is not a savior" thing. even his message (which i'm not actually sure where it fits chronologically but it's shown here) was more about... not exactly accepting. about enduring. surviving. it might seem like some kind of acceptance and giving up but it's not, not really. but meanwhile. all the others are going through with their plan, and i don't know how much of that pang is in on but it doesn't change the fact that he is not the one executing the plan. it's good.

[streetlight11]

Dystopia pt 7

Summary: You were an Amity born. You were taught to value kindness and harmony. But you also valued bravery and knowledge. After the test to see which faction best suited you, you were given the choice to either stay in your faction or leave. When you chose to leave your faction for another, your whole life changed and you wondered if it was the right decision. You pondered over it at first, all until you met him.

Theme: Divergent au, strangers to lovers

Genre: mild action [I tried], angst, fluff, slowburn

Warnings: mentions of shark attack, zombie-ish theme, spiders, mild swearing and blood

WC: 3.9k

Pairing: Trainer!Jungkook x Initiate!FemReader

Tips:  In this whole series, Y/N is a few years younger than JK. Those who were initiates like Y/N that just ended the Choosing Ceremony, are all the same age. None of these characters portray who the mentioned people are in real life whatsoever! It's just a fictional character!

a/n: Hellooo! I'm back! I'm so sorry for making you guys wait but work and uni's been a little hectic for me and it will only get busier in the days to come. I can say though that this series is coming to an end so do look out for the next part. In the meantime, here's part 7!

~~~

You had a week left before the final test. All of you including those Dauntless borns were nervous for the final test mainly because it will determine who stays in Dauntless and who doesn't. Technically, they would add up the total scores by seeing how you handle your fear simulations during the final stage and taking your last updated ranking during your Stage One that was the physical training.

Despite your rank being third, you didn’t want to get too ahead of yourself knowing things might take a huge turn when you least expect it. Nevertheless, with Jungkook’s help on how to go through each of your simulations like a true Dauntless, you believe you wouldn’t have much of a problem during the final stage itself.

It was another day of Stage Two and for some reason, Kihyun asked to swap one of the initiates from his team for San, a Dauntless born who was in your group. Jungkook simply agreed to it, not really thinking much of it. That wasn’t until you saw just who Kihyun walked into the room with.

Oh fucking great.

Yeonjun smirks the minute he sees you seated on the bench in between Lisa and Kevin. You rolled your eyes thickly at him before you heard Jungkook speak up, directing his words to Kihyun specifically.

“And you only decided to make this swap now because…?”

“I figured you can monitor his choices better during each simulation. Plus, he might easily be in the top 5 for the final test.” Kihyun smiled but there was an underlying meaning to it that you couldn't really pin your finger on.

You watched with eagle eyes as Yeonjun took a seat on the bench, directly opposite from you. The minute Kihyun left with San, your eyes travelled back to Yeonjun who had his right eyebrow raised mockingly at you while he pressed the tip of his tongue against his inner cheek.

“Alright, listen up. For today’s simulation, we’re going to conquer new fears. I will be creating new simulations for each of you. Everyone’s simulation will be different from the others, to see your agility and brainworks. Haknyeon, you’re up first.” Jungkook announced as he re-entered the second room before Haknyeon followed behind him.

A few minutes went by, you were just talking to Lisa about some random things when Yeonjun’s voice called for you.

“I wonder how slow you take to finish each simulation considering you’re barely just the looks with not much of a brain.” He said as you glared at him, your shoes ready to be flinged right onto that sharp nose of his.

“Do you ever shut up? I swear you’re like a walking nightmare in the flesh.” You snorted in annoyance, totally not surprised by how unfazed he was.

“Oh come on, loser… Did you really think you could beat me at my own high score? I’m going to win a spot in the Top 5 and I’m gonna make sure you end up Factionless.” Yeonjun said with so much hatred in his voice. You assumed he was still royally pissed about being kicked out of the third rank only to fall 5 ranks lower. Not only that, his rank was taken by you, his number one enemy.

Of course he held a grudge on you.

“Don’t talk all big and cocky when you blatantly lost your ranking to someone as neutral as me. Good luck with that final test, scumbag.” You said proudly, knowing that would definitely get him on edge.

He has always been tormenting you in every possible way and you were so done with it. Yeonjun scowled as he got up intimidatingly, squaring up to you with his chest puffed out and his head nodding at you slightly to hopefully make you feel small and weak. However, you weren’t going to give in to him just yet.

“You really know how to piss people off, don’t you?” Yeonjun asks, his voice deep.

With that, you smirked up at him to add more fuel to the fire even though you knew you shouldn’t. Maybe testing his patience was the next thing you should add to your portfolio, under ‘Strengths’.

“Looks like there’s only one person on my list and that's you. So enjoy while it lasts.”

“You fucking-”

Unfortunately, right before he could continue, the door to the room where Jungkook and Haknyeon was previously in, swung open abruptly.

The two males stepped out and were met with Yeonjun’s hands grabbing onto your collar. Jungkook’s piercing gaze hardened on the boy’s grip on you before his eyes flickered up to Yeonjun’s fiery ones which soon grew soft for a split second. Yeonjun pulls away from you as he takes a big step backwards while the room is dead silent.

“You... Get in here. Now.” Jungkook said firmly while he pointed his index finger towards the boy and soon beckoned him over. The moment the two males were in the confined room, you let out a heavy sigh. Of course, you were sick and tired of having to see Yeonjun’s face everyday and have him coming at you at every single opportunity he sees.

Minutes went by, you were growing sleepy by the second and was just about to doze off when the second last initiate had just left the smaller room. Leaving you being the only one left in the waiting room like always. You didn’t have to be called to know that Jungkook was inside that small room, probably waiting for you to move your sleepy ass into that room with him.

Once inside, you closed the door behind you and made your way to him who was just typing something away in the high tech looking computer. “Sit down.” He said gently, eyes still fixed on the screen. You did as you were told, sneaking a glance to the screen to see what he was doing.

Just then, he snapped his head towards you with a lift of his eyebrow.

“Can’t keep your eyes to yourself?” He teased and you could clearly hear it in the tone of his voice.

“Not until you tell me what horrible scenario you have created for me.” You tried to pry the information out but he seems stubborn. Or more like stern.

“If I tell you then it wouldn’t be as thrilling now would it?”

You rolled your eyes but the smile on your lips betrayed you and Jungkook saw that. He couldn’t help but chuckle as he swapped the empty serum capsule in the syringe for a new one. He holds your neck in one hand while the other holds onto the device and soon injects you with it. Your eyes squeezed shut from the slight prick before the serum began to do its work.

It took you less than 5 seconds to be completely out, letting the serum take over your brain.

Instead of waking up in a dark room with no windows or doors like you usually did, you found yourself in the middle of the ocean just stranded with no sign of potential help anywhere. You tried to stay afloat as you looked around to see where you could swim to. The sun was about to set in the horizon, your mind was running 100 miles per hour trying to figure out how a Dauntless would go through this simulation.

Typically, you would just let yourself drown since all this wasn’t real but Jungkook has been teaching you how to solve these tests like a Dauntless. So you don’t want his efforts to go to waste.

Right when you were about to start swimming, a sharp clamp down on your right calf made you scream as you felt your whole body get dragged underwater. A rush of water began to fill your lungs fast from the sudden drown. You struggled to free yourself as you were slowly going deeper and deeper below the surface. You looked down and that’s when you saw just what was holding onto your leg.

A great white shark.

With that being said, you grabbed onto the fin to pull yourself closer to it as you began to kick its eye. At the speed it was swimming, the water current was making it hard for your other leg to swing at its eyes. However, after a few tries and your gradually building force, you managed to jab its eye with the heel of your boot.

It immediately lets go of your leg and swam away, with blood oozing out of its eye socket. You however, were equally bleeding with a small chunk of flesh bitten off. You forced yourself to propel your body upwards back onto the surface.

You were starting to grow lethargic and unconscious from the lack of energy, only hoping you could make it in time. The moment your head popped back out onto the surface, the situation around you changed. It was now a room. A very, very familiar room that you’ve seen all your life.

It was your room.

You carefully walked around your room, feeling nostalgic about it. Just then, a loud thump coming from your closet made you jump. You quickly grabbed the closest item to you which was a metal rod that was randomly sitting in the corner of your drawer.

With careful steps, you made your way to the closet while holding the metal rod out front to put a space between yourself and whatever it was.

The closer you got, the louder the thumping sound was.

What you would’ve thought was probably just a scared animal that got lost wandering around your old faction considering you lived in the forest basically, got pushed down hill when you heard a low snarl that sounded too much like a human for it to be an animal. With a heavy heart, you grabbed onto the closet handle and pulled it open.

To your surprise, you saw what it was that was growling in your closet. Or more specifically, who it was.

Your brother.

“Tae?” You whispered as you watched his eyes slowly look towards you from behind your hanging clothes. His eyes were red with streaks of black on the whites of his pupils. His skin was peeling. Popping black veins covered his face and neck down.

You whispered his name again as you took slow steps backwards so as to not startle him. Suddenly, your brother launched at you with such a speed that was unmatched with yours. A yelp left your lips as you fell backwards onto the ground. He hovered over you, teeth trying to chomp down on your face.

You used all the strength you had to put a barrier between you and him by firmly pressing your hands onto his shoulders.

“Tae! Taehyung please!” You begged as you turned your head to the side to avoid his bites when you noticed a revolver gun sitting just a few feet from you at the foot of your bed. With one deep breath, you elbowed your brother in the face and roughly shoved him over your head using your feet. Once he landed with a harsh thud, you quickly crawled to the gun and took it, clicking the hammer to lock the bullets in place.

Right before your brother could leap at you again, you whispered while aiming the gun straight at his head, “I love you, Tae.” With that being said, you pulled the trigger, closing your eyes as you heard the gunshot fill your ears. Your body shuddered when you heard the sound of a body colliding with the floor.

You carefully opened your eyes only to be met with a small storage room. Right when you were about to reach for the door handle, cobwebs began to shoot out from either side of the walls. Eventually, covering the entire door in a thick layer of cobwebs so that you couldn’t escape.

Just when you thought you could easily grab the handle, thousands of spiders began to crawl out from the keyhole and the gaps between the door and the doorframe.

You knew this was just a simulation but it still made your whole body shiver. This was a fear you could never and would never imagine getting over with that easily. The sight was unbearable but you had to get out of there.

“Think Y/N! Think! What would a Dauntless do?”

You looked around to try and see if there’s something you could use. Upon turning to your right, a split fire log was just sitting at the corner of the shelves. You rummaged the shelves desperately despite the spiders crawling around and occasionally climbing onto your arms.

You could feel the tickling sensation of its small hairy legs crawling up your arm as you would brush them off every once in a while.

After what felt like hours, you finally found a matchbox with just one stick left.

“Please work…” You whispered to yourself as you brought the matchstick to one end of the box which has the sandpaper attached to it. With one swift flick, fire lit up the matchstick, leaving you happy. By quickly bringing the flame to the fire log, the log catches fire easily. You carefully brought it to the door as you held it near where the handle was located. Once the cobwebs have slowly started to melt away, revealing the handle, you quickly grabbed it and tried to pull it open.

It took you four rough tugs before it could open. The moment the door swings open, you quickly run out of the confined space. Your breathing started to calm down a little as you brought your head up to look at your surroundings.

You were back at the Dauntless Training Room. Except this time, you were standing on the starting line of the knife throwing range with everyone around you. The only thing that stood out was the target. No, it wasn’t Yeonjun sadly. No, it wasn’t any of your friends. No.

It was Jungkook.

“No…” You whispered as Yoongi spoke up from beside you.

“You know what you have to do.”

With that, you turned back to Jungkook with a deep frown on your face. Although your conscience knows this was just a simulation and that this wasn’t real, you knew you had to carry on with it no matter who was in the way. Your mind was too caught up that you didn’t even notice the blade that was placed in your right hand. The minute you felt the cold metal touch your skin, you looked down at it and then to Yoongi.

He simply nods his head towards Jungkook before he directs his words to you, “Don’t miss.”

With that being said, you slowly turned back to Jungkook who was begging you not to do it. His voice was desperate, weak and it breaks you. You had to keep telling yourself that this wasn’t real and it was all just a simulation.

You could almost feel yourself crashing down until you took a deep breath and whispered as softly as you could while you locked eyes with that Jungkook sim.

“You’re not real.”

In a heartbeat, you closed your eyes shut before you threw the blade as accurately as you could and when you heard the sound of metal slicing through something with a loud crack, your heart stopped for a split second. You carefully opened your eyes and you saw the blade that you threw, etched right in between his eyebrows with blood trickling down the bridge of his nose.

That's when you jolted awake, cold sweat coating your entire face. Your heart was pounding against your chest as you didn’t realize you were tearing. Just then, you felt a warm hand on your back, startling you.

“Woah, hey, you okay?”

Your eyes met Jungkook’s soft round ones as he asked you that in pure concern. After about a solid minute of you trying to stabilize your breathing, you finally looked at him to ask, “Why… Why did you make that simulator?”

Jungkook stares at you for a while before he answers your question.

“Sometimes, the government puts your loved ones or the people you cared for into these simulators to see how you deal with it… I only put my sim in there because I knew you’d still do it anyway since you knew it wasn’t real.”

The room fell quiet as you slowly nodded to acknowledge his words. You watched him type something into the computer before he spoke up again.

“It’s almost dinner. Are you gonna go back to your dorm or are you going straight to the cafeteria?”

“Probably straight.”

“Should we go together then?” He asks as he turns to look at you with a small smile appearing on his lips. You couldn’t resist that adorable grin so of course you agreed to it.

A few minutes later, you were both making your way to the cafeteria, occasionally greeting the other Dauntless members who happened to walk by you and Jungkook. Most of them acknowledged Jungkook but not you, not a surprise. While walking with him, your mind suddenly drifted back to that one simulator of your brother. You haven’t seen him or your parents since the Visiting Day two weeks ago.

You missed them dearly every day, but you never really had the thought of going to see them. However, now that you are a few days away from the final test, you thought maybe it’s the right time to see them again. Well, maybe just your parents since you might get detained if they saw a Dauntless member just casually strolling in Erudite’s territory.

With this thought in mind, you brought the idea into light by turning to Jungkook and revealing your plan.

“Hey, I was thinking of seeing my parents the day before the final test. Do you wanna come with me? I mean, if you’re not too busy of course.” You offered, only to see him smile.

“Are you sure you’re not planning to ditch the final test?” Jungkook teased as you giggled.

“And let Yeonjun take my place in the ranks? No way.” At that being said, Jungkook had to stifle a laugh. You entered the cafeteria and were just a few feet away from where your friends were seated.

“Sure, I’ll meet you at the rooftop after lunch.” Jungkook said as he whispered into your ear right before he gently placed a hand on your back and pushed you softly towards the empty space beside Gahyeon. This caught the eyes of those around you, making you pinch Jungkook’s side in a way of scolding him.

The minute you sat down, Gahyeon smirked at you cheekily while her eyes travelled to Jungkook’s back.

“Mmm, what was that missy? Scoring a date already with your hot team lead?” She teased as Hyunjae wiggled his eyebrows at you.

Just then, your eyes naturally fell on Yunho who was sitting beside Hyunjae and all you saw was soft eyes staring back at you with a smile but you could see the pain that lingers in it. Of course Yunho didn’t blame you for not returning his feelings but who was he to deny the little heartbreak of seeing you with someone who makes you happy, which isn’t him?

He just wasn’t the kind to be petty over something small like a crush.

“Shut up, I’m not dating Jungkook.” You said firmly, reaching for the beef patty across the table to assemble your burger when Hyunjae smirks at you.

“Not yet.”

With that being said, you threw a piece of cheese slice to his face. Earning laughs from your other friends, including Yunho.

It was the day before your final test, both you and Jungkook managed to sneak out after lunch to meet at the rooftop a few hours ago. And now, here you are seated in the living room of your old home. It’s been a while since you came back to Amity land, bitter memories of Yoohyeon cutting ties with you came flashing back the minute you reached the end of the woods that leads you straight to your houses’ back door.

You were chatting with your parents, telling them about tomorrow’s final stage. What you had been doing and what you had to do tomorrow. You also told them what happens after the final test, which ranks are assigned to what jobs, all those kinds of stuff.

You were so engrossed in the catch up, you seemed to have lost track of time until Jungkook reminded you it was time to head back to your faction.

With a heavy heart, you bid your parents goodbye, telling them you would be back every once in a while.

After you and Jungkook managed to catch the train that brings you back to the city, you two slid down against the doors side by side. You were glad that he came along with you. It was something you were grateful for but could never seem to tell him verbally. However, despite the lack of words, Jungkook seems to understand you even without having to ask you to speak up.

Because the minute you gently placed your head down on his shoulder for support, you could’ve sworn you felt him kiss the top of your head silently without uttering a single word.

Your eyes lingered on your fingers that were tangled with each other on your lap.

It was always nerve wracking for you to make any first move, and it still is. However, for some reason, you felt slightly braver today. Maybe because you were able to be this close to him without eagle eyes everywhere in your radius. Maybe because you’ve grown a close bond with him unexpectedly. Maybe because he was there to guide you when you were at your lowest. Maybe because he makes you feel safe. Maybe because he makes you feel loved.

Maybe that’s why.

That’s why you carefully began to move your hand over to his, that wasn’t resting on top of his bent knee. Gently sliding your hand under his forearm, only to brush your fingers along his palm until he moved his own to lace his fingers with yours.

This was enough to make your heart skip a few beats, feeling him caress the back of your hand softly with his thumb.

He was your safe haven. And you were his.

A few hours went by, Jungkook and you had parted ways right before dinner when you both arrived back at the facility after your little trip back to Amity. It was already past the sleep curfew for the initiates including yourself. Jungkook was needed at a meeting that night with the rest of the team leads. Yoongi was briefing them for the final test tomorrow, what needs to be done and the whole procedure.

Jungkook took note of the process, keeping in mind what he should prepare and what he was supposed to do.

After they were dismissed, all of them began to make their way back to their respective rest places except for Yoongi and a few of the Dauntless leaders. Jungkook and Changkyun were just walking past The Pit on the third level when a very pale looking boy came rushing to them while he pointed behind him. Immediately, Changkyun recognized who he was.

“Yunho? What are you doing out this late? You should be resting for tomorrow.” Changkyun said with a frown but the frantic boy could only grip onto Jungkook and Changkyun’s forearms desperately while his eyes stormed back and forth between the two.

“You have to come now! It’s an emergency!” Yunho explained briefly.

“What happened? What emergency?” Jungkook asked, not feeling so good about this situation. However, what comes out of the boy’s mouth next, rendered Jungkook speechless.

“It’s... Y/N.”

~~~

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a/n: lemme know if you wanna be tagged in the future parts! ❤️

Taglist: @moonchild1 @danyxthirstae01 @helenazbmrskai @jenna-posts @pimentelssmile