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#lmao imagine being cool with your kid walking three blocks to your home in the dark even though theyre a minor and very small🤣
just-call-mefr1es · 5 months
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me when my dad is actually okay with the thought of me walking home from the party when it’s completely dark outside
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metalrequiem · 4 years
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having trouble remembering what type is strong against what? look no further!
its always easier to remember things when you know WHY, wouldn’t you agree? so here’s my method of remembering the type advantages, just for you. i do so hope it helps :)
bug > grass : this is the reason why your tomato plant never gives you more than two tomatoes come harvest time.
bug > dark : one time, when i was like six or something, i was wandering around the college my dad worked at (as the head of the it department) with him because he had to do something in one of the tech closets. it was just wires and computers super disorganized; ran the network or something idk i was six. anyway the floor was like, black when we opened the door, but then when he turned on the light it turned fucking white as the carpet of roaches just fucking scattered. i forgot where i was going with this.
bug > psychic : bugs are one of the three most common fears. this will come up again. guess how many times.
dark > ghost : ghost summoning is dark magic (think warlocks). considering they’re the one who summoned it, the dark sorcerer would obviously be more powerful than the ghost.
dark > psychic : once again; dark is one of the most common fears.
dragon > dragon : trust nobody, not even yourself.
electric > flying : the only thing worse than being zapped and paralyzed is being zapped and paralyzed 20 feet up in the air.
electric > water : i mean, this one’s pretty obvious. water + electricity = bad time. (actually, fun fact, distilled water doesn’t conduct electricity - it’s the stuff typically in the water that makes it conductive. i think.)
fairy > fighting : wizards are just inherently more powerful than fighters, i guess. keep that in mind next time you play 5e.
fairy > dark : My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Season 1; Episodes 1 & 2
fairy > dragon : i’m pretty sure this was the reason they made fairy type a thing in the first place? anyway, the knight slaying the dragon to save the princess is like, THE classic fairy tale trope.
fighting > dark : so google tells me that this is a good vs evil thing, where dark is “fighting dirty” (which makes sense considering the moves like nasty plot, sucker punch, etc), and the advantage is that fighting dirty doesn’t mean you’ll win, it actually means you’re more likely to lose. or whatever. fighters are better than rogues is the explanation, actually.
fighting > normal : go ask a black belt to fist fight you. i dare you.
fighting > ice : strong man punch through ice block.
fighting > rock : strong man punch through rock.
fighting > steel : [visibly distressed] s... strong... strong man punch through... steel???
fire > bug : you know how a bunch of kids have that weird part of their lives where they think using a magnifying glass to set a bug on fire with the power of the sun is the neatest shit?
fire > grass : i mean, duh. the more specific example that usually comes to mind for me though is wildfires in like, the savannah. or australia.
fire > ice : fire melts ice. i seen’t it with my own two eyes.
fire > steel : jet fuel can, in fact, melt steel beams.
flying > bug : i mean, bugs do compose most birds’ diets. except for the bearded vulture. that motherfucker eats bones.
flying > fighting : have you ever tried to punch a bird out of the sky?
flying > grass : i guess cause, like, birds live in grass? and they use it to make up their nests? like this type advantage comes entirely from intimidation factor. “i live inside the remnants of your second cousin,” and all that.
ghost > ghost : in basically all ghost related lore/mythology, while they struggle to interact with the corporeal plane, ghosts can interact with other ethereal beings/objects just fine. i guess that extends to beating the shit out of each other.
ghost > psychic : finally, the third of the 3 most common fears.
grass > ground : plants literally grow out of the fucking ground.
grass > rock : saw a dandelion growing out of a crack in the pavement on my walk today. effervescent.
grass > water : water is one of the two required molecules (reactants, kinda? ish?) for photosynthesis. this was a really complicated way of saying plants go glug glug.
ground > electric : ground is a bad conductor. its much easier to punch someone when their powers are completely useless.
ground > fire : throwing dirt is a pretty good way of putting out a fire, actually. it suffocates it, and since fire needs oxygen to burn,,,
ground > poison : rub some dirt on it. also i heard once that if you put dirt/sand/whatever on a wound with poison (like a bite i guess?), it’ll soak some of it up or out or something. its not a solution, but it  would buy you some time i guess. please don’t test whether this is true or not.
ground > rock : honestly? i got nothing. rock come from ground. dust to dust. there.
ground > steel : for one, steel is derived from ground stuff. that seems important? you could look at it from like, a natural vs artificial scenario. like, no matter how invincible we think something we build is, the earth will outlast it and reclaim itself eventually.
ice > dragon : the classic dragon breathes fire, and dragons are generally accepted to be reptiles (which are cold-blooded), so if a dragon’s body temperature fell too low, it’d be a massively crippling blow.
ice > flying : i’m pretty sure that birds can fly if it’s too cold? i mean, it makes sense. you know how it gets harder to feel and control your fingers when it’s cold? i imagine that’d be pretty disastrous for a bird’s wings while it’s trying to fly.
ice > grass : this is another kinda common knowledge one. most types of plants don’t do well in cold weather.
ice > ground : i don’t know exactly how to articulate it, but my head is screaming the word “PERMAFROST” at me repeatedly, so let’s go with that.
poison > fairy : poison is a pretty common weapon of choice for fairy tale villains? like, snow white instantly comes to mind. the princess bride, too. in older stories, there’s, like, the witches in macbeth.
poison > grass : so at its core, this is “poisoning nature”, which could go any number of ways, really, but i think specifically of pollution. there’s no joke for this one. eat the rich.
psychic > fighting : “brains over brawn”. everyone knows this one, lmao.
psychic > poison : i mean, there’s that trope where the protag just wills their way through being poisoned. more realistically, some cultures believe meditation can expel poison/impurities from your body. which is where the idea for the pop culture trope came from in the first place?
rock > bug : do you know that scene in d*sney’s hunchback, sorta in the beginning, where frollo is giving phoebus his absolutely batshit monologue about his plans for genocide and he lifts up a stone to show all the ants under it to visually prove his point about a hideout somewhere in the city and then he flips is and crushes them all to really drive that point home and phoebus is like “with all due respect, jesus fucking christ sir”? yeah.
rock > fire : recall the “put out a fire by suffocating it” thing. rocks work too. i guess.
rock > flying : let’s go throw rocks at birds!
rock > ice : ice melts, but rock is forever. (honestly, i personally think the advantage should actually be the other way around because when water gets in even the smallest crack and freezes, it expands and makes the crack even bigger, rinse and repeat. but there’s nothing i can really do about that lmao).
steel > fairy : y’know, the whole “knight in shining armor” bit. we’ve been over this.
steel > ice : you know what happens if you freeze a sword? you get a cold sword (ignore the fact that it gets brittle - that’s future you’s problem). you know what happens if you hit an ice block really hard with a sword? you wind up with more distinct pieces of ice than when you started.
steel > rock : i guess rock is just. more brittle than steel? weaker? less versatile? who fucking knows.
water > fire : ._.
water > ground : mudd....
water > rock : erosion! don’t think about it too hard.
normal > nothing : that’s the fucking point.
BONUS: the no effect matchups!
normal/fighting X ghost : go punch a ghost.
ghost X normal : go get punched by a ghost.
poison X steel : i mean, this makes sense. steel is the only wholly artificial pokemon type, so it wouldn’t be affected by having something nasty thrown at it. unless it’s salazzle. in which case, fuck you.
ground X flying : can’t get hurt by an earthquake if you’re in the sky. this is where i’d put that meme if i wasn’t too lazy to go find it.
electric X ground : grounded things can’t be electrocuted! or something like that. i don’t know. i told you, my dad’s the it guy.
psychic X dark : so, i actually think about this a lot. think about common fears. the one thing they all have in common is they’re linked with the unknown, somehow. like, basically all fears boil down to the fear of the unknown. people fear animals and bugs because they don’t know what they’re capable of doing to them, or what’ll happen to them if they DO do something to them. people fear drugs/alcohol (like me) because they don’t know what they’ll do or what they’re capable of doing with less self-control. so, that’s cool and all, i hear you say, but what about the fears typed in pokemon? well, ok, bugs. that’s the easiest of the three: you can just research them?? lmao go google that beetle, you’ll be fine. yeah, you’ll still be scared of the ones that you now KNOW can hurt you, but you can psych yourself up and away from that, really. or just avoid them. when it comes to ghosts, it can go one of two ways: either you can explain away whatever it is sparked the fear at that moment in the first place and calm yourself by believing they aren’t real, or you can just accept that, hey, that was a ghost, and coexist with it. chill with the ghost. offer it some cheez its. so again, you can will your way past that fear. the problem with the dark, though, is that it’s essentially the purest form of the “unknown” you can get while also keeping it physical rather than conceptual. if you’re in a dark room, or a dark forest, or the basement with a single, flickering, bulb, you can’t will that fear away. you either fear the dark, or you’re lucky enough to not. there is no way to know whether you’re alone or not. there is nothing to research, nothing to explain. there’s nothing but you, your mind, and the suffocating blackness. in this situation, really, your mind isn’t on your side anymore (again, assuming you have a fear of the dark), so how can you be expected to do anything against it?
dragon X fairy : and they all lived happily ever after :)
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