#love without hypocisy

[kingdomoftheheavens]

I will now, in my own heart, become a hypocrite because others in authority say I should.  I must overlook the continued existence of a justified grudge another believer holds against me and return to ordinary service in the church.  But I will not cover up my hypocrisy.  I hereby declare my hypocrisy openly.  My reckless words have seriously wounded a much younger sister in Christ whom I, in fact, love.  The wound is so deep that, in spite of my best efforts to seek reconciliation, she will likely never forgive me.  I’m old.  I don’t have much longer to be in this world. So, I have the permanent and unwashable guilt, in this world, at least, of placing what may become a long lifetime of bitterness—and all the tortures that go with it—on a much younger sister whom I love. This is a very heavy burden for me. And  I still think this disqualifies me from most service in the church. I nevertheless must serve,