#majorine x reader

[he4rts4alexis]

Your something else

Pairing: Majorine x Reader

Warings: profanity if u bat an eye

{sfw + requested}

"Maj were gonna be late" you say impatiently looking at your phone. "I have to finish my blue eyeshadow" she says looking at her pink vanity.

You always loved the way her eyeshadow matched with anything she wore, it was like her signature.

"just because I love your eyeshadow we can wait" you say giving her a warm smile.

*Time skip 20 minutes later*

"Hey fellas" Majorine says as she gives a wide smile

"Y/n you didn't say you were gonna bring your manly girlfriend" Cartman says laughing at his own joke "well they did fatty" Majorine says obviously irritated. "Cartman shut the fuck up here y'all can sit right here" he pats down on the spot next to him and Stan. "So what's been going on anybody.." you say awkwardly. "I want to burn down the farm" Stan says while looking through the big window. "The prince and princess of Canada came back" Kyle says rolling his eyes. At this point the food has came. "You gonna eat that?" Cartman asked. "No I'm gonna save it for my pet rat" "you have a pet rat!?" Cartman asked "No dumbass I was being sarcastic I thought you off all people knew" "ugh fatass" Cartman groaned. "Surprising words coming from your mouth" "shut the fuck up you wanna be bodybuilder bitch" Cartman hissed. Maj leaned over the table to do a clean punch on Cartman's face and then walked over to him and whispered something in his ear. I don't know what Majorine whispered in his ear but whatever it was had him so shaken up he ran out of the food place. "Damn Majorine that was foul" Kyle says laughing. "Welp what can I say she something else" you say give her a kiss on her forehead

I know this is short but bare with me I spent twenty minutes looking at the request confused on what to write🥲 The only reason I didn't say what Majorine whispered is because I don't know what she would whisper for Cartman to run

[phantompanties]

🔞MINORS DNI🔞

And They Were Roomates

Summary: It's your senior year at New World University, and there's been some changes to the dorms since you went home for your summer break. As such, roommate plans have been rearranged, and you were to meet your new one today. Imagine your shock when the man who walked through the door was your tormentor for most of your life here...

Relationship: Eustass kidd x Fem!reader

Tags: modern au, college au, Kidd is a bully, sexual tension, hatefucking, cunnilingus, vaginal sex, name calling, rough sex, creampie, brat taming if you squint, Kidd catches feelings at the end

Length: nearly 3k words

The lock of your dormitory door clicked as you twisted the key, granting you access. When you were welcomed by a dark entryway, you realized your mysterious new roommate wasn’t here yet. No matter, you didn’t mind being here first.

Due to a complication with the system, you were unable to find out who your roommate for this semester was going to be. It truthfully made you a little nervous, as your last roommate was a total sweetheart named Koala, a political science major who dabbled in martial arts. The two of you became fast friends during the previous few semesters, but alas, life wasn't so kind this time around. Starting fresh wasn’t bad though. You at least hoped that your new roommate would be just as nice as Koala. You pulled your luggage into one of the two small bedrooms allotted to you. You found it a little strange that there were two bedrooms, as you were used to the same single-room dorms you and Koala shared, but it wasn’t unwelcome. It felt like a luxury to actually have some privacy. When you were finished, you looked around the common area. It was very cramped, only having room for a loveseat and an itty bitty coffee table across from the small TV mounted to the wall, but again, it was far bigger than the dorms you were used to. You were actually kind of excited!

Of course, that excitement was interrupted by the door swinging wide open, and your heart sank when a familiar broom of red hair ducked through the frame.

When his amber eyes caught sight of you, his whole face soured. “No fuckin’ way. You!?”

Oh sweet merciful lord, NO. Eustass Kidd!? Your mysterious roommate is the biggest pain in your ass since you enrolled!? He’s done nothing but bully you around like a middle schooler every time the two of you had a class! This bastard was the number one reason you were so happy to go home for the summer every year!

You swallowed your shock and disdain, attempting to figuratively be the bigger person. “I… wasn’t expecting this…”

“Yeah, well neither was I!” he spits, his Scottish accent thick in his speech. “I have the bloody misfortune of rooming with this fuckin’ twat!”

“Excuse me!?” you bark. “How dare you!?”

“Ya heard me, bird. I can’t fuckin stand bein’ around yer prissy arse.”

“Prissy!?” you exclaim. “Well excuse me for actually caring about my appearance! You always look like you just rolled out of bed!”

“It’s called bein’ punk, ya dafty.” He shoots back. “That’s the bloody point.”

“I’ve seen punks that take better care of their appearance than you! Not to mention the stench every time I have the misfortune of being near you. If you’re gonna live here, at least take a fucking shower every day!”

“Oh, that’s rich comin’ from the twat that reeks like she bathes in a tub o’ perfume every mornin’! How many bottles do ya go through a week? I can smell ya from three rooms over!”

“It’s a nice smell and I hardly use that much!” you shoot back. “Maybe if you stopped huffing engine fumes all goddamn day you’d be able to appreciate it.”

“Hah!” he barks out a laugh. “At least I’m usin’ my time for somethin’ useful! Aren’t you majorin’ somethin’ bloody useless? Like English?”

“I’m a Communications major, dumbass. Big difference.”

“Aye, whatever. Don’t get yer knickers in a twist.” Kidd huffs, throwing his prosthetic arm up and dragging his luggage to his bedroom. Thank god the two of you at least had separate rooms…

When he returned from his room, he pointed at you. “We’re gonna have tae lay down some ground rules, bird. Coz if I’m stuck roomin’ with ya, I want my life to at least be a little tolerable.”

“I should be saying that…” you huff, crossing your arms.

“One, keep yer bleedin’ trap shut. I hate listenin’ to ya yap enough as it is.”

“You can’t just tell me to be quiet, asshole!” you argue. “That isn’t fair!”

“Life ain’t fair, ninny. Two, stay the fuck away from my room. If I catch a whiff of yer stench on any of my shit, there’ll be hell to pay.”

“That goes the same for you.” you agree.

Kidd snorts. “Three, you’ll let me bring over whoever the hell I want and ya won’t say a damn thing about it. That includes whoever I feel like shaggin’ that night.”

“Oh great, I get to listen to you disappoint your lovers in real-time. Is it my birthday?” you snark.

“Oy! Don’t be callin’ me some one-pump-chump, bird. You’d be surprised to know how many hoors I got blowin’ my phone up every day.”

“I didn’t call you a one-pump-chump,” you say with a smirk. “You’re telling on yourself.”

Kidd choked on air, and you felt like you could dance in victory. You actually got one on him! This is a high you’ll be riding for the rest of your life!

“Right, now listen here, ya cheeky cunt.” Kidd, growls, getting in your face and poking you in the chest with his prosthetic hand. “Don’t be thinkin’ that just coz ya made a little joke that yer above me. I guarantee that I can have ya shakin’ and screamin’ my name all night.”

“Looks like I struck a nerve,” you say, still smirking and looking up at his fiery eyes. “But I don’t believe your empty lies, Kidd. sorry.”

“Oh, it’s not a lie, bird…” Kidd growls, lifting your chin with his metal finger. “It’s a promise.”

Something about the way he said that sent electricity shooting down your belly and into your groin. Fuck, you hated this bastard, but the way his bright eyes were boring into you so hungrily made you wanna squeeze your thighs together.

“What do ya say, bird? Ya want a ride with the Eustass Kidd? The way yer lookin’ at me, I’d say yes…”

“Don’t call yourself “the” Eustass Kidd like you’re some kind of celebrity, dumbass.” you snarked.

“Oy, do somethin’ about that mouth o’ yours or I’m gonna do it for ye,” he growled, gripping your jaw and squishing your cheeks.

“Do it, you won’t,” you whispered, challenging him.

Kidd smashed his ruby-painted lips into yours then, groaning in a way that made your core throb. He moved his hands down to your ass, squeezing with both his flesh and prosthetic hands. Your hands travelled up his broad chest, hooking around his thick neck. When his tongue licked your greedy lips, you opened them, permitting him to shove it down your throat. The air became heated as the two of you clicked your teeth together, rubbing and grinding your bodies in an intense display of raw lust.

You squeaked as his rough hands picked you up like you weighed nothing, wrapping your legs around his torso. He smirked into your lips as he carried you to his bed.

Once there, he threw you into his sheets, not even waiting for you to settle out the first couple of bounces before he went and attacked your pretty lips again. He could feel that his lipstick was smudged all over both of your mouths, but he didn’t give a fuck. You tasted too fucking good, and he wanted more.

He disconnected your lips for a moment, smirking at the translucent string of saliva that connected your tongues. He removed his faded band tee, revealing his thick, muscled body scarred from years of reckless street fighting. He went in to tug your shirt off next, groaning in your ear. “Let me see that fuckin’ body of yours, bird.”

You gasped breathlessly, helping him remove your blouse and bra. When your chest was bare, he licked his lips approvingly. “Been wantin’ to see these pretty tits since I met ya.”

“Yeah, I bet, pervert.” you snark.

Growling, Kidd dove into your neck, biting and licking while he pinched your nipples in his warm flesh hand, rolling and tugging between his fingers. You bit your lip, holding in your moans.

“Ah, ah, don’t be doin’ that birdie. Let me hear how much ya love it,” he smirked against your skin.

“Y-you’ll have to do better than that, Useless Mid.” you challenge. “You aren’t getting shit from me.”

“Oh, the little prissy miss has a spine, eh? Very well.” you shivered when he looked you dead in the eyes. The look he was giving you was downright predatory.

In a swift motion, KIdd tugged down your sweats and panties at the same time, revealing your glistening folds. You looked away from his face then, embarrassed.

“Aww, are you gettin’ shy on me, bird? Where’s your cheeky jokes?”

“Sh-shut the fuck up…” you mumble, still not looking in his eyes.

“Don’t tell me you’re a virgin, love. Surely you’ve shagged at least a few times with this body of yours.”

“I-I don’t think that’s any of your business!” you gasp at him.

“I’m right ain’t I?” he grins.

“No, you’re not!” you shout, covering your face in annoyance. “I’m just not used to it being like this!”

“Ah, but you like it, don’t ya, bird? Yer as wet as a drowned rat.”

“Shut up…”

“I bet your minge tastes just as sweet as your mouth, birdie. I’m gonna give ya the face ride o’ yer fuckin’ life.”

“Stop talking and do it already you- hnnHHAAHH!”

You couldn’t contain your moan when Kidd’s rough tongue licked a stripe up your sopping folds, and he chuckled. “There it is. Keep making those sounds, pretty girl.”

You hated to admit this, but this was probably the best head you’ve gotten in your life. Kidd drank from you greedily like you were a water fountain and he was dying of thirst. The way his lips latched around your clit and the sounds of him slurping from your dripping hole were enough to make you go crazy. Your hand found his mess of scarlet red hair, tugging him further into your aching pussy as you ground it on his face. Kidd couldn’t contain his moans and the vibrations shocked your clit deliciously.

“Mmmhf… yer close, ain’t ya, bird?” he groans against your hole as he slurps. “Mmmngh… yer twitchin’ on me face. C’mon, then. Cum on my tongue ya dirty cunt. Y’know ya want tae.”

You gripped his hair harder with one hand and covered your mouth with the other, letting out a loud moan as your orgasm ripped through. Kidd moaned into your pussy as he lapped up your delicious cream.

While you were lying there, twitching with aftershocks, Kidd admired the new bright red pair of lipstick panties he left on your cute pussy. He wished his phone was closer to the bed so he could take a picture for his wank bank. Oh well, he had a good memory anyway.

“Sh-shit…” you gasped. “Oh fuck…”

“Mmmh, that don’t sound like disappointment to me, birdie,” Kidd smirks, leaning in front of your face.

“S-so what? You may be good with your mouth, but it doesn’t change the fact you’re a one-pump-chump…”

“You’re losin’ yer edge, lass. You don’t sound like ya mean that anymore.”

“Shut up, asshole.” you spat, although still breathless. “I’m not changing my mind.”

“Well, then I’ll just have to make ya, then.” he chuckles.

Kidd momentarily stepped off the bed to remove his belts and pants, revealing a sizable tent in his boxers. You swallowed in anticipation, a little nervous.

Kidd made a show of revealing his cock, and by god, Kidd was a large man, and that thing was proportional. Your eyes widened in both hunger and a little bit of fear and he laughed.

“Ya like what ya see, birdie?” he asks, stroking it slowly.

“It’s… bigger than I expected…” you whimper.

This seemed to stroke Kidd’s ego exponentially because he gave a low growl. “That’s right, bird. And every last inch is gonna fill ya right up.”

He knelt back on the bed, pulling your hips forward and slowly rubbing his cock up and down your pussy.

“Ah yeah, you’re nice n’ wet for me, ya dirty girl. It should slide in no problem.”

“W-will it fit…?” you gulp.

You saw Kidd’s cock twitch at that. “Careful, bird. You’re askin’ for me to break the bed when ya talk like that.”

Kidd lined himself with your drooling hole, slowly pushing himself inside. He threw his head back as your gummy walls fluttered around the intrusion.

“Fuck…” he moans. “So hot… so tight…”

You gripped the sheets as he slid further into your walls, nearly bumping your cervix with his blunt tip.

“Shit… yer like a bloody vice on my cock, birdie…” he groans, biting his lip.

“You’re just too fucking big!” you whine.

“Yeah, but you love it,” he says, leaning down and smirking in your face. “Yer hips are movin’ on their own, love. Ya want me to rail ya senseless, don’tcha? Ya want me to ruin other guys for ya? I’ll give ya what ya want, birdie. I’ll make you addicted to my cock.”

“Nnghf… shut up and fuck me!” you snap.

Kid grinned wildly, diving into your neck and slowly pulling out, then slamming back in. he gave a few harsh thrusts before he set a brutal pace, fucking you like a man possessed. It wasn’t a stretch to say he was, your pussy just felt that fucking good.

You whined, scrambling to find his neck for purchase. God the feeling of him stretching you was heavenly. You couldn’t help but rake your nails across his shoulders. Kidd leaned back from your neck, admiring the deep bite marks he left as he pounded you. Now Kidd was in there deep, but he felt like he could go deeper. He took his big hands, both flesh and metal, gripping your hips and pulling you even further onto his cock. You gasped, eyes filling with stars as his blunt head kissed against your cervix. “God… I’ve been wanting to fill your cunt for so fuckin’ long… wish I’d done this sooner…!”

“F-fuck! Kidd!” you wail, your fingernails drawing angry red lines in his skin.

Kidd growled, grabbing the back of your thighs and folding you in half. The man had you in a mating press and was pounding into you so hard you were sure you heard the floor creaking. Your eyes rolled back into your head and Kidd chuckled, his eyes darkened with lust.

“I can feel ya gettin’ tighter, love. Ya wanna cum so bad, don’tcha? Yer already creamin’ so good on me. Say ya wanna cum, birdie. Tell me how bad ya want it.”

“F-fuck… fuck you, Kidd…” you whine, screwing your eyes shut.

“You’re already doin’ that birdie. C’mon now, don’t be shy. Tell me ya wanna cum. Beg for it. Fuckin’ scream it.”

“L-let me cum, Kidd, please!” you wail. “I need it! Fuck, please!”

Kidd groaned, cock twitching in your walls. “Good girl.”

His flesh hand travelled between your bodies. And his thumb met your clit, rubbing in tight circles. “Come on… cum on my cock, ya dirty cunt. Let the whole buildin’ know who ya belong to.”

White hot pleasure exploded in your veins, and your gummy walls clamped and fluttered on Kidd’s cock. A ring of white spilled around the base.

“Grrghh-FUCK!!!” Kidd moans, shoving his cock balls deep into you and painting your insides white with his hot sticky cum. He thrust a few times, riding out both of your highs until it got painful with overstimulation. When he was done, he collapsed with his face in your tits, being sure to mind his weight.

“Oh… oh my god…” you pant, mind thoroughly blown.

“Sounds like ya had a good time, birdie,” Kidd whispers in your ear.

You groaned. “A-alright fine… you’re good at sex, I admit it.”

Kidd surprised you by gently kissing your cheek, rolling off you and slipping his soft cock out of you at the same time.

As the two of you calmed down, you glanced at him. “So… you wanted to do that for a while, huh?”

For the first time you think you’ve ever seen, Eustass Kidd flushed bright red. You giggled, stroking your finger down his chest. “Did you spill a big secret?”

“Aye, haud yer wheesht, ya twat…” he grumbled.

“You don’t mean that Kiddy.” you tease. “You wanted me, admit it! How long have you been thinking about this?”

Kidd mumbled something incoherent, and you rolled over on his chest. “Say that again, Kidd. I can't hear you.”

“Fuck’s sake—since that time in class ya smacked the shite outta me for callin’ ya a bimbo.”

You couldn’t contain your snort. “Really? You got hard over a smack?”

Kidd flushed deeper. “I like when bonnies are able tae smack me around… it's a nice challenge…”

“Wow.” you say. “You’re full of surprises.”

“Shut it before I make ya regret openin’ that cheeky mouth o’ yours, bird.”

You snorted, resting your head on his large chest. “For what it’s worth, no one’s ever made me cum so hard in my life. I can barely feel my legs right now…”

Kidd grunted, wrapping his flesh arm around your waist and pulling you closer. “I suppose I can let ya stay here… just for tonight.”

“Oh, how gentlemanly.” you giggle, nuzzling into his large pecs. “Good, because you’re really comfortable.”

Kidd’s cheeks dusted pink. “Whatever, birdie. Just don't drool on me, aye?”

“No promises.” you sigh dreamily.