#mark was a worse boyfriend in tct than oliver was argue with a wall

[transgenderoliverritz]

not to start posting Hot Takes but low-key i do not think oliver was the sole or even main reason mark/oliver as a couple did not and could not happen in the timeline of tct.

oliver is obviously not ready for anything, which is not (believe it or not) his own fault. arguably, he has started working on himself and recovery, but he was sidetracked by the whole. blackwell manipulated him into joining a cult and fucked up his feelings (because he KNEW the book would) so bad that oliver could barely think for himself until later in the series. and this is addressed, actually!! oliver knows what he needs to at least some extent and he's at least gone through the work of building up some support system and recognizing his trauma and needs. we know this.

mark, though. mark, in tct, presents himself as a healthier person. he's allowed to be closed off to oliver about the trauma they don't share because he's getting outside help for it (this is said while he is yelling at oliver for being closed off about the trauma they don't share).

mark's issue is that he views recovery as linear. he's not recovered, nor is he entirely emotionally healthy. he freaks out when he realizes he doesn't know everything about oliver despite trusting him immensely. instead of recognizing the manipulation and abuse oliver is going through, he blames oliver for getting himself into it and not telling anyone. i think this is a direct result of his trauma with damien, because he recognizes himself and he still blames himself for what happened.

i think that, yes, oliver at least needs to have some support established outside of mark before they can do anything. but i think he knows that, and i think the thing no one considers is how much more difficult it is for oliver to find that.

tct was oliver finding help and support. his ability is so far ingrained into his issues that he can't pull off what mark is trying with therapy. and while oliver would benefit from therapy and i think he should at least try to find someone atypical, what he needs more than that is other people. and tct is him finding those people (which is also why beck should apologize for being a dick to him).

but mark is so incredibly close to making the same mistake with oliver that he made with sam. and i don't think he realizes that, except maybe subconsciously, and he pushes oliver away. but i think the reason that this matters a little more is that mark is pushing all the weight on oliver. he thinks he's at a place where he's not the one who needs to put in more work before they do anything.

and because oliver is very likely aware, and mark isn't, mark ends up having to put more work in.

and quite honestly, i think if they both apologized (mark more, because oliver already did) and both just acknowledged the things holding them back. it won't take as long as fans tend to project.

you can in fact be in a relationship while you're still working to heal. which is ultimately why mark is the key piece here.

i don't know if all of this made sense, it's super early. but have a little ship analysis.