#matt bbtl

[withhowsadsteps]

from the dining table - matt fic (bbtl)

I’ve been struggling with my basically chronic pains for days now because of work and standing on my feet for multiple hours but hey! Managed to write something. I’ve been wanting to write more and more but I just literally can’t produce words, or I lack the motivation to do so whenever I have some time to do so. As always, I’m sorry for any mistakes, because, you guessed it, I kind of did not proofread it.

!: So, this is basically an AU – 2020’s without the pandemic and the other shit happening rn. IDK. Also because I’ve been listening to Harry Styles and Måneskin A LOT I imagined Matt’s music being something like the music H and Måneskin put out. Also they are a bit older. Yeah also if you care, I also imagined Matt’s hairstyle to be something like the hairstyle Dean had for the DA MAN -photoshoot, ugh. Especially the first pic…

warnings: mentions of cancer (not anything too specific because I do not have the knowledge to be more specific), umm… idk if there is something else worthy of a mention. angsty.

wordcount: about 2,5k, this is a lengthy one and because of that the ending is a bit sudden, sorry!

I’m sorry, but I think it is better for you to forget me and my love for you. Forget every memory and every feeling. Chase your dreams. Maybe in another life we would’ve been perfect. Be free, go out there. Maybe one day we’ll meet again.

That is all Y/N could type on her phone, her eyes blurred by the tears streaming down her face. She barely sent the text to Matt as her heart broke into million pieces. She knew that she had to do this and as much as it was going to hurt Matt, this was the least painful way to do this. As soon as she could manage to dry her eyes, she deleted all her social media and packed the last things in her room. As shitty as Luton was, she was going to miss it.

Before she hopped in her father’s car, she received a voice message from Matt.

Y/N, baby. Don’t do this to me. Are you home? Let me see you, why are you doing this? Is it someone else? Did I do something? Please.

She could hear his quiet sobs whenever he stopped for a while. She put her phone away and tried to calm herself down. “Are you sure you don’t want to tell him, honey? I’ll drive you to his place if…” Her dad asked softly but he did not even get to finish what he was about to say. Y/N shook her head and turned to look away from her father.

5 years later

For her 24th birthday her friends had a great idea. They knew how much she loved Harry Styles and his music. And that she was from Luton. They figured that when she said “Matt’s music is overrated, and he is not even that good” she just didn’t want to admit that she used to know him and live near him. So, they got them all tickets for his sold-out London gig. None of them knew that Matt and Y/N used to be in love. And that she still was very much in love with him. Y/N was still so deeply in love that she didn’t even dare to listen to any of his songs. Had he written any songs about her? How she left him and how fucked up the way she did it was? Did he write songs about his new lover or lovers? She did not want to move to London the way she had to.

And now here she sat on her bed in her studio, with her two closest friends pacing around her small apartment getting ready. Y/N tried not to be a dick and still jokingly told her friends that this was the shittiest gift they could’ve given her. It was not a complete lie though. What if Matt saw her there? What would happen then? For 5 years she had avoided him. She knew very well that he too moved to London as soon as he got famous, but even after that she hadn’t seen him around. What if Matt asked her questions, would she lie to him? Tell him that she moved because her dad got a job in London? Even then that wouldn’t be a reason to break up, Luton wasn’t that far away. She took a deep breath and got up and changed her black outfit on. She didn’t want to be too noticeable and wanted to melt to the crowd. For obvious reasons.

-

Y/N knew that Matt didn’t make bad music. She knew that she would love anything and everything he would play and sing. His band was good, that wasn’t surprising either. She felt proud to see him up there on the stage. Matt was made for this. But she also felt bittersweet. The concert was nearing its end when Matt took a short break to drink some water and to take a better look at the crowd. Y/N didn’t notice his stare, but he noticed her. He felt like his lungs were going to give up and his breath was taken away for a minute.

“This next song… I wrote this couple of years ago. She was the love of my life. It is her birthday today… I wish her well and I hope that she has a very happy birthday, wherever she is.”

Now it was Y/N’s turn to feel a kind of panic building inside her.

“Y/N/N, do you know who he is talking about?! Girl, how did you not tell us that you share the same birthday with his ex”, her friends laughed and gently pushed her. The song started and Matt’s voice and his words filled her ears, making her burst into tears. That is when something clicked inside her friend’s minds. The rest of the gig went in a blur, rest of the songs going in and out of your ears.

Without her friends, Y/N wouldn’t have been able to navigate her way home. She felt lost. She felt extremely bad. Guilty. Heartbroken, in love. Mad at herself. She had to explain herself to her best friends. Why she didn’t tell them that she loved Matt.

-

Usually Y/N didn’t drink too much alcohol. She didn’t like being drunk and she hated the hangovers she got. But this weekend, she used her birthday as her excuse for drinking until she passed out in her bed. Sunday evening came and she had to stop being reckless and get ready for a day full of classes at her UNI and a shift at a nearby café. She couldn’t help herself. She tried to avoid her phone but now, laying under her sheets, she took her phone in her hands and searched for Matt’s last message for her. The voice message.

Y/N, baby. Don’t do this to me. Are you home? Let me see you, why are you doing this? Is it someone else? Did I do something? Please.

She repeated the message countless times over and over again. Would it be a mistake to send Matt a message? Would that be so horrible?

Matt? I wonder if this is still your number… I’m so sorry. For everything. I know I promised you that I’d be yours forever. I still am, in a way. I still love you. I have not wanted anyone else’s love. But it was the right thing to do. You probably don’t believe me, but M, look what you’ve achieved. With me, I don’t know if you would’ve been able to achieve all this. The song… it broke my heart. I’m so sorry for all the pain I’ve caused you. I’m deeply remorseful. I came there because none of my friends knew about us until that night. I… I don’t know why I’m even typing this. You probably don’t want anything to do with me. But I’m so proud of you. I’m so fucking proud of you, M. You’re doing so well. God. I always knew you’d blow people’s mind off if you ever got the chance to do so. I was right, wasn’t I? I think I’m still somewhat drunk, fuck. I guess I just needed to tell you that I know what I did was awful. I promise I just wanted to save you from more tears. I was pretty sure I would not… You know, I won’t bother you with it. I couldn’t even meet you face to face to say my farewells, because I was too weak. I’ll never stop loving you. I hope your proud of yourself, Matty. I hope you’ve found someone worthy of your love. I wish you all the best, Y/N.

The rest of her day went, again, in a blur. She slept only a couple of hours during the night and woke up early in the morning. Even though she knew this day would exhaust her, she was happy that she had so much to do. No time to think about Matt or the past.

-

Y/N closed the door behind her and turned to lock it. The last hour at the café had been quiet and easy, but nevertheless she couldn’t wait to go home. She wanted to drown her sorrows in the warm water of her bath and then swaddle herself in her blankets.

“Everyone used to ask me why I broke your heart as if I was the one who ended things.”

It took her a few seconds to process the words a familiar voice spat out behind her. She turned around. She looked exhausted; Matt could see that in her face. Y/N couldn’t help herself and think how good he looked in his black leather jacket, his hair a little messy.

“And then after five years, I see you there, looking even more beautiful than before. I couldn’t help but think that you came there just to say fuck you Matt, I’ve found someone much better than you. I did not know that you’d go home and get drunk and then text me, as if you broke up with me a week ago.”

Matt’s words were filled with anger. Y/N didn’t know what to say. She felt small before him, her knees felt weak.

“Well, are you going to explain yourself or did you message me just to remind me again that you left me weeping, huh? Say something!”

Y/N manage to mutter some words out softly and quietly:

“I live nearby… I don’t want to talk about it here”

-

Arriving at her studio, she let Matt in first. He sat down at her small dining table, waiting for her to join him. Y/N slowly let down her backpack and got out a box filled to the brim out of her closet. She sat down before him and with shaky hands opened up the box and went through the papers until she found the few of them she was looking for. She put them down before Matt and took a deep breath. Her hands were still shaking, her breaths becoming a little bit too quick. Matt took the first paper in his hands and started reading him. The color drained from his face. Cancer. “Y/N”

“I’m so sorry Matt, I thought I was dying. I was sure I would not survive, M. I’m surprised I made it this far. We moved to London to be closer to the best hospitals. I wanted to save you from my death, that is why I did what I did, Matty, I’m so sorry.”

She started hysterically sobbing after that. All the guilt she had carried with her until this point just culminated and erupted fully at last. She was so exhausted from her treatments, from the heartbreak and now from school and work.

“I distanced myself from everyone I loved, except from my parents and siblings. I did not want to see others hurt like my family was hurting. I even prepared my own funeral, Matt. It was bad.”

Matt took her hands in his own, trying to calm her nerves. He let her cry until she had no tears left to cry.

“You could’ve told me. I would’ve been there with you, through everything. I can’t believe I wasn’t there to hold your hand when you needed me the most.”

Matt’s voice was so quiet Y/N could barely hear his words.

-

Their relationship wasn’t fixed right away. Y/N still felt way too guilty about her actions. Matt had to process all the information. He had to tour around the UK for a couple of months before they could see each other again. By then, Y/N was able to speak more about the five years they had been apart. It was easier to speak about the illness and the guilt she felt now that they had met once before. Matt felt guilty, too. And more than that he felt deeply sad. But slowly he warmed up again and trusted Y/N with his heart again.

Matt did not need to ask her to be her girlfriend again. One night he took her out to watch the stars and wrapped his arms around her, keeping her close. It led to a lengthy, melancholy, and love-filled kiss and ever since then, he was with her every chance he had to do so.

Y/N felt less stressed about work and her studies when he was with her, keeping an eye on her. Making sure that she was staying healthy, watching her chase her dreams as he had already achieved almost all his. His last dream was to marry the love of his life, but that remained a goal for some time later. But he knew who the love of his life was. He always knew. And so did she.

[mattsredjacket-archive]

Matt + 𝓜𝓸𝓸𝓷 𝓔𝓪𝓻𝓻𝓲𝓷𝓰

[mydemimonde]

‘muse’: ch. 1 | matt (bbtl)

matt x oc fanfic

warnings: none!

a/n: this will obviously be divided in chapters, but idk how many lmao. hope you enjoy!

CHAPTER 1

Luton, 1981.

“Why do you have to leave? Why can’t you stay with us?” he asked, almost crying. His best friend was leaving them for good, they won’t be able to see her again.

“I’m sorry Javed. My dad found a job in Liverpool and we have to move. I don’t want to, but I have to” Mia answered trying to comfort her friend.

“You could stay in my house. My mum would love to have you living with us…” Javed muttered the last words, looking down at his feet.

Mia smiled. He was such a nice guy. “I know she would. I would too. But Liverpool isn’t that far! I could come to visit you in summer” she assured him, looking at the brunette boy next to Javed. “Right, Matt?”

He was surprisingly quiet, which was kind of unusual, since he was the one who talked the most among the three of them. In fact, he hasn’t said a word since Mia broke the news to them.

“How far is it?” Javed was now looking at her, with an expression full of hope.

“I’m not entirely sure, like… 2 hours? 3 hours?”

“3 hours and 36 minutes to be exact” Matt sounded angry. But well, he finally said something. He turned around to go to his house, he couldn’t stand this situation anymore. He was pissed.

“Matt, where are you going?” she grabbed his arm, but he let go of her grip. Mia looked at him, worried. “Matt?”

“Leave me alone” he answered, running to the door.

- - - - - - - 

Luton, six years later.

It’s good to be back Mia thought, looking through the window of the car. The sky was blue with a few clouds, and the breeze was a little bit chilly. She missed this. She missed her hometown.

Her father parked the car outside the house and sighed. “Ladies and gentlemen, we’re back in this hole” Susie punched his arm. “Ouch! Why was that for?”

“Don’t say that. This is your hometown!”

“That doesn’t deny the fact that this city is awful” his wife laughed. “Now, let’s get out things out of this old car” they got out of it and Oliver opened the boot.

“C’mon silly, let’s help mum and dad” her older sister Nellie said and both got out of the car as well. Mia grabbed the box that said ‘Mia’s things – FRAGILE!!’ and put it on the floor, next to the door. Their house was in the same neighbourhood they used to live in six years ago. Everything was the same, and she hoped their old neighbours were still there. Especially two of them.

“The boxes won’t get out of the car themselves” her sister playfully pushed her and laughed.

“Do you think that Javed and Matt are still living here?” Mia asked. Nellie shrugged. “I mean, Javed for sure, we know his family. But Matt?” they grabbed the last two boxes while Susie opened the door and entered.

“Oh, now that’s the real question” she wiggled her eyebrows. Mia furrowed.

“What do you mean?” she grabbed her own box and entered the house.

“Don’t act like you don’t know, don’t play with me” Nellie was carrying her own big box, full of books. “You know exactly what I mean. Mia and Matt sitting in the tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g!” she started to sing and Mia rolled her eyes.

“I was fucking 8 years old!” her mother yelled ‘watch your language’ from the kitchen. “Sorry! I was 8 years old Nellie, my crush on him is part of the past”

“Aha, then why did you blush when I started singing?” Mia rolled her eyes again. She was in love with Matt since they were 8, but never told him. Why though? She was sure he would never return the feelings.

“Girls, your rooms are upstairs. Do you think you’d need help to carry the boxes there?” asked their dad. He was panting from all the heavy boxes he carried from the car to the house.

“Nope, I think we’re good” Mia said, offering his dad her water bottle. Nellie and Mia took their stuff and went upstairs.

“Anyways, are you sure you don’t feel anything for Matt?”

Mia sighed. “I told you, no.”

“What a shame, you two would make a beautiful and annoying couple” Mia gave her a ‘I will kill you’ look and Nellie laughed. “Do you want help to unpack?” sometimes, Nellie can truly be a pain in the ass sometimes, but she’s always willing to help her little sister.

“I’m good Nellie, thank you” she gave her a thumb up and closed her bedroom door. As she started to unpack her things, she began to think. What would Matt and Javed be doing now? Are they still friends? Are they still living in the neighbourhood? Is Matt still obsessed with the idea of being a musician? Is Javed still pursuing his dreams of being a writer?

 - - - - - - - 

After helping her parents unpack and taking a long and relaxing bath, Mia run downstairs and met with her mother, who was baking some cookies. She grabbed a chocolate bar from the cupboard and her denim jacket, decorated with pins and patches of her favourite bands.

“You’re going outside, my love?” asked her mother while putting some frosting on top of the cookies.

“I was about to. Do you need help?” the cookies looked and smelled delicious, like everything her mum baked.

“No sweetie, thank you. Enjoy the walk” Mia smiled and kissed her mum on the cheek. She waved goodbye to his father, who was reading the newspaper and went outside. She expected to see Mr Evans or Mrs Hudson with her triplets, who would be all grown up now.

The little square in the neighbourhood was still the same, the purple swing she loved when little was still there. Some kids were running, others playing and laughing while their parents watched. Memories of her, Matt and Javed playing there came to her mind. She remembered one specific summer day, when there was a big storm coming and they were forbidden to go outside. Still, they managed to sneak out of their houses and went to the park.

Just before the storm started, they were found by their angry and worried parents, who grounded them for almost two weeks. The punishment was not seeing each other for those weeks, and it was a torture for them. They were truly inseparable.

Mia was finishing her chocolate bar when she saw a young man with his Walkman park his bicycle outside his house. She recognized him instantly. There he is she thought. She went after him. “Hey stranger” the teenage got his headphones off and turned around. He frowned and smirked.

“Mia?” he slowly approached her and when she nodded, he embraced her. “I missed you so much! What are you doing here?”

“Well we moved back here” she looked at him. He was now a tall young man, but with a worried expression on his face. She immediately thought about his family’s struggles with job and money.

“Did your dad lose his job?”

“No, no he didn’t, he was transferred back here” she put her hands in her pocket and smiled at him. Such a long time without seeing him.

“That’s so cool! Seriously, we missed you. Look at you, you’re all grown up!”

“You too J! You look like a college student already” they laughed. “How’s your family?”

He shrugged. “It’s getting hard for us to make ends meet, but we’re fine”.

They sat on the curb and talked about what they did in those six years of not seeing each other, about their families, and how Liverpool seemed cooler than Luton.

“I assure you J, it’s a nice city but only because the Beatles were born there” she laughed. They loved the Beatles when they were children, they used to sing Let It Be on rainy days. Mia smiled at the memory and turned to Javed. “J, you and Matt are still friends, right?”

“We are, but I don’t see him much often. He dropped school last year”

“He did what?!” that was strange. Matt was eccentric like his father, but this was another lever of eccentricity.

“He wants to focus on his career as a musician, so he dropped school and now he has a band”

“That’s cool, but how did his father agree to his decision?”

“You know how he is; it didn’t take a lot to convince him. Like father like son” he rolled his eyes and she giggled. “Are you… uhm… still in love with…”

“Nope. It was just a teenage crush, and I haven’t seen him in years”

“Ow. You two would make a lovely couple” he pouted as she punched his arm playfully. A car was being parked in front of Javed’s house, music was playing loud from the speakers. “Oh, look”. A young boy with a mullet and black jacket got out of it, waved goodbye to his friends and made his way to the door of his house as the car drove away. “Matt!” Javed stood up and waved his hand. Mia got on her feet, standing a little nervous next to her friend.

Matt turned and smiled. “’Ello J!” he run to him and gave him a hug. Then he turned to the girl next to Javed, checking her out. “Mind to introduce me to this lovely lady, Javed?” Mia gulped. She didn’t know why she was so nervous.

“You don’t need that; you know her already” Matt frowned. “Oh man, you don’t remember Mia?”

Matt’s eyes were wide open. “What?!” his expression of surprise changed quickly into a happy one. “Mia! Come ‘ere love” he immediately wrapped his arms around her. She returned the hug, shocked.

Oh.

Maybe her feelings for him hasn’t changed. Not one bit.

[britishboystm]

Look How Beautiful- Matt BBTL (18+)

Gif from @mattsredjacket​

Warnings: Smut(18+), unprotected, m on f (f receiving), fluff

A/N: I’ve been gone so long! Anyways hopefully this isn’t awful. I am a tad rusty

>>>

Matt had made you come with him to this party his band had organized. Unlike Matt you were much more reserved and quiet. Parties had never been your thing but since you had met the love of your life at one, you’ve decided to give them a chance. And of course he wanted you to be there and you couldn’t say no to him.

In a corner, away from the chaos, you sat sipping on your non alcoholic cranberry and soda, watching Matt play cards with a couple friends. He looked so happy that you couldn’t help but notice your heart swelling with pure admiration. His laugh boomed through the living room and his gorgeous smile caused your face to flush red like the ripest tomato.

Seeing him like this was why you sacrificed evenings of calm. His happiness radiated when he could socialize with his friends and dance to music. Almost showing as much happiness as when you two went to each other’s houses and laid in bed for hours, laughing at the stupidest shit.

His eyes scan for a moment, most likely looking for you. Once his gaze lands on yours, his smile grows and he throws you a sweet wink before bringing his eyes back to the game in front of him.

Out of the corner of your eye you notice a tall figure walking towards his group. A girl you have never seen before. She plants herself on the couch beside Matt confidently and you can’t help but have your blood boil. He doesn’t notice her but once she leans further into him, pretending to be interested in the hand he was dealt he looks up.

Your stomach begins to hurt as you nervously watch what was unfolding in front of you.

Once they went in for an embrace as though they were old chums, all of the alarms went off in your head. Unable to watch this girl continue to flirt with your boyfriend, you stand up and walk out of the area to find your friends in the backyard. 

“Y/N!” Your friend Y/F/N calls out from the other side of the pool. She looks a little tipsy but at this point you don’t care. You just need any kind of companionship at this point. You quickly walk over, a look of worry and stress evident on your face.

“What’s wrong Y/N?” Y/F/N’s face drops after seeing you look so upset.

“Nothing I’m just not feeling well.”

“Do you need Matt or I to drive you home?” She asks, her tone full of concern.

“No it’s fine, needed some fresh air is all.” You don’t t feel like telling her the whole story. Her eyes then move past your shoulder and a frown appears on her face.

“What?” You ask.

“Nothing.” Her look shifts quickly.

You follow her previous gaze behind you and see Matt and the girl leaning against the house beside the back door. They laugh and laugh and she makes sure to throw in a couple hair flips and a arms graze in the mix.

She is beautiful. Tall and thin and dressed for the runway. You feel out of place and immediately become self conscious about yourself. Of course he would talk to her over hanging out with you, why wouldn’t he?

“Y/N?” Y/F/N pulls you out of your thoughts.

“Mm?” You reply, a tad preoccupied in the brain.

“Is that why you came out here?” You bite your lip and look down at your shoes in shame. You shouldn’t react so strongly to your boyfriend simply talking to another girl, but you just couldn’t help it.

“It doesn’t matter. I’m sure they are just friends.” You say, trying to hide the hurt in your voice.

“Yeah I’m sure.” She says softly giving your shoulder a reassuring rub.

“Could I take you up on that ride?” You ask, unable to hang around the party any longer.

“Yeah sure, don’t you want to say bye to Matt? Let him know you’re leaving?”

“I’ll call him later, I’d rather just go.”

“Okay.” She stops pushing and follows you through the back gate to avoid Matt and the mystery girl.

—-

Once Y/F/N drops you off, you take a shower and get into bed, hoping to forget the day's events. It was hard to do so however with your front door being knocked on.

At first you chose to ignore it, but then quickly remember that your parents were out of town. Begrudgingly you get out of bed and go downstairs to open the door.

“Sorry we don’t need any of you’re-“ you are about to finish your sentence when you finally look up to see a concerned Matt standing on the other side of the door.

“What are you doing here?” You ask genuinely confused.

“Well I thought we were going to yours after the party to spend the night together but I guess you had other plans.” He seems hurt.

“Oh, I forgot.” You reply. You did actually forget. The anger you felt at the party had sent you into a tizzy, unable to recall the plans the two of you had made.

“Would you like me to go home or?” He asks.

“No come on in.” You reply, deciding not hold a grudge against him and enjoy the rest of your evening. Maybe you will bring up the party incident later.

—-

“Want to watch a movie?” he asks, sifting through your vhs’s. You find yourself distracted by his shirtless back as he looks through your collection but also the thoughts you've had for the past few hours.

“Do you think I’m pretty?” You ask out of the blue. He quickly turns around and drops the vhs back on the shelf.

“Why would you ask me that?” He says before walking over to you and scooping you up in his arms for a hug.

“That girl at the party.” He pulls away and looks into your eyes.

“Oh so that’s what this is about.” Everything was starting to make sense to him.

“That’s why you’ve been all quiet and distant.” You look down at your twiddling thumbs.

“Don’t hide your face love.” He says softly, using his index finger to bring your chin up.

“Let me see those stunning eyes of yours.” You could have just melted then and there.

“She’s so much prettier then me, I couldn’t help but think-“

“Shh.” He cuts you off and pulls you into his chest once more.

“Don’t you know how beautiful you are?” He asks before standing up and grabbing your hand. He then leads you over to your full body mirror.

“Do you see yourself? Do you see the goddess that I see?” You cross your arms over your body, insecure under his watchful eye. He brings your hands down to your side.

“You have the softest skin.” His hands trailed down the exposed skin on your stomach.

“The beauty marks on your neck.” His lips ghost just under your ear. He then begins kissing your neck, resulting in you letting out a couple little moans.

Then he pulls your pyjama top off to expose your boobs.

“The freckles between your breasts.” His fingers trace over the freckles, then grabs your breasts to message, sometimes your nipples getting attention.

“The curves of your hips.” Your shorts are suddenly pulled down your legs and you become completely naked. Looking in the reflection of the mirror, you can see Matt grinning devilishly down at you, examining every nook of your form.

“I love your laugh, your mind, your voice and the way you care for others. You are gorgeous to me, every single bit.” And with that he cups your hot centre. You let out a whine, gripping onto his forearm that sat against your stomach.

“Do you want me to show you how much I love you? Want me to show you just how beautiful you really are?” He no longer holds a smile on his face, but a serious look of lust as he whispers those words against your ear.

“God yes.” You sigh out, arching your back slightly to push your ass against his crotch.

“As you wish my love.” The hand he has placed on your mound moves and a single digit starts to slowly enter your hole. Your lips gets caught between your teeth as you watch him stare you down like his prey, enjoying you submit to him.

“Such a good girl.” You begin to reach your peak. you knew he wouldn’t go down without a fight however because he quickly removes his finger and watches you cry out, making you unable to finish.

“Taste.” He says placing his finger between your lips. You lean your head back onto his naked chest as you suck the digit seductively.

“Fuck.” He whispers watching you in the mirror.

“What does my beautiful girl want?” He asks as you continue to suck his finger.

“I want your cock.” You gasp out. He sighs and closes his eyes for a moment, basking in the sound of you saying that. 

You are about to turn around to get on your knees but he instead grabs your shoulders to stop you.

“No, don’t worry about me. I’m here to take care of you, alright?” You nod with doe eyes and he smiles lightly before turning you back around.

You hear the zipper of his pants unzip and the clanking of his heavy belt hit the floor. You shiver in anticapation. 

You finally open your eyes and look at your slightly disheveled hair. Waiting for his next move, you find yourself growing impatient. Your legs suddenly get  pushed apart and he nudges you forward slightly so your hands grab either side of the mirror frame. So close to your reflection, you can see all of your imperfections. But you were okay with them. Matt was right, you are beautiful.

You take a moment to observe yourself before you suddenly feel him enter from behind. You wince then relax immediately, your body recognizing the feeling of him all so well.

He begins thrusting slowly and gently, allowing you to fully take in everything that is happening. You look up and see his face fully focusing on you and you clench slightly as a result.

Matt then pulls you back towards him and turns you around so the front of your body is flush against his. He grips your left thigh and wraps it around his torso before entering you again. The new angle makes you shutter. He isn’t as gentle this time. He stares at the side of your face through the mirror as he methodically pounds into you. He holds you tightly, giving you the impression that he never wants to let go. He then grips your cheeks and places a sloppy kiss on your lips which you gladly return. Both of you mutter curses and moan into each other’s mouth. His pace quickens, leaving you incoherent.

“Can I come in you?” He gasped out. You just nod profusely as you stare into each other’s eyes. His sex face is the hottest thing in the world. You have no intention of stopping your deep stare. You want the image ingrained in your head for the rest of your life. You use the hand not holding onto him for dear life to wipe his sweaty hair off of his forehead. He lets out a gutteral moan before rutting his hips sporadically up into you.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” He cries out before letting his seed shoot up into you. You moan his name out in response and end up unravelling yourself.

He pants out in exhaustion, dropping his forehead into the crook of your shoulder and neck before slipping out of you. You shake a tad at the feeling of him leaving your body.

“Never doubt yourself again. You are beautiful inside and out Y/N.” You nod and hug him with a life saving grip.

“Thank you.” You whisper into his ear.

[leenasrecs]

》navigation 《

⤷ main blog:

— blueeyedheizer (writing blog)

⤷ main tag:

— #leena's recs

⤷ specific tags / current recs available on my blog (will be updated regularly)

— #michael gray rec

— #bbtl matt rec

— #tommy shelby rec

— #four/billy rec

— #j cody rec

— #cassie howard rec

— #ben hardy rec

— #eddie munson rec

— #tom grant rec

— #hellcheer rec

— #AO3 rec (hellcheer recs)

— #chishiya shuntaro rec

⤷ before we start...

— It is possible that I sometimes forget to properly tag some of the fics I reblog and I apologize for that in advance ! Let me know if a tag is missing and I will fix that.

— I try to comment on every fic I repost because I know how important feedback is for writers.

— None of the fics I reblog are mine, unless they are reblogged from my writing blog blueeyedheizer.

Enjoy!

[blueeyedheizer]

Period pains SUCK, could I have a blurb where Matt (bbtl) comforts you during the hellish time of the month, please and thank you love.

[this isn't so well written i'm sorry 👉🏻👈🏻]

You’re still in bed?” Matt's voice startled you as he entered his room. You groaned in response and buried your face further into the pillow, not feeling like making any small talk. Matt walked over to the bed and sat down, his hand starting to rub your lower back soothingly as it was facing him.

"Is there anything I can do for you?"

"I don't know, Matt!" you snapped. The room fell silent for a moment and the hand stroking your back stilled before sliding from your skin. But Matt didn't move; you could still feel his weight on the bed. After a few seconds, you sighed and carefully rolled over, finally facing him. He was looking at you with a worried expression. Your face was paler than usual and the bags under your eyes were darker.

You reached for his hand, squeezing it softly with the hint of an apologetic smile.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap." you mumbled before closing your eyes again, your hand moving to rest against your tummy, trying to bring yourself some warmth. "I don't even know what to do to ease the pain myself. I'm just waiting for these stupid painkillers to kick in, but right now they don't seem to be doing their job."

He nodded understandingly and brushed his hand through your hair softly, smoothing it away from your face before sliding his hand down to your back and tracing lazy circles over it again. You shifted on the bed and pat the empty space next to you invitingly. Matt quickly slid under the sheets and wrapped an arm around you, letting you get comfortable against him. You tried to find a comfortable position, being careful not to squeeze your breasts too much as they were extremely sore. Matt's hand kept sliding up and down your back, adding some pressure here and there with his thumb, causing you to sigh in relief when he rubbed the right spot. He started telling you about his band's newest demo to try and distract you from the pain, his hands never stopping their movements, sometimes sliding up to stroke your hair soothingly. You couldn't help but smile as you listened to his voice, hearing how passionate he sounded when talking about his music.

"I'm sorry I probably won't be able to attend your gig tonight." you mumbled sadly, drawing patterns on his chest with your fingertips.

"It's alright, love. There's plenty more coming."

[bride-of-rock-n-roll]

The babe (Matt from BBTL) or Ben Hardy’s Roger Taylor??

Oh crap.

[withhowsadsteps]

non potrà colpirti più niente - matt (blinded by the light)

y’all this aint very good but it is still something. i’ve been hella busy with my studies and i managed to get sick so… yeah. i’ve been listening to måneskin’s coraline on repeat so i used it as my inspiration. i think my fever is getting worse so if the ending seems a bit sudden... i'm sorry

warnings: mention of rape, violence and miscarriage, sad stuff words: just a bit over 1200

oh ps. unfortunately, i don’t speak italian but because i absolutely adore the way it sounds i’ve googled translations and the title means nothing will ever hurt you again. this song is literally so tragically beautiful y’all should listen to it and check out it’s lyrics

Y/N sat on her bed, her hands wrapped around her stomach. She thought that she was loved and she was happily falling in love with a man who seemed to be perfect. But life is cruel, and everything is not as it seems. It all happened so slowly that she didn’t even realize what was happening until it was too late. He started controlling her life bit by bit, starting from her friendships and clothing until she was basically all alone. She was his puppet. The countless times he raped her even when she told him no broke her. In the end she didn’t even have the energy to try and stop him. Eventually, she found out she was pregnant. She was very young still and very unsure of bringing a baby to this life of abuse, but at the same time the thought of having a child and someone to love and be genuinely loved by… it comforted her. When he found out about the pregnancy, he changed his behavior. For a while life seemed to get better and Y/N got to enjoy the pregnancy for that short while. But everything changed way too quickly. Y/N’s lifelong best friends, Javed and Matt came to visit her, out of the blue. Matt was back in the city and wanted to see her. Y/N was over the moon, happy to tell her friends about her pregnancy, but her so-called boyfriend did not want to see another man so close to her. He also knew way too well, that Matt used to have a crush on her. Everyone else knew, but she seemed oblivious. He also knew that Y/N probably still, subconsciously or consciously, dreamed of a life with Matt. After that visit, Y/N found herself in a hospital room. Her worried parents by her side. Losing her baby shattered her world all over again.

Y/N heard her mother’s worried whispers outside her bedroom door. She broke her trance and unwrapped her arms, got up and dried the tears on her cheeks. Moving back to home happened quickly, but it was the safest thing to do. But she couldn’t stay. Not in Luton. It was time for her to finally move away and start a life somewhere else. Today was that day. Her parents stood outside her room, waiting for her. Her father picked up the last few bags around her room and took them to the car. Destination: London.

When they were little Javed, Matt and Y/N always talked about London. Moving there, dreaming of a glamorous life there. After her parents left her in her new apartment, she broke down freely. Letting her emotions take over her completely. She had been trying to stay strong in front of her parents, but inside her feelings were a tumultuous storm waiting to erupt and destroy everything in its path. The anxiety completely took over, her sobs filling the small apartment. Her cries could make the coldest murderer cry, the despair and loss strongly audible. After a while, she pulled her phone out and called the first person on her mind. Matt.

-

While Matt drove from his apartment somewhere in London to her place, Y/N washed her face with cold water. She hoped that it would cool down her face enough to reduce the swelling around her eyes. She looked like shit. She felt empty. Her body felt distant, strange. Y/N looked at her stomach once again, imagining what it would’ve looked by now. Thinking about her baby, now gone. Hearing the doorbell, she quickly moved to open the door and welcomed Matt in. He didn’t know about her situation, she never dared to tell him. Seeing her like this immediately worried him. He looked around the apartment for any signs of Y/N’s boyfriend but realized that there was no boyfriend. He didn’t know too much about pregnancies, but she didn’t look pregnant to him. Wasn’t she supposed to have a rounder belly by now? He closed the door behind him and managed to undress his leather jacket before hearing Y/N sobs. Wrapping his arms around her, Matt managed to move them to the sofa. He held her, tightly. He did not know how much time had passed, but Y/N sobs quieted down, and she seemed tired. It didn’t take much for her to fall asleep in his arms. Y/N felt safe in Matt’s arms, safest she had felt. Safer than she had felt at her childhood home. Nowhere felt safer than here right now. After she woke up, she had to gather everything in her to tell Matt what had happened.

Matt didn’t dare to say out loud what he was thinking. He wanted to beat the bastard until he begged for mercy, but knew that it wouldn’t help Y/N. So, he just stayed there, holding here, watching over her. Over the weeks he came to her apartment to check on her, to make or bring her food. He had to make sure that she ate. This was one of those days. “You probably think that I’m behaving like a child”, she whispers quietly, avoiding Matt’s eyes. “No, I think that you’re behaving like someone who has been through hell” he truthfully told her and pointed at her plate of food. Y/N shook her head a bit. “I’m sorry Matt, I can’t. Not now” she told him. Matt couldn’t forcefully feed her, but he tried his best to make her feel better. And he had made progress.

With Matt’s help, Y/N got better. It took some time, and it was not easy, but she managed to get her life back. She got a well-paying job, a bigger apartment in a nicer neighborhood and closer to Matt’s, even a small car. She felt better, even though she thought about her baby a lot. Matt sometimes noticed the longing look on her face when she saw pregnant women or newborn babies. He always had had a crush on Y/N but he never thought of having kids at all, not even with her. But his feelings and love seemed to grow day by day and he noticed that he started to think about having kids. Seeing her longing for a family of her own… it did something to him. But the only woman he wanted to be his and the mother of his kids was her.

~ two years later ~

Y/N yawns tiredly and rubs her round belly a bit, feeling the little one’s kick on her palm. A little giggle escaped her lips. “Yeah, I know you’re wide awake, but mommy’s a bit sleepy” she says quietly and finally puts away the last diapers.

Matt approached his wife and wrapped his arms around her, resting his chin on her shoulder. “Mommy should rest, remember? You know very well what the doctor said” he murmured and softly kissed her cheek.

“I can’t help it; I can’t wait to have the baby in my arms” she said and turned around in his arms. The fear of losing her baby had been very bad during the first trimester and somehow it still bothered her. A monster luring inside her head.

“Nothing will ever hurt you again. Nothing or no one. I’m going to keep both of you safe” Matt whispers and presses his forehead against hers. They found solace and love in each other. Matt wouldn’t let anyone take that away from them.

[withhowsadsteps]

is someone still reading fics for dean's characters? as soon as i get some free time from my uni work (hopefully in a few weeks) im planning on trying to write something again. im so tired on working on essays and else i want to write something for fun

[mattsredjacket-archive]

*°• Matt + 𝒷𝑒𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓈𝑜𝒻𝓉 •°*

[mydemimonde]

‘muse’ ch. 7 | matt (bbtl)

you’re in for a treat my friends ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

CHAPTER 7

Mia took a deep breath and knocked on the door. She shifted her weight from one foot to the other, waiting for him. She was mentally preparing her apologize speech when Matt opened the door. Suddenly, she forgot what she was going to tell him.

He was surprised at seeing her there, for him it was clear that she didn’t want them to be friends anymore. He crossed his arms and leaned on the doorframe. He didn’t say a word. Mia noticed how her hands were sweating and her heart beating fast.

“Hi Matt… I came to talk to you, about… what happened the other day”

His eyes narrowed and he sighed. “I don’t know what you want to talk about, you made it really clear you don’t want me to be your friend anymore” he stated with a slack expression on his face.

She bit the inside of her left cheek. “That’s not true Matt, I really want your friendship, more than anything. Just let me explain myself” at this point she was desperate. She wanted everything to be alright between them. But she also couldn’t stand seeing Matt and Emma together, even if his happiness meant the world for her.

He meditated for a few seconds before moving to the right and allowing here to step inside. She swallowed hard and entered his house, gripping hard the strap of her bag. They went to the living room and sat on the couch, on polar opposites. She took a deep breath before speaking.

“I’m sorry I behaved like an insensitive bitch. You didn’t deserve that. It’s just…” she bit her lower lip. “You know I was never good at expressing my emotions, or controlling them” he nodded in acknowledgment. “That’s the reason why I’ve been acting strange around you. There’s something happening with me and I don’t know how the fuck to deal with it, so I exploded” her speech was rushed; she covered her face with her hands.

“Hey, hey” he quickly went to sit next to her, grabbed her hands and put them on her lap. “What’s going on, love?” the pet name made her even more anxious, but she loved it anyway.

“It’s not that easy to explain” tears threaten to spill and her voice cracked. He caressed her cheek, showing worry and affection. “I acted like that because I was angry. Angry at you and Emma”

His expression softened. “Love, I’m sorry. I know I spent a lot of time with her lately, and talked about her all the time. I know that it annoyed you, and Javed as well. I promise…”

“No, you don’t understand Matt. It’s not that. I was jealous” she confessed.

“Jealous?” he wiped a tear away from her face with his thumb.

“Jealous of Emma” she expected a laugh from him. But he didn’t laugh. Instead, he showed even more confusion than before. “Oh, you’re so clueless Matt”

He chuckled and furrowed. “You’re not being very clear”

“I love you” she let it out and felt a weight off her shoulders. “And not as friends” Matt was looking dazed. She continued. “I’ve been in love with you since we were 8. I thought I was over you, but I was wrong. When I came back and saw you, I realized my feelings for you never vanished” Matt stood there, completely shocked. Her heartbeat was fast. “Say something please”

What could he say? His mind was racing, he couldn’t believe her words. It took him a moment to gather himself up and get on his feet. She looked down, believing she ruined their friendship for good. He extended his hand to her. “Come with me” she hesitated for a second, but took his hand.

They went to his room. It was a little messy, some sheets of paper –songs written by him, she supposed– were all over the bed, the guitar was there as well. Posters decorated the walls, and there was a synthesizer in one corner.

Matt collected the sheets of paper and put them on the drawer next to his bed. He told her to sit there, and went to the closet to look for something. She looked at the night table and saw a portrait. It was a picture of the trio as children, at Matt’s 10th birthday. He had a red birthday hat, Javed was on his left and Mia on his right. They were sticking their tongues out, and their noses were covered in frosting. She smiled fondly.

“Here” Matt returned with a box and opened it. It was full of papers, drawings, old pictures and a black bracelet. She recognized those last two items immediately. “I saved all of them” he took the bracelet in his hand. “You made this and gave it to me on my birthday. I remember you were upset because you didn't have enough money to buy me a new jacket, so you made this and I told you that the jacket didn't matter, that I loved the bracelet. I would wear it all the time, proudly" he looked at it and smiled. Then, he showed her the drawings. "These were drawn by you on a rainy day. We were stuck here in my house, we were bored and you drew this" she examined at the three colourful figures: Javed, Matt and Mia in the park.

Mia took the polaroids, which captured some of their happiest memories. The trio posing next to a Christmas tree, opening their gifts, eating marshmallows. Then, there was a picture of Matt and Mia alone. She was kissing his cheek, and he had a grin on his face.

"Do you remember the day you told us you were moving to Liverpool?" she nodded. "I was pissed. Really pissed. But not at you, at myself" she slightly shook her head, not quite understanding. "I was angry because I never had the guts to tell you about how I felt about you. When I finally gathered courage, you were leaving" he started to rummage through the box and grabbed the sheet of papers. "I know I was a little kid and barely began to understand what love was, but I couldn't help being so upset" Mia couldn't believe what she was hearing. "After you left, I felt empty. Everything I did was talk to Javed about you. Poor lad, I know I exhausted him" he chuckled.

"Matt, I..."

He cut her off, lifting a finger. "Let me finish. Do you know why I decided to become a musician?" she shook her head. "At first I thought it was just a hobby as a kid. Watching rock stars do their thing, it was really exciting. I wanted that. But that isn't the reason anymore"

"Then what is it?" she had no idea where this conversation was going. But she was curious.

"You" Matt's eyes and tone were sincere. "You are the reason. You inspired me to write songs since we were kids" he handed over the crumpled sheets of paper, and she took them. Most of the songs were about love, admiration or heartbreak. All about her. "The first ones are shitty because, well, I was 10, but my feelings were true. And they still are. You're my muse"

She blushed and blinked repeatedly. This wasn't what she was expecting from him. Never in a million years. She looked at the last sheet of paper, it had a familiar date on it. It was from 5 days ago.

"I wrote that after your… outburst. The day we went to the park" his eyes were fixed on the paper.

The image of Matt playing the guitar and writing came to her mind. Of course, she saw him through her window that night. "Oh. I'm sorry about that too. I was hurt because of the necklace. I thought it was for me. That's why I overreacted" Mia bit her lip and looked down, embarrassed.

He placed his hand on her cheek. "I'm so sorry for that, babe. I'm stupid" she looked up and met his blue eyes. "I should've told you before"

"It's not your fault, it was mine for making stuff up in my head and creating fantasies..."

"No Mia, not that" he giggled. "I love you. I always have. That's what I should've told you"

Mia was puzzled. After a few seconds of silence, she chuckled. "You do realize that we're the most idiot people in the world?"

"What do you mean?" he grinned.

"It took us 9 years to confess our feelings to each other. We're literally so stupid, I can't bel–" her rambling was cut off by Matt’s lips on her. His right hand kept caressing her cheek, and the left went immediately to the back of her neck, pulling her closer to him. Mia was totally taken aback by his sudden movement, but kissed him back. Her shaky hands grabbed his jacket, closing the short distance between them. His lips were soft against hers and she felt like the time stopped. Mia could smell the mix of his perfume and cigarettes. She felt dizzy.

He pulled back and rested his forehead on hers. “I wanted to do that for such a long time. I even pictured how it would be” he smirked.

Mia licked her lips. “How did it turn? Just like you imagined?”

“Hmm” he looked up, thinking. “I think I’ll need to check again” Matt went in for another kiss, this time it was deeper. Her lips tasted like strawberry chapstick, he wanted more. Mia moved her hands to the back of his neck, running her fingers through his hair. He tenderly traced her lower lip with the tip of his tongue and she parted her mouth slightly, moaning softly. Panting, they pulled back to catch their breaths.

“So?” her eyes were locked on Matt’s, his pupils were large.

“It was way better that I imagined”

 - - - - - - -

tag list: @blueeyedheizer​

[mydemimonde]

‘muse’ ch. 8 | matt (bbtl)

CHAPTER 8

A smile formed on Mia’s lips, hearing Matt’s sweet voice singing to her. It was his original song, one of the hundreds he wrote for her. She couldn’t help but blush any time he looked or winked at her. Once he finished playing, she applauded. Matt bowed his head.

“That was beautiful Matt. This is the best love song ever!” Mia was excited, just like a kid in a candy store. He giggled and put the guitar aside, next to the couch.

“You said the same about the 4 previous songs”

“Yes, but this” she pointed at the papers “is different”

“You said that too” he put his arm around her shoulders and kissed her temple.

“I’m serious Matt, you’re so talented. Not only at singing and playing, your writing skills are amazing”

Matt’s cheeks began to get a little bit of pink, amused by her praising. “Well, this is all thanks to you. My inspiration comes from you” he gave her a little peck on the lips, and she shook her head ‘no’.

“Don’t discredit yourself Matt, you’re so talented on your own. You and your band should be famous by now”

“We play every Saturday night at a pub, we already have fans. We’re still working on our demo, which is pretty good. And we’ll go on tours, I’ll take you with me. We’ll go to a lot of places, together” he locked his fingers in hers.

“I love the sound of that” she gave him a genuine smile and rested her head on his shoulder. They stayed there for a while, enjoying each other’s presence and warmth. Until the door snapped open. Emma.

Oh, oh.

Mia’s eyes went wide, she totally forgot about her. She felt a little bit bad and guilty. Emma and Matt were still dating before they kissed, and although she was utterly happy her feelings for Matt were mutual, she couldn’t help but feel sorry for Emma. Even if she was a total bitch.

Emma’s quirky smile slowly vanished when her eyes fell on Matt and Mia’s hands. He quickly got on his feet, Mia stayed there to watch the scene that will unfold in front of her.

“What does this mean, Matt?” her eyebrows were furrowed in confusion.

“Emma, we have to talk…”

“Talk about what? You’re cheating on me?” her voice began to raise, clearly showing she was angry. “And with her?!” she pointed at Mia, giving her a dead look.

And that’s when Mia’s guilt disappeared. She was a bitch. “Hey!”

“Emma, stop. Look, I’m sorry, but I’m in love with Mia. I always have been” he tried to reason with her, she looked like she had daggers in her eyes.

“You know what? Nevermind. I honestly think you two losers were made for each other. Good luck with your mediocre band Matt, and good luck Mia. He will get tired of you eventually” she spat furiously. She turned around and opened the door with anger.

But Mia wouldn’t get her get away with it. She approached Emma and grabbed a some of her hair, pulling it down. Emma let out a small cry and looked at the strand of the hair in Mia’s hand. Matt’s mouth fell open, surprised at Mia’s action.

“What the fuck?!”

Mia smirked and squinted her eyes. “I always knew you wore extensions” Matt supressed a laugh. “Now get out of here”

Emma was about to say something, but chose to snatch the strand of hair Mia pulled from her and leave. “Oh. My. God. What was that?”

“She deserved it. I won’t let her say those things about you” she said as a matter of fact, giving him a soft look.

“Not gonna lie, that was… hot” he wiggled his eyebrows and she laughed. He placed his arms on her hips, leaning forward. “And I won’t let anyone, ever, talk shit about my lovely girlfriend” he kissed her slowly and passionately, enjoying the tenderness of her lips. She continued the kiss, but pulled away a little.

“Girlfriend?” he nodded, maintaining eye contact with her. “Hmm, you never asked me properly” she joked and went to grab her bagpack, ready to go back to her house. After all, she had tons of homework, and she was hungry. Matt stayed there, shocked. “See you later Matt, I have to do homework” she kissed his cheek.

“Mia…” but she was already gone.

- - - - - - -

Mia closed her house’s door and quickly waved hello to her parents, then immediately ran upstairs, looking for her sister. She knocked on her door but didn’t wait for an answer, instead she opened it quickly. Nellie yelled, a bit scared. “Hey! Why would you do that? You scared the fu-“

“We kissed!” Mia’s smile was so big and bright, she was scandalously happy.

Nellie tilted her head, not quite understanding Mia. “What? Who? When?” she put the book down.

“Matt!” Mia went to sit next to her; her heart was beating incredibly fast.

“What?! For real?!” Mia’s older sister’s eyes widened. “Oh my God that’s fucking awesome!” she squealed and hugged her sister tight, they started to jump on the mattress. “Tell me everything right now, all the details” she grabbed her cup of tea from the night table and looked at Mia impatiently.

“Well, I went to his house to tell him that I was sorry for being such an asshole to him. I confessed my feelings for him, that I was avoiding him to protect my heart” she explained to Nell, whose ears pricked up. “I seriously thought that as soon as I confessed, our friendship was fucked. But he grabbed my hand and took me to his room…”

“Oh God Mia tell me you didn’t…”

Mia quickly slapped her shoulder. “No! Not yet, though” she winked and both giggled. “Let me finish” she sighed. “He showed me a lot of stuff he kept all these years. Pictures, drawings, the black bracelet I made for his birthday, and lots of songs he wrote. For me”

“Aww. That’s so cheesy” she pretended to be disgusted and faked throwing up, making Mia laugh.

“It’s sweet, shut up. Anyway” she took a deep breath. “He told me he felt the same, and that he’s been in love with me since we were children. Then we kissed” Mia’s facial muscles were hurting by now from smiling so much.

“Finally! It took both of you almost 10 years to realize it. I’m so happy for you Mia, I really am” she was being honest, nothing on Earth made her happier than seeing her little sister happy.

“Oh, but I haven’t told you the best part yet” she squinted her eyes. “Guess who showed up at Matt’s house”

Nell gasped. “Emma” Mia nodded. “Please tell me you fist fought her”

“I wish I had. I pulled a strand of hair, and that proved our theory. Emma effectively wears extensions”

Nell let out a loud laugh. “I knew it! We absolutely knew it. Oh, sweet Jesus, I wish I was there to see it” they stood there for a bit, until Mia remembered she had homework.

“See you at dinner Nell, I have tons of homework for tomorrow” she went to her room and sat in front of her desk to start writing her essay.

 After a delicious dinner and a warm bath, Mia was ready to go to bed. She had a long and tiring day, not only because of school, but also for everything that happened that afternoon. She still couldn’t believe that her best friend, the boy she fell in love with when she was 8, returned her feelings. The fact that she was his muse made her feel on cloud 9, she was the luckiest girl in the world.

Mia turned the lights off and was about to get on bed, when she heard a bang on her window. She gasped when she heard another bang, then another one. She decided to look, worried about the glass breaking. She muttered a ‘what the hell’ when she saw Matt standing there on the sidewalk, with a smile on his face. Mia opened the window.

“Are you out of your mind? You could have broken the window with the rocks you were throwing”

“I’m sorry, I needed to catch your attention. I need to tell you something”

“Couldn’t you wait until tomorrow? It’s late and I have school tomorrow”

“Nope” he proceeded to climb the wall, making his way to her bedroom.

“Matt, no!” she whispered loudly, worried about his safety. But it was late, he was already stepping his foot inside.

“If my parents find out you’re here, they’ll kick you out of the house”

“I don’t mind, I really need to ask you something” Mia rolled her eyes and sighed. “So, you told me I didn’t ask you properly, right?” he was out of breath for climbing up the wall.

“What?”

“Mia Bradley. Would you be my girlfriend?”

The corners of her lips slid upwards, but she tried to hide her smile. She pretended to doubt and think about his proposal, staring blankly at the ceiling. Matt seemed desperate. “Of course, Matt. I wanna be your girlfriend”

He closed his eyes and let out a sigh of relief. “Thank God” she giggled and grabbed his shirt to pull him closer, kissing him with passion.

tag list: @blueeyedheizer​

[blueeyedheizer]

overworking - matt (bbtl)

(hello there sexy)

A/N: so um,,, i'm only 1 week into uni and I already hate it. like. every single class bores the shit out of me. also I'm still friendless. and I hate studying. I literally, physically cannot keep my eyes on a screen and read the same thing over and over. I only get distracted and irritated. I was kinda forced into enroling to uni and fuck I genuinely hate it here, I really wasn't made for studying. honestly, writing about exams and having breakdowns and all this stuff revolving around studies made me anxious 💀💀💀oh how I wish I had a matt to cheer me up rn. 😗 anyway, enough talking

---

You stared at the screen of your laptop, eyes burning as you tried to retain as much of the informations you were reading as you could. Your hands came up to your temples, rubbing them in small circle as a headache pounded in your head. Sighing, you buried your face in your hands and let a few tears of frustration wet your cheeks before falling back against your chair, one hand moving up to grip your hair.

The semester was almost over, your exams were approaching. Stress was quickly going up, most of your days were spent in front of your laptop, and your nights were sleepless. If you did get some sleep, you would wake up early and get back to work as soon as possible. The overwhelming amount of work was crushing you, causing you to cry almost daily. Matt would come to see you every hour or so and massage your shoulders, kiss the top of your head and tell you to take a break before walking out after you tell him that you can't.

Finally, after 4 hours of intense reading and numerous breakdowns, you finally decided to take a break. Your head was pounding like mad and despite your will to keep studying you knew working with a headache could only lead to more breakdowns and tears. You shook your head and slammed your laptop shut before stretching your back and dragging yourself out of your room to the living room, making your way over to Matt. He was practicing some chords on his guitar, paying attention to every note, not noticing your presence until you sat down on the couch next to him with a deep sigh.

He turned around and gave you a small smile before setting his guitar down and leaning back against the couch. You scooted closer to him, your arms coming to wrap themselves around his chest as you leaned your head on his shoulder and closed your eyes. You let out a small sigh of content when you felt him start to rub your scalp gently.

"How are you feeling?"

"My head feels like it's going to explode." you murmured against him, feeling his lips press on top of your head.

"Look, I know you don't want to, but you need to take a break. And by break, I mean a real break. Two days off, at the very least." you groaned in response and buried your head further onto his chest, holding onto him tighter as you felt the tears come back.

You were already a pretty emotional person, but when a bunch of stress was piled on top of that, the most minimal inconvenience could get you in tears. That was another thing that sucked about being so stressed. You were an emotional mess, literally.

"I'm sorry." you whimpered. "I'm so fucking tired, Matt. No matter how hard I work, I can't seem to get any of the fucking words I read inside my head." you sniffled, letting your tears soak the fabric of his shirt. He gently shushed you and pulled away so he could lift your chin up then cup your cheeks with his hand. He wiped your tears away with his thumb and placed a kiss on your lips.

"You're gonna do great, Y/N. But for now you need to rest. There's a difference between working hard and overworking yourself. You know this isn't healthy. I barely see you anymore, and when I do you're either crying or exhausted." you shrugged, making him peck your lips once more. He got up and went to get you some medicine to treat your headache before sitting back next to you, letting you cuddle against him again.

You stayed like this for a solid 20 minutes, your muscles and nerves slowly easing out of tension. You could feel the medicine begin to take effect as your headache slightly dimmed down, your boyfriend's fingertips lightly scratching your scalp also greatly helping. After a few more minutes you pulled away, opening your eyes and leaning up to kiss him.

"Thank you."

Matt only smiled in response, his thumb gently brushing over your bottom lip. He pulled you in for a kiss and slowly climbed on top of you when you deepened it, his lips soon moving down to your neck causing you to bite your bottom lip with a smirk.

"What are you doing?" you chuckled, tangling your hand in his hair as his lips traveled back up to yours.

"Just lay back and let me take care of you, yeah?"

[mydemimonde]

‘muse’ ch. 5 | matt (bbtl)

CHAPTER 5

“Tell him I’ll be there in a sec” her mother nodded and closed the door. Mia fixed her hair and looked at Nell, who was smirking.

“Don’t” Mia gave her a death glare and her sister gasped.

“I didn’t say anything!”

Mia headed downstairs and saw Matt leaning on the door frame. “Hey Matt” Mia’s heart jumped when he saw him smile widely at her. “What are you doing here?”

“I was worried. You left the party early last night, what happened?” he put his hands in his jeans’ pockets.

Hmm let’s see, Lyla is a complete asshole who treated my best friend like shit, your girlfriend behaved like an idiot with my sister, and then I walked into both of you making out almost naked that it broke my heart into million pieces…

“I was a little tired, that’s all” what a good liar. “My feet were hurting”

“Awww, poor baby” he seemed genuinely concerned. “Anyway, I hope you can walk with me to certain place…” he had a mischievous smile.

“Uhm, where?”

“Come with me, let’s go” he grabbed her hand and dragged her out.

“Wait, wait, where are we going?” Mia was confused.

“Patience, you’ll see” he then stopped in front of her, bending his knees just a little. “Hop on!”

“Are you going to piggyback me all the way to wherever you wanna take me? I don’t think you’ll make it…”

“C’mon, like the old times!” she gave in and hopped on his back. He placed his hands on the back of her knees, and she wrapped her arms around his neck. The smell of cologne and shampoo invaded her nostrils, she was enjoying the proximity.

He started walking, gripping her knees tight to prevent her from falling on her back. “Did you like the party?”

She nodded. “Hmm, yes. I thought it was gonna be a small party…”

“Oh, it was”, she chuckled “Emma planned to invite every lad from here, but I told her no. My house’s not enormous”

“Matt, there were like 80 o 100 people”

He chuckled. “What, you counted?”

“I did actually, I stopped counting at 83 because I got tired” she joked and he laughed. Her stomach fluttered at the sound of him laughing.

After some minutes of walking, they arrived at destiny. She looked up at the big bright sign in front of her.

“What are we doing here?”

“Let’s go inside, c’mon!” she jumped and got on her feet, he took her hand and both entered the place. It was a jewelry store, one of the most expensive in Luton. She looked around in awe, rings, necklaces and bracelets filled the showcases.

Matt took her hand again and pointed at the necklaces. “Which one is prettier?” He’s… buying me a necklace? Her cheeks tinted a shade of pink at the thought.

“Uhm… what? I…” she examined the display cabinet. All of them were beautiful, the light made them sparkle. She pointed at the gold chain with a moon charm. “This one’s pretty”

He inspected it, narrowing his eyes. He smirked. “Yeah, this one’s nice” he turned to her. “Thank you for helping me, Emma’s birthday is in two days and I needed someone to help me pick the perfect gift for her”

WHAT?! The smile on her face vanished. “Oh… it’s for Emma…” it sounded like a whisper.

He nodded, then looked around for the cashier. A short haired woman saw them and approached. “Welcome, how can I help you?”

Mia felt a strong punch on her stomach. The cashier and Matt were having a conversation, one Mia couldn’t hear well because she was too focused on controlling her emotions. She wanted to punch something. Or someone. Matt specifically.

“Thank you very much” Matt payed for the necklace and thanked the cashier. On the way home, Mia heard Matt’s stories in Ibiza. How he met Emma, their first date, everything. She just smiled, pretending to be happy, and muttered a few “oh wow” or “that’s nice”.

“Matt, sorry but I have to go home now. Bye” she couldn’t listen to any more stories about the lovebirds. She ran to her house and left Matt with a dumfounded look.

Once inside her room, she grabbed her pillow, buried her face in it, and screamed with fury.

- - - - - - -

Mia’s eyes were fixed on her bowl of cereals, her dad was telling some anecdote of him and his colleagues at work, but she wasn’t paying attention. She was thinking about the necklace and how stupid she was for believing Matt would actually care enough for her to buy her a gift. An expensive one. Maybe it was time to forget about him, focus on school and getting enough high marks to get into a good college. She wouldn’t let a boy ruin her plans.

After breakfast Mia decided to go for a walk, alone. It would be good to clear her mind and relax. She always took long walks when she was feeling sad, angry or overwhelmed.

As soon as she stepped outside, she saw Matt approaching. Fuck, no. She started to walk a little faster.

“Mia, wait!” she stopped in her tracks and turned around. “Are you okay?”

“Uh, yes, why?” she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, tapping one foot, hoping for this conversation to end soon.

“Are you sure? Yesterday after the mall, you left just like that” he sounded worried. “Are you angry at me?” there was sadness in his eyes. When they were children and had fights (stupid and childish fights over trivial things, by the way), he was the most hurt. He couldn’t bear the fact that his best friend was angry at him.

“No, everything’s good. I was just tired. And I had things to do” she smiled, but the smile didn’t reach her ears. Anyway, Matt’s face relaxed and the corners of his mouth slid upwards.

“Oh, that’s relieving. I thought you were mad at me. Where are you heading?”

“I was about to go for a walk. I need to clear my mind”

“Guys!” they turned to see Javed coming towards them. “Are you hanging out without me?”

“No, I was about to go for a walk when Matt interrupted me” Matt laughed at her joke, but she wasn’t actually joking.

Matt got a stupendous idea. “Let’s go to the park and get some ice-creams!” Mia mentally cursed but agreed to Matt’s plan.

The park was surprisingly empty, considering it was the last days of summer holidays. Mia ran to the purple swing she adored as a little girl. Javed laughed. “You’re not 8 anymore”

“I have an inner child, Javed Khan” she joked.

Matt sat on the bench. “J, did you come to the party? I think I saw you with Mia and Nell, but I really don’t remember…” his eyebrows furrowed and he looked up the sky, as if trying to recall the events of two nights ago.

“Maybe you don’t remember because you were drunk” Matt gasped at Mia’s comment.

“Hey, I wasn’t that drunk!”

“In fact, you were a little tipsy. I was there mate, Nellie as well. You hugged her and then Emma came too”

“Oh, now I remember! Have you met Lyla already? Emma’s cousin”

Javed nodded and smiled timidly “Sorry mate, but she’s not my type”

“What?!” Matt’s eyes widened, not believing his friend.

“She’s pretty, but… what did you say?” he turned to Mia.

“She’s a bimbo” she got off the swing and sat on the grass. “She saw Javed and she treated him like a servant”

Matt was surprised at the fact, and annoyed at Lyla’s behaviour towards his friend “Oh God, I’m so sorry J”

“It’s okay mate, it’s not your fault”

“And to think that I almost dated her…” revealed a very confused Matt, breaking the short silence.

“You what?”

“While in Ibiza with my mates, they set me up on a blind date with Lyla. Emma helped. But I met her before the date and we hit it off immediately” they started walking towards their neighbourhood.

“Wait, did I tell you how we met?” he didn’t allow their friends to respond because he already started telling the story. It was getting on Mia’s nerves.

The whole way home Matt talked about Emma. Just like the day before. Emma did this, Emma did that. Emma’s amazing, Emma’s funny. Emma, Emma, Emma. “Have I told you that she makes amazing shots? Her brother’s a bartender and he taught her how…”

“Yes, we get it, Emma’s fantastic” Mia’s tone of voice was cold and direct. She was tired of hearing Matt endless talks about her. Both boys turned to her, taken aback by her tone.

“Hey” Matt’s voice softened, “what’s going on?”

“You just keep talking about Emma, all the time. Emma this, Emma that, blah blah blah”

“But…” he was baffled. Javed was uncomfortable at the whole situation.

“I know you’re in love with her” saying those words made her feel like throwing up. “But, mate, seriously stop”

“What the hell!? She did nothing to you!”

“I know she didn’t, but hearing you talk about her 24/7 every time we’re together, it’s not fair, we should be hanging out like the old times, just the three of us, talking about all of our adventures” she took a deep breath. “But if you’re gonna act like a henpecked boyfriend… bye”

She turned around and went inside her house, leaving her friends with their mouths wide open, staring at the door.

- - - - - - -

tag list: @blueeyedheizer​

[mydemimonde]

‘muse’ ch. 6 | matt (bbtl)

CHAPTER 6

“I don’t know what came over me” Mia confessed to her friend Javed. Both were at the living room in Mia’s house, drinking some tea. After her outburst that afternoon, she locked herself up in her room, she didn’t want to talk to anyone. But her mother told her Javed was waiting for her outside, and had no choice but to go downstairs and see what was going on.

“Matt looked really hurt and confused. He didn’t say a word after what you told him, he went straight to his house” he stated with a brooding look. “Is everything okay?”

Now Mia felt bad. Really bad. “It’s just… my emotions accumulated and I exploded” he looked at her, curiously. “Oh, I forgot to tell you. When you left the party the other night, I went upstairs and accidentally walked into Matt and Emma making out.” She sighed. “They were about to have sex”

“Oh” he stood there, not knowing what to respond.

“That’s not the worst. Yesterday he took me to the store and made me pick a necklace. I thought it was for me, but it was for…”

“For Emma” he gave her a sorry look, his friend nodded and looked down.

“I know I over reacted, that was shitty” she covered her face with her hands, frustrated.

“Hey, you said it yourself, your emotions piled up” she lifted her head and he continued his statement. “You have the right to feel sad. You know I’ll be here, always”

She smiled and leaned forward, hugging him. “Thank you so much, J”

“Anytime”

“So, are you coming tomorrow for lunch?”

“Absolutely, I wouldn’t miss it for anything in the world. Should I bring something?”

“Just your presence” both lads laughed. Javed looked at his watch. “You have to go, right?”

“Yes, mum needs help with the sewing. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?” both got on his feet and Mia walked him to the door.

“See you J, send my regards to your mum”

“Will do”

Once she got her pyjamas on, Mia grabbed her book and sat on her bed. She tried to read, but couldn’t concentrate, her mind was elsewhere. Maybe she was too rude to Matt. Poor guy, he was so shocked and hurt when Mia snapped at him. It wasn’t his fault, it was her ability to hide and bury her emotions so deep, and then combusting when she’s overwhelmed.

She put the book down on her desk and walked towards the window. There, she had a view of the street and Matt’s house. Especially the living room and his bedroom. There he was, sitting on his bed with his guitar. She couldn’t hear from the distance, but she was sure it was a beautiful tune. It seemed like he was writing a song, because from time to time he would stop playing to grab a pencil and start writing on a paper.

Mia stared at him for a while, she noticed his sadness. Eventually, he placed his guitar aside, turned off the lights and went to bed. She closed the window and went to sleep as well.

- - - - - - -

There was a knock on the door, and Oliver opened it. “Well, hello Javed!”

“Hello Mr Bradley” he answered with a polite smile and tone.

“I told you to call me Oliver, no matter how much time has passed” he patted his back and closed the door. “You’re part of the family”

“Thanks Oliver”

They all sat on the table and Susie came from the kitchen with lunch. “I hope you enjoy this” she put the dish in the middle of the table and told them to help themselves.

“Is this your special recipe you would cook when we were children?” asked Javed after eating the first bite of it.

“Yes!” she sat on the other corner of the table, facing her husband. She looked at the empty chair next to Javed. “It’s a shame Matt couldn’t come”

Mia chew on her salad and nodded. Nellie frowned. “What happened?” she noticed Mia and Javed exchanging looks. “Did you have a fight?”

“No, not at all” declared Mia quickly, almost with her mouth full. What a professional liar. “He had another… event going on”

Oliver hummed. “I miss that lad. Hope next time he joins”

Mia just nodded in silence, focusing on filling her glass of water.

They talked about many things during lunch, Javed listened with interest at everything the family did over the past six years in Liverpool. Then, he told them about the struggles he and his family had everyday with money, especially now that his older sister’s wedding day was getting closer. The Bradleys just listened to him.

“Well, if you need help with anything just tell us. In fact, there’s a vacancy where I work, you can tell your father” Javed’s face lit up at Oliver’s words. “No experience needed”

“Really? Thank you so much”

Once lunch was finished, Mia and Javed helped Susie to wash the dishes, not without splashing water and playing around. The day was beautiful with the sun shining, they wouldn’t let the last day of holidays go to waste. They took their bikes and went cycling.

“What do you want to do after finishing school, J?”

“I want to go to college, Manchester, but my dad won’t let me. He wants me to stay here in this hole, so I don’t know”

“You will get into college, you’re so smart and resilient, you can do whatever you set your mind to” Mia loved his friend so much and hated when he teared himself down. “I know it’s hard to rebel against your parents, especially against your dad. But don’t let him decide your future”

Her words of encouragement made his eyes soften and his heart fill with joy. “Thanks Mia. And what do you want to do after school?”

She pursed her lips to the side, thinking. “I really want to get out of here. I’m not saying that I don’t like Luton, because I grew up here, but… I want to see the world; you know what I mean?”

“A hundred percent”

“I want to move to another place. I want to go to college and become a writer. Or an artist, I’m not quite sure yet. All I’m sure about is that I long to go to college”

“And we will” they smiled at each other.

They cycled for hours, until the sun started to set. They were parking their bikes when they heard a voice coming from behind them.

“Hi…”

It was Matt. They turned to look at him. “Hello mate” Javed greeted him, Mia started playing with the hem of her shirt, uneased.

“I saw you earlier. Why didn’t you tell me you were having lunch?” his blue eyes were full of hurt.

Javed looked at his friend, confused. “You didn’t tell him?”

Mia blinked. “Uhm…” she glanced at Matt, who was now feeling betrayed. “I was… I was going to tell you. But then you told me today was Emma’s birthday, so…” her voice lowered at the last words.

“I could’ve come anyways, the party wasn’t gonna start until tonight” Matt looked puzzled. Mia’s mouth opened, but she couldn’t form any words. She didn’t know what to say. He lowered his head and bit his lower lip. “Okay, I get it” his shoulders dropped and he backed away.

“Matt, wait” Mia went after him and grabbed his arm, but he let go of her grip.

“What do you want?” his voice cracked with a mix of anger and sadness. “Ever since you got here you’ve been acting strange. I thought we were gonna be friends like the old times, but you’ve been treating me like shit, or trying to avoid me” his eyes began to fill with tears.

Mia, you absolute idiot. Look what you’ve done.

He looked away, avoiding her eyes. “Look, if you don’t wanna be friends anymore, just tell me and I’ll understand. Because this…” he gulped “this is hurting me”

Matt turned around and went inside his house, leaving a speechless Mia behind.

- - - - - - -

Three days passed since the last day of holidays. Three days since Matt’s angry words at Mia. Three days since Mia realized she truly acted like an insensitive bitch towards Matt. He didn’t deserve that treatment; he deserved an explanation. But she had no idea what to say.

Sorry for being an asshole Matt, I was being a bitch because I don’t know how to express myself and control my emotions, I’m jealous of Emma because she’s pretty and hot and she has you wrapped around her finger, and all I can do is watch both of you from a distance and suffer in silence.

She sighed and grabbed her books. Literature lessons ended and now it was time to go home. Miss Clyde was an incredible literature teacher, but made them work very hard. Mia liked that kind of pressure though; it made her focus and make her best effort.

“How was Literature?” asked a panting Javed, who came running from Biology class.

“Very interesting. We discussed about Mary Shelley today. How was Biology?”

“Ugh, disgusting. We dissected a frog today” she pretended to vomit. “I know, Miss Wallis loved it though” he started looking inside his bag, frantically.

“What’s with the rush?” she watched how some of the books threatened to fall from the bag, and helped him look for whatever he was looking.

“Mia, I just had my eyes opened. And ears”

She giggled. “What are you talking about?”

“The boss. Bruce freaking Springsteen” he handed over the cassettes.

“What?” she took them and examined them.

“He’s just… amazing. It’s like he knows what’s going through in my brain, his songs speak to me on another level”

On the way home Javed talked to Mia about his new idol, agreeing on everything he said. Ever since her mother listened to him, she started to enjoy his music.

A few steps close to their homes, they saw Matt coming out of his friend’s car. Mia stared at him.

“I think it’s time to talk to him” Javed spoke and noticed how she was doubting his idea. “You can’t avoid him forever”

“I know. But I literally have no idea what to say”

“Saying ‘I’m sorry’ would be a good start” she slowly nodded. He sighed. “I hate being in the middle”

“I’m sorry for putting you in this position, you don’t deserve this” she patted his back.

“He’s the one who doesn’t deserve this. He deserves an explanation” he always said the right words. He was a great adviser.

“Yes, you’re right”. She saw how Matt laughed at something his friend said, then he said goodbye to them. When he lifted his head and saw Mia and Javed, he quickly looked away and went inside his home.

“Well, I better be going. I need to finish an essay, see you around” he ruffled her hair and she giggled.

She stood there, thinking about what to do. What Javed said was true, Matt deserved an explanation. She sighed and headed towards his house.

Here we go.

- - - - - - -

tag list: @blueeyedheizer​

[mydemimonde]

‘muse’ ch. 4 | matt (bbtl)

CHAPTER 4

Surprisingly, Javed accepted the invitation to Matt’s party. The only problem they had was that his father wouldn’t let him go outside at night, not for a party. Mia had the idea of telling Javed’s father they would stay at her house reading some books to prepare for school. He totally believed it, and now they were standing in front Matt’s house. Music could be heard from at least ten blocks away, the neon lights were all over the place.

“Before we go inside, remember that if you feel uncomfortable, we can leave, okay?” Javed nodded and they made their way into the house. A lot of people were drinking, talking and dancing, it wasn’t a small party like Mia was told.

“Alright, let’s go get some drinks!” proposed Nellie before looking at her sister and Javed. Mia invited her sister because she knew Javed would get bored and leave early, crazy parties like these (full of drunk people and weed) made him uncomfortable. She didn’t want to be alone there, with Emma and Matt sucking each other’s faces in front of her. “No alcohol for you”

Mia gasped. “That’s not fair!”

“It’s my duty to look aft…” a girl bumped into Nell. She looked at the obviously drunk blonde, checking if she was ok.

“I’m sorry…” she stumbled. “I was looking for Emma… Emma!” she yelled and looked around her. A few seconds later, Emma turned up, a drink on her hand. She looked breath taking with a red dress and her hair in a ponytail.

“Lyla, I finally found you”

So, this is Lyla. Mia turned to see Javed’s wide eyes. He looked at his friend and shook his head.

Emma glanced at them and welcomed them. “Hi guys! This is Lyla, my cousin” they saluted her and Lyla showed a drunk smile. Emma eyed Nellie, studying her. “Excuse me, you are…?”

“I’m Nellie. Mia’s sister” her smile was close-mouthed. Mia immediately recognized her sister’s disgust, she always smiled that way when she didn’t like someone, or something.

Emma’s eyebrows raised. “I didn’t know you were coming”

“Well I guess it won’t be a problem, since almost the entire population of Luton’s here” she deadpanned with a smug. Mia pressed her lips together to supress a laugh.

“This looks great, Emma. It’s a good party” she tried to lighten the tense atmosphere.

Emma turned to her. “Thanks sweetie, we have some drinks over there” she pointed at the table behind a group of friends chatting in a corner, “and snacks in the kitchen”

Lyla almost fell again, and looked up at Javed. “Oh, can you bring me another drink?”

Javed looked confused and kind of hurt, Mia wasn’t having it.

“Excuse me, are you stupid?”

Emma grabbed her cousin’s arm. “I’ll take Lyla outside to take some fresh air before she throws up” she dragged her cousin outside.

Immediately after they left, Mia rolled her eyes. “She’s a fucking asshole!”

“What a bimbo. Just like her cousin, I saw that coming I swear” Nellie had like a sixth sense when it came to people and their intentions. “If Emma ever looks at me like that again, I’ll shave her eyebrows.” Javed almost spat the juice.

“Mia, J!” a tipsy Matt made his appearance, placing each arm around Javed and Mia’s shoulders. “I’m so glad you made it here, the party’s going awesome!”

“Yeah we can tell. Half of your guests are drunk as hell” replied Nellie, taking a sip from her glass. Matt beamed.

“Nellie, you’re here too!” he quickly embraced her in a hug.

Nellie hesitated but returned the hug. “I couldn’t leave my little sister alone, besides, I love parties”

“Well I’m glad you’re all here, we can remember the good old times” the moment was interrupted by Emma, who made her way into the group.

“Baby! You’re having fun without me?” she laughed and kissed Matt’s lips eagerly.

Nellie rolled her eyes and looked away, Mia felt like a punch in her stomach.

“Shall we go to other place?” Nellie whispered into her sister’s ear and the trio left.

After an hour and a half of dancing and having fun, Mia’s feet started to hurt, but she didn’t want to leave. When she saw Matt and Emma kissing, she wanted to run, but thankfully Javed and Nellie were there to cheer her up.

Javed approached her with a sorry smile. “I’m sorry Mia, but it’s time for me to leave. It’s almost 11pm and my dad doesn’t want me to be out of the house for so long”

“It’s okay J. I’ll be fine, Nell’s with me” they said goodbye to each other and he left. Mia took her shoes off and went upstairs, looking for the bathroom. She couldn’t remember exactly were it was, despite having visited Matt’s house so many times during her childhood.

She opened the door of the last room in the hall, and her eyes widened at the sight. Matt was shirtless, sitting at the edge of the bed. Emma’s dress was down on the floor. She on top of him, kissing him with passion, just with her underwear. She closed the door immediately, breath hitched in her throat. She felt a hand on her shoulder and jumped.

“Let’s get out of here” asserted Nellie, looking at her sister’s teary eyes.

Mia couldn’t sleep. The image of Matt and Emma making out almost naked kept repeating in her brain. Luckily Nellie was there to wipe her tears away. Now, she was sure she wouldn’t tell him about her feelings for him. It was obvious that Matt was head over heels for Emma. Why wouldn’t he? She was just like him. She was like his soulmate.

- - - - - - -

“Good morning to you all” Mia’s voice sounded hoarse. She cried almost all night, her eyes were puffy and a little red.

“Hello hon… oh my God sweetie, you look dreadful” her mother said worried at the sight of her daughter.

“Well, thanks mum. Maybe I caught a cold last night. I forgot to take my jacket to the party” Nellie looked at her from the kitchen with a sorry look. “I’ll drink some coffee and a painkiller, my head’s killing me”

She sat next to her sister and both had their breakfast in silence. “How are you feeling?” Their parents were watching the news on TV, so they wouldn’t be paying attention to their conversation. Mia shrugged and proceeded to eat her waffles.

“I’ll be okay” her voice cracked at the end of her sentence. “My feet still hurt, remind me to never use high heels again to dance” she commented, trying to change the topic. Nellie giggled.

“Noted. Would you go with me to HMV? I need to buy new albums”

“Alright, let’s finish this up and let’s go” Mia ate the last bite of the waffles and went quickly to the bathroom to do her make-up, at least to cover the redness in her lids.

Nellie was ready when Mia headed downstairs, and they said goodbye to their parents.

Mia was laughing frantically as her sister told her how one guy tried to hit on her the night before, and when she refused him, he started crying. “I swear, he was crying like a spoiled little boy who didn’t get his favourite toy. Poor chap” their laugh ceased when they got into HMV and saw the cashier.

“You got to be fucking kidding me” Mia muttered. There she was, Emma chewing on a gum, twirling a strand of her hair. Mia turned her back to her. “It feels like she’s haunting me. I’m sure I’ll have nightmares tonight”

Nellie shook her head. “Let’s just focus on Cyndi, alright? I will look for the album and I’ll pay, so you don’t have to go…”

“Hey girls!” Emma hollered. Mia closed her eyes.

“Fuck” she faced Emma again. “Hello Emma”

“Do you need any help?” she wouldn’t stop chewing on the gum.

“No, we’re fine, thanks” she faced her sister again. “Let’s grab Cyndi and get out of here”

They went to look for the album they wanted and approached Emma.

“You left early last night. You missed all the fun!” she chirped while putting the album on a plastic bag.

I’m sure you didn’t.

“Matt asked for you when he couldn’t find you”

Oh.

“Yes, Mia wasn’t feeling alright. She caught a cold, actually” Nellie replied and payed for the article. “Nice to see you again, Emma”

“Same, bye” she answered waving her hand.

They left the building as quickly as possible and got themselves some soda. “She’s so annoying. Why is Matt so hooked?”

“They both love parties and loud music, etcetera, they were made for each other”

“He will get tired of her, eventually. She’s too loud” she stuck up her nose and finished her drink. “Let’s go to listen to this baby” Nell hold the album in her hands and hugged it.

Both sisters made their way to their house and immediately after lunch, they put the album on the record-player. Nellie was banging her head at the rhythm of the music, until they were interrupted by their mother, who knocked on the door and opened it immediately. Nell turned the volume down.

“Matt’s downstairs. He said he wanted to talk to you” she nodded towards Mia.

Ugh, no. I don’t need this today.

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