#maybe i should have just majored in cs and sold my soul. at least then i could be weird and off-putting in peace :')
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Having a real autism moment over the idea of doing fieldwork
#my brain just produced the thought 'they should have a class that teaches you how to talk to people before you go to the field'#sir i don't think anyone else needs that class. i don't think the people are clamoring for bulletpoints and flowcharts of social interactio#i'm just. i don't. i don't know how to do it#i can make friends fine when we've been in a protracted situation of working together but when i have to go out and meet people???#a thing you guys have to understand about me is that i WILL just stand and stare at people like the autism creature for 10 min straight#and then walk out of the room without saying anything more#or like i will start a conversation and then i will just Not Know What To Say#and like yeah it's social anxiety maybe but it's honestly more that i can't figure out how to have normal conversations#anyways. i am anxious i will say that#like i'm really excited too and i really want to meet cool people and work with them on developing the project#but also i am not sure how this is going to go. hmmm#maybe i should have just majored in cs and sold my soul. at least then i could be weird and off-putting in peace :')#(<- should not have done that. it is good to make attempts to be social and not put myself in a bubble)#perce rambles#this makes very little sense but you can ignore me i'm just having A Moment
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