#mmmm i imagine with how gungho shoto is about saving ppl even after being precautioned in danger he bit off more than he could chew

[dcwnrisen-aa]

[ last ]:     a letter sent in the aftermath of the writer’s death. / shoto tehe

The letter arrives in the wake of the aftermath of Shoto's death, an international thing that had spread on the news, broadcasting along side the grief-ridden faces of his friends. The envelope is clean, script written on the front and when it's opened, there's blood on the pages, fingerprints smeared and writing a little haphazard.

Dear Mom( @hembralfa ) , BonBon ( @nvrcmplt ) and Grandpa Bell,

I knew going into this mission would be dangerous. We prepared and prepped as much as we could but there's never a real plan to prepare for death. Or getting seriously injured. I feel like my time as a kid made me immune to pain, to the rush of danger because I've never really been....well, not hypervigilant. But I knew my time as your son, I never worried. I knew you would bring the world down if it meant securing my safety. Time and time again, you showed me I could trust in adults and other than Aizawa-sensei, I didn't ever want to put that trust in someone else.

But I let go, because you made it easy. I felt free, like all my worries mattered, that each pressing emotion was validated and that the child inside me, he was safe, that I could trust his fear, his vulnerability with you. And I'm really glad I did, it was one of the best decisions I ever made. I'm....not perfect. I curse more than I should. I don't respect authority and I can be hotheaded but I've been trying to be better. I didn't realize how much I changed. How much I craved family until you, BonBon, and Grandpa Bell. Even Bobby and Darren. I felt seen, and heard and even laugh more than I'm used to. Bon....he's everything to me.

I've never had a bond like that, I want to protect him, to see him smile, to go on adventures and experience new things. Being a big brother, never knowing what that's like and actually being in those moments ? Don't tell Bon, but I cry sometimes after he's fallen asleep. I want to be his safe space, to know he can come to me when he's feeling sad, when his emotions are too much. When he wants to share things and gets excited when we get to play with my quirk. Tell him I'm sorry we can't do that anymore, tell him not to get sad that I won't be there. Tell him.....tell him he's the best little brother in the world and I'm rooting for him.

I wish you had been my birth mother. Maybe it's not right to confess this, especially given everything she went through because of that bastard, but I think in another life, we would've been mother and son, free of the burdens that weigh us down. Thank you mom, for loving me, for giving me something far more precious to live for. I want you to look back on the near decaded we had together, to know that I valued and appreciate the time as your son, for the family you've given me.

Tell Grandpa Bell, that I'm sorry that I died before I could tell him how much I enjoyed the light and laughter he bought into my life. He is and will always be important to me, my death changes nothing. And for you, I'll always be your son. I'll always cherish the traditions you've passed on. On knowing I could proudly be your kid. Don't be sad, Mom, don't cry for me. Don't tear the world down, save that for the bastards who hurt you. I planned on being by your until I was old enough to get married, and you'd give me away. Regardless, I love you Mom, and I'm sorry that you recieved this at all. Celebrate the memories we made. Goodbye, may this letter reach you safely. I'm sorry.