#my anxiety tells me this person will See this Post and then doxx me via my instagram. oh well don't care enough lol

[six-of-cringe]

Ok guys so anytime you think something you want is impossible to achieve. Just think of me, and how I have just encountered a homophobic six of crows fan in the wild. Nothing is impossible you can be anything you want to be ❤️

[diarrheaworldstarhiphop]

I'm sorry to have come off the way I did. I know sending this doesn't help, but that's alright. It's the last one I'll ever send. Thanks for everything.

jesus christ verax, “…come off the way i did?”

you told me you wrote three chapters of the sci-fi book you have been eagerly working on and i went LITERALLY, SOLELY “that’s amazing! congrats!” and your immediate response was to tell me you wouldn’t show me it (fyi: i wasn’t asking) when it’s published because something something doxxing yourself to me AND THEN go on to verbosely wax poetic over the course of a few paragraphs about me as a perverse, doxxed spectacle entertainment de jour for KF and refer to my fucking parents’ careers in the midst of that (?>??>?THE FUCK??!?!!) and opine on whatever assumed neuroses i have, unprompted, like a complete maladjusted lunatic who doesn’t know how to properly engage with light conversation when it’s presented to you.Thought experiment: You approach your coworker at the winery you stress over and go “hey i did this thing with my darling GF” and they go “cool! sounds lovely!” but then you go on about how you shouldnt go into depth about it because you looked into your coworker’s life, telling him about his family tree you know about and how you don’t want to be similarly rendered an open book for telling him about that thing you did with the darling GF.” The coworker stares back at you with wide eyes like they just crossed paths with a psychopath. That’s how you often come across.

yes i may be a fucking virtual tranny this or that, one you have told that you want to save from that path (via harassment? oh, please), but at least I’m capable of responding to people online without flying into a vaguely threatening assessment of their undisclosed family details among other completely anti-social weird shit only people in the deepest sociopathic tesseract would. At least I converse like a normal, adjusted human being and not like every fucking interaction is some insane game of 4D chess you have to project your life’s stress and anger onto.

I hope you realize that me unblocking you and continuing on and off conversations with you after all that shit was something motivated by curiousity and pity towards you because it felt like you really lacked and needed someone to lean into and find solace in, given the way you had a meltdown over me blocking you in the first place. I actually ENJOY helping and massaging out people’s anxieties and you are no exception to that. Only now do i realize it is self harm to put myself out there for you, only for you to continuously harass me or dehumanize me. Jesus Christ.

Your zoomer christian saviour complex aside, you are antisocial to the core, perhaps sociopathic (as i mentioned) from your unability to separate the computer screen from the conscious beings responding to you on it. You being able to nonchalantly list doxx about me alongside unwarranted, ill informed psychological assessments to an unsettling degree of unprecedented privacy invasion – Least we all forget, that this is in response for telling you it was awesome to hear about your accomplishment – does not mean you know me as a friend, let alone me as a person.

Actually, you telling me you are 22 or whatever was quite illuminating as it explains your immaturity and inability to readily empathize or function as an full adult. Besides all that, the age gulf (not too hard for you to look up, im sure!) should indicate to you why I’m so fucking busy with wild work schedules while you leave literally 50 messages every time you come home to compulsively drink your unpacked, rammed down, issues away, begging for my attention, singing every time you see my activity go from online to away to the degree that you begin to fill my notifications with how you welcome and speak to the “green dot” as a substitute for me while im preoccupied.

I don’t want to be out being made your adoptive e>mother who you can berate and feel rest assured she won’t bite back out of unconditional love or whatever.

“ah, i knew to worry about you posting my doxx” you might be thinking rn. I hope you realize I only return the fucking favour, my guy. You speak to me as this spectacle you can freely taunt over, so here I am making a spectacle of you because you brought it to my inbox, your distress at me blocking you again.

If you are wondering why I resist calling you my friend, it’s because of annoying, disrespectful shit like this, that the level we have talked until tonight is predicated on me rolling my eyes and letting your dumb shit roll off my back. This friendship you have begged me to affirm and reassure to you as existing since you were so fraught over feeling that I was this unreciprocated friend to you… this is the absolute state of it.

However, aS yOuR mOtHeR I suppose i have to hold your hand thru explaining that friendships are built on trust and mutual respect. Guess which side of the mutual is to blame for my reluctance at hand. You actually have to put in effort to earn it, at least to a fraction of the degree you seem to put into discovering parts of my life I haven’t yielded to you like I’m some fucking viral marketing ARG.

You are so fucking exhausting. I truly hope you are not at all who you present yourself on the internet, for your and everyone’s sake. You probably also project your work stress onto everything and everyone else, it feels like. If not already, then once I’m out of your life as your negativity sponge.

Ah, and before I move on to more productive shit: Like you apologize after the fact here, but this is a pattern of yours. Only able to conceptualize you hurt others until after you are smacked upside the head.

Think about that.