#my head hurts but surprise! yaeshou content!

[jjnghe]

the 'you' i still love (and will continue to love) | yaeshou

"shou!" across the gymnasium, a voice of enthusiasm from the endless chattering of the crowds ringed in his ears. he turns, meeting gazes with a certain classmate fiddling with the long sleeves of her toga.

"yae," he responds, immediately lighting up as she quickly approaches. as she drew closer, he could spot a trace of anxiety flashing in her eyes-- and the way her hands trembled ever so slightly did not go unnoticed.

if it was anybody else, shouta would have simply ignored it. but hishikawa yaeko wasn't just 'anybody'.

and so his brows furrow, a questioning frown forming on his face at the sight. "what happened?" his words leak with concern.

alerted, yaeko's demeanour stuttered and immediately shifted to one of bashfulness, as if she was masking whatever emotion she had let out. "no- nothing happened!" she forces an airy laugh out of her in an attempt to lighten the atmosphere. it came to be futile as how shouta quirks an eyebrow, silently urging her to come clean.

yaeko immediately felt herself shrink under his scrutiny; but beyond all odds, she had managed to muster a breath, as if carefully considering her next words. "i just... needed to tell you something."

oh, how the very same shouta who usually never seemed to give a care grew more and more curious by the second. he then tugs her by the forearm, making her follow him until they were in a secluded corner, separated from the hundreds of people crowding the venue.

"what is it that you wanted to tell me?" he asks, finally facing her. the girl in front of him hesitates, visibly faltering after realizing just how seriously he's treating this.

if only yaeko's eyes weren't glued to her feet, she could've caught how shouta's gaze impossibly softens with worry. he steps closer. "you can tell me anything, you know."

those very same words were the ones that have ignited a flame of bravery in yaeko. she takes a deep breath, head tilting upwards to meet him face to face.

it was truly now or never.

"i- i like you, hoshino shouta!"

it was a voice not too quiet, nor too loud for the people afar to hear.

"since we became classmates in our first year, i liked you; and i enjoyed every moment we spent together for these past three years. you're so smart and handsome and just-- just leagues ahead of me." countless words fell out of her mouth, like a neverending waterfall. "you don't know how much i admire you, shou."

people would say that it was odd for someone to develop an affection for someone so closed off and mysterious like shouta, but throughout these three years did he reveal sides of himself only yaeko could see.

it was these little things where she'd see the shouta who shares his lunch with her when she forgets to bring her own, the shouta who only ever says 'good morning' when it's to her, or the shouta who offers to share his notes with her despite them being in an academic rivalry with each other.

it's the way how he cared for her in these subtle ways that had yaeko fall for him even more. all of this pining had culminated into a confession by the end of their highschool days, the latter not bearing to harbour these feelings in secret anymore.

the words she uttered held a trace of hope; that maybe, just maybe shouta felt the same way.

(...)

huh.

an underlying tension quickly formed in the atmosphere, similar to how yaeko's uneasiness started to rise at that very same moment.

she shuts her eyes, still anticipating a response from the boy she's liked-- no, loved for three years.

(...)

silence.

yaeko's heart drops.

as much as she'd rather go blind forever, the ravenette slowly opens her eyes. she was met with the sight of shouta, looking much more distressed than he did the last time she spoke.

his gaze was turned downcast, and his lack of response told yaeko all she didn't want to know.

oh.

maybe confessing wasn't a good idea after all.

of course someone of shouta's level would turn down someone average like her.

"i'm sorry-- i'm sorry i," before the world could take a turn for the worse, yaeko follows her words up, taking several steps backward and away from him. her voice cracked at the final syllable; and she could almost feel the tears prick her eyes. "i shouldn't have said that. i'll just go."

'i'll just go to save you the embarrassment of rejecting me.'

was she stupid for feeling this way? was it the right decision to tell him? the fresh tear in her heart yearns for answers; but all it felt in the meantime was emptiness.

"wait."

just as shouta reached out for her, yaeko was already gone, lost within the sea of people once more.