#not seen: trixie cringe in the background

[leonamelody3]

MILK!!!

[otterlydeerlightful]

Sportarobbie: War AU + Proposal Fic

Totally did not reread this one...completely raw first draft here! XD

Robbie covered his head with a yelp as something exploded nearby. The man couldn’t keep his knees from knocking together as he did his best to shrink into the shadow of the wall, the only thing that stood between him and the heathens currently trying to destroy them. He heard something sail overhead and cringed, whimpering below.

“It’s okay, Robbie. You’re okay,” a warm voice assured him as a gentle weight came to rest over his shoulders.

He looked up at the beautiful pair of blue eyes gazing at him and the battlefield, however briefly, faded into the background. He wouldn’t have made it this far without Sportacus. It was such a strange thing to think that he and the relentlessly optimistic fool had made such a good pair. He loved the daft elf, but couldn’t for the life of him understand what had possessed Sportacus to initially ask him on a date. Who could have predicted that agreeing would have been the best decision of his life? Robbie was thankful to have Sportacus by his side now.

“You’re safe, Robbie,” his boyfriend assured him. Sportacus rubbed his back gently as he spoke. “We’re safe back here.”

“It’s only a matter of time,” the man choked out. “We can’t hold them back forever!”

“Then it’s a good thing this won’t last forever!” Sportacus said with a smile.

The both jumped as another projectile sailed over their heads and hit a nearby tree head-on. Sportacus instinctively shielded Robbie from the attack. The man below him swallowed and clung to his beloved elf even after the danger had passed. This was silly. He shouldn’t let Sportacus take the brunt of everything, but he was such a coward. A pathetic, lazy coward. He had to be braver than this…if not for himself, then for the man he loved.

“H-how can you say that?”

“Because it has to end some time, right? Someone has to win.”

Robbie stared, slackjawed. How the elf could be so blasé about war was beyond him. Maybe Sportacus had snapped from having seen too much carnage. Robbie fleetingly wished he could join him. Something hit the wall behind them and Robbie yelped in terror, diving forward and covering his head. Sportacus gently pulled him back up and wrapped him in his arms.

“It’s okay, Robbie. I promise.” His boyfriend paused, rubbing his back. “I think you are getting a little too upset, Robbie. Maybe we should—”

“Upset?” he asked in disbelief. Robbie flubbed for a few seconds before throwing his arms wide. “Sportacus, look at where we are!”

Sportacus blinked. He didn’t seem to know how to respond.

Another projectile flew overhead, exploding into the ground some distance away. Robbie whimpered. That, somehow, brought a decisive gleam to the elf’s eyes and Sportacus sat back on his heels to reach for their waiting ammunition.

Oh no—  Oh no, what was he doing?!

“Sportacus!”

“I…think we should to end this, Robbie.”

“End…?”

Sportacus nodded. “I think that this has gone on long enough.”

The elf reached for the homemade catapult sitting beside him. It was a device of Robbie’s own design. A hybrid of a giant slingshot and a real catapult, really. It was easy lightweight, easy to use, but required a clear shot and precious seconds to properly aim at a target. And Sportacus was about to use it.

“Sportaflop, no!”

“Robbie?”

He froze, his heart pounding in his ears as the war raged around them. This was it, wasn’t it? One way or another, this was going to end...and it might be the end of them, too. What if they didn’t make it home? What if…what if this was it? Robbie’s mind suddenly filled with flashes of a life that never was, a thousand what ifs and words left unsaid. This might be his only chance. Their only chance. He needed to know. If they were going to face down the very real possibility of The End, he needed to know.

“Sp-Sportacus…when…when this is all over…”

His beloved waited patiently.

“When this is all over,” Robbie began again, “Would you…would you consider…”

“What, Robbie?”

“Would you marry me?” he blurted out.

Sportacus’ eyes went wide. “Wh-what?”

Robbie trembled, for once not in response to the carnage all around them. “It’s just…I love you! I love you more than I thought I could ever love anyone and in spite of everything you love me back! You’re incredible and-and caring, and understanding, and you let me be myself, and just…y-you’re incredible, you stupid elf, and if we both make it out of here alive…I-I want to marry you. If you’ll have me.”

Sportacus immediately leaned over and pressed his lips against his love’s. Robbie melted under the man’s fingertips as they gently curled around the back of his neck in a loving caress. The pair parted to see one another again and, much to Robbie’s elation and relief, Sportacus was all smiles. His eyes practically sparkled.

“Of course I would marry you, Robbie. I love you!”

He felt himself smile, lips twitching slightly and his chin quivering. “I-I love you too, Sportacus…”

His partner—his fiancé—chuckled. “That’s good, then, isn’t it?” he teased before leaning back and tightening his grip on the catapult still in one hand. “If we’re going to get married, then I think we need to finish this as soon as possible!”

What? No—

“What are you doing?”

Sportacus stood quickly, ammunition loaded and ready by the time he was fully upright. He took the barest moment to focus on his target, and released. Robbie couldn’t breathe. Time moved slowly as he scrambled, limbs abnormally sluggish and heavy, to try and pull his love out of harm’s way. Sportacus’ aim was true, and he had fired far more quickly than most on the planet would be capable, but the movement hadn’t been instantaneous. And the moment he had reared his head, the enemy had honed in and fired a preemptive response. He was hit square in the chest. Robbie heard his own voice crying out in horror as the elf let out a surprised grunt and, as if in slow motion, stumbled backward and fell.

Robbie’s world shattered as he watched Sportacus hit the ground. Oh God. Oh God, no…was he…was he…?

“Yeah! Take that, Sportacus! We win!” a small but triumphant voice cheered from somewhere nearby.

Sportacus sat up with a laugh, his chest dripping wet and covered in the remnant of the exploded water balloon that clung to his uniform. He laughed and jumped to his feet, hands on his hips as he looked over the wall at the enemy. “That was a great shot, Trixie. Congratulations!”

“Nobody beats The Trickster when it comes to throwing water balloons,” the young girl bragged before high-fiving her teammates.

Robbie stared up at Sportacus. While still overwhelmed, his current reality slowly began to seep into his consciousness. Water balloon…oh, right. A game….it had all been a game. Robbie had been so elated to be included that he had completely immersed himself in his role. A little too much, it seemed. He—and Sportacus—had never been in any real danger at all. Sportacus was safe, he was safe, and….Robbie had….oh dear.

Without another word, Robbie scrambled to his feet and spun on his heel toward home. He was sure his face was as red as he felt it was, and the man didn’t know how to deal with that right now. At best, Robbie had just made a complete fool of himself with his stupid, spur-of-the-moment question.

The farther he got from the park, the worse Robbie felt. Sportacus had most likely thought his proposal all part of the game, a silly declaration of…nothing. He had spoken before having the time to thoroughly think over his own proposition, but Robbie found himself surprisingly devastated that his boyfriend’s response had been part of their game rather than genuine. The more he thought about the idea of marriage, at least to Sportacus, the more Robbie realized he really did want it. He wanted it…but didn’t see how on earth the elf would ever say yes for real. God, that had been humiliating.

“Robbie!”

The tall man cringed as the quick patter-patter of elven boots quickly came up from behind.

“Robbie, wait.”

He sighed, but did as he was asked and waited for Sportacus to catch up to him. His love’s brow was furrowed with worry as he approached. Sportacus touched Robbie’s arm and silently asked permission to meet his boyfriend’s gaze.

“You left so fast, Robbie. Is something wrong? It is not because we lost, is it? If it is, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have made myself such a target.”

He kept silent and bit the inside of his cheek to channel his nervous embarrassment.

“…Robbie?”

A stupid thought crossed his mind. Robbie Rotten may be a genius, but that didn’t mean all of his ideas were brilliant. He wanted….no, needed to know if Sportacus would have said yes for real. But he didn’t know how to ask. Robbie wanted to know, yet he was terrified to know. Why did he have to get so caught up in that stupid game?

“What has you so upset?” his beautiful elf asked in obvious concern.

He swallowed, unsure what might come out of his own mouth until he heard it for himself. “You didn’t do anything wrong. You never do anything wrong…it’s not fair, really.”

Sportacus just looked confused.

“I don’t…I don’t do well with blatant face-value stuff!” Robbie whined, his arms flailing with emotion while he spoke. “It’s hard! It’s-it’s easier to just…you know….!”

The elf nodded. “I know, Robbie. I understand.”

“No, you don’t. I…it’s not just the disguises! Or-or the playing…it’s….ugh!” Robbie pulled at his hair in frustration, ruining his perfect pompadour. “This is stupid! I can’t believe I actually…arg, forget it! I’m going home…”

Sportcus was staring at him, eyes widening even as Robbie spoke. He grabbed Robbie’s shoulder when his boyfriend turned to leave.

“Wait…Robbie.”

He winced, but let the elf hold him in place.

“Did…did you mean it…when you said that you wanted to get married?”

Robbie’s stomach was in horrible, painful knots. He looked down at his feet. “Th-that depends if you’d laugh in my face or not,” he ended up mumbling.

The silence that followed did not instill much confidence. Robbie sighed and was about to apologize for his stupid impulsive question, but Sportacus spoke first.

“You meant that?” he asked in an uncharacteristically quiet voice. “You…really want to marry…me?”

“I know we were supposed to just be pretending—” And maybe he had done that a little too well in the moment. “—but I did mean everything I said. Y-you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me and…and I really like the idea of being with you for, well, forever...I know I just blurted it all out like an idiot and I doubt that kind of thing is even on your radar—heaven knows I even surprised myself on this one—but…”

“Yes.”

Robbie halted mid-sentence. Robbie blinked a few times and quickly looked up at his elf. He had to have heard that wrong. Except Sportacus’ smile was as bright as the sun itself, and his smile was made of nothing but loving contentment. He reached up and cupped Robbie’s cheek in his palm. The taller of the two suddenly couldn’t breathe. Robbie’s chest felt tight.

“W-what?”

“Yes, Robbie. I would be honored to marry you. I love you more than anything in the world and I would love to grow old with you. I said yes to you then because I had wanted it to be real. My answer is the same.”

Sportacus leaned in for a kiss that Robbie was only too happy to meet. The elf soon enveloped him in his strong arms and Robbie cradled the back of the elf’s head in return. Suddenly, Robbie didn’t feel quite so foolish as he had mere moments ago.

......I know, I know--I cheated! But this was the only way my brain would let me picture this scenario and I ran with it.