#not the best quality...but i just needed these scenes in gif form...specifically big ass gif form lol

[hedaswarrior]

Maca and Barbara in the TVyNovelas interview [video]

[spacewizardtrek]

WARNING: This post will ruin you. Like Medusa; look at your peril.

But here is is. It’s the one you’ve all been waiting for.

Kirk bod appreciation #7: The RIDICULOUSLY BEAUTIFUL FACE. A highly technical and academic review.

This is a rather nebulous one. And not, on the face of it (pardon the pun) very philosophical, as it’s essentially about Kirk being stupidly pretty. This post probably will (it will) descend into just screaming and sobbing, but there will be, I promise, *some* meaningful insight into the meaning of ‘beauty’ and textual analysis of its role herein.

Beauty is subjective. But look at him. It’s not just being aesthetic, but it’s the *way* he’s aesthetic. Here I might repeat myself a bit, but stay with me. I may have mentioned before once hearing him described as ‘beautiful in the way women are often described as beautiful’. He is PRETTY. He is indeed often conveyed in the way the women stereotypically (not necessarily rightly) are on screen: perfect, smooth skin; soft, big eyes; luscious lips (his body is sensually curvaceous and furthermore it’s emphasised). He’s not androgynous though. He’s masculine. And yet I still sense what was meant in describing him as ‘beautiful in the way women are often described as beautiful’. He is a rather uncommon form of gender fuckery. He is a form of stereotype-subversion not commonly acknowledged. He seems to be everything at once, ALL THE GENDER; combines whichever traits he desires from those categories, and yet is undeniably a man and masculine whatever the ingredients. HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE, one might wonder. The fact of the matter is, that it IS. And it teaches us something.

The FUCK. nO. You are not allowed to be that pretty, and you are NOT allowed to look at her like that. We’re trying to have a SENSIBLE DISCUSSION here.

Sorry, that was a non-sequitur / nothing to do with what we learn by Kirk’s embodiment; I was just ambushed by my own gif. Only the control of a Vulcan. ONLY that could possibly withstand this onslaught. And even that won’t hold up forever AS WE WELL KNOW

God.

This is going well, as you can tell.

OK. So, it’s claimed he has Eyes and Stupidly Long Weakness-Inducing Eyelashes. You know, from all that fanfic that goes on about ‘big, sparkling eyes’ and him fanning his ‘long, copper eyelashes’. I mean, yeah right, tropey mc tropeface -

IT’S TRUE. HE IS LITERALLY AN ANIME PRINCESS.

There are some moments where he just BLINKS and, how to describe it...how does a BLINK have that effect. It’s NOT ALLOWED.

...I’m sorry. It IS allowed. All of it. I am not shaming you your beauty. Never change, Jim. Never.

OK. I’m ok. 3 pics down, we can get through this -

Oh you are joking. Stop.

I don’t understand how anyone can be so beautiful. Life is a lie. Reality is fake -

- you did NOT just turn your big anime eyes on Spock. You do know this is why he ran away to PURGE ALL HIS EMOTIONS?

And for that matter, you know when Kirk looks his most beautiful? Literally WHEN HE’S LOOKING AT SPOCK. Spock talks some bollocks and Kirk just sparkles like a fucking angel:

Unbelievable. But utterly undeniable.

Sigh. Moving on.

Oh - someone once suggested I talk about The Lips. Lips are so wonderful aren’t they. So many wonderful things they can do.

And Kirk’s. They’re there in every picture: perfect, rosy, soft and madness-inducing. My advice is just...don’t think about them. But since I’ve been asked to draw attention to them, well, you’ve just sealed your fate. Scroll down at your peril.

I WARNED YOU.

I am pulling NO punches.

I’ve seen this great meme going around:

Excuse me though....CUTE?

That’s the understatement of the 23rd century.

Try impossibly beautiful, mind and body: heart of solid gold, soul deep in love with you. Those eyes and all their passion burned into your memories a thousand times over, along with - maybe, suggestibly, idk I’m extrapolating from all the goddamn tension - even the one unforgettable time he laid between lily-white sheets and gave himself to you; every gift of the mind, body and soul - and your ostensibly-forced Vulcan conditioning, that completely ignored how incompatible one part of you was with it, caused so much dissonance that you thought the only possible course of action for you both to survive was to BREAK UP, tear yourself from this beauty and love and sweetness to PURGE ALL EMOTIONS because nothing, nothing equipped you for this; you were set up specifically to fail, and fail hard in the face of transcendental love and beauty by those who rejected such things and didn’t understand you and could never imagine this for you and who instead of helping your beautiful neurodivergent brain flourish taught you to repress and caused you pain and shame and Gol was so hard and Kirk was so sad, so very sad and depressed and hurt and yet he couldn’t stop loving you with a bond so strong he called to you across the stars and Gol was all for naught yet you still didn’t know how to live like this, it was torture, torture until the mind meld with the living machine flashed your BIOS and you knew, love.exe was suddenly running with no errors and he came after you and held you and you held hands and, and -

.

*sobbing*

.

just...give me a moment

.

YOU WONDER WHAT THE SUBTEXT (FRIKKIN’ MAIN TEXT) OF STAR TREK: THE MOTION PICTURE WAS ALL ABOUT???

The pain?? The angst?? The two logical entities seeking contact, love, THIS SIMPLE FEELING? That fucking moment when spock walks on the bridge and the only way he can control himself is to be SUPER Vulcan, while his love gazes at him with those EYES, fucking huge and glittering and hurt and loving?? Is it so much a mystery what memories these two are carrying, what’s behind the searing tension???????

Love him. Love him Spock. Take him in your arms and love him. He’s for you. All for you. Fucking hell guys. The fuck. This movie.

.

ok.

ok I can do this

CAN U NOT

those damn eyes I swear

It’s obviously not all just superficial physical beauty. What IS beauty? Narratively we do sometimes find this ‘prettiness’ enhanced and emphasized like the old vaseline lens to set the tone of a scene (he’s vulnerable and delicate, or someone’s indeed in love with him so we see their ‘lens’ on him); but it is somewhat intangible and nebulous and changeable. I don’t think aesthetic beauty, if one deems it so, on its own, would be enough for the likes of Spock (indeed, no woman could charm him thusly); it's about something deeper. It’s about who he is. Who he is inside: the beautiful AND the imperfect. How his good and bad - how his ‘all’ -  chimes with Spock’s 'all’. The Enemy Within deals with this, and shows how Spock loves all of Kirk, wants him complete, with both his light and shadow. The beauty of all of us is this totality and variance, not one intangible quality.

I’ll bet Spock’s parents knew immediately. Can you imagine Sarek trying to be a total bitch over Kirk, having heard the rumours and just wanting to have one more thing to reject Spock over, immediately projecting onto Kirk as some blow-up pretty-boy and how Incredibly More Disappointing My Son Is for being Obviously In Love With Stupid Illogical Human Doll Face Bubble Butt Bimbo Captain, and Amanda’s like, stfu, let me remind you Kirk is actually a Fucking Amazing Highly Decorated Starship Captain who Saves Your Life and don’t you DARE resent him just because he’s got tits/ass/tum/lips that won’t quit and is obviously the freakin’ sun Spock orbits. Mr ‘I married a human but that was special because it was logical’ or some bullshit. How is Kirk an illogical choice? I mean literally, Spock is a Science Genius™ on the federation’s FLAGSHIP whose well-matched Genius Captain™ understands him, accepts him, brings the best out of him, helps him fulfil his whole potential and is in love with him in the deepest and purest way and will be his bonded soulmate for ALL OF TIME and that fucking sour-faced bih at the start of that ep, ffs.

Of course Amanda stays in touch with Kirk, adores the fuck out of him, sends him old Vulcan lit on t’hy’la bonds (yes sarek, a T’HY’LA bond, so revered freakin’ poets write about it) etc because frankly her son could do FAR FUCKING WORSE.

FAR. FUCKING. WORSE.

Don’t...just don’t slip the bod into the equation, the face is enough for one post. We’re all in therapy for this already, let’s not relapse.

Oh, what’s the use. I’m gonna die. This is it. This is like the Monty Python joke that is so funny it kills you. This man is lethal. I need to stop this thread and purge all my emotions

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

That’s it. I’m dead. You’re dead. We’re all dead.

I hope, however, seeing this post was worth it. See you at Gol everyone.

.

.

The Forbidden Texts, DO NOT READ:

Kirk bod appreciation #6: The Curves. The Front. The...chest. AND THE AMAZING GREEN WRAP

Kirk bod appreciation #5: The Paws

Kirk bod appreciation #4: The Curves. The Back. Poetry in motion.  

Kirk bod appreciation #3: Season 3 (Part 1)

Kirk bod appreciation #2b: The Gluteus Maximus

Kirk bod appreciation #2a: The Gluteus Maximus

Kirk bod appreciation #1: The Tum

[mycarlydotcom]

Looking Back at iCarly

In...5...4...3...2...

Hello internet! This blog lives on, and so do I! My Nickelodeon heart still beats, and here I am in 2019, having recently finished re-watching iCarly…again. Admittedly, there is a part me still clinging to this fandom and I don’t think it will ever go away. So, I recently sat my grown ass adult-self down to re-watch the series, and I feel the desire to just talk about it.

Let’s preface everything with an acknowledgement to nostalgia and the impact it has on how we view things we enjoyed in the past. Nostalgia is typically viewed through rose colored lenses that disguise the truth about whatever it is we remember so fondly. I realize this, and fully acknowledge that nostalgia is probably the biggest reason for my enjoyment during this re-watch; but whether it was nostalgia or not, I have no shame in saying that I loved it. I loved every single second of it. Yeah it was a little cringey at first, (Honestly, that’s to be expected when looking back at shows like these with more mature eyes) but that feeling settled pretty fast, and it didn’t take long for me to fall right back in love with the show.

I love this show. I watched it frequently as a preteen into my teenage years (Around the ages of 11-15 I’d say). I watched until about Season 3 but I ended up falling off with it as I grew older; so I never saw anything from Season 4 onward during its initial run. Fast forward a few years later, and somewhere around 2013 an iCarly clip found its way into my YouTube suggestions. I don’t remember the specific clip, but it had something to do with Sam and Freddie (It may have been the elevator scene from iLove You). It caught my attention because I always remembered thinking that Sam and Freddie would end up together. Curiously enough, I clicked it, and that served as the impetus to make me watch the entire series. I watched it all, and I loved it. I loved it so much that I even made this blog dedicated to it, and other shows cut from the same cloth. I had my heart stolen by Sam and Freddie, and obsessed over the pairing like many others had done before me. I became so attached to the characters, and as corny as it sounds, I felt like they were my friends. I just loved it all. I was hooked, and the series known as iCarly ended up leaving a lasting impression on me. Going on that journey was such a blast; but like all good things, it eventually came to end. After a while I started using this blog less and less. I slowly stopped watching reruns of old Nickelodeon shows, and I eventually fell off completely. So now, we fast forward one more time and here we are in 2019, I have watched the series again, and it turns out that I still harbor that deep connection to it that I had before. The fandom still lives within me, and I’ve realized it will never go away. It is always going hold a place in heart.

Now that my long-winded introduction is over, let’s move on to talking about the show itself. Upon this most recent viewing of the series, I will say that in my humble opinion, the show peaks in Season 3. While I may love the series as a whole, I cannot deny that its glory days are definitely in its earlier years. During this re-watch, I noticed a subtle dip in the quality of show from Season 4 onward. It’s not like it falls off a cliff or anything, it was still very enjoyable, but it definitely felt like they were losing control. This trend continued in Season 5, and parlayed right into the final season as well. By the time you reach the end, it’s apparent they were desperate for ideas, or were just ready to move on. Again, it’s not awful, but it’s not firing on all cylinders like it was in the earlier seasons. There are a plethora of issues we could point to when discussing this, but I think the biggest culprit to the show’s decline in quality was the “ships.” That entire craze definitely had a negative impact on the series overall; even as a “Seddier,” I can admit that. I’ve actually previously, briefly discussed (Here) how I believe “shipping,” directly changed the original, intended story of Sam and Freddie; and I still believe that. The creative direction was undoubtedly influenced by the divide in the audience, and I don’t think that can be disputed. But regardless of the slight dip in quality, I will say that iCarly is still tremendous overall, and Seasons 4 through 6 still have their moments and some great episodes. Season 6 itself recovers wonderfully by the end, with the last five episodes of the series serving as a splendid return to form for the show.

iCarly was one of the most successful Nickelodeon shows for a reason…because it truly is great. In many ways it was a glimpse into the future when you think about the power of the internet and its ability to influence and create success nowadays. It capitalized on that ever growing popularity of the internet, and did so wonderfully. Who didn’t want to have their own version of the iCarly web show? Everyone did, it was the coolest concept. Couple that with the amazing cast they gathered to play the character’s we all came to love, and the show had a recipe for brilliance. 

Let’s actually talk about casting on this show because it is absolutely tremendous…

Miranda wonderfully transitioned from the devious little sister, Megan, on Drake & Josh, to the lovable protagonist known as Carly, and she was perfect for the role. Carly is portrayed as the best friend that anyone could ever ask for, and Miranda fills that role so believably well. You truly feel that she cares deeply for all of her friends, and honestly, I think that’s just an extension of Miranda herself. All you have to do is listen to any of her fellow cast member’s talk about her, and it’s not hard to understand why she played Carly so well.

Then there is Jennette; what else can I say about Jennette McCurdy that I haven’t already gushed about on this blog? I adore her to pieces, and her on screen counterpart known as Sam Puckett, I adore even more. I’ve heard Jennette be critical of the show and the role she played, especially as she’s gotten older and distanced herself from the Nickelodeon bubble, but I honestly think she doesn’t give herself enough credit for pulling off Sam the way she did. There is nobody else they could have cast to play that role better than her. There are many layers to Sam Puckett, and while the show tends to shy away from truly fleshing that out, we still get glimpses of it throughout the series. It’s the biggest reason why I love Sam so much, and Jennette excellently captures that contrast within the character. Sam is a tough as they come, and rarely displays compassion or vulnerability, but underneath her rough exterior is a wonderful person with a heart of gold. Much like that character, it often seems that there is a lot more than what’s displayed on the surface with Jennette as well, curiously enough. She herself, is somewhat of an enigma (which I plan on discussing one day as well). The character, and actor are very similar in that regard, and I think that’s why Sam was so great. For the purpose of comedy, Sam is a totally over-exaggerated character, and much more of a tomboy than Jennette is in real life, but beneath all the comedic hyperbole, there are some striking parallels between the character and the actor.

Of course, there is Nathan Kress, who played the role of Freddie, and did a splendid job capturing the loveable tech nerd Freddie was; especially in the earlier years. Nathan also deserves major props for continuing to pull the Freddie character off as time went on because let’s be honest, Nathan matured into quite the handsome young fella right in the midst of this show airing. It was funny juxtaposition to see him still have to portray Freddie, as Sam might say, a “nub,” when he very clearly wasn’t. So again, props to him because he still made it believable that Freddie was just a big dork who struggled with girls and whatnot despite his dapper, physical appearance.

Who doesn’t love Jerry Trainor? He comes across as the most fun person to be around, and I have to imagine that working with him is a total joy. All you have to do is watch the blooper episodes, iBloop and iBloop 2, and you can see just how much fun he makes the work environment for all of his fellow actors. He, as Spencer, is low key probably everyone’s favorite character. He was the perfect choice to portray Spencer, and while he does all the whacky humor and eccentric behavior perfectly, he also captures the moments where Spencer needs to be a responsible adult, arguably even better.

And last but not least, Noah Munck as Gibby. From starting as a reoccurring character with a strange quirk where he persistently took his shirt off , to transitioning into the main cast where announcing his own name in exaggerated fashion became a staple of the show, Noah took this peculiar character and brought him to life in the most entertaining way possible. To quote Gibby himself, Noah made the show, “a lot of fun,” and provided some of the best laughs in series.

I cannot say enough good things about iCarly. It is an all-timer as far as Nickelodeon shows are concerned, and those who were part of the fandom know just how special it was. I’ll forever hold it in my heart, and remember the joy it brought me whenever I “need a laugh, cheer, or random dance.”

And, we're clear...