#not to doom post but oh gosh thats bad

[jjramblesjj]

The Boys Season 4

(Incomplete Commentary)

(Series Dropped)

I will be watching the eps at whatever times I happen to and this post will help me list my issues in real time. Spoilers of Course are ahead.

Ep 1.

33:46 - A love triangle? Thats such a tired ass direction to go in if they are. Frenchie is literally a polyamorous ass nigga. This has been an established aspect of his character.

39:10 - I refuse to believe any smart nigga would willingly hang around Homelander's ass. That literally is the most craziest shit ever. Like cure some wild ass disease or something.

Sage: (Actually Considering Throwing it All Away Like She not talking to fuckin HOMELANDER)

I truly will be amazed if she lasts up to the last 3 episodes of this season.

42:11 Oh thank fuckin God. I thought this show was boutta be on some degrassi shit, but we good.

42:30 (Hears Denzel Playing From a Distance)

46:07 I kind of gleamed over this, but Noirs alive? is it just a different guy? Retcon? that'd be super fuckin weird.

50:18 This is what I mean when I say the show keeps spitting in your face. Like the series made clear the show isn't friendly to nobody in like the first 2 seasons, but did I really need to see a queer person get beat up by a bunch of white supremacists with this framing?

"Just don't watch the show."

(touches together index fingers and puts knees together)👉👈

But I wanna see what Happeeeensss!

Like.......While i'm sure its not as bad as Berserk (hasn't seen Berserk) Its the same effect of there being like...This type of violence just turning into voyeurism for the writers at some point and I don't respect it, because the visuals are just so bad for life at times.

(Untimed) Its wild the first important black women in the show ends up working for Homelander on some straight coona palooza timing.

53:42 OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THEY GAVE THE FISH A VOICEEEE OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!

58:29 bruh........

Anyway............That is indeed a first episode of The Boys.

Ep 2

3:32 I'm fuckin dead

3:48 Ohhhh, so it is just some guy.

12:41 FNAF

13:29 Holy Fucking Shit he Sucks.

18:31 Why is he even alive? Literally survived all 3 seasons just to get super into his abuser bag again.

20:20 [Pauses] ?????

24:05 PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

24:22 Okay, This might actually be my favorite joke out of the entire show. The character choice makes too much sense.

38:24

38:49 That Nigga With The Camera:

41:07 I hate this trope so much. Like was there really not a more clever way to get out of this? You are already suspending so much disbelief when watching shows or movies like this and what not, but the lack of creativity does kind of stick out like a sore thumb with moments like this.

41:48 - 42:27 huh......This truly is a scene.

42:46 WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY HAVE A ROCK VERSION OF HAVA NAGILA?!?!?!?!?!?!?

43:56 "ZIONIST CABAL"!!?!?!??!?!?!/......bruh

(untimed) also why are they just holding them? The entire sequence of this fight has been questionable on a technical level, but I don't want to cinema sins it up so I'll just stop talking about it for now.

(also untimed) Homelanders got some wild ass canines. They've been there for the entire series, but its just a detail I find very interesting if that is suppose to hold any thematic purpose under its subtlety.

48:27 Oh my gosh...........That might be the most evil thing he's done this entire series.

51:01 Ooooooo, Interesting. This the exact sort of conflict I wanted. It took 4 seasons, but AY...........the first 3 were pretty foundational in their own ways.....Maybe 3 could've been handled a bit better. I hope they handle this character conflict good and don't DOOM Patrol it up......(I like doom patrol btw I just hate a lot of its later story beats and redemption arcs)

53:31 Okay....This scene........I dislike the romance dynamic of "partially put together black character" and "piece of shit stress-inducing white character", because there's a stink of white mediocrity (in acceptability) in that balance, BUT...................My understanding of why someone would ship MM and Butcher has risen from 0% to 1% with this scene alone.

That was a Fun episode. This ACTUAL A Train redemption Arc really boutta be a stinker. Like there's no way he doesn't die this season if this is the direction their going. Oh, and the Deep............I really don't understand why he's still around. Like no ones really bodied this nigga yet? Also I didn't like how the last season used Ryan's character. This setup for him seems interesting, but weird, because it still doesn't make sense really how we got here.

Ep 3

1:07 "God-less NonBinary Socialist" Kinda a hitter.....What if homelander just sounded like Jordon Peterson? Jordon Peterson does give off Milk fetish vibes if I'm gonna be real.

"Yummers"🐸

6:30 :O

10:53 That's fucking horrible.....And there's no fuckin way they switched to an injustice knockoff game right after. Someone really needs to find these writers and cause nefarious misfortune upon them.

12:04 Jesus Fucking Christ

24:48 Really?

29:37 I Love this scene so much. Almost got me to cry. I swear if he didn't do that after saying all that shit I might have quit watching this entire show. Like oh my gosh the character growth is palpable.

31:15 DIRTTTYYYYY!!!! they did her dirty as fuck.

(We are so, Not Fucking Back Right Now)

34:12 What?

34:13 Theres no Way they're trying to make this a moment....

34:14 Theres just no fuckin way.....

34:15 NIGGA SHE'S A GROWN ASS WOMEN!?!?!?!?!!? HELLLO??!?!?!?!?! HI!!?!!??!!? like..............It is fucked up and I'd get being angry, but this entire setup doesn't make any sense to me unless I'm somehow missing something...........Like what is this?

34:26 "people don't change" Theres no fucking way you are getting son'd by a Racist for being 13 and talking like a 13-year-old at Your grown ass Age.....

...............This actually sucks...........Like thats trash writing......Like theres no way that it.........Right?

42:01 Damn Jesus.

51:32 What the FUCK are these writers on right now?

Nah, because

1. He should be Dead

2. Writers have officially wrote 2 black women getting Rawed by The Worst White Men on Earth.

3. The only other black women in this show just keep tallying points for the coon-o-meter

4. They're literally giving everything to the Deep Right now. Its already unjustifiable, but its even MORE so if this nigga don't get clapped this season.

Like.....Whats actually going on right now? Where Nubian Prince at? That nigga sick or something? This is fuckin horrendous......Niggas really blicked the Intel lady minding her business before this Guy. It's truly disrespectful as fuck the tomfoolery happening before my eyes right now.

.............tch...........I think this ep has like a balance of "what the fuck are you talking about?" and "oh my gosh this scene is great" that makes me just lenient enough to say its not entirely bad. Like I loved that Butcher and Ryan scene so much, but then they

Killed Chill Surveillance Lady

Made some silly ass conflict up between Starlight and racist women

Allowed the Deep to Win

Somehow made Homelander not hear Hughie's heartbeat directly above him?

Among other things I probably missed. Its just...........I really hope they prove my assumptions wrong on where they may be going with this........I just.........Ya I hope this shit doesn't turn into degrassi. Thats all.

(Dropped)

[botanicallyinclinednerd]

Merlin season 5 episode 6:

*has tissues ready* I'm not at all prepared for this. I know the end result but I'm not prepared.

Awww they're visiting their dad!

Gwen and the knights!!! Oh this is lovely, I'm rewatching it on repeat before the rest of the episode ruins it for me forever

FUCK OFF MORGANA

Oh gosh, my boys!! My heart skipped a beat, fuck. See, knowing they live doesn't matter when I see them in danger like this.

"By all rights they should be dead" *distressed sounds*

Yes he is Gwen, he really is that dumb.

Oh wow, they recovered quickly

The scene in the forest with Elyan and Arthur actually killed me. It hurt me so bad.

One: that scared the shit out of me. Two: thats why the snake bites didn't kill them when they should have

(I realized something post episode. Arthur says of the dark tower "its said the mere mention of it can bring doom to any of those who hear it" Well, Leon and Percival were the ones who saw it in their dreams, but they didn't hear the mention of it. They are the ones who mentioned it, who spoke of it. The others, who heard it? All died. Except Merlin of course, but his doom was failing Arthur and existing alone for centuries. And its really genius foreshadowing, but im bitter as hell about it)

The only non distressing thing about this episode so far was them visiting their fathers grave and shooting the shit before Morgana appeared

GWAINE 🤣 omg I needed that. "I was dreaming about a cheese that tasted of apple pie. Anyone else have that dream?" *Leon just staring at him like what the actual fuck*

Shit. Thats that shit that made Uther go bonkers

Mmm. I like how each of them responded to continuing. Obviously, Elyan's reason is shes his sister, but then we had Percival with sense of duty: shes the Queen. Then we have Leon who has known Gwen for years, since they were kids: Shes his friend. Then Gwaine being the comedic relief and his usual flippant self talking about fairy tales. And Merlin reminding Arthur that he made a promise and he doesn't go back on those. It fits very well and I just appreciate it a lot.

Calm down Gwaine

Oh. Is. Is Gwen legitimately brainwashed.

I. I do NOT like that Elyan is being showed to her. Fuck. If my theory is right and Gwen is brainwashed into killing Elyan, I will be so upset. (Oh thank goodness)

Oh baby

"Which one?" Oh oh! I know, I know! Pick me pick me! *dramatic crying*

Gwen needs a hug. She needs several hugs

Baby no. There you go baby. Probably should have gone with her to get out anyway, but good for not succumbing.

Nooooooo.

Why is Percival always getting hit by arrows and shit? He gets injured a lot by projectiles

See, the ignoring of the cardinal rule of horror movies: never split up, finally did one of them in.

"For a moment, I didn't think I was going to win" thats cause you didn't baby. You're dying

There are tears in my eyes FUCK. I'm sobbing, I hate this

Okay, brainwashing. Fuck. Is... is that what happened to Morgana? Is that what Morgause did to her and so she did the same to Gwen? Fuck.

[bladekindeyewear]

Boots Reads Homestuck Epilogue(s) Part 10 - Candy Part 1 again

I was told that finishing the epilogue MAY make me feel better by some with opinions, with some vague hints that the ridiculous start of Candy may have underlying reasons, so now that I’m awake again (though my stomach is roiling a bit again) I’m gonna take another crack at it.

Alright, so I was also hinted that this Candy part ends with a different cliffhanger, so maybe those two will cancel out?  That’s my hope anyway.

Reading page 1 again since I didn’t finish the very tail end of it... alright, so WHY IS ROXY CRYING again????  Was she just PRETENDING that she didn’t know it might turn out bad for John if he went at the end of the last one?  Was there some weird mind-rewriting going on?  Is the crying a symptom of this whole thing potentially being an our!Callie fanfic and she knows what’s being dodged??  Don’t know.

Alright, let’s have him save Gamzee and... is Vriska going to get saved in this version?  Or is that descent into the black hole without seeing what happens her well-deserved comeuppance while only the ghost version of Vriska truly figured out how to be happy?

==>

Dirk acknowledges him when he zaps back, but it’s YOUNG Dirk so hopefully there isn’t any stupid Meat stuff going on.

...Yeah, Gamzee immediately being repentant is weird as shit.  Maybe he Chucklevoodoo’d Callie into escaping him into this whole candied mess so he could start shit, I dunno.  That or this isn’t really Gamzee or someone’s manipulating him or etc etc etc.  The hint I got earlier was that if I thought Calliope wanting to bring Gamzee back and everyone just rolling with it was a little out of character, there are “reasons”, so I’m just going through all of this under the assumption that some emotion-manipulating weirdness is going on regardless.

Oh shit, Gamzee’s going to start recounting his character reasons for doing bad stuff in a surface-hope of justification and understanding.  All the characters immediately recognize how painfully groanworthy this is going to be.

GAMZEE: AnD sUcH iS wHy I’m GrAbBiNg HoLd Of My RePeNtAnCe As FiRm AnD sErIoUs As I wOuLd A wHoRe’S tItTy!

Yeah, that really encapsulates how “serious” all of this is.  And of course, John’s not having any of it.

Yeah, Terezi wouldn’t have any of it either, remotely.

Something feels different, but he can’t put his finger on it.

Hm.  The aforementioned manipulation-weirdness?

==>

Okay, so it’s kind of Dirk who notices something different and is cancelling his stupid villain plans, got it.

Volatility of causality, huh?

(I’m going to be going through these parts a little faster than the Meat section, unsurprisingly.)

==>

Okay, Rose and Kanaya, are we gonna cure her substance abuse or--

With all the distance between them lately,

God damnit, have Dirk’s manipulations extended that far OFFSCREEN or is this legitimate character distancing???? Because either is BAD.  >:(

Right, now that the plot and “relevance” has been sidelined over to a different timeline, Rose can now breathe easy free of her condition.  And whichever parts of her condition were, perhaps, IMPOSED on her.  Fuck.

I’m going to try my fucking best to cling to this, hope I can carry on a memory after this is over that DOESN’T imagine Rose trapped in a fucking existential dying villain coma with a hard fucking cutoff that promises nothing is ever coming to resolve it ever.  (Or Jade in a somewhat-similar sidelined situation, or Jane doomed to fuck herself over and everyone else too, or...)

What’s slipping away instead is the feeling that any of it mattered at all. Was she insane to be so consumed by such lofty concerns, and is she only beginning to experience clarity today, for the first time in ages?

Yeah, you’re no longer in a timeline of Light and relevance.  And that’s not so bad, which is something you never expected to be true given your derision of the concept.  Void is pretty goddamn alright.

--Oh right, the illness and substance abuse probably caused plenty of distance between them.

KANAYA: There Was A Feeling I Couldnt Shake That Something Terrible Was Going To Happen To Us KANAYA: Something That Neither Of Us Could Stop KANAYA: A Powerful Outside Force That Would Take You Away From Me KANAYA: And I Couldnt Stop Myself From Thinking That Maybe KANAYA: Maybe That It Would Be For The Best ROSE: Kanaya... KANAYA: I Can Now See That This Is Completely Ridiculous

For some reason, this doesn’t settle my stomach much?  It’s clear Andrew wove this in here so that if you read Meat first, you’d be able to acknowledge readily how this diverged in a way the characters kind of recognize, and... I’m not sure what I’m even saying.  It’s like there’s hope that this is TRYING to take the bad taste out of my mouth, but I don’t believe it overly much.

ROSE: What a relief, considering that we are both going to be young and magically fit literally forever.

Wait, so they DID find a way to extend their non-ascended friends’ lifespans to practical immortality?  Jane’s Life powers?  Something else?

==>

yay jade.  more extended dave metaphors.  calm down stomach.

JADE: i never thought id be thinking of you as my weird nerd friend by the time we were in our twenties

Heheheh.

DAVE: yeah well i never thought youd be like the premiere woo girl on the planet

Had to look up what a “woo girl” was.

Yes Jade go flirt them to death

What she’s planning isn’t a seduction. It’s a public service.

Pff

(And yeah, she’s being pushy but at least she doesn’t go DIRK FAR about it.)

DAVE: its incredible hes driven at least ten people off the site by creating thinly veiled parody accounts of their usernames

Oh my gosh, Karkat’s good enough to ANDREW HUSSIE them?!???  :D

That’s incredible.

Karkat knows damned well what a husband is. He’s been force-fed enough bad movies from Dave to pick up any human euphemism you could name. He still plays dumb sometimes, for comedic effect, to irritate his friends, or simply to avoid a topic of conversation altogether.

Yeah, it was always pretty clear that about HALF of the trolls pretended not to understand something human that they knew about just for comedic effect and they knew it.  :)

It would be pretty easy to mistake his reaction for arousal, so it’s understandable that Jade is extremely surprised when Karkat snaps his jaw shut and chomps down on her hand.

PFFFFHahahahah :D

And yep, Jane cancelled her run at Dirk’s direction.

DAVE: lets all just thank whichever christ was responsible for making whatever decision resulted in her deciding not to do that

*nod nod*

JADE: well i hope she gets a better hobby JADE: there are a lot of less ominous things she could do with her time KARKAT: WHAT, LIKE FUCKING HER WAY THROUGH HALF THE POPULATION OF EARTH C?

Jade pinches his ear and twists hard, smiling pleasantly.

JADE: get fucked karkat

Yeah, this is about the level of violence/threat I’d expect from Jade when anyone slut-shames her for perfectly acceptable behavior.

==>

There is almost no crime on Earth C, and so almost no one locks their door.

Huh.  I guess post-scarcity might do that.

Alright, we get to see Jane being less of a fuckass.

Dirk was the one person on Earth C who took the state of the locksmith industry with the seriousness it deserved.

Pffff

JAKE: Thats my theory at least. Maybe its tommyrot but i have faith that dirk will be back. After all where is he going to go?

Good question that wasn’t answered in Meat, so of course Jake says it here obliviously.

JAKE: I must admit i am rather half rats at the moment. JANE: You’re what? JAKE: Haha sorry that was a pretty obtuse way of putting it wasnt it. JAKE: What i mean to say is that ive been powdering my hair quite a bit today.

Andrew is SO good at making Jake sound completely incomprehensible.

...Ouch, Jane, don’t drink so hard! D:

The “morbs”??

JAKE: Dirk has that manner about him does he not? JAKE: A way about him that makes you feel like whatever you do as long as it does not involve him it doesnt count for dick.

Yeah, fuck Dirk.

Hm... is the absence of relevance affecting them, or some other manipulation? It’s not just the LACK of Dirk’s manipulation.

JAKE: Except of course for that time when you were under mind control and had me trussed up in your lair as you pontificated villainously about using me as a breeding stud to create a blood lineage for your incumbent corporate space empire.

A fate Dirk seems to agree with, judging by Meat.  Let’s sidestep that fucking entirely, thank you.

...yeah, I didn’t expect Jake’s response to be any less oblivious than exactly that.

==>

So why DID Callie bring Gamzee back, anyway?  Is there some secret use for him in mind?  Was she manipulated into it?  Maybe BY Gamzee?  Hm.

...alright, priestly with followings.  That ain’t good.  Is he aiming for Clown President MK2?

Everything Callie and Roxy have done and said in this Candy section so far seems creepily contrived, possibly by design.

...okay did they have some kind of weird agreement? Like, “okay John is gonna make his choice, and if he chooses to stay i try dating him instead of you, Callie”???  That’s... no that can’t be it.  Roxy’s NEVER acted THIS oblivious before.  What’s she playing at?

GAMZEE: mY fUcKiN *gUy*. :o) JOHN: ... GAMZEE: My DuDe AnD mY nInJa AlIkE. GAMZEE: mY *hOrN* dOoOoG. JOHN: ... GAMZEE: mY hOrN tO tHa MoThErFuCkIn DoG. ;o) JOHN: waiter! help!

I’m imagining Gamzee now as a sweaty and homeless, unkempt Guy Fieri.

Yeah, this doesn’t look like it’ll be fun.

==>

...Swifer Eggmop.  ¬_¬”

There’s a third member of their social group who definitely hasn’t arrived at the conclusion that his power and influence should be meted out responsibly either. Neither of them speak his name, however. For some reason, it feels like a shadow passing over the sun. A brief spike of pain flickers through Rose’s head, a bolt that strikes between her eyes and splinters out. There is color and light behind it. A vision that tears through the material reality in front of her and gives her a brief glimpse into a parallel reality where things are very different.

Yeah, fuck Dirk.

...Pff. Yeah, Rose WOULD mimic the record-scratch gesture.

Don’t invoke “never seeing Vriska again” like that, you’re really tempting fate.

Heh, Rose is finding some Light in the darkness, wanting to do something that’s meaningful on an expressive level with this Vriskgrub business.

Hm... why is my stomach a little less uneasy?

I sure hope it stays that way.

==>

KARKAT: OH MY GOD, ARE THE MECHANICAL GLUTES ON THAT BILLBOARD ACTUALLY PADDED WITH PLUSH TO MAKE THEM MORE LIFELIKE?

Heck Yes

...Yes, touch the butt, Karkat.

Jade, pouting a bit, glides in between them and uses her Space powers to teleport Dave’s phone out from the center of his traumatized palm and into the pocket of her sweater.

Hm!  So she still has teleportation abilities over a limited range even without her Green Sun boost, that’s nice.  :D

After all, where would these two pitiful beta boys be without her?

Oh my fucking god stop being Dirk, Jade.  And never use that narrative language again, even in your head.  Heck, even if Dirk’s the one WRITING this still, don’t even think CLOSE enough to think those words.

...yeah this sounds like an Active player class taking things slightly too far.

Thank you, Karkat, for drawing the consent-line in the sand.  Looks like Jade’s backing off a little.

--hold on, wait, Dave kissed him? He did, so why is-- let me read back up--

Dave doesn’t answer. She answers for him by leaning down and planting a dry, affectionate kiss on Karkat’s cheek.

Okay I misread this line earlier.  Jade kissed Karkat when neither of them were looking and is BLAMING Dave.  Hmm.

Alright, Dave ollies outie.  Karkat tumbles down some hillstairs.

Jade could probably catch him. Actually, she could easily do it, but it doesn’t seem like the kind of favor you should do in a fledgling kismesissitude.

Thaaaat’s a little presumptuous??

JADE: well i guess im eating grub spaghetti alone JADE: *again*!!!

:C

I’d be sadder if you didn’t bring it down hard upon yourself but

:C

==>

Yeah, John, better clear up this Callie business because it’s muddy as heck why Roxy would just drop everything to try things out with you.

Ah, we’re bringing up the gender identity thing on this side too, hm?

More serious talk, this is good, reading reading...

The glasses clink together clumsily, and water gets all over the complimentary breadsticks.

Oh no.  This had better not be Olive Garden.

ROXY: no one else has ever made me feel like this

--not Calliope???

What the heck is even going on.

Dave’s coming for some bro help it looks like.

==>

It’s hilarious how much Dave is freaking out about this, and how completely in-character it is.

JOHN: holy fucking shit. JOHN: there’s a gay snooze button? DAVE: yeah man theres a gay snooze button JOHN: wow.

I love these two’s conversations

......wait, Dave’s been holding off on kissing Karkat because of what he thinks JADE might think???? D:

JOHN: i almost managed to forget that she was trying to fuck you and karkat.

Pfffffffff  :D

Yep.  I love it being put so bluntly.

Reading on... yeah, for some reason I also always figured that the end result of a nice three-way relationship between those three people would be Jade and Dave essentially both just glomming onto Karkat more than each other?  Hm.

JOHN: i mean... it doesn’t sound... JOHN: *canon*?

...I hope you’re just talking about his coin flip explanation and not DaveKatJade.  >:(

John wonders when talking to Dirk has fixed anything for anyone.

Nod nod.

She grins up at John with shimmering, adoring eyes. They’re reflecting every star in the sky, all for him.

Seriously, what the hell.  Is Roxy hypnotized?  Putting on an act?  A voidy act??

I’m not doubting that Roxy COULD feel that way about John, I’m doubting the suddenness and the way Calliope is being deliberately ignored in the situation, which is so goddamn obvious that JOHN is uncomfortable about it.  There’s something seriously strange going on.

It itches at the back of his head, the idea that he might have just fucked up Dave’s entire life.

D:

Alright next post after a bit of breakfast.