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milkybonya · 4 years

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hello smiling anon here :) can i request nct 127 as boyfriends? ur astro as boyfriends post was so cute :)

Anonnie im sorry i made you wait so long TT this is the busiest week of the year so far and i had to stay focused to prepare for it, but i hope you enjoy~

NCT 127 as boyfriends ♡

link to Astro version

Warnings: food mentions

what i listened to while writing: To My Youth by BOL4

Taeil

sweet to the MAX

always singing around the house and serenading you

multiple movie nights with you in one week where you eat a whole bunch of junk food together and cuddle the entire time ;3;

becomes flustered very easily when you reach for his hand or hug him because he doesn't like skinship

but strangely with you, his heart skips a beat??

helps you when you're stressed by enveloping you in a hug and not letting go until you feel better

not overly clingy but not distant either - he's the perfect bf !!

knows when to give you space and when he needs to invade your space and give you lots of kisses >:)

not big on fancy dates, just wants to bask in your presence

wherever he is, as long as you're there, he's happy

i don't know why but i imagine his hand getting clammy when you hold it because he's so nervous,, then he gets all shy and embarrassed about it :")

Johnny

always taking photos of you

literally has a folder in his phone named '[y/n]'

so whipped for you omg he literally giggles any time you lock eyes

so EMBARRASSING cause of all the bad jokes he cracks and how tough he tries to act

"[y/n] do you wanna feel my arm muscles?"

waking up next to him each morning would involve you thinking he’s asleep and staring at him until he pulls you closer into his chest and presses his lips to your forehead ;3;

takes you on really creative dates like going to markets, going for drives, walks through unknown paths

if y’all are not seeing each other in person, he’ll constantly be texting or calling you

always sends you photos of things that remind him of you

the type to pretend he’ll give you your coat, then he doesn’t, but then he does because he loves you :”)

quite clingy in the sense that he always wants to be near you, holding your hand, hugging you, kissing you, whatever it may be

Taeyong

such a sweet and loving bf :”)

the type to buy you flowers and be that classy, romantic boyfriend

he’ll leave handwritten notes around the house and will send you good morning texts if you guys are apart from one another

the two of you are definitely the cool couple

but you’re also the couple who laughs hard about the most random things

like Taeil, knows when to give you space and when he should be there for you

will respect your sense of independence and root for you to succeed in your own things!

but also gets clingy sometimes and just wants a few hugs and kisses :”)

acts cute and pouts in front of you a lot

but only in front of you, never in public or in front of anyone else

listens carefully whenever you’re sad and lets you rest your head on his shoulder, cry all over him - he lets you do whatever you need to do to be happy again, and he’ll try his best to cheer you up too :D

Yuta

loves reading with you, it’s one of his favourite things to do :”)

sometimes just ends up staring at you which leads to him pulling you towards him which leads to cuddling while reading and for him to kiss the top of your head an infinite amount of times

omg he will let you braid his hair or play with it or do all kinds of things to it

painting each other’s nails !! and searching for unique accessories in stores!

he’ll just buy an accessory and give it to you like “i just know this will look good on you, please try it on!”

i feel like he’ll be very honest with you about everything

so you both have nights when you talk for hours about your thoughts

and in the morning forget all about it by watching something while in bed hehe

will like exercising with you from time to time so you both stay healthy!

always thinking about you and your health, both mental and physical

you might be able to convince him to get a couple outfit :o

Doyoung

Like Johnny, likes taking photos of you but does it a bit more shyly

puts on a cool front all the time but he’s quite shy ;-;

loves to bake with you and actually takes it quite seriously

he’ll chase you around if you smudge batter on his face >:)

makes home dates fancy by lighting so many scented candles that the smell actually becomes unbearable

when you go on walks together, he’ll hide behind you every time he sees a dog, and you always have to apologize to the dog owners on his behalf because he’s scared :”D

likes to lie on top of you when you cuddle, with his weight on his legs which are on either side of you so he’s not crushing you, just so he can trace the shape of your face with his fingertips

if you cry, he cries and if you laugh, he’ll laugh - i feel like that’s how he’ll comfort you, by empathizing :”)

likes to go on car rides with you where the two of you are just singing songs

always makes sure you’re eating your meals and staying hydrated - brings you food if you’re busy or forget

gets you really thoughtful gifts for special days but also throws a few meme gifts in there

Jaehyun

that bf who invites you to watch him play basketball just so he can take off his shirt in the middle of the game and watch as your face turns red

i feel like he’ll tease you in that ^ way a lot - he’s always trying to fluster you

he likes peaches so imagine going peach picking with him !! you’ll take such cute photos together and if he’s taller than you, he’ll pick all the peaches that you can’t ;3;

always trying to cheer you up whenever you’re sad - why can i picture him doing aegyo TT

this one time it rained when you were on a late night walk with him and he took off his jean jacket, held it above your heads as you ran home, but you ended up wet anyway :”)

super comforting whenever you’re sick or don’t feel good

constantly complimenting you and shows you lots of physical affection

always hugs you when he sleeps because if you’re not there, he’d just be hugging the blanket instead

not incredibly sentimental but always tries his best to show his love for you

tried to make breakfast in bed for you and dropped a whole bunch of cutlery on the floor :D

went through your phone and saved his name as ‘peach’ in it

Winwin

(this is from WayV as boyfriends, that’s why it looks a little different <3)

SOFT ANGEL

SOFT SOFT SOFT

did i mention he’s soft?

always worried about you

genuinely cares about your feelings

a lot of “are you okay?” and “you’re not mad at me, right?”

if you’re ever in a bad mood, he’ll run to the store real quick and grab your favourite food for you

A LOT OF CUDDLES AND LAZY MORNINGS

he doesn’t like skinship but loves to hold you :’)

too shy to show affection in public tho

will hold your hand at the most

even if he does that, he’ll hold your hand in your pocket because he’s so shy

pls protecc him at all costs

is willing to do anything for you

sometimes you have to ask him how he genuinely feels about something

because he can’t say no :(

please make sure you tell him you love him regularly, or he’ll be sad :(

a lot of stay-at-home dates like watching movies

watchiNG ANIME (if you like it, of course)

“let’s just do whatever you want”

wiLL CRUSH YOU IN MOBILE GAMES

“i beat you! now give me a kiss >:)”

Jungwoo

if you also like to eat, y’all will have the most epic food dates omg

literally travelling to countries just to try the food there - that’s what it will be like

most of your dates involve food, but also a lot of walking dates so you can burn it off :”)

yet also many movie nights on the days where you don’t want to walk

he’ll learn your speaking habits and will imitate you whenever you get annoyed or angry

likes to play soccer with you, even if you’re bad at it (so he can tease you), but if you’re good then he’ll enjoy trying to beat you

he’s the one who roasts you the most yet also cares for you the most

likes to kiss your neck because he can smell your natural scent, but if you hate it then he’ll do it to tease you or he’ll stop if you seriously tell him to

imitates kdrama male actors and actually makes your heart flutter by doing those things

and when you see the actors kissing in a drama,,,, you already know what he’s about to do

when you’re upset, he’ll hug you tightly and stay with you until you feel better

Mark

y’all have a shared playlist that you always add songs to so you can listen to it during car rides or when cuddling

he keeps everything and anything you give him, whether it be a candy wrapper, flowers, a belt, shoes, anything

prepares really sweet gifts for you - a lot of songs or meaningful things

claims that you’re his muse and sometimes just stares at you for 5 minutes whenever you drop by his studio

“you’re my sun, i’m photosynthesizing so just stay right there”

he’s shy and gets flustered easily when you kiss or hug him, even when you just hold his hand

you have a tradition with him each fall where you go to a park, gather all the leaves to make a pile so you can dive into it

usually ends with you falling on top of him and the two of you just laying there for a long time

voice calls that last for more than 8 hours will become a thing when you date him :”)

always jokes about things related to marriage like ‘wow imagine if we had our wedding here’ and laughs awkwardly but he’d actually love to marry you

takes you on trips that he claims are for him to get inspiration for music writing but he really just wants to spend time with you

Haechan

you already know what you’ve signed up for, right? chaos, absolute chaos - but in the best way

super clingy, always holding onto your arm or hand

whines when you don’t give him hugs or attention

bought a big plushie that reminded him of you so he can hug it when you’re not there and he misses you

he’s such a baby omg he’ll love being babied by you

makes hand crafted, diy gifts that clearly have his entire heart and soul in them

likes singing karaoke songs with you because if too you’re shy to sing alone, at least when he sings with you, he can hear a bit of your voice

cannot live if you’re sad or upset - he’ll do anything to help you feel better

cuddling is his favourite thing on this planet and he’ll wrap his legs around you so the two of you become an entangled mess, yet somehow are still comfortable

texts you random things like ‘i just saw a dog’ but also says stuff like that out loud to you

acts strong and cool sometimes like when you’re watching horror movies but fails miserably :(

ah, have you made it to the bottom? thank you for reading <3 were you by any chance looking for a sign? because this is it, this is your sign. i wish you luck with whatever it is that you must or must not do ;3;

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itsjusta · 3 years

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May 25, 2021

happy heartbreak anniversary!!!! its been a year since our break upppp!!!!

i thought today was gonna feel like a very fulfilling day doe but aish i just feel like normal man hhaha maybe becos i’ve been there have been a lot of times when i cry jd doe kanang maka think ko about those days where it was so hard gyd 🥺 but now that im writing this and reflecting on everything issa cry napd ko uiiieee im both happy and sad with where i am now one year after the break up doe. im happy cos i made it this far and that i think i’ve been through the worst na but also sad becos aishhh ion know doe why i’m still not healed pa hahha the past year i’ve doubted myself a lot and my value but i never blamed u for anything doe and i never wanted u to be hurt like how im hurting. u know daaat doeee that i never wished na u would feel the same as im feeling now cos i always wished u happiness doeee i hope u know that i’m being honest gyd 🥺🥺 i never hated you for anything doe and i’m also trying not to blame myself gyd for where i am now but i think its becos of me man gyd because im the one man making decisions HAHAHAHHA but i dont think na about that i’m just living in the present doeee and i’m just continue hoping for good days gyddd heheh and im happy and contented man pd with where i am now doeee its a better place than last year gyd!!!!! 🥺🥺🥺 time now flies faster compared last year doe like sauna murag ang isa ka oras kay isa ka adlaw doeee and kada adlaw gyd muhilak ug grabeeee now still cry but sometimes nalang 😜 hehe

im also trying not to overthink things doeee cos ion know i feel like changes are gonna come doe and my gut feelings are always right?!?! aish i just feel weird doe but dont wanna dwell on dat cos it will just make me scared and make me cry aishhh and maybe im just an overthinking idiot 🤦🏻‍♀️

i saw a tiktok doeee nga like happy sya cos nakakita na syag person nga gi love syag tarong and aish i thought na dayon na what if inana imo na feel!!! and ka cry ko!!! like what if i didnt treat u right gyd btaw OMG IM SUCH A BAD GF 😭 i also thought that i made u suffer a lot before doeee like silently hahah i know i did u just didnt tell me doeee and das why i want gyd to become better doe like aish dont want to make my future bf tired doeee hehe and also for me so i dont undergo na heartbreaks uie hahahah

at night after dinner nag do ko task for ate sweet doeeee heheh issa mga 1 hr and 30 mins ko work and 250 lang iya pay ani huuuh but das fine haha i have to do one task pa toooom!! and khalid wala online2 naa pa sya kulang 500 ana sya karon niya i pay 😤😤

i rested na at 9pm doeee ehheh and watched rko drama gitiwas to nako ako gina watch and naaaweee happy endinggg doeee issa makahappy sa heart 🥺 and i also chika to u about my law school plans and gaka excite ko doeee wth whenever i talk about my future i get excited gydddd issa my future gyd baya nag serve as anchor nako doeee aishhh esp before when so kapoy na ang all i pushed thru gyd becos i want to build pa a future for myself hehehe a good one!!! and now my mind is always changing next year lahi nsad ni HAHHAHAHA but das fine doeee its my future and i know people will support me hehehe and i still have a year to decide gyd ambak2 sako now ehehhe after kdrama issa tiktoook time and its now 1 am 👁👄👁

good niiighttt doeee thank u for everythiiing gydddd 🥺 thank u also for being there da past yeaaaarrr!!!!! im sowi if im a burden to u doeee huhu enjoy ur day off amping always pls!!

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l0stmayneverbefound · 2 years

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what just happened

with long term relationships, its difficult to regain the sparks sometimes and watching other people be in their honeymoon stage makes me resentful. i cant help but feel resentment because im wondering can the honeymoon phase stay forever if its with the right person or are they always bound to fade away...?

sometimes i wonder if its even going to work... are we so different? i just feel like you cant satisfy my emotional needs. i need someone to show me they love me always, physically verbally emotionally. to compliment me and make me feel loved and cared for and beautiful. i dont want to have to remind someone to do that or beg someone to do that for me. it would come naturally to them if thats who they are. and i think i do need someone who gives me that. especially on my period. normally, im pretty stable and secure in myself that i dont need that. but i hear other peoples love stories and little things their SO does for them and it makes me sad. im stable and secure in myself but i still want those things from a boyfriend. and i dont wanna ask too much... i dont wanna be upset w him every time he cant give me that, bc its not him, it just means we are not compatible. that kills me inside. truly, honestly breaks my heart and makes me bawl. but i dont want to be unhappy forever and i dont want him to be either, esp bc i know resentment will grow from both of us. i dont know what to do. i know people would say (and tbh i would tell my friend this if she asked me) to just communicate. to just talk about it. how can you be together with someone you cant even communicate with? those are the exact words i would say to somebody if they said this to me. i dont know. i guess im scared we actually arent compatible. because what happens then? what about our already planned future? theres a lot at stake and i guess i could do it but will i be happy? im not sure im not sure im not sure.

ill probably feel better about this tomorrow and have a clearer head and be less emotional. its still so scary to feel this way. i feel like my world is in shambles. i dont even compare my relationship to other peoples normally but seeing others being happy and in love and in the honeymoon phase and getting to know one another and always doing cool/cute/fun things is sending me into a depression spiral!!!! i cant do anything right now bc i have to saveeee up. we dont do anything fun or cool or exciting. i honestly think the spark is gone. and on top of that i always have to worry about his answer. i dont know why, was it always like this? what did he/i do to make me feel so nervous about his answer? the unpredictability. the blindsiding?

i feel better and a little more normal but im not sure what i want still. i need to see if things get better. i think we both need therapy. im scared my therapist will tell me to leave him/vice versa. i guess if its for the best long term......... but its still a hard pill to swallow. but realistically, we may both be happier long term with someone who matches our needs more. its just hard. its just so hard. i always thought we would end up together, even now... i cant wrap my head around if we actually were to break up... but i dont want to feel like this forever. i dont want to beg him for the stuff i need. i dont want to coach someone to meet my needs better. i need someone who does this stuff naturally bc thats who they are...

having a bf is not supposed to make you feel so alone. i should be able to share stuff with him, not hide it and be worried of wha the will say. i shouldnt be scared to discuss certain things with him. i think we are both still not very honest and open with each other. i dont know whats going to happen.

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maybe-its-5sos · 7 years

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Hey I really love your writing and I was hoping if you could tell me what you're working on atm?

Well, I have 24 requests at the moment, and I think I can only do headcanons this weekend, since I’m not home and the internet is of questionable quality.

this is what I have atm:

I was wondering if I could request an imagine where batmom has a twin sister and nobody knew so the boys are out one day and they see batmom’s twin sister with her bf or husband and they’re like “wtf mom you’re cheating!??!” so they bring the said sister to the Manor and try and find Bruce but then they see batmom in the living room watching TV and probs cuddling Titus and they’re just super confused, “wtf we have two moms?!

Can u pretty please do a part two for ‘can’t live without you’ it was soo good, btw love your writing

Can you do an older Damian one where the reader works at a pet shop? When Damian finds out he visits them every day until it gets to the point where their coworkers believe he actually works there and start an elaborate plan to get the two together? Bonus if the other batboy help the plan.

Can you please write an imagine where the batboys go back in time where batmom and bruce were teens and unexpectedly break up and the kids try to bring them back together?

I’m so happy requests are open again! Could you please do an imagine where the reader and jason are dating but he gets scared something is going to happen with the reader so he breaks up with her but When the batfamily find out they’re angry bc they know how much he loves her so he tries to win her back??

Could you do a part 2 to Not A Sound where the batboys have to watch reader again and they’re determined to figure out which of them caused her to coo the last time.

Jason or dick reacting to their S/O being a pop star and having to leave for tour. Please and thank you!!

Maybe you could do Part 3 of Fresh on the scene??? I really love it and I wanna see how it ends!!! (I wanted to make a longer series out of this but people didn’t seem too interested)

Can you please make a headcanon about the reader being mixed? And I love your blog ❤❤ (About to come out probably)

Could you do a headcannon where Damian realizes he has a crush on the reader? Like they’re good friends and he’s like, “oh shit.” (It’s fine if you say no lol, I’m just obsessed with FTL Damian)

How about where Reader’s eyes will sometimes get watery for no reason, you know the feeling eyes stinging slight and you blink which causes your eyes to get watery like you’ll cry, but for Reader, this causes a tear or two to slip a lot of the times when this happens and Damian catches them when some tears slip now they have to explain to Damian that they aren’t sad and this happens on a regular basis.

Can you make an imagine where the reader was part of the League of Assassins and her and Dami were best friends?Than they meet after 4 years and looot of fluff please?

Hello, could you write a headcanon about their S/O being mixed? (This repeats)

Could you do headcanons about how the batboys would deal with a rebellious teenage daughter

Can u pretty please do headcanons for the batboys+bruce with an artistic s/o, or maybe an imagine where one of the batboys try to flirt with their s/o’s while their painting and shes like im busyy but eventually plays along and just as they are about to kiss she smears paint on their face and bOLTS laughing her booty off while the boy runs after her for a kiss covered in paint, maybe they can catch her and it gets fluffy and reader is covered in paint and kiss marks?

PART 4 OF MOM DOESNT WANNA SEE YOU WHERE THEY GO ON A DATE AND KISS AND MAYBE THE KIDS STALKING THEM CASUALLY AND SEE AND GET EXCITED, BLOW THEIR COVER BUT BATMOM IS ACTUALLY PRETTY HAPPY;; OR WHERE THE GIRL WHO HE CHEATED ON BATMOM WITH FLIRTS WITH BRUCE BUT HE LIKE SHUTS HER ASS DOWN SO FAST BC HE LOVES BATMOM (I didn’t expect this to take off?!?)

Headcanon of dating the outlaws and how they would be if another person would be flirting with them and some smut possibly??

could you write An imagine where Jason’s S/O is hurt Badly and he gets worried. Thank you, And I love you Blog by the way.

Can you write an imagine about being in a poly relationship with Jason and Roy??

May I please request a scenario where dick and Jason start to fall for batgirl!reader who has been at the job longer than they have and who helped train them.

Can you do a headcanon with the boys + Bruce where their s/o is/was a spy?

After reading your You Live On, I was drowning in my own pool of tears but IMAGINE Damian was with his fiancee, and wanted to propose to her AND THEN someone shot her, right after he proposed!! The aftermath is up to you, though….

could you make a headcanon of Damian falling in love with someone older than him

So could you maybe do a hubby!Dami hc of him just surprising his s/o (with gifts) because he loves them?

I wanted to get my inbox empty by next week but my life really got in the way and I do apologize for the slow content this week, it just hasn’t been a great week to be honest, I hope thats okay!

#Anonymous #let me know what youre most excited for?#would be cool to know #also does anyone actually read the tags?

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captainalwayslazycollectort-blog · 6 years

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I reported about an accident to my insurance. Waiting for the police report, weeks came by. Now, I have the police report but my insurance is not responding my calls, but the insurance of the responsible party is. Who is in charge of fixing my car?""

Car insurance questions?

okay im 19 livin in MICHIGAN. My driving record sucks, (2) accidents i got rear ended, (3) speeding tickets a total of 7 points license is restricted till jan, 2012. I want a car but its around 600-900$ a MONTH to insure me, 99 dodge neon to a 2010 mustang gt all the same price a month depends what insurance company. i cant be on my parents insurance because they excluded off their policy. I allso live in a apartment, so is it possible to buy a insurance policy in my moms name with her correct sos number and drivers license number and lie and say she lives with me in my appartment and put me as a secondary driver. but the car ill be fiancing so i need full coverage and the car is in my name . My questions are (A) my mom uses lifelock will she find out that i opened a policy in her name. (B) will the insurance company find out about that my mom doesnt live their or would they find out at all. AND MY MOM LIVES AT A ANOTHER ADDRESS. (C) is it legal to own and fiance a car thatS in my name but insurance is not ill be listed as a seconday driver under my mom . (d) my mom WOULD NOT KNOW IM DOING THIS. I KNOW THATS FRAUD BUT U GOT TO DO WHAT U GOTTA DO how would anyone know what im doing and find out about it""

How much would I pay for car insurance?

I am a male, 24 years old (turn 25 in july), student.... what is the cheapest car insurance you think I can get?""

Nissan Skyline R34 Insurance Question (WA)?

Hello guys, I had two questions about insuring a skyline R34 Turbo... First off, How much (On average) would this cost to insure for someone on their P plates. Second off, Do you know any good insurance companies to go through? WA Is for Western Australia, not Washington. Thanks in advance.""

Insurance on 2006 Ford Mustang and 2004 A4?

Hey, I'm a 16 year old student (turning 17 this year). I'll be getting my G2 in March of 2014, and I'm having a hard time deciding which car to save up for. It was between a 2004 Audi A4 or 2006 Mustang the whole way through. Which car would you recommend for a student? I'm having trouble finding an A4 for under $8,000 with decent kilometers. I was wondering how high the insurance would be for me on both cars, also I did not take driving school. I've also heard that if I write my mother's name as the primary driver, and my name as the secondary driver its cheaper.""

What does 10-20-10 mean on auto. ins.?

Illegal Immigrants and Helth insurance?

Do Health insurances check social security numbers to see if they are real or fake?

Does it cost more to insure an Automatic than a Manual?

I have a friend who recently passed her test. Stupidly she learnt in an automatic so she can only drive autos now. So the question is, are automatics more expensive to insure or is there not much difference? This is UK insurance by the way. I dont want to know about American car insurance as the prices might be different. Cheeers!""

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How high will my insurance be?

im 17 and want a 77 camaro, will insurance be high, can i have an estimate?""

Insurance for 1987 jeep wrangler?

Just wondering how much you pay for insurance if you have something like an 87' wrangler. Don't give me the just go to this site and get a quote. , I'd just like some numbers please ;)""

""Why do i pay $400 a month for car insurance, is it cause its my first car?""

Why do i pay $400 a month for car insurance, is it cause its my first car?""

Will my insurance go up when i get my own car?

i'm on my grandpa's insurance which makes my insurance 27 dollars a month but i do not have my own car. when i get my own car will the insurance go up and if so, how much will it go up?""

Cars with cheap insurance?

I am 17 and hold a full UK provisional license. I am having driving lessons. I'm just wondering of any cars with cheap insurance for when I pass my test as I'll be getting a car for my birthday in October. I am a girl so no boy racing cars

""Auto Insurance question!!1st car, Mitsubishi eclipse?""

im getting a mitsubishi eclipse for my 1st car but im going to be payin for half of the insurance on it and i want to know if it'll be considered a sports car under the insurance.it'll be between a 1995-1999 and one of three models(RS,GS,GS-T).im pretty sure the gs-t is a sports car but what about the other two? the insurance will already be high enough being a teenager and a male so i just want to make sure if any one of those would not be considered a sports car under car insurance.thanks for the help.and plz no smartasses talking about oh no another teen driving they really need to get that law change blah blah.just people that will help.o yea im in texas if that would make any difference""

""How to save more money as a teen, for a car and motorcycle?""

I'm about to turn 16, and would like to save up for a reliable, cheap (2k-4.5k), good-looking, car. It has to be American, or anything other than Honda, Subaru, Toyota, Lexus, Hyundai, etc. cause dad works for GM. I am paying for the car on my own, most likely, but maybe I can convince parents to pay 1k or so. Money is tight right now in my family. Dad got demoted last year during GM's bankruptcy, and may get a promotion in spring. My Mom is opening a restaurant this year, which is going to cost a lot. I got a job in November at a brand new Kroger grocery store, where I get minimum wage and cannot work over 16 hours per week because I'm only 15. I have saved a little over 1.2k in the bank. I also have invested $500 of my own money this year into stocks, which are up a little. This might sound dumb to some, but I have dreamed of buying a motorcycle. I want a Kawasaki Ninja 650R. AND YES, I KNOW INSURANCE COSTS MONEY, (FOR CAR AND MOTORCYCLE) I'M NOT AN IDIOT. I also need to plan on how to save for that. Any tips, help, and info would be great! Thanks so much.""

Where do I find the insurance group number on a Kaiser Permanente insurance card?

I am trying to waive my school's insurance because I want to use my own than paying for theirs. One question asked what is your 'Insurance group number'? I'm having difficulty finding the answer hopefully you can help me!

How can I see a cheap doctor w/ no insurance?

I am 23 years old and I don't have insurance. My husband got a huge pay cut and we had to cancel it. We just can't afford it at the moment. However, I am having some serious issues and I really want to see a doctor badly. I am having horrible pains in my hands and the rest of my body and pitting edema in my legs. I don't want to rack up a huge emergency bill, but I can't afford $200 for a doctors visit. Is there ANYWHERE I can go to see a doctor for really cheap??? It's to the point where I can hardly use my hands to even type this and I am scared. Thanks..""

If my camera is in my car and it is stolen will my auto insurance cover it?

Hi what is the best 600cc sports bike for an 18 year old bearing in mind the insurance?

I need some help with choosing my first 600cc bike at the moment i ride a skygo 125cc (yes chinese lol) but i turn 18 in a couple of weeks and am looking to buy my first big bike. iv had a look at the cbr 600 but not to keen on the shape to be honest and dont really like the shape of the r6 so im looking at the kawasaki ninja / suzuki gsxr 600 and 750. any ideas would really help insurance would play a big part for me to so i need the cheapest really and what price would i be looking at ? if anyone has any other bikes to suggest i would apreciate that aswell ?

Do I need Mexican Car Insurance?

I'm driving from Toronto to Monterrey via Columbia Bridge. I was wondering do I need Mexican car insurance, since I've seen a lot of sites adveritising it I'm curious. And is my Canadian drivers license valid in Mexico?""

How much would it be to insure a Datsun 280zx for a 16 year old in NC.?

I have a mustang but v6 want a little more, but worried it might be to much to do right now.""

Third party fire and theft? car insurance?

hi im currently searching for car insurance and ive been quoted 2800 for comprehensive insurance and when i gave third party fire and theft it came out to 1700 the car is a corsa 998c 2006 what is the difference between them both? thanks

What happen if I don't pay my car insurance?

I woul like to switch to another company that's going be cheaper, but I was wondering can I just not pay my old car insurance and start laying my new car insurance company, or do I need to finish with all the months that they gave me the insurance card for (it was for 6 months, 3 months left).""

What is the cheapest/best insurance for a 24yr old student/ stay at home mom?

My 3month old is covered under medicaid, but I need help finding an affordable insurance for myself. My fiance is covered by his work for free, but it would be $200 a check for him to add me and we cannot afford that at this time.""

What would happen if you show proof of full coverage to a lender then drop to liability?

Would the lender ever know that you dropped to liability? I am looking to finance a motorcycle and they require proof of insurance (full coverage), but the cost is insane.""

Why does car insurance quotes change every day?

Who understands health insurances? please help?

Okay so im 22 and have no health insurance, i just started working, and at this company they offer health insurance for full time positions only and well i am part time. I have had swollen tonsils since i was fourteen and been hospitalized twice because it was so bad that literally both tonsils were smashed together (i know gross) well i guess the question is, i want to try to get a health insurance that will minimize extremely the cost of getting these suckers removed. I dont understand all the deductible talk. So which insurance do you think is affordable and might be the one for me and my need? Please any advice and suggestions will be appreciated. Its a constant pain to go to the doctors and just come out with antibiotics which i guess take the pain but im not lying when i say that they are everyday permanently swollen. Please and Thank you.""

How do I get a homeowners insurance for an LLC?

Me and a partner have an LLC under which we own the home we live in. We are now looking for a homeowners insurance but are having some difficulties finding one for an LLC. How do we go about this?

Car insurance for rentals & college students?

I'm not trying to buy a car or get insurance. It's for a project for school. What's the range of prices of car insurance for students ages 18-22 and also what are the prices of renting the most basic car from a company, like an average amount. Thanks :)""

How can I get a California Health & Life Insurance License ?

I would like to find an online course or a study at home course if possible. Also, how long does the course take ? Thank you for your help""

How will this speeding ticket affect my insurance?

I got a speeding ticket. The insurance is under my fathers name. Will the insurance price go up because of MY speeding ticket?

Car insurance help. please help me?

I am buying a 2011 camaro 2lt. Now here is what I am thinking. If i put my car under my dad's insurance will my insurance also be lower if i am listen under my dad's insurance and as one of the people who drives the car instead of having the car under my insurance?

""According to the Hillary healthcare proposal, Individuals will be required to get and keep insurance in a

system where insurance is affordable and accesible. Is this a good idea? Why or why not?

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Which car insurance companies should I look into?

I'm looking for car insurance and was wondering which companies you would suggest I look into and get quotes from? Which company do you have and what do you like / not like about them? Thanks!!

What would insurance cost for a 16 year old male with 08 Honda Accord LX-S coupe/ 2dr?

Hi, I am a 16 year old male and I might be getting a 08 Honda Accord LX-S coupe. But I want to know how much it would be to insure the car. I know that it is not classified as a sports car. I'm not sure if I am getting it so I just want to know. I have a clean driving record with no accidents (i just got my license). Thanks!""

How does auto insurance works?

is the cost of auto insurance determined based on car model, year, or the the car price sold at?""

Car insurance question?

im planning on getting a dodge neon srt 4, im 20 i been driving since i was 16, i got my full license at 18. i have no accidents, tickets or anything(knock on wood). does anyone know how much it would be a month. im also planing on putting 4,000 down on it.""

I want a baby but don't have insurance?

My husband and I just got a new apartment and then got married courthouse style. We have both decided that we want a baby soon but right now we don't have insurance. Is there any cheap option that would cover the entire pregnancy?

Young Drivers Car Insurance!!!?

I've been shopping around for car insurance and for a car on my own I cant get it below 4,000 so to get this lower I was going to add my dad as the main driver and put me as an additional driver which got it down to 1,600, that was the plan until my mum told me it was illegal and called 'fronting' so that's out the window but then I was told when I buy my car to get my dad to buy it in his name, and then do the whole main driver and additional driver thing and it should be okay, is this true? If not can someone please give me some advice on how to get cheap car insurance, I'm going to be 18, it will be my first car and anything below a 1.4 engine size. Thanks""

Can a vehicle be registered and insured to different people?

i want to register the car in my name but ... the insurance will be cheaper in my boyfriends name... can we do that?

What is a semiannual premium for car insurance?

My quote was: Semiannual premium: $1251 Do I pay $1251 twice a year?

Whats some good cheap car insurance?

I have full coverage on my car and its costing me a butt load of money, i have state farm. Does anyone know of any good insurance companies?""

What are the best health care companies?

I'm in my early 20's, have no real health issues, and take no meds. I can not get affordable insurance through my job, and i just can't go without it anymore. I'm trying to find not just the most affordable plan, but the best company who wont try to screw me over at every turn (which i know is hard to find). I did some searching on my own, but the only list i could find of top rated companies were all state specific.""

Are there extensions of unemployment insurance in CA?

Does the claim automatically end once your remaining amount is gone, or can the claim be extended if you are still unemployed?""

How much should one spend on their first car?

Here is the problem. I am a photographer who photographs rural areas, but I can't stand not living in the city. I don't drive, cause I live in Chicago and I thought I hated driving. I think I just hated drivers ed. SO now I want to drive everywhere and work more often instead of waiting until I can find someone to drive me around. I am obviously going to be road tripping a lot, and this is my first car. I need something with great MPG. I live in Chicago, but my mom lives downstate, although I'd like to share it with her. I'm thinking either a used prius, mini cooper, or volkeswagon. I'm 19. What do you think would be the best choice, and what costs am I looking at for insurance, ect?""

Estimated car insurance cost for an 18 year old beginner driver?

I waited until I turned 18 until I went to get my drivers permit. I've had my permit since November 18 2009. I plan to stay on the permit until its expiration date. I'm not sure what car I plan to purchase after that, something affordable (nothing over the top) and that will last quite awhile. Now assuming all that, can any of you share with me what your car insurance payment is monthly, just an estimate of course. And throw in what type of car you have in so I can get a better idea. I'll be 19 at the time I finally get my license. My parents will not be adding me to their insurance, I have to pay for this on my own and I'd like to start putting some money away towards it so that I can make the payments with no problem later on. Are their any other things I can do to lower the cost of my car insurance as well?""

Car accident without insurance? Not at fault and no police report.?

This happened in California. I am an excluded driver on my dad's policy and do not have insurance myself. I was moving the car out of the garage to a parking spot in our complex. I came to a stop at a stop sign within the complex and was hit by another car who was reversing. The other driver admitted fault and I have an email where they essentially admit fault. Since I am an excluded driver and have no insurance, am I able to file a claim with their insurance company? If so, can their insurance deny the claim on the basis that I am an excluded driver and have no insurance?""

Car insurance under parents name?

So my parents are thinking about buying me a car. The only thing that is holding them back is the high insurance rate (I'm 21). Currently I am using my parents car for college and my current insurance is under my parents name. If my parents buy the car under their name, while having me on their insurance list, wouldn't the insurance rate be the same as my current one? Or at the least not as expensive as having my own insurance? Thanks.""

Insurance Nissan 350z?

I was wondering how much it is for insurance for a nissan 350z i'm 18 and haven't driven yet! Maybe somebody can help me

Insurance for seized cars..?

Okay my Boyf was driving his dads car to mine and thought he could use it under third party. He's only driving it cos his da is on holiday an he needs to drive it around. Anyway on the way over he got pulled over by the cops and they found out he wasn't insured. Therefore they seized his car. But after phoning up the insurance company he found out the car itself wasn't insured and his dads insurance expired a few months ago. Therefor the car is in the compound with no insurance and his current insurance company won't let him insure the car for anyone if it's been seized. But to get the car out, they need valid insurance to retrieve the car. So what can he do?""

Is there anyone that has Mercury Car Insurance? I am wondering if they are any good? Please help!?

Just curious on how they rate compared to other insurance companies.

How can i get cheap/free health insurance?

i live in chicago and wanted to go to the doctors but my dad informed me i have no health insurance (only him. he is legally blind on public aid) im 20 and in college what can i do

How much u pay for ur car insurance?

for small car. i am considering to get a daewoo matiz, coz its cheap running car. i have my hometown driving license, but thats only valid for 1 year, since i live here for the 2nd, i need to apply for uk license.""

Is there any way I can stay on my dad's insurance?

I recently graduated from college and I will begin working full time in about a week. In the fall, I will be a full-time graduate student. Since I will still be classified as a student, will I still be able to stay on my dad's insurance, or do I have to take the insurance package my employer offers me?""

""My homeowners insurance dropped me, what am I going to do?""

I had two claims in two years. They won't renew, my policy has expired and I can't find anyone that will cover me. Anyone sell insurance? I had a claim last summer when a limb fell through my camper. The insurance paid out $500. October 2007 I had a pipe burst in my foundation they had to pay out $22,000 that time. Right now I'm uninsured and nervous.""

How much would insurace cost monthly?

Im 16 and im gettin a 2003 cadillac CTS when i get my licences and i have a few questions. The car is $10,932 how much would the down payment be also how much monthly plus insurance?""

Crazy car insurance!!!??? advice please?

how on earth do young drivers these days manage to afford car insurance! my son is 19 and has his provisional licence. we were hoping to buy a car for him and the lowest quote we have for insurance is for 1,900!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!how on earth do young people manage! does anyone know of a way round this??? we just want him to be safe and legal! advice please? all answers greatly appreciated.""

If I take out home/car insurance?

But don't declare a conviction for violence from 20yrs ago (when asked do you have any convictions ) would the insurance be void or if I declare would the quote shoot up

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Auto insurance with international driving licence in CT?

I'm a graduate student, I want to buy a car but I don't have a U.S. license yet. Does any one know how much auto insurance would cost in Connecticut with an international licence? I have only heard from people that its more expensive.""

How much would it cost to get insurance on these mopeds?

Separately, how much would it cost (roughly)? I am doing this for an E-Consumerism project, but I may also want to actually buy the Duke Touring. Can anyone give me a rough estimate, in dollars, for the cost of each? Please leave some sort of source so I know you didn't just make it up.""

How do you go to the doctor if you do not have health insurance?

I am working but I do not have Health Insurance. How do you go and where do you go to the doctor if you do not have health insurance?

Is it expensive to insure a Prius?

I want to invest in buying a toyota prius but I heard that the insurance for these vehicles is expensive. I have Allstate insurance. Anyone who owns a prius, is the insurance ...show more""

How much would it cost for a citation with no insurance in Texas ?

Car insurance Age: 18?

How much is insurance on average for a 18 year old in the UK

Would insurance for a small SUV cost much more than insurance for a pickup truck?

I am thinking about buying a used 2WD CRV, or something of that nature. I am wondering if insurance is typically higher on that type of vehicle.""

Can my dad by a motorcycle and put it under his insurance for me to drive?

ok im conused about this whole thing i know for a 16 year old motorcycle insurance is crazy. So how would this work my dads been driving all his life(Harley-Davidson) and his insurance is cheap, now for me its gonna be alot of money so can he buy the bike and put it under his name then i just drive it so then it wont be so much $ on me? can this work or is that illegal for me to be driving someone elses bike? is there anyway like i stated above to make my insurance cheaper if this doesnt work?""

Can I have an estimate on my car insurance?

I am an 18 year old male, in the state of Pennsylvania who is gonna buy his own car. I have never been in a car accident or gotten a ticket in the past 2 years I've been behind the wheel (with my moms car). I also have State Farm insurance. Can someone let me know how much It would cost if I got a car insured under my moms insurance? Or maybe if it could be cheaper for me to get my own plan? Thank you!""

Car insurance question?

To cancel car insurance will be 480 plus 50 admin fee to cancel this now ive lost my job. ive had insurance for 2 months and know they are all doing this cancellation fee now but i only got a car for work purposes and now they've made me redundant how i am expected to pay the 530? what can i do is there any options because i simply cant afford that amount.

How much is Property Insurance? How much is Property Taxes?

Doing a paper for School Whats the average amount of property tax, for a statelike california? Say Los Angeles Is there an average on property insurance?""

""Toyota celica, my first car?""

so im getting a 2004 toyota celica gts as my first car and im wondering how much my insurance will go up just by having this kind of car and being a teenage male? also what color is best, i cant decide between silver or black. i love black cars but i think the celica looks great in silver too. are black cars really a pain to have to clean all the time and which would look best? and does anyone know if they are well built cars""

Motorcycle insurance for a 17 year old in california?

hey im 17 years old, and got the money together for my first bike. i went down to the dealership and was about to buy the bike when i found out insurance cost like 4k for full coverage. i want full coverage but dont wanna pay through the nose for it. i have not owned a bike before and i really want one, but im not sure if i can aford to. so my question is does anyone know what i should do to resolve my problem? preferably recomendations of good insurance comannys. thanks so much""

What is some good cheap car insurance for young adults between the ages of 18-24?

And I mean car insurance that you don't have to pay over 100 dollars for.

Car insurance liability question?

I was recently in a car accident. A vehicle was attempting to pass me on the right in a parking lot and hit my car. My insurance company said that I am not at fault. However, the other party's insurance said that I am at fault for the accident and will not pay to have my car repaired. I am positive that it is not my fault and it is easy to tell by looking at the damage to my vehicle. How can I go about having the insurance company pay for the damages to my car?""

How much does it cost on average to insure your license?

through any insurance company. :) I just want to know how much on average.

What is an affordable private health insurance plan in California for healthy 30 year old male?

Would like peace of mind incase of hospitalization.

How can I get insurance if I am not working?

they say its going to a law you have to have insurance well what if your not working did they come up for something for that

If I take my drivers licence test do I have to be put on my moms insurance?

My mom wont let me take the test to get my licence because she said that she cant afford to put me on her insurance. Is there anyway that I can get my licence with out insurance. I wont actually be driving her car, I just want to have my licence before I graduate in 2 months. If I wait until college, I wont be able to afford to take the test, nor will I have a car to use for the test. (I'm moving up state) Is there anyway that I can just get my licence?""

""With regards to auto insurance, what does having a deductable mean?""

For example, if I have a $500 deductable, what exactly does that mean when claiming from insurance?""

How much will it cost to put a learner driver on my car insurance?

Cost to insure brand new Range Rover Sport at 17 years old?

To start off, money is not a problem in this situation for me so dont tell start saying - Its unreliable - It'll be too expensive etc... Anyway! just wondering what a brand new range rover sport would cost to insure as a new driver with a full UK license as a named driver whilst im 17 years old? Thanks""

How much would it cost to insure a 07-08 Corvette.?

Considering also there is mileage around 5,000-26,000.. I am a 17 yr old girl and I was looking at the corvette and it really caught my eye! Sporty, fast, and just all over good look for me... What would be ( around / guesstimate ) the monthly payments & insurance because I heard it's cheaper for females to be insured than men.? Thanks!""

""Looking in to new Auto Insurance, with country insurnace and financial services?""

My boyfriend and I live togeather and have three vehicles, a Mazda Car, Dodge Truck and Yahama Street Bike we both have insurance policys with State Farm and we both are very happy all our insurance policys are seperate The car in my name with my agent the truck in his name with his agent and the st. bike also in his name and then i have a renters insurance policy just in my name. when his work started a 401K with Country Insurance they met with us and went over alot of services they offer and they did up a quote for our auto insurances and renters insurance which put the Mazda and Dodge togeather and both our names on the street bike and renters insurance it was much cheaper then what we pay state farm and we were both very happy with the agent and felt we'd have a good relationship with her... I'm just curiose if anyone has had or has Country insurance for the auto insurance and if they are happy with them?""

Should I be paying for car insurance? I don't have a car because I was in an accident.?

I was in an accident back in November and my car was totaled. The claim just closed a few days ago because they finally paid our medical bills and everything. Should we have to pay for car insurance right now? We still haven't purchased a vehicle because we didn't get much for our car. How do we handle this?

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https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/where-do-i-non-car-owner-insurance-michael-keller/"

0 notes

missdazednconfused · 6 years

Text

Digital journal

I'm too tired to be writing in my journal...well don't feel like writing. I've been so sad the pass few days because this guy that I love being with is...so confusing...sort of..at least from what he says...he tells me it's because he has to move away to be with his kids which I understand. I feel like he's pushing me away or trying to get rid of me...I don't know...I question myself...he's not the same anymore towards me...and it's been 3 months...in the beginning it really felt like this was it....but now it's like, I'm so scared.... That he's not feeling that way anymore....

He says he doesn't want to fall deeper and it being harder to leave to move to his kids...which it wouldn't... I mean it will be hard but it's like....can't we try...please...I'm so heartbroken thinking about it.. it's getting old though him dumping me for shitty things... I love who he is...even though he dumps me for stupid shit...I love how crazy and different he is...I love that he's emotional...I love that he's kinda bipolar....I love the way he laughs...the way he puts his hands around my waist and treats me when he's with me... I love his view on life except with how he sees himself....he's a responsible man and he's trying to do what's best for him and his family...I understand it completely...but it's so hard when he pushes me away...

What am I to do? I hate that he's doing this...I can't fucking stand it.... I want this to stop...he was fucking drunk as hell yesterday. He was so honest with me. Not so hidden at least so I think...I'm just confused...I want to be with him...I do but I guess this is what I get for going with someone with so much baggage.. it's what I get. Fuck. It's my karma....

Last night we were both drunk and it was the best conversation we had in a little bit...I guess in a week. Idk. He admitted to being a bad bf, he admitted to having issues, and that he's crazy. He admitted that he loves me and that he wants to be with me. But that it's complicated...it is complicated...but he blames that we moved this too fast. I said sorry and he goes, yeah I shouldn't have let it...that made me feel kinda bad even though I was the biggest part of it.. but I know what I wanted and I'm sorry he's the one I want and it's tearing me apart knowing he's okay with this being done..that's exactly how it feels...completely...

I've felt things for him completely. I do still...he's...the guy I saw living life with....he's the guy that's a constant to me...I dream of him every night...and it's like now. He's pushing me away so hard. I'm expecting this to be over tomorrow....I don't want it to be... I can't seem to get him to understand what he means to me...but I'm only selfish because theres nothing more I want than continue this crazy thing we have... I'm so afraid I'm going to cry tomorrow when we discuss this...I don't like this...I don't...it's like....

I finally found someone that I feel is perfect for me. Of course this was too good to be true. Man, it fucking sucks... And it's like he doesn't even give a shit at all...unless he's really pushing me away... I guess we'll find out tomorrow.... Im excited for the talk so we can get shit figured out and know where we are going from there.. but he'll be laying down the law what he wants... I just want him to be happy... I don't want to be selfish because I want to be with him but I want to be so bad... I love him so much. I fell so hard...he's exactly what I've asked for. Besides the fact he doesn't play with my hair....😭

Anyways...I need to stop....I'm fucking pathetic...we all know that though....

0 notes

madigabz · 6 years

Text

1-21-18

Yesterday was so busy at work I slept until 2:30pm today...I was still able to get one thought in before I passed out & that was me calling you my bf on the phone. I didn't mean to do that. I am trying to find out where to move to. If I stay here or go to South Carolina. I like it here and I don't want to be away from my siblings bc so much bs happened months after I moved to Colorado and I hated not being there 😞

I know we aren't dating. Honestly Alan, I have expected you to be with other people this whole time. Just like Valentyne giving you trust issues, you have given me them as well. You say you live in the present, but that's really contradicting when you're comparing me to that cunt in any aspect. Even if you don't fuck someone as soon as you get out- I'm going to get old. And if you need new pussy/ arm candy, like you do $ I have no luck. So please don't sugar coat your intentions and lie to me. I'm sorry I hurt you but to be honest with you; I never expected to end up in a relationship with you. Read this draft I found the other day about you

"1-16-13 when i said id stop talking to you you said shit happens-you said you would of neverrr been with me if makayla lived closer-you said shit happens if you get put back into foster care-you dont care if ppl are in your life or not-you walk away easily-you get pissed off easily-you get closer to me then ignore me and sometimes tell me you want to be done-you called me a bitch and you wouldnt sit in the back with me for whatever reason when we went to detroit then you fucked me at whits gmas..why do you think i slept on the couch?-you barely text me or talk when we hang out-you dont explain yourself all that much anymore-you like being right too much or proving your point :p-you rather be pissed off then fix it, even if what you heard was a rumor

you know me-i could tell you anything-you like the things people hate-youre real, sometimes-you see life the same way i do i think-you can be a gentlemen and drive or wipe off my car or just be sweet or cute-we have a five second rebound with each other-youre honest-you dont like getting close to people-youre stubborn-youre so adorable 🙂 <3-im scared that youll just walk away and be able to do it like i was nothing-you make me feel special when you say some of the things about why you like me & how i make you feel-you make me happy the way not a lot of people can-you play xbox too much and you arent social-youre playful-youre cute with kids-you do you and you dont change for people or around people-you always mess with me and attempt to give me hickies!!!!-you warn me and mess with my head-and you give up on a lot so easily-but i always have fun with you laughing and smiling

ill never meet another you thats for sure

and youve taught me how to be more independent and not put up with shit

even though i put up with a lot of your damn shit lol

i dont think we will date or ever get along all that well, itd never work i feel like but i wanted you to ask me out so badly especially when i found out you were going to! But im happy i met you even if youve made me feel really shitty before you were def one of those people to come into my life to learn from them. I trust you and I trust you with my happiness so I hope we can just make the best out of everything."

Alan, I don't expect anything from you. I do appreciate you and value you so much. But we were never suppose to be together, we are each others soul mates and all that we have done and continue to do is teach each other. I made all these videos this past year, talking about the shit you'd say to me while visiting. Saying to myself that we aren't going to work out 😞 even if I excuse all of the past, you still say shit that isn't okay. I've mentioned everything before so I'm not going to sit here and play the blame game. I know I did this. I sacrificed everything hoping you'd change your views on everything in your life. Values & thoughts. I couldn't do anything to help you see the beauty in this world or even within myself. Bc nothing is enough for you to be happy and satisfied. I am going to mail out everything I read today back in October. You won't want to read once you're out lol. It'll explain so much to you. I appreciate you telling me how you feel and I'm glad you're saying it before you get out. "You need to figure out where and who is best for you and do it." It's not that easy bc the bigger picture isn't about me and my feelings. I gave in and went to see you last month....but I know that all that we go through is a lesson that we are suppose to learn from in this life. Our souls have been through many lifetimes and ALL of our souls have to find our divine purpose in each life/ journey they encounter. We are just in the skin of two souls that have been together in past lives. Just like I said at 17 yos you are someone I am suppose to learn from.

What do you mean about learning from my actions, even my picture perfect as? lol. I know it wasn't smart, I had a feeling that something was going to happen. But I'm wreckless and destructive. I consider as my future as well, but I'm still only relying on myself. Which is the way it should be... but I have always known that I was going to be alone, doing my own thing; living in my own world on this journey. I don't hold anything to anyone. I don't anticipate on people staying or even being the person I project them out to be. And I own my own pain that I self inflicted. I accept that chance & still see people for the beautiful, imperfect human being that they are. People are worth the pain. You are worth the chance. "You can't change someone that doesn't want to change for themself." That just shattered so much hope I had for you. I just want the best for you and for you to be positive and happy. Meditating, eating well, healthy, HAPPY. But idk how to do that for you and the more I try the more my heart keeps breaking. And I keep surprising myself. I think that I can't hurt more, but it's never true. I know it all happens for a reason Alan. I'm trying to be as strong as you've taught me to be. Angel told me I had darkness in me that doesn't belong to me. I hold this cloud too no matter how much I try to shine. There's negative in everyone but you drive to the bad instead of ever being optimistic and seeing the good. You'll see in my letter... being aware and knowledgeable makes you more prone to being sad and having no hope. A new girl at the candlelab, Arin, is just like me. She went to Australia and Australians were shocked over how many ppl are depressed and have anxiety in America. She says they don't touch the food we eat everyday. She says it's the food- sugar and pesticides. America is so far up it's own ass we don't see how shitty everything actually is here. so unauthentic. I believe in karma. But beyond religion, what we believe in, luck or karma- all that matters is how we deal with it. I just ram into so much in my life that I am trying to be more gentle to myself and my feelings. I have been trying to mend myself so much lately. Learn how to handle this. Idk how moms deal with soooo much negativity and crazy shit that happens within her family. Like meme and my mom. So much makes sense to me now. I know nothing makes you happy Alan. Not even me, and everytime you let me go- bc you say "you know you aren't good enough" I run back. Even though I can't love you through it, I still try to pour all of me into you. Because I love you. But both of us are so exhausted already. What's the meaning to life? Being in the present, self love...we destroy our planet and all that we have is this earth. There must be other planets with living organisms. Who knows why we are here. Ppl have babies to try to make themselves feel better and be happy. But the world is so corrupt why keep us around? I'm just sleeping and moving, I'm not "living." Being a virgo my purpose is "I serve." That's literally what life consists of and I actually 100% agree with that and know its true. Aries is "I am." Tbh with you you are the only reason why I want to live and it shouldn't be that way. You have too much power over me and no matter how much I want to trust..I just can't. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm not letting myself have the strength to go on on my own </3.It's time. I'm thankful for the trees and that I can swim. I just want to swim away. Just keep swimming for the rest of my life....what's happiness? What's the purpose of life? Self love. That's all that I got. All that I have left. All that I'm trying to get to. I hope everything goes good for your out date too. I don't think we should we fuck. And I understand if you want to be with other people. I've been slowly peeling off the band aid and it's time to rip it off.

I still want to pick you up but I can’t sleep with you. You’re my best friend but I don’t want to lie to myself or you. You know I’m not your future. Are both of us suppose to walk alone our whole lives? You know you got me wrapped around your finger. Do you have to let it linger? I’m sorry I hurt you. I hope all that I’ve done has helped you begin your spiritual journey to the light. Happiness, optimism, self love & rightousness. You’re definitely the reason for mine. Crying all day.

You’ll be out here so soon. Taking on the world and conquering it...I love you warrior.

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jeffandsarahrelationship · 6 years

Text

the ballad of jeff and sarah

this is a blog to basically do two things .....to help me heal by putting it all out there and to get people who want to know what happened between us a place to see it and to stop Inboxing me about.....the following is my account and my account of the events alone....i cant speak for sarah or others involved because im not them....they can feel free and post a blog of their accounts if they wish.....this is just me trying to get over a breakup that i had my heart in....after this all quesstions or inquiries will be ignored if sent to my inbox i just want to move forward....and my therapist thought this blog would be a good way to do that....

so... i met sarah at a mutual friend jamies bday party.....jamie, richard, erica, rickie, and sarah all went....she stunned me .....such a beautiful woman that i couldnt speak right away ....i got shy ...she spoke to me first and then we started a convo...she, i and richard pretty much talked to each other the whole night .....we added each other on facebook and at the dinner she had a bf so i didnt think anything would happen....i was also talking to someone but nothing was set at that time.....i had talked to richard after that and he said he was interested in her as well...but that she had a boyfriend so we were out of luck....we began sending facebook messages back and forth for about 3 or 4 days ....the more we talked the more i was facinated by her likes, her interest, and just all around her perkiness, we both agreed there was something there but neither of us thought we should persue it.....but we did .....we decided to meet and go out to eat just to talk and get to know each other..i promised her ..while she had a boyfriend i was not going to try anything.......the sexual chemistry was strong that day....she asked if we could make out...so we did .....and it just keep going further....i couldnt fight what i felt for her.....we did stop though to go eat and talk.....and it was an amazing conversation....its safe to say i was enchanted by this woman....we then went back to her place where we got physical.....i felt like dog shit that i could do that to another person....not her ....her boyfriend.....but i couldnt get sarah out of my mind....we met i think two more times within the next two weeks....i had finally went on one date with the other girl....but i did not feel that connection to her that i did sarah.....ive tryed apologizing to her....but i dont blame her for hating me.....sarah wanted me to be her side piece i guess but i told her i couldnt do that ....it wasnt right doing that to john....her boyfriend at the time...so i told her i was ending things with the one i was seeing but that i wanted to be with her ....but i couldnt be her side man....i wanted to be her boyfriend....its john or me i said.....then i figured id never see her again....but she chose me and broke up with john.....so we started dating officially.....i was so happy....this amazing girl had chose me .....needless to say ....i fell pretty quick....i spent alot of time with her ....i wanted her to know im not gonna just leave....that i cared about her....she said she loved having me around that much as well...but dont all couples at the beginning i guess....we were honest about everything as far as i know....but i feel like she was...shes has extreme depression and a food disorder.....having never dealt with that ...i wanted to do my best to help or at least be there for her when she needed me....she also had social anxiety ..shes also thought about being polyamourous which i wasnt sure if i was open to....but maybe .....so we hung out with my friends and i told her i wanted her to make some friends with mine....so she would have an outlet.....her therapist told her to make female friends to...since she had only guys friends at that time....well she really got to know richard in that time..she was in awe of him....all his experiences and life choices he had made....what he knew about art and other things....she told me she was growing a crush on him.....which i was like ..ummmmm cause i know he had a crush on her.....i even made comments about them hooking up with i regret completely now...maybe i guess i just wanted to get it over with and hope the crush would dissappear.....

.she had told me in our conversations that when she feels an emotional connection with someone she has a hard time controlling herself ....pretty much a she did with me....

now i didnt worry about any of this or did we ever have problems until one day when she had a bad suicidal depression episode ....i had to work the next day but i tryed to talk her down....as did her therapist and others that she told me....so the next day i got done at work and went to see her....she was surprised to see me and said that she had already set up to hang with some people to help her.....but since i showed up she said did i want to join.....turned out she had talked to richard and wanted to have a convo with him alone....i didnt like that....i got scared and worried cause i knew they both had crushes on each other....but as a boyfriend....i didnt want to stop her from getting help for her depression if he could help......so i took her to his house and i went home for two hours and let them talk....my brain was eating me alive ....but i trusted my gf even after what she told me .....and i trusted richard who was my best friend since moving up here.....after i picked her up ....i told her about all that ...that i was uncomfortable about it....and why .....that it really was bothering me.....she did her best to reassure me that nothing was going on with richard ....and i felt better once she was in my arms again.....after that ....everytime she wanted to go out...she was like lets go to richards cause he has surround sound and such...but it was like ....anytime we went out....lets hit up richard.....so i got exteremly uncomfortable and told her.....then a couple of sundays ago....while i had my daughter ....she went with richard jo and jamie to the knoxville zoo....i was sad i couldnt go but i hoped they had fun.....i messaged her during that time to just know she was having fun....as well as to shut my brain down of the fact she was with richard.....

when they got home....i was supposed to pick her up and go back to her place....when she got here....she asked again if i would wait an hour so that her and richard could talk alone again.....i freaked....i was not having it....i was about in tears upset....why does she keep wanting to talk to him.....they both have a crush ...no no no no......but i said go ahead and talk....but i drove over at the same time....i sat in the drive way about 10 mins....my mind running in circles....i couldnt take it....were they talking about us....did she make a move on him like she did me while she was with john.....i didnt know i couldnt take it....so i got out of the truck and went around the back and tryed to listen to the convo.....i know this is not a good look on me ....but i wasnt thinking straight.....i was scared to death....i sat there a min trying to listen then realized what i was doing.....so i went around the front ...knocked on the door and told them both we needed to talk.......

i told them i wasnt comfortable with them being alone ....i didnt want anything to happen between them....that i knew she wanted richard which she confirmed right then that she wanted us both.....so i freaked again....and it ended up becoming a conversation about how richard could take care of her better than i could....richard said cause of my scared nature of what might happen he may have to bow out of a friendship with him and sarah....sarah took her hand from me at that point....sarah and i at the end were both drained...we went home....talked more between us ....and she said well if he doesnt want to be friends...i guess thats it.....but i thought me and her were ok....the next day we spend the morning together happy as can be....i took her to her group and picked her up....she was happy....however while she was in group richard sent a group message to both of us saying he had seen where i was out back trying to listen or see in.....and that he couldnt be friends anymore with her while we were together....she held my hand ...until she read his message....took it away and never gave it back....we were gonna go on a hike but she said take her home instead....where she dumped me......i left crying.....blaming myself.....barely able to see...i cryed for two days ......the first day i watched the chattooine meeting and they were sitting next to each other....i went into a deep depression.....finally on wens or thurs she messaged me.....telling me she still loved me but he didnt know what she wanted ...that she did want richard...but she also wanted me....she told me the truth about what had happened between her and richard in those first few days....but thats their business so i wont share that here.......however we talked and talked and she asked me could i be poly with her and richard .....i said i didnt know....also that jack had asked her out as well as talking to her ex john....who she said she might have sex with or not....why tell me that?

well we talked and she asked me to pick her up friday so we could talk about being poly.....we did and i didnt know if i could do that ...share my girl with another man....but i thought about giving it a shot.. i even messaged a few friends to get their advice on the subject....we then made love that night....i dont think she told that to richard.....the friday after the breakup.....and she talked to me all day saturday telling me being poly would be great ...i would see.....having thoughts about me and richard and her.....he then picked her up saturday night....and sunday they went facebook official ....i had to get out of this so i blocked them both.....i couldnt handle it.....it sent me back into depression mode.....so monday i told her over phone...i couldnt be poly .....i couldnt share my girl....she told me it didnt matter cause she was with richard now....and thats pretty much where im at....trying to move on..

NOW IM NOT LYING ABOUT NONE OF THIS....IT IS SIMPLY MY ACCOUNT OF THE SITUATION....I ALSO HAVE SCREENSHOTS TO BACK UP MOST OF WHAT IVE SAID .....SO I CAN PROVE IM NOT A LIER....i am not trying to break up richard and sarah.....she even told me today she thinks he the one...and good for her.....but i needed to get this out of my system and to also stop all the inbox questions....cause damn guys.....it fucking hurts .......i lost my best friend and the woman i loved.....and 50 of you ....wanted to know the details so here they are.....

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