#okay gn I’ll rb this again for a few hours

[crybaby-bkg]

when Dabi realizes just how much he loves you, it scares him at first. it’s a new feeling really, foreign and unearthly to him. a strange phenomenon that makes his chest twist tighter than the knots you tie in his shoes when he’s too weak to do it himself, when he pushes past his physical limit.

as he lays beside you in bed, he takes the entirety of you in. the slope of your nose and the skin of your cheeks and the curve of your mouth and your gentle hands that pillow your head. he takes you in, unblinking form laying beside yours, all quiet breaths interrupted by your rumbling snores.

he wonders if he should burn everything you’ve built with him to the ground. literally and metaphorically, emotionally and verbally. it’s all he knows, the flames, the uncontrollable fear that enrages him. he’s never had a good thing stay this long in his life, and he wonders if you’re up to no good inside that pretty little head of yours.

all he knows is destruction and chaos, but you’re something new. something mellow that cools off the flames and bandaids the scars and kisses the healing wounds. he’s not used to the comfort, to the easy, to the love, to the acceptance, to the—the you. he’s used to fucking shit up when it gets too good, but he’s not sure he can handle seeing the aftermath of watching you patch your skin together again and staple your wallpaper back up after he’s melted it from its foundation

so he thinks he’ll stay, for now at least. wait for the catastrophe, the explosion that always becomes of him wherever he goes. he’ll be prepared for it this time, he tells himself as he finally closes his eyes, knocking your shoulder once to wake you.

“Stop your damn snoring. Can’t get a lick of sleep.” He tells you, voice rough and ragged in his throat. but you don’t bite at him like he expects you to, hopes you do. you only blink sleepily at him before you smile, scooting closer until you make yourself small against his front, hands grasping the front of his baggy sleep shirt in your fists.

“Sorry. Love you.” You say, so gentle, it almost makes Dabi ache. why can’t you match his flame? why won’t your love for him flicker away like a dwindling candle? why do you keep loving him?

“Love you too. Now go the hell back to sleep.” He whispers, voice suddenly thick. you only giggle, a raspy little sound as you whisper back an okay, before drifting off again. And even though he complains about it, Dabi can’t fall asleep until your snores start up again. Then, he knows it’s safe to sleep. Then, he knows you’re there with him. Then, he knows that he has you and can hold you and maybe let you in just a little bit closer.