#ompoop

[cyclocosm]

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A post shared by Cosmo Catalano (@howtheracewaswon)

DID HE OR DIDN’T HE? It’s been awesome to watch @yveslampaert emerge as a serious threat for @deceuninck_quickstepteam over the last few seasons, but he might have tipped his hand a bit in the closing K at @omloophetnieuwsbladofficial this weekend. An attack just outside 2k had a look back just before, immediately after, and a again a few beats later—not exactly telegraphing a serious belief in race-winning power. While I’d still tab @jasperstuyven as the faster finisher all other things being equal (which they *never* are after 5 hours of racing) the glimpses might have given the @treksegafredo rider that little extra confidence to take on the sprint from the front. Regardless, I’m still stoked to see both riders (and teams!) battle for the the rest of #classicsseason 🎥@eurosport #ohn #omloop #hetvolk #ompoop #omloophetvolk #spingclassics #springclassics2020 #cobbledclassics #procycling #uciworldtour #omloophetnieuwsblad #omloophetnieuwsblad2020 #howtheracewaswon #htrww #hetnieuwsblad #worldtourcycling #soundon #soundon🔊 (at Gent, Belgium) https://www.instagram.com/p/B9PCYgOF_1v/?igshid=1ae5mgxjcfpqg

[stagekiller]

(cursed) FANMAIL HAS ARRIVED !!!

Anonymous says; *a mysterious hooded figure approaches the clown man, a heavy basket in their arms. quickly they thrust it towards him, making certain he's holding it before running away*            

 🃏  —CURIOUS BY NATURE, the clown extends both hands, welcoming the gift. Of course it could be a bomb but you won’t catch Jerome stressing about that. Stress creates wrinkles. He’s got enough wrinkles as is.

“ Ooh~ What’s this. ” He coos, but once the basket lands in his arms, the jester bends forward with a grunt, as if he’s labored by the weight. “ Oof, heavy... ” After settling it down, Jerome carefully pinches the cloth concealing its contents and peers underneath... only to be met with a baby. It has the most empty, beaded gaze the clown has ever seen. Its face is red like a rash and its tiny hands are occupied with scrunching the fabric of a milky white onesie. This infant could not possibly be older than four months.

 “ ... Oh. ” A devious grin crosses the clown’s features. He feigns some momentary thoughtfulness before reaching inside to pick the baby up, big hands cupping its sides. Its tiny eyes go wide when it sees the face. “ And whose snatch did you pop out of? ” Glasgow grin puckers. The child watches his mangled features move with profound interest. Jerome feigns a nervous grimace. “ Don’t tell me you’re comin’ from some fling— ‘cause karma’s a bitch an’ so was Tiffany, Patricia, Michelle, Mariah, Latifa, that paraplegic one and that dude...” He raises the baby higher, its little feet dangling in mid air. While Jerome talks, all the child wants to do is reach out and touch his face texture.

   “ What should I name him... Bernard? Nah, too boring. Atreus? .. Too fancy. Mmm... Stinkybutt ? ” A comical purse of his mangled lips. He rotates the child in mid-air, as if to assess if the name would fit. “ Nah... It’s too common. Mmm... how about.. Ninck? Yeah, that would do. Ninck. From Nincompoop. ” Jerome lights up. It’s the perfect choice!

 “ ‘magine having to say that when teachers ask what’s it from, eh? Oh boy. Sucks to be you, Ninck! ” A malicious cackle. Then, suddenly, he sniffs noisily, bringing the baby a tad closer, to where its tiny hands finally find purchase on Jerome’s scarred cheeks. “ ..Guh! Ugh, changed my mind; Stinkybutt it is. Mr. Mime! Mr. Mime. ”  He holds the tiny human at a distance, but his nose remains scrunched in distaste. His trusty henchman arrives within seconds.

          “ Bring forth the emergency diaper changin’ station. ”

  Obliging immediately, the mime charades the piece of furniture, gesturing over its flat surface as if his hand would paint it into existence. Of course, this is far from the case. It does little to dissuade Jerome from nearing the supposed station, baby in hands, however. And there he goes. About to place it on a non-existent table— ...

[nonprocycling]

#ompoop Nice. :) https://t.co/Ak5luAuHsy